Chapter 25- The Talk at the Hot Springs

Kakashi woke up some hours later in a bed. His head hurt and his thing felt funny. It must've been the beer. He looked to the other side of the bed and saw Rin. Yep, it's the beer. He looked to the body on top of Rin. Kotetsu. It was only the beer.

He sat up instantly. "Oh no! Kurenai's gonna kill me! I'm going to kill me! Damnit, how did this happen? What happened?"

Rin woke up, pushed Kotetsu off of her and looked at Kakashi with a happy smile. "That was pleasant."

Kakashi looked horrified. "What happened? Did we have sex! I couldn't have, I was drunk…I thought I passed out." He held his aching head.

"No, we didn't. We did everything but that."

Kakashi tried to think of everything you could do to somebody that was sexual related, but wasn't sex itself.

"If it makes you feel better, I did most of the work. You were halfway out of your mind. I don't know who was worse. You or Kotetsu." Rin said. "At least both of you have big—"

"You mean to tell me you touched my stuff!"

Rin nodded.

"And you gave me a blowjob!"

Rin nodded again. "Among other things. It wasn't difficult since you weren't hairy.

Kakashi cringed. "But it's Kurenai's job! And if she finds out…"

Kotetsu was finally starting to wake up. "Hey, Kakashi man, what happened—why the hell are you naked?"

Rin smiled at the two and starred at their incredibly huge private parts.

Kotetsu gaped at Rin and attempted to cover himself with his hands. "Did you…rape me?" He asked.

"Yeah, and did you know how difficult it was?"

Kotetsu sighed. "Don't you know how risky that was? You could've gotten pregnant from this!"

Kakashi threw his hands up. "It won't be my kid." He said, as he tried to make out exactly what happened. He rubbed his crotch. "Did you bite me?" He asked Rin.

"It was an accident."

Kakashi shook his head. "I'm getting the hell out of here. Kurenai's probably looking all over for me." He got his clothes on and ran out of the room.

Kotetsu sighed. "I can't believe I got raped. I'm a jounin for goodness sakes." He rubbed his head. "And besides, I thought you wanted to rape Kakashi, not me!"

"I was, but it wouldn't be nice since he has a girlfriend already."

In Tsunade's Office…

"Have you seen Kakashi?" Kurenai asked Tsunade.

Tsunade shook her head. "No, I haven't. Have you, Shizune?"

"No, not me either."

Surprisingly, Yamato came in.

"Have you seen Kakashi?" Kurenai asked him.

"No, but Genma told me they were going to the bar to get drunk and celebrate him getting out of the hospital. He's either there or at home passed out."

"Thank you, Yamato." Kurenai left the room in search of Kakashi.

Tsunade smiled at Yamato. "So, you've come back to discuss posing for Playgirl?" She asked.

Yamato sweatdropped. "No, actually, I was just wondering if you had any—"

"Single women for you to date?" Shizune asked excitedly.

He scratched his head. "No, I was just wondering if Tsunade-sama has any missions."

Tsunade smiled. "Oh, there's plenty. There are several D rank missions. Let's see… cleaning my office, taking care of Tonton for a day and lots of others things."

Yamato sighed. "How about S rank missions?"

"There are several of them! You could come over here and give me a lap dance, you could pose for Playgirl, escort for old ladies, get married, have kids—"

"Tsunade-sama, I think I'll just go to the spa and relax." Yamato turned around to leave.

"Be careful, and try not to get raped." Tsunade said as he left.

Yamato sighed. Their Hokage was a closet pervert, and wanted to see at least half of the jounins naked. Including him. It was hard to go into her office and not be scared for your life…and virginity.

20 Minutes Later…

Yamato was at the spa and about to relax into the nice, soothing hot spring, and saw Kakashi fully clothed...

Yeah, he's drunk Yamato thought as he stepped in the other side. "Hey, Kakashi, you know you're in the hot springs, right?"

Kakashi nodded slowly.

"In your clothes."

Kakashi nodded again. "…Trying to get rid of this hangover."

Yamato shook his head. "I thought you didn't drink more than twenty glasses of sake."

"I don't…but that damn woman made me…won't leave me alone till I did it…"

"Then what'd she do?" Yamato asked, but thought he already knew.

Just as Kakashi was going to tell him, a woman came in.

"There you are!" Kurenai sighed. "I was so worried about you."

Kakashi turned around and looked at her. "Oh, hey, Kurenai-chan. I'm a little drunk right now, so could you please come back later?"

Kurenai raised her eyebrow. "I see you're drunk, Kaka-kun…" She sighed. "Yamato-san, will you please make sure Kakashi-kun doesn't do anything…stupid." She asked before leaving.

"Uh…sure." It beat the hell out of those crazy missions Tsunade was suggesting. He waited until Kurenai was out of earshot and asked, "So what exactly happened?"

"Rin almost raped me. She already raped Kotetsu…the poor guy. I think he's getting a restraining order on her."

Yamato sweatdropped. A jounin got raped? Yamato still couldn't believe it. Kotetsu was…raped. And Kakashi would have been next. The again, they were drunk, so that was a legitimate excuse.

"Yo, Yamato, do you think Kurenai will be mad?"

"Mad that you got drunk and a woman basically had her way with you…uh, yeah, she is gonna be pretty mad." Yamato told him. "I'm no expert on women, but they don't let something like that slide."

Kakashi gulped. "If she found out, do you think she would still…marry me?"

"I don't know…she might. I guess it all depends on how much she loves you." Yamato sniffed. "You also smell like sex." He added.

"It must have come from Rin and Kotetsu. I must have been on the bed while they were doing it." Kakashi said.

Yamato nodded. "Hopefully, if Kurenai finds out, she'll understand that you didn't impregnate Rin."

Kakashi laughed softly. "Yeah, and if she tries to pin a baby on me, it's more than likely Kotetsu's."

After he said that, the door slid back, and Kotetsu came in.

He had a deadbeat look about him. He was naked, and walked like a zombie.

Jiraiya, Genma were grinning and coming in behind him.

"Guess what, Kotetsu got some action!" Genma proclaimed and Kotetsu basically fell into the hot springs.

Jiraiya had a glass of sake in his hand. "Wish I was there to see it! I can't believe he got drunk and did something so reckless! I would have at least made sure I was sober enough to enjoy it!" He said proudly as he stepped into the hot springs with Genma.

Kakashi eyed Genma. "How the hell did you get over your drunkenness so soon?"

"I sweet talked one of the nurses." He grinned. "Hey man, why didn't you take your clothes off? It's more enjoyable that way. No girls are here to spy on us."

"Too tired to take my clothes off…" He said lazily.

Out of nowhere, Iruka came in…with Anko!

"Ah, it feels good to be back home in Konoha!" He exclaimed as he dived in the hot springs with Anko right behind him.

Every man in the hot spring tensed. A woman was in their territory. The only place men could get together and hang out in privacy had just been invaded!

Jiraiya got a hell of a nosebleed looking at Anko's titties, and the other men averted their eyes to other things.

"Hi, guys." Anko said. They all replied with a very forced, "Hi, Anko-chan." She frowned at that. "What? You all don't like the fact that a woman is in here? You gotta problem with it?"

Jiraiya shook his head. "No, no problem at all." He grinned.

Kakashi and Kotetsu gave her a very lazy look. "Huh?" They both asked her at the same time.

She then realized they were suffering from a hangover. "Damn, Kakashi, you look like a bat up piñata reeking of sex. What have you and Kurenai been doing, lately!"

"You mean what Kotetsu was doing and then got that awful sex stench on me." Kakashi said, looking at Kotetsu drunkenly.

"Hey, man, don't blame it on me. I was unconscious! The woman was basically impregnating herself. I didn't do anything!" He defended.

"And what are you going to do if she gets pregnant?" Jiraiya asked. "I say you break all ties with the woman. What beast would take advantage of a drunken man?"

Kotetsu shook his head. "Even though my mind's blown right now, I still have enough balls to take care of my kid if she gets pregnant."

Kakashi gave him a high five. "That's right." He wobbled up and pointed to Kotetsu. "Ladies and Gentleman, I present to you; a real man."

Everyone in the hot spring clapped except Iruka and Anko.

"So…I guess I've missed quiet a lot since Anko and I were no vacation." Iruka muttered.

Kakashi grinned. "Don't worry, 'Ruka, I'll tell you all about it after my hangover settles down." He said. "I'm going to go find Kurenai and hope she'll give me a massage or something." He left the hot springs with his clothes dripping wet.

Yamato sighed. "I think I'll get out of here, too."

He stood up, and being a woman, Anko couldn't help but look. "Damn, Yamato-san! What's got you so hard!" She asked.

Yamato blushed. "It happens randomly." He said, hurrying out of the hot springs.

"Damn…" Anko watched his ass as he left. "I don't know whose booty is better. His or yours, 'Ruka."

Iruka sighed. "Have you forgotten that we're married?" He asked.

Anko shrugged. "I'm in a tub full of nice looking jounins…I can't help but look."

Iruka sighed again. "It was bad enough that you had to go and write about our sexual adventures…"

Jiraiya's eyes popped out of his head. "Oh really? Is it in detail?" He asked.

Iruka nodded. "Yeah, but it's from her point of view."

Jiraiya immediately looked disinterested. "Never mind. I forgot girl porn existed."