*I do not own the rights to the characters, the rights to the characters belongs to E.L James*

AN: Hello all! I know that it has taken me a while to post, but I have been using my cellphone to write my story for this chapter and it has been a little bit of a challenge. In addition to that, the writers block has been real. I hope this chapter was ok because I am not sure how I really felt about it.

Also, in addition to that (I know that this is kind of random) I have been Nanning for a two year old… it has probably been one of the hardest things that I have had to do. For any of you that are parents or watch child… I have to give it to you for how hard you must work.

Please remember to review my story, pm me for questions and the Pinterest board is named after the story. Please do review and I will try to get this next chapter up to you ASAP! I am sorry if there are many erros, the autocorrect on my phone is crazy.

Xoxo,

Alysha

Chapter 25: I know Someone

He has sat here, staring at me silently for quite a while now.

Why can't he just tell me?

All that I know is that what whatever is going on here is the epitome of complicated. But I thought that even though it was complicated, that he could at least trust me. I thought that amongst all of this confusion that we would at least be friends first. I know we are still trying to get to know one another, but we've let each other in before. I don't know why this time is so different.

"Tell me Christian." I ask while attempting to push him further.

We are both locked in a very intense gaze with one another, waiting to see if he actually going to make the step. I am about to interject and offer more encouragement, when he removes his gaze away from mine and puts his head in his hands while running his beautifully sculpted fingers through his hair and finally says "fuck" in a very hushed tone. If I weren't paying his much attention I probably wouldn't have heard it.

"Ana I consider myself to be a very confident man... I was able to achieve so much in such a short time because of my communications skills. I can capture everyone's attention just by me walking in the room. At the snap of my fingertips things get done, without ever having to ask twice. I am not trying to be an asshole by telling you this Anastasia, I just need you to understand that I am completely out of my element here. I have never had to explain myself to anyone before. If I tell you about my past I need you to promise me that you won't leave until I am finished."

"I am not going anywhere Christian." Why does he always think that my first instinct is to run... I don't know what this is or is happening between the two of us but I won't be going anywhere until I at least find out what this is.

"You say that now but you haven't heard everything yet."

"Then tell me."

At first I thought that we were really starting to get somewhere with this conversation, but what he does next surprises me. He rises to his feet, standing before me in all of him that is Christian Grey and asks me to dance.

Has he lost his mind?!

We are trying to conduct a very important conversation and all he wants to do is dance?! We need to be talking this out not prancing around here like everything is fine. It seems that the flabbergasted facial expression must give him an idea of what I am actually thinking. I have tried to be calm and collected about this, but we are getting nowhere! I am really about to give him a piece of my mind when he ends up beating me to the punch saying,

"I know you want to talk, and we will but I just need to feel you right now." He says while offering his hand to me. I let out a frustrated sigh because I am slightly torn. On the one hand I want to be stubborn and demand that he just tell me what I want to know without the potential distractions. On the other hand I want I comfort him and make him feel at ease. In making my decision, the look on his face tells me exactly what to do.

I shake my head and sigh before placing my hand in his, standing up and saying "But there is no music Christian."

He places both of his hands on my lower back, lying dangerously close to the top of my ass and pulls me closer to him. The part of me that really wants him is all too tempted to run her hands over every inch of his delectable body, but the look of fear that is plastered all over his face the moment he moves me closer to him makes me think otherwise. I look into his eyes deeply, silently trying to reassure him to trust me. I lift up my left hand and move it to rest behind his neck; clearly trying to display my intentions. When he sees where my hand is headed he slightly begin to relax. I take my other hand and rest it in the middle of his arm.

Christian starts to move us into a steady motion. Although it seems effortless for Christian, I am desperately trying to keep up with his movements.

Front,side, back... Front, side, back

We've been moving together in a steady groove for a while now. This is exactly why I didn't want do this. I knew that he would use this as a way to distract me from this very important conversation. Goddamn him and his beautiful ways. He knows exactly how to get me. I really want to say something because there is no way that we can get around this; but I don't want to push him, he needs to do this on his own. We are continuing to glide around the exhibit. He still hasn't said a thing and I really think that this was all a joke to him when he surprises me by actually talking

"I was a very troubled child." he states

"My life before I was adopted by Grace and Carrick was horrid. My mother was a crack whore and constantly struggled to make ends meet. To say the least, the effects of her abandonment has shaped me in ways that I guess until now I never even realized." He says while pulling me closer to him, settling my head on his chest. As soon as my head makes contact with his iron chest, he immediately starts to tense.

His reaction to me causes me to lose count and step right on his foot. Shit!

My face snaps up to his to see how much damage I've done. I know that must have hurt.

"Oh my God, in so sorry Christian are you ok."

"Yes." He says while trying to maintain a steady tone of voice and regaining our steady pace across the exhibit.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean for that to happen! Please continue."

He sets his head against my hair and inhales sharply in my hair and relaxes his hold around me.

I lift my head up to look up at him. When I meet his eyes I am greeted by a very vulnerable looking Christian. This is. Very strange experience for me. I've never seen him look anything but the powerful Christian Grey that everyone thinks they know.

"What does this have to do with the gala Christian?"

"Well due to my previous upbringing before Carrick and Grace, I was a very rebellious teenager. I was throwing shit, breaking shit, breaking people, getting expelled… if it was bad I probably did it. Seeing how much I fucked up, my mom didn't know what to do with me anymore. She and Carrick had half a mind to just ship my ass off to military school… but they didn't. They settled instead for sending me to work with a close friend of theirs. I would go to her house every day after school and then do yard work for her. At first it was all fine until one day I was doing work in her backyard and she came up to me asking me if wanted something to drink. I don't even remember what it was that I said, but I replied with something slick and she slapped me. I was completely stunned and out of my element, what shocked me even more was that after she slapped me, she kissed me."

"What?!" I say out loud! She kissed him? What does he mean that she kissed him?!

"Ana-" I have once again I have managed to lose my focus and trample all over his feet.

"Jesus... I am so sorry Christian I didn't mean to step on your feet again.

"It's ok Anastasia… let me explain everything though."

"Ok." I agree before attempting to regain our previous movements along the floor.

"When she kissed me it was really strange for me. I was partially pissed off me because she hit me; but at the same time I was so turned on because she kissed me. I was even surprised that a woman wanted to be with me in that way. Everyone that I know was afraid of me, and here comes someone that wanted to be anywhere near me. over time we established a… relationship of sorts for around six years and since she has been a close friend and a mentor. She was able to set me straight, keep me in line and teach me how to be the man that I am today… everything I am is all owed to her. She is someone that I can trust and that helps me make all of my decisions… while we were at the gala she called me… she's been concerned about me lately. She has been worried that I have been off my focus and that my relationship with others may be affecting my ability to keep control."

"Is that what that bitch did to you Christian!" I scream while stopping all movements across the floor. I am absolutely livid!

"Ana." he says in a quiet voice

"What did she do to you? What kind of 'relationship' was it that you had with her… because right now it sounds like you are saying that she had sex with you as a minor?"

"Ana… it's not that simple… she really helped me Ana… She told me something and I needed to consider what she was saying when I was acting. She's always been right, she's never steered me in the wrong direction. Normally I can understand and do everything perfectly and in any way that I want to, but with you I am out of my comfort zone… I have no idea how to do this."

I am standing in front of him trying to figure out how to handle this situation… her influence on him is even stronger than I thought that it was. She raped him… she raped him and he doesn't even see it and what's worse is that he defending her! He is fucking defending her! He is defending his rapist! Never in a million years did I ever think that I could ever defend the person that molested me… I could never defend husband number three.

"Christian… I don't know how to tell you this, but she did everything but help you Christian, she crippled you."

He backs away from me instantly and starts to move around and tugging at his hair. "Ana… I know that
Elena was rude to you, but you don't know her. You don't know her like I do. I need her help."

"I might not know her as Elena, but I know someone else like her who did the same thing…" I whisper while looking down at the fingers that are twirling around near my lap. Calm down… you are fine… he's your friend… you were going to tell him eventually.

"What do you mean you know someone like her Ana…"

"I was fourteen… and he… her husband he…"

"You were fourteen and what…?" he asked while looking at me confused

"He molested me." I whisper.