Chapter Twenty Four
"Is it finished?" Morgause asked Morgana later that night. Morgana closed her bedroom door and went into the bathroom and turned on the tap.
"It is," she said with a grin, "soon we will have our revenge."
"Not so fast Morgana," Morgause chided, "planting the virus was the easy part. We have yet to wait five months without being caught."
"They will not catch us," she waved off Morgause's concern.
"Do not think just because the virus is nearly flawless that we are above making mistakes." She said impatiently, "you mustn't let them suspect you when the time comes. It is your duty now to convince everyone of your innocence, to make them all believe that you, Morgana Pendragon could never be capable of such a thing. At the same time, you must raise suspicion of Arthur. You must find a way to make people doubt him but be careful, if they feel you are trying to turn anyone against him it will be you they mistrust." She carefully instructed her, she would not let Morgana fail.
"How can I make them see Arthur for what he really is? They are loyal to him; I do not have their loyalty." Morgana frowned; it was frustrating the way that everyone loved Arthur and how hard she had to work to get anyone's respect. Everything was so easy for Arthur.
"That, I cannot tell you, you will need to find a way to plant the seeds of doubt on your own." Morgause said regretfully.
"I will." Morgana sighed, she would find a way to do what she had to, she always did.
"You should go now. Do not call me unless it is an emergency. We do not want anyone to know we are in communication."
"Alright. Thank you Morgause, for everything." Morgana meant it very deeply, without Morgause; she would not have survived the past six months. They had come across each other's path in LA purely by coincidence. Morgause was visiting a friend and had been shopping in a store the same time as Morgana. When Morgana saw her, she had said hello, not thinking anything of it. But Morgause had pulled her aside, telling her how much she regretted Uther's decision about sending her here and how little he appreciated her. Her words had been comforting and they started to talk a lot more. Morgause was a business woman who had had to claw, scratch and climb her way to her position, and still she had to fight against the men who would see her in her 'rightful place'. She understood all too well what it was like for Morgana working under the yoke of someone like Uther. Morgana admired Morgause and everything she had achieved in her life and she sought advice. Eventually, the conversations turned from giving friendly advice to expressing their equal distaste for Uther and Camelot. Morgause only remained on the board because the company provided such a large profit for her but she had expressed that she would not miss it if the company were to suddenly go under. Morgana had told her how much she wished that it would happen. The only problem for them was that they both needed the money it provided. Morgana needed it because unlike Arthur, she did not have that large of a savings. It was by far larger than the average person's, but it certainly wasn't enough to live off of. Also both of them had such a large amount of stalk in the company that if it were to suddenly go belly up, they would lose everything. It was then that Morgana had made a joke about running off with the company's money and leaving it to burn. Morgause had not laughed but instead made her an offer that she could not refuse.
"Good night my love," Morgause said and Morgana hung up. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and clenched her jaw. She had been so naive all of her life, thinking that she could earn Uther's respect, that she would be able to find a way for him to finally treat her the same as Arthur. For so long she had pushed herself to be better, to be perfect but it was never enough. Always, Arthur would find a way to out shine her, to do it better than her. It was humiliating and she could not take it anymore.
"Morgana?" Mordred knocked softly on her bedroom door. She grabbed her robe and threw it on as she answered the door.
"Yes Mordred?" She asked with a smile and he smiled warmly at her.
"I thought I heard you come in, I just wanted to make sure you got settled in alright. I haven't left your space too much of a mess, I hope."
"Not at all Mordred, everything is perfect and I'm so happy that you're here."
"Ok," he smiled that little boy smile that Morgana had loved since she met him. He was such a sweet boy who had seen so much, what she didn't know exactly, he was not one to share but she knew he had nevertheless.
"Goodnight Mordred," she bid him goodnight and he nodded, turning away and walking down the hall to his room. He had moved his things into the second guest room. It was smaller but it still had its own bathroom and it even had a better view of the park which he liked more than the view of the city from Morgana's room.
Mordred closed his bedroom door and stared into the darkness. He let out a deep breath and then pulled his clothes off, tossing them over the chair in the corner and pulling on his pajama pants. He flicked on the lamp by the desk and looked around the room. It was a lot like the master bedroom, just smaller. There was a small entry way to the room that separated the bathroom from the bedroom. To the left was the bedroom where the first half was more of an office than a bedroom. The walls were lined with bookcases and a large desk sat against the wall. In the corner was a comfortable dark blue chair and footstool with a little coffee table. The floor was hardwood for the office half of the room but changed to a thick cream colored rug. The large queen canopy bed sat at an angle in the corner, the white sheer curtains were pulled back and tied to the posts. It was an inviting bed with a warm green duvet and white pillows. The room was decorated with various shades of green, cream and white and reminded Mordred of a forest. He wasn't sure why he didn't take this room from the beginning. In fact, he really didn't know why he took Morgana's room at all. He just hadn't even considered any other room. That thought disturbed him and he shook his head and climbed in between the blankets. He didn't think he'd manage to sleep at all but considering he hadn't slept more than two hours the night before and none before that, he was asleep in minutes.
o.O.o.O.o
"Can you believe Morgana?" Merlin asked as he lay next to Arthur, looking up at the ceiling while Arthur lay on his side, propped up on his elbow with his head in his hand.
"What do you mean?" He asked, lazily tracing the curves of Merlin's torso with his fingers.
"She's so different," He said, not sure if he should mention that he thought it wasn't a good difference but he wanted to know if Arthur had noticed the change too.
"She seems to have grown up a bit," He replied and Merlin laughed.
"Morgana grow up? Arthur I think Morgana has been 'grown up' since she could speak! No, she isn't more grown up she's... harder." He said hesitantly and Arthur met his eyes.
"Well her job is difficult and anyone would struggle dealing with the stress but she has it worse than most. Not only is she a woman working in a male dominant work environment but she's a Pendragon. My family has not made their wealth by making friends and we're known for being rather ruthless. Honestly, it isn't surprising that she has to shut herself down in order to survive." He explained and Merlin considered his words.
"Is it hard for you?" He asked, looking over at him.
"Yea," he nodded a sad look on his face, "it's incredibly hard to care. It's something I always struggled with. I always cared too much and it always gets me into trouble. For a long time I shut everything off, it was the only way I could do what was expected of me and live with myself." He said honestly, "but having you in my life has made it a lot easier. You don't let me shut down," he said with a gentle kiss to Merlin's lips.
"I'm glad. You have a big heart; I would hate to see you close that off." He sighed happily and closed his eyes; Arthur curled up beside him and rested his arm across his chest. He asked no more questions, they were both exhausted and in that moment, it didn't seem all that important anymore anyway.
o.O.o.O.o
Mordred was exceptionally agitated Merlin noticed the next day. He would let his face slip every now and then when he thought no one was looking and he would have such a dark scowl Merlin desperately wanted to know what was bothering him. Was it having Morgana back? Did something happen last night when she got home? Had she said something to bother him? Or was it not at all related to Morgana? He was dying to ask him but Mordred would not be alone with Merlin. It became apparent that he was actively avoiding Merlin part way through the day and he couldn't figure out why. Had Merlin said something? The tension was still there between them but he had hoped they would be able to move past it after all this time. Mordred still subtly flirted almost on a daily basis but that day, he wasn't even looking at Merlin. Finally after Mordred had completely ignored Merlin's talking to him, he had had enough.
"Mordred!" Merlin snapped but Mordred pretended to not hear him. He angrily chewed his tongue as he stood in the hallway watching Mordred walk away. This was getting ridiculous. He was his boss! He couldn't just ignore him like this, it was completely unprofessional! And it was also really starting to hurt Merlin's feelings.
Merlin stormed after him, looking down several hallways before locating him talking to Freya, a girl from finance just outside the supplies closet. He stood by the corner, waiting for them to finish talking. When Freya turned around and walked the other direction, Merlin trudged down the hallway towards Mordred.
"Mordred," he nearly shouted and grabbed his arm. He could hear someone coming down the hall but needed to talk to him now before he could get away again. Looking around, he quickly shoved Mordred into the closet and shut the door.
"Open that door Emyrs," Mordred hissed when Merlin faced him.
"No," Merlin spat and folded his arms across his chest, "why are you cross with me?" Mordred growled and ran his hands through his hair.
"Emyrs..." he seethed and Merlin had to resist the urge to slap him.
"What is your problem Mordred?!"
"You know what!" He shouted back and Merlin moved back at the rage in his words.
"Mordred," Merlin sighed, "come on, can't we be civil?"
"Open the door Merlin," he said. Merlin's name sounded strange coming from him, he never used it and Merlin could hear the bit of Romanian accent in the 'r'.
"Why?" He asked and Mordred closed the distance between them.
"Don't be a fool Merlin, we both know that Arthur is a better man than me." He said not really answering Merlin's question but saying what he really needed to say instead.
"How..." Merlin stammered and Mordred rolled his eyes.
"I'm not an idiot Emyrs; I've known Arthur was your boyfriend for months now."
"Did...did we do something?" He asked, desperate to know how many other people knew.
"No, don't worry; I don't think anyone else knows except Morgana. I only know because you look at Arthur the way I wish you'd look at me." Merlin gulped at his words.
"I'm sorry Mordred."
"Don't be," He smiled that strange smile of his; a smile so twisted with bitter sweet pain, "you deserve someone who's a lot better than me and Arthur is definitely a better man."
"Don't say that," Merlin frowned, Mordred was a good man too but he just quietly laughed and brushed a stray hair behind Merlin's ear.
"A good man wouldn't be trying to steal away someone else's man." He whispered and Merlin nodded, that was true.
"I'm not someone anyone can steal," he replied lamely and backed away from Mordred.
"No, you're not. You're a good person, pure and you would never do anything to hurt someone you love. But give me some kindness," he pleaded, stepping closer yet, "do not pretend that you do not know how I feel about you Emyrs."
"But I don't know!" Merlin growled as he glared at him, "I know that you're attracted to me, that you want me but that's all I know. Despite the fact that I feel like I can read your mind most days, I can't when it comes to me. You confused me Mordred; I don't know what you feel about me." He rambled and Mordred just stared at him, that same blank look as always.
"Merlin," He whispered and cupped his cheek with his hand, "I am in love with you. That is how I feel about you. I love you; I love all of you, every part of you. I love the way you clench your hair when you're frustrated; the way that you bite your lip when you're scared or nervous. I adore the way that your lips move when you read to yourself and the way that you always listen to everyone. I love the way that your pants always seem to barely be hanging onto your hips, the way that I can see your stomach when you wear your t-shirts. I love the way that you always see me and yet you never look away. You see who I am, you see all of me and yet you don't recoil, you don't turn away. I love the way you make me feel so warm. You are the fire while I am freezing to death and I love how big your heart is. I love how deeply you care for everyone, how loyal you are. I love you from head to toe, mind to soul." He said breathlessly.
AN: Chapter Twenty Four
"Is it finished?" Morgause asked Morgana later that night. Morgana closed her bedroom door and went into the bathroom and turned on the tap.
"It is," she said with a grin, "soon we will have our revenge."
"Not so fast Morgana," Morgause chided, "planting the virus was the easy part. We have yet to wait five months without being caught."
"They will not catch us," she waved off Morgause's concern.
"Do not think just because the virus is nearly flawless that we are above making mistakes." She said impatiently, "you mustn't let them suspect you when the time comes. It is your duty now to convince everyone of your innocence, to make them all believe that you, Morgana Pendragon could never be capable of such a thing. At the same time, you must raise suspicion of Arthur. You must find a way to make people doubt him but be careful, if they feel you are trying to turn anyone against him it will be you they mistrust." She carefully instructed her, she would not let Morgana fail.
"How can I make them see Arthur for what he really is? They are loyal to him; I do not have their loyalty." Morgana frowned; it was frustrating the way that everyone loved Arthur and how hard she had to work to get anyone's respect. Everything was so easy for Arthur.
"That, I cannot tell you, you will need to find a way to plant the seeds of doubt on your own." Morgause said regretfully.
"I will." Morgana sighed, she would find a way to do what she had to, she always did.
"You should go now. Do not call me unless it is an emergency. We do not want anyone to know we are in communication."
"Alright. Thank you Morgause, for everything." Morgana meant it very deeply, without Morgause; she would not have survived the past six months. They had come across each other's path in LA purely by coincidence. Morgause was visiting a friend and had been shopping in a store the same time as Morgana. When Morgana saw her, she had said hello, not thinking anything of it. But Morgause had pulled her aside, telling her how much she regretted Uther's decision about sending her here and how little he appreciated her. Her words had been comforting and they started to talk a lot more. Morgause was a business woman who had had to claw, scratch and climb her way to her position, and still she had to fight against the men who would see her in her 'rightful place'. She understood all too well what it was like for Morgana working under the yoke of someone like Uther. Morgana admired Morgause and everything she had achieved in her life and she sought advice. Eventually, the conversations turned from giving friendly advice to expressing their equal distaste for Uther and Camelot. Morgause only remained on the board because the company provided such a large profit for her but she had expressed that she would not miss it if the company were to suddenly go under. Morgana had told her how much she wished that it would happen. The only problem for them was that they both needed the money it provided. Morgana needed it because unlike Arthur, she did not have that large of a savings. It was by far larger than the average person's, but it certainly wasn't enough to live off of. Also both of them had such a large amount of stalk in the company that if it were to suddenly go belly up, they would lose everything. It was then that Morgana had made a joke about running off with the company's money and leaving it to burn. Morgause had not laughed but instead made her an offer that she could not refuse.
"Good night my love," Morgause said and Morgana hung up. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and clenched her jaw. She had been so naive all of her life, thinking that she could earn Uther's respect, that she would be able to find a way for him to finally treat her the same as Arthur. For so long she had pushed herself to be better, to be perfect but it was never enough. Always, Arthur would find a way to out shine her, to do it better than her. It was humiliating and she could not take it anymore.
"Morgana?" Mordred knocked softly on her bedroom door. She grabbed her robe and threw it on as she answered the door.
"Yes Mordred?" She asked with a smile and he smiled warmly at her.
"I thought I heard you come in, I just wanted to make sure you got settled in alright. I haven't left your space too much of a mess, I hope."
"Not at all Mordred, everything is perfect and I'm so happy that you're here."
"Ok," he smiled that little boy smile that Morgana had loved since she met him. He was such a sweet boy who had seen so much, what she didn't know exactly, he was not one to share but she knew he had nevertheless.
"Goodnight Mordred," she bid him goodnight and he nodded, turning away and walking down the hall to his room. He had moved his things into the second guest room. It was smaller but it still had its own bathroom and it even had a better view of the park which he liked more than the view of the city from Morgana's room.
Mordred closed his bedroom door and stared into the darkness. He let out a deep breath and then pulled his clothes off, tossing them over the chair in the corner and pulling on his pajama pants. He flicked on the lamp by the desk and looked around the room. It was a lot like the master bedroom, just smaller. There was a small entry way to the room that separated the bathroom from the bedroom. To the left was the bedroom where the first half was more of an office than a bedroom. The walls were lined with bookcases and a large desk sat against the wall. In the corner was a comfortable dark blue chair and footstool with a little coffee table. The floor was hardwood for the office half of the room but changed to a thick cream colored rug. The large queen canopy bed sat at an angle in the corner, the white sheer curtains were pulled back and tied to the posts. It was an inviting bed with a warm green duvet and white pillows. The room was decorated with various shades of green, cream and white and reminded Mordred of a forest. He wasn't sure why he didn't take this room from the beginning. In fact, he really didn't know why he took Morgana's room at all. He just hadn't even considered any other room. That thought disturbed him and he shook his head and climbed in between the blankets. He didn't think he'd manage to sleep at all but considering he hadn't slept more than two hours the night before and none before that, he was asleep in minutes.
o.O.o.O.o
"Can you believe Morgana?" Merlin asked as he lay next to Arthur, looking up at the ceiling while Arthur lay on his side, propped up on his elbow with his head in his hand.
"What do you mean?" He asked, lazily tracing the curves of Merlin's torso with his fingers.
"She's so different," He said, not sure if he should mention that he thought it wasn't a good difference but he wanted to know if Arthur had noticed the change too.
"She seems to have grown up a bit," He replied and Merlin laughed.
"Morgana grow up? Arthur I think Morgana has been 'grown up' since she could speak! No, she isn't more grown up she's... harder." He said hesitantly and Arthur met his eyes.
"Well her job is difficult and anyone would struggle dealing with the stress but she has it worse than most. Not only is she a woman working in a male dominant work environment but she's a Pendragon. My family has not made their wealth by making friends and we're known for being rather ruthless. Honestly, it isn't surprising that she has to shut herself down in order to survive." He explained and Merlin considered his words.
"Is it hard for you?" He asked, looking over at him.
"Yea," he nodded a sad look on his face, "it's incredibly hard to care. It's something I always struggled with. I always cared too much and it always gets me into trouble. For a long time I shut everything off, it was the only way I could do what was expected of me and live with myself." He said honestly, "but having you in my life has made it a lot easier. You don't let me shut down," he said with a gentle kiss to Merlin's lips.
"I'm glad. You have a big heart; I would hate to see you close that off." He sighed happily and closed his eyes; Arthur curled up beside him and rested his arm across his chest. He asked no more questions, they were both exhausted and in that moment, it didn't seem all that important anymore anyway.
o.O.o.O.o
Mordred was exceptionally agitated Merlin noticed the next day. He would let his face slip every now and then when he thought no one was looking and he would have such a dark scowl Merlin desperately wanted to know what was bothering him. Was it having Morgana back? Did something happen last night when she got home? Had she said something to bother him? Or was it not at all related to Morgana? He was dying to ask him but Mordred would not be alone with Merlin. It became apparent that he was actively avoiding Merlin part way through the day and he couldn't figure out why. Had Merlin said something? The tension was still there between them but he had hoped they would be able to move past it after all this time. Mordred still subtly flirted almost on a daily basis but that day, he wasn't even looking at Merlin. Finally after Mordred had completely ignored Merlin's talking to him, he had had enough.
"Mordred!" Merlin snapped but Mordred pretended to not hear him. He angrily chewed his tongue as he stood in the hallway watching Mordred walk away. This was getting ridiculous. He was his boss! He couldn't just ignore him like this, it was completely unprofessional! And it was also really starting to hurt Merlin's feelings.
Merlin stormed after him, looking down several hallways before locating him talking to Freya, a girl from finance just outside the supplies closet. He stood by the corner, waiting for them to finish talking. When Freya turned around and walked the other direction, Merlin trudged down the hallway towards Mordred.
"Mordred," he nearly shouted and grabbed his arm. He could hear someone coming down the hall but needed to talk to him now before he could get away again. Looking around, he quickly shoved Mordred into the closet and shut the door.
"Open that door Emyrs," Mordred hissed when Merlin faced him.
"No," Merlin spat and folded his arms across his chest, "why are you cross with me?" Mordred growled and ran his hands through his hair.
"Emyrs..." he seethed and Merlin had to resist the urge to slap him.
"What is your problem Mordred?!"
"You know what!" He shouted back and Merlin moved back at the rage in his words.
"Mordred," Merlin sighed, "come on, can't we be civil?"
"Open the door Merlin," he said. Merlin's name sounded strange coming from him, he never used it and Merlin could hear the bit of Romanian accent in the 'r'.
"Why?" He asked and Mordred closed the distance between them.
"Don't be a fool Merlin, we both know that Arthur is a better man than me." He said not really answering Merlin's question but saying what he really needed to say instead.
"How..." Merlin stammered and Mordred rolled his eyes.
"I'm not an idiot Emyrs; I've known Arthur was your boyfriend for months now."
"Did...did we do something?" He asked, desperate to know how many other people knew.
"No, don't worry; I don't think anyone else knows except Morgana. I only know because you look at Arthur the way I wish you'd look at me." Merlin gulped at his words.
"I'm sorry Mordred."
"Don't be," He smiled that strange smile of his; a smile so twisted with bitter sweet pain, "you deserve someone who's a lot better than me and Arthur is definitely a better man."
"Don't say that," Merlin frowned, Mordred was a good man too but he just quietly laughed and brushed a stray hair behind Merlin's ear.
"A good man wouldn't be trying to steal away someone else's man." He whispered and Merlin nodded, that was true.
"I'm not someone anyone can steal," he replied lamely and backed away from Mordred.
"No, you're not. You're a good person, pure and you would never do anything to hurt someone you love. But give me some kindness," he pleaded, stepping closer yet, "do not pretend that you do not know how I feel about you Emyrs."
"But I don't know!" Merlin growled as he glared at him, "I know that you're attracted to me, that you want me but that's all I know. Despite the fact that I feel like I can read your mind most days, I can't when it comes to me. You confused me Mordred; I don't know what you feel about me." He rambled and Mordred just stared at him, that same blank look as always.
"Merlin," He whispered and cupped his cheek with his hand, "I am in love with you. That is how I feel about you. I love you; I love all of you, every part of you. I love the way you clench your hair when you're frustrated; the way that you bite your lip when you're scared or nervous. I adore the way that your lips move when you read to yourself and the way that you always listen to everyone. I love the way that your pants always seem to barely be hanging onto your hips, the way that I can see your stomach when you wear your t-shirts. I love the way that you always see me and yet you never look away. You see who I am, you see all of me and yet you don't recoil, you don't turn away. I love the way you make me feel so warm. You are the fire while I am freezing to death and I love how big your heart is. I love how deeply you care for everyone, how loyal you are. I love you from head to toe, mind to soul." He said breathlessly.
AN: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! I'm so glad you're finding it suspenseful!