So here's what you missed on Alone With You
-Santana talks to Gabriella on the phone and she accuses Santana of having a girlfriend. Santana denies it immediately. Brittany overhears but quickly understands when she hears it's Gabriella
-She asks to grab lunch but gets off the line because Santana's father is calling her
-Santana finds Sam and learns he isn't mad, just needs some time to digest the news
-Kurt sets up a lunch for him and the girls
-Santana is hurting because her father isn't speaking to her, but Quinn reminds her that she doesn't talk to her father either and is much happier now
-Santana asks Brittany to stay over and Brittany helps Santana realize that she doesn't want people in her life who don't care about her
-Santana calls her mom for reassurance, and her mom reveals that her father is still helping her pay for Santana's tuition
-Brittany comforts a crying Santana and Santana realizes she's in love
XxxxxxxxxxxX
Brittany's alarm goes off and I feel her arm reach out from under me to silence it. Keeping my head on her chest, I tighten my grip on stomach. Without saying anything, Brittany plants a kiss on the top of my head and I break out into a smile.
"Morning," she mutters.
"Good morning," I giggle at her croaky voice. I've been up for awhile, so my voice already smoothed out.
I've been up pretty much all night, actually. I got a few hours here and there, but my mind was going crazy. After I calmed down, it didn't take long for Brittany to doze off. I was fine with that, though, since my realization had me wanting some time to think.
Love? Do I really feel that? It's been like, what, a month? But I know that's not why it's scary. Yeah, I haven't known her long. But what everyone used to tell me was right; when you know, you know. And I know.
The way I felt in her arms last night, I've never felt that way. Ever. Not about anything or anyone. Nothing has given me that feeling, and I can't think of anything that would give me anything close to that. Except for her. It sounds crazy, and maybe that's why I couldn't sleep. Since when am I that girl. Am I crazy? Am I that teenage girl that swears she's gonna marry her boyfriend who ends up breaking up with her a week after her stupid declaration? God, I hope not. I can't be the only one feeling this, can I?
I decide I'm not crazy, but I can't tell if it's only for my sanity. Either way, sleeping was still difficult.
Between trying to grasp the concept of actually feeling something real for someone, and trying to figure out what I'm gonna do about my father, I couldn't shut my mind off. Brittany's steady heartbeat was the only thing that could calm me.
"How are you feeling?" Brittany asks.
"Better," I shrug, but I know my voice isn't convincing her. She keeps her lips pressed to my hair as her hand smooths up and down my arm.
"Your skin is so soft," Brittany whispers as her hand explores my arm some more. She is radiating heat and I want her to never stop touching me.
"I just wanna stay in bed all day," I say, snuggling deeper into her chest.
"We can," she says quickly.
"No," I smile. "You have class," I remind her, looking up at her messy blonde hair.
"I don't have to go," she whines.
"Brit," I laugh. "We can stay in bed another day. Plus, we're meeting Kurt for lunch, remember? So we'll only be apart for a little."
Brittany sighs, and as much as I want to stay in bed with her all day, I really don't wanna be the reason she misses a class. If she misses something big, I don't want her to feel any sort of resentment towards me.
"Okay," she mutters. I extend my neck far enough so I can take her lips in mine. It's a soft kiss, but it chills my spine. After I pull away, I lean in immediately, craving her taste again. I give her another soft kiss, her thinner bottom lip in between mine. As I pull away, Brittany lets out a soft hum. I smile up at her. As I'm about to lay my head back down on her chest, Brittany's arms wrap around my neck and she pulls my lips back against hers. She kisses me, still tender like before, but a little harder, too. Her hands slide down my sides, under the covers, until they land on my ass. She uses her hands to turn me so I'm completely on top of her stomach, and she lifts but up her body a little. I spread my legs so I'm straddling her waist and Brittany's hands return to my face. Her fingers run through my hair as her kisses get longer and harder. As my muscles start to clench a little, I press my center against her waist. I feel her smile against me as she readjusts our lips. I let my hand cup her neck and I suddenly want to taste that too. I pull my lips away from hers and drag them to her neck. As soon as I touch her skin, she throws her head back and allows me more room. But only for a second. Then her waist lifts up and I feel myself being rocked onto my back. Before I know it, Brittany is on top of me, giggling like a child. But she sure as hell doesn't look like a child. Even after just waking up, she looks hot. The kind that makes me want her immediately. I pull her down onto me as she adjusts her legs over me, similar to the way I had been on her. She kisses me again, and my stomach flips. She's rocking a lot, too. Way more than I was. Her body is moving up and down mine. My hands shoot down to her hips and I help them rock more. My fingers begin to tug at the waistband of her underwear when the sound of the door being shoved open makes us both jump.
"Oh my God," Quinn's voice booms. "I'm so sorry!" She says. Brittany and I look up at Quinn, who turned her back to us and is covering her eyes with her hands.
"I- I didn't know Brittany was still here, I- I'm sorry, I just wanted to check on you," she stammers. "I'll come back! Sorry!"
I don't know why, but I start giggling. Maybe I should be embarrassed or something, but in reality, Quinn seems way more embarrassed than either of us.
"It's okay," I laugh, trying to stop Quinn. But she's already gone.
"I'm sorry," Brittany breaths. We're both breathing pretty heavily.
"Don't be," I smile, giving her another kiss. I can tell she's taken aback a little, but she kisses me back.
"What time is it anyway?" I ask, looking over to Brittany's phone. "You should get going," I say, remembering her alarm just went off.
Brittany sighs, but I think she knows she's gonna lose the argument, so she stands up and finds her clothes from last night. She begins to change, and she doesn't bother turning around. When she pulls her shirt over her head and she doesn't have her bra on, my stomach twitches.
"Tease," I mutter with a giggle.
"What, like you sleep with a bra on?" I shrug, realizing she has a point. I sit on the edge of the bed, waiting for Brittany to finish getting changed. Her body is so perfect. She clips her bra on and walks over to me. She straddles my legs again and sits on my lap, gently placing her arms around my neck.
"I'm not trying to be a tease," she says, pressing her forehead against mine. As hot as this is, I can't help but laugh.
"What?" she says.
"Then what do you think you're doing right now?" I joke, giving her a soft kiss.
"I'm not a tease if I'm giving you what you want," she smirks. My hands slide down her bare back.
"True," I say, "but not right now. You have to leave."
"I don't have to," she smirks again. I feel like I'm catching onto her plan.
"Brit," I groan.
"Okay, okay," she laughs. "You're right. I have to go to class."
She hops off of me, pulls on her shirt, and I walk her to the door.
"I'll text you the address for lunch," I say as she pulls me into a hug. "Thanks again for last night," I say.
"Anytime," she smiles. "Sorry again about Quinn," she says, whispering her name.
"Brit, it's fine," I laugh. I'm not sure why exactly it's fine, but I take it as a good sign. A sign that I'm way more ready to be open than I thought. Well, at least with my friends. It's a step.
"Bye," I smile, giving her a quick kiss.
"Bye-bye," she smiles, closing the door behind her.
I think about changing before I walk into Quinn's room, but I decide I'm being silly. I knock lightly before pushing the door open.
"That's what knocking sounds like," I joke. Quinn's face reddens again and she immediately begins apologizing.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't know she was here!"
"Q, it's okay," I laugh, walking over to sit on her bed. She's leaning against her headboard and I sit cross legged across from her. "Sorry you had to see that," I shrug.
"No!" Quinn quickly interjects. "It's fine- I mean it's your room. You should be able to do whatever you want," she says.
"Or whoever," I joke, trying to ease the tension. She laughs and we both relax.
"How are you?" Quinn asks once we both calm down.
"Confused," I shrug. Quinn stays quiet as she tries to read my face. But my face stays frozen. People used to tell me I was hard to read, but Quinn's always been really good at it.
"What happened?" she asks.
"Was it hard losing your Dad?" I ask her, ignoring her question.
"Hardest thing I've ever done," she says, and I swear it feels like a knife is lodged in my chest. "But," she says, "it was also one of the easiest. If that makes any sense."
"No," I quickly say, because it doesn't. Quinn lets out a breathy laugh.
"It killed me to lose my Dad. Well, it killed me to lose who the person I thought he was. It killed me to know that my own father would actually disown me for any reason. I wanted him in my life so badly. I would have done anything for him to accept me. But then when I gave the baby up, and the 'problem' was gone, he was ready to love me again. I didn't realize it till then, but I'm so glad I did."
"Realize what?" I ask after Quinn stops talking.
"That I didn't want someone in my life that didn't love me unconditionally. I have so many people that will love me unconditionally, I don't need someone who doesn't filling up space."
"Even family?" I ask, my voice starting to sound weaker.
"Blood is thick," she says, "but blood doesn't make you family."
Quinn's words give me chills, and I'm pretty sure I'm about to cry. But I've cried enough recently so I do my best to hold the tears back.
"Yeah, thanks," I say.
"So what happened?" Quinn asks again. I take a deep breath before I start to explain.
"Well after what you said last night, I really wanted to tell my Dad. You know, about me and Brittany. This way, Gabriella wouldn't have anything over me. And then, he'd either accept me or not. But I could get past it and be happy."
"Yes!" Quinn says, clearly proud of me.
"But then I called my Mom." I don't bother explaining that my Mom would be okay with me and Brittany, because Quinn has known my Mom forever. "And she- she kind of reminded me that my Dad is splitting tuition with her. And if I ruin my relationship with my Dad, there's no doubt in my mind that he'll stop paying. And that screws my Mom. She doesn't deserve that," I say with a strained voice.
"Neither do you," Quinn says.
"What am I supposed to do?" I beg Quinn for some sort of answer. For the first time in awhile, Quinn looks stumped.
"Why is life so complicated," I groan. Quinn tries to smile at me, but I can see her deep in thought.
"It's gonna work out," she says softly. "What about Gabriella?"
"She hasn't called me back yet," I tell her.
"If she does, stall for as long as you can. Give yourself a couple of days. I have a few ideas. Precautions, I guess."
"Like what?"
"Don't you have lunch with Kurt today?"
"Yeah," I roll my eyes a little. I'm not mad, though. I like Kurt. I just know he's gonna be fangirling the entire lunch.
"Go get ready for that. You can meet me after and I'll show you what I'm thinking." I look at her, a little curious and concerned.
"Go!" she smiles. "Have fun!"
"Thanks," laugh, giving Quinn a hug before I leave. "You're the best."
"Love you," she smiles.
"You too."
XxxxxxxxxxxX
"There she is," Kurt opens his arms when he sees me. I try to act annoyed, but I can't fight the smile from my face.
"Hey Hummel," I laugh, hugging him.
"Where's Brittany?" he asks.
"She's meeting us here," I smile, thinking about her. "She had class."
"Good," he says as he grabs the door for me. "I have some questions for her," he smirks.
I roll my eyes as the hostess seats us in the back booth. The other half of the restaurant is overflowing with people, so we're the second group to be put in this room, making us pretty isolated.
"This place reminds me of Breadstix, that's why I picked it."
"I guess," I shrug. "Nothing compares though." Still, I appreciate Kurt trying to make me happy.
"I know," he laughs. "But their breadsticks are pretty good."
The waitress comes over with two waters and we tell her a third is going to be joining us and she leaves to grab another water.
"Where's Blaine?" I ask, suddenly realizing his other half isn't here.
"He's meeting with his college advisor for next year, trying to figure out a schedule."
"Is he excited?"
"I think so," Kurt smiles.
"Hello!" Brittany sings as she enters the room. My face lights up as she slides into the booth next to me.
"Hi Kurt," she smiles. Then she turns to me and, without thinking, plants a quick kiss on my lips. By the time she pulls away, I'm red in the face.
"I thought you were joking," Kurt says as he shakes his head. "I mean, when you first said it, I thought you were making some big joke."
"Nope," I shrug, pointing to me. "Gay."
Kurt and Brittany laugh a little.
"How? When? I just, have you been dating girls for awhile?"
I nudge my shoulder into Brittany's. "She's my first," I smile.
"Have you known?"
I explain the same thing I've been explaining to everyone once more. I tell him about Rachel figuring it out and he feigns pissed.
"How did that hell did she figure it out? I just thought you were a bitch,"
"I am," I laugh. Kurt laughs too but immediately begins questioning me again.
"So when you met Brittany, you knew for sure?"
Part of me is nervous to answer this question because I'm worried about revealing more than I should. I've been honest with Brittany and upfront about everything, but I don't wanna say something I haven't told her yet.
"I mean, I don't think I knew exactly what I was feeling was what I was feeling, but it didn't take long to figure out."
Kurt's literally swooning over us, and as I finish my sentence, Brittany slips her hand into mine. The waitress brings the third water and some breadsticks.
"When did you know?"
"I was attracted to her right away," I say. "Have you seen her dance?"
Kurt laughs. "Even I was attracted to her." Brittany blushes, but it's true.
"Then when we watched the O.C.," I say to Brittany. The conversation has changed to me talking to her. "When we cuddled. And then when I saw you cry," I say, referring to the anniversary of her Mom's passing, "I wanted to protect you so badly. Then when we kissed," I shrug, "no matter how drunk you were, that sealed it for me."
I forget Kurt is there until he squeals.
"Oh my gosh."
"Shut up," I laugh, realizing how sappy I'm being. I'm gonna change the subject when Kurt asks Brittany. I kind of want to hear this.
"What about you? When did you know?"
"Pretty similar," she shrugs, like this is no big deal to talk about. "I was attracted to her from the beginning. She's fun to dance with," she smiles at me. "But when I was a wreck, she stayed with me that night. Nobody I know would have done that." The way she says it is so simple. Like that's all she needed. But it shows that she actually likes me because of me.
"Then when we were watching the O.C. after Rachel left to go see Finn, I couldn't stop myself from kissing you. That's all I wanted to do. And when I did, and you kissed me back, I knew. When you sang Hesitate, though, that just confirmed that I wasn't crazy," she laughs.
Brittany's blushing now, and I can't stop myself from giving her a quick kiss. She just looks so fricking cute.
"This is too much," Kurt cheers. Brittany laughs. "I just can't believe it. You. Brittany. You!"
"We get it, I'm gay."
"Not even that," he laughs. "You finally found it."
"Found what?"
"The person that makes you you." I arch my eyebrow at him, but I know exactly what he means. Kurt's Blaine. Quinn's Puck.
"Gay or not, you're happy. And you weren't like this before."
I smile, knowing how right he is. Brittany's hand squeezes mine under the table.
The waitress comes over and the three of us order a brick oven pizza, not sure what else we want.
"Have you told your parents?"
We both shake our heads.
"My Dad will be okay," Brittany explains, "Just waiting for the right time."
"Same with my Mom," I explain. Kurt nods in recognition. He knows my Dad is conservative, so he drops the topic.
"So are you just gonna be open in the meantime?"
Brittany looks to me for the answer.
"I- I guess," I shrug, looking at her. "I'm done with hiding," I say. "I mean PDA has never been my thing in really public places, straight or gay," I add. "But I'm gonna do what I wanna. And what Brit wants too, obviously," I smile. Brittany nods and returns my smile.
"We can double now! Gay nights!"
"Absolutely not," I interject when him and Brittany start clapping.
"Please," Brittany pouts. Then she leans in and whispers, "we can have sweet lady kisses."
"We can do that alone, too," I say. "And more," I add. Brittany giggles, but she keeps her pout.
"Fine, we can do something sometime."
"Yay!" They both cheer.
Our waitress brings our pizza and we start eating. After I finish my slice, I excuse myself to the bathroom. I had to pee when I got here but didn't wanna make Kurt wait alone.
I'm glad I came. Sometimes I need the comic relief Kurt brings. And he's someone good to talk to about whatever I'm going through right now, since he went through it himself. And I know he's excited, so I'm trying to humor him a little. Especially since I wasn't always an angel to him in high school.
When I get back, I catch them in the middle of conversation.
"Yes, she's so good," Brittany smiles.
"Good at what?" I ask, sliding in. Brittany heats up again and Kurt begins to giggle. "What are you talking about?"
"Your lips," Kurt smirks.
"Brit!" I squeal, playfully hitting her arm.
"Not like- no," she shakes her head. "We're just talking about kissing!" Now my face is burning, and Kurt's jaw drops. I knew that's what she meant, but now Brittany just put more ideas into everyone's heads.
"What!" Kurt squeals.
"No!" I quickly defend. "It's not like that," I say.
"It's not?" Kurt says, suddenly a little more serious. "You don't...?"
"Kurt!" I scold.
"Sorry," he says quietly, realizing he crossed a line. I look over at Brittany, and I can't tell if she's one hundred percent sure what's going on. Part of me hopes she doesn't.
A silence takes over us and I feel the need to ease the tension.
"So you think I'm a good kisser, huh?" I joke.
"Duh," she smiles.
"You're not so bad yourself."
We finish our meal and Kurt gets the check, saying this is a celebration, and I'm definitely not gonna argue with that. We walk out together and Kurt gives us both a hug.
"Seriously, though, I'm really happy for both of you. And if you ever need to talk, please, I'm here."
"Thanks Kurt," I say. He leans in closer and whispers, "and if you ever need to talk about that other thing, I'm here too."
I look up at him, trying to figure out what he means. He raises his eyebrows at me a few times and I suddenly realize he's talking about our lady sex.
"Kurt!" I whisper yell.
"Sorry! I'm just saying!" At this point, I can't help but laugh.
"Bye," we both say as he turns the other way.
"He's funny," Brittany laughs as we walk down the street.
"Yeah," I agree.
"Where are we going?" she asks.
"Well, Quinn actually has some plan she's working on. She's trying to help me with this whole Dad/Gabriella mess."
"Oh, good! I was trying to think of something all day," she admits.
"Me too," I shrug. "Quinn's pretty smart though, so we'll see."
We walk towards the coffee shop near the main NYU buildings. Quinn said to meet there.
"What was Kurt talking about?" Brittany finally asks, like it's been weighing on her mind all day.
"Huh?" I ask.
"When I said we were only talking about kissing, he said something, and you got all mad at him."
"I wasn't really mad," I say.
"Well yeah, I know that, but what did he mean?"
I stare at her for awhile until I realize that whole thing really went over her head.
"He- he was talking about sex," I explain. Brittany's eyebrows crease.
"Wait, what did you think?" I ask.
"Well I knew it had to do with that, but when he told you we were talking about lips, I didn't want you to think we were talking about your, you know."
"Ohhhh," I say, understanding a little more. Then I giggle a little.
"Well when I said 'it's not like that', did you get that?" She shakes her head. "I thought, that you and Kurt meant, like me, kissing," I say, unsure of how to say this delicately. "Me kissing you, down there."
Brittany's eyes narrow. I quickly look around the street, suddenly paranoid of talking about this so publicly.
"Wait," I stop when I realize Brittany's confused expression. "Have you- has that never happened to you?"
Embarrassed, Brittany shakes her head no.
"Wait, really? Not even a guy?" I ask.
"Really," she breaths. But she seems confused. Almost like she didn't think that was a real thing.
We turn the corner and I see Quinn waiting for us outside of the coffee shop.
I turn to Brittany and her flustered expression.
"Hey, don't worry about it," I smile. "We'll take care of it," I wink. Her face turns an even darker shade of red, but she gives me the tiniest smile.
XxxxxxxxxxxX
Sorry updates are taking longer! Fall is the busiest time of year for me! Sorry this one is a little shorter, too, but I wanted to get something out for all of those hurting from the Brittana breakup.
Brittana is endgame! Keep your heads up! :)
Anyway, thanks for being amazing! Let me know what you think.
Xoxo
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