I Am Chapter 24, a naruto fanfic

eries: Naruto
Setting: AU
Rating: M (Was NC-17)
Warnings: Language, Drug Use, Sexual Content
Summary: Sorted feelings between the two brings them closer together, giving into what has been building for three years.

Bonus Writer's Notes: This chapter has been edited due to sex scene. The only place you can see the entire thing is at my writing journal which is on my profile page.

I Am... Chapter 24

The rain had never looked to melancholy. Kids would love to play in it, lovers would nuzzled up to each other cuddling in front of a warm fire reminiscing about their past together watching the dancing flames of the open burning logs. Mothers would bring hot chocolate and popcorn calling families together for a movie night spending the time as one. But he hated it. The gloomy grey skies spewing water onto unsuspecting people that scurried for cover, shielding their head with newspapers and long collared jackets, dashing to their cars to make it before they were drenched. Hours spent walking from the middle of nowhere back to the place where they had called home, aching feet with only one determination to keep him going.

A hand pressed against the cold glass staring down at the pools forming stories below, slumping his forehead against the panel closing his eyes biting his lip hard waiting for him to say something to him. Any moment he would wake up from this dream and everything would be fine, a time paradox that was vividly acted out in his mind seeming like reality, waking up soaking in cold sweat has he had been prior but a glance over at the battered body in the large bed reminded him that it wasn't. This was crueler than a nightmare, this was hell.

"He will be fine" The doctor assertively spoke sure of his diagnosis. Pulling the sheet up over his near naked clad body, he tucked Deidara in for the night allowing him to get the rest that his body deserved. "He might be in a bit of pain from all the bruising over his body but it doesn't look like there are any cracked bones and I just don't have the facilities here to test for internal bleeding but just from his look alone…" A soft smile taking his seat down at the table away from the nervous brunette shadowing over them from the side of the room, taking a sip from the glass of water he had brought him earlier. "He is recovering"

Just hearing that confirmation of health was like a weight of his chest that constricted him for the entire time he had been standing around, waiting for him to arrive, worried that this time it was going to be something that the blonde could not recover from and he would have been the one responsible for it. No one else but him, caught on the hook of his family issues and dragged into shore left dangling gasping for air out of place in the open air. He should have been on the side of that hook, not Deidara.

"What about the drugs?" Itachi asked quietly rubbing his temples in circles with the questioning not yet fully finished. It was not just the beating but that mass of narcotics forced into his veins that he rejected, not knowing exactly how much was too much but with the way he had been unconscious for near on 20 hours, it must have been too much. Shit he had gotten him in too deep. If anything was to happen to him then… he did not know what he would do.

A firm but caring hand tapped him on the shoulder grabbing his attention, motioning a hand to guide him back to the table so they could speak face to face instead of at his back, cradling his head away from the doctor, showing of his weary eyes between the gap of his arm that were met with concerned smile. "He has been through a lot. He is not in any danger, sleeping it off is all that he can do" Deidara was going to be all right, he was a fighter but he just had to sink that into his head instead of wallowing in pity except for now he felt so useless.

The doctor however wanted to turn the table of talk not only to get the Uchiha's mind off what had happened but he too had suffered a great deal, he hadn't looked to be coping too well. "How is your memory coming along?"

"Patchy still but more there than there was before" Itachi replied rubbing his temples. Whenever he thought about it, it hurt. Like someone crushing his skull pressing into the delicate skin covering the fragile dips on his head, the toll it took on his body when something came back was painful. Nothing ever good came out of it only dragging in the hurt, those very few pieces where he felt happy, content, unable to shine through over shadowed by demons. He didn't want to remember anymore. He wanted to make new memories.

"Is that why you are not sleeping?"

Was it that obvious to everyone? The deep sunken darkened hollows under his eyes, the bony facial structure standing out more from malnutrition and exhaustion, the paler then usual skin. The more he looked at his reflection staring back at him on the glass top surface it made perfect sense. He was a wreck and he couldn't even see it. "My dreams… I just don't want to see anymore" He couldn't help but shake his head at himself for his attitude, too afraid to sleep like a child that thought the boogeyman was coming to take him in his visit to the sandman. Every time his eyes rest more came back, unrelenting, worse than before until he thought he was losing his sanity but maybe he was. Itachi couldn't tell what anything was anymore.

A suggestion from the older man brought him to his feet over to the small kitchenette boiling the kettle telling him that a good cup of tea and a lie down would relax him even if he didn't sleep, just enough to take the edge off the restlessness and give his thoughts a well needed break. Concurrence from the exhausted male, getting up for a brief toilet break was just the opportunity that was needed, mixed between the sugar in the coffee mug mixed through three crushed up tablets masked with the pungent aroma of the cheap tea leaves. By the time he returned the man was sitting at the table stirring the pleasantly warm liquid pushing forth a packet of chocolate biscuits that he had brought along with him. He had been on the way home from shopping when he got the call in the mid of the day looking for a personal favour for the only person he could trust. It was comforting that after all he had withheld from him, Itachi still considered him trustworthy although he didn't know the truth, this would be his own retribution to him in tending to his fallen comrade.

Sipping his own drink that was not at all laced with the unidentified substance, he put the cup back down on the table making small conversation as normal, just like it was a casual gathering for gossip. "When he wake up, if he had any pain give him two of these" he nodded handing Itachi the orange labeled bottle of pills, some kind of heavy dosage pain killer to help with the aches.

Only a nod in reply while he continued to drink the rest of his tea, nibbling on the chocolate biscuit to get rid of the bitter taste in his mouth that reminded him of the first time he had tasted green tea. To a child it was terrible on the buds and chocolate was given to satisfy the palette, the same effect again from the aftertaste it was leaving behind. Once finished it was the end of their meeting, the doctor getting up and pushing his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose, collecting the rest of his equipment placed into his medical bad, hanging it over his shoulder.

"Itachi, you should get out while you can. You are getting in too deep" he told him, looking over his shoulder with the door partly cracked open. "How long do you think it's going to take until one of you die"

It would have been lying to say that he had not gave it some thought, Deidara stating towards his brother that he was the only reason that he was in this treacherous game but now the motive had vanished. He had turned away from him seeking for love from someone else not wanting to know about him at all now; the driving force had abandoned him leaving nothing behind.

"Maybe you're right" Itachi mumbled his reply with a bow of his head for the concern he displayed. But there was one thing left for him now and even that could be a lost cause especially if he didn't want to return.

The door clicked shut leaving the two alone once again, this time the silence was eating at him. He was waiting for Deidara to wake up and say a sleepy hello grumbling in question for the time and complaining that it was too early and that he was going to go back to sleep. Only that he wasn't going to be saying anything for a while, dead to the world in an unconscious slumber without even revealing a clue to when he was going to surface.

All he wanted to do was say how sorry he was to him over and over again, almost hearing his voice inside his head telling him that it wasn't his fault and not to worry about it. Still how could it not be? "I really had fun the other night" he spoke quietly stroking his cheek. "Have I thanked you for being at my side all this time? I don't know if I have yet but thank you" Words were so much easier when they weren't actively heard for him, so much he wanted to tell him, explain the turmoil that was inside of him, that strange feeling he had around him. It had been there for such a long time that only developed into something stronger, a shielding hold over him to shield him away just like he had his brother only that he had been protecting the wrong things. Maybe it was smothering them, what he thought was good was only bad. Crazy things were done under emotions and he had no idea if any of them were correct. They mustn't have been because he was there looking like shit.

Blinking a few times Itachi began to see the colours of purple blend into the creamy white, staring harder again at the blurs started to come together and then move apart feeling light headed needing to rest he his head on his hand. Whoa that felt a little weird. Tired eyes went from a gradual progression of heaviness to an instant downfall struggling against the weight to stay open, shuffling down onto the mattress next to the quiescent blonde finding it hard to fight off the unnatural urge for sleep. He knew he had been tired only not to that extent.

Gentle sound of the angled rain pattered against the window washing a calmness over him, closing his eyes listening to the soothing sounds not even jumping at the rumbling of thunder off in the distance. The storm was only going to get worse with the direction it was heading but for now it was the sweetest lullaby he could hope for. His body reacted to the sound even though it was not chilly inside; Itachi still rolled over onto his side and wriggled closer to the covered body heat breathing rhythmically against his shoulder. There had been no thoughts of this being brought on by chemical means except his body was thanking it for the relief of strain, the mind finally shutting down forgetting about everything he was running from. Crimson eyes slipped open one last time gazing up at the blonde for one last time, wanting that image in his mind while he rested, wanting to see that very same when he woke up. "Don't let me sleep too long" he mumbled but soon after finishing he was dead to the world sleeping deeply.

The outskirts weren't the only place struck by the bad weather, even if the city things had gotten hairy with the onslaught of the downpour causing people to huddle under the sidewalks with their umbrellas up high shielding their expensive suits from the elements that would only ruin the dry clean only material. The older generation where thanking the god for spilling the life into the earth allowing the waterways to fill up, mid ages were cursing that their plans were ruining by the filthy weather that should have only shown itself during the winter months and the youngsters ran out wild and free without a care that they were being sprinkled on. It was only water so it wouldn't harm them but the adults were acting like it was acid rain.

It was certainly getting a mixed reaction from the masses but from one it caused him to huff, sprinting from his car, jacket pulled up high over his ears wanting to hide his dark navy hair before it became a flat mess taking a mad dash through the people to make it into the building relatively dry. By the time he made it through the doors it had only been a fruitless effort dripping wet, soaked down to the very thin tank top underneath shuffling awkwardly from the feeling that he had urinated on himself except it was just water trickling from his jocks and down his legs. If he got sick from this then he would be making sure that his escalating medical bills would be passed on.

Taking his jacket off and wringing out the water into puddles on the ground, the tall man shook the excess out into the elevator without a care for the next person's safety that step in, stepping over the puddle into the neatly laid out office at least this time making in there in one piece without something sticking out of body parts. They were going to take a couple of weeks more to fully heal but other than that he was walking around fine, a bit painful to sit down but yet operational once again.

"You are getting water on my carpet" grumbled the flaming haired man with his profound irritated voice.

Taking a step closer to him he lingered around a fateful space allowing the water to soak into his well taken care of carpet leaving behind water damage in his place. "At least it's cleaning the blood stains for you" Kisame sneered shaking himself off like a dog cleaning its coat, spraying mist across the room.

The sediment was not appreciated picking up his paperwork air drying it making sure the ink did not run on the documentation he had prepared, filing them away not for his subordinate eyes. It was bad enough that he was leaking liquid all over his floor but as the puddle footsteps walked towards the chair in front of the desk his finger raised warning him before the giant could take action. "Don't sit…" Too late. Eh that was going to be coming off his next bonus. That wasn't any cheap material that you would pick up from a common furniture store, which was worth more than he could make in a month. A huff showing him that he was irritated by the blatant ignorance but that was short lived because there was something certainly more important to discuss.

Flipping through files in his manila folders humming quietly to himself sorting through the load of cases that were open for jumpers, the one he needed in particular was found ripping it out and placing it down onto the desk holding his hand across the front not allowing it to be opened until he had agreement on this. "This case requires your upmost discretion" He gave him forewarning not willing to open it up until he had his total agreement.

Lucky for him Kisame was one of the best people to entrust with something like this, years working through military handling national secrets, keeping the transgression of big named superstars under the rug so their dirty business was not aired by the paparazzi was done on a day to day basis. This would be a walk in the park compared to all of those. "You know that's going to happen, how long have I worked for you now? Just tell me" he grumbled at the secrecy that he was displaying. Nothing he could have thrown at him could waver him.

He knew he could depend on him; Kisame was always the most trustworthy of everyone he had working for him even most so of the ones of the past despite his shady looking appearance. He was the solid foundation that held Akatsuki together after the first left, after the death of Sasori, going through the whirlwind of puberty with two teenage boys and the mindless nature of a computer genius. Without him, the foundation would have crumbled bringing them to an end.

Pushing the file closer to the bulky male he left if there for him to read, leaning back into his seat to await the reaction, ready to ask any questions he might have thrown at him which he knew there was going to be some. This wasn't a simple case to which he thought Kisame had his own suspicions as well from the brief conversations over the phone, the subject have been momentarily touched on. But right there in his hand laid the answers for all that he has been seeking, the confirmation that he wanted. The person who was responsible for the attempt on their lives.

Golden tightened pupils flared momentarily laying his sights on the villain for a split second, returning back to a calm state after the confirmation, turning through the pages examining the collected information nodding to himself with self questions. Most of this stuff he knew with the detailed file that had been collected, not only was it common knowledge but from personal experience in dealing with the suspect. Everything came together in a nice neat little package then bundled in a bow presented just waiting to have the wrapping torn off to get to the present inside. That bastard who was after them.

"Itachi and Deidara are still out. Do you want me to bring them back in?" Kisame asked, still with an eye on the documents.

Granted this was not going to be an easy feat with just the minimal staff they had on hand at that moment, those two would be needed to complete this with efficiency. Each skill that they brought would have to be utilized to their full potential, the blonde with his ability to flatten an area within few seconds and the brunette with his tactical knowledge and precision shooting. His team was perfect and now was going to be the time they were going to have to show it.

"I don't think that is recommended" their leader replied, swinging around in his chair that didn't even make a squeak from how new it was.

Kisame could not understand that logic behind that especially since it was him that insisted that Itachi be brought into Akatsuki in the first place, who else would be better for something like this. "Have you…" he started in bewilderment only to be silenced and told to turn further to the back. A few pages flicked through stopping at the one he was instructed to without having to know that was what he was talking about. Surveillance photos from early reconnaissance was stapled to the top of the page courtesy of Tobi who had been informed earlier about this pressing issue, know associates of the felon most of them with criminal profiles accompanying them… all except for one. "I understand but he will not screw up because of this. You know as well as me that without them there is hope chance of getting close to him"

He had the upmost faith in the Uchiha that he would not fail given whatever circumstances; he was not one to let personal feelings cloud his judgment no matter what the situation, firmly focused on all tasks until the very end. He suffered silently without letting anyone know of his problems even when a friendly ear was offered. Justly he was a rare breed except it would be detrimental in the end, how long would it take until he lost control?

Business between the two was short and sweet without the social chit chat afterwards in catching up, each keeping their personal lives separate from each other since they were only employer and employee even after the time spent together so this was the time for Kisame to bow out. Standing to his feet with the folder tightly held in his possession he started to leave, stopped by a stiff cough that spun him around on the spot tapping his foot with a dire need to get back and change. This was only slowing that down.

"There is something else I want you to do"

Something else? Hmmm what else was there that he could want him to possibly do?

Darkness of shadows all around was all that he had woken up to in the early hours in the morning, might have been morning could have been night but either way it was hard to see between blinking of eyelids scanning the room to see where he was. The familiar lamp to his left helped clear things up as well as the soft breathing to his right, rolling his head to the side catching the dark feathered hair across the tan features that was softened by the act of sleep. Actually he was surprised to see him in that state beside him especially given his fight to deprive himself of it, not even a whimper or a toss and turn, as peaceful as a baby utterly exhausted. It was a relief to see him like that so much he didn't want to disturb him allowing him to continue for as long as he was going to sleep, shifting carefully out of the bed dropping the arm that had been draped over him back onto the mattress that instantly responded, tucking under his chin with a incoherent murmur. When he wasn't awake and aware of what he was doing, Itachi could be so adorable but not that he would ever say that to him unless it was to piss him off.

Sliding over to the bed Deidara sat up too fast instantly buckling over in pain clutching his chest whimpering loudly at first but quickly biting his lip to stop the mewls that threatened to wake the sleeping Uchiha from the groans that thankfully settled down back into silence. Shit he felt like a truck and smashed him into a brick wall and then drove back a few more times to crush every bone in his body. Coming out of the sleep he had absent mindedly forgotten about what had happened or maybe he just wanted to remember but his frail body was not allowing him that luxury, groaning loudly as he rose to his feet holding onto the corner table for support. A slow walk towards the bathroom dragging his feet along the ground was all that he could manage, taking himself in for a warm soak under streaming water. That always did good for many injuries he had discovered over the years especially with some of the hard knocks he had, this would at least loosen the muscles up into relaxation instead of instantly tensing.

Stepping inside he instantly slumped against the tiles that shocked his body still warm from the bed with their cold texture but it wasn't enough to move from the spot, slowly looking down at his body that was littered with the rainbow of abuse, scratch marks over his chest that the chick they had seen before left thinking that it would have been entertaining to leave him looking like he was attacked by a wild cat. They must have worked over his body something good because his face wasn't that sore, why attack such a vulnerable place when it would only lead to a hasty unconsciousness. Curious fingers wandered around noting ever point of impact, lazily continuing over his arms to the swollen bruise of his burst vein that he quickly hitched his elbow up to cover the swollen mess. For the first time ever he had not enjoyed the feeling that drugs gave him, the brain numbing high took away the pain but still he could hear his pleas in his head, numbly feeling each fist against him but yet he craved for it now to once again remove that feeling.

He had to thank the instant hot water for the amount of time he had spent in there soaked to the bone standing under the direct spray of water until he started to wrinkle up into a prune, moving out to dry himself off carefully making sure he didn't undo his soothing work, dressing loosely to avoid rubbing and back out into the room. Scanning the room he looked for anything he could find to take the edge off, not wanting anything heavy duty but something that could give him temporarily relief. Just a couple so he could go back to bed and wait for Itachi to rouse.

"Are you looking for this?"

Deidara's hand steadied on the bottle of pain killers than he had found on the table, turning around cocking his head towards Itachi who was now awake but it looked like he barely was. Yet he was still in control of his awakening actions to hold up the bag towards him showing what he might have been looking for normally only this time he had no intentions. "No these are fine, un" he grinned getting a glass of water to wash back to tablets with ease, moving to sit back on the bed next to him.

Even though he was still half asleep he was perplexed on why he wouldn't want something that he brought along with him, not that his arm looked to be in the shape to take anything but he didn't want Deidara suffering for something that should have been for him. Sitting up he handed it over to the blonde anyway, glancing down knowing he didn't want him to use them because no matter what they were deadly and no amount of caution could help when all it could take was one mistake but who was he to stop him?

He didn't know if he should have been weirded out, thankful, angry or a combination of all of them but instead Deidara took the happier road with a chuckle at him, taking the bag he so kindly offered placing it down between his spread legs, opening it up for him. "I don't want to use around you. Before it was different but now I want to spend the time with you as me… straight, un" While he explained it to him, the bag was sorted through and a bandage was found, wrapping up the nasty looking mark from the aggressive use of the needle pushing it away out of sight so no one would have to remember. "In fact I want to show you something"

Rubbing his eyes wiping away the crusty liquid that was partially locked his eyelashes together; Itachi blinked a few times bringing everything back into focus especially since there was something that he was going to be privileged to. His soft hand pressed against his covering up the object he had passed him with the words "Every time I look inside, I see this" as the clarification of it. Tilting his head to the side he looked at the crumpled up photo in his hand, creases removed to the best of its ability but some fractured lines remained, small tears on the side of it from being mistreated, remnants of blood that couldn't be wiped away that sunk into the glossy sheen. It was a picture of them together at some kind of happy bright place, posing together like idiots well Deidara was at least with those childish faces he was making only that it was relaxing him to look at it.

How could he tell him that he didn't remember when something as simple as this made him not want to take drugs? He could only listen to his story about how it was used as a self made intervention, being the reminder that there was more to life especially when it held someone dear to him in it. No matter how much he spoke about it he still didn't think that he was that worthy enough to be held in such a position, flattering to say the least but he had his own problems in life and was far from a role model to anyone but no amount of words spoken could sway his path of thinking.

He couldn't hide it from him despite the attempts to try, the tough wrinkles across his forehead straining had to bring back the past was a clear give away but he didn't mind, it was something that he could share for him without the terrible events that took prior and after. Just that moment would be shared between them. Feeling heavy he rested against the broad shoulders of the older man, tugging on his shirt while he reached over and petted the picture reminded of the trouble he had caused him without thinking about his own actions, the damage of his selfish nature. In the end it only drew them together so was it really bad? Everyone made mistakes and you moved on and learned from them. Some strengthened bonds while others turned away never to look back on what was never meant to be but were they destined for each other? It could have just been the loose nature of the relaxing medication in his blood that said yes, only that he truly believed it. But most of all, he wanted to see that smile upon his beautiful face once again this time so he could admire it.

"Let's have some fun, un" the suddenly perked up blonde proclaimed in merriment. If he wanted to see that then he would have to initiate it.

A scuttle through his bag tossing things to the side brought grumbles that he might have lost it in the junk building up inside the what seemed bottomless, everything he could have possible owned was packed tightly inside that he couldn't find it… or so he thought. "Gotcha!" Flying out of the bag came the black rectangle mp3 player that he had filled with an assortment of music as well as the docking station with speakers so it wouldn't be for his own personal pleasure but for the Uchiha's as well. In leaps and bounds which were not the actions of an injured man, Deidara jumped from the bed and placed the set up device on the kitchen bench powering it up putting it on shuffle to randomly pick something so he wouldn't spend hours fiddling to find something that he wanted to hear.

Pain killers into his body loosened up the muscles with their fast acting response into his blood stream, a little high from the side effects but still it was better than being completely incoherent and giggling which would have been the instant fix. Temptation was hard, withdrawal would be harder but the perplexed Uchiha that followed around his swift movements was in his opinion more than worth it. Who knows, maybe enough to get him off the substance all together but that process would take time, highs and lows of a recovering drug addiction needing a support to help him through it. He would never want to force something that important onto him so time would tell.

"Oh I love this song!" the blonde cheered jumping around in circles making a mad dash towards the table.

Itachi blinked at the sudden shift of pace going from a soft conversation to the abrupt relocation of furniture around the cramped hotel room, table pushed back up towards the door blocking anyone from entering… or escaping. Chair shifted around to the edge of the room leaving a makeshift dance floor in the middle that was Deidara's own personal playground, well a bouncy castle with all his jumping up and down on the spot swinging around something imaginary through the air crying out "wooooooo". His eyes followed it around in circles trying to articulate what it was he would have been using. A rope? Looked like he was trying to capture a bull with the wide sweeping movements that started the Uchiha's head rotating around following it. A sudden stop running around like a frantic headless chicken found the item that he was apparently invisibly using… a tea towel… hmmmm.

"It's supposed to be a towel" Deidara clarified for him which left him none the wiser on why he was vigorous head banging around like he was on crack waving a towel above his head.

Had he really taken something and just didn't say anything about it? His mood was certainly strange even for him; this was something hyperactive, bouncing from left to right singing at the top of his lungs without even getting out of breath. Still he couldn't help but look away feeling embarrassed for him, covering his mouth shaking his head unbelieving on how stupid this was. "Come on, you have never acted like an idiot before?" The lack of response he hoped he took that as a 'no' and that in the same breath he wouldn't be doing it ever. Letting loose acting casual no matter who the company was just wasn't him, he didn't even know how to dance and sure as hell he couldn't sing. Completely tone deaf. However Deidara's voice was a little too deep for the vocals yet he didn't care nor about the headache he would have afterwards from the head banging and moshing on the spot. It was hurting him just to watch it.

Last beats of the song played bringing Deidara's strange gyrating to a grinding halt with his fingers held up in a V posing for him. …Nothing but dead muteness that would have heard crickets chirping outside if it was more of a hot summer's night. Hands rooted into his hips bleak with the lack of response from the audience, not even a clap or a cheer for the performance that he gave. It was certainly a tough crowd tonight but he wasn't going to give up that easily, picking up the iPod from the docking station moving through the tracks until he found something that he might be able to use to win him over. If the insanely addictive and hyper wasn't working then he would take another angle, capturing his confined pony tail pulling the elastic out sweeping his long waves of hair over his shoulders stripping down the hoodie had been wearing to reveal the jade tank top clinging to his chest. Not the most elegant sight with the ripped jeans he had pulled on since they were worn in and comfortable but they were not going to be the main focus of the attention although they were going to play a part with the music starting up quietly.

Beats suddenly kicked in with the thump of the bass, Deidara reacting to the change in tempo posing with his outstretched arms crossed above his head holding them steady while the male vocals spoke in the background, shrouding his face with the mass of hair waiting for the next change of beat in the hip hop song. There wasn't that long of a wait before the next one, piercing blue peeking behind the veil momentarily before the next shift only of his hips propelled to the left from the off sided angle he was on, making sure that he captured his attention.

Lazy eyes closed although not seen waiting for the full force of the tempo to start, gently rocking from his knees between soon elevating along with the women's higher pitched vocals. No matter how much you tried you could not control the beat nor can you dictate your body in the act of dance, everything moved by senses flowing in time with the music livening up your soul in the magical act of self expression. Each song can be interpreted differently with no outlook the same from person to person, some might bop, others might swing, some jump, whatever your instinct tells you that is what you run with. Deidara's was telling him that he wanted sway provocatively in prowling advanced closer towards the Uchiha maintaining his eye contact. He could direct what he wanted him to look at with the slightest movements shifting down to his thin fingers that dragged over his chest catching on the hem briefly flashing creamy tones, exploring the crevices of his own body tracing curves of his neck, lacing around the messy strands of blonde pulling it back far enough to reveal the look of seduction in his eyes.

He couldn't believe what he was seeing in front of his eyes, tilting his head slightly to the side watching the pendulum movements of his hips not staying idle for more than a few seconds and advancing closer. Fingers curled around his shoulders arching his back into a curve keeping it at a distance while his face came closer, still swaying his butt parting his lips moving in time with the words but no sound came out mimicking her lyrics singing along with it. He didn't know to be humiliated for him or to really enjoy it, each reaction perfectly imaging what he saw in his mind as if he was really the one singing the song, creating his own music video without the glamour of it. Closer his lips moved keeping firm eye contact with him, pink wetness flicking out of his mouth with a silver trail blazing across his own velvet in the break of the singing taking a playful nip smirking when he pulled back. The hand on his shoulder pressed against his chest hanging around without action for a split second before a stiff push back, sending the blonde shuffling back away from him while the stunned male flattened against the bed.

Itachi peered back up at him from the lying position he was in, fighting back a huge grin that wanted to spread so he could keep entice him more, sweeping wild blonde back over his back shaking his hips hypnotically keeping his hands following down over the curves teasingly dropping fingers over the inside of his thighs provoking eyes to match his direction. He had ensnared him in with his provocative dance so much that he wasn't even aware of it so much that the gasp of breath from the Uchiha proved he forgot to breathe entranced by the sexy wandering hands around his own frame. "Come on Itachi, you know you want to join in, un" Deidara purred prowling back towards him still not letting up on him, licking his own finger dragging it over his lips diagonally across his own singlet.

Capturing his wrist he pulled him up to stand locking his arms around the broad neck rocking against him except he was as stiff as a concrete pole, rigid unmoving completely solid. Rolling his eyes he could see he was going to have to instruct him like a nervous school boy, dropping his hands into the crook of his thin hips waiting to see if he would dare drop them lower onto the curves of his backside. …He didn't. "Loosen up. You have done this before" he reminded him without a regard if he actually remembered that time but that was something he certainly did. So close to receiving a kiss from him while they slow danced on the dance floor together, the pair still had ill feelings towards each other at that point but yet with lower guards they were close to giving into the attraction between them that they had not noticed. That seemed like a lifetime ago with all the memories they had made with each other. So much had passed leaving those times behind to evolve to something more than cruel flirting and pseudo teasing.

"…I was drunk"

And it looked like that part of his past he still remembered. Still, Deidara wasn't going to allow him to use that as an excuse, twisting in his arms grinding his butt against the other's groin clinging behind him onto his waist. "So that means you can still do it again. We are the only ones here so there is nothing to be embarrassed of" the blonde reminded him, sliding down his legs. "Do whatever your body wants you to do, un. Wave your arms around, bounce on the spot, do whatever your heart desires but don't think while you are doing it. Follow your body's reaction" Only for Itachi that would have been stand still.

This was absolutely preposterous for him to put him in this kind of situation, he was not someone who danced around like some kind of free spirit being able to feel the music no matter how much Deidara was enticing him to do so. No matter how much he willed his body to move it acted on its own accord as he had suggested but that was to do nothing at all, cemented in place. "My body is telling me to do this" he told him trying to get it through from his perspective that what he was asking couldn't be done.

Itachi certainly was not being fun at all but every good dancer needed a pole to swing around on and he would serve that purpose for him instead since he was being all high strung from it. Spinning on the ball of his foot, blonde hair swung out wide circling around with the rapid turn floating back over his shoulder when he clutched around the sturdy neck, pressing his body up close to the taunt muscles. "And mine is telling me to do this, un" One extended finger traced the curves of his structured cheek dragging the tip downwards while his lips lingered faintly by, keeping still as the wandering finger lowered down his chest. How he wanted him to react to it but Itachi could compose himself like no other he had been with, most would have at least grabbed his butt and throw him down with the smallest of looks but he was openly teasing him and nothing was coming of it. He was impervious to everything.

Clinging onto his shoulders, Deidara leaned back driving their hips together keeping them joined together by there alone while the muscles in his stomach rippled like a belly dancer would only extended out further. Girls at the clubs used to be in awe with the way he could move his body, limber and agile, guys would be in a trace. Rolling his head from side to side he rocked in time with the music vertically riding him. "Your turn now" He was at least going to get one dance out of the Uchiha.

As soon as he let go the chance was taken to break away, stepping back pivoting his foot ready to take off but one hop away found him going no more further, stuck with the hand tightly around his wrist. "No way you are getting out of this, I want to see that mood you were in the other day, un" Deidara grinned not giving him a chance to escape, snatching his wrist up before he could retreat to the comfort of the bathroom. Holding his finger up in a signal to stay, he darted over to the back of the room flicking the lights off to allow him some privacy knowing how reserved he was, hopefully this would be enough to bring him out the shell to act like there was no one else around.

Looking around at the blinding darkness around them he finally gave into what he wanted. Itachi jerked his head back and forth rolling his shoulders along with the motion in what he believe was his dance, stepping from side to side in robotic actions only that the gears of grinding were missing. The dance he got out of him before was a onetime only deal that was never going to be repeated. Eyes diverted down so he didn't have to see the stares at his degradation, a few paces forward and a couple more back in time with the beat that he could predict since the song was not know, he didn't know how else to react. "This is stupid" Itachi reminded him, clapping his hands together because he was doing what he was told, he was following the lead.

Last moments drew to closure for the song bringing them both together, this time Deidara took Itachi's hand and placed it on his hips allowing him to continue his lead with the strange snapping steps that felt so awkward as if he had a pole jammed up his butt so he couldn't shift too far or else he would rip a hole through himself. As mildly entertaining as it was the song did come to an end leaving the blonde actually speechless.

Shaking his head trying not to laugh at him, Deidara couldn't resist smothering his face into the wider shoulder breaking out into hysterics. "I take back what I said before, you are a horrible dancer, un" He should have been more encouraging especially with the way Itachi was pulling back from him except he just couldn't contain himself. Tears were streaming down his cheeks from how hard he was laughing, it had been a long time since he could sincerely have a good time like this and he had him to thank for that. Not because of his inability to dance but for being him no matter how unyielding he was.

Next song chose as random once again this time something slower, melodic, softening, even to bring his laughter to a halt, resting his head against him swaying tenderly in time. There was one thing that he would love to do to bring him out of his reservation, one thing that he wanted more than ever. "Sing for me" he spoke softly, wanting to hear his voice in a docile tone. Especially after the spectacle he made from his dancing, asking that would be certainly shot down but this time it was a gone that he must have known, listening to the hushed hums purring deep down in his throat.

Sighing out loud he had dropped the thought before it had a chance to go anywhere, dropping his eyes closed instead keeping to his rocking enjoying having him there instead. "I knew it from the beginning" Eyelids opened again hearing the deep voice that was barely above a whisper, if he hadn't have been so close he would not have heard it. "So I'm not sad" Still he continued his voice was unbelievably soothing even with the hesitation showing through, the slight crack that would cut out to nothing, shaking with nerves. "Little by little, little by little" Deidara could only encourage him further gently stroking along the curves of the muscles on his back, sways against him responded by the light arms around his waist keeping the motion continuing bringing back the same thoughts they had from the first time they had been together in that club."It's as counting numbers" Itachi really was a good dancer in his own way which was something more than what anyone else had been, all of them wanting nothing more than to grope of the dance floor, thrusting hips into him thinking it was actually doing something for him. This was what he could have never imagined that he would want, heart beats skipping from minimal movement. "The colors of dying plants get blurred. I don't find out the end of a season" Maybe it really was love.

Never before had he been close to anyone that brought him into a full state of relaxation to be able to go something like this, although judged before and mocked for his lack of skill and refinement when it came to the act of dancing, now he didn't feel judged at all. Murmured lyrics in his ear keeping it at the same low tone it had been not picking up along with the professionals vocals, not merely mimicking him but keeping to his own song as if he was singing it just for him, just like if he had wrote it just for his lover. "The moon closes the curtain. But the sun shines on me" Never had he listen to this song in the past and thought that it had any meaning behind it, not sorrow or longing but now it was speaking for him, letting the blonde know what he felt. "I knew it from the beginning. So I'm not sad"

Carefully he lifted the resting blonde's head up from his shoulder, cradling his cheeks between his widely spread hands gazing down into his eyes, directly watching him from the boost of confidence. "Even if I wake up and the night doesn't end and even if there are no shining stars there" He would be there for him no matter what just like he had stuck by his side. "Even if the all lights in the town vanish..." Without him all would be lost, he would lose himself into the void of darkness unknowing if he could return being there once already, he was the light guided him back each time. "I saw enough of the happy face of the one I should protect"

That was all he wanted to do from as far back as his memory allowed, that time where they had taken him away and nobody cared, he was determined to reclaim him but he didn't know why. That small feeling deep in the back of his mind nurtured over time, attended to making sure that this teenager that nobody wanted in their life was more than welcome in his. "And the end of the one I loved. So I am satisfied with it." Could it be that… love? Was this how it felt like? Something inside your chest that constricts every time he wasn't around? Maybe it wasn't but he felt that, he didn't want to give it a label so people could determine what it was they had for each other. He just wanted it to be.

Words could not have been spoken any more deeply, if only they weren't from the song itself but it stopped his breath as the repeated words of the singing children towards the end drew it towards it conclusion. The progression between them had been a long process never really thinking it would become nothing more that something professional, three years together leading to this and not a day went by that he would have thought it had been a wasted effort. Everyone left him, his parents, friends come and gone within a blink of an eye but he stayed although it had torn his own family apart. For that he was truly sorry but in the same breathe he was selfishly wanting him all for himself.

"…Itachi…" he breathed, silenced by the soft lips brushing against his own, drawing in for a passionate kiss.

Standing together in the centre of the room they were protected in each other's embrace, cloaked inside the darkness of night, soothed by the sounds of the rain falling against the window, they expressed themselves in the way that neither could say in words. One reserved not to speak something so freely the other not wanting to frighten him away but actions would tell them that this was not a making of a one night stand; it was rather what they had been denying to each other for far too long.

Wanting hands slid underneath the loose shirt feeling out all the contours of the refine stomach, each dip was mapped in the mind never to be forgotten while he worked the clothes up higher, breaking the kiss shared between them for a split second tugging the material off over the older man's head. Each muscle was perfectly displayed constricting with his breathing that picked up from its normal pace but the only pay of attention to them was the hand that pressed flat against his pectorals guiding them both backwards, wanting more of those precious kisses that he would not pass out to anyone. Moist lips against each other mingling heated breathes back and forth staying close to each other's warmth, the barrier between them breaking down touching the wetness against the other's coaxed into his mouth by the blonde allowing Itachi to remain dominant.

He had once made a statement directed towards him that he would let him ravage his body because despite his hard faced feminine features, he should be the one to take control of it all instead of being pinned down. This was fitting to who he was, the protector that would watch over him and make him feel alive again, reminding him that there might be one and one only in this world that could have him, which he would be worth more than money to someone. He could be more than a whore that had no emotions inside of him but they could never see that he kept them locked away so no one could harm him again.

His touch was unexpectedly soft and caring he had found out when his shirt was removed off over his head, lowered down together sitting on the edge of the bed straddling his hips so they weren't apart for too long. Butterfly kisses traced along the camber of his neck that he kept close to him brushing his fingertips through his thick black length encouraging to what he was doing was correct. No one would have cared for him like this either even the one above them had left him in states of immobility instead of subjecting him to tender handling so he wasn't aware that Itachi was capable of an act that was without aggression as it had been pushed onto him. He was hesitating unsure of if it was correct, he had never done this before he could tell as clear as day, the pounding of his heart felt through his hand, the slight shaking of nerves, he wanted to show him that no matter what he did it wouldn't hurt him.

Shuffled movements back down against his chest using him as a human pillow, resting peacefully in a matter of minutes. Although he was exhausted he couldn't sleep instead twisting the strands of blonde between his fingers gazing down at the sleeping teenager against his chest. Protect you, need you, never want to lose you, these words cycled through his head spreading a small smile that temporarily stopped his heart beat. "Thank you" he murmured softly to Deidara for making him feel something that he hadn't in a long time. Wanted for who he was not what he could do.

Sounds of the storm outside died down to a heavy patter of rain that was enough to soothe the most strongest of willed people into relaxation, the natural flow from the heavens lulled him to close his eyes listening to the sweet sounds of the rain and the even sweeter breathes of Deidara sleeping until he was taken into his dreams. This time he was not afraid of what he would see.

The musical hum of the phone vibrating across the desk instantly snapped him out of his sleep, blinding feeling around the table to catch the runaway cell that tried to fall off onto the ground with its 360 spins on the smooth surface. Ceasing it before it got the chance the lid was snapped open, groaning his greeting to whoever it was on the other side. The familiar voice was recognized in his head but only partly still under the blur of sleep mumbling words back until something was said that caught his attention. A grunt in response followed by a hang up of the phone with the short conversation, returning the cell to its resting position while he returned to his own, petting the blonde who was still laying on him sound asleep. Not even the loud blare of the phone was enough to wake him up, so typically Deidara. A bomb could explode right next to him and he wouldn't hear it.

"Deidara…" he whispered softly entering into him on the subliminal level. "We are going home"

Sun was starting to surface one again with the storm finally blowing by leaving the light streaming into the office of the later afternoon as they returned to the familiar place that had seemingly been forever since they had been there. For Itachi it had been months since he had stepped inside the doors to see the friendly… umm normal faces of the other members of the team and with the positions that they were in, Kakuzu counting his wealth and Hidan bent over chanting a mantra to his god, nothing had changed at all.

"Deidara-sempaaaaaaai I've missed you" the ecstatic surveillance officer yelled bounding over glomping the both of them catching Itachi up in the aftermath but he was glad to see him too and he could always use a big happy hug.

Not even a fight to get him off, just a serene smile at his number one fan more than happy to be home finally, back to where they should have been. Tobi moved on his own accord allowing them the space to breath but kept to his own excitement with so much to tell them but it looked like that was going to be Kisame's job as the husky man walked out of his office to greet them. It was all too nostalgic being back together, comforting, sadly to say he even missed them.

"Welcome home kids" he grinned baring the full mouth of teeth towards his family, nodding towards the office for them all to join him. Even Hidan was given the honour of joining them after a growl to stop chanting and do something constructive for a chance. Things surely were the same.

Well some things weren't as the blonde and brunette walking to the office practically joined at the hip, no wait they were with the direction of Deidara's hand resting inside of Itachi's back pocket. Open affection? Did something happen between them? Good for them, they were deserving of each other but still there was a small pang of jealousy from the big boss only he knew it was never meant to be. He didn't comment about it to make it out in the open, they were remaining professional about it so he would too, sorting through the door looking for a sorted after item that had been entrusted to him.

"This is the moment we have been waiting for boys. We have been busy since you have been gone, Tobi especially" he praised the dim witted member who was happy to receive such kind words.

"Is this the one that's been trying to kill us?" Itachi asked, leaning his hands over onto the desk staring at the file that was placed down onto the table for them to see. Just because feelings had changed there was in no way that he would act any different towards business, he was as straight arrow as they came.

Deidara too for that fact was not flaunting it around except for the discreet position of his hand that pleased Kisame. They were the correct choice for the job. "Yep this is it" he nodded revealing the treasure to them.

Eyes scanned over the information processing the words typed up, name, age, crimes, associations, prior history… Harder stares at the past of the man dropped Deidara's jaw almost to the floor unbelieving of what he had done, shaking his head not accepting this to be true at all. How could this happen? Why would something like this happen? What the fuck was going on? Itachi focused on the mug shot in front of him staring into those villainous gold eyes, drawing him in deeper wordless to who he was, what he had done, fixated on his face narrowing the blood red orbs back at him as if he was facing off directly in front of him.

This was more than what they could have expected. He was more than a petty thief that was trying to escape the boundaries of jail, his crimes far exceeded that of the common man. And now it was revealed on how he knew their movements down to perfection.

…He was one of them.