Warning: This right here is a Unicorn of death Fanfiction. For those of you who haven't read my other brilliantly amazing Fanfictions, that basically means that this thing will be filled with swearing, YAOI (dun dun duuun) and the occasional tasteless joke. Consider yourself warned.

Disclaimer: It's called Fanfiction because I am a FAN, not the owner of the damned characters.

An awkward moment or Roxas

So, you see, I had this problem.

I was absolutely dying of exhaustion, having pulled an all-nighter last night to watch Roxas from a tree. This would be okay – I was, after all, safe and warm in a bed, at night – but Roxas. Roxas Roxas Roxas. He was just lying there, making sexy little noises in his sleep and holding me tightly, occasionally kicking a little, and fuck I just wanted to do him, fuck...

So I couldn't really sleep.

I reached for my phone, which I'd left on the floor after getting changed into Roxas's pyjamas (FUCK YES I'M IN HIS CLOTHES I CAN SMELL HIM ALL OVER ME, MY BODY IS WHERE HIS NAKED BODY WAS, FUCKFUCKFUCK) and, dangling an arm painfully over the edge of his bed, already missing the feeling of having both arms around his tiny, soft, perfect body, grabbed it, wincing when it made what sounded like an insanely loud scraping noise on the floor. Turning away from the blonde bundle of perfection slightly, I turned it on and unlocked it, shielding it on one side so that the light didn't fall onto Roxas and wake him up. I saw one new message from Dem – that could wait, I wanted him to suffer – two from Olette, which I frowned at and decided to go for in a minute, only because they were probably about Roxas, and one from my mother.

My mother.

You can't even call her a fucking mother. You can call her a lot of things, not all of them negative, but you can't call her a mother.

Hello, Axel, it's me. Your mother. You haven't seen me in a while, huh? Listen, sweetheart, I know things were messy for a few years, and that's why I went away, to give you space to forgive me. Can you do that? I miss my little boy. I want to know all the regular mom things, like, do you have a girlfriend? How are you doing at school? How's your friend doing – the strange blonde one who looks a bit like David Bowie? Demyx? I think that's his name. Anyway, what I'm saying, Axel, is that I waited as long as I could for you to get in touch with me, but you never did, so now I'm sending you a message. You don't even have to reply if you're still mad at me; I understand totally if you are. But I want to be your mommy again, Axel. Please, forgive me. I love you. ~Mom xoxo

Fuck. Fuck her and her fucking manipulation and her, her everything. Why won't she just leave me alone? I had just shut down all the parts of my mind that remembered her, and worse, missed her, and now here she was, texting me from Destiny Islands – at least, I assume that she's still there, that's where she's been staying for the past five years – reopening the wounds just as I was preparing myself to confess to Roxas.

On the topic of Roxas, I should probably read those texts that his annoying girly friend sent me. Maybe she was telling me exactly how to turn him on, but probably not.

Axel? Are you with Roxas? Hayner says you've been stalking him... that's really not cool, if it's true... If you like him, fine, but that doesn't mean you can go around invading his privacy and all the shit that Hayner's accusing you of doing... if you hurt Roxas, or do anything he doesn't want you to do, me, Hayner and Pence are gonna be all over you, and you will never walk again, got it? -Olette

I scowled. Hayner. Fucking Hayner. How had he even found out that I was –

Actually, that might explain Demyx's eagerness to apologise to me earlier. That little whore, I was going to rip him apart with my bare hands. Why was he so intent on ruining things between Roxas and I? Did the thought of a stable relationship scare him, even if it wasn't him in that relationship? Was he jealous? Did he think that Roxas was going to take up all of my attention?

Maybe he was just an annoying, homewrecking whore whose only instinct was to ruin other people's relationships in any way he could.

The second text from Olette seemed a little less angry, but still not something I really wanted to read at nearly midnight when I should have been cuddling Roxas. Okay, thinking about it now, it makes sense. It makes a LOT of sense, actually. But I'm warning you now, you do anything creepy, you upset Roxas in any way, and you will be in a whole world of pain, got it? -Olette

I could probably take those three down with two punches, but actually, if I ever hurt Roxas, I would deserve every drop of pain that they could possibly inflict on me.

I gave into temptation and checked the text from Demyx last, my stomach twisting with anger to think that he had told his pissy little brother about me stalking Roxas and now Hayner knew and Olette and probably Pence knew and I was at risk of being castrated by a semi-rapist, a girl who still only looked about twelve and a guy who was a little too fond of ice cream, by the looks of him.

Axel, I'm really afraid. Luxord is on the warpath and Xigbar's not exactly happy either, I just had unprotected sex with Zexion and I'm scared I'm gonna catch something, I didn't even WANT to have sex with him, I think that Luxord is either gonna rape me or get killed by Xigbar, I'm so so scared, I don't even know where my clothes are, and my hair got messed up, and you were right, you were so so so right, I got in well over my head and I didn't know what to do and I'm scared, help me? Please?

I swore and looked at the time on that text. Forty-eight minutes ago. Okay, it could be worse. Somehow. I was going to have Zexion's ass in jail for rape, if anything actually happened with Luxord he was going to jail too, Xigbar was... well, I didn't know quite yet, but if he did anything stupid he was in shit too...

I sighed. I really needed to check on him, but in bed with Roxas... I shook my head. Why did he even get himself into that situation? I shuffled away from Rox, my Rox, delicately, taking a second to look as his gorgeous sleeping face, and then stood up, walking as far away as I could get so that I was a little less likely to wake him before hitting the "Call now" button on my phone.

"Demyx?" I hissed as soon as the ringing stopped. I was met with the classic, highly irritating "We're sorry, but the number you're trying to reach is –" Scowling, I stabbed the "End call" button and tried again. "Dem, you there?"

"It's me, Axel. Xigbar." That was not a good sign. My throat constricted, but I hadn't gathered up all of this rage and worry just to not talk now.

"Where's Demyx?" I growled. "I swear, if you pull any shit –"

"Don't panic, he's just sleeping. I'll wake him up and put him on the phone if you want." There was a pause. "Zexion and Luxord are both in the hospital, I may have beaten them up a little bit."

Instant brownie points from me. "Is Dem okay?"

"Yeah. Very upset, and very tired, and we couldn't find his shirt, but he'll be fine. Do you wanna talk to him? I can wake him up..."

"Yeah, that'd be great." There was a shuffling noise and, in the background, Xigbar talking in the gentlest voice I'd ever heard from the scarred old man, and then some mumbling from Demyx. "Dem?"

"Hey, Axel." He sounded more tired than anything. "Don't worry about me. Xigbar sorted it all out."

I swallowed. "Demyx, you really scared me there. I told you all along –"

"I know you did, Axel, I know. Thanks for trying, but I guess sometimes you have to learn the hard way." He coughed. "I might not be in school tomorrow or Friday, but I'll be okay. Don't worry about me, I'm fine."

"Okay, if you're sure..." I said dubiously. I didn't trust Xigbar – I barely trusted Demyx, to tell you the truth – but it didn't look like I could do much interfering, so I just left it. "Sleep well, okay, Demyx?"

"Yeah. Why're you whispering?"

"I'm at Roxas's house and he's asleep." Before Demyx could start talking to me about that, I dove in with, "Can you put Xigbar back on the phone? I wanna ask him about something."

"Sure." I could hear him muttering something along the lines of, "Xigbar, Axel wants to talk to – oh, thanks, I need that – Axel wants to ask you something."

"Axel? What's up?"

"What actually happened?" I asked, sounding a bit angrier than I'd meant to. It just sucked, to have seen something like this coming from miles and miles away and for it to finally happen even after warning him over and over again...

"Well, Luxord found out where we were..."

I sat down on Roxas's almost-dead sister's bed, wondering just when karma was coming to get me, and listened to the awful, awful tale of my best friend's evening.

Why doesn't he care that much about me?

I stirred and sat up, feeling the oddest sense of loss, like I'd misplaced a pillow or a blanket or –

Or an Axel. He was standing on Nami's side of the room, muttering into his phone, pacing up and down. Demyx, I would guess. He hadn't noticed that I was awake yet, and feeling drowsy and nauseous, I lay back down and watched him through half-closed eyes, seeing him cycle through agitated, angry, guilty and reassured, with the occasional bout of what looked a bit like pity. Eventually, though, he hung up. I looked at the clock – half past midnight. I closed my eyes completely and tried to stay asleep or at least look like I was asleep as Axel slid into the bed next to me, and almost instinctively I put my arms around him, nuzzling into his chest. He chuckled softly and slipped both arms around me, shifting me so that I was a little closer to him, his legs tangling up in mine.

"Roxas? You asleep?"

"Mm, a little," I said truthfully, breathing in the warm, masculine scent of Axel, trying not to smile too obviously. "Are you?"

"Nah, I've just been talking to Xigbar and Demyx."

"Are they a couple yet?" I asked, trying to fight back a yawn.

Axel started stroking my cheek and I tilted my head into his hand a little more, loving his strong, warm fingers on my skin... hey, um, I'm tired, leave me alone. "I'm not really sure. It seems like it, but neither of them said..."

"They should be, they like each other." I tried to relax my grip on Axel a little, so that if he wanted to, he could let go, but he just tightened his hold on me a little more, pulling me closer, his knee between my legs in what I'm sure was an entirely platonic, friendly, non-sexual cuddle-type thing. Really. This is what all friends do.

"Who else do you think should be a couple, Rox?" he asked quietly.

"Pence and Olette. Larxene and Naminé, um... you and..."

"Me and who, Roxas?" he asked. "Come on, I'm not gonna take the piss, you know that."

"It's just... it's stupid. Hayner was just saying earlier... he thinks you and I should go out. Weird, right?" I forced a laugh. "Who in their right mind would wanna go out with me? Especially someone like you, I mean you're –"

"Roxas." Axel cut me off with one sharp word and I fell silent, a little stung but relieved to have a reason to stop talking. "Who in their right mind wouldn't wanna go out with you?"

I muttered, "Well, you, clearly," assuming that Axel couldn't hear me, but something about the way he held me even tighter and pressed his lips very, very briefly to my forehead suggested that I'd been a little louder than I'd thought, or he was a better listener than I gave him credit for.

I realised that we were practically acting like a couple right now, but you know, he didn't have any feelings for me, I was almost certain of that. Because who would?

"So what were you talking to Demyx and Xigbar about?" I asked, hooking one of my ankles around one of his and nearly accidentally grinding against his leg. That probably wouldn't have been socially acceptable, would it? Did Axel even do socially acceptable? I'd been pretty taken aback by the way he'd talked to my mother. He was an absolute gentleman when he felt like it.

"Demyx got himself into some trouble with Luxord and Zexion, and sort of Xemnas as well. He's thinking about dropping out of school. You know he's been getting all his grades by, uh..."

"Yeah, I know," I said quietly. He wasn't exactly subtle about it. "Go on."

"Well, yeah, basically, he did what I'd spent months telling him not to do and got himself alone in an apartment with Xigbar, Zexion and Xemnas, which is never going to end well for him, and he couldn't really get help, but Xigbar could sort of see that he was getting upset and got really snappy with the other two, so Xemnas left but Zexion..." Axel took a deep, shaky breath that I felt in my chest as well as his. "He... uh..."

"It's okay. You're upset, right?" I could see him nodding in the weak moonlight filtering through the trees in my garden. "Take your time. I know how much it must suck; you really care about Demyx, so of course you're gonna be upset. Just take your time, it's okay."

He swallowed. "Zexion raped him."

I was silent, but when Axel didn't seem like he was going to talk again, I filled the silence with, "You could get him done for that, you know."

"Demyx has already said that he doesn't want to do that. Something about his pride and having to explain to his parents. He's really shaken up at the moment, so you know, doing stuff that he doesn't want us to do isn't going to help." I nodded in understanding. "Anyway. So that happened, and then because Xemnas had stomped off, Luxord got wind of where Dem was, and he showed up, apparently furious that he hadn't been invited along to the molestation-fest, and had Demyx up against a wall and everything, but Xigbar went for him, and... long story short, Zexion and Luxord are in hospital, Xigbar's nose is broken, and Demyx is really upset but I don't think there's any permanent damage there. Except, you know, he will probably never trust another Spanish teacher again."

I swallowed. "That's awful. You know, my mom works in law – if Demyx decides to press charges..."

"Nah, it's okay. You don't need to worry about it, anyway." In spite of the heat, Axel grabbed the blanket and tugged it up higher, to cover my shoulders, and looked at me. "You deserve one night of peace, at least. Go to sleep, and dream about bunnies and gay shit like that."

"You can hardly call anyone gay," I laughed, my eyes struggling to stay open and a small yawn escaping in what sounded more like a gasp. "Mind you, I can't either."

I realised something, in his arms, turned on and almost-asleep and smiling like a little kid.

I was so, so in love with him. It hurt. And the frustrating thing was, I'd been in love with him for a while now. I'd just been scared to admit it to myself, and now it was maybe too late to admit it to him.

Whatever he said, I still hadn't ruled out the possibility that he liked Demyx, even if Demyx and Xigbar were a thing, or almost a thing.

"Yeah, well. Are you being homophobic?" I laughed and so did he. He had the nicest laugh. "Look, Rox, get some sleep, yeah?"

How the hell am I meant to get any sleep in the arms of someone this gorgeous?

"Yeah, okay," I said thickly. Then, without warning, without my permission, "Love you."

There was a loaded silence and I pretended to be asleep, just so that he would think, you know, slip of the tongue because I was tired, and of course I didn't love him, that would be absurd.

"Love you too, Roxas," he whispered, and to this day I'm not even sure that it wasn't just a dream. "More than you will ever know."

Well, if it was real... that would be really nice, if it was real.

I woke up in the morning slightly confused, lying pretty much on top of Axel with my head tucked into his neck and something foreign digging into my leg. I could probably guess what it was, but I didn't really want to. I looked at the clock – six in the morning, almost acceptable waking-up time – and pulled myself into something like a sitting-up position, still on Axel's lap, thinking I could shower and maybe brush my teeth before he woke up and –

"Rox?" he said blearily, grabbing my elbow almost painfully. "You're... you're not leaving..."

It wasn't really a question, but I figured I'd try my luck anyway. "Axel, I need to run and have a shower, brush my teeth, you know –"

"No," he responded, pulling me back gently into his lap and wrapping his arms around me. "You're stayin'. And we're goin' back to sleep til... til seven."

"Axel, I normally get up at –"

"Don't care."

I took a deep breath and tried again. "My parents will probably think –"

"Don't care."

"Axel –"

"Just go back to sleep. We can worry about stuff when we wake up."

Lying on Axel, with his arms around me and his heartbeat drumming through his chest and onto my back, I couldn't really object to five or ten minutes in bed before I had my shower.

xxx

So, today's random fact about Unicorn of death: My stepdad isn't allowed to drive any more. The doctor doesn't think that he's safe to drive, or something. I dunno. It means that I'm gonna be walking more, so I'll hopefully lose some weight, and be getting buses more as well, which is better for the environment. My stepdad is gutted about it, though. He seems to be taking it as a personal insult.

Anyway, I wrote this oneshot called Bathrooms, and I was hoping y'all would go read it, because I'm still kinda debating whether to keep it as a oneshot or to turn it into a chaptered fic or just to write a series of related oneshots that can be read independently if one so wishes. Review and such, and thanks for all the support and love, it really does mean a lot to me.