A/N: I'm glad you guys liked the last chapter! A big thanks and shout out to LovelyAmberLight for her thoughts and advice-she's amazing!
Reply to: Thevoiceslockedaway: Yes, yes you may! ;D XD
Disclaimer: You know the drill. *waves you on*
A Writer Required
Chapter Twenty-Five
It was strange, but both Jareth and Andrew had started to act differently. They both began to visit more often, and occasionally, would arrive when one of them was already present. Such an event made both behave irritably, though Andrew considerably more so.
Jareth had been acting oddly since the bus accident. He'd spend moments in deep concentration when he visited, seeming to be somewhere else. And the way he looked at me...it was a look I had not seen before. It was almost urgent. Almost as if he were checking on me, assuring himself of something. Each time, he'd seem to catch himself, and his expression would ease slightly until he appeared reassured. He seemed to need slight physical contact as well, as very often he would throw his arm absently across the back of the seat I'd be occupying, his arm just barely meeting with my back. He seemed more at ease this way, and I didn't mind-if anything, I felt safe.
Andrew had changed as well-he was more spontaneous, bringing me flowers or taking me to particularly fancy dinners. He even skipped work a few times to spend a day with me, taking me on mini road trips. He promised once we were married, he would get that promotion, and we would be able to travel the world together.
I hadn't told him-but I wasn't so sure I really wanted to marry him. I hadn't even told him I'd marry him. I hadn't accepted his proposal, though as I truthfully told Jareth, I had been considering it.
Andrew seemed to take my non-answer as a positive, though, seeing as I didn't turn him down. But the more he went on thinking this, the more I felt I was making a mistake in considering choosing him.
Was I? Was I making a mistake in choosing Andrew?
My mind remained turning over these thoughts for some time, until at last when Jareth would arrive, and I would put those thoughts to the side for the time being.
Now, Jareth and I sat at the kitchen table, my computer before me and a mug of the queen's garden tea before him, and scents from the peach cobbler I was baking in the oven, filling the air around us.
He really liked the tea, which secretly pleased me a great deal, being that I'd designed it. One of his arms was draped along the back of my chair, the other resting beside his tea.
I punched the keys on my keyboard, distracted by Jareth's nearby presence and his steady, deep voice. "I rode the dragon-" He was saying, and I was writing it down. But I found myself becoming increasingly distracted by the comforting warmth of his body and the smell of his cologne. "Amelia…" Jareth's faintly amused voice jogged me from my thoughts and I looked at him. His eyes were mirthful and his lips turned up in a smile.
"Oh-Sorry, I was-" I blushed.
"-writing down your shopping list." Jareth finished, lifting his eyebrows at the table where a handwritten list on a piece of paper sat nearby, then his eyes flicked up at the illuminated laptop screen.
Brow furrowing, my eyes followed his. There on the screen were the beginnings of the list I had for shopping; the same things on the list on the table. I ducked my head in embarrassment. "Sorry..." I apologized, deleting 'sugar, flour, dish soap…', and Jareth hummed.
"Perhaps we should stop for the day?" He suggested, and my heart fell in disappointment.
"Oh… Yeah, sure." I shrugged and avoided his gaze.
I could feel his eyes on me as I saved the document, then moved to close the laptop.
"Are you unwell? You seem distressed." He spoke quietly, leaning forward to see my face. My heart jumped and my face reddened. I pressed my lips together thin, pausing halfway through closing my laptop. Yes, I was distressed-he was distressing me. At some point in taking on this job, I'd fallen in love with him. Jareth, who only chose me because I was his last resort.
That thought alone, made my heart sink and my stomach twist.
It should have been a clue to me from the beginning that this would be strictly business. He could never love me, we could never be together, and it was foolish of me to think we could be in the first place. It was an impossibility.
A lump took up residency in my throat and no amount of swallowing could make it disappear. Tears pricked at my eyes.
'I'm such an idiot!' I thought. Now angry at myself for my tears, I closed the laptop fully with a snap. I bit the inside of my bottom lip to keep it from trembling. I would keep calm, and try to hide under a 'nothing's wrong, I'm just fine' mask. I wouldn't let him see how upset I really was. Taking a silent deep breath to quell the tears, I turned my gaze in a glance to meet Jareth's. The Goblin King's eyebrows lifted high and his eyes widened. "I'm fine." I assured him stiffly, and before he could reply, I was reaching to pick up the laptop and then standing to put it away.
His hand on the table swooped in to stop mine in a gentle grip. "No." His tone was just as gentle, surprising me out of my retreat and causing me to sit back down in my seat. I watched him warily. His eyes were entirely kind, and equally as gentle as his hold on my hand. "Now. What's wrong?" He questioned.
My face filled with color, and it took everything in me not to burst into tears and confess everything to him. Instead I worked to keep my face free of expression, and avoided the warm brown gaze I felt trying to catch mine. It was so hard for me now to keep things from him, and I was having a hard time keeping my emotions from showing. Absently I studied the laptop and ran my thumbnail idly over the side of it. A few functionless ridges had been applied to its design, only now proving useful in my attempt to distract myself, to help me think. I couldn't tell him the truth.
"I was just thinking of impossible things." I nudged one shoulder up in a listless shrug, holding up the half truth. "Things I should know better about." I added quietly. A pained smile pulled at one corner of my lips. It was not entirely successful in its efforts, for I was too upset with myself to really feel any form of humor, and I felt it quickly fall again.
Jareth leaned forward. "What do you mean?" The chair he sat in squeaked, making me wince. Just the reaction of the things around him seemed to mock me. The chair's squeak, the table's creak, and his mug of tea nearby. I was offended by them, angry at them, for further proving to me that Jareth was real. Making it harder for me to deny any kind of feelings I had for him. Feelings that I knew would endanger our relationship. I needed to push him away. I needed to push him away, and the thought was agonizing.
The timer on the oven began to beep, drawing my attention to it.
I took a shallow breath, and instead of replying, I came to my feet and left my closed laptop on the table. I got as far as the space behind my chair, when Jareth's hand-still around mine-followed, not letting go.
Surprised, I frowned at him, my heartbeat stuttering. "Let me go." I said quietly, my eyes meeting his own for a split second before looking away. There was a physical pain in my chest. Jareth had looked confused, even hurt. His lips were pulled down and his eyebrows had wrinkled the skin between them when they lifted.
I had hurt him.
The pain in my chest grew worse. He held so fast to my hand, it was hard to ignore. I wanted to squeeze his hand to convey I was fine, but I couldn't manage even that. Because in reality, I wasn't fine. I didn't want him to be hurting either, and a clean break seemed the only way to keep things from getting horribly awkward. I peered downward, focusing on our hands. With effort, I forced down the feelings building in my heart, forced them away until they only just boiled at the surface, leaving me feeling cold and empty.
"Let me go." I repeated with force, the cold in my chest entering my tone-and he did. Just as I finished speaking, Jareth released my hand. My eyes sought out his in surprise. I hadn't expected him to do it, but he'd done it, and with considerable care. His eyes were confused, frustrated, even a little sad. It made me realize then that it was true. I really had hurt him.
"I'm sorry." My heart lurched and the lump in my throat grew bigger in guilt. I bit my tongue, then offered a lousy excuse. "I think I'm just tired." I slipped past him, going toward the stove. The feel of his hand around mine lingered, and I clenched my fists at my sides, focusing on keeping my tears away. I had to stop myself from crying.
I grabbed some hot pads I'd gotten out earlier, and distractedly checked the cobbler. I didn't even register if the crust had browned properly. Turning off the timer and stove, I opened the door and reached in for the cobbler.
I was straightening back up when I heard Jareth's chair slide noisily over the cheap linoleum floor.
Startled, I turned around with the cobbler in hand to see him before me, and we collided, the peach cobbler dish flipping forward and dumping its contents onto Jareth's chest.
Everything happened very quickly, then.
Jareth shouted in pain, jumping back and pulling at his shirt to put distance between the heat and his skin.
"Oh my gosh!" I cried. "I'm so sorry!" I dropped the container into the sink, pads and all, and turned to help him.
He had managed to get his shirt unbuttoned half way before I reached him and helped him out of it, both of us avoiding stepping on the remains of the fallen cobbler on the floor between us.
I got one look at the burn and paled. It was already quite red. I herded Jareth to the kitchen bench, and retrieved a washcloth that I ran under the faucet in cool water, wringing it out before handing it to him. "Spread it over the burn and hold it there." I ordered, then moved to the first aid kit atop the refrigerator and pulled it down, taking it to the table.
On my way there, I noticed Jareth was standing again. He had removed the cloth as he stood. The burn had been bigger than I thought, going down almost to where his leggings began. He was now standing to keep the burn from bending, his face twisted in pain.
My heart ached and my stomach twisted nastily at the sight. Determined to set it right, I hurried over to him.
Firmly I set the kit on the table and opened it, rooting around until I found the container of lavender oil.
Jareth's nose twitched as I unscrewed the lid. "Lavender?" He questioned, perplexed.
I nodded, and turned to him with the lavender and a cotton pad in hand. I loaded the cotton pad heavily with oil and spoke at the same time. "It's the best thing I know of for burns." I referred next to the lavender. "It helps immensely with pain and heals quickly." The pad adequately doused, I turned to him and hesitated.
I realized belatedly that I hadn't asked him if I could help-I'd just assumed. I looked up at Jareth. "Is it ok if I-?"
"Yes!" Jareth snapped.
Quickly I began dabbing the lavender oil on his burn.
Jareth sucked in a breath, and his hands grabbed at my elbows suddenly, startling me, making me jump.
I looked up at his face in surprise, only to be sidetracked as I gazed in amazement.
He was entirely himself. The illusion of the movie's Goblin King was gone. Instead, his hair was a dark and warm chestnut color. It sported the same style he'd had it when it was blonde, though the bangs that framed his face were longer. No more mismatched, his warm chocolate brown eyes made my heart feel suddenly warm.
"Gently." He breathed, his face wrinkled in pain.
My face flooded with color. "Oh! Sorry! I think I'm just freaked out." I took a swift breath. "I'll be careful." I reassured him.
Jareth's grip on my arms softened until he released me, while I thought on his true appearance.
Guilt pricked at me as I continued carefully dabbing at the burn. I had been standing there, staring at him while he stood before me, injured. A part of me wondered at my reaction-it always seemed to happen the first instant of each visit, when I'd see how he truly looked. Like my brain had to reboot what I was seeing.
I blinked rapidly and stole a steadying breath, then glanced up to just barely see the golden flecks in his eyes as he gazed at me. His eyes flit down to the lavender pad in my hand. "It has a strong scent."
I followed his gaze, and continued tending to his burn. It was half way covered with the oil by now. "It does. But at least it's pleasant."
Jareth chuckled. "I'm not complaining."
The pendant he wore gleamed faintly in the light from the kitchen window, and it caught my attention briefly before I continued working. "I noticed you always wear your pendant. I assumed it's meant to show your status, but does it have another purpose?"
I felt Jareth's eyes on my face a moment before he spoke. "It is. But it also communicates with your ring, and acts as a charm of illusion."
My brow furrowed. "Illusion?"
He hummed positively before continuing. "Yes. It is meant to make me look human in the instance that I am unable to transform my appearance myself."
Once Jareth's burn was fully and completely covered with lavender oil, I replaced the lid and dropped the used pad in the garbage bin. I held up the lavender bottle. "You should take this home with you when you go, and apply it once a day."
The king offered a grateful nod, then spotted his peach cobbler stained shirt strewn on the ground by the offending dessert. "That's an unfortunate casualty." He observed dryly.
"Sorry again." I apologized, following his gaze. Stepping over to his shirt, I avoided the splatter pattern of cobbler and peach juice on the floor and picked it up. Lifting the shirt, I got a good look at the damage. "Most of it came off. Still…" I wiped off what cobbler remained. "I could clean it in the wash, if you want?" I suggested. "The peach might otherwise stain it."
"Leave it be." Jareth waved his hand dismissively.
I frowned at him. "But it's my fault. I should clean it." I countered.
He studied the shirt a moment more, then shrugged. "If you feel you must. I thank you for it."
In a few moments the washing machine was started, and I shut the folding closet door it and the dryer resided in.
With my back to him, Jareth spoke. "Before, you said you were thinking of impossible things." He prompted me.
My shoulders stiffened. I hadn't anticipated him remembering that-I had forgotten, myself.
Fidgeting with the hem of my shirt, I turned to the living room and deflected his reminder. "It was nothing." I added with a glance at him. "And you need a blanket to wrap up in."
But as I was passing Jareth, he moved suddenly. In a second, he took hold of me by my waist and lifted me up. He did it so quickly that the only reaction I could manage was an alarmed gasp.
My hands flew up to press on his shoulders for balance as I lurched forward. Our faces swayed just centimeters apart, and for an instant my nose brushed lightly against his, making my cheeks flare with heat.
Jareth sat me on the kitchen table before him, the first aid kit and lavender behind me. His hands remained snug on my waist once I was settled, and his elbows rested upon my legs near my knees. He stood between my legs with a frustrated scowl on his face and spoke. "No. Something is wrong and you're keeping it from me." He accused, the very real hurt in his eyes mingling with his frustration.
I was certain my eyes looked bug-like now in their largeness. To distract myself from the truthful accusation, I looked from his eyes down to the pendant against his chest. It shone dully in the kitchen light, not as radiant as it ought to be. Did his pendant reflect his emotions?
I wondered at this until his hands around my waist grew softer and caressed my sides to get my attention. My breath stuttered, and my face reddened terribly. I don't think he realized that it tickled. I reacted automatically, squirming a little and biting back a squeak. My knee lightly twitched against his side, but I was determined not to show that he'd affected me.
I didn't respond otherwise, but gazed mutely forward at his pendant.
He took in a slow breath, and then continued in a gentler tone. "Amelia, I have been honest with you. Trusted you to tell my story."
One of his hands lifted from my waist to tenderly rest upon my cheek. "Now it's time for you to trust me. Why are you so upset?" Jareth's voice was lower, kinder as he searched my face in concern.
I met his eyes, studying them, hoping to convey without words what I wanted. Who, I wanted. Eventually my gaze wandered down to his lips.
His lips parted, and his eyes widened in understanding.
In seeing this, my cheeks flushed and I allowed my gaze to trail lower to stare sadly at his pendant once again. My hands came away from his shoulders to play together between us, and I studied each digit as though it were terribly fascinating. I paused in my study to speak. "I can't say why, because what I want is too much to ask. I'm afraid…"
I stopped in discomfort before building enough courage to go on. "...I'm afraid that whatever I say will negatively affect our relationship, and losing you…" I trailed off, my lip trembling as my emotions boiled higher.
Frustrated with myself, I bit my lip to stop its trembling. Jareth was silent, and I dared not look up to gauge his response. I'd embarrassed myself enough, and seeing his expression might undo whatever resolve I had left to keep my emotions in check.
"That won't happen." Jareth's reassuring, certain voice halted my thoughts. His hand on my cheek shifted down and gently tilted my chin up to meet his eyes, his thumb caressing my chin. In hearing his words, I hesitated before letting my eyes rise to study his serious expression.
His eyes burned with another emotion; one which I was too uncertain to delve deeper into, in case I was wrong. Yet, I felt a glimmer of hope. "You don't know that." I replied.
Frustration returned to his eyes, and Jareth's hand moved with a glide up my face to rest against my cheek once more.
I stared with wide eyes as he leaned forward and his nose brushed mine. "Can we not want the same things?" He murmured, his words emphasized by his warm breath breezing over my lips.
I took in a breath, breathing him in, and Jareth remained silent.
Then ever so gently, his lips brushed mine in a caress, so lightly I almost thought I'd imagined it. My chest felt suddenly warm and light, and the tumultuous emotions within me burst free and were overwhelmed with a sudden, peaceful happiness.
My whole body relaxed as though every worry within me had faded, and my eyes closed with an unrealized tiredness. I leaned into him, returning the kiss, and the burden lifted fully, the floodgates that were entrapping my emotions opened.
I could breathe.
A split second passed, and I wondered if he'd experienced the same feeling. All I knew for sure, was that I wanted to throw my arms around him when I'd felt that wave of emotion-but I restrained myself when a thought occurred to me.
What if he didn't feel the same way?
My stomach sank. But it turned out I needn't have worried. For almost immediately after that first kiss, Jareth's thumb brushed my cheek, and our eyes met as we parted.
His lips came down a second time with more purpose, but no less tender. That same hand he'd placed on my cheek slipped back to tangle in my hair at the base of my head, making my breath catch.
Jareth's free arm moved caressingly around my waist to my back, pulling me closer until I was nearly flush against him. I sucked in a breath as we briefly broke apart, and finally I flung my arms around his neck, pulling him to me as I kissed him, pulling him nearer until we were truly flush together.
Time was irrelevant. Nothing seemed to matter anymore, except for the man in front of me. This, incredible, wonderful man. Once we separated, I pressed my forehead to his while we regained our breath. "I didn't know this is what you wanted." I said, and I straightened, opening my eyes.
"Neither did I." He began with a deep breath, and tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear before he gave a husky chuckle and sobered as he next spoke. "But when you stood to leave, I felt my heart was leaving with you. I feared you leaving." He made a face, and at first I thought it was in disgust. Disgust at me, or at himself, or at the situation, and my heart ached dreadfully.
But then Jareth's eyes met mine with warmth, and I realized his face hadn't been conveying disgust. It had been conveying pain. He was in pain.
My heart ached painfully at the realization, and I moved a hand to his cheek and caressed it, trying to offer comfort. "Jareth..." I murmured, and his gentle gaze lowered back down to my lips and warmed.
My eyes closed when he again leaned down and swept up my lips in a passionate dance. That dance went on for some time, deepening, and my mind exploded with a million feelings. Eventually that dance changed and Jareth wove a feather light trail of kisses down onto my neck that left fire in its wake.
I opened my eyes as my hand on his cheek made its way down and came to rest upon his neck. He shivered at the feeling, and leaned further into me. I felt weak, yet empowered, and for an instant my eyes fluttered, then closed.
But as soon as they did, I remembered something.
Someone.
Andrew.
My eyes snapped open. Every inch of me went cold and I froze, guilt dropping thunderously into my gut. What was I doing? What was I thinking?! I sat up straight, moving my hand on Jareth's neck to his shoulder, while the other took hold of his hand still in my hair. "Jareth." I spoke, and he must have sensed the change in me.
Pressing one last, achingly loving kiss to my collar bone where he'd stopped, he lifted his head and gave me a perplexed look. I was silent for a moment, just processing my emotions and hating the words I knew I'd have to say to him. I shook my head. "We can't do this."
Jareth's questioning expression prevailed as he frowned. "Any particular reason?"
I grimaced. Not wanting to see the hurt in his eyes, I glanced away a moment to gather my courage before facing him fully. "Andrew."
At the mention of my boyfriend's name, Jareth's arm around my waist tightened protectively. His lips curved further down into a scowl, his tone dangerous. "...And?"
I made a face. "And this is wrong. I can't be with you when I'm dating Andrew. It's not right." Guilt tugged at my stomach again even as I spoke the words. "I'm sorry."
Jareth's arm loosened from around my waist and came away entirely, and he took one stiff, full step back, his arms at his sides as he frowned at me. There was hurt and anger, and confusion in his gaze.
The guilt I'd felt before about Andrew was dwarfed by the guilt I felt in seeing Jareth's expression, and realizing just how stupid I had been in all of this. I should have broken up with Andrew sooner-then this wouldn't be an issue. We could be happy. But my clueless, uncertain nature, over complicated something that should have been simple.
I'd ruined something, before it had even the chance to begin.
I wanted to break up with Andrew, I needed to do it. And more than anything I needed Jareth to know without an ounce of uncertainty, that I loved him.
I felt the guilt lifting a little in coming to my decision, but before I could tell him my thoughts, a cold breeze swept through the kitchen, stopping me.
"What-in hell is going on here?!" Andrew's voice, oddly shrill and certainly furious, boomed from the living room. The sudden noise made me jump, and Jareth whirled to face my boyfriend, putting himself partially in front of me at the perceived threat.
"Andrew!" I half reproved him, my heart thumping rapidly at the scare. Jareth grimaced in pain from the sharp movement when he'd turned to put himself between me and Andrew.
Realizing I was still attop the table, I moved carefully down and fully faced my boyfriend.
"You're frightening her." Jareth's words were heavy with warning, threatening Andrew's forceful removal if needed.
Andrew glowered at Jareth, his eyes flashing with incredulous fury. "She wouldn't be scared at all-if she hadn't just been feeling you up!"
My face turned scarlet, and my earlier guilt about Andrew returned full force at his reaction.
Until I realized something.
Andrew had never actually seen me touch Jareth-in truth, he had no idea what was happening here-which meant he would have reacted this same way, even if I hadn't kissed Jareth. If nothing at all had truly happened, Andrew would have behaved the same.
My guilt lifted considerably as foreboding turned my stomach. No matter the circumstances, would his reactions always be like this?
Was this what living with Andrew would be like?
I felt the blood draining from my cheeks.
If that was the case-if marriage to Andrew meant more of these reactions to misunderstandings-then I definitely did not want to marry him.
Andrew demanded. "What is he doing here?"
"Jareth asked for my help in writing a book." I explained, my rude awakening to a future Andrew, and my decision to break up with him, had helped steady me.
Andrew looked Jareth's toned-and currently red-torso over with contempt. "And he needs to be half-naked for that? What kind of book are you two writing?"
I frowned, then shook my head side to side in exasperation. "I was making a cobbler, and accidentally ran into him with it, and it spilled on his shirt." I gestured at the closet where the washer was rumbling. "It's in the wash."
I pointed out Jareth's blotchy red burn. "It would be a bad idea for him to put anything on right now, anyway. It'd trap the heat in and make the burn worse."
Andrew's face gained a darker color and he marched toward me and Jareth with a furious growl. "I don't care if it gets worse-what I care about is that he gets out!"
I gaped at Andrew. He really didn't care that someone was hurt?
Jareth frowned at the both of us. "If my presence is causing you distress, I will leave..." Jareth suggested, but I saw the look in his eyes. It was a look that said he would be fine with Andrew being the one who left. Jareth didn't actually want to leave-and likely wouldn't-not with how Andrew was behaving. Even so, he was giving me the choice.
Seeing his expression, I understood, and his reassuring presence gave me immense comfort.
At Jareth's words, however, Andrew spoke in an angry rush. "Yes. Get out."
My head snapped round to Andrew and I shot him an angry, reproving frown, before I faced Jareth again. My expression eased, but I shook my head negatively at the goblin king and spoke with an authoritative firmness. "No. You're staying. Lavender oil is the best thing for you right now. You need to stay put to let it do its work on that burn."
I seemed to have surprised him a little, for his eyebrows went up briefly, before they fell again and he smiled slightly. There was a look of pride at me standing up for myself, as well as something else in his eyes, that made my heart feel suddenly warm.
Andrew took a few steps further into the kitchen, nearer to me. The ring on my finger grew warm the closer Andrew got, and I folded my arms to hide the ring behind my right arm.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jareth notice my defensive posture, and he moved closer to me. I could feel the warmth coming from his arm when it spanned the short distance between us to brush mine.
I spoke quickly to quell Andrew's anger. "You really don't care that an injured man could get worse?"
Andrew scowled, stopping before me. "That's not my concern!" Andrew stabbed a finger at Jareth. "My concern is that there's a man standing shirtless in your home!"
I glared back. "I already explained the situation. I was going to have him wrap himself up in a blanket-I can't believe you'd think I'd allow him to go around half naked!" I raised my eyebrows in disbelief at Andrew.
Andrew's expression darkened further and the ring grew warmer still.
I winced and moved it away from my arm.
Andrew spoke through his teeth. "Whatever. He can go to an urgent care. You don't have to treat him."
My tone took on an almost teacher quality, impatience lacing it. I was getting tired of Andrew's bullheadedness. "It's already done." With that reminder, I turned to close the first aid kit, getting it ready to put it back on top of the fridge.
But Andrew moved, quicker than I'd ever seen him move, as he reached out and took hold of my hand.
I froze, and out of Andrew's line of sight, I saw Jareth's hair bristle and his eyes widen and then narrow in his outrage at Andrew.
'Remove yourself, or I will!' Plain as day, it was almost as if Jareth had spoken the words.
My eyes widened at him, then dropped to his pendant. But my gaze was pulled back to Andrew as he interrupted. "Amelia-don't do this. Just send him away."
Pursing my lips, I tried to pull my hand free of his to no avail. "I can handle myself."
He made a face, though his grip on my hand had eased. "It's not you I'm worried about." He groused, with a pointed look at Jareth.
The goblin king came to his full height. "She has nothing to fear from me. I will not harm her." The way Jareth said it, he made it sound like Andrew would.
It was a concern I had not considered a possibility until today.
Andrew looked about to say something, and I cleared my throat loudly to stop any further argument.
Taking my hand back from him, I shut and picked up the first aid kit from off of the table. Moving to the refrigerator, I set it on top and spoke to Andrew as I returned. "I'm not sending him away."
Andrew fell utterly silent, his lips twisting in anger. "Fine." He took a quick breath, and glared hard at me. "In that case, I think we need a break." That said, he glanced between me and Jareth, then turned and left the house. He got as far as the sidewalk when I broke free from my stupor.
"Break!" I bristled, and marched after Andrew with thunderous frustration.
At the door I called to him, that frustration lacing my tone. "Andrew!" He slowed to a stop, and grudgingly turned to face me as I moved to catch up with him.
"What?" He waspishly snapped.
I stopped short, taking in his tone. It brought again to the forefront of my mind, the earlier revelation of a future Andrew. "I wasn't cheating on you. But you are right about something." I added, and Andrew's bewildered expression answered me. I went on. "We do need a break. But I want a permanent one. I can't marry you."
Andrew's face reddened furiously. "You're-You're serious?" He hissed.
I nodded firmly. "Yes. I'm sorry."
Silence prevailed as Andrew stared at me for a moment, and the very air around us seemed to grow colder.
He took a step forward, toward me, and a horrible, dark feeling hit me. "I see." His voice fell.
He took another step. "How unfortunate." It was only a murmur, but there seemed a terrible threat in it, and suddenly the 'no feeling' was coming off of Andrew as though he had bathed in it.
I went cold with fear, and instinctively moved backwards, repelled by the feeling.
The look he gave me-it was as though he were considering something.
Something terrible.
I was wishing I hadn't pursued him. But if I hadn't, I might not have seen this side of him. Regardless, I still wished very much for the comfort of my home and Jareth's reassuring presence.
The dark eyes staring me down noticed the direction I was headed, and they flit up to the kitchen window. Andrew straightened slowly, his expression carefully turning neutral. "I...understand." His eyes landed once more on me, and immediately I took another two, careful, steps backwards.
"Goodbye, Amelia." Andrew gave me one last hard look, then turned and strode to his car.
I retreated up my stairs with my eyes on him as he entered his vehicle, and drove out of sight, and I then went back inside.
Closing and locking the door, I felt the warmth of the house embracing me, and exhaled a breath I didn't realize I'd been holding.
I turned back and started toward the kitchen, back toward Jareth. "I'm sorry…" I trailed off as the kitchen came into full view.
Jareth was gone.
I cast my gaze around, and noticed the laundry closet was slightly opened. My heart gave a sharp twinge as I opened it fully.
The washer was stopped, and Jareth's shirt was gone.
Had he left, thinking I had chosen Andrew?
I felt sick at the thought.
I recalled the ring in that moment, and hope returned to my heart. Lifting my hand, I lowered my gaze to it, and it flickered inquisitively back at me. My heart thumped in a war of hope and anguish. "Can you-Can you ask Jareth to come here, please? I need to apologize-I need to tell him something important."
The ring acknowledged my request, and its light faded.
I didn't move from where I stood as I waited.
The hope I had felt before, began little by little to shrink away, the longer I waited for him. At length it was an answer, and not Jareth, that came.
The ring's light shone in such a way that it seemed wary. It gave an answer to my request.
Jareth wasn't coming.
I blinked, and tears stumbled down my cheeks. Surprised by them, I sat up a little straighter and the tears tumbled from my face to the floor as I reached up to touch my face. I stared down at the twin droplets in stunned silence.
I did make a mistake. I should have broken up with Andrew long ago. I shouldn't have rejected Jareth.
I loved him.
I had for some time; and every moment I spent with him, made it clearer and clearer for me now that I had never really loved Andrew-I had only been settling for him.
Whenever Andrew spoke of a future for us, I couldn't imagine it. I realized now that a part of me didn't want to imagine it. I didn't want to imagine a life with Andrew; because I didn't want to marry him. I couldn't.
The ring seemed to have nothing more to convey, and its light dimmed to a faint glimmer.
My chest felt hollow.
New tears began to form, my throat constricting, and I quickly cleared my throat, pushing the palm of my hand against my chest briefly and taking a steady breath.
Still absently rubbing the spot, I made my way to the cobbler mess on the floor, picking up a dish rag and the garbage can as my earlier tears began to make their way down my face in earnest.
It was my fault-all of it. I had been so blind.
Worse than anything, I had hurt Jareth.
I knelt down numbly before the mess, and started at the outside edges, working my way to the center. It soon began to be too hot to handle, and I quickly retracted my hand, setting the rag down beside it and sitting clumsily back against the counter.
Jareth and I could have had a chance-but now?
It was all ruined.
The pain in my chest increased.
Pulling my knees up, I folded my arms over them and put my head down to let my tears fall, when a dreadful thought came to mind.
A single, heartbreaking thought.
'Jareth will never come back.'
A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please read and review!