Chapter Twenty-five

Daniel cried out like a desperate prey animal caught in the claws of a hungry predator. When he had first been left to suffer he had done so silently. Gritting his teeth together he had refused to show the effects the drugs were having on him. Eventually he came to two different breaking points. One was purely physical, a consequence of fear and agony. The other was more of a mental collapse, a forced decision to forget pride and attempted to gain his captors pity and hopefully their mercy.

It was difficult for him to tell if anyone was still in the room anymore, if anyone could even hear him. Delirious and exhausted he was reduced to a quiet whimpering. If anything it was more pathetic than the screaming, but once again no one seemed to take notice. Shivering he tried to block out the sensations that he knew should be impossible.

Daniel had been experiencing a continual shearing of skin and flesh that didn't exist. When he had first fallen into the icy seawater he had managed to keep the injury to himself. Even when he had admitted that he wasn't going to be able to go with Sam and Mitchell he had forced a brave smile. He hadn't wanted his friend to think they were leaving him to die slowly in pain. When he still had the limb the pain had made sense. However, now it was as if his body remembered the flesh dying and was replaying it in a desperate attempt to get him to do something about it, even though it was far too late for that.

"If I could change the past I would." Daniel muttered to himself. "I swear."

Daniel's nervous system was not interested in logic. It wanted him to take action and when he didn't comply it just pushed more adrenaline into his blood to try and motivate him further. Daniel knew that remaining calm was going to be the key to survival so he tried to ignore the growing panic. Even just laying still and not tugging on the restraints took all his mental energy.

He wasn't sure how long he fought body against mind. However, eventually both aspects of his being were too tired to continue the struggle. He passed out into a dreamless sleep and when he woke the phantom pain had reduced in intensity. Daniel took the opportunity to try and figure out how he had come to be where he was, but nothing he could think of made any sense. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard the door opening.

Still blind he could only turn his general attention in the direction of the noise. 'T' walked over and noted his blood pressure and heart rate out loud. Daniel kept hearing a click before the doctor would say this kind of information and he decided that it must be a recording device.

Without so much as a 'hello' the doctor began a general physical exam. Double checking the IV needles in the back of Daniel's hand he repositioned one that Daniel had managed to work free. He offered, or rather forced, Daniel to drink some water. He then busied himself with what Daniel assumed was a medical chart.

"You know I've had a chance to think this over" Daniel said in as conversational a tone as he could manage "and in all honesty I think there has been some sort of mistake. If you are military, and I know that you are, you'd better give your superiors a quick call before taking this any further."

Without paying Daniel any heed the doctor pushed a needle into his arm. The duration of the penetration told Daniel that he was losing some more blood to be tested. He stayed still for the procedure because the last time he had pulled away it had only caused him more pain and in the end they got the blood they were after anyway. He was not going to get out of this with physical strength, talking his way free was going to be the only option.

"202-555-9791, you call that number and when they ask you who gave it to you tell them it was Dr. Daniel Melbourne Jackson. See what they have to say about that. You'll be surprised by their response, trust me. Ask them who I am."

"I don't care who you are."

"I bet you'll care when you have half the Air Force up your ass."

Even though he couldn't see Daniel could sense 'T' rolling his eyes. The disregard with which he was being treated with caused Daniel to fight against the restraint again even though he knew it was pointless. They had added another thick strap that pinned down his hips because he had come close to succeeding in hurting himself without it. No one cared that he was struggling because they knew just as well as he did that he wasn't going to get free.

Forcing himself to stop Daniel's thoughts raced. It wasn't easy to push the fear to the side and think clearly about what to do. It had been different in the past when he'd been taken hostage by forces that wanted something he had to give. In this situation all the doctor had to do was take. Knowing that he couldn't stop him, no matter how silent his tongue was, drove Daniel's panic beyond its normal limits. The clicking noise repeated letting Daniel know that the next words were going to be about him and not for him.

"I have decided that risks of the powdered form of the Acetylcholnioxileyne 457 are being taking unnecessarily." 'T' said in his monotone voice. "Now that I can control dosing there is no reason for this delivery method, also the degradation of the ACX compound through the intestinal tract may be tainting results, although preliminary results are still positive. Starting with 5cc of injectable."

"Can we talk about this?" Daniel asked desperately. "You said something about a Peace Prize, I'd really like to know how you hope to accomplish that through torture and murder."

"The list of medical breakthroughs that have resulted from 'torture' is endless. Doctors used to have to resort to grave robbery just to learn anatomy, the Nazis taught us more about hypothermia and the dangers of asbestos, lead, and mercy than anyone wants to admit to. Modern medicine wouldn't be where it is today if it weren't for so call 'butchers', many of whom are lauded as heroes today."

"That doesn't make it right!"

"I never said anything about being 'right'." 'T' replied calmly. "If I can learn from you where the last piece in my puzzle fits the lives of millions will forever be changed for the better."

"And if I don't hold that key?"

"Then I'll know better the next time I try."

Daniel could hear the soft flicking sound that he had come to associate with someone trying to tap the bubbles out of a filled syringe. The brushing of the IV lines moving across his skin told him that drug was going to be injected directly into the IV rather than his skin. He took a deep breath and looked up in the direction he believed his tormentor to be in. He wasn't sure if he'd caught his eye or not, but he assumed that he had.

"I have to know...why me?"

"Because you're someone that no one will grieve over."

"That's not true."

"You don't believe that, I can hear the lie in your voice."

"I hav..."

Daniel stopped with a sharp gasp. The back of his hand had suddenly started to burn. The sensation clawed its way up his arm and quickly spread into his chest.

"Subject reacted to administration of ACX despite being injected into IV, therefor there is no possibility of placebo effect."

Daniel didn't hear the doctor's observations, his attention was taken up completely by the acid creeping through his veins. When the drug settled in his heart it slammed against its bony cage. Daniel's muscles snapped tight against his frame, arching him against the restraints. In the background he could hear the heart monitor wailing in panic that mirrored his own.

"Taylor bring the crash cart closer, he might go into arrest. 5cc may have been too much to start."

The strap over his chest was released and instead secured around his left upper arm to keep him from sitting up. Hands were sudden on the collar of his scrubs, tearing them open. If he actually had a heart attack they were going to be prepared. Once the boiling blood hit his heart it had quickly spread through his arteries. When it raced up the carotid arteries in his throat he thought he might actually manage to pass out or even die.

Instead of escalating once the drug had washed over his whole system the shock died down. Daniel did not enjoy the release for long. The phantom pain lanced up his left side with an intensity that hadn't been matched by even the initial injury. Digging his fingers into the bedsheets Daniel screamed. His voice was already raw, causing his cry to be distorted and painful even to his own ears.

Daniel tried to jerk away as 'T' ran his hand through his sweat soaked hair. The affectionate touch was less welcome than the poisonous injection. Forcing himself to take control of his quick shallow breathing he managed a few deep breaths. The doctor slid his hand down onto the side of Daniel's face and rested it there like a mother trying to calm a hysterical child.

"I'll make a deal with you."

"No." Daniel growled.

"Hear me out. I'll give you a healthy dose of morphine, if you'll describe to me the effects you have experienced today and over the past eight months. I want detailed descriptions of how much of the Percocet you were going thorugh on a daily basis, the sensations and any possible side effects you've encountered, including the ulcer and the extra bone growth."

"No."

"You know, right now my only other option for gathering information is vivisection, and I don't have a anesthesiologist on hand."

Daniel could not hide the way he tensed at the threat of being dissected alive. He was just finding the courage to say 'no' when the hand on his face traced down the length of his body. 'T' slipped hand over the healed end of Daniel's missing leg. Even with just a slight pressure Daniel's breath hissed across his teeth.

"Clearly it is agonizing just to be touched, imagine if I'm forced to cut into you."

"Why should I help you?" Daniel asked through his clenched teeth. "You're going to kill me no matter what I do."

"That's not necessarily true. Personally I'd rather see you live through a set of experiments so that I can observe your long term survival rate."

"You expect me to believe that?!" Daniel spat.

"Why wouldn't you? It makes scientific sense. You don't know where you are, you don't know who I am..."

"You're Dr. Thomline...my surgeon, the name behind the prescriptions."

"You should have kept that to yourself, Dr. Jackson."

"Why bother? I know that you know I've figured it out."

"You are observant." Dr. Thomline sighed. "I will sweeten the deal then, tell me everything and I'll not only minimize your suffering, but I will tell you why it's happening."

"N..."

Before Daniel could reject his tormentor again the doctor pressed his fingertips into the super over reactive flesh. Thrashing as best he could against the excruciating flare Daniel couldn't even cry out, his voice stolen by suddenly being thrown violently against his pain threshold. Breaking down into tears he fought for each breath.

"Taylor," Thomline said casually "get the OR ready."

"No," Daniel panted "wait..."

"I'd love to."

Daniel thought that he was going to be forced into begging for the morphine, but Thomline already had the injection drawn. The relief was not complete, but it was more than enough to allow Daniel to relax. Closing his eyes he tried to focus his attention on his slowly lowering heart beat. He thought he might actually get away with just pretending to have fallen asleep. However Thomline gave his cheek a quick, almost playful slap.

"I'm listening." Daniel said.

"I take it you expect me to go first?" Thomline chuckled.

"You're the one with all the power here, so it seems only fair."

"Okay. As I am sure you have noticed I am working on the nervous system. I have been working on a compound for the past twenty years that will regenerate and bridge the gap between disconnected neurons. My work with rats have shown amazing progress, however, without human trials I will never get to where I am going."

"There are legal channels for human trials."

"Not when seventy-nine percent of your rats chew their own limbs off. The process is painful, but the results are worth it. Animals however do not have the ability to bear pain for a gain."

"What is my suffering gaining me?" Daniel asked.

"You personally? Nothing." Thomline admitted. "However, if you were, let's say paraplegic, you may walk again. My Acetylcholnioxileyne 457 has the potential to reverse the damage done by spinal injury, but it's applications don't end there: multiple sclerosis, Huntington's disease, amytrophic lateral sclerosis, and so many more disorders of the nervous system could have their treatment or even there cure here."

"I...I don't understand, if you are working to treat neurological disorders how does doing experiments on people who don't have any of those disorders even help?" Daniel protested. "What are you learning from me?"

"I'm learning a 'proof of concept'. You have heavily damaged nerves, much of the pain arises from the connections having nowhere to go as they are regenerated. And of course when spinal cord injury patients complain of pain in areas that they shouldn't even have sensation it's big news. When an amputee complains of 'phantom pain' it is a concern, but no one thinks twice about it. Nor is it a shock when they commit suicide."

"Let me guess, you're the military's local coroner for suspicious deaths. These men who have killed themselves on your drugs...you get their bodies. You get to see the nerve regrowth during autopsy and you know that they suffer from severe phantom pain because they've all called you and told you about it...even I did."

"You are a bright man, I'm pleased to have you as my first live study. I'll understand if you find little comfort in that fact."

Daniel found absolutely no comfort in making a good candidate for the doctor's twisted experiments. Now that he had his answer he settled into a stony silence. He had no intention of sharing his experiences with the doctor. He still held on to a thread of hope that David might be able to figure out what happened to him, but other than that he considered death a certainty. Suddenly a strange scent assaulted Daniel's senses, it reminded him of rotting onions. It was followed by an odd sensation, like being slightly drunk.

"Wha...what is that?"

"The injection is known to cause an odor sensation..."

"What is it?" Daniel interrupted.

"Sodium thiopental, better known as sodium pentothal."

"Truth serum." Daniel groaned.

"Just something to help you relax."

"Thanks."

"Want to honor your side of our bargain?"

"No."

"I guess I worded that wrong. Tell me about your phantom pain, is it accompanied by a strong phantom limb sensation as well?"

Daniel struggled against the powerful fast acting barbiturate that was swimming in his blood. Thomline kept asking questions in his gentle voice and it wasn't long before Daniel couldn't think of a reason not to answer them. He told him about the phantom limb being so powerful that even months after the surgery he had woken up in the morning and tried to simple get out of bed, always ending in a fall to the floor. After discussing everything from the intense pain to the vivid nightmares Daniel told Thomline about the suicide attempt.

"Why did you fail at the suicide?"

"I tried to take too much at once and threw it up, I got rid of the rest of it."

"Really?" Thomline asked in instant interest. "So that's why your first blood tests came back so clean."

"I guess."

"How did you survive the combined withdrawal effects? The lack of Percocet alone should have been enough to kill you."

"Ja..." Daniel trailed off. "Someone helped me..."

"Who?"

"I don't remember."

"How did they help you?"

"I don't remember."

"Did they put you on a clean source of Percocet?"

"I don't remember." Daniel repeated.

"Did they suspect that the drugs you were on were tainted?"

"I don't remember."

Now that Daniel had an answer in his mind he just kept repeating it. He was starting to come back to his senses from the low dose of the penthothal. Even under the spell of the drugs his mind had begun to scream a warning at him when he had started to talk about Janet. He had physically bitten down on his tongue when he had almost slipped.

Thomline sighed heavily, he seemed to realize that the information he had just received was all he was going to get today. Daniel was so surprised when the cuff around his right wrist was released that he didn't even have a chance to take advantage of the situation.

"Taylor, hold his wrist up above his head for me. Be careful with the IV lines."

Having his arm pinned in a vulnerable position jolted Daniel back to the situation at hand. His shirt had already been ripped open so there was nothing between his skin and the doctor's intentions. There was a cold wet contact on his side that caused him to try and pull away, however, Taylor held him with an iron grip.

"What's happening?" Daniel asked.

"I'm going to insert a needle between your lower ribs..."

"What? Why?"

"In order to take liver sample, I need to see if there is any damage. Make sure you to hold your breath while I do so, I'll tell you when."

"And if I don't?" Daniel snarled.

"I might puncture your diaphragm or lung and in that case I'll have to cut you open even wider to fix it, which I guarantee you will not be pleasant. Now then on three, deep breath and hold it. One..."

"Wai..."

"Two...three."

Fearing what would happen if he didn't comply Daniel took a breath and held it. There was a sudden radiating pain like being given a swift kick to the stomach. As the thick syringe dove deeper into the blood rich organ Daniel's good leg jerked spasmodically. Just as he was fearing that he couldn't hold his breath any longer he felt the invasive metal being yanked out. Daniel cried out as Thomline pressed a piece of gauze hard against the wound.

"Keep your struggling to a minimum for the next few hours to prevent this from opening again."

"Didn't..." Daniel painted heavily. "Didn't you take the Hippocratic Oath?"

"That was a long ago."

"It expires? 'At least do no harm', that's the Oath: do no harm."

"I am not doing harm. I am making the necessary sacrifices for the betterment of the greater good. I am taking the lives of a few to save the lives of many."

"I've dealt with countless creatures who think they are Gods...none of them have been half as delusional as you."

"I never said I was a God."

"You just enjoy playing as one?" Daniel hissed angrily. "This isn't medicine, it's not even science, it's torture."

"My work is more important than one man."

"I don't deserve to die like this, no one does. Not for any reason. Have you asked any of the people that you claim you are going to help if they would condemn another, even a stranger, to this cruel fate in order to save themselves?"

Daniel didn't get a response. He could hear the doctor's steps retreating and the door slamming. Too exhausted to even fall asleep Daniel just turned his head to the side and closed his blind eyes. He took comfort in the fact that he had manage to keep Janet's name off his lips, but still feared for her. It wouldn't take much for Thomline to find her, they had been much too public about their connection to one another. Tears slipped from his closed eyes, but they weren't for himself.

"Keep her safe, David."