***Thanks for all the comments and response to this story! I really appreciate it. Sorry this is a couple days late, but I'm here now and I brought sexy Jasper with me!

***Thanks Lady Tazz and TwiCarol for putting up with my crazy schedule!

***I still don't own it.

Jasper

A week had passed since the incident with the young pregnant couple. Bella was doing her best to keep to the animal diet, but she was resentful. Not with me, she assured me of that, but with the way she was feeling. It was as if she was withdrawing, much the way an addict would.

Her emotions were desperate and confused. The only time she really seemed happy was when I was holding her. That gave me some comfort, but I wanted her to be happy all the time. She was constantly struggling with her choice. I knew eventually she'd come to terms with her decision, but how long that would take worried me.

"I don't know what to do with her?" I paced the yard. "Her mouth says one thing, but her actions show me something different."

"She's a vampire," Peter said. "Let her be a vampire."

I looked up at him in disgust. "You're not helping."

"Why don't you let me and Char take her out this week," he suggested. "Let her see what it's really like to hunt and then she can make an informed decision."

Having Bella hunt with Peter and Char made sense. Bella could see for herself what it was like to live the true life we were meant to live. The problem with that was, could I handle it? Could I relinquish my mate to another? I was the one who was supposed to show her how to deal with this life. I created her, and she was my responsibility.

"I can't ask you to do that."

"You didn't ask." he said. "I offered."

"It doesn't feel right."

"Turn your ability off for a second and rethink it," he said.

"If it were that easy, I'd turn my gift off and hunt with Bella," I reminded him. "Part of me wants to believe her struggle has to do with being a newborn. I honestly don't believe Bella would want to hunt humans. And, I think deep down she knows that."

"I don't know," he said. "She's so new. How could she know?"

"You're right," I said. "But, if she really wanted to hunt humans, she could've taken me up on my offer to help her the other day. She's proven she has some restraint."

"She wouldn't have hurt you that way." Peter sat on the porch steps. "She knew even if you didn't do the actual killing, you would've felt their fear. She wants to protect you the same way you protect her."

"So, what the fuck am I gonna do?"

"You once belonged to a coven that drank solely from animals. It seems like a no-brainer to me."

"I've thought about that, but I can't exactly trek across the world and take Bella to France. I'm having a hard enough time containing her to our backyard."

"Luckily for you, they're not in France," Peter said with a smile.

"What do you mean? How do you know?"

"I'm intrigued by the little one's gift, so I called Papa C to see if he had ever seen anything like it. He told me that he and Esme were headed back to the States for a brief time so he could assist with some hospital research in Seattle."

"They're coming back?"

"Yup, and maybe if you took Bella to see them, he could help you," Peter said. "It's worth a try."

It was a good idea. Maybe if Bella saw Carlisle and Esme, she'd realize why she wanted to feed from animals in the first place. Maybe if she were around someone other than me, she'd learn to accept that way of life.

"It's too close to Forks," I said. "What if I can't keep her from Charlie?"

"They're staying in a large house, deep in the woods, away from people and the city. It's isolated."

"I know it well. They had to take me there several times during my time with them. I hated it there because I couldn't pick up a human scent for miles. Once I spent two months at that property, trying to control my thirst."

"Did it work?"

I nodded.

"Do you remember what Alice said when you went to see her and Edward in Alaska?"

He knew I did since we forgot nothing.

"That they wouldn't see Bella until she was like us." I smiled because Alice knew I'd need them to help me with Bella. "Why doesn't she just tell me what I need to know?"

"She gets off on making you squirm, I guess." Peter laughed. "I'll call Carlisle and tell him you're coming."

"I can do it."

"Umm, yeah, you're gonna have a bigger problem." He nodded in the direction of the house.

"What?" I felt his amusement. The same amusement I always felt from him when he was talking about my girl. "She's been dying for me to take her somewhere. She hates being cooped up here."

"I don't think visiting the Cullens is what she had in mind."

"What do you know?"

"You really need to ask me that? Do I ask you what you can feel?"

I rolled my eyes.

"All I'm sayin' is, she may not be excited to reunite with Madam 'Know it All' and her mind reading sidekick."

"Edward," I whispered. "He could be a problem especially if Bella carried over any residual abandonment issues from her human life."

"Only one way to find out." He hitched his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the house. "Just give me and Char a few minutes to get out of the house."

"Come on," I said. "How bad could it be? This is Bella we're talking about."

"Exactly." He laughed and I felt his amusement again.

Fuck me!

"No! No! No!" She screamed, hurling the lamp across the room. "I won't go."

I ducked just as it passed by my head. Fuck, she was fast!

"Bella, it'll be good for you." I held my hands up as I walked toward her.

"I don't need to see them."

I stared at her for a few seconds, monitoring her emotions. Fear, stress, sadness, and abandonment were pouring off her. She carried it all with her to this new life. Of course she would, she never got a chance to resolve those issues. Perhaps I should've taken her to see them before I turned her?

"Don't make me go, Jasper," she begged. "I'm doing better. You know I can do this."

"They can help us," I said. "It might be good for you to visit with them and see how they hunt."

"I know how they hunt," she said. "Just like us."

"Tell me what the problem is." I grabbed her arm and pulled her against me, hoping my touch would assist her.

"I don't have a good feeling about going there."

"What?" I laughed, trying to lighten the mood. "You're an empath now?"

"I don't have to be an empath to know. I remember what they did to me."

"It was a long time ago, Bella, and I've explained why we did what we did."

"They left." I felt her heartache.

"So did I, but you forgave me. As a matter of fact, you wouldn't leave me alone when I came back to Forks, remember? I couldn't get rid of you and, believe me, I tried."

"You came back." She gently kissed me. "You wanted me."

"You belong to me," I pressed my forehead to hers, "for all of eternity."

"We only need one another," she said. "I don't have a good vibe about this, Jasper. If we go there, something will change."

"Something could change for the better." I stroked her cheek. "I hate seeing you struggle this way. I'm helpless, Bella, and I don't like it."

"You're not helpless." She shook her head. "You're not."

"You're my mate. My responsibility. I have to make things right for you."

"You do." She tried to assure me. "You are."

"I'm failing and it's tearing at me from the inside. I can't rest until I know you are at peace."

"Taking me to the Cullens won't solve anything." She let go of me and paced the room. I could feel her determination. She wasn't going to relent.

I didn't want to argue with her, but I was her mate and, as much as I tried to treat her as my equal, I was also her creator. In the vamp world, the two strongest ties for a vampire were with their mate or their creator. I was both for Bella and I needed her to listen to me.

"I can't give you a choice."

"Excuse me?" She stopped and stared at me.

"We're leaving for Seattle tomorrow."

"Oh, are Peter and Char going with you?"

"What? No."

"So, then you'll be traveling alone?"

"Isabella!"

"Jasper!"

She was challenging me and if this wasn't so friggin' important, I would've been amused.

"Bella, why are you being so stubborn? You said you trusted me. Let me figure this out."

"Not like this," she insisted. "It's not what's right for us."

"How do you know?"

"I can't explain it, but you need to trust what I'm feeling."

I took her hand and pulled her toward me. I closed my eyes and tried to decipher her emotions. God, she was all over the place.

"Stop it!" She pulled away from me. "I don't need you to monitor me now. Just listen to me."

I was frustrated and I hated when she pulled away from me. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"I can't live like this!"

Her head snapped up and her piercing red eyes looked directly into mine. I was almost afraid of her. "You can't live like this? Try being me."

"I was you, and I did this to you anyway."

"Don't you feel sorry for turning me. It was what I wanted. What I still want."

"I don't feel sorry, but I intend to make this right for you. For us. "

"I'm fine."

"You're not fine and I'm not living in denial anymore. I feel everything you do. And, because I love you, the emotions are magnified. Usually, when it's coming from other people, I can block them out, or at least try to, but not with you. We are connected in a way that even I didn't think was possible."

I plopped down on the bed and anxiously ran my fingers through my hair. How was I going to make her see she was living my life all over again? I wouldn't have wished that on anyone, much less the woman I would die for.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as she ran her fingers through my hair too. "It must be horrible for you."

"I don't want you to worry about me."

"That's ridiculous. This mate thing, well, it works both ways."

I could feel how much she loved me. It took my breath away. No matter what we were going through, I could always feel the love. It was the strongest bond I'd ever felt between any human or vampire. I'd encountered vampires who were mated for centuries and they didn't have anything on me and Bella.

I took her face between my hands and whispered, "Please tell me why you don't want to go."

She shook her head.

"They helped me Bella," I reminded her. "I would've been lost without them."

"You stopped drinking from humans because of me. When you came back to Forks, you were feeding from humans."

"And, you were what ultimately saved me, but Alice sent me to you. She said I'd find what was missing. When I went to visit Alice and Edward in Alaska, she said I'd see her again when you were like us. I think she knew we'd need their assistance."

"Why can't she just tell us what we need to know?" I felt her anger. "Why do we all live at her mercy?"

"It's just her way. I know it's frustrating, but her gift isn't an easy one to deal with."

"Neither is yours, but you don't go around destroying people's lives."

"Neither does Alice."

"If she knew I belonged to you, she should've told us. Why did she allow you to take a snap at me that night? She made you go back to feeding from humans. She allowed Edward to believe I was his. She made him abandon me in the woods. And, I lost months of my life. Do you know what that did to Charlie?"

I could feel her sadness and distress over her human memories. She carried it all with her. She just did a really good job of pushing them far enough down that I couldn't feel them.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

"And, you all left me. I was so attached to all of you. I loved them. What kinds of people do that? No one said goodbye."

She fidgeted with her hands, so I took them in mine.

"I can't face them." She looked down our joined hands. "It hurts."

Resentment, why didn't I figure it out before? She didn't want to live like the Cullens because she hadn't forgiven them for leaving her.

"What we did was wrong, and I thought you had come to terms with it, but I should've realized what you thought you wanted as a human, wasn't necessarily what you needed as a vampire."

"I don't understand."

"The Cullens were your first experience with the vampire existence and as a human you thought it was the best way because your mind couldn't process us feeding from humans. You looked up to us and admired us. We were perfect in your eyes."

"You still are." She smiled and I remembered how she would've blushed if she were still human.

"When we left, we hurt you, but you came to terms with it when I came back. Even though you had no contact with anyone other than me, you still viewed them as the ideal vampires. But, now that you're one of us and you're dealing with everything that goes with being a vampire, you're seeing they weren't so perfect. None of us were, not even me."

"You think I resent them?"

"I know you do. You've only had a resolution with me. I thought that was all you needed because I was the one that caused them to leave in the first place. I should've taken you to them before I turned you. I should've let them resolve what they had done."

"Do you think if I go to them, I'll be able to come to terms with the animal diet?"

"It's worth a try."

Initially I thought taking Bella to the Cullens and having her observe their way of life would be an asset, but now I realized it may be vital for her to see them so she could move past what had happened between them. Maybe I was grasping at straws, but what other option did I have?

"You're everything to me," I said. "I'll do anything I can to make your existence better. Please tell me what to do."

I hadn't felt this desperate in years. I didn't realize how draining it would be to feel Bella's emotions. She was trying so hard to please me ever since she opened her red eyes, but she was so afraid of failing. She still felt guilty about her slip up in the park and then for asking me to feed from that young couple. Throw in her constant struggle with human blood and I was exhausted.

"You're worried." She ran her fingertip across my bottom lip and then leaned in and gently kissed me. "Can't you feel how happy I am with you?"

I nodded as I tucked her hair behind her ear.

"The rest doesn't matter," she said. "I have you."

"You'll always have me. I'll figure out how to get you through this." I slowly ran my tongue along her lips and then pressed my mouth against hers, pushing out all of my love for her.

"I'll go," she whispered. "I'll do it for you, Jasper."

I reached for the buttons of her shirt and quickly undid them. "You don't have to do that." I slipped the shirt from her shoulders and let out a strained groan when I saw she wasn't wearing a bra.

She took my hand and pressed it against her unbeating heart. "I can see what this is doing to you. We'll give this a try."

I trailed my hand down over her breasts and then gently traced her nipples. She closed her eyes and threw her head back. I pushed her down on the bed and lowered my lips to her nipples, licking and sucking as I reached under her skirt, pushing my fingers inside her moist swollen folds.

She twisted her fingers in my hair as she arched her back, offering me more of her breasts. I licked my way down her stomach and hiked up her skirt.

No panties!

"What about the feeling you have about something bad happening?"

"You're the empath," she moaned as I hovered over her throbbing pussy. "You would know better than me."

I lowered my mouth to her entrance and slowly ran the tip of my tongue along her slit. "Just for a couple of days." I licked her again and I felt her lust for me increase. "If it doesn't work, we'll leave and go away for a while, just the two if us."

"Yess…" she raised her hips off the bed."You're all I'll ever need. You'll see." She moved her body closer to my face, pushing against my mouth. I threw her legs over my shoulders and took as much of her as I could.

I'll never tire of her taste.

She was so sweet and juicy. And her scent…it drove me wild. I fiercely licked and sucked her clit, slipping my fingers deep inside her core, working her with vamp speed.

"Jasper!" she cried as her thighs shuddered against my shoulders. Her hand slipped from my hair and dropped to the bed. She clawed at the comforter as she let go.

I continued to please her with my tongue knowing full well I'd be able to make her cum again, but I needed to be closer, so once I was satisfied she was coming down from her euphoric state, I tugged my shirt over my head. By the time I had it off, Bella was on her knees in front of me, pulling at my belt buckle.

"I love you," she whispered as she helped me out of my pants.

"I love you, too." I roughly kissed her lips as I stepped out of my clothes. "I need to be inside you."

She turned around and got on all fours before looking over her shoulder and smiling at me.

"Fuck." I whispered as I glanced at her pretty little pussy, dripping and waiting for me.

I moved behind her, gripped her hips and quickly slammed into her.

"Jasper!"

"Sorry, beautiful. I just couldn't wait."

"Fuck me hard…please!"

My vamp girl was hot. She took everything I gave to her and always wanted more. I pulled all the way out and pushed in over and over again. We could go like this for hours.

Bella pushed her body up until her back was flush against my chest. She grabbed my hands and moved them over her perfect tits. She growled when I squeezed each of them in my hands.

"That's so fuckin' sexy when you make that sound."

"I love feeling you inside me. It's amazing. God!"

"Cum on me!" I moaned. "Bella, I'm gonna…fuck!"

I slipped my hand down and pushed my fingers inside her hot sex and moved them in time with my cock. A few seconds later I collapsed on top of her back as I panted and gasped for air. I didn't need to breathe but she always managed to take it out of me. She sighed as I placed soft kisses along the back of her neck.

She rolled onto her back as I moved in next to her, pulling her against my body. She was happy and peaceful. Why couldn't I keep her that way all the time?

"I know you want to help me," she whispered. "I'll do what you ask, but you are all I'll ever need."

"And, you'll always have me. Just humor me."

"Seattle is a little way from Texas, isn't it?"

I felt her lust spike.

"It's a good ways, yes." I looked into her eyes. "What are you thinking?"

"That you'll make love to me under the stars every night. It'll just be the two of us for days, the way it was meant to be."

"I'll make love to you in every city from Texas to Washington, wherever and whenever you want."

"This is gonna be the best road trip I've ever taken, Major Whitlock."

"Darlin', you have no idea the things I'll show you."

***Wish I was going on that road trip! Oh wait…I'm writing it!