Hi, so here is another chapter. I apologise for the lateness but I have been busy with exams and therefore I have had to put this on hold for a while. However here is the chapter that concludes the Neverland arc.
I want to pay tribute in this chapter to the wonderful cast of OUAT that will be leaving us in Season 7. While I do look forward to a new season of OUAT I worry how that will happen without the wonderful cast that we have gotten used to seeing everyday. I want to thank, Ginny, Josh, Emile, Jared and Rebecca for their wonderful interpretations of their characters that they have given us. For showing that heroes were flawed, that villains were not all evil, that the Disney Princesses could be powerful and that a kid with enough belief could change the world. I wish each actor a long and happy future.
I want to pay special attention however to Jennifer Morrison who has played the role of Emma Swan for six years-Emma Swan was a special kind of hero for me. She was kickass and vulnerable all at the same time and she came into my life and writing at a time when I really needed her so I wish Jennifer Morrison all the best of luck. I hope OUAT continues to deliver it's great episodes over season 7 with Colin, Lana and Robert staying.
Ok so now that's done-on with the story.
Disclaimer-Nothing is mine.
Depending on how the last episode of Season 6 is I will probably leave this story at Season 5 for which I have complete notes for.
Disclaimer-Nothing is mine.
Please Read and Review.
Paradise Lost
Chapter 25-The Heart Of The Matter
The last of the Neverland arc-In which a strangely made up family rush to stop Pan and save Henry, Killian comes to an understanding with his feelings. Giselle and Killian come to an understanding and as a new curse and a terrible price is paid to defeat Pan, Scarlett Gold remembers the first time she met young Henry and how he disrupted her life.
"It doesn't matter who my father was. It matters who I remember he was" (Anne Sexton)
Neverland. Killian's Perspective.
Whoever came up with saying that the heart of the matter was the most important thing, or whatever the saying was, was clearly an idiot Killian decided, either that or whoever it was did not have children.
Pan's plan was two parts insane and one part brilliant. Killian had only known the lad Henry for a short while and even he could see that convincing him to give up his heart to save something bigger than him was probably the only way to get him to comply. His home was built on magic, his faith was built on magic, and his family had been brought together due to Henry and his faith.
But he could understand as well, Emma's horror and fury at the thought that her son was going to give up his heart to a madman who only wanted to save himself.
But that was not what was dominating his thoughts. Henry was of course a concern. But his concern first and foremost had to be his own daughter who had taken her booted foot and smashed through what he had thought was the fragile coverings of his heart.
Well he had to give her some credit or perhaps himself. It seemed there was more him in her than he had ever thought. She too like him seemed to hold so much resentment towards her father and unlike him, he could understand why. He had done all of what she had accused him off. If he had been half the man that he had claimed to be he would have gone looking for her.
And he had given her nightmares. She had tried to kill him.
That was going to keep him up for a while he knew. He also knew what he would have done had she gone through with her plan to kill him. He would have either listened to her or simply ran her through and the thought made his stomach turn. He shook his head and tried to block out what she would have looked like, fourteen with mud on her boots and that look that had once attracted him to Milah in her eye as she held a knife to his throat.
He could have killed her. The man he was back then he probably would have.
He had given her nightmares, she had seen him as a monster.
And more to the point he didn't know how to make it right. How do you plan to put back a lifetime of loss and regret and a dangerously powerful love that so many people could not understand? He had loved his daughter, had lived for her and had grieved for her, all at the same time and now he did not know how to make things better when it seemed like every step they were taking forwards was accompanied by two steps back.
Filled with self-loathing he swallowed the bile in his throat and he tried to focus on the path in front of him so that he could get back to his ship, his ship that guaranteed safety and he hoped an escape route. Emma and Regina along with Bae had all gone looking for Henry, all desperate to save the boy that they all loved, that they all had a stake in. he on the other hand was to go and get the ship ready while Snow and Charming tried to keep the Lost Ones together and the Dark One was attempting to get together some sort of antidote so the Prince could live once they left this infernal place.
Giselle meanwhile had stuck to his side like a barnacle on the bottom of his ship. Killian couldn't blame her, hell he couldn't blame her for being disgusted with him, as far as he was concerned, in terms of fatherly love he was so far down the totem pole it was a miracle he was still being graced with Giselle's presence.
Giselle meanwhile was steadfastly ignoring him. And it hurt, by all the Gods it hurt.
"Are you alright?" Tinkerbell asked as she walked through the undergrowth back to the ship.
"No" he said because that was the truth and he wasn't sure that he could tell Tink the entire story, he wasn't sure he could bare telling the story to her. He could barely imagine the story himself.
He would make it up to his daughter that much he knew. He would become a man that she would one day be proud to call her father and he wanted that day to come sooner rather than later. He wasn't sure that he even wanted to talk about it, or even think about it. Perhaps it was better that she went back to Gold, in his cycle of self-loathing he wondered if that was the better option, if he was to take a step back, stop trying to be something he wasn't.
Good God Killian, he thought scathingly his own thoughts dominating every step he took. In what world did you think that you could be a good father?
He got back to his ship and stormed down to his cabin as Tink set about making a blanket fort on the deck for the Lost Boys should they get tired. He slammed into the room that had that damn crib in the centre and then felt his legs give in.
His daughter hated him.
He was on the floor for a long time. And Tink, merciful Tink left him to his misery.
Neverland. Giselle's Perspective.
It was her father who broached the subject. It was the Dark One who turned to her and watched her with those eyes that had both haunted her and comforted her for so many years in equal measure.
"So" he said as he carefully weighed out enough of the water so that David could get home to Storybrooke in one piece. "You want to tell me what's going on or do I have to guess?"
Again there was no pretence about his tone. She dithered. In truth she didn't want to tell him about Edmund. That part was still too private though she suspected that what with him seeing into the future and all he probably knew all about that particular problem all too well.
So instead she told him all about the year where she had been alone. Well...she omitted a few truths but he got the general gist, at least she could say that. Including the bit where she had tried to kill Hook and the part where she had told him that she hated Emma Swan for breaking the curse even though it had sort of brought back Bae.
He was silent for a long time.
"Well" he said finally. "You are a mess aren't you?"
There was something in his tone that made the walls that Giselle had so carefully built up while on this infernal island came tumbling down. Her father perhaps seeing it opened his one arm that wasn't working on the water and Giselle slipped under it leaning his head against his shoulder.
"I think I want to come home again" she said finally. Her father smirked without mirth or amusement. "I know" he said in a tone of supreme smugness. He had of course she knew foreseen this. She found that it did not bother her as much as it had done before.
This was her Father.
This was where she felt safe.
For better or worse.
And it was that, that forced her to get back to her other's father's ship so that they could leave this shithole, Henry intact and go back to attempting to build their lives.
How the hell she was to do that however Giselle had no idea.
But she knew that getting home in one piece was the first step to rebuilding her shattered life into something worth living.
She knew that it wasn't Henry's fault that he had the Heart of the Truest Believer but she couldn't help but feel irritated. Ever since he had talked about curses to her it seemed her life was on some random downwards spiral that Scarlett Gold couldn't comprehend.
But Giselle Jones could, now.
And she hated it.
Storybrooke. The First Curse. Scarlett's Perspective
Scarlett Gold had woke up grumpy. Well it wasn't really her fault. How was she supposed to know that Regina was gonna need her to babysit her kid over the summer because apparently she was the only one that she could trust? Or as the other woman put it, the only one that was 'semi-raised right'. How was she supposed to know that she would be called in early on her first day because Regina had apparently decided she needed to get to the office so that she could watch the planting of her new tree in the courtyard herself?
Seriously the woman was obsessed with apples it was unnerving.
She had known Henry of course, you couldn't live in Storybrooke and not know the adopted boy of the Mayors who had cinnamon on his cocoa and had found out just this summer that he was adopted. Scarlett had tried to tell him that she was adopted too and that she had been just fine with never knowing who her biological parents were, that being adopted had never made her question the love she knew her father held for her but the kid was obsessed with finding out who his real Mom was and ignored Scarlett when she pointed out that it was Regina who loved him even if she didn't show it very well.
Instead she kicked on her rattiest pair of leggings and an old royal blue jumper and boots and stomped downstairs looking for her boots. Her father had claimed that those boots would be the end of his other leg if she didn't move them and she found one under the table and one near her bag. He had obviously gone out to open the shop early but she left a note and grabbed her keys. Regina always had something in the fridge and Scarlett knew Henry always like going to Granny's especially after an hour or two climbing that bloody castle thing that she could never imagine staying up in a good storm.
Instead she got to the Mills residence to find Regina already in her car. She scowled at her and Scarlett decided this was probably not the best time to ask Regina if she was getting paid for this time spent with a hyperactive nine year old. Instead she ducked in the door and tried to shake of the phantom feel of Regina's hard eyes digging in her back.
"Hey" she said coming round the corner into the dining room to see Henry sat at one of the hard chairs reading a book.
"Hey" he said back and she noticed he was reading a book of fairy tales. Who the fuck had thought that was a good idea for a nine year old?
"You wanna go out today?" she said already turning Regina's expensive coffee maker on.
"No" Henry said not looking up. "I wanna read this"
Scarlett thought it was strange but in honesty she was more than happy. It looked like it was going to rain, she had an essay to finish and she was tired. So she kicked off her shoes and left Henry reading in the kitchen.
Since when were fairy tales so captivating anyway?
Neverland. The Jolly Roger.
Somehow they had made it. They had made it back on the ship, Henry had had his heart restored, Bae and her father had hugged it out and they were heading home everyone they could find in toe.
They were alive.
At this point all Giselle wanted was a shower, a coffee, a grilled cheese and a bed and she was finally able to get that.
Killian had just offered Henry his bed for the night. The Lost Boys would be sleeping on the deck under the watchful eye of Tink and Bae. Emma, Snow White, David and Regina were all taking one of the crew's cabins and her father was taking the other. Giselle supposed she was to sleep with him and Wendy who had wrapped herself in a blanket and had been taken for a cup of tea by Snow White who had seen her shaking and confused look and took pity on her. Gods knows where Hook was planning to sleep if he was.
Instead she moved her feet sluggish to where he was standing on the prow of the ship his eyes watching the wheel. Regina's magic and a combination of Pan's shadow had made the wheel turn itself as it navigated the ship home and while they were off the water and in the air Giselle got the impression that the Captain was nervous about it.
She wanted to say something that could convey her feelings but Giselle had never been a woman that could do something like that. So instead she said the first thing that came to her mind and damned the consequences-like that hadn't been the one thing that had gotten her into this mess of feelings in the first place.
"You would have been enough" she said softly. He turned to stare at her and she realised with a horrible pang that for the first time she could see the resemblance to him and her. She had always tried to claim that she looked like her mother but stood here she realised that she could no longer deny that.
"This..." she looked around the ship. "This would have been enough" she scuffed her boot along the deck.
"I wish...I wish I didn't feel the way I do. I do because I know it's not your fault. I wish things could have been different I do but..." she gave a little shrug.
"Anyhow" she said feeling braver. "Hate me, don't hate me, I just wanted you to know that had things had turned out differently I think I would have been very happy to call you father"
And with that she turned around to walk downstairs to where there was a lumpy mattress and a blanket, a night's sleep and the promise of home.
Storybrooke. Present Day
They were home. Giselle still couldn't believe it. They were home in Storybrooke and the dingy little town had never looked better. Giselle staggered off and half fell off the damn ship feeling solid ground beneath her feet rather than sand.
She saw her father hug Belle and Bae curled one hand around her waist and pulled them forwards her father's cane in his hand until the four of them were in some sort of messy hug. Hell at this point Giselle would hug Belle simply because that island had been so unimaginable that she could almost find herself being happy to see her father's girlfriend again.
Almost.
She turned then and without warning stepped back. Nobody seemed to notice and she turned around to see Killian standing there in the background steadfastly staring at his boots.
And she did it without warning. She pushed past Emma who didn't look up until she was standing in front of him and then she hugged him.
Well, more like threw herself into his arms but a hug was a hug right?
It took him a second and then his hands were around her one on the small of her back and the other on her shoulders and she realised from the way he gave a small wounded noise that the poor bastard had reconciled himself to the thought of never having this. That she would never want to be touched by him or hugged by him or comforted by him. And she found that she wanted more of these moments like this with him. It wasn't better than her father's hugs, it was just different.
Damn.
All too late she was letting go and collapsing back into her bed. She could barely remember walking back to the house, hell she might have been puffed there because Emma had decided that everyone needed one good night's sleep or at least a shower and a few hours' sleep before they celebrated.
And with that she found herself curled in bed and fast asleep before her head even hit the pillow.
The next day however, everything promptly went to shit.
Blue was dead, the shadow was back and more importantly Pan was back.
In Henry's body.
And he was her grandfather.
She didn't remember hearing that little anecdote and she reminded herself to ask her father what the fuck he thought he was doing but there was no time when he was standing in the middle of the town with his dagger and a look of vicious glee on his face as he took in her grandfather's final moments. Or so it seemed.
There was a second where she stood there watching what seemed like another effortless defeat of another villain by her father. The ultimate one.
The misunderstood one.
And then something changed.
He looked at Bae long and hard, looked at Belle and gave her what seemed like one last offering of love and then he looked at her and winked once. Giselle stared at him, what the hell was he playing at?
There was a pause and then he dove the dagger, his dagger into Pan's back and it was like magic itself seemed to scream as the world was ripped in two. There was a long pause and then he was...gone...
And Giselle knew as her insides churned in anguish and a staggering grief seemed to crash upon her that her mischievous, demonic and yet somehow always loving father was dead.
Belle was screaming her whole body on the floor and Bae looked staggered. Regina had all but lost her footing, this had been her teacher and confidant for a long time and she looked like the rug had been pulled out from under her feet.
Giselle took this in and then realised that her legs couldn't keep her up. Her mind was a whitewash of grief and they went out under her without her even realising. Someone caught her and pressed her to the floor her knees falling under her effortlessly. She shuddered and felt someone press their lips into her hair patting it down as she shivered back the howls of grief and choked on her silent sobs.
It took her disconnected brain a long second to realise that it was Killian who had just seen the death of his long-time rival and had thought of nothing but her.
He was the only parent she had left and the whole idea of that felt disgustingly wrong.
They were talking, the heroes, Emma's blonde hair whipping around her and Giselle found that she hardly cared.
She didn't care that Storybrooke was soon to be disappearing, she didn't care that they were somehow at the town line, and that they were leaving Emma and Henry forever. That her...that Killian had let her go so he could go and say goodbye to what she supposed was the second great love of his life. She didn't feel Henry hug her or Emma look at her. The woman didn't approach her and for that she supposed she should be happy because if she had done Giselle would have probably killed her.
The grief she was feeling was nothing against the anger she felt for this woman and this boy for coming into town and ruining her life time and time again. She doubted she would ever forgive Emma Swan for being the saviour. Ever.
She saw the purple cloud approach and found that Killian was on her other side not moving but not touching her either, as if the grief swirling inside of her was too powerful for him to be near. As if he wasn't sure what to do, as if Giselle had the answers. How the hell was she supposed to have the answers to this?
She didn't let the tears fall though. And when the purple cloud came and the yellow car was gone she only wished that instead of taking them back to the Enchanted Forest the damn thing would kill them all, would kill her instead.
Next Chapter-In which we see what Giselle and Killian got up to in the year that went missing and we see what transpired between the two during their time in New York. Major bonding.
Hope you all enjoy.