Okay, I can explain. But I won't.

Before you all ask, no, this is not the final chapter. This it PART ONE of the final chapter, which I figured you guys deserved because I took so damn long. The other chapter will follow soon, and THAT will be followed by an epilogue.

Disclaimer: Oh, how I wish it were mine.

Warning: none, really, for this one.

Lucius opened his eyes into a world he had half-forgotten- or, at least, tried to forget. Sirius was at his side, tense as the Gryffindor evaluated the dimly lit room that had been born of Lucius' memories.

The other Lucius was young, and confident, easily draped in one chair as he faced the only other person in the ornate room. It was draped in green and sliver drapes, which turned bronze in the fire's glow. A large man with a tattoo of a snake-tongued skull on his forearm was hunched in the opposite chair. The two could not have been more unalike- slim and broad, dark hair and light, loose and stiff. But the two of them shared a regal grace. And the same shade of dove-grey eyes.

"The Dark Lord has been asking me about you, Lucius. You are next in line to enter his inner circle should something happen to me," The dark man reached for a glass, which was releasing a greenish vapor, on the nearby table. "Our family is coming into a place of higher power which it deserves. You must not ruin this for me, for us."

The blonde man tossed his hair over one shoulder and smiled brazenly, looking ready to handle whatever task the Dark Lord could throw at him. "Certainly, Father. I would do no such thing."

"He wishes you to find the place where the Order of the Phoenix meets." The twenty-something Lucius' smile froze in place, dread entering his eyes. The elder Malfoy did not seem to notice, but Sirius took in a quick breath, and Lucius flinched, reliving the moment. "He believes that you possess an anonymity that will prove useful. Not to mention your… looks."

"H-he wants me to find what hordes of Death Eaters cannot?" Lucius said, his smile brittle.

Abraxas sent him a harsh look. "You will not ruin this chance for us. If he wants you to find it, you will. By any means necessary." He took a deep drink of the steaming beverage. "That will be all, Lucius," He added offhandedly, noticing his son had not bounded up and out of the room at the implicit dismissal.

"…Certainly, father." Lucius stood and quickly exited, snatching a glass of an onyx-colored liquid from a table on his way. The pair of memory travelers followed him, watching closely as the past Lucius paused in the hallway, brow furrowed deeply and hands shaking, before he abruptly tossed back the liquid in the glass with a shudder, and strode into the next room. A fire roared there, and Lucius grabbed a handful of green powder from a vase on the floor.

"Thirteen Alban Street, Richmond on Thames."

Sirius gave a start at the other Lucius' side. "That's-"

"Your old apartment. Yes- we had already been seeing each other for two years at this point. Don't you-?"

He couldn't stop himself quite soon enough, and Sirius glared fiercely. "No. I don't remember."

Lucius was silent as the walls of the memory blurred into that of Sirius' old living room. It was decorated in umber and royal blue, with touches of red here and there to show Sirius' distaste of the pre-furnished rooms' style. Sirius emerged from an adjacent room, toweling his hair fiercely with a towel and wearing nothing but a pair of brilliant scarlet pajama bottoms.

Lucius' heart gave a pang, and he could not help but let his eyes flick back and forth between the past and the present. Azkaban had left its mark on Sirius, no doubt about that.

Sirius was tense as he watched the scene unfold, a pained look on his face, trying to recall the scene for himself.

"Lucius?" The younger man looked pleased at the man's abrupt arrival, if a little confused. "Everything alright?"

There was a hesitation- something that anyone else would've overlooked. But the twenty-something Sirius dropped the towel, stepped forward, and placed a hand on Lucius' face, concern etched into his face, any and all pretense gone. "Lucius?"

There was a long pause, and Lucius looked almost ready to speak when he shook his head. His hair fell into his eyes as he bowed his head, lifting a hand to cover Sirius'. "You know I love you."

"Of course," Sirius responded immediately, threading his fingers with Lucius'. "What's gotten into- mmph!"

Watching from Lucius' side, Sirius gasped. When the taller man tore his eyes away from their past selves' embrace, he saw the Gryffindor had averted his eyes, and was blushing more and more deeply by the second. "You've proven your point," Sirius said roughly, grimacing as his past self gave a heavy moan. "Let's move on already."

Lucius nodded, trying not to feel stung. "Very well." He reached out and gripped Sirius' arm, ignoring the way his friend jerked at the contact, and concentrated on the next memory.

Abraxas paced furiously, occasionally sending a disgusted look his son's way. "A task," He seethed, "A simple task, and yet you failed. For Merlin's sake, Goyle stumbling across it and blathering to you about it was a stroke of outrageous luck. Imagine if he hadn't! You are a disappointment, Lucius."

The blonde in question was cradling his left arm, looking extremely pale. None of his previous vigor remained, and he gave the occasional shudder, his fingers clenching on the fabric of his left sleeve.

"Oh, stop your whining," Abraxas snapped, looking revolted. "You've had worse."

But that wasn't true- he hadn't had worse, not worse than this. Nothing was worse than the feeling of terror that had flooded through him the first time he'd laid eyes on Lord Voldemort, or the feeling of shards of ice being woven through his skin at the touch of his master's wand on his forearm.

Lucius straightened his shoulders, though his head remained bowed. Abraxas shook his head in disgust, and left the room in a flurry of snowy robes. Sleet fell heavily through the study window, highlighted in the air where conjured lights patrolled the icy grounds. The study was dimly lit, the fire dying in the hearth, but as one of the lights drifted past the large panes of glass, a copy of the Prophet was illuminated on the table nearby.

The headline screamed:

Death Eaters Raid Wizarding Home, Six Dead.

Beneath the large black words were the pictures of the deceased, each one looking somber as they sent shifty looks at one another. Lucius only knew two of them- Amelia Bones' brother Edgar and sister Aurelia –but he had heard Sirius mention the other four. Emmeline Vance had been three years above Lucius in school, and Denny Diggle, Dedalus' only son, had only been brought up once or twice. The worst, however, were Fabian and Gideon Prewett, Molly Weasley's older brothers. Lucius had once hidden in a closet when they came calling at Sirius' apartment without warning, and had watched Sirius' smile widen genuinely when he opened the door.

He knew that if he tried to Floo to Sirius' now, he would arrive to find every member of the Order who had been staying at the old hideout sitting, shell-shocked, on the worn couches and on the kitchen counters. And with his arm still stinging with the memory of Voldemort's wand (or did it ever fade?) he doubted he would leave alive.

Lucius shuddered, hugging his arm more tightly to his chest and bitterly wishing he had changed sides when Sirius had asked. Now it was far, far too late.

He reached out blindly, almost knocking the bottle of Black Ice-Vodka he sought from the table where it sat. He unscrewed the cap, put the bottle to his lips and threw his head back, shuddering again as the liquid sent splinters of ice into his veins.

"I'm so sorry, Sirius."

From his perch near the fireplace, Sirius went rigid at the whispered words. At his side, Lucius' head was bowed, his and white-knuckled on his wand.

"Sh-shall we move on?" Sirius asked quietly, watching the taller man. With a jerky nod, Lucius grasped his arm and transported them to the next memory.

The rings were lined up in black cases, twelve across and six deep. Some were diamond-encrusted, while others were simple bands of some precious metal or another. Lucius stared into the cases from outside, the icy air slipping over his ears and reddening his cheeks. But he didn't mind- he was busy trying to imagine the look on Sirius' face if he were to propose.

Shock, probably- Lucius had never been very good at displays of love, and this certainly counted- but then what? Horror? Anxiety? Joy? Bewilderment?

One ring in particular glinted especially bright, throwing the others into shadow in Lucius' eyes. It was a white-gold circlet, with a small tag at the bottom explaining that the giver was meant to have a charm put on it so that a few choice words inscribed themselves on the inside of the loop whenever the ring was held by one of the married couple. But what would he say? What inside joke was clever enough, what few words could capture the two them?

"Lucius, you clever scoundrel! How in the name of Merlin did you find out?"

The blonde jerked upright, shock evident on his face for the split second it took to control his appearance. "Dolohov, I assure you I don't know what you mean."

"The engagement! Oh, it must've been Crabbe, he's the only one thick enough to spoil the surprise…"

"What on earth are you going on about?"

The large man's hearty grin faltered in the face of Lucius' polite confusion, lingered a moment longer, and abandoned him completely. "You really didn't know?"

Lucius shook his head, and Dolohov grimaced, running a hand through his hair. "Well, don't listen to anything I said, I mean-"

"What engagement?" Lucius asked icily.

The great Death Eater flinched, raising a hand in a placating gesture as he tried to summon his smile once more. "Hold up, don't do anything rash. But seriously, you can't tell anyone I told you this. It was supposed to be a surprise…"

"Get to the point!" Lucius snapped.

Dolohov looked sheepish, but his eyes glinted craftily. "You know, your father has been trying to set up an arranged marriage with you for quite some time. Now that you are one of-" Dolohov waited for a chatting couple to pass before continuing in a whisper, "One of the Dark Lord's chosen few, well, the pickings are a lot slimmer. But just this morning your father sealed the deal! You, my friend, are engaged to Narcissa Black."

Lucius was frozen as Dolohov grinned and clapped him on the shoulder. "You are one lucky bastard! Have you seen her recently? I mean, she was a year behind me- two in ahead of you, and she was cute then and all, but now- seriously, you could've gotten that Bulstrode girl…"

Engaged. Lucius was engaged. What on earth would he say to Sirius?

"…The entire Black family are huge supporters of You-Know-Who. Except for that one son of theirs, what's-his-name. Solomon? Sylvester?"

"Sirius," Lucius said numbly. He was getting married. To someone who most definitely was not who he wanted it to be.

"Obviously you'll be needing to propose in public, though- but you're looking in the wrong section! The women's rings are inside, she won't want something like this. Witches always like moonstones, or onyx. Diamonds are always nice, but I think they like this fancy, unique bollocks better. And it's not like you can't afford it!"

"Yes, of course," Lucius muttered faintly. His eyes strayed to the white-gold band a final time before Dolohov pulled him inside the store to show him some of the "better options."

The scene changed before Sirius had to ask.

"How could you do this to me? Do you have any idea what it was like to wake up, and find that this morning's paper's headline was you and- and-"

Sirius turned away, a hand over his eyes. Lucius was stuck to the floor near the fireplace. "You gave me no warning-"

"What was I supposed to say? I learned about this only two days ago-"

"Bollocks! You've been tiptoeing around me for nearly two months. If you're going to lie, then try to be a little more convincing."

"Sirius."

"No! Don't. I've figured it out for myself. You love her, you've finally found someone that you can parade around in public, you can become one of the Dark Lord's lapdogs now-" Lucius' eyes flickered, but Sirius didn't see. "You can get on with your life, with someone just as heartless and cold as you. I was a chapter, a stage, and I get it. Just don't try to- to convince me that you ever actually-"

"I love you. I always did. I always will."

Sirius stopped in his frantic pacing, staring at Lucius' face. Then in a blur of motion, he seized the nearest lamp and hurled it at the taller man's face. Lucius ducked just in time. The delicate clay base shattered on impact, and the magical light source gave a shockingly bright pulse as it was crushed against the wards.

"GET OUT!"

A picture came next, the glass shattering at it connected with the wall. Lucius found himself staring at himself and Sirius, laughing and clutching one another behind the webbed glass. Then the table that the pair of objects came flying across the room, clipping Lucius' head so that he staggered before it crashed to the floor, splintering, and Lucius was running for the door, dodging the hail of objects careening across the room towards him.

Jerking the handle, Lucius slammed the panel of wood behind him, resting against it, listening and breathing hard. There was a long silence, and then, when Lucius turned his head to angle his ear to the door, he could hear quiet sobs drifting through the door.

Sirius and Lucius were pulled along with the young Lucius as he disapparated, into what was recognizable to both of them as the old bedroom.

Lucius was still and silent for a long stretch of moments before, with a roar, he drew his wand and began blasting anything and everything in the room to pieces.

BANG! The chest of drawers was ripped apart at the seams.

BANG! The shelves of books went flying, sending flurries of paper into the air.

BANG! The lamps imploded with a simultaneous blast of white light.

BANG! The desk blew up from within, sending every scrap of paper within into the air.

BANG! The bed came apart, each leg severed from the frame, before the mattress swelled and burst, and fabric flew everywhere, mixing with torn, singed pieces of paper.

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! The chairs exploded, one by one.

Then there was stillness again, save for a few last feathers settling in amongst the debris. Lucius was frozen in the remnants of the maelstrom, wand still raised, for countless seconds, tears streaming silently down his cheeks, before his knees buckled and he pressed his face into his hands.

After that came a montage. Lucius and Sirius stood shoulder-to-shoulder and watched silently at the reel of scenes from Lucius' memory:

An Italian restaurant, where Lucius was seated with Narcissa, and he cast repeated looks at the dark-haired man in the opposite corner until he turned to order more wine, revealing his face, which was most certainly not Sirius'.

Then another restaurant, with Sirius, James, and Lily sitting together at the opposite end of the room. Lucius didn't hear a word Narcissa said the entire night.

Then a glimpse of Sirius on a street corner. This time they locked eyes for a moment before Sirius disapparated.

Then a news report Lucius was reading. Voldemort had killed the Potters. Sirius Black was being hunted. Lucius looked like he was dying more and more with every word he read- pale, so pale, and with dull eyes with dark bags beneath.

Then the worst. Sirius Black had been caught, and was being sent to Azkaban without going on trial.

At last, Lucius pulled them from the pensive.

Sirius shuddered, and took a deep breath. Lucius was a statue at his side, his head down, his face concealed by his long hair.

Lucius nodded, taking his hand from Sirius' arm. "You've done as I requested," he said in a dull monotone. "I'll take my leave, so as not to trouble you further."

And as Sirius stared after him in shock, he turned and walked out of the small room.

Sirius was rooted for several long seconds before he ran after him.

"Oy! You don't get to just walk away after showing me that," Sirius shouted at Lucius' back. The man stopped, but didn't turn.

"You really didn't know." Sirius said, watching intently as Lucius' shoulders tensed. "You didn't know about the engagement."

"It was as much a shock to me as it was to you." Lucius responded quietly.

"Alright. So that was then. Why are you here now?" Sirius demanded.

Lucius whirled around and sent Sirius a scathing look. He felt himself flush. "You can't possibly be saying-"

"Why isn't it possible?" Lucius stalked towards him. "Why is it so inconceivable to you that I could still love you? I never loved her, never felt an ounce of what we had. I would have come here the moment I heard you had escaped had it not been for Draco. My son does now deserve to have his entire life be revealed as a lie. I act only to protect him. Often, I am also protecting Narcissa as a result of that. But never, never because I love her. She is a friend, someone who has helped me numerous times, but I have hated her in just as many instances for what her arrival in my life meant for us." Lucius stopped, only a foot away. "Because she was pregnant with Draco, I stood by and watched you go to Azkaban, and that decision will haunt me until the day I die." Lucius' eyes were flaming, his voice low and urgent as he struggled to show Sirius years of torment through words and tone.

He took a deep breath. "I love you, Sirius. But I hurt you, badly, and if you want me to turn and walk out this door and never return, I will-"

Sirius surged forward and kissed Lucius, muffling any words that might have followed. Lucius wasted a single moment frozen with shock, and then was kissing Sirius back, molding their mouths together and tracing Sirius' lower lip with his tongue.

They broke away for air, and Lucius whispered, "I'm still a Death Eater, Merlin help me. I would move out in a heartbeat, Sirius, but I can't leave Draco at their mercy-"

"We'll find a way to save him," Sirius murmured, pressing his forehead to Lucius' and breathing a sigh of contentment. "We'll figure everything out."

*Turns into a puddle of fluff-induced mush* AWWW.

Note that there was no slash in this one. Sirius and Lucius don't get down and dirty until the sequel. Soooo... If ya wanna read some of THAT... You'll hafta read the next one. D Oh, Jester is so mean.

Alright. I THRIVE on reviews. The more reviews you kind, wonderful, generous people give me, the faster I write. The more motivated I am. Tell me what part you liked best, tell me how I could do better, tell me that you think Lucius and Harry should ditch these other fools and have a threesome with Voldemort, tell me anything!

Sincerely,

Jester.