Alyssae didn't search for the dwarf immediately, but first bound the belt around her waist so she could hang her sword. She didn't want to be threatened by him again.
It took no trouble to find the dwarf king. He still sat on the same rock and looked the other way. Alyssae wondered where he was thinking of. He only had to speak one word to see her leave and it was a miracle he hadn't done it. It gave her a little hope.
She walked towards him, but because of her soft footsteps he only noticed her when she stood next to him. He froze when he saw her and the shock was reflected in his eyes.
'I am sorry, okay?' she started before he could say a thing. 'I shouldn't have said that you're arrogant.'
Thorin sniffed and turned his face away, but he stayed at least.
'But you think I am,' he concluded, barely intelligible.
Alyssae picked her hair. 'There's no point in lying, hmm?'
There was a short silence, but she had the feeling it was up to her to break it. 'I had no idea you were the heir of Thrór or that it was your responsibility to reunite your people in the city that is taken away from you.'
She waited for his reaction, but it looked like he hadn't heard her words. He kept staring in the distance, his shoulders hanging, like the burden he was carrying became to heavy.
She wished he said something. Thank her for her fair words or even apologize for the fact he pushed her to the wall with his sword.
'Will you send me away?'
She couldn't take his silence any longer. She wanted to hear his voice – no matter what he would say.
Carefully he looked at her and Alyssae forced herself not to look down. When he stared at his hands again, she realized he didn't know what to do with her either.
She intertwined her fingers, afraid to pull out his hair when she did not. His silence was nerve-racking.
She resisted the tendency to stand up and cleared her throat. 'You hate me, don't you?'
It was just a whisper which left her mouth. It wasn't a real question, rather an observation.
'No,' he answered on the contrary. 'I don't hate you. You think you would still be alive?'
Alyssae got the feeling the ice cube in her stomach lost its volume spontaneously, but the moment their eyes met Thorin turned his face away again.
'I want to help you. I really do.'
She wanted to put the ring on her finger to prove her use, but she could resist the desire. He could take the jewel away from her to use it by himself. After all Thrór had been a greedy king and the same blood flew through his veins – whether he liked it or not.
'The question is why. I can't trust you. I just can't.'
'You neither give me the chance,' Alyssae answered. 'Trust needs to grow, but you have to open up.'
'And I'm not able to do so. Elves disappointed my people for a century. None of Thranduil's kin came to help us when our city was burning, nor did they shelter them when they roamed across the fields.'
On his face she could see the memories still hurt him. She looked at his hand, which rested next to her's on the rock. She broke through her own safe world and laid her fingers on his.
'But I am not from Mirkwood. Not all elves are the same. I'd like to solve the mistakes of my people –as far as that's possible. I bet you don't believe me when I say some of you stole my heart. Kili, Fili and Bofur… I consider them as friends.'
Deep inside she knew she had enclosed Thorin in her heart too. The fear that he hated her, was much deeper than just the fact that he would take away an adventure.
She saw Kili and Ori coming outside and realized her fingers were still lying on his hand. Quickly she let go of him and she saw the dwarf king looked embarrassed the other way as well.
'I – sorry,' she murmured. 'Do you come with me to eat? Some of your friends definitely went on a hunger strike till you come back.'
She smiled hasty to show it was a joke. To her relief she saw he rose from his seat. They went back inside without saying anything to each other, where after they took the empty places of Ori and Kili. She caught Balin's smile and noticed her appetite still seemed miles away. She stared at her hand, not able to understand that she had showed such a sign of affection. Still she dared to suppose he silently agreed with her membership of the fellowship. For now.