A/N: Hey guys! Sorry I'm taking forever to update. Um...this chapter is going to get pretty weird to some of y'all. Someone in here is incredibly, INCREDIBLY ooc! You will know who it is when you get to it.
I know I'll probably get some flames about this, but I felt that I just HAD to try something new. I don't think it's been done yet, or much at all, so I felt that it wouldn't hurt to try it. lol Heh heh heh...enjoy...
Chapter 25
"It will be alright. It had to be done."
Those words rang continually in Kagome's head for those agonizingly slow days after Hiro's death. All she could do was listen to them as she lay on her bed, listless, not even feeling the tears that never stopped flowing for her friend.
Kouga had been nothing but the gentlest of men with her. He left her alone at times during the day because he needed to be at work, but at night he always slept right beside her and held her in his arms. Her silent weeping hadn't ceased, she barely slept, never spoke. She hadn't eaten in Kami knew how long and that worried him terribly. She hadn't even moved from this spot on her bed since he had laid her down on it. He knew it was guilt; a mind-numbing, soul-wrenching guilt that had forced her to retreat into herself like this. But why she should feel guilt was beyond him. She had done nothing wrong. It wasn't as if she had killed Hiro.
Even Inuyasha had been nothing but respectful to her. Later on that very first day, Inuyasha had gone back outside to collect his brother, thinking he would find the bastard sitting up wondering what the hell had happened. Unless of course, he was dead. But when he got there, he found a modernly dressed Naraku and Kanna standing over his brother's body. Kanna was, as expected, holding her soul-stealing mirror and attempting to draw in Sesshoumaru's soul.
Inuyasha was torn between letting them do it or stopping them from doing it. Finally he made his mind up. He shook his head and ran forward. "Oi, Naraku!" he shouted. "What the hell are you doing?"
Naraku looked up and over at him. He only tilted his head to the side and slid his hands into his trouser pockets. "Afternoon, Inuyasha. Long time no see, eh?" He shot his fellow hanyou a welcoming smile.
The silver haired hanyou only glared back at Naraku. "I said, what the hell are you doing?"
Laughing, Naraku replied, "As if you didn't know. It's pretty obvious, now isn't it? I want his frozen soul. Just getting him out of my way. Pity the miko didn't finish him off. She was pretty close, though. I've never seen so much hatred from her before. That's what drove her on." He smiled nastily. "She really fried his brain. Heh. Or whatever passes for a brain," he sneered. He looked away from Inuyasha and back down at Sesshoumaru. He frowned slightly. What was taking so long? The pale youkai's soul wasn't being drained from his body as fast as it should.
Inuyasha saw the look on Naraku's face, then down at Sesshoumaru...and he already knew the answer to the other hanyou's unspoken question. "Do you really think the Tensaiga would allow this to happen?"
"The Tensaiga?" Naraku was puzzled. He glanced from Inuyasha to Sesshoumaru and back again. "What about it? He's not wearing it."
"That's what's so fucked up. He doesn't have to anymore."
Right on cue, a high-pitched whistling sound came hurtling towards them. Naraku looked shocked and took a step back, wrenching his hands from his pockets. "Are you kidding me? He can summon the damned thing?" His red eyes scanned the skies above them.
A long silver object soon presented itself, piercing the ground next to Sesshoumaru's body. The second it touched the ground, the blade began to hum, turning a cool shade of blue. Naraku grabbed Kanna and staggered back just as the blue light enveloped the pale, still figure of Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha scowled and cracked his knuckles, readying himself just in case Sesshoumaru wanted to get down and dirty when he woke.
When the blue light disappeared, both hanyous waited with baited breath. Sesshoumaru would no doubt be pissed when he woke.
Golden eyes opened slowly. It looked as though he was trying to bring the world into focus. "What's... happened?" he murmured, his voice soft and slow.
Inuyasha frowned. Strange, that didn't sound like his brother. "Sesshoumaru?"
Groaning, Sesshoumaru winced and sat up. He put a trembling hand up to lightly touch his head. "Inuyasha? Is that you?" He looked up, his expression oddly child-like. "Inuyasha," he breathed. A small, relieved smile crossed his face. "You're here." He reached out to his little brother, who instinctively recoiled at the unfamiliar gesture. The taiyoukai frowned and withdrew his hand, shimmering tears welling up in his golden eyes. "You're afraid of me," he said sadly, lowering his gaze to the ground. "I don't want you to be afraid of me."
Naraku and Inuyasha exchanged shocked looks. 'What the hell is going on?' Naraku mouthed at Inuyasha, who only shrugged in response.
Kanna left Naraku's side and went to kneel beside the changed Sesshoumaru. He looked up at her with mournful eyes. Both hanyous stared at her as if she had lost her senses.
"Do not worry, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said in her usual breathy voice, "All will be well. Give your brother time to adjust to you. He is not used to seeing you this way." She got up and joined Naraku, who had already turned to go. She followed him without a word, leaving an astounded Inuyasha gaping after them.
Once they had gone, Inuyasha felt a small tug on his pant leg. He turned in time to see Sesshoumaru's lips curve up at the corners. "Brother," he whispered, gazing up at Inuyasha with appealing eyes.
Inuyasha finally began to realize that something traumatic had happened to his brother. He was no longer the same youkai he had been. Whatever Kagome had done to him had completely altered his mind.
Sighing, he held out a hand to his brother. A look of unbridled joy spread over his brother's face and Sesshoumaru took it gladly. He bounded to his feet and looked down at Inuyasha expectantly. "Where are we going?" he asked, grinning boyishly at the younger inu.
"Home," he said, shaking his head sadly. He gripped his brother's hand a little more tightly and led him back to the house. The older youkai followed obediantly after him, saying nothing. Instead, he only stared with adoration at Inuyasha's back, thinking how lucky he was to have such a brother as Inuyasha. When they had walked a several feet, Seshsoumaru frowned. "Inuyasha?"
"What?"
"My bottom hurts."
oooooooooooooooooooooooooo
A few days later, Kagome still didn't notice how much time had passed since she moved from her spot on the bed. She barely recalled the faces that floated before her blurred vision: Sango, who had checked up on her often while Kouga was gone; Miroku and Shippo who appeared sometime after her, then Inuyasha and after him, Kouga. Kouga would come into the room and not leave her until much later. But other than that, time moved unbearably slow to her. The hours flowed into each other, which left her unable to tell the difference between night and day, except for the light that managed to peek around the heavy curtains that Kouga kept closed. He didn't want her rest disturbed by bright sunlight.
It wasn't until three weeks later when the dam finally broke. Inuyasha brought the much-altered Sesshoumaru to Kouga's house. With Sesshoumaru in his current condition, it left him in charge of the taiyoukai's company. He entrusted his brother into Sango's and Miroku's care, and it was unanimously agreed that the older inu should be kept away from Kagome. Everyone feared that if she laid eyes on Sesshoumaru, memories would come flooding back and she may grievously injure herself as a result.
The day before the debacle, Sango and Kouga had gotten Kagome to bathe for the first time in a week and even eat a bit more than the two bites a day she usually managed to swallow. Everyone one in the household felt that this was a major breakthrough and hoped that she was well on her way to a full recovery. She still wasn't herself though, despite being able to keep her food down and sleeping for longer periods of time. They all knew what she had been through...what she had seen and felt. The sensation of having a close friend's life blood splatter all over your face; of having to feel their bones shatter beneath you... It was little wonder that when Kagome DID manage to sleep, for she would always wake up screaming Hiro's name. Kouga had to rock her back to sleep, while wiping away her tears and whispering loving words of encouragement.
On the day of the row, Kagome had been sitting listlessly in an armchair by one of the windows. It was open, allowing the cool, breezy air into the room. She was dressed in a white, filmy linen gown. Her hair flowed loosely about her slim shoulders. Once-lively chocolate brown eyes were now distant and flat in her pale face.
Kouga, who was standing in the doorway of the bedroom they shared, frowned. He had been watching her for the past few minutes. He had even called her name a couple of times, but she only sat in that chair, staring unblinkingly out of the window. If it wasn't for his youkai eyes and ears, he would think she was dead, so light was her breathing. Her chest barely moved.
Lately, when he kissed her, his heart broke every time he did so. She never kissed him back and never displayed any kind of emotion. To him, it felt as though he was kissing a porcelain doll, with its smooth cold skin and glassy-eyed stare. But his love never faltered, never waned. She was his mate and he would take care of her, no matter how long it took for her mind to recover.
Saddened, he finally left, whispering that he loved her. The second the door closed, another barrage of tears slid silently down her face unheeded.
A gentle breeze blew in, lifting one silken black lock of hair. The breeze departed and the strand of hair fluttered back down in its original resting place on her breast. She did not hear the bedroom door open, nor did she hear the soft footsteps that made their way to her chair.
A tall figure knelt down beside her and sniffed the air. "Hi there, pretty lady. Why are you crying?"
The living doll blinked, but said nothing. She only continued to stare out of the window.
The beautiful face beside her frowned. "I could smell your tears all the way from my room. It's down the hall. That way." He pointed one purple-striped clawed hand in the direction of his room.
Still, there was no response. Sesshoumaru was puzzled. The pretty woman did not seem to hear him at all. He did not like to see her cry, so he sat down on the floor beside her and watched her with concern.
"My brother says I shouldn't be in here," he went on in a hushed voice. His worried golden eyes remained on her still, white face. "He says that you are ill and need to be alone for awhile." He bowed his silver head and looked down into his lap. His long, elegant fingers plucked aimlessly at the fabric of his trousers.
After a long, silent moment, he looked back up at her. She had not moved at all. "I don't think you should be alone right now. You're sad. You need to be with people who love you. Being alone is bad. I hate it. I was alone for a very, very long time, but I don't remember why." He turned his head away for a second and when he looked back at her, he jumped.
Her head had turned, her soft brown eyes locked on his. Sesshoumaru smiled. He was so happy. "Hi!" he chirped sunnily. He got back on his knees and moved closer to her, his waist coming into contact with the armrest.
Now that he looked down at her, he could see her better. His heart began to beat faster. She was SO beautiful! Gazing down at her, his eyes glowed. "You look like an angel," he whispered, his voice filled with awe.
Once again she did not answer. She only sat in her chair and watched him. A slight frown creased her brow.
Sesshoumaru's face clouded. Could she not talk? He didn't understand.
As he puzzled over this, sounds of voices could be heard from the first floor. Uh oh! Inuyasha was talking with Uncle Kouga near the bottom of the staircase. Hurriedly, he got to his feet. "I have to leave now," he muttered apologetically. "If Inuyasha catches me in here, I'm in in big trouble." He lowered his head and tugged shyly at his shirt. "I hope they let me see you sometime," he whispered, his face turning bright red. "Y-you are so p-pretty." He turned away quickly and began to move away when he heard a soft, musical voice speak behind him.
"What is your name?" the voice asked.
Sesshoumaru stopped in his tracks. He looked back over his shoulder and saw that the black-haired angel had gotten to her feet. She was standing rather unsteadily beside her chair while she stared at him.
He rushed back to her and was fixing to hug her when he thought better of it and stopped himself before he could. Inuyasha had taught him it was not okay to hug everybody, only friends and family. He said most strangers don't like being hugged. Since Sesshoumaru had only met this woman today, she was considered a stranger.
He bowed his head shamefully. "I'm sorry I tried to hug you. Inuyasha says I mustn't hug strangers."
The girl frowned at him and he took a step back. Was she angry at him? What had he done wrong?
"Inu...yasha?" she whispered.
Sesshoumaru nodded. "Yes. He's my brother," he said proudly.
The girl shook her head. "No, that's not right. Inuyasha only has one brother." She eyed him up and down dispassionately.
"I know," he replied with a cheerful grin. "That's me. Sesshoumaru."
There was a long, tense silence during which Sesshoumar was beginning to feel really uncomfortable. The way she stared at him without blinking bothered him. His smiled faltered and vanished when her entire body began to shake.
Worried, he put out a hand to her. "Hey! Are you okay?" he asked gently, but jerked his hand back when her eyes changed to an ugly red color and sharp teeth slid out from behind her lips. A hideous growl erupted from her throat.
A terrified whimper escaped him as he turned to run away but he fell, tripping over his own feet. He cried out for Inuyasha as he crawled away from that once-beautiful creature who was now snarling at him.
There was a pounding of feet on the staircase and in the hallway, but that was instantly forgotten as he felt a sharp, stinging sensation across his back. The next moment, he found himself flat on his back, staring up into her hate-filled eyes.
Both of her hands made their way up to his neck and wrapped themselves around them until he could breathe. He began to cry then. Never had he been so scared in his life. All he knew was that he wanted Inuyasha to save him and tell him everything would be alright.
"You KILLED him!" she shrieked at him. MURDERER!"
Sesshoumaru felt strange, as if he would black out any moment. There was a loud crash and shouting voices and then... the strangling hands were gone. A pair of strong arms lifted him up and held him against a familiar chest.
"Hey there, big guy. It's okay now...it's okay now. Are you alright?" It was Inuyasha.
Still horribly shaken but relieved, Sesshoumaru turned his face against his brother's body and cried some more. The girl's screams hadn't ended and the sound of a scuffle ensued. But soon, the shrieks subsided into heart-wrenching sobs.
ooooooooooooooooooooo
Kouga had never seen Kagome like this before. The way she looked as she was throttling the life out of Sesshoumaru... well, suffice it to say that he had NEVER seen her that way before. He had rushed at her, effectively removing her from the helpless Sesshoumaru and holding her tightly in his arms. He had had a hell of a time keeping his grip on her. The girl fought like a wildcat to get to Sesshoumaru. In the struggle, she'd actually managed to get a hand loose and rip up one of his sleeves, along with the flesh of the arm inside it.
Soon, the snarls and shrieks ended,and the wracking sobs began. Her body went limp in his arms and gingerly released her from the hold he had on her. Instead of dropping to the floor or moving away, she whirled around in his arms and clung to him. He held her tightly against him. Her grief was so intense, that it caused him to tear up.
She gasped against his neck and fell silent, sliding down his body. Kouga scooped her unconscious figure into his arms and went to lay her down in their bed and pulled the comforter up to her chin. That seen to, Kouga went over to where Sesshoumaru and Inuyash were on the floor.
"How is he doing?" Kouga asked quietly, dropping down on one knee beside Sesshoumaru.
Inuyasha, who was now rocking his brother gently and stroking his hair, looked up. "He's quiet now. But she sure scared the hell out of him." To Sesshoumaru he said, "That's why I told you not to come in here, big guy. Do you understand now?"
Sesshoumaru nodded solemnly against his brother's chest. "I understand Inuyasha. I'm sorry I disobeyed you."
Inuyasha shook his head with a rueful smile and placed a kiss on his brother's head. "It's okay, big guy. Just don't do it anymore, okay? We don't want you to get hurt."
Another nod. Then he said quietly, "Why did she call me a murderer, Inuyasha?"
Both Inuyasha and Kouga tensed up and exhanged nervous glances.
'What do I tell him?' Inuyasha mouthed at Kouga.
'Nothing,' Kouga mouthed back. Aloud he said, "Hey, Sesshoumaru? You wanna go with Inuyasha to get some pizza? Or how about some ice cream? Would you like that?"
At once, Sesshoumaru sat up and gazed hopefully at his brother. "Oh, can we, Inuyasha? Please?"
Inuyasha sent a grateful look over at Kouga. "Of course we can, big guy. Let's go and get ready, okay?" He got to his feet and held his hand down to his brother.
Sesshoumaru shot upwards and ran out of the room, yelling, "Pizza and ice cream! Pizza and ice cream!"
Once he had gone, Inuyasha's body sagged with relief. "Damn, that was close."
Kouga led the way out of the room and shut the door softly behind them. "Yeah, no shit."
"I thought I was going to have a heart attack when he asked me that question." Inuyasha sighed. "I just didn't have the heart to tell him the truth."
"You don't have to tell him anything right now, Inuyasha. I guess it's a good thing he has such a short attention span." Kouga shook his head. "I'm still not used to the fact that Sesshoumaru is brain-damaged. I'd never have thought it was possible for something like that to happen to someone like him."
They began walking down the hallway towards Sesshoumaru's room. They knew he was in there, but he was being very quiet.
"And I'M not used to the fact that he's completely helpless. You'd never think that a youkai like that... Right?"
"Not to mention that he now looks up to you. He's never done THAT before." Kouga cast a glance over at the hanyou.
"No kidding. This, coming from a guy who hated me so much that he tried killing me more times than I could ---"
Sesshoumaru stepped out into the hallway, tennis shoes in hand. His gold eyes were huge in his face, as though he'd just heard something startling. His bottom lip trembled and tears spilled down his cheeks.
Inuyasha dashed forward. "Sesshoumaru? Are you okay?" he asked worriedly.
"Brother, what does 'brain-damaged' mean?"
Time seemed to stop for Inuyasha. His eyes closed for a moment. How could he have forgotten? Just because his big brother's mind was no longer the same, it didn't mean his senses of sight, smell and sound would be in any way diminished. "Sesshoumaru," he started to explain, but was interrupted by a cold, tightly controlled voice.
"It means you are one dumb shit."
Kouga and Inuyasha whirled around and Inuyasha could practically feel his brother's heart breaking. "Kagome! Don't do this!" the wolf cried, running down the hall towards her.
"Why the HELL not?" she demanded loudly. "He killed Hiro! He KNOWS he did it! This... this pathetic farce has gone far enough!"
Kouga tried to put his arms around her to calm her down, but she would have none of it. Instead, she dodged him and stormed down the hallway with Kouga right on her heels.
Inuyasha pulled Sesshoumaru behind him. "Come on, Kagome, leave him alone. It's over and done with, okay? Just... just leave him alone."
Kagome's face froze. "You're...defending him!" she gasped. She just could not believe it. Her gaze went beyond Inuyasha to the trembling Sesshoumaru, who was cowering behind him. "You know you did it," she hissed at him accusingly. "What? Are you pretending that you forgot?" Balling up her fists, she let the power of the jewel flow through her and down into her hands until they glowed a fiery red.
The once proud and haughty Sesshoumaru began to wail and fell in a heap to the floor, his hands clutching at his brother's legs. He called out for Inuyasha, who immediately dropped down beside him and began to comfort him. "Kouga, damn it, get her out of here!" he commanded over his brother's cries.
Kouga grabbed her by the waist and pulled her close to him. "Sweetheart," he began quietly, "Sesshoumaru doesn't remember. The only thing he knows is Inuyasha is his brother."
She moved stiffly away from him. "Oh, I get it. He's allowed to forget what happened, but not me, is that it? I get to remember every little thing that happened, right? Every little thing that HE caused to happen." She pointed a flaming red finger at Sesshoumaru.
Kouga winced, but she went feverishly on. "That's NOT right, Kouga and you know it! HE'S the one who killed Hiro! HE'S the one who knocked us out of the sky! HE'S the one--!" Her eyesshone with delirium and the fury of the Shikon.
He couldn't allow her to hurt Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai was now as helpless as a newborn infant and despite his past transgressions, it would be wrong to take advantage of such a great weakness. Kouga felt his heart break at what he knew he must do. But he knew that reasoning with her right now was impossible.
A resounding slap echoed in the hallway. Stunned, Kagome stared up at Kouga with a horrified expression, the light of the jewel fading. Her pale cheek bore the red mark of a large handprint. She lifted a hand and gingerly touched the side of her face. "Kouga...?" she whispered, hurt evident and disbelief shining in her large brown eyes.
"I...I'm sorry," he whispered, lowering his hand to his side. But when he reached out to her, she turned and ran back the way she had come, only this time, she went into her own bedroom. The door slammed shut behind her and all three youaki could hear the lock sliding into place.
"Damn it to hell," muttered Kouga. He turned away and put his hands on his hips, thoroughly disgusted with himself. "She'll never forgive me now."
"There was nothing else to do. You didn't need her getting hysterical on you." By now, Inuyasha had managed to calm down his brother, who was whimpering softly. "Besides, she only would have upset this one even more." He indicated his brother with a nod.
Kouga shot a look at the brothers before heading over to Kagome's door. Painfully aware that this house was HIS house, he timidly knocked on the door of her bedroom. "Sweetheart? Please let me in. I'm so sorry I struck you, Kagome. Please... baby, let me in. Okay? Kagome?" His keen ears picked up her sobs, which sounded as if she were muffling them against a pillow or thick blanket.
"Please, Kouga...please...go away."
When he heard those words, he scowled. The last time she had wanted to be left alone, she had been kidnapped right out of this very room. His eyes shifted over to Sesshoumaru. It had been HIS fault at that time, too. Damn it all.
His temper flared. "Like hell I will!" he announced loudly to the door. "I demand to see you right this second, so open this damned door and let me in!"
While helping Sesshoumaru onto his feet, Inuyasha heard Kouga's demands. "Oh, yeah," he scoffed, "THAT'LL get her to come out of her room. Good job, yaseokami."
Kouga sent a withering glance his way. "Fuck off, Inu-koro," he growled.
Inuyasha only laughed as he led his sniffling brother downstairs, leaving Kouga to glare at Kagome's bedroom door. Kouga bitterly fought back the urge to beat the door down and storm in anyway. Instead, he took a deep breath and swallowed his frustration. "Kagome?" he asked again, gently this time.
"Iie."
He sighed heavily. "Please?"
"IIE!"
"You won't outstubborn ME, Kagome!" he shot back angrily. "I'm the KING of stubborn!"
"I don't care," came her reply.
With a grunt, Kouga sat down against the wall right beside her door. "Well, I do," he remarked softly, but just loud enough for her to hear.
"So?"
Kouga growled deep in his chest. "Don't push me, woman!" he snapped.
An answering growl came from inside the room. "Why not? YOU freaking slapped me!"
"Agh! That's only because you were getting hysterical, Kagome!" he cried irritably.
The lock on her door shot back and the door was flung open. Kouga jumped to his feet and whirled around to face her. She stood in the doorway. Her eyes were red from crying; her nose, puffy.
"Why shouldn't I be hysterical!" she screamed at him. "That...that BASTARD murdered my friend and then tried to murder me and YET, I see you and Inuyasha defending him!" She stormed out of the room and stood toe-to-toe with him, her face tilted up to his. "What the FUCK am I supposed to think, Kouga?" she hissed at him. "Huh? Please...tell me what I was supposed to think!"
Kouga studied her face. She was so full of rage and hatred that it nearly made him want to take a few steps back. Instead, he reached up and tenderly caressed her face. "Sweetheart, you've had your revenge on Sesshoumaru. He's no longer what he was before, as you saw just now. Instead of killing him, you purified his brain, which has turned him into someone that he would have once loathed and despised. He's kind and gentle now, but utterly helpless. He needs people to look after him, to take care of him."
Kagome opened her mouth to speak, but he silenced her with a swift kiss. "I know it looks strange to you, my love. It was very stange to us when Inuyasha brought him here after...after...that. We didn't believe him at first, that he was really altered, but one morning, Inuyasha woke up and found Sesshoumaru huddled next to him. Later, Seshoumaru told us that he had become frightened when he woke up and found himself alone in a strange place. He tracked Inuyasha down to his room and fell asleep beside him."
"Sesshoumaru would never do that," she muttered. "He hates Inuyasha with a passion."
The wolf nodded. "Exactly. All the more reason to believe that he really HAS changed. The old Sesshoumaru NEVER would have behaved like that with anyone, much less with Inuyasha."
Glaring at Kouga, she shrugged. "I really could care LESS about Sesshoumaru having a five year old's brain. It was HIS fault to begin with and I don't feel the least bit sorry for him." Looking away, she bowed her head. "Hiro is still dead."
"Kagome--" began Kouga, but Kagome had already fled back into her room and locked the door. Once again, he was left to stare at her door.
oooooooooooooooooooooo
The next day, she was still locked in her room. Kouga could smell her tears through the door when he tried coaxing her out of the room. After a futile half and hour, he gave up and went downstairs to his study.
Sitting in the dark with a double whiskey, Kouga shut his eyes and leaned back in his chair. He wondered how long this would go on. Not that he was having second thoughts about mating her, no. He loved her more than life itself and was more than willing to wait forever for her. But this hatred for Sesshoumaru was so unlike her. Even though she'd seen how he'd turned out, she still hated him and wanted him dead.
He really hoped that Kagome would finally come around. The inu was no longer a threat to anyone.
A soft knock came on his study door. Groaning, he opened his eyes. "What?" he called out testily.
The door opened and a tall, robed figure stood in the doorway. It had long, pale hair past the waist and Kouga immediately stifled the curse behind his lips. "Yes, Sesshoumaru? What is it?"
The figure slipped into the room and shut the door behind him. "Are you confusing ME with that pathetic man-child, Kouga?"