PLEASE DON'T THINK I AM TRYING TO ROMANTICIZE SELF-HARM OR SUICIDE, THAT IS NOT MY INTENTION.
Once again, thank you Rachel for your help!
Loki could hear Natasha telling him not to panic and say something that he'd regret later, but paid her no attention. He managed to get out something along the lines of I'll talk to you later before hanging up and turning around.
Tony was leaning against the doorframe and his arms crossed against his naked chest. He ran a hand through his already messy hair before speaking again, this time more confidently. "Come on, it shouldn't exactly come as a surprise to you. In fact, I'm a tad insulted that you're this shocked."
Loki just stared at him. He blinked several times, quietly amazed, before finding the right words. "But… You don't do love. That's one of your rules." The crease between his brow deepened, something that Tony had always found to be insanely cute.
Tony snorted, and pushed himself off of the doorframe. "Please, I'm Tony Stark, I find exceptions to every rule." He walked over to Loki and placed his hands on his waist, quietly admiring the slight curve of the hips below his hands. "And you should really know by now that you're one of them. So look, I understand if you can't say it to my face, really, I do, and I don't care how long it takes for you to say it. Nor do I care that it's only been a month or so since we actually got together, because I've loved you for a lot longer than that, and I don't want to be afraid of admitting it anymore." Tony finished, his eyes locked on Loki's, scanning them for some sort of response.
Loki didn't say anything, but he did press his lips firmly to Tony's, surprising the older teen. He pulled away after several seconds and took a deep breath. "I love you. And no, I'm not saying it now because you've just said it to me. I'm saying it because I mean it, and I've always wanted to say it but I always thought it was unfounded." At Tony's raised eyebrows, Loki continued. "Well obviously I now know it's not." He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.
Smiling happily at him, Tony took his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze, something he was prone to doing. "And look," He began, leading Loki to a nearby couch. "I heard your conversation with Natasha. All of it. And I just want to say that I'm sorry if I ever made you feel that you have be up to a certain standard in order to sleep with me, because the reality is that I don't actually care about what you're like in bed. I love you, okay? And your performance in bed won't change that at all." He told Loki, looking completely serious. He hadn't realized how much it had actually been bothering Loki until he overheard his and Natasha's conversation. Pepper had told him that maybe the reason why Loki was being so weird about sex was because he was worried about what Tony might think of him, but he didn't actually think she was serious. This was Loki they were talking about, he had the most sexual prowess Tony had ever seen!
"I know, I know." Loki sighed. "I've had this conversation with Natasha already, I know I'm being stupid."
"I'm not saying it's stupid, I'm just saying that it's not true." Tony said, crossing his legs on the couch. "And quite frankly, if what we've done so far is anything to go by, I doubt you have anything to be worried about." He smirked,
Loki scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I've always found it interesting how you can go from caring so much about me to being a hedonist in less than ten seconds." He said, shaking his head.
"You know you love it." Tony teased, nudging him with his foot.
"You know I do." Loki replied, smiling softly. "Will that be all?" He asked hopefully.
Tony stretched, and gave him a lazy smile. "I guess so, you ready for bed?" Loki raised an eyebrow at this, so Tony quickly to corrected himself. "As in ready to go to sleep. Nothing too sexual, I promise."
Loki nodded and stood up. "Yup." He yawned, copying Tony and stretching like a cat. "I'm sorry for ruining your evening, I know you've been looking forward to this for a while." Loki apologized, as Tony stood up.
"It's fine. I'd rather you were ready for sex than not."
Loki made a frustrated sound. "You're making me out to be a virgin or something and I'm not! It's not that I'm not ready for sex, or that I don't want to have it, because I am, and I do. I just want it to be good." Loki reminded him, starting to walk out and towards the bedroom.
"Believe me, I'm well aware of the status of your virginity." Tony grinned, opening the bedroom door for him. "But I understand how you feel, and I get it. When the time is right, it will happen. But right now," Tony paused whilst he pulling Loki in for a gentle kiss. "You're shirtless and I get to subtly feel you up while we cuddle in bed." Tony smirked, running his hands down Loki's back for affect.
Loki rolled his eyes, but didn't shrug Tony's hands off. "You say that like it's a secret to me. And I never took you for the cuddling type." He said, eventually sliding out of Tony's grip to climb into bed, leaving the duvet cover folded back as an invitation for Tony to join him.
"I'm not." Tony replied defensively, but he smiled anyway.
"Liar." Loki pouted from the bed.
"Says you." Tony said with a smirk. He switched off the lights and hopped into the bed, arranging the duvet over them and lifting an arm up so that Loki could move in closer to him. Loki let out a contented sigh and wriggled around a bit until he was comfortable, before slinging an arm over Tony's waist. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep that night - it was a miracle that he'd slept so well the night before - so he ended up mumbling good night into his pillow as he closed his eyes and tried to relax his body.
Tony responded by kissing the top of Loki's head and closing his eyes as well. He was glad they'd worked things out, but there was still one part of Loki and Natasha's conversation that bothered him slightly.
Positions.
He'd never had to think about it that much before, usually when he slept with someone it kinda just came naturally. But with Loki, their personalities clashed a little too much, and that ended up making each of them think that the other was more "submissive". Tony didn't think of Loki as submissive because he was weak or anything, he just thought of himself as the more dominant one, the person that took the lead.
But apparently Loki disagreed
And Tony could see why he did, seeing as Loki had such little control over a lot of his life, it's only fair that he got control in the bedroom.
And, well, Tony would be lying if he said that didn't turn him on a little bit.
So he decided then and there that when they did have sex, he'd go with whatever Loki felt comfortable doing. There wasn't much to discuss, Tony knew that Loki would only talk to him about things he felt were necessary to talk about, at least when it came to sex and love, and even then it took persuasion from both him and Natasha to do so.
With one more kiss to a still-awake Loki's forehead, Tony relaxed his body and drifted off to sleep.
Tony knew he'd forgotten to do something before he went to bed that night. And now he was given a harsh reminder of what that was.
He'd forgotten to close the curtains.
He was woken up at eight, which was far too early by his standards, by sunlight streaming in through the unfiltered windows and immediately felt a headache coming on. Thank god he hadn't drunk too much the night before, or else he'd probably have the worst hangover ever. He now had to decide whether he should untangle himself from Loki and the sheets and close the curtains, or stay where he was and risk Loki getting angry about being woken up by the light. He debated what to do for about five minutes before grumpily realizing that he probably would have to get out of bed. It then took another three minutes of him trying to get out of bed for him to remember that he had an app on his phone that would close the curtains for him.
Grinning to himself, Tony closed the curtains and sank back into the bed, making sure not to disrupt Loki as he got comfortable. He didn't even know for sure that Loki was asleep, he had a habit of looking asleep but actually being awake, and although Tony was bored, he wanted Loki to get some sleep.
Loki chose that moment to turn over, his curly, raven hair splayed out across the pillow. Tony loved Loki's curly hair, it meant that Loki trusted him enough to let him see it and know that he wouldn't laugh at it, something that Thor was prone to doing. Not to mention that it made Loki look ten times hotter (or cuter, depending on how Tony felt). Unable to resist temptation, Tony reached out to thread his fingers through it, an action that brought to mind several similar memories, most of which consisted of some sort of sexual interaction between them.
He alternated between running his hands through Loki's hair and braiding bits of it for about ten minutes, before Loki began to stir and Tony immediately removed his hands. However, what he didn't realize was that Loki had woken up in the middle of Tony's hair-playing session and had remained still, only because he liked the feeling of Tony's hands in his hair and he was quite content to let him continue.
"Hey," Tony whispered as Loki turned over and faced him.
"Hey yourself." Loki replied, smiling sleepily at him. He closed the distance and kissed Tony lightly.
"Sleep much?" Tony inquired, once he'd pulled away.
With Loki's sleeping issues, it was no surprise when he shook his head. "Not really, no. But a shower would make me feel much more awake."
"You know, I'd be happy to join you in there." Tony suggested with a wiggle of his eyebrows as he moved closer to Loki.
"Wow, aren't you subtle?" Loki remarked, rolling his eyes and flinging the duvet off.
"So is that a yes?" Tony asked hopefully.
Loki snorted and ran his hands down Tony's chest, giving him goose bumps. "Well, now that we've discussed everything, I don't see why not."
Tony's eyebrows rose, and he began to smile widely until Loki interrupted his happy moment. "However," He smiled smugly, "I wish to go on the mountain first. Later, maybe?"
Tony groaned the same way he did everything – overdramatically. "You're such a little…" He trailed, thinking the better of it when he saw the expectant look on Loki's face. "Never mind." He sighed. "But now you have a promise to keep."
"Oh, I know." Loki smiled teasingly, biting his lip in an attempt to look seductive. "Now, where's the nearest snowboard rental place?"
Loki was pleased to see Tony's eyes widen as he answered. "Snowboard rentals, right." He replied, shaking his head. "Oh, didn't I mention? You're not going snowboarding."
Loki narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean I'm not going snowboarding? What do you expect me to do? Go sledding?"
"Go skiing." Tony replied simply.
"No." Loki replied immediately.
"Come on, it'll be fun! Plus I finally get to see you fail at something." Tony grinned. His attempts at persuasion weren't exactly the best.
"Fine. But just for today. And you have to promise not to laugh at me, I'm terrible at skiing and far more used to boarding." Loki warned, a playful darkness to his voice.
"Okay, I won't laugh. Well, not much." He dodged Loki's elbow. "Seeing as we're not showering together because someone's a tease, I'll meet you downstairs in twenty, alright?"
"Yeah, okay." Loki agreed, entering the bathroom and locking the door before Tony could join him.
Tony couldn't help himself. He couldn't hold it in any longer; he'd been trying all afternoon to avoid looking at Loki because that simply made it worse. He finally caved in.
He laughed. Loudly.
Loki had been having some trouble with his skis while they'd been on the mountain, anTony had managed to keep himself from laughing openly as Loki wobbled and tottered around, a look of mild terror on his face, but this time it slipped out before Tony could regret it. Loki had swerved violently at the bottom of the ski run and toppled over into a bank of snow with half a shout. Tony slid to a stop on his snowboard and removed his goggles several metres from where Loki's skis could be seen sticking out of the snow. He still hadn't surfaced from the bank yet, but Tony knew he was okay because the snow wasn't quaking with his efforts to escape.
"You okay in there, frosty?" Tony called, still laughing at the noise that Loki had made. If he hadn't been bending over clutching his ribs he might have seen that Loki had turned the snow bank to his advantage, but Tony only realized when the first snowball smacked him on the head. He yelped more at the sudden cold than the impact and shielded his head just in time to partially ward off the second missile.
Loki had no intention of ceasing, and lobbed another three snowballs at Tony as he struggled to unclip from his snowboard and run for cover behind another nearby bank of snow. He grinned with satisfaction as two hit him in the back and one in the ribs before he leaped over the convenient shelter. It wasn't long before Loki felt retaliatory projectiles hitting his snow bank, and he ducked his head lower as a soft spray of snow flew overhead.
There was a pause for a few moments and Loki quickly made himself an arsenal of snowballs to throw, but when he popped his head up he saw that Tony had not been idle in those moments.
He had rushed out and kicked the snow into place, tossing more handfuls of snow over from the side he was crouched behind, shaping it into an effective fort and had shoved his snowboard down into the middle of it so that he could stand up and hide behind it.
Loki pursed his lips and waited for the telltale sign of Tony's shoulder inching out before throwing his snowball and catching Tony full in the face. He let out a muffled yell, but could still hear Loki's laughter.
"That was for laughing at me when you promised not to!" Loki yelled, ducking behind his own poorly shaped fort.
"Hey, I said that I wouldn't laugh much!" Tony yelled back, quickly shaping up a few snowballs himself.
"True, but you laughed loudly. I heard you from in this damn pile of snow!"
Tony laughed again and stood up behind his snowboard, peeking his head around and throwing three snowballs in quick succession when he saw the top of Loki's dark head peek over the top of his shelter. The was a muffled curse and a satisfying thud, letting Tony know that at least one of his projectiles had hit it's target.
"You'll pay for that!"
Tony waited behind his shelter, leaning his back against the hard-packed snow to brace it as Loki fired several more snowballs at it. He had an idea as he sat with his head ducked, watching his snowboard wobble under the force of Loki's thrown snowballs. He stood up making sure he was shielded as much as possible behind the snowboard and yanked it out from where he had embedded it in the snow then ducked back down behind his fort with it.
"What, are you going to play baseball with me now?" Loki asked as another snowball flew over Tony's head.
"Something like that," Tony yelled as he vaulted over the top of his fort, holding the snowboard in front of himself diagonally as he charged towards Loki's fort.
He leapt over the little hillock of snow, his feet not quite clearing the top of it so a shower of snow landed with him. He tossed away the snowboard and rolled onto Loki, pinning him down, his dark hair flecked with flakes of white snow.
"Your lips look cold," Tony said. "Can't have that. I'll have to warm them up." Tony leaned in and kissed Loki there in the chilly remains of the fort, but their down jackets kept them warm enough.
Tony eventually pulled away lest their lips get frozen together.
"Come on, let's head back to the base. You've proven that you're skiing skills are as terrible as you made them out to be."
Loki shoved his shoulder so that Tony rolled off him, and then pressed a handful of snow into Tony's face for good measure.
"I hate you."
"That's not what you'll be saying later." Tony grinned as he wiped the snow off his face.
"Shut up." Loki muttered, standing back up. "I'm just glad you managed to book the entire ski run for the entire day."
"Yeah, too bad I'm the only one that witnessed that spectacular fall."
"You're never going to let me live that down, are you?" Loki sighed, trudging back to the base and inwardly cursing at his ski boots for feeling like hell in boot form.
"Nope!" Tony said, popping the "p" and wrapping an arm around Loki. "You were improving towards the end, though. You only fell over what, five times in the second to last run?"
Loki growled, and pushed Tony's arm off of him. "I told you, I'm a snowboarder, not a skier."
"No offence, but that's pretty obvious." Tony snickered as they walked inside the main building. They returned their equipment, and Loki would be lying if he said he was sad to see his ski boots go. "You want to go back to the villa now or into town?"
"Villa. I believe I have a promise to keep." Loki said, his voice light, but when his eyes flicked to Tony's they sparkled with mischief.
Tony's heart skipped a beat. "Yup, villa it is."
Yay! Sex scene next! The reason why this took so long to update was because I was struggling to write it. Would you rather I actually wrote it or if it was inferred...