I looked at the clock on my nightstand and it displayed 6 PM. I was bored and I had nothing to do in that crappy room. I sighed and took a chance by exiting the bedroom, alone and unsafe. I wandered in the corridors of the medium sized ship and couldn't find anything or anyone who would help. I descended to the lower levels and caught the sight of the hangar. I wonder what they'll do when they find out I'm the pilot of the stolen Vengeance... I took the elevator and descended to the lowest level, where the hangar was supposed to be. I stepped out as soon as I saw the doors open and walked through the boxes of supplies. Where's my Mobile suit? I was beginning to panic: Lacus Clyne had entrusted this nuclear-fuelled weapon and I was supposed to protect it and take care of it. What if I had lost this all-important machine? I looked around, reckless and bumped into someone. I looked up and saw Le Creuset looking straight at me like I was a mad person.
"What are you doing here, Miss? I thought you'd be sleeping." He said, wondering.
"I've had plenty of sleep. I want to know where my Mobile suit is." I stated, clearly worrying about the only thing I had left in the world.
"Of course. I... discovered that you're Mobile suit... is not very conventional... right? Of course I'm right, I can see the truth in your eyes. You're one of Lacus's friend, am I right? You're Kim Desjardins from the Archangel." He said, putting a hand on my shoulder. My cover's blown now...
"Don't you worry about a thing. I won't tell... It'll be our little secret..." I frowned and took a step back, on my guards.
"What the hell do you want with me?" I asked, suspicious. "Oh... I believe you are very valuable... you're the key I've been searching for years... Yes, you're just the person I need... Of course, I don't expect you to respond to the only favor I will ask out of you, but I will try anyway..." I stepped back in disgust and could feel the shivers down my spine.
"Are you a pedophile? Are you a sicko? What do you want from me?"
He smile and laughed. "What? You thought I would ask you that kind of favor? Of course not! Actually... I want you to come in space with us. We are heading to Carpentaria and from there a shuttle with bring us back to the PLANTs where you'll fill your duties towards me... After all, I saved your life..." he said.
"Are you blackmailing me? Is this some kind of shit trap you've set for me? Where are we and what the fuck do you want from me? It's the last time I'm going to ask you!" I screamed, glaring at his pale face. He smiled and lowered his head to my level. "I want you to change the world for me. You will understand when the time comes. I have my ways of persuasion: I know you know my subordinate, Mr. Joule, very well. If you don't want something terrible to happen to him, I suggest you smile in my presence and follow me into space." He said, handing me his long hand. That's fucking blackmail. What do I have to lose now except for Yzak? He's the only one I can trust here... I'll fight for him.
I took his right hand into mine and shook it. "I knew you would agree. Now, I'll bring you to your Mobile suit. Of course, I won't say a word about its origins and I assume you'll do the same. Oh, what a surprise! Yzak is here." He said, pointing at Yzak's figure in front of the Vengeance. Yzak turned around and he looked outraged, out of control with anger. "Commander Le Creuset, can I talk to Miss Desjardins for minute?" he asked, his teeth clenched. "Why, of course you can. I'll leave you two alone." Said Le Creuset, walking away, smiling slyly.
"Kim, what the fuck? You're the woman who Lacus Clyne gave the Vengeance to! I should've known better!" he said, his eyes sending flames. I closed mine and crossed my arms. "So now you know... I'm sorry you had to learn about it this way." I said, looking up at the purple Mobile suit. "I am also sorry I'll have to protect it with my life, Yzak. You try to take it from me and... Well, you don't want to know." He violently grabbed my arm and made me look at him.
"So you're with the Archangel again?" he asked, knowing the answer. He wouldn't admit it in front of me but I could see it in his eyes he was sad I was back with Kira and his friends again.
"Yes, I am. I have found my way, Yzak, is that so wrong? I fight for what I think is right... Do you?" This seemed to have angered it more than ever and he hurt my arm so bad I yelped.
"You're a soldier, stop whining!" he exclaimed.
"You're a man, stop trying to overpower me!" I said, snapping my arm away from him.
"How do you expect me to react? I'm so angry at you! I hate you right now!" he screamed, his eyes filled with pain.
"What do you want me to say to you, Yzak? I hate you for not understanding the situation better? You should understand: you're a brilliant soldier! If only you could understand that this war is futile and useless...! If only you could see that you're fighting against the wrong things! I can't make you see... like I see it now... You need to see for yourself what the Coordinators and the Naturals have in common and what strength they could have if they would actually stopping hating each other for what the other is and isn't..."
"You're nuts! The Naturals are evil! They... They sent nuclear missiles on Junius Seven! They destroyed and it and... and..." Tears blinded his proud face and he looked away. I closed my eyes and bit my lip, understanding the reason of his sadness.
"What... your parents on Junius Seven?" I asked, ashamed. He didn't answer right away: he took the time to recompose himself and looked at the ground. "My... my father was on Junius Seven while it happened. He was on a shuttle, ready to leave when the missiles struck." He said, his hands in fists. "God damn it...!" I cursed under my breath and kicked the ground furiously. If only I knew... If only I would've known...
"I am truly sorry for your loss, Yzak. I... understand if you hate me for what I did to you... I would hate myself too." I said, stepping back. I turned around and walked away, my face swelling with shame and embarrassment. I whipped the tears that blinded my eyes with my shirt and cursed at myself for being so stupid in the past. It wasn't enough that I killed my parents, I had to kill one of his! I'm so dumb and stupid, I should've died along with the thousands others who perished that day... I should've...! My thoughts were interrupted by Yzak's arms wrapping around my body, his head resting against my back.
"Don't go." He said in between two breaths. The moment lasted forever in my head but only a few seconds had passed. He finally let go and grabbed my wrist. "Come... I'll accompany you upstairs..." he said, walking in front of me.
The walk to my room was long but seemed even longer with Yzak: it was like time itself wanted me to spend more time with him. We passed a girl with long raspberry hair and I frowned. I gasped and turned around, shocked.
"...Flay...?" I asked, almost whispering. The girl turned around to see who was calling her and her grey eyes met mine.
"...Flay, is that you?" I asked daringly. She nodded but didn't know what to say: she kept silence, dumbfounded.
"...What are you doing here?" I asked, jerking my hand out of Yzak's grasp.
"...Kim, are you... you're...!" she said, unable to make a complete sentence without her voice cracking from sobs.
"Flay!" I ran in her direction and she took a few seconds to regain her composure and do the same. When we made contact, our bodies trembled from sobs and we've hidden our faces in each other's hair. "I thought you died, back at Orb!" she said, laying her head on my shoulder. "Kim, I'm so sorry for what I did...! I should never have...!" I shut her up by cutting her off.
"I don't care about this anymore! I'm so happy you're alive! I thought you died in Alaska, when the Cyclops System had destroyed it!"
"I managed to escape with that man... Commander Le Creuset... He took me here and he's bringing me to the PLANT's... From there, I have no idea where I'm going to go." She said, obviously worried.
"Me neither... but we were part of the Archangel crew... we've got through much worst...!" She nodded and looked back. "I've got to go. I'll see you later, Kim." She said, running along other crewmembers. I rejoined with Yzak and he nudged my arm.
"What's going on between you and that girl? Do you know her?" he asked, curious. "Yeah... she was part of the Archangel's crew." I said, making him twitchy by saying the legged ship's name. I sighed and walked along with him in silence. "Why aren't you talking?" he asked, suspicious.
"Listen... when are we going to be in Carpentaria?" I asked.
"Probably tomorrow morning. Until then, I'm off duty. What do you... want to do?" he asked, his cheeks gaining a little color.
"I can't believe this! Is Yzak Joule asking me on a ship date?" I asked, giggling. "If you don't want to, then you just could've said so!" he said, storming off, his face red from embarrassment and from being laughed at.
"Come on, Yzak! I was playing around with you! Of course I want to do something with you! I'm just surprised!" I said, running behind him. I followed him in a room with a huge television. He sat on the futon, furious and opened the T.V on the national news. It was a speech of Athrun Zala's father, the Chairman of ZAFT. Yzak locked on the television, his gaze lost on the terrifying images of people, Naturals being killed in action and ships being destroyed. The Chairman's voice echoed behind the images of war that passed as a program.
"Do not allow yourselves to be swayed by the words of Lacus Clyne! She is a traitor who established contact with the Earth Forces and sold vital information to them! Nobody prefers to fight... but think about how we got into this situation in the first place! Take a moment to remember...! Think of the oppression perpetrated by the Naturals against us Coordinators, out of envy for our developed abilities even thought it was the Naturals who created us in the first place! And yet, think or the repeated selfish, unreasonable demands made on us by the nations who sponsored the PLANTs, all because of their desire for our advanced technology! Think about that one single missile shot at Junius Seven as their answer to our rise against them! This is a war that we have to win! Defeat will result in a future even darker than our past. We mustn't be swayed by information tainted with bad intentions. We are now a different species, different from the Naturals! Our advanced intelligence will eventually solve the many problems we currently face!" Yzak's face was twisted with pain and rage and mine was paralyzed with fear. Is this what this has come down to? To eradicating one another? Is that the way we chose to find peace? It's never going to work! Not with all of this omnipresent hate and political issues concerning the way people are! It's too much a task to change the world so radically! It will bring us, all of us, down! I... I must try to put a stop to this farce.
"Yzak, you're not going to believe this man's words, right?" I asked, afraid of the look he was wearing on his face.
"He's... he's speaking the truth... We are better than the Naturals... we are more intelligent and I'm sick of fighting... We're a different species..." he muttered, lost in his thoughts. I slapped the back of his head and he swiftly turned around.
"Are you out of your mind? This is brainwashing! On both sides they're trying to brainwash the people to fight for them while they sit there and watch! I won't let you fall in that trap you'll never be able to get out of! He's telling you how to think! Do you think that's normal, sane, okay? Do you think that choosing war is better than choosing peace? This is not what you think: it's their ideology, not yours!" I said, grabbing his shoulder.
"You don't know! How would you know? You lived in a killing spree facility for years! You were paid to kill whoever they orders or wanted dead! You destroyed Junius Seven with your own hands! How could you? How can you say that to me?" he screamed, pushing me away.
"Don't you understand I get it better than anybody else here? I've been through that hate and I've lived the facts, Yzak! This is why I don't want you to become the person I was: I am ashamed! I understand so much better now! I thought killing the enemy was the only way to fight a war! I thought hating the other side was the way to go but it's not! Violence is not the answer, ever! We must make decisions another way, a more peaceful and humane way! Listen to me: you don't want to see the aftermath of this war! After eliminating the Earthlings, Coordinators won't have anybody to rely on anymore! They don't grow freaking trees and the ground doesn't produce metal in the PLANTs! It's all artificial! Coordinators can't afford to destroy Naturals or Earth...!"
"We can live without them! We can manage, I'm sure of it!" he said.
"No you can't! Coordinators are not as many as Naturals! Tell me: do Coordinators order their children like they did back in the days? Do they produce them artificially?" I asked, wondering.
"I... We have them naturally but that doesn't..."
"Of course it matters! Today, the kids are made naturally, not artificially! What do you think will happen if Coordinators aren't made anymore? They, we will disappear with time! The only ones who will remain are our naturally born hybrids! How cruel is that? By destroying Naturals, we are destroying diversity! That will cause congenital problems and everybody will become sick and they'll be damned to even live! Do you see the big picture now? It's not about who's right and who's wrong anymore: it's about life itself. Get a grip, Yzak. War will only destroy what we worked so hard to achieve in all of mankind's history." I said, putting hands on my temples.
"...You're a Coordinator... How can you think like that?" he asked, amazed. He stood up from his seat and faced me. He knew I was born and raised as a Natural and also adopted the mentality. Some things had changed since I've learned about all of my options. I had learned to forgive myself and to trust myself again. He knew he would make me a happy woman but he also knew it wasn't the right time to do so. He sighed and shook his head, wearing a smirk on his face
"I manage to think... unlike you." I said, smiling. I closed my eyes and let myself be embraced by him, his whole body touching mine in a way only he could do so to me. I took a deep breath and buried my face in his neck, smelling the scent of a grown man, a man that smells as spicy as he smelled sweet, even though his persona was more like spice. His hands rubbed by back reassuringly and he let his nose touch my forehead.
"I don't know... where I'd be today... if it wasn't for you." He said. A man that can tell that to a woman is a real man amongst monkeys. "You're a great man by yourself, Yzak."
His hands wandered lower and reached the bottom of my back, slowly caressing my butt. "Yzak, don't you even go there." I said, pushing away his hands, making him pout. "Oh now you're acting like a baby! Come on, didn't you want to do something? I thought you were asking me on a date..." I said, taking the man by surprise.
"Yeah... I guess I wanted to do so too... But I feel like shit all of a sudden. I think I'll go for a nap..." he said, walking away to the door. Is he ditching me? I turned around to ask for an explanation but he cut my thoughts off.
"Aren't you coming?" he asked. I smiled and nodded softly, following him outside, leaving to his room. We slept peacefully until morning, where we would finally dock in Carpentaria.