Author's Note: Hellooooo! I have failed you all! Here I thought I'd have more time to write this summer but as it turned out, I went to Disneyland for the first time, then camping, then a friend needed help with his booth at Comic Con so of course I went to that! Then company came to stay… my point is that my silence hasn't been willful! I have been working on this story here and there as I can, and I finally have a new chapter for you all. I hope your summers have been as wonderful and exciting as mine!

Managing Mischief

25. Missing the Train

The rest of the summer passed in relative peace, which was a welcome change for James and Sirius. The two built a fort in the woods, played endless games of backyard Quidditch, and went on many day trips to the local river to float about on the hotter days. In fact, the boys were having such a great time living at their own easy pace that they didn't even notice the fact that it was now September 1st.

You see, James' parents had left for several days, assuming the boys were old enough to keep track of the date on the calendar. James and Sirius had tried, for the most part, but the problem was, they were having so much fun playing in the empty house that one day literally blended into the next. In fact, James was getting rather alarmed by how absorbed Sirius was by their game.

On the morning that he was meant to be at Platform 9 ¾, James Potter was heading downstairs in his robe, only to be tackled by a snarling Sirius pretending to be a velociraptor. James tumbled down the last few stairs with a shout and was surprised to feel Sirius' teeth on his neck.

"Dead!" Sirius announced as he leapt off the taller boy and hopped off to hide behind the couch.

"Asshole," James snapped, rubbing his neck. "Don't you wanna take a break from pretending to be a dinosaur? You've been at it for days."

"I'm not pretending. I AM a dinosaur!"

"Right." James sighed and got up, heading into the kitchen to pour himself a mug of hot water. He studied the calendar as he sipped, noticing for the first time that he hadn't checked the date in a while. "Is today the 30th or 31st?"

When Sirius didn't answer, James looked over to find the other boy miming getting stuck in a tar pit and slowly suffocating. He then collapsed onto the carpet and began to twitch. He slowly curled in his legs then stopped moving altogether.

"What're you doing?" James asked.

It took a while, but Sirius eventually whispered "Fossilizing."

James set down his mug. "I need a picture of this."

Sirius, who was now a fossil, didn't react. James headed upstairs to grab his phone and had just enough time to snap a picture before Sirius leapt to his feet and proceeded to "discover" his own fossil. "I'm a paleontologist now," Sirius said. "And I've just made the greatest discovery of my career!"

James smirked as he saved the photo on his phone. He was about to turn it off when he noticed the date. September 1st. "Sirius…"

"It's an entire fossilized skeleton, with what appear to be scale imprints in the ancient mud," Sirius narrated as he pretended to brush away sand with James' toothbrush.

"Sirius…"

"This is a massive breakthrough for our field. Ever since the extinction –" Sirius cut himself off as he pretended that the fossil came back to life and killed his nemesis: the extinction-believing paleontologist.

"Sirius, it's nearly 11!"

Sirius lay on the ground, gurgling as he held his hand to an imaginary gash at his throat.

"Crap! Grab your trunk!" Dashing the water in his mug down the drain, James darted upstairs.

Sirius slowly lifted his head and peered at him through his mop of hair. "Huh?"

"The Hogwarts Express!" James shouted from his room. "We're about to miss it!"

"Don't be silly, James," Sirius said as he sat up. "It doesn't leave for days yet."

"Today!"

Sirius hurried up the stairs and stuck his head into their shared room. "But… it's almost eleven!"

"I know!" James was frantically throwing whatever he saw into his trunk, including his pillows. When it wouldn't close, he yanked them back out.

"But I haven't got anything ready!" Sirius shouted, tugging on his hair as he climbed up onto his bed.

"Bloody hell," James growled as he fought his trunk closed. "This is why kids are meant to have sodding parents who are actually around!"

"My mum's –" Sirius began to bark defensively but was cut off.

"Not yours – mine! They're always gone or out on the bloody lounge chair!" Just then, his phone rang. He wouldn't have answered in such a situation unless it was one person. "Hi, Lily."

"James!" she hissed. "Where in Merlin's name are you two? We've saved a spot in our compartment but –"

"On my way!" James hanged up as he dressed.

Sirius was carefully packing his dinosaurs into the bottom of his trunk.

"We don't have time for that!" James grabbed the rest of them and threw them in.

"Oi! Careful!"

"The train's about to leave and we can't apparate. LET'S GO."

Sirius gave James a grumpy look then shut his trunk. "You don't have to be so pushy."

"Yes, I do!" James hauled his trunk out of his room and Sirius followed him. "This is all your fault! You and that bloody dinosaur game…"

"That's not fair! You were playing, too."

"If you call wandering around my own house and getting randomly attacked at all hours, as if you were a cat, playing…"

Sirius' trunk stopped just inside the doorway with a thud. He glared at James. "You dare compare me, me, to a C-A-T?!"

"GRAB YOUR TRUNK!"

"WE'LL MISS IT ANYWAY!"

"We have to try!" James started hauling Sirius' trunk behind him, as well. "LILY is saving a seat for me!"

"Who cares? We'll sit next to Remus, anyway." Sirius followed James. If the older boy was content lugging his trunk for him, then there was no need to strain himself by offering to pick it back up.

The veins in James' forehead were bulging as he lugged both trunks down the driveway. "Lock up the house," he grunted.

Sirius did as he was asked then skipped ahead of James, leading the way to King's Cross station. They arrived at 11:24 AM. James let the trunks fall, his face shifting from red to white. "I can't believe it…" he said brokenly. "We've missed the train."

"I'm sure plenty of kids have missed the train before," Sirius said, sounding far too chipper. "We'll just get on the next one."

James slowly looked to him. "Sirius, there is no next one."

"Not another one of ours, sure, but there are…" He leaned in and cupped a hand over James' ear as he whispered. "Muggle trains."

James wiped the sweat off his brow. "They won't get us there."

"Why not? They go north, just like ours. We get close then walk or something. We can owl once we're in a village and have a teacher come fetch us."

The taller boy just stared at the empty tracks. He didn't much like the plan, but it was the only one they had. "All right. We'll do it."

"Excellent!"

James handed Sirius some Muggle money and the smaller boy bought them two tickets. Sirius hummed to himself, swinging his feet (that didn't quite touch the ground) as they waited on a bench for their train to Scotland. James was inconsolable. Not over having missed the train to Hogwarts, but having missed out on his one chance to sit in a compartment with Lily Evans for the duration of the ride.

Once the train arrived, the two boys hauled their trunks in and took their seats. Sighing, James looked out the window while Sirius quietly read a dinosaur book. After several hours and a few stops, however, it became clear to James that their plan wasn't going to work. "Sirius… we're heading east."

"So?"

"So we ought to be heading north."

"I'm sure we will. The ticket says Kelso, as in Scotland."

James adjusted his glasses as he pulled out his ticket and read it. "It says Kelso, Lincolnshire. As in the east coast. Sirius, we're going the wrong way!"

"How was I supposed to know there were two Kelsos?"

"I don't know how you even knew there was one! Crap…"

Sirius pulled the emergency stop cord.

"What're you doing?" James hissed.

"Getting off!"

As the train ground to a halt, the two teens grabbed their trunks and hopped off before they'd have to answer any questions. They hid in some bushes until the engine started up again and chugged away.

"Great," James muttered. "We're gonna get expelled."

Sirius furrowed his brow. "Why?"

"Because we're so late! The Hogwarts Express is probably close to school by now!"

"Then let's start walking." Sirius grabbed his trunk and hauled it out onto the tracks. "There's a junction up ahead. We'll follow the set that goes north and we'll be there in no time."

Sighing, James pulled leaves out of his hair and followed. "My life sucks!"

Sirius rolled his eyes.

The two continued in relative silence until they reached the fork in the tracks. Sirius squinted, eyeing the sun, then turned north. James watched him silently get his bearings and realized that after all his adventures in the Congo, this must seem like a minor incident instead of the end of life as he knew it. "Well, maybe it doesn't suck," James amended. "But all this walking does."

"The human being evolved to walk over 50 miles a day, James. You'll be fine."

"You sound like a paleontologist."

Sirius whipped his head around, his long hair flying. "Do not!"

James cracked a crooked smile. "I was joking!"

Sirius shot him a skeptical glance then returned his eyes to the tracks ahead. James sighed. Maybe things really aren't so bad, he thought. I mean, Lily saved a seat for me, which still counts even though I couldn't take it. And it's a beautiful day. No sign of rain and the sun is shining. Not too warm, either. Really a perfect day for a stroll. And I can totally walk fifty miles. In fact, I could probably walk a hundred…

A flock of birds flew by overhead. "You know," James said. "This is actually kind of fun."

Sirius smiled. "I love being outside."

"Yeah. And like, this way, Lily and the others might get a little worried about us, and then like, we'll surprise them by showing up on our own."

"I hope they don't worry."

"Well, not worry, but worry. So that we know they like us."

Sirius blinked several times. "But we know they like us, James. That's why they're our friends."

"I know, but like, like like."

Sirius' response was cut off by Elvis Presley's voice belting out "Hound Dog" as a pink convertible barreled down the tracks towards them.

James adjusted his glasses as the car approached, dust in its wake. "Where did that come from?"

"No idea."

The two boys stood to the side of the tracks as the convertible slowed. As soon as Sirius saw who was within, he stiffened. James followed his gaze and had to fight the urge to look away, for the driver was one of the ugliest women he'd ever seen, even with her shades and polka-dot headscarf. She looked as if she hadn't seen the sun in weeks, and her nose looked like it was botched in a plastic surgery. Her child in the seat next to her was just as ugly, only his nose was large and hooked and he had an odd pot belly.

"Need a ride?" the woman asked, turning down Elvis.

Sirius shook his head no and backed away.

"Come on," the child in the car said with a peculiar American accent. "It only costs 25 cents!"

The mother elbowed the child and he quieted.

"Really, it's no trouble," she said. "We're taking the back roads up north."

"Yeah," James replied, licking his lips. "Sure is a back road all right."

The woman giggled and snorted as she did so. Tempting as the thought of a car ride was instead of walking, James seriously doubted he could spend more than five minutes in the odd company of these two. "We're all right, actually. Thanks, though."

"You sure?" she asked, looking more at Sirius as she lowered her sunglasses and peered over them. Sirius enthusiastically nodded yes. "Well, all right then. Cheerio!" With that, she sped off in a cloud of dust. While he couldn't be sure, James thought he could hear the child cussing as the convertible took a wild turn and careened off the tracks and disappeared in the distance.

James giggled. "That was weird." He turned to look at Sirius to see that the tan boy had paled a bit. "What?"

"Do you need your bloody glasses adjusted?"

"No… why?"

"Did you not see who that was?" Sirius gestured at the fading dust.

James' eyes widened. "No way…"

"Yes way."

James held a hand to his head. "Wow… he's supposed to be dead, isn't he? All this time he's been in hiding…"

Sirius furrowed his brow. "Wait, what?"

"Michael Jackson," James said. "That was him, wasn't it?"

Sirius sneered slightly. "That was Lord Voldemort and Kreacher, you git!"

The tall boy's eyes widened. "Wha…?" He looked after the car but the dust had settled. "No bloody way…"

"We have to keep moving." Sirius surveyed the sky. "It'll be dark in a few hours. We'll make camp off the tracks where You Know Who can't find us."

James picked up his pace, his trunk thudding along behind him. How he wished he could use a simple floating charm on the darn thing now!

Meanwhile, the Hogwarts Express was approaching Hogsmeade and after a search of the train, Remus was growing worried over his two friends' absence. He returned to their compartment with a shake of his head as Lily met him with an expectant gaze. "Unless they're hiding in the loo, I don't see them."

Lily bit her lip and looked at her phone. "Remus… before we got on the train, James said he and Sirius were running late…"

Remus slowly sank into his seat. "Then… they…."

"Missed the train," Lily supplied with a grimace.

Remus swallowed hard. "James' mum could apparated them to Hogsmeade and from there they could –"

"His mum's gone. And his dad. Sirius' parents – or should I say parent – is no help, either."

Remus nibbled on his thumbnail as he looked out the window at the darkening countryside as the train slowed. "Knowing those two, they're trying to make it here on their own. But they never will."

Lily stiffened. "Right. We've got to tell a teacher."

"Exactly."

Darkness had already settled in the countryside further south, and Sirius prodded at the flames of a small fire he had started from a bird's nest and some flint and steel he had tucked into his trunk. He carefully added more branches then sat down next to James, flicking his long hair out of his face. "That's better."

James was hunched in a ball and kept glancing around him into the dark nervously. "Are you sure, like, there are no predators?"

Sirius arched a brow, not that it was very visible. "Unless you're worried about giants and centaurs, I think you're safe. The last bear in the UK died in the Dark Ages."

James stiffly uncurled a bit. "It did?"

"Duh. Everyone knows that."

"Oh… yeah… right." James nodded and scooted a little closer to the flames. "So we can actually, like… sleep out here?"

Sirius stretched out on his back. "Why not?"

"I mean, we don't exactly have pillows or…" James waited for Sirius to jump in with an explanation of how one builds pillows and blankets while camping, but the other boy was silent. "I mean, I will have to go to the bathroom. Eventually."

"Just pee in the bushes."

"No, like… the other one."

"We haven't even eaten!"

"Don't remind me," James groaned. He'd been banishing thoughts of pizza all day. "What do you reckon they're having at the welcome feast right now? The first years ought to be sorted by now."

Sirius sighed. "Trust me, thinking about food when you're hungry isn't a good –" There was a pop from the railroad tracks in the distance. Then another. And another. Sirius scrambled to his feet with his wand as James did the same.

"Was that – "

"Apparating."

"So they're – "

"Death Eaters."

James swallowed hard and stepped up to his best friend's side as three hooded figures slinked out of the darkness.

"We're not allowed to use magic," James muttered. "Crap."

Sirius flicked his bangs out of his eyes and tried to make himself appear taller than he was.

"Siriusss Black, and Jamesss Potter," Voldemort hissed as he lowered his hood. "What a pleasssant sssurprise."

The two other Death Eaters remained masked. One held a wand and a chest, and the other held a… boombox? Voldemort nodded to his associates and one set down what turned out to be an ice chest and popped it open while the other started playing Finger Eleven's "Paralyzer." Voldemort nodded his head to the beat as he stepped up closer to the two confused teens.

"Mind if we… hang out?" Voldemort asked, resting a hand on Sirius' shoulder. Sirius cringed and James' hand tightened on his wand. "You see…" Voldemort flicked his wand and both James and Sirius' flew into his hand. "We were just passsing by and sssaw your fire. Nothing like drinksss with friendsss, hmm?" With that, he forced Sirius to sit down and after one red-eyed look, James did the same.

"I've already told you," Sirius began, and James could tell from the way his friend's voice was shaking that he was scared. "I don't want to be your friend. I'm sorry."

"You sssay that," Voldemort crooned as zapped a log over to him then sat down on it beside Sirius, his hand still on the small boy's shoulder. "But how do you know? We've never even hung out before."

"Um, the fact that you're a psychopath probably doesn't help," James said casually. The other two Death Eaters immediately directed their wands at him and he froze, deer-like, the fire glinting in his glasses. "Whoa…"

"Ssso let'sss all jussst calm down and have sssome fun, shall we?" Voldemort said as he used the Accio spell to shoot a bottle of firewhiskey into his hand. He nodded to one of his minions and the music was cranked up. James and Sirius exchanged a worried look.

Voldemort took a swig of the firewhiskey then passed it along to his minions, who each took a gulp as they bobbed to the music. One handed the bottle to James who sneered. "I'm not touching that shit."

Voldemort hissed but his hiss morphed into a laugh. "All the more for us, then!" He offered the bottle to Sirius who took one whiff and winced. Sighing, Voldemort took another gulp. The bottle was passed around several more times until the two minions were dancing to "Sexy And I Know It" while Voldemort lip-synched and mimed that he was on stage. "This is sssooo my sssong!" he shouted as loudly as he could.

James looked to Sirius. In his enthusiasm over LMFAO, the Dark Lord had left their wands abandoned on the log. Sirius met James' gaze and nodded once before inching his hand towards their discarded weapons. Voldemort whipped his head around and Sirius froze, but a second later he whipped it to the other side as he wiggled to the chorus of "Girl, look at that body." Relieved, Sirius snatched their wands and shoved James' into his hand.

Before they could form a plan, however, James was on his feet and had his wand leveled at the Dark Lord. Voldemort slowly stopped dancing and hissed, his minions flanking him. "Kill him."

James blinked. "Oh, shit."

Sirius shoved James aside as the two Death Eaters pointed their wands at him, but before a single green light was fired, the two minions were simultaneously hit by consecutive red blasts. The Death Eaters were knocked off their feet and James, Sirius, and Voldemort whipped their heads around to spot the source of the attack, only to see none other than Minerva McGonagall descending on a broom, her wand leveled at Voldemort.

The two glared at each other for several seconds before both shouted spells. McGonagall's shield charm protected her from Voldemort's killing curse, but the witch dodged nevertheless. A spell from one of the downed Death Eaters went awry and hit the log, shattering it into dozens of splinters. James threw himself over Sirius to shield his friend from the wooden shrapnel while Sirius barked in surprise.

McGonagall fired back and knocked the Death Eater unconscious before dodging another spell from Voldemort and firing one right back, "Sexy And I Know It" playing throughout their battle. With a hiss, Voldemort took to the sky, grabbed his boom box and disapparated.

Panting, McGonagall lowered to the ground and casually zapped the second Death Eater when he started to stir. Sirius and James, a little singed but otherwise unhurt, stared up at their professor in wide-eyed awe. She had just taken on the Dark Lord and won.

"Now," she began. "Which one of you wants to tell me what you're doing out here?"

Stiffly untangling themselves from each other, the boys got to their feet. "We missed the train," Sirius said quietly, dusting himself off and looking around at the charred craters from the spells that had missed their marks.

"We thought we'd…" James began.

"Walk?" McGonagall finished. "And where, may I ask, is the common sense in that?"

Both teens looked shamefully to the ground.

"You're lucky you weren't killed!"

"We didn't know You Know Who was gonna show up," James muttered.

"Who?"

"It's what we call Lord Voldemort," Sirius said, finally looking up. "Thank you for helping us, Professor."

McGonagall adjusted her robes. "Believe it or not, I do have better things to do than go hunting for two wayward students after dark, but you're welcome, Mr. Black. If Miss Evans hadn't told me when she did, I don't know what state I would have found you in."

James' dark thoughts were cut off by the memory of red hair. "Lily told you?"

"Yes." McGonagall cast a charm above the unconscious Death Eaters to notify the Ministry. "She and Mr. Lupin were concerned. You should count yourselves lucky to have such devoted friends."

James slowly grinned. Sirius mimicked McGonagall and began scuffing dirt over the scorch marks to hide them from Muggles. When they were done, the Head of Gryffindor used a spell to lengthen her broom then the three flew to Hogwarts.

Once safe inside the hallway outside the Great Hall, McGonagall fixed the two with a stern look. "Now, rumors began to spread as soon as the other students noticed that we professors were, well, flustered. So please, do your best to not cause a scene?"

Both boys nodded. "Professor, could I talk to you later about something? It's important." James asked.

"I'll be in my office tonight."

Sirius shot James a questioning look but James quelled his curiosity with a "it's nothing" expression, for he didn't know how to tell his friend that he felt the need to warn their Head of House about the events over the summer and the Dark Lord's obsession with the heir of the House of Black.

McGonagall pushed open the large double doors and the chatter inside immediately quieted as all heads turned to the entryway. Once James and Sirius stepped in, the hall erupted in cheers. You see, the rumor was that not only had the boys battled with Death Eaters, but that they were killed in the battle. Seeing them both alive and well, if not a little dirty, set everyone's heart's alight, though a few people weren't quite sure if Sirius was Sirius given his darker complexion.

Lily and Remus rose from their seats and ran over to the two. Though Remus hugged them both, the only hug that James remembered from that night was Lily's.

*In Kreacher's husky voice* 25 cents for your thoughts? ;)