Disclaimer: Doc Martin, the program and characters are the property of Buffalo Pictures.

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

Confidences

Joan was glad when they finally arrived at Elizabeth's house. What with the long trip and the pain from her shoulder she was exhausted. Knowing that she was unlikely to be able to get much sleep wasn't making her feel much better either.

After a light supper Elizabeth helped Joan to get into her pyjamas, brush her teeth and get into bed. Chris had given her another pain killer before she had gone upstairs and it must have contained a mild sedative as she felt quite drowsy. Soon after her head hit the pillow she was able to doze off. Luckily Joan was able to sleep on her back in some comfort, so was able to get a reasonable night's sleep after all.

After getting Joan settled Elizabeth came back down into the family room and offered Chris a cup of tea or coffee.

"I'd love a tea thank you" said Chris, finally relaxing after the long day. His body had recovered remarkably well from his accident, but it still tired a lot more easily than it used to.

"Milk, sugar?"

"Black please, no sugar thanks" replied Chris.

Soon Elizabeth returned with two cups of tea and a plate of biscuits. Placing the tray on the coffee table, Elizabeth sat next to Chris on the sofa and passed his cup to him.

"You must be really tired after today. From all accounts you were the man of the moment" said Elizabeth. "If you're lucky it may even have helped your relationship with Martin somewhat."

"I hope so" said Chris, "But I'm not really expecting anything. I deserve the treatment I'm receiving now, and I can't blame Martin at all for his treatment of me. I'm sure if our roles were reversed, I'd have told me to get lost by now."

"Things are no doubt going to be hard for a long time to come" said Elizabeth "But hang in there, Rome wasn't built in a day after all, and you need to establish a foundation of trust between you before anything else can be built on it."

"You're a very wise woman" said Chris, thinking that Elizabeth's late husband had been a lucky man. He had been married himself of course, but looking back over the years he didn't think that Margaret had ever really loved him for who he was or could be, just their sexual compatibility and the status and wealth she enjoyed by being the wife of a surgeon. Looking at the relationship that Martin and Louisa shared, and the relationship that Elizabeth enjoyed with Jeff her son, Chris started to really realize what a shallow and unfulfilled life he had led. Sure, he had enjoyed position and power and all of the luxuries that wealth could provide, but that was all gone now and he could see how shallow it all had been now that he was able to look back.

He also realised that he had never had a really close friend in his life, let alone a wife that he could turn to no matter what, and know that she was there to support him. Looking at all he should have held dear in the past and all that he now knew, he called himself all kinds of a fool and swore to himself that he would never make that mistake again. Family and friends were much more valuable than anything money could buy, and if he was ever in a position to marry again he would marry for love and nothing else that was for sure.

"Penny for your thoughts" Elizabeth said. "I'm not sure what you were thinking of, but you appeared to be thinking deep thoughts".

"Sorry" said Chris. "Forgive me I was just looking back at my life and thinking what a fool I was and how much my stupidity has cost me, not financially of course but emotionally. Still, I don't want to bore you but I will say that your friendship means a lot to me and I thank you for it."

"You're welcome" said Elizabeth taking one of Chris' hands and holding it between hers.

"I realize that I would probably have disliked the old you intensely, but I have only met the 'new you' so to speak and I like to take people as I find them. I can see that you are sorry for your selfishness in the past and are trying to make amends and I'll do my best to help you as I believe family to be vitally important, and I think ultimately Martin needs a relationship with you even if just a casual one, as much as you need one with him and his family. Now, I'll show you where everything is as I need to get some sleep and I'm sure you do too, as you've got surgery tomorrow morning haven't you?"

Chris followed Elizabeth upstairs after she had locked up and turned off the lights, bringing his overnight bag with him.

Elizabeth showed him the bathroom, the toilet and his room which was across the hallway from her room and Joan's spare room. Opening the door, she ushered him in gave him a brief kiss goodnight and left him to it.

When in bed, Chris took the time to contemplate the day. He'd been thanked by Martin, kissed on the cheek by Louisa, and thanked by Joan. Phil had given him a nickname of Dochris and actually thought about him when Joan was initially hurt and Martin was out of contact. Best of all, he had someone he could talk to who wasn't holding his past against him and didn't seem to find him physically repulsive. Chris smiled happily to himself as he drifted off to sleep still feeling Elizabeth's kiss on his lips.

Elizabeth was up early the next morning so she could give Joan her painkiller and help her to get dressed, showered etc and provide her with breakfast. Chris was up soon after and had his shower when Joan had finished hers. The bathroom was small but clean and tidy and reminded him of Elizabeth, especially the smell of the shower gel and shampoo. Chris found himself smelling it and remembering the kiss from last night.

After his shower Chris was about to shave when he had the sudden idea that maybe a beard would be a good way to hide some of the scarring on his face. Looking closely at himself, he gauged where the beard was likely to grow in and how it would look, and feeling that it might just be the way to go. Unfortunately, Chris was like Martin in that he was not a particularly hairy man, and really only needed to shave every second day. Growing a beard was going to take him a long time. Looking at himself in the mirror now, he was only slightly scruffy but didn't want to look any more unattractive than he already did especially while Elizabeth was present. When was he going to grow the beard? That was the major question in his mind. If he started now it would grow sooner, but he'd look scruffy this morning. Maybe he'd start tomorrow and try to avoid seeing anyone until it had grown in. With his decision made, Chris got out his electric shaver and began to shave. With all of his scarring, it was virtually impossible to shave with a blade now as there were too many indentations in his skin.

His morning ablutions complete, Chris joined Elizabeth and Joan for breakfast. "Good morning everyone, how are you feeling Joanie?"

"Not as bad as yesterday, but not wonderful, that's for sure" said Joan

"I take it that you've already had your painkiller?" asked Chris.

"Yes, Elizabeth gave it to me earlier on, and it's taken the edge off the pain a bit."

"Good. Hopefully the trip home won't be too horrible for you. I have to work this morning but should be back here by about 1pm. I can then take you back home then if that suits you?"

"Yes that will be fine" said Joan.

Chris finished his breakfast and said his goodbyes and headed outside to go to his car. Elizabeth followed him and said "Have a nice day, and drive carefully. We'll see you when you get back" then giving him a quick peck on the cheek, she gave a small wave then headed back inside to Joan.

Joan was in a bit of quandary, she really liked Elizabeth and felt that maybe she should fill her in a bit on Chris, but then Elizabeth was a grown woman and no doubt capable of running her own life without Joan's help. There was also the fact that maybe her brother was actually genuine this time, and he had changed his ways. If this was the case, who was she to try to make trouble. Joan decided to hold her tongue and just answer Elizabeth's questions if she asked any.

Elizabeth, seeing the various expressions running across Joan's face had a bit of an idea what she was thinking, and thought that the best thing would probably be to bring things out into the open.

"You're worried about me and my friendship with Chris aren't you?" Elizabeth said.

"What makes you say that?" said Joan cautiously

"You're thinking about how bad he was as a brother, and how appalling he was as a father to poor Martin, and you're worried that he's going to hurt me aren't you?" she replied

"How did you know about Chris' past?" Joan asked

"He told me everything, and as far as I know he held nothing back. I know that he was a horrible brother, and how he had made Martin feel unwanted for all of his life, given him over to you during the boarding school holidays, taken him from you as a punishment when he felt like it, belittled you and Martin at every turn, especially Martin and allowed his ex wife Margaret to do the same thing. He's told me more too, but that was the general gist of it".

"He told you all of that? Well that is surprising. I would have imagined that he would try very hard to keep his past from you. Maybe his change of heart is genuine after all." Mused Joan

"I think so. I think the accident really shook him up, and having nearly died he took the opportunity to take stock of his life and didn't like what he saw. I really think he's trying his best to change, and I've told him that I will help him all that I can. I've also said that if I had met the old him I would no doubt have wanted absolutely nothing to do with him, but as I've only met the reformed Chris his past sins are really just abstract concepts to me as I was never affected by them, so I can be friends with the new Chris and help him all I can" Elizabeth replied.

"You don't find his scarring repulsive then?" asked Joan

"It's not what I'd call pretty, but it certainly doesn't repel me in fact I hardly even notice it now" Elizabeth replied. "He has lovely blue eyes, and they seem so sad a lot of the time, it brings out the mothering instinct in me I suppose.

"I see what you mean about the scarring, I never see it now either. I'm used to it too I suppose" said Joan.

"Anyway, I've been thinking" Elizabeth said. "You're not going to be able manage very well on your own for a while, and Louisa will be going back to work soon. I notice that you've got a spare room at your house, how about I come back with you and stay for a while until your arm is improved enough for you to manage on your own. I can help you with Phil too which will save Martin and Louisa having to find a new babysitter and we can have a nice time catching up. That's if you're happy to have a visitor that is?"

"Are you sure? What about Clare and Amelia? It would be great to have you, and it would solve a lot of problems, but I don't want to put you out at all" said Joan.

"Clare's not working so she and Amelia will be fine. Plus Amelia starts Pre School this term too so Clare will have plenty of time to herself. I will be of much more use at your house, if you're happy to have me."

"That would be wonderful. You could come down with us, and I'm sure Chris could give you a lift back here on one of his surgery days when you're ready to come home."

"That's settled then" said Elizabeth. "I'll just get my bag together and give Clare a call to let her know what's going on.