OK, another epilogue! So, there is a "frame" around this story, but otherwise, it is a bunch of flashbacks to all different times, and not necessarily in order. I was just kind of experimenting with a non-straightforward method of storytelling for my own enjoyment. And now you have to pay the price. I hope it doesn't cause nosebleeds! I promise, the next epilogue will be more straightforward.

Thanks to eyeon who gave me the idea a very, very long time ago it seems, to get Jin and Sun back into the story. And, well . . . to everyone who suggested baby names. Now I have to apologize because I sure can't remember who suggested the one I finally went with.

And thanks to everyone who keeps reading. And reading. And reading. I appreciate your patience!

April 23, 2007

James sat back. He wanted to take a mental snapshot of this night. It was the first time just the four of them had been together since . . . well, since sometime in July 1977, as odd as that was (and he was long since past shaking his head at the oddness of his life).

Way back when, it had been a completely unremarkable evening. He'd come home from a late shift to find Juliet and Jin sitting at the dining room table. She'd recently decided to go beyond dirty Korean jokes and actually learn the language, and they were having lessons. Their heads were bent in concentration over a piece of paper. He bent to give Juliet a kiss, and she said something unintelligible in Korean. It made Jin laugh with his hand over his mouth. As James headed to the kitchen, he wondered if Jin had been laughing at Juliet's incompetence or if she'd actually managed to say something witty in Korean. He put together a sandwich for a late dinner. Not five minutes later, Miles came barging in from his house next door, bitching out Jin for eating the last of . . .something. It had been thirty years ago. How was James supposed to remember what it had been?

"Trying to learn something, here," Juliet interrupted Miles' and Jin's little Odd Couple spat. Sawyer gestured Miles back to the kitchen and fixed a sandwich for him. The two men ate their sandwiches in companionable silence. From time to time they could hear Jin's patient, "No. Not like that," and he'd sound out some word. And that was it. Nothing to it. Just another night in Dharmaville. Jack and the gang had shown up four days later.

Now here they were again, on a warm, late April Miami night, sitting on the back deck of the house he and Juliet moved into a year and a half ago. Celebrating Miles' 30th birthday. They'd had cake and ice cream much earlier in the day – in part so Sun could enjoy the celebration before jetting off to Milan, but even more importantly, because no one thought it was a good idea to feed Jay and Ji Yeon ice cream and cake so close to bedtime. So, they did cake and ice cream at lunch. Juliet made a big deal to point out that, indeed, Miles' cake had birthday candles just as she promised way back on his actual day of birth that it would.

With official celebrations long since over, they were just sitting on the back deck, chatting, laughing, drinking. And this was the mental snapshot he wanted. His first real family. Three years had passed, but due to the insanity of time travel, they were all the exact same age they'd been that night 30 years ago. Jin had shorter hair, and a more relaxed look, knowing for 100% certain that his wife and child where A-OK. Miles looked much more himself in cargo pants, Chuck Taylors, and a vintage t-shirt than he'd ever looked in a Dharma jumpsuit. Juliet? Well, she'd probably tell you that the Miami humidity was doing no favors to her hair, which was escaping her ponytail in small ringlets. And he wouldn't mention she was looking somewhat rumpled after her adventure wrangling Jay into the bath tonight. Because when she caught his eye over the rim of her wine glass, it really didn't matter.

Miles had been going on at length about the new girl he was seeing. "It may turn out to be something serious," he'd said. After Miles went on for some time length about how great she was, how fun, good looking, and smart, Jin had finally had enough.

"So, this Dorothy, she is blind?"

"What? No. What made you think that?!?!" Miles asked.

"She is dating you. I just thought . . ." Jin trailed off as the group laughed. Miles held up the ring, index, and middle fingers on his right hand. "Read between the lines, Jin, read between the lines."

Juliet finished her wine, set the glass down, and said in Miles' defense, "Of course she's not blind. Miles is a very attractive man. Jin, that's a horrible thing to say."

"Thank you, Juliet," Miles smiled, genuinely grateful. James chuckled. He could see what was coming from a mile away, but Miles, out of practice dealing with Juliet, was completely oblivious.

"You're quite welcome, Miles," said Juliet. "I mean, no way she's blind. I just assumed she was deaf. I can't imagine any woman wanting to deal with your mouth . . ."

"Ho ho ho," said Miles, clearly not amused, as Jin collapsed laughing. Miles didn't even bother with "read between the lines" as he stuck his right middle finger in Juliet's face.

"Daddy, I think there's a lion in my room."

James turned to see Jay standing at the sliding glass door. Geez. Hadn't they worn him out today? Was he really not asleep yet?

"I'll go," said Juliet, standing up. She took Jay's hand. "Let's go, buddy, let's see what we can do about this lion." The wandered off, closing the sliding door to the deck behind them.

The men sat in silence for awhile. Miles eventually turned to Jin. "So, how'd everything go yesterday?"

"Fine, I guess," Jin answered. "Juliet says we will not know anything for two weeks."

Miles chuckled. He said, "You know, we've been through a lot of weird shit together, but I gotta say, nothing is weirder than the fact that your wife," here he indicated James, "knocked up your wife," and here a gesture for Jin. "And now she's at it again! That's freaking bonkers." James and Jin both sort of shrugged. Maybe with no reaction from them, Miles would drop it. No luck. Miles kept on. "I mean, I know the reality is all clinical and stuff, but the mental image. . . I mean, phew. Those are some damn fine women."

James had the urge (one he'd often suppressed in their Dharma days) to bop Miles in the kisser. Maybe he would have, too, had not Jin been closer to Miles. Jin clamped a hand down on Miles' shoulder, and judging by Miles' reaction, it looked as though Jin was employing some kind of Vulcan death grip. "Uncle!" yelped Miles.

The truth was, though, Jin and Sun were in town for fertility treatment, and when they'd all realized their visit fell over Miles' birthday, the idea to have a Dharmatimes reunion was a natural conclusion. There really was no reason for them to come all the way here for something that could just as easily be done in Seoul, but it wasn't their first visit here for the very same reason.

When their memories returned, Sun was in the odd position of being thrilled to be back with Jin. In this reality, they'd never been apart, and she had difficulty reconciling the relief to see him again after three long years of believing he was dead with the simple fact that they'd only been apart for about three hours (she'd gone to see a movie) when their memories returned. Even more difficult for her, though, was the loss of Ji Yeon. Mourning their little girl, the Kwons were still faced with the fertility issues that had dogged them for the past year. Jin knew the truth behind those issues now, though, and suggested giving Juliet a call. He didn't add that he was more than a little eager to try to reconnect with his friends of the past three years, and Juliet was a start. He didn't realize that the phone call would put him right back in touch with Sawyer, too.

James remembered Juliet coming back to the apartment, somewhat dazed, one day in early October. "Sun and Jin called today," she said.

"I told ya that if people wanted to find us, they'd find us! Man, I love it when I'm right, and you're wrong. So, what's up with them?"

She ignored his gloating. "They want to fly over for fertility treatments," she said. "I tried to convince them not to. Low sperm count, they can deal with that in Korea. They don't need to fly all the way out here. Plus, all the workups, preliminary tests . . . I told them I didn't think there was time before I stop work."

"Yeah, what did they say to that?"

"They wanted to know why I was stopping work."

"And you said?" he asked.

"I didn't say anything. I just told them I'd do whatever I could to help them."

He looked at her curiously, and so she said, "James, they've lost a child. We've gained one. I'm not sure how to go about telling them, but I decided then -- I need to do what I can to help them. So, if they want my help, they've got it."

When the Kwons arrived in Miami in mid-October, James felt immense joy at seeing Jin again. They kept up a constant patter on the way back from the airport, and James felt for sure that this was what it must be like to have a brother. They kept on reminiscing until late in the evening when James eventually said, "We really should try to find Miles." As soon as the words escaped his mouth he caught Juliet's eye and resulting smirk.

"I thought they'd find us if they really wanted to," she remarked. "Man, I love it when I'm right, and you're wrong!"

"Yeah, but come on, it's Miles," he insisted. "We gotta find Miles!"

Not long after, Juliet went off to bed, after getting Sun settled in the extra bedroom. James and Jin stayed up until the wee hours, drinking beer, Googling Miles, and eventually placing a series of ridiculous "Is your refrigerator running? "Better go catch it!" crank calls. Miles played along gamely, realizing after the second call who the perpetrators were.

For James, if seeing Jin again after so many years (or however you measured the time that had passed) was like reconnecting with a brother, seeing Sun again was somewhat more problematic. Face it, they'd never been on the greatest of terms. By the time he'd spent three years in Dharmaville with Jin, though, he felt like he probably knew Sun better than any woman he'd ever known. Excepting Juliet, of course. But Sun didn't know him any better than she had on the day she'd last seen him three years ago.

"Jin says you kept him sane. He says you were his friend and are a good man," she offered. She left unsaid "I'm not sure if I buy it, but Jin says it's true, and I trust him." He'd have to prove himself to her, and wasn't really sure how. Plus, he could tell she was trying to hide it, but seeing him with Juliet clearly boggled her mind. At one point, he reached out to hold Juliet's hand and noticed Sun staring and then shaking her head in disbelief. Sun seemed to hold genuine affection for Juliet, though, and that, along with the fact that Jin was providing his seal of approval had to be the way to eventually win over Sun.

Anyway, despite all of Juliet's fretting over running them too quickly through workups and preliminaries, they left the States in late October, and called a few weeks later to say everything had been successful. James chuckled. Juliet had been this way about cars, too. She was always sure something was not quite right, worried she'd missed an important step. Inevitably, though, everything would turn out just fine, and he'd chuckle at her endless worries and perfectionism. And so it was still.

In late July, Jin and Sun welcomed a little girl they named Na-young. When they talked to Sun, she said, "I know it sounds crazy, but she looks just like Ji Yeon did." James held his tongue when they talked to the Kwons, but when they hung up the phone, he said to Juliet, "All babies look alike." She just stared at him in the way she did when she didn't agree with him, but didn't care to make an argument of it. So he added, "Except Jay, of course."

"Of course," she said.

Over the next year, though, Sun kept it up. She told them she caught herself calling the baby Ji Yeon all the time. She would preface every conversation with some version of "I know you think I'm crazy" or "I'm sure it is just what I want to see" or "I realize there is no way it's possible," until on Na-young's first birthday, Hurley flew to Seoul and got to meet the baby. He confirmed the impossible -- it wasn't just Sun seeing things. This baby looked exactly like Ji Yeon. "I think it's probably her, dude," he said. "I don't think you're crazy, Sun. Trust me, I know crazy."

So "Na-young" officially became "Ji Yeon," and although the Kwons had to make up some crazy cover story about Jin's (fake) recently deceased great-aunt, and their deep (fake) desire to honor her, eventually everyone bought it. Now Ji Yeon was nearly two, and Sun (and Hurley) had absolutely no doubt it was the same little girl. But, Sun pointed out, she was actually happier, more confident, and more social than she'd ever been before. It probably didn't hurt that she had a loving and doting dad and a mom not hell-bent on revenge.

The Kwons were now back, hoping to provide Ji Yeon with a little brother or sister. And if had gone well over the past week, they'd be sharing the good news in a few weeks. A few weeks, James now realized, that he'd have to listen to Juliet agonize and explain in nit-picking, minute detail everything that could possibly go wrong, everything she hadn't done quite right, and how the whole thing was sure to fail. He was sure that when they called to say Sun was pregnant, Juliet would chalk the whole thing up to a grand stroke of luck. And he would roll his eyes.

Lion-in-the-room crisis averted, Jay settled, Juliet listened in at the door to the room Jin and Ji Yeon were sharing. Silence on that front. She jogged downstairs, and stopped off in the kitchen for a bottle of wine and few beers from the fridge, before stepping out onto the deck. James looked at her in question, and she nodded. That was the "All OK up there?" "Yeah, he's back to sleep," conversation. She handed James and Miles fresh beers, and began to pour more wine for herself and Jin. "Sounds like Ji Yeon's sound asleep," she reported to him.

She took her seat and turned to Miles. "I've got a bone to pick with you Miles," she started. "Guess what Jay asked me? 'Mommy, why Uncle Miles put his finger in your face?' He wants to know why you flipped me the bird. We invite you to our home for one night and you corrupt our son."

"I'm corrupting your son?" pooh-poohed Miles. "You kidding me?" He leaned in closer to her. "I'm sorry, but have you met your child's father? Or listened to him for any length of time? I'm surprised Jay's first words weren't 'sonofabitch'."

"Jesus Christ! I'm fucking workin' on it you little asshole!" James yelped in mock indignation.

When they'd recovered from laughter, Juliet looked seriously at Miles. Miles loved Miami, so he came to visit several times a year. He was surprisingly good with Jay. He'd first visited when Jay was little more than a year old and volunteered to stay with him so she and James could go on a date. She remembered exchanging a "He's got to be kidding look" with James. Miles caught the look and was indignant. "You think I'm any worse with a kid than he is?" he said, indicating James.

He was still Miles, a talky, whiny, chattering cynic. But he was more relaxed. Knowing the truth about his parents seemed to have mellowed him out a great deal. He no longer had the jumpy, nervous energy that used to drive her bananas.

He seemed really crazy about this new girl he'd been seeing. She could tell that as excited and happy he was to talk about her, he was actually trying to keep a lid on how great she really was, how happy she really made him. Good for Miles, she thought. Good that someone could give as well as she got and keep Miles on his toes.

"So, Miles," she asked him now, "tell us more about this new girl. Should I be expecting a wedding invitation in the mail?"

"No you should not," he stated flatly.

"Why not? I thought she was great," Juliet inquired.

"Oh, she's great, and yeah, I guess I can see marrying her, but you've got another think coming if you think you'll be invited. I'm still really hurt, you know."

Now James piped in. "Ah fuck, man." Here Miles waved his hands at James, gesturing like one of Bob Barker's girls on the Price is Right. Juliet realized he was still trying to make a point about the cursing and the alleged "corruption of Jay" through the flipping-the-bird incident. But James ignored him and kept right on talking. "Are you still pissed about that? That was two years ago, and how many times do I got to tell ya, it wasn't a big thing. Jesus, you're as bad as a chick."

"I agree with Miles, we should have been there," said Jin. Great. Another precinct heard from.

The "thing" in question was their wedding. Or, well, "wedding," or whatever you wanted to call it. It wasn't a "big thing," a mere formality, really. James now started going on and on about how if he had had any say about it, they would have had a huge blowout in a church and a cake and a band and a limo and . . . and it was all a Big Huge Lie, and the more detailed he got about how he had always dreamed of tuxes and flowers and the first dance and the open bar and the invitations and the rehearsal dinner, the more obvious it became to both Jin and Miles that he was kidding.

They'd just gone in to the Justice of the Peace one day, and truth be told, she remembered a lot more about the fancy dinner date they went to afterward, and the night they spent in a hotel room while Dad and Nancy kept Jay. What a wonderful night it had been! Jay wasn't yet four months old, and the sheer luxury of sleeping straight on through the night was what she remembered most of all. Sad, really, but true.

Jay was a happy and easygoing baby, but good grief, the boy loved to eat. Many a night she would stumble out of bed to feed him and the logical side of her would say "this won't go on forever," but sometimes it seemed as if it just would. He would never, ever, ever, stop eating.

James, of course, was quick to notice. He helped where he could, but was essentially stuck twiddling his thumbs while Jay ate. And ate and ate and ate. "Lucky bastard," he said one day when Jay was maybe two months old. And eating, as usual.

"You know I don't like that word," she responded.

"He is lucky. Jesus – look where he spends 95% of his waking hours. If you let me do that, I'd be set for life."

She could muster no more than an eyeroll. "You know I didn't mean 'lucky'."

"Oh, 'bastard'? That's what bothers you? I guess it bothers you that back at Thanksgiving I went on and on about how I thought it would be . . .what was the word I used? . . oh yeah, 'tacky,' that's it! Yeah, how I thought it would be tacky to get married when the bride couldn't even bend down to tie her own shoes."

She just stared at him. Jay kept eating.

So, James went on. "Oh, that's right! That wasn't me who said all that. That was you. And, I been watchin'. You seem to be tying your own damn shoes just fine lately. So, until you get over whatever hangup it is you got about getting married, I can call him whatever the hell I want. Besides, you know I didn't mean it that way."

"It's the 21st Century, and I don't see why it's so important to get married," she said. She'd been married. "Trust me. It's not that great." In fact, they'd been over this a million times. It pretty much always ended in a big fight over how he was different from Edmund, how she was different than she used to be and blah blah blah blah blah. It made her panicky to think about even risking it, and she didn't want to do it.

For now, though, all he said was "Fine."

She was kind of hoping for an argument. So she kept up, "Seriously? What's the big deal? It's not Victorian England. Are you worried your illegitimate son won't be able to inherit your vast estates?"

"You're right," he responded. Damn. She really wanted a fight. He kept on, "I'm just sayin', you don't got a leg to stand on when it comes to this one."

She fully expected him to keep harassing her about it, or even worse, to dream up some dramatic, romantic proposal offer. That didn't suit him. It didn't suit them. But, he tucked away his arguments and let it be. He did start the extremely annoying habit of nicknaming Jay. "Chubby bastard." "Drooly bastard," "Bald bastard," "Giggly little bastard." She hated it. But James would look at her and dare her to make an issue of it. And she really had no leg to stand on. He kept it up. He would keep it up, she realized, until she gave in.

On their wedding night, lounging in their fancy hotel room, she was so glad she had given in. She'd been so unreasonably fearful. She'd been panicked that somehow getting married would change everything, and she'd be a "wife" again, and back to the old, timid, wallflower version of herself. How utterly irrational, she thought, watching James call Dad and Nancy one last time. She could hear Dad on the other end. "Stop calling us. He's fine. If we need anything, we'll call. Now just have fun."

So, they had no proposal story, no engagement, no wedding, no reception, no party. And even though more than two years had passed, Jin and, especially, Miles were still put out over it.

James was giving Miles a hard time "Ooooooooh. No invitation to your wedding. That hurts sooooo much Miles. Damn, all it means is we ain't gotta spring for a gift. Fine by me." He threw a balled up napkin at Miles. Jin was laughing.

She missed this, she realized. She missed the four of them drinking and laughing and teasing each other about every, single nit-picky thing. She missed the exaggerated dumbfounded look Miles put on whenever anyone said anything he thought was stupid. She missed seeing Jin cover his mouth with his hand whenever he started to laugh at something he thought was inappropriate. Just spending a nice, warm evening with the only three people in the world who knew the whole truth about her.

She wouldn't go back, though. She didn't miss the claustrophobia; she didn't miss being a mechanic; she didn't miss the back-of-the-mind fear that it was all going to fall in like a house of cards (and that's exactly what happened, wasn't it?); she didn't miss not knowing if she'd ever see her family again; she didn't miss wondering "is this all there is? And all there will ever be?"

Tomorrow she'd spend the day with Jin and Ji Yeon, and she'd go to the aquarium with her husband and son. They'd spend most of their time watching the alligators, because Jay was fascinated by them. This weekend, she'd meet her sister and her nephew for a picnic in the park. Jin and Miles would be gone by then, and she'd miss them terribly and start to wonder when they could all get together again, but she wouldn't trade it. Not for anything would she trade it.

OK, sappy ending I know. Sorry. OK, I still think there is a little more to tell. Actually, I have a lot in mind for them at their next update a few more years down the road, so the next bit may end up being quite long. Thanks for still reading!