Sidney was incredible last night. I just couldn't handle any more yesterday and Sid knew it. I forgot how good it is to have someone take care of you. Actually, I don't know if I've ever had someone take care of me like Sid has since I've known him. It terrifies me to let him in like this because I know that I'm leaving at the end of the season. I guess I can either got with it or stop it now. Since I don't think I could stop if I wanted to, and I don't want to, so I'm going to go with it as long as I'm here.

I felt bad that I had to leave so early but it is a game day which means there is a lot to do for the game. Of course the rest of the work doesn't go away because there's a game. I just finished my game day team meeting and everyone is on their way. I'm really impressed with the way the team has taken control of their new responsibilities and roles. Sam has taken to being a team leader so well. Katie is embracing her role leading the In the Room project. The interns have even stepped up their game too. The team is coming together. Soon I'm going to have to find my replacement, well, a replacement for Tom. They don't need someone as experienced as I am.

I manage to take a break to watch some of the practice. I started finding it relaxing to watch practice. The skates on the ice, the slapping of the puck, even the whistles are soothing to me. I must be going crazy to find this soothing. Dan doesn't like something so he blows his whistle. The guys reset and start again. Dan must like what he sees this time because the next group goes too. I see some of the Devils' players at the tunnel watching. This is one thing I still find weird; they are ok with the opposing team watching practices. It's not just the Pens, every team is ok with it. I guess they all watch video of each other so it's about who can execute. Who cares if they watch you practice then?

When practice is done, Sid stays on the ice with Kris. I have no idea what they're setting up right now. Sid is in front of the net and it looks like Kris is about to shoot pucks at him. I watch as Kris shoots the puck. Sid hits it out of the air and redirects it into the net. Then he does the next one and the next one. I can't even follow the puck with my eyes so I have no idea how Sid is picking it out of the air with his stick. It's crazy just how good he is; I can't believe it. "He's amazing, isn't he?" I turn and see Mario sitting behind me. I didn't even hear him sit down. "Mario, I can't even see the puck. I have no idea how he's doing it." Mario laughs and replies "from doing what he's doing right now. Practice, practice and more practice. When they're out there they can't think out it. They just do it. They just react." It makes sense. "Your father left?" Mario asks me. We both know that he already knows the answer. "Yes, early this morning." I wait to see where Mario is going with this but he only says "we really appreciate everything you're doing here Sloan." He pats my shoulder as he stands and goes back up. For a moment, Mario looked like he was going to say something but must have decided against it. I see why Mario and Sid are so close. They have the same temperament and similar personality; that quiet strength, so reassuring to those around them. I know that I feel it when I'm with either of them.

I see Geno come back out to the ice and he waves me down. When I get to the seats by the tunnel, Geno opens a door I didn't know was there to let me onto the Pens bench. "I want to say thank you" Geno says. When he doesn't say more, I ask "for what?" He smiles "no more reporters call my parents." I forgot all about that with the other issues I've been dealing with these days. "You're welcome Geno. When they get here for the playoffs then I'll see if they want to do an interview with Roots but if they don't we are not under any obligation." He smiles his unique lopsided, goofy grin and says "spasibo" then heads down the tunnel. I turn to the ice in time to see Kris and Sid cleaning up the pucks. I don't know why I'm surprised to see them doing that but I always am. I guess I would have thought that there would be someone else who would take care of the pucks and not million dollar players. When they come off the ice, they both stop where I'm standing. "Hi guys, ready for tonight?" I ask. Kris laughs and says "elle nous donne quelque chose à jouer pour." Amused, I reply "je suis tellement content que je peux aider " and both Kris and Sid look stunned at me. "Oui, je parle Français." Kris laughs and Sid shakes his head. I may not speak Quebec French but my Paris French is flawless. Kris heads down the tunnel to the locker room. Sid pauses beside me and softly asks "tonight?" I look at him surprised, I thought he'd be too tired after the game but say "sure." We grin for a moment at each other and then he heads to the locker room.

I look at my watch and see that I have a little time before my meeting so I head to the locker room to watch the media scrum. The press has just been led into the room as I approach it. I hang back and watch the scene. To an outsider it might look like chaos but I can see the organization of it. It's choreographed perfectly. Jennifer is really coming into her own. She has complete control of the room and the interns are in the right places. The players and reporters are intense and then, when time is called, the reporters leave to file their stories and the players are stripping off their gear. It's a great accomplishment for Jennifer and her team. When she's finished, I call her over. "Hi Jen, how do think the scrum went?" She looks at me surprised and says "um, well, it went well, I think." I'm reminded again at how badly Tom treated these people that they are so unsure at a simple question about their performance. "Well Jen, I think it's working really well. You have control of the room and both the players and the reporters have settled into the process. Congratulations to you and your team." I look at Jen and she's beaming. I have to remember to give the team more feedback on how they're doing to continue to build their confidence. I say goodbye to Jen and head up to my office for my meeting. The rest of the day will be quiet until the doors open for the game. Damn, I have that meeting with Ian before the game. I really don't want to meet with that slime. Hopefully it will be quick and then I can focus on the game.

I stopped by Sloan's office before leaving the rink and she was in a meeting so I just went home for my nap. I'm so glad that she agreed to come over after the game. We'll probably have the day off tomorrow since we don't play for two days and then we have a road trip. We just had warm ups on the ice and are waiting to go out for the start of the game. The room is quiet as it usually is before a game. Dan comes in to give us the last minute talk of what to focus on then we just wait for the signal to go. Everyone has their own routines before we go out to the ice. I sit at my stall until I see the guys start to go out. Geno wipes the whiteboard with the opposing team's line up, we do our handshake and then we get in line to go out. I see Sloan standing to the side and she looks odd; very tense like she was last night with her dad. I know he left so I don't know what this is about. I catch her eye and she smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes. Something is definitely wrong.

As I hit the ice, I put everything but the game out of my mind. I focus on the puck, the ice and the net. The first period goes by without a goal. Both Flower and Brodeur are hot and stop everything thrown at them. We got some good chances but nothing went in. At the intermission, Dan talks about staying the course and it'll go in; we just need to keep doing what we're doing. He's right because when we get on the ice again, I find Sutter near the net, make a pass and he shoots it in only two minutes into the second period. Four minutes later, Kuni is all alone on a breakaway and then it's 2-0. We got a little sloppy on the power play and the Devils get a short-handed goal at the end of the second period. I hate these goals he most because there's no fucking reason for a short-handed goal. You have to fuck up for them to get a short-handed goal. We go into the third period pissed off about that Devils goal which means goals; first Tanger, then me and then Bortuzzo. We end the game winning 5-1. We talk to the media first and I see Sloan standing at the doors. She looks less tense and more tired now. I'll have to take care of her tonight. Of course that thought sends my mind in interesting directions and I miss the last question so I bring my attention back to the press.

When the media scrum is done, the team does its ritual of awarding the helmet to the best player of the game. It goes to Kuni who got a goal and two assists. I see that Sloan is still at the door but is being pulled away by Ian from marketing. The mood of the room is light and the music blaring while everyone cools down on the bikes and then showers. I'm the last one out, as usual, and I text Sloan to see if she's still around. When I don't hear back, I head up to the offices. There shouldn't be anyone up there now but I bet Sloan went to do some work while she waited for me to finish. We really need to do something relaxing soon. I know we can't go out but I should be able to think of something that we can do. I'm always practicing or working out and she's always working. I'll have to think of something.

As I get closer to Sloan's office, I see the light coming from the half opened door. Exactly where I thought she'd be. About six feet from her door, I stop in my tracks when I hear a muffled cry. It's coming from Sloan's office so I run to her door and throw it open. I'm stunned for a second. Ian has Sloan pushed over her desk. His hand is over her mouth and his body is pushed over hers. Her shirt is ripped open. She's thrashing about to break free and trying to scream through Ian's hand. I notice all of this in a second and it only takes me two more to get to Sloan. I pull Ian off and, before I can think, I punch him once, twice, three times before he falls to the ground. He could be knocked out, he could be dead for all I care, I turn from him go to Sloan. She's sitting up now. Her face is white except for a welt on her cheek. I reach for her and she shrinks back like I just burned her. Her eyes are wild and she looks terrified. For a moment, I don't know what to do. I stay where I am and try to catch her eyes. When they are finally on mine, I say "Sloan, it's me, Sidney." She's still not really focusing. "Sloan, come on baby, look at me. It's Sidney." She finally focuses on me and whispers "Sidney?" I hear people in the hall so I quickly take off my jacket and put it around her before she can pull away more. Just as I'm doing that, Sam comes in the door with Beth. "What's going on?" Sam asks. "Is Sloan ok?" Beth asks at the same time. I gesture for them to come over and they gasp when they see Ian on the floor then glance at me. "Ian attacked Sloan." They're stunned and look down at Ian. I pull out my phone and call Mario. When he answers I say "come up to Sloan's office; urgently." He replies "on my way." I hear Ian moan and say to Sam "make sure he's fine but keep him here. Mario is on his way."

I touch Sloan's arm and she jumps back with a cry. This time, instead of touching her, I gesture for her to follow me and lead her to her washroom. When we're inside, I shut the door and turn to her. Her hair is half out of her bun. Her shirt has clearly been ripped open. As I look down, I see that her stockings are ripped. Oh God! I'm desperate to ask if he … I can't even think it never mind ask but I just have to know. "Sloan" I say as gently as I can. When she looks at me, her eyes still huge and her face impossibly pale. "Sloan, did he?" I can't even finish my question. She stares at me but shakes her head. Thank God. If he'd, done that, then I'd have to kill him. I take one of the towels and wet it. When I try to touch her, again she cringes away. It's killing me to see her like this; she's terrified. "Baby, you're very pale. They towel is cool. Let me wipe your face a little, ok?" She looks from me to the towel and then back again. When she nods, I slowly wipe her face with the cool towel. She has a little colour come back into her face now. There's a knock on the door and Sloan scurries back to the wall again. "Stay here baby. I'll come back, ok?" She looks between me and the door a few times and then nods.

I open the door and slip out. Mario is there but he's the only one in the room. "What happened?" he asks me softly. I pull him away from the door so that Sloan can't hear us. "Mario, when I came in, he had her pushed over the desk and was trying to …" I can't even finish it. I see the question in Mario's eyes so I shake my head and he lets out a breath he's been holding. "She does have a welt on her cheek like he hit her. Her clothes are torn up. Mario, she's terrified; not just scared, terrified. I need to get her out of here without anyone seeing her. I'm sure that you've called the police but she can't talk to anyone right now. It's like she's in shock. We don't have practice tomorrow so I'm going to take her to my place. She's comfortable there and" I stop realizing what I just said. Mario gives me a small smile. "Sid, I've known you for seven years. You lived in my house for most of those years. Don't you think that I know there's something going on between you and Sloan?" I guess I should have known he'd figure it out. "Sid, the police need to talk to her. Ian has been taken to the hospital so they want to talk to you too. We have the paramedics here to look at Sloan." I think for a moment. "Ok, let's have the police come in here, only one. I'll sit with her. I don't think she's up to the paramedics too. Mario, I'm not exaggerating, she's terrified." He nods and heads out of the office so I go back into the bathroom. Sloan must have been sitting on the toilet lid because she scurries up and against the wall. "It's me" I tell her. She has a little more colour to her face but she's still pale and clearly scared.

"Sloan" I say and her eyes come back to mine. Oh God, I don't want to tell her this part. "The police are here" I tell her; her eyes get wide and she shakes her head. "It's ok baby, I'll be right beside you. There is going to be one officer, we'll talk to them and then we'll go home, ok? It'll be over quickly." I say that part praying that it's true. When I open the door, Sloan clutches my arm. I much prefer this to her cringing from me. I see the police officer, it's a woman and she's sitting in a chair by the sofa. I lead Sloan over and we sit on the sofa together. She hasn't let go of my arm the whole time. "Mr. Crosby, Ms. Burkle, I'm sorry to have to do this now but we'll be as quick as we can, ok?" We both look at Sloan and she nods slightly. The officer opens her pad and says "can you tell me what happened Ms. Burkle?" Sloan nods and it's then I realize that, except for saying my name, Sloan hasn't said anything since I got here. "I, um, had a meeting with him earlier, before the game. It didn't go well. He was very angry." Sloan pauses here. The officer nods and asks "what was the meeting about?" Why the fuck does that matter? Sloan continues "um, he and I were working on something and I told him to put a plan together to present to me at the meeting. He met me but didn't have the plan. When I questioned him about it, he was cocky at first but then he got angry that I was questioning him." She pauses for a moment and I hand her my bottle of water that I forgot I had in my pocket until now. Sloan sips and then continues. "Anyway, I told him that I would have to talk to his manager about it and we would discuss it in the morning. It was almost game time." She pauses again and the officer let's her take her own time. When Sloan begins again, she's clutching my arm tighter. "After the game, outside the locker room, he said that he wanted to talk to me. We came up to my office; he didn't want to talk downstairs. I went to my desk. When I turned around, he punched me and I feel back against my desk." She sobs now and I just want to put a stop to this but I know it has to be done. "He ripped open my shirt, pushed open my legs and put his hand over my mouth when I tried to scream. I tried to get him off, I did, but I just couldn't" and she sobs on the last word again. I desperately want to put my arm around her and hold her tight but I don't know how she would react to that. The officer turns to me and asks "is that when you came in Mr. Crosby?" My turn I guess so I tell her what happened, including when I punched Ian. "Do you usually go to the offices after the game Mr. Crosby?" Ok, this is delicate. "Not usually, no; sometimes if I'm looking for Mario. This time I saw Sloan leave after the media scrum and came up here to find her." Not a lie and as close to the truth as I'm going to get. I'm a master of the non-answer answer. The officer nods and says "Ms. Burkle, are you sure that you don't want to see the paramedics?" Sloan answers "I don't want them, no. I just want to go home." The office stands and says "we may need to talk again but that's all for tonight. Please rethink the paramedics Ms. Burkle." After her last comment, she leaves the office, shutting the door behind her.

I can't stand it anymore so I detach Sloan's grip on my arm and pull her into me. She resists for a moment then clings to me, tight. A few minutes later, Mario comes in and says softly "everyone is gone." Sloan, startled, looks up at Mario with wide eyes. Mario doesn't know what to say after that so I say "come on Sloan. I'm going to take you to my place." She nods and, after we stand, grabs my arm again. Mario says "I've cleared everything from here to your car Sid. Please text me when you get home and I'll talk to you in the morning. Don't either of you come in here tomorrow, ok?" Sloan doesn't respond but I mouth 'thanks' to him. True to his word, we don't see anyone all the way to my car. I help Sloan into the passenger side and have to put her seatbelt on for her. She curls into herself in the seat. I get in quickly and try to make it the fastest drive home ever. As I think back over the night, I can't believe what's happened. It's crazy; truly crazy. I would never say this out loud, and I'm sure it is incredibly traumatic to be attacked as Sloan was, but her reaction seems extreme to me. I mean she was terrified like someone was trying to kill her. Fuck, I feel like an asshole even think that; I don't know what that kind of helplessness is like so I really shouldn't think this way.

I make the drive home in record time. When I open the passenger door, Sloan is staring straight ahead like she's in an awake coma. Going on instinct again, I lift her into my arms and she settles in them. I take her into the house and up to my bedroom. When I put her on the bed, she whimpers and softly says "shower." She doesn't move so I pick her up again and take her to the bathroom. I place her on the counter then turn the shower on. Coming back to Sloan, I see that she hasn't moved an inch. Going with instinct again, I take my jacket off of her and then her shirt. I help her stand and continue to undress her. As I pull off her bra, she cringes and I can see bruises coming up on her back. I feel an incredible rage that I've never felt in my entire life. I take a few deep breaths to calm down and lead Sloan to the shower. "Do you want me to help you?" I ask her softly. She looks at me blankly, at the shower, and then back at me. "No" is all she says and steps in. While she showers, I pick up all of her clothes and take them to the bedroom. I don't want to leave them out since they're ripped so I put them in my closet and take out a tee shirt and a pair of work out shorts for her. After putting them on the bathroom counter, I head back to the bedroom and strip down to my shorts. I turn down the bed and then text Mario. We go back and forth a bit and he tells me to let him know if we need anything. Right now I just want to focus on Sloan and we'll figure the rest out later.

As I look at the bed, I think oh shit, should I put a shirt on? Maybe I should sleep in one of the spare rooms. I'm still trying to figure out what to do when I realize that she's been in there for a very long time. I head back to the bathroom and hear the shower still going. I enter and head toward the shower when I see her, sitting in the corner of the shower hugging her knees to her chest. It breaks my heart to see her in this much pain. She's rocking back and forth and muttering to herself. I reach in and turn off the water. Sloan doesn't even know that I'm there. Crouching down in front of her, I can finally make out what she's saying. "Not again, not again, not again, not again, not again, not again, not again" over and over she says this. What does she mean 'not again;' oh fuck! This has happened to her before!