A/N: The version of the chapter title song by Pieta Brown is recommended

Dirt Road Blues

Now that he could walk again Matthew did not want to sit down. At first he had to use two canes but he quickly was able to discard one. The initial problem was balance, not atrophied leg muscles. That infernal rackicycle had kept his muscles in good shape, all things considered. He had to learn how to stand erect again. But it came back to him, like riding a bicycle would he suggested to Mary but she wouldn't let him get out his old two wheeler just yet.

Dr. Clarkson told him walking was the best exercise and so Matthew walked everywhere all the time. Each day he went on an early morning walk before Mary got up. After breakfast they walked the grounds around the Abbey. Three afternoons a week Mary exercised Diamond after lunch while Matthew walked with Robert. Three afternoons a week Matthew and Mary walked, some times to the village, but mostly touring the far reaches of the Estate. Matthew took to carrying a notebook and they would write down things they saw on the estate, bad things which had to be corrected, good things which might be duplicated elsewhere. They learned the names of all the tenants and workers, their families and even their dogs and what their concerns were. It made Mary happy and proud, whether he knew it or not, Matthew was learning to be the lord and master of their, not his or hers, but their Downton Abbey. They walked rain or shine, or at least Matthew did, Mary sometimes begged off if the weather was too inclement, but Matthew forged on dressed in his tweeds, mac and wellies. Isis often accompanied them, especially those days they packed a light picnic lunch for their tea. Sundays they all walked to church.

On a beautiful day, almost a month to the day that Matthew had regained the use of his legs, and she smiled to herself, other parts of his body, she felt that he was strong enough, and perhaps more importantly, she was strong enough to confront him about his actions on that day. She had Mrs. Patmore pack her a light picnic lunch as they might be some time. She chose their special bench, it was far enough away from the house so that if their voices were raised, and she felt certain they would be, no one would hear. And it had so many special memories for them that he would feel safe there and not be compelled to flee when she started berating him.

When the two of them, and Isis who had tagged along, got to the bench Mary sat down. She patted the bench beside her. "Come sit down"

Matthew smiled at her "You can't be tired already"

"Sit!" Mary was not smiling. Matthew sat down. Isis did too.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"We have to talk about what happened the day of the hunt; or should I say what didn't happen then"

Matthew grabbed her hand "I'm sorry, it's just that I thought..."

Mary pulled her hand back. "Your problem is that you think too much, you never listen and you never talk things over. You do what you think is right never conceding that you might be wrong. That has to end and it ends today."

"But I..."

"Shut up and listen! I love you. You love me. We are married. We are one not two. We decide things together. You will never, ever decide anything for us again. We will decide together. Do you understand?" She glared at him.

"I was doing it for you." When she started to say something he continued "I listened to you so let me talk as well. As things were before I could not meet all your needs..."

"Needs?" she sneered. "For what? Lust? Do you think I'm some sort of slut and that's all I live for?" She poked him in the chest. "You satisfy all the lust I have; then, now and you will until we are so old and grey we forget why we are lying in bed naked together."

"But I could never give you..."

"Children? Do you see our children frolicking about? Since you recovered we've been going at it like profligate rabbits. Like we did during every leave you had. And what do we have to show for it? Nothing. In the same time Edith has had two children with another one on the way. Let's face it I'm barren. No matter what noble sacrifice you thought you were making I'm never going to have any children." She could feel the tears coming but she held them back.

"But you had..."

"I think the illness ..."

Matthew pulled Mary into a hug. "It's likely me, I'm probably shooting blanks." He pulled back and kissed her. "I propose that when we next go to London, we see the appropriate Harley Street specialists and get our respective plumbing checked out. If they find something which can fixed we will get it fixed. If there's nothing to be done, well we will spoil our nieces and nephews and work on breaking the entail. All in favour?" Mary nodded "Good, carried unanimously. Now one last thing I want to deal with before we seal it away with other things we never will talk about again. I was wrong to be doing what I was going to do. I am so sorry I hurt you. The blackness is gone, it will not return. We may have troubles in the future but that won't be one of them. I will never you leave that way. I love you so." And he hugged her tight. They were both crying at this point.

Later, after their tears had dried and they had spent a good deal of time with Mary tucked up underneath Matthew's arm, sitting on the bench contemplating the prospects of their future, Isis had had enough. She made it clear to them that it was time to eat. Neither of them were all that hungry so Isis enjoyed the lunch as their proxy.

"There's one more thing I'd like to do in London"

"Just one?" Mary asked as she traced small circles on the inside of his thigh.

"Quit that unless you want...say did we ever do it in the gazebo?"

"As I recall the stone is rather cold on bare flesh...what was this other thing you wanted to do?"

"Purchase a gramophone"

"A gramophone?"

"It's a machine that plays recorded..."

"I know what a gramophone is. Have you developed a sudden urge to have the music of the great masters fill the Abbey?"

"That too but I was thinking of dance music"

"Dance music?"

"Yes, dancing is good exercise for the legs. But that's not the main reason. According to my calculations I have not danced with my wife nearly enough. I intend to catch up."

"That is a worthy goal"

Isis looked at the two of them snogging. So much for today's walk. She sighed, but being a practical dog, she soon found a nice patch of sun on the grass and laid down for a snooze.