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So this is it!

No Rest For The Wicked!

(And no, this isn't the last chapter. Neither is the next one.)

Chapter name borrowed from Bon Jovi, of course.

Lyrics borrowed from Sam Cooke.

On with it, shall we?

It's been too hard living, but I'm afraid to die.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE- DEAD OR ALIVE

Thirty hours.

Thirty hours until I landed up doing the hellfire rumba in good ol' damnation eternal.

Funny.

Wonder why I never got the brochure.

Cas had, of course, figured out the Lilith's location, and he looked grimmer than ever.

Which was saying a lot, 'cause the guy almost always looked like somebody'd force-fed him lemon juice, or something.

Odette looked at the map.

"New Harmony, Indiana."

"Alright."

Sam pushed his chair back.

"Let's go."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I got to my feet. "Let's all shut up there, Tex."

Cas eyed me oddly.

(When was that new?)

"What's the problem?"

"What's the problem?" I repeated incredulously.

"Come on, where do I begin? We have no way to gank Lilith, and that's assuming we can even get to her. I mean, even you can't kill her, Angel Boy. What makes you think we can?"

Cas stiffened, but I didn't let him speak.

"And isn't this the same Lilith that wants your giant head on a pike, Sam? Should I continue?"

Bambi's eyes tightened.

"So what are we supposed to do, Dean?"

I sighed, looking at their tense faces.

"Just 'cause I gotta die doesn't mean you have to, okay? Either we go in smart, or we don't go in at all."

"Okay, fine," Sam glared at me. "If that's the case, I have the answer."

I raised an eyebrow.

"You do?"

Sam crossed his arms.

"Yeah. A surefire way to confirm it's Lilith and a way to get us a bona fide demon-killing ginsu."

I realized what he was planning to do with a curse.

"Damn it, Sam, no."

I turned my back on him, walking forward a few steps.

I could feel Sam's scowl.

"We're so past arguing. Dean, I am summoning Ruby."

That did it.

"The hell you are! We have enough problems as it is!"

"Exactly," Sam said pointedly.

"And we've got no time, and no choice either."

I gritted my teeth together.

"Come on, man, she is the Miss Universe of lying skanks, okay? She told you that she could save me, huh-lie. She seems to know everything about Lilith but forgot to mention, oh, right, Lilith owns my soul!"

Sam glowered at me.

"Okay, fine, she's a liar. She's still got that knife."

"Dean," Cas said quietly.

"For all we know, she works for Lilith," I pointed out.

Odette caught my arm.

"Then give us another option, Dean. Tell me what else."

I couldn't look her in the eyes.

"They're right," Cas offered unexpectedly.

I gaped at him.

He'd been acting weird all week, and that was saying a lot for the Holy Tax Accountant.

I mean, he hated Ruby's guts almost as much as I did.

And he'd promised me he'd take care of Sam and Odette!

"Damn it! NO!"

They looked up at me, surprised.

I pinched the bridge of my nose, breathing out heavily.

"Just no. We are not gonna make the same mistakes all over again."

I set my jaw.

"You guys wanna save me, find something else."

Cas stood up, opening the door roughly.

Bambi ran up to him.

"Where are you going, Cas?"

Cas stared at me searchingly.

"To find something else."

He disappeared.

~Supernatural~

I bided my time, listening to Ruby speak quietly, clapping a hand over Bambi's mouth.

"You don't like being different. You hate the way Dean looks at you sometimes. Like you're some kind of sideshow freak. But suck it up, because we've got a lot of ground to cover, and we've gotta do it fast."

Sam clenched his jaw, and I swore under my breath.

Manipulative little bitch.

Odette moved forward, but I stopped her as Ruby continued.

"Look. Call me a bitch, hate me all you want, but I've never lied to you, Sam. Not ever. And I'm telling you. You...can save your brother, and I can show you how."

I'd had about enough.

"So that's you, huh? Our slutty little Yoda."

"Dean."

She turned around, not looking too happy.

"Charming as ever."

I walked ahead, and Bambi stared at Ruby doubtfully.

"Aw, I knew you'd show up. Because I knew Sam wouldn't listen."

Sam looked up at me, but shifted his gaze quickly.

"But you're not gonna teach him anything, you understand me?"

I glared at her.

"Over my dead body."

"Oh," Ruby sneered. "Well, you're right about that."

"What you are gonna do," I said slowly.

"Is give me that knife. And then you can just crawl back into whatever slop you came from and never bother us again. Are we clear?"

"Your brother," Ruby hissed. "Is carrying a bomb inside of him and we'd be stupid not to use it."

"And her."

Odette squeaked as Ruby pulled on her arm.

"She has the juice to kill Lilith too. They both do."

Sam opened his mouth.

"Dean, look, just hold on for one-"

"Don't!" I snapped. "Come on, man, what, are you blind? Can't you see this is a trick?"

"That's not true," Ruby retorted.

I ignored her.

"She wants you to give into this whole demonic pyschic whatever, okay? I mean hell, she probably wants you to become her little anti-Christ superstar."

Ruby scowled at me.

"I want Lilith dead. That's all."

"Why?" I demanded.

"I've told you why!" She yelled back.

"Oh, right, yeah," I smiled mockingly.

"Because you were human once and you liked kittens and long walks on the beach."

Ruby and I were literally nose-to-nose.

"You know, I am so sick of proving myself to you," She growled.

"You wanna save yourself, this is how, you dumb spineless dick!"

I punched her in the face.

Odette tried to pull me back as we really started fighting, but I pushed her away.

I had what I wanted.

She headbutted me viciously, and I rolled onto the floor, shooting her a grin.

"The hell are you grinning at?" Ruby snarled.

I pulled up her knife.

"Missing something?"

Ruby's eyes narrowed to slits.

"I'll kill you, you son of a bitch."

She rushed toward me, then abruptly came to a stop as she landed under the devil's trap.

"Like I said," I put down the knife.

"I knew you'd come."

~Supernatural~

Sam sighed as he cleaned his gun.

"We're just gonna let Ruby rot down there?"

I nodded.

"That's the idea."

"Dean..." Sam fidgeted uncomfortably.

"What if..uh...what if Ruby's right? What if I can take out Lilith?"

I glowered at him.

Odette turned to me.

"You heard Ruby. We both could. Maybe..."

That did it.

I banged my hands down on the table.

"All right, that's it, guys, you know this as well as I do. You, me, Bambi, we're all each other's weak spots. The demons know it too. And we've got to stop spreading it for them, stop being martyrs."

I held up Ruby's knife.

"We take this knife, and we go after Lilith our way. The way Dad taught us to. And if we go down...then we go down swinging."

Truthfully, I was terrified.

I was going to hell in less than a day, and I was freaked.

But I had my family to look after, and if I had to go down, I'd go down protecting them.

Even if it was the last thing I ever did.