Author Note: Thanks for the continuing great response to this story! There was a little bit of softening toward Edward after the last chapter! Still, I get responses ranging from "great talk" to "they barely scraped the surface."

Bonus update today to take advantage of the fact that I'm not working all week.

Thanks again to moosals and NKubie for pre-reading. Stephenie Meyer owns all characters.

Chapter 25 — Anniversary

When I wake up the following Saturday, I don't want to get out of bed. I never want to get out of bed when this day comes along. Of course, it doesn't often fall on a weekend, so I have to get up. Today I plan to take advantage of the fact that I have no reason to move from my cozy spot under the covers.

Once I've explained the significance of the day to Alice, she offers to bring me a smoothie for breakfast from the Tropical Smoothie Café in the Student Recreation Facility.

While she's gone, my mind goes back over the last week. As I'd expected and feared, I had to deal with questions from Tyler in Biology on Tuesday morning. When he asked if Edward is "the guy," I had to admit that yes, he is. It was obvious that Tyler didn't recognize Edward though, and I didn't volunteer that little bit of info.

Speaking of Edward, I didn't see him all week, though Emmett came over Wednesday afternoon to tutor me in Calculus. I think maybe I almost get it now, but thank God this is the only math course I need to take in college.

Emmett said his brother has been hard at work writing song after song for their next album, so I don't want to bother him. I figure he'll come to me if he wants to hang out; I'm not reaching out to him. I try hard to believe Emmett's explanation and not the part of my brain telling me Edward may be with other girls. That's a large part of why I refused his advances — so I don't have to worry about where he is when he's not with me.

Unfortunately, I still worry.

When Alice returns, I grudgingly sit up to drink my breakfast. "Do you wanna talk about it?" she asks gently.

I shake my head, sipping my smoothie. "You know, you can go out if you want to," I assure her. "You don't need to sit here and babysit me all day."

"I have plans with Jasper, but not until later. I can stay until then." Alice sits on her own bed, typing away on her phone; I imagine she's texting Jasper.

Of course, eventually I have to get up when I need to use the bathroom, so I go ahead and brush my teeth while I'm there, crawling back under the covers when I'm done.

When my phone rings, I look at the number on the screen, closing my eyes when I see my dad's number.

"Hi, Dad," I answer it.

"Hey, Bells." His voice sounds so sad, so tired.

"Is Billy there with you?" I don't like my father to be alone on this day.

"Yeah, we're watching some college football game on TV. What about you?"

"My roommate is here babysitting me." I look up at Alice, who sticks her tongue out at me.

"I was thinking," he pauses to clear his throat, "I was thinking of going to her grave next weekend. I thought I could never set foot in Seattle again, but I managed, driving you to the airport."

"I think that's a great idea, Dad," I reply, feeling myself tear up.

"I know she's not really there — not her spirit, anyway — but…"

"I get it." And I do. I've always felt almost disloyal for the fact that I haven't visited my own mother's grave since shortly after she was buried, before Dad and I left Seattle for good.

"You still planning on coming home for Christmas?"

I close my eyes, taking a deep breath. "Yeah, but I don't have a flight yet. My last day of finals is the 12th, so I'll probably have to be out of my room the next day. I-I'll let you know when I book a flight."

"I miss you, kid."

"I miss you too, Dad."

We chat for another few minutes about everything and nothing. The tears don't start until after I hang up. Tears for a life cut way too short — she wasn't even 30, for God's sake. And tears for the life I could've had if only Mom hadn't been working that fateful day.

I wonder sometimes if it's my fault she's dead. If she'd never gotten pregnant with me, she could've gone on to college, become the schoolteacher she'd always dreamed of being. I know she wouldn't have been a bank teller, that's for sure.

Angela told me I was an idiot the first time I was brave enough to tell her that. Doesn't mean it's not still there in the back of my mind though.

Alice sits with me as I lie there, trying to brush my hair back, but I just need to cry it out. Her phone pings and she gets up to check it.

"I'm going to the bathroom," she states suddenly.

"Whatever," I give a half-hearted shrug. I don't need a play-by-play.

I don't bother to open my eyes when the door opens a couple of minutes later. I hear Alice's footsteps walking across the floor for a few seconds, then the sound of the door closing, as if she'd forgotten to close it and had to go back and do it.

Odd. But not odd enough to make me open my eyes.

"Bella?"

That's not Alice's voice.

I blink my eyes open, narrowing them at where Edward stands in front of the door. Alice is nowhere in sight.

"What are you doing here?" I croak out, sitting up and holding my blanket to my chest. My pajama top is a t-shirt, but I'm not wearing a bra.

"Alice asked me to come." Why that little…

"I don't need a babysitter," I grumble. "Where'd she get your number?"

"From Jasper," he shrugs. Oh yeah, of course.

He takes his leather jacket off, revealing that beige thermal top I love so much. I try not to stare as he walks over to me, pulling his boots off as he sits down beside me. I don't even protest when he gathers me into his arms.

The tears start up again, full force, the moment he's holding me.

"Bella," he whispers. "Shhh… it's ok."

I shake my head, unable to explain right now how Edward's presence, and all he represents, has made everything worse. He squeezes me tighter and I try to breathe him in, try to let his scent calm me as it always does. He combs his fingers through my hair — which I haven't brushed — and I try to concentrate on his soft touches.

When my tears finally stop, I reluctantly pull away from him, reaching for the box of tissues. I look back at Edward after I've wiped my face and he crooks his finger. With a small smile, I go back to the safety of his arms.

"So… this is the date your mom died?" he asks tentatively. I nod, knowing he can feel it. "Is it this bad every year?"

"No," I whisper. "It's worse this year because… because she'll never meet her granddaughter. And my baby will never know her grandmother."

Edward squeezes me a little tighter. "And," I continue, "What if a month from now, I don't have my dad either?"

"That's not going to happen, Bella."

"You don't know that," I cry in frustration.

"Bella, what kind of man would he be if he walked away from his daughter because she's about to make him a grandpa?"

I turn and look at him. "Maybe the same kind of man who'd turn away his pregnant girlfriend and never see his son?"

At the stricken look on his face, I immediately backtrack. "Oh God… I didn't mean…"

Edward shakes his head. "No, you're right. My dad's an asshole. But I know that your dad isn't like that."

"How do you know that?" I whisper. He's never met my dad!

"Because he raised you, and you're the best person I know." He gives me a tiny smile and I can't help returning it.

"Why don't you lie down," he suggests, lying back along the wall.

"I—"

"I'll stay on top of the covers," he adds, rolling his eyes.

Slowly, I lie back down, facing away from Edward, a little startled when I feel his arm come around me, rubbing lightly on my stomach for a few minutes. He then lifts my hair out of the way, placing it underneath my head, and rubs my shoulder.

"Will you tell me about your mom, Bella?"

I smile to myself, trying to remember her. "She was a great mom," I begin quietly. "Not like one of those TV moms who always has a plate of cookies ready after school. She had so many dreams, and she liked to try new things. She did yoga and Pilates, saying she didn't want to look like a mom. One year she took a pottery class and I remember the ugly ashtrays she made everyone for Christmas that year whether they smoked or not," I chuckle.

I hear Edward's chuckle behind me before he places a kiss on my shoulder, over my t-shirt.

"She believed in crystals, and how they could heal you. She, um, grew up in Sedona, Arizona, and that kind of thing was really popular there. She had this bracelet she always wore that was supposed to," I pause, choking up a little, "Supposed to keep anything bad from happening to you."

I feel Edward take a deep breath, then he brings his hand up, kneading my tense shoulder.

"Tell me about the day she died," he whispers.

I swallow thickly, taking a deep breath.

"It was just an ordinary day. I got up, went to school… A neighbor usually watched me after school while Mom and Dad were still at work, but that day when I got home, Dad was already there. He-he sat me down and he told me that God had asked my mommy to come and live with him."

A sob chokes me and Edward's arms pull me tighter, his lips placing soft kisses everywhere he can reach. The first time he touches bare skin, I break out in goosebumps. I may even whimper a little.

"At her funeral it was so surreal, seeing her lying there in a casket. I remember they — they put lipstick on her, and she never wore lipstick. There were so many people there, people I didn't know — all of her co-workers, the other guys on the police force with my dad… even the mayor. They all repeated that it was such a shock, so sudden, and how awful it was.

"My grandmother fainted when she walked up to the casket. And everyone just kept telling me what a pretty dress I had on. After she was buried, everyone came back to our house for little sandwiches; I think our neighbor made them."

Edward is stroking my arm now, dropping kisses on the back of my neck… it's starting to get hard to think.

"I didn't find out what had happened to her until I went back to school. All the other kids were talking about it. It was all over the news, I guess — bank robbery gone wrong. These kids who had known me since kindergarten suddenly didn't know what to say to me anymore.

"Sometimes I wonder how my life would've been different if Mom had lived," I whisper. "Dad moved us to Forks over Christmas break. I was the odd one out, the new kid for a while, before I became friends with Angela. I definitely went through an awkward phase," I chuckle. "Thank God for Angela's mom when I needed to get my first bra, and… other things."

I can feel myself blushing, my skin heating up. Edward's lips touch that spot where my neck meets my shoulder, sucking gently, and…

I roll over slightly, turning my head a little bit to face him. Eyes closed, he leans in to brush a soft kiss along my burning skin, hitting my lips instead. His eyes fly open and he stares at me for a moment. When I don't protest, he moves his lips slowly over mine, kissing me softly… like our first kiss.

I know I shouldn't do this, but he's making me feel something other than pain and loss. I part my lips, but he keeps his kisses slow, almost chaste. His mouth feels so good, so good; he has the most perfect lips ever.

"Fuck," he whispers suddenly, leaning his forehead on my shoulder. "Sorry. Please don't hit me."

I grin a little, turning back over. Sighing, Edward pulls me closer and I close my eyes, trying to concentrate on the feel of his hard, warm body pressed up against mine.

My head is spinning. When he's sweet like this, I can almost forget that he's a manwhore and just remember the person he can be when he's with me. I shouldn't even let him hold me like this, it's too intimate, but… I don't want to move away.

"Relax, Bella," he whispers, his hand moving down to rub my stomach again. Desire courses through me as I remember the very first time he told me to "relax" — and everything that happened afterward. There's a soft smile on my face as I succumb to unconsciousness.

~*~*GN*~*~

When I wake up, I'm startled for a minute before I realize that I'm still in Edward's arms. I can hear his even breaths behind me and I realize he's fallen asleep, too.

Very slowly and carefully I turn over in his arms until we're facing each other. If it's possible, he looks so much younger in his sleep, almost angelic — though I know he's no angel.

I wiggle out one arm from where it's anchored between us, bringing it up to touch his perfect features. I smooth down his eyebrows, then move to tracing his lips. He parts them a little, sighing softly, and I stop, afraid that I've woken him up.

It doesn't appear that I have, but just the little scare has freaked me out, so I decide to stop being a creeper. Instead, I slide my hand around Edward's back, hugging myself closer to him. I tuck my head under his chin, sighing in contentment.

"You didn't have to stop," he mumbles.

Shocked, I lean back to look at his face, at the tiny smirk on his lips. "I thought you were asleep."

"Mmm…" he smiles, looking down at me. The look in his eyes is just… gah. He reaches out, brushing my hair behind my ear before caressing the side of my face again and again.

I lick my lips involuntarily. I want to kiss him. He wants to kiss me, I know he does. But he only watches me.

And finally it sinks in — he's waiting for me. If I want to feel Edward's lips again, I'm going to have to make the first move.

And though I know it's a bad idea — I haven't reached the point where I can just forgive and forget, and I don't want something casual with him — I want his comfort. I want to feel the way that only Edward can make me feel.

I lean in slowly, across the few inches that separate us. Edward tilts his head, moving a little closer, but it's like we're both afraid to make that final move.

A/N: Back to the cliffhangers! Should Bella kiss him? Will he let her?

Reason For Living has 2,695 reviews, and this one has 2,577 as of the time of posting. Can we get it past the mark to become my most-reviewed story?

Next update on Wednesday. I'll delay the next one then to Saturday, since we have Thanksgiving in the US on Thursday and then Black Friday!

Thanks to all who voted for The Fourth Floor in Round 2 in the TwiFic Fandom Awards for Favorite Ficlette (non-expanded one-shot)! Voting is now over, but the results are not going to be announced until December 6.