Howdy, folks! Guess how MY first week of school went? It was alright. I didn't steal anyone's lunch money or anything, nor did anyone pick on me…except for my friend, but that's just our way of bonding. (Us tossing little comments at each other.) I have a Math class with a friend of mine from high school, and I met a friend from high school there that I hadn't seen in forever. He's apparently getting a degree in forensic psychology or something like that. I remember it was a lot of fun in world history with him and lunch, and we made jokes with each other. He was my "lesbian lover". Ha ha. It was pretty great. Since I'm terrible at getting to know people, I remember I had a rather horrific experience where I walked up right next to this group of people I was interested in befriending and said, "I'm not a stalker or anything" and sat down right next to them, completely silent the rest of the time. They…of course, wound up leaving right around the same time I had to leave, so I wound up following them out the building. It was so terrible. They definitely thought I was a stalker then…
Well…about those guys… With Beth there to ease my habit of closing myself off around a big group of people, I actually wound up getting to know two of the guys from that group! (I even let one of them borrow Another Note: BB Serial Murder Case, the Death Note spin-off novel.) Huzzah! It was so great.
And now I get to hang out with Mu all day, one of my friends from high school as well. She has a taser, apparently. And she made sure it was on right before she grabbed me in a big hug. Not…not too pleasant… It wasn't the most comforting hug I'd ever received… (It was just to scare me. She never unleashed it on me or anything.) She loves to scare people. She drove me home the other day and ALWAYS lurched to a stop and drove twelve miles over the speed limit, blasting music from the car. At one point she ran right into the lane of some guy, not even stopping, asking, "Are we gonna make it? We gonna make it?" and then she turned into another lane at the last second and stopped in front of the car two cars down in the next lane. I said, "Guess we couldn't." and she said, "Yeah. We should be dead." By the time I got home, Finger Eleven's Paralyzer was playing. At volume 24…right in front of my house…with my neighbors watching. She's a scream. And I do mean that in every sense of the term.
I'd like to at least make one friend that doesn't spout video games all the time. Mu is one of those people, but, as you probably guessed, it's sort of scary to be around her sometimes. (Not that I really care. It was fun, despite the fact that I screamed at least three times.) Hmmm…Beth and Brett talk to me about video games. The guy I loaned Another Note out to also kept talking about video games to me assuming I had any idea about them. Geez. I'd like to get to know someone who isn't a gamer for once… Speaking of gamer… I need to make sure I mention Kidoumaru as a gamer at least once in this story before this arc is over… But I keep mentioning the spiders. Damn it. I'll make Kiba go over to his place or something… Hmm… Damn. How am I going to fit that in there with all I've got planned?
My Creative Writing class sounds like the most fun and nerve-wracking at the same time. We had to introduce ourselves…and I got so freaked out because we had to give a lie and a truth…so I mentioned my cat had licked off all her lower body hair versus I'd swallowed a bee. ): I got so freaked I slipped up and made it sound like it was twice as bad as it actually was–she's actually only licked all of the fur off of her belly. Jeez. And I was six minutes late to my Drawing class… And I nearly fell asleep in Government both classes; not just the introduction day which is usually the one expected to be boring. (Of course, I hadn't slept the previous night.) Math seems like the only one that will be relatively bearable. I feel more productive in that class than I felt in the last one. (The one I failed so I had to take it again.) This new school year looks full of promise and failure all at once. Ugh. Wish me luck… o.o;
ABOUT THE CHAPTER NOW:
This chapter's more…happy. (Probably because it's around that time for Kiba to start laughing and the fact that I'm in such a good mood over my new year of school. I love to learn so much.) And wow…I likes me some Shino getting all jealous and talking bug. (And Kidoumaru talking spider? Tasty.) Mmmm. Sexy. Just like when he was trying to sweet-talk TenTen. Oh yeah. Shino knows how to talk to the ladies… (He's such a freakin' nerd.) I'd take bug over dirty any day.
He's only going by what his father taught him, though.
Shibi: Yeah, girl. You've got the cutest outer shell. Let's see your plump insides!
Girl: PLUMP? What the hell. GET OFF.
Jesus, Shibi. Never use the word plump around a girl. You could've gone with silky or wet. Wet probably would've been a sexier use of words…considering what you were about to do.
Anyway, I reached a stump in Shino's character so I decided to look up his birthday and sign to get a better idea of it. He's an Aquarius. His character in this story actually sorta matches what an Aquarius is described like. Mind, Aquarius are fun-loving creatures that thrive on freedom and spontaneity and never really get emotionally attached to things. I mean, they do, but they are slightly detached at the same time.
Doesn't sound like a match the emotionally-driven Cancer (Kiba), right? So…I decided to see if they are compatible. Here's what I got in return: (UGH.)
"Fun-loving Aquarius will be too unpredictable for a vulnerable Cancer. The Cancer is usually more open and steady than Aquarius, who is inclined to find new adventures. Aquarians love to share their life stories with the world while Cancer is satisfied to concentrate on personal obligations. Cancer have a conservative taste; Aquarius taste are usually the opposite. The Cancer's needs can't remain unsatisfied. Aquarius tends to exempt him/herself from the emotional requirements. They are able to find common language in the bedroom for some time, though they will not sustain this partnership in a drawing room for a long time. The eccentricity of Uranus does not go well with the moods of Luna. Odds against this combination are too great for this combination, unless one will become subservient to the other."
The first thing I thought after reading was, '…Shit. It can't work.' And then I realized…I'm the fucking author! I don't have to listen to this bullshit; I can make it work without breaching their characters! So. I made Shino's parents share that type of unsteady relationship. Hence, what you get in this chapter when Shino asks about his mother. What Shino's father relays to Shino is also very helpful in giving the bug-nin material on what not to do if he wants to make a relationship with Kiba work.
(Wouldn't I be cruel if I decided to make the relationship work in this story and then have it fall to pieces in one of the sequels? The thought is very, very amusing. But I'm not that cruel.)
I am cruel for giving you such a long-ass A/N, though. (Especially since most of it isn't even about the story.)
Enjoy the chapter. I hope it's satisfactory. I spoil you all too much. (You like me spoiling you all. Don't deny it…) I'm upset with this chapter, though. It feels more disjointed than the rest… Hmmm… It's because I use too much introspection in this rather than action, I think…
Must Love Dogs
Scene 25
Shino walked out of his room sometime around nine, which was amazing, considering the fact that he hadn't wanted to wake up from that dream at all. Being here was making him remember back when he was a kid, when he actually used to sleep. Come to think of it, he was sleeping more often, wasn't he? As he walked toward the kitchen, he spied the back of Kiba. He was really only wearing boxers and a white wife-beater, but…
Well, damn. Kiba had nice shoulders. Nice and tan; shit, not even TenTen looked that good half-naked, and she was pretty muscular for a girl…
As he stared, he continued to walk, eyes grazing over a cluster of scars over Kiba's shoulders. His eyebrows furrowed, and his mind started to wander. Ukon had said something about Sakon leaving scars. Well…were those the scars? His eyes drifted down, back to Kiba's chest and lower, down to his abs–yikes, he could see them through that wife-beater–, lower, down to his–
Clunk!
He walked head-first into the china cabinet. There was a massive shudder from the blasted object, and he doubled backward. All eyes immediately turned to Shino, where he was rubbing his head and taking a few baby steps backward.
Hana immediately went to the cabinet, steadying it. "Jesus, Shino! What the hell?? You're going to break something in here!" She grazed over the contents, glad to see that nothing had broken. "What were you thinking!?"
Shino rubbed at his temple, wincing slightly and looking over at Kiba. Kiba was staring at him, face completely blank. He forced a smile onto his face and dropped his hand. "Well, I was just…er…" His cheeks went red. "Wh…Where did you get those scars on your shoulder, Kiba?"
Kiba turned that same awkward shade of red as Shino and looked down at his shoulder, pulling at the wife-beater to cover it as best as he could. "Um…that…'s nothing. It's nothing…" The second he released the strap, it went right back towards his shoulder, leaving the scars uncovered futilely.
Hana nodded her head in his direction. "Wild sex, he says."
Kiba went red, turning and glaring at her. "S-Sis! I only told you because you saw–" He cut himself off, returning to his bowl of Cookie Crisps and turning an awkward shade of purple. "It's nothing."
Shino rubbed his head a little. "I figured. Ukon told me Sakon probably screwed you over and left scars…" Inside, he was starting to steam. 'Bastard,' he thought. 'I'll kill him… Hurting my K–no…friend…' He went and took a spot next to Juugo, glancing over to see the man looking a wreck. He leaned toward him.
"Hey, Juugo, you okay?"
Juugo turned and looked at him, and it was apparent he hadn't gotten any sleep the night before because of his bloodshot eyes. He stared at Shino for the longest moment before he glanced over at Kiba, then at Hana, and finally back toward his pancakes. "…'S nothing… Just…uh…her test the other day didn't go as planned…" His voice barely whispered, so Kiba didn't hear it.
Shino stared at him, his voice lowering to a whisper as well. "What do you mean? She's sick?"
"Er…no. She's not. Like I said, it's nothing…" He turned back, stuffing his face with pancakes. After a while, he slammed his fork down on the table and stood, immediately going to the backyard. "…Um…I'm going to go walk the dogs…H…Kiba. I'll be back around eleven."
Shino frowned, and Kiba shot him a dirty look, like he couldn't believe he'd just told him instead of his sister. The man frowning tried to convince Juugo he could do it. "Hey, that's my job. You don't have to, Juugo. Here, let me go walk…them…"
The look on Juugo's face clearly said he needed to get out of the house, and Shino trailed off as the orange-haired giant glared at him. As the man left, Hana grabbed his plate and started eating the remaining pancakes off of it. She gave Shino a bright smile and took a bite, sighing happily. Shino just stared at her. "So…what's with Juugo…?"
"He'll get over it. He's just…unsure of what to do right now."
"Do what? Does he have to do anything?"
"Well, obviously, since he's engaged to me."
Shino just stared at her even more, and she burst out laughing like there was some big inside joke that he wasn't a part of. Kiba looked over at her, the colour slowly draining out of his face. He shook his head, shoving the bowl of cereal away from him, chunking the spoon across the room. Amazingly, it bounced off the wall and landed in the sink, and Kiba stood, his voice clearly showing he was immensely upset about the whole subject.
"When was your first time with Juugo?"
"Nearly five weeks ago. The Friday before our first date. I'm surprised no one saw us in the mail room…although it was right before closing time… Anyway, you have to remember there was an attraction since he remembered me from two years ago as the woman who tried to put him behind bars. So…before our first date isn't really that hard to understand. He'd been thinking about me for about a year, when he realized he was thankful for me prosecuting against him in a therapy session. When he told me that…I just…couldn't even help myself. It was just so sweet in an odd way. He even–"
"Unbelieveable! Un-fucking-believeable, Hana! Getting knocked up your first time just like Mom! And before you even officially dated!? Even I have better sense not to give it away before anything serious!" He steamed, growling and leaving through the back door, just like Juugo had done before. He slammed the door behind him, not even caring about the dangers of Akamaru breaking it down anymore.
Shino turned and looked at her. "Isn't almost five weeks a little…er…early to confirm anything?"
"Not really. The earliest you can actually confirm a pregnancy is at two weeks, but I doubt it'd happen that early unless you were actually trying to conceive and checked fervently. I'm a month pregnant, and I didn't even have morning sickness, so I had no idea. When they tested me, they saw my uterus was really wide for a normal woman and figured something was up. I didn't think something was weird when they wanted to test my blood immediately after, but I had no idea they were testing my blood for that… As it turns out, my uterus had expanded and my blood contained the hormone pregnant women release when the egg attaches itself to the wall of, well…you know. We didn't really have a condom with us when we had sex that one Friday…so…that's got to be when it happened…"
She stared at the back door for a while, her eyes softening a little sadly. "But I just told Juugo after Kiba came home last night. …G…Give him some time to think about it and he'll be happy… He's just anxious because Suigetsu's a bit possessive of his friends and that man already has something against Kiba, apparently. Well…" She rolled her eyes. "Of course, he's also anxious for the baby…but…I welcome it with open arms. Reminds me of how I was conceived, except me and Juugo were sober… You can bet your ass I'm going to give the baby more of my love than my mother gave me when I was at that age…"
She smiled, looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully. "…Hmmm…I wonder if it'll have Juugo's hair… I hope it does. I got tired of staring at family photos filled with brown hair years ago…"
Shino just stared at her, unable to say anything. Was he supposed to say congratulations in a situation like this? What? She turned and looked at him, stuffing more pancakes into her mouth. "Well, the only problem we have now is we're going to need a place to live. There's no way in hell I'm raising my child in that suite of mine, or anywhere near where Juugo lives. I lived in that city the first six years of my life. I know how hard it is for a kid not having much growing up or living in a cramped apartment. Maybe we can move to the suburbs… That'd be great, wouldn't it?"
Shino stared at her for the longest time before he closed his eyes, trying to picture it. Somewhere with a big backyard, enough room for the triplets and Kuromaru, enough space in the house for a child. He let that thought overtake his mind for a few moments, until he realized that'd be a wonderful idea. Settling down, having a bunch of kids and raising them in the suburbs… He opened his eyes, surprised to see she was smiling and staring straight at him. She leaned her cheek into her hand, giggling.
"That must've been a happy daydream… You've got a great big smile on your face…"
Shino looked down at the table bashfully. "Yeah…well…it seems nice. I think Juugo would enjoy getting away from the city…"
"I think he would, too… He hasn't had a single nightmare since he came here. Did you know that before, when he lived in the city, he had to take an hour long route to work in order to avoid the police station and a few other streets he had bad memories from as opposed to an even simpler twenty minute route? He was a mess. Since he came here, he's been a complete lamb. Being out of the city has had a great effect on him…"
"Yes…but…seeing all of his problems like that… Don't you think having a kid this early on is going to be too much for him? What if he gets worse? You'll have to start the psychotherapy all over again…"
She smiled, eating the last bite of pancakes and taking it to the sink. "…No. I'm sure he's most upset over this because he's afraid of what kind of father he'd make… He may take a bit longer than most people to adapt to big changes like this…but I think in the end, this baby will bring out the best in him…" She turned around, leaning on the sink. "I think a baby is the best thing to heal him, Shino. And if not–" She put a hand to her stomach, nodding her head confidently. "–then both of us will heal him."
Shino finally smiled. "Congratulations, Hana."
She walked over, kissing the top of his head. "Thank you, Shino. Now go take a shower so you'll smell good for this barbeque dinner. Fridays were always barbeque night for us–our family, that is. I really think this dinner will be the turning point for my brother."
Shino nodded and grabbed some clothes to change into after the shower. The entire time he was in there, washing himself, he couldn't help but wonder–where the hell had Kiba gone in his lack of clothes?
Lack of clothes… Hmmm… His mind started to wander, and he didn't really have it in him to scold himself for thinking such dirty thoughts.
–––––––––––––––––––
He stepped out of the bathroom, drying off his hair as best as he could and mentally tallying again. Eight.
He walked out into the hallway, surprised to see someone through the window. Kiba's door was open, and there was a glimpse of–
He walked into Kiba's room, knocking on the window, slightly amused. The man turned around, glaring at him. Shino smiled. "Done with your tantrum? You can't change the fact that she's pregnant, you know… You might as well accept it. Just think about it…a new niece or nephew to add to your family. Hell, what if it's twins? Wouldn't that be great? Then you'd have five in your family instead of four."
Kiba's eyes hardened, and he pointed his finger at the glass. "I'm…I'm only getting mad for my parents's sake. Mom would be pissed at Hana for doing the same thing she did, and Dad would be pissed at her for getting pregnant out of wedlock."
"Still…does that justify giving the people who live behind you a picture for their pin-up calendar?" He slid the window open, grabbing Kiba's shirt and pulling the brunette toward him. "I'm sure someone appreciates you parading around in your underwear, but the people who live behind you probably don't…"
Kiba raised his eyebrows at him, looking down at himself. "What?" He looked back up at Shino, pursing his lips together angrily, his eyes showing something slightly amused swirling around in them. "You think I'm still wearing my boxers? Well, then you're going to be sorely disappointed…"
Shino sighed, rolling his eyes a little. "Kiba…don't be like this. I'm sure it must be hard for you. But…where one life ends, another must begin. Don't look at this so badly…"
Kiba reached his hand in the window, fisting Shino's shorts and yanking them down. "I'll give you something bad to look at! Take a gander at those legs, Shino! Do the words 'tanning booth' mean anything to you??" He snorted, looking away. "Ever hear of the words 'leg wax'?"
"Men have hair on their legs, alright?? Real men don't wax!" He pulled his shorts back up, glaring a little… "But I'm sure you know all about that." …He grabbed Kiba's arm and yanked him inside the room, knocking the box of CD's to the ground and everything near the window sill. Kiba let out a loud yelp, falling onto the ground on his back.
Shino grabbed one of his ankles and waved it around, pointing at all of the brown hairs dotting his legs, though they were a lot shorter than his own–they almost looked like they were growing back after a shave or something…or, like he'd mentioned earlier, a leg wax. "Oh, wow! And apparently you're a real man, too… Look at that. Who would've thought?"
Kiba kicked his ankle out of Shino's grip, taking Shino's jest personally. He pouted, jumping to his feet. "Yeah, I'm a real man! I'm also damn good-looking, too!" He rubbed his hand down his legs a bit more seductively than he would've chosen for the situation, a spark of something Shino couldn't see because he was too busy staring at those legs filling his eyes. "See these legs? They're my second biggest asset besides my–"
"Abs?"
Kiba glared at him, lifting his wife-beater and looking at his abs a little. He hadn't hit the gym in ages. What the hell? His abs could've stood for some tweaking to make them really something to look at. Not that…wait, had Shino just suggested his abs were his biggest asset!? He turned to stare at Shino, starting to stutter.
"I…uh…I meant…my…my ass, actually… But…uh…" He went red, shifting from foot to foot bashfully. "I guess…my abs are good, too…"
He left the room abruptly. Shino just stared at him, grabbing a quick look of Kiba's biggest asset. Not too big or too small… He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. That was good, too… Wait…what was he thinking?? He'd even jacked off to Kiba in the shower, too!
He turned to stare at the CD's on the ground, still a bit upset by how difficult Kiba was. When he'd met him what felt like ages ago, he'd really not…counted on him being so difficult like this. Kiba was moody and vulnerable and ever-the-child throwing tantrums whenever he could. He was pretty sure he was only this acting this bad because of the loss of his mother…but how long would it take for him to recover…? The way he was acting, it seemed like it would take a lot. Still…he'd had to have said something that set Kiba off. What was it? His eyes glazed over, and he stared at the CD he'd picked up, not really looking at it but, rather, past it.
He was lost in his own little world for a moment, until finally he snapped out of it and focused on the CD in his hand. His eyes scanned over it, never seeing one like that before in the box. He spun around the room a few times, trying to figure out where it had come from. Apparently…
He bent down, staring at the small shelf under the window, beside the dresser. There was a little case opened up right beside it, like it had fallen out. He looked at all the books–lots of books about dogs and a few comic books, numerous amounts of books from childhood Kiba had never thrown out. He spied one, The Runaway Bunny, and picked it up.
Another CD case fell out…the CD unmarked like the one he'd found on the floor.
Hmmm…curiouser and curiouser…
Shino picked up the one that had fallen out of the book, noticing a number on the front of the case. He picked up the one on the floor and deposited the CD back into it, flipping it closed and staring at the number.
One.
The one he'd found in The Runaway Bunny was numbered three.
He grabbed the CD player off the ground by Kiba's bed, grabbing "1" and sticking it in there. He put the headphones over his ears, pressing play.
The first thing he heard was the barking. In the background a steady barking pounded like a heartbeat, constant and ever-present, no matter how faint. The second thing he heard was a bird, loud and chortling away on a tree somewhere. The quality was bad, but still he could hear what was going on. The third thing that reached his ears was the shuffling of grass beneath someone's feet.
Finally, a woman started to speak. Her voice held that same gruff, yet feminine, tone Hana's did, though it was a bit deeper than Kiba's sister.
"I was diagnosed with cancer the other day. They say I've got until mid-August if my health stays the same right now and I make sure to eat a little healthier. At first I wanted to call you and tell you and your sister, but…you quit your job when Dad died, Kiba, and still haven't gotten a new one yet… It's been a month and a half, boy. I want you to get a job, so I need you staying right where you are. You need to grow up, that's why your father sent you out of the house in the first place. So…I decided I'd make an exercise for you to help you get over this, if and when you discover I'm dead and come down here to grieve… I'm happy with the life I lived; if your father were still alive I would've probably dealt with this badly, but…right now the only thing I regret is leaving you and your sister behind… You hear these dogs in the background? I've been selling these things off, and I'm preparing for you coming down for Easter…but I know that by the time you ever hear this–if you ever hear this; I'm planning on setting this on the top of your dresser some time in June–the dogs won't be there anymore and it'll be even harder for you to deal with it. This idea I have…this exercise…it's like a scavenger hunt. By the end of this…I want you to deal with this appropriately and find your way back to where you belong."
There was a short pause, and that faint sound of dogs got a little louder, and louder…and louder still. Finally, it resounded clearly in the microphone, and he heard the whining of one of the dogs, jumping at some metal fence of some sort. She did something, and the dog started to bark.
"This is your first clue, Kiba. Can you guess where the next clue is? There's one clue for each major event in your life that I was a part of. At least, the ones I enjoyed the most… You can figure out this puzzle. I know you can. It's all a matter of following the clues to the prize at the end, my little pup. I hope you hear my voice again soon. Good luck."
The CD wrenched to a halt in the player, and Shino took the headphones off his ear. He sat up, feeling a whole swirl of emotions he couldn't really put his finger on. Not that it was important. Kiba hadn't known about any of this. What… When would be the best time to tell him? Sure, it would be best to say it as quick as possible, but there was a while left before he had to leave. He could show this to Kiba on Saturday. It would certainly keep him busy, wouldn't it?
He put the CD case labeled "3" back into the book and put that back in the bookshelf. Kiba's mother sure was something, coming up with a scavenger hunt like that… He stowed the CD back into its case and put everything back where they were supposed to go. Then, he took the CD case–the first one he'd found, "1"–and placed it underneath his pillow in the guest room.
Hana came in the room. She smiled. "Shino…Juugo's not back yet, but could you start on the barbeque? I laid everything out for you, even the sauce and the meat. All you have to do is cook it. I'm going to be making coleslaw and lemonade… Maybe some egg salad sandwiches for Juugo, in case he's too upset to eat chicken."
Shino nodded his head. "Ever make a broccoli-spinach dip?"
She stared at him, that smile slowly growing larger. "No. I have not… You think we should have chips with this meal? That seems more like an appetizer, don't you think?"
He shrugged, walking out of the room and into the kitchen. "It's really good. I'm sure Juugo would really like it. Just take sour cream and spinach and broccoli and mix it together. Oh, and maybe even a touch of cream cheese. But not too much; that might clash with the sour cream…" He walked out to the grill, staring at the meat and the sauces all set out for him.
He smiled brightly. He hadn't done this in quite some time… This was going to be quite refreshing.
–––––––––––––––––––
Kiba picked at the fraying in his jeans. He couldn't remember the last time he'd worn these jeans… Oh wait…he'd been wearing them the day he met Shino. Of course, that was before they got snagged on that bush Akamaru ran by and wound up getting a large rip in the knees immediately after he'd run off from Shino…
He leaned forward in the chair set up near the house, in the front yard, and he stared down at his abs, glaring at them bitterly. "Fuck you," he muttered. "Who gives a shit if Shino thinks you're my biggest asset? I don't care." He looked up at the sky, his chest churning. "I don't care at all."
"ZREE! ZREEE!!"
He looked over at a cicada chirping rather loudly over on the tree he was sitting under. As he looked, he could see the large carpenter ants crawling up and down the wood, burrowing around the roots and coming up for food. One of them had wings, and he shuddered slightly. There was nothing worse than ants…but ants that could fly? Any bug that bit or stung and could fly made him nervous. That was downright disturbing. …Why was a drone venturing outside of the nest anyway? This wasn't the season for new colonies and new queens…
"ZREE! ZREEE!!"
He sighed, looking up at the sky and glaring once again. And there it was. Why the hell did he care about stupid bugs anyway? And why were they making him upset? They weren't roaches or anything.
"ZREE! ZREEE!!"
…Roach.
God damn it!
"ZREE! ZREE!! ZREEE!!"
His eyes darted to the tree, and he finally reached down to his left, picking up a rock and chunking it at the blasted thing. There was a soft "clunk" that sent him even further into a fit of rage. Why the fuck was everything reminding him of Shino!? Well, that was obvious, but still…he hated this so much! And if it wasn't one thing, it was–
"ZREEE!! ZREEE!!"
Oh, there was no fucking way…
He turned his head, surprised to see there was another sitting right above the one he'd just killed, causing an even bigger racket in its distress. Kiba reached down, picking up another rock. He tossed it, and it bounced off right next to the cicada. In response, the cicada gave a rather panicked and, yet, strangely huffy, "ZREEE!!" and flew off.
Kiba sighed, watching it. He pouted a little, hunkering back down in his chair. Well…that got rid of that problem, at least. Now there was a whole other problem he had to sort out… And then, very, very faintly, he heard–
"zreee! zreee!!"
His head whipped around to the backyard, and he stood. He stormed over to the metal fence separating both yards–back and front–and walked through it. He turned the corner, surprised to see a phone on the table emitting that infernal noise. He stared at it, stunned. Who's–
A hand reached out and grabbed it. Kiba's eyes drifted toward that arm, finally to the man holding the phone to his ear, glad his frizzed hair wasn't getting in the way. Kiba sneered, giving Shino the dirtiest look he could muster–something like a mix between "I've just seen the source of the next World War, you asswipe!" and "Oh, well that's a lovely ringtone you have, you fucking creep-o!"
Shino looked at the phone, not even noticing him, and let out a wide smile. Kiba's heart practically leaped out of his chest. It was that mystery gi–
"Dad!"
Wait…Dad!? It was a woman, surely! It had to be! There was no other way to… Who the hell was he kidding? Shino…with a girl? He'd told him before this whole mess that his relationship with TenTen had failed miserably. He couldn't remember why, but that wasn't really important was it? His ears turned back to the conversation, and he picked up what sounded like Shino laughing. Again.
And sure enough, that blasted man was. He was laughing.
"Dad, that joke is still funny, even after all these years. A dump truck. Classic. Anyway, why are you calling? …Uh huh? Really? That's great, D– Oh. It failed. Well…there'll be other women… Right……other blonde women… So…is that all you wanted to say?"
Shino waited a moment, listening, until he chuckled. "Geez, Dad… Why the hell would you go and do something like that…? No wonder it failed. Married women are off-limits–remember what you used to tell me? ……Oh…Oh…well…er…that's… Dad, she's his sister. …No, I'm not interested in her like that. …What the hell? Just because I'm not interested in my best friend's sister, it doesn't make me gay. I'm actually following your advice. I've become friends with her fiancée and she's pregnant. No way am I going after her. She's going to married soon– No. I've never gone after a married woman. ……Well…alright. I'll admit it. I did sort of have a relationship with my co-worker, Ino. But she'd divorced her husband long before I even went after her and– What? Oh. She was blonde. …Whatever. I don't go after a specific woman, Dad. I don't think I really have a certain fetish."
Kiba's heart sank, and he looked down at the grass beneath his feet, watching a stinkbug crawl across his foot. The sensation was almost painful, and he shuddered involuntarily. He lifted his leg, hoping the bug would just jump off…and it managed to crawl all the way under his foot. He winced, now feeling it tickling the bottom of his foot and being completely helpless at putting his foot down. Maybe he could just…
He burst out laughing when it hit the arch in his foot, and Shino turned to stare at him.
"Uh…Dad? I'm going to have to call you back…"
He closed the phone and stared at Kiba, watching him totter on one foot and laugh all at once. There was something going on with that one… Kiba bit his lip, putting his hands over his mouth, and fell backwards into the grass. Shino walked over slowly, wanting to figure out what was going on with him.
The brunette grabbed down, ripping the stink bug off his foot. That was a grave mistake, and soon he discovered the foulest stench emanating from his hand. He took a single sniff and put his hands to his nose, forgetting he was still holding it. He managed to shove it nearly up his nose and he just about died, as Shino looked on with a humorous expression on his face. It was something like amusement and distress all at once.
Kiba screeched. "Oh my God!! It's in my nose!! Ewww!!" He put a finger to one of his nostrils, exhaling sharply. The poor thing came flying out, landing on the ground and immediately scurrying off. Shino stared at it, then promptly burst out laughing.
He walked over, helping a very disgruntled and violated Kiba up. Kiba just glared at him, trying his hardest to contain his urge to faint at the stench that was refusing to go away now that it had marinated the insides of his nostril.
Shino wiped a tear from his eye and gave Kiba a hearty pat on the back. "Didn't your mother teach you not to stick foreign things up your nose?"
Kiba countered with a positively nasty, "Of course she did. It's a pity your mother never got to teach you that…" He glared at Shino, looking positively pleased with his insult. He crossed his hands over his chest, sticking his nose up at him curtly. "That strike a nerve?"
Shino just stared at him blankly…until he just walked off and went back to grilling. He grabbed his phone, dialing his father's number. It picked up, and he continued like nothing had ever happened. "Hey, Dad? Yeah. Sorry. Something happened, but I can talk now. Huh? What? Oh, I can't tell for sure, but I think my friend shoved a stinkbug up his nose…" He chuckled. "…Yeah, I said the same thing. But apparently it was an accident or something. …Oh. Yeah, he just mentioned something about my mother never getting the chance to teach me that." He burst out laughing. "Come on, Dad, I was only six and it was shiny… Of course I was tempted to stick it up there. Whatever, Dad. Whatever." He sighed sadly and playfully all at once, his voice jesting. "I was young and restless…"
Kiba just stomped off, completely furious that he hadn't gotten the reaction he'd wanted at all, long before he had a chance to hear Shino sigh and close the grill. The frizzy-haired man went over and sat down at the table, looking up at the sky.
"Yeah…I've been meaning to ask… About Mom… Why the hell did you never keep pictures of her?" There was a short moment of silence before his father struggled for a response to that.
"…Well…you never seemed to be interested…so…I just…never put them back up around the house after I'd finished grieving. You were in my room enough times, though…so surely you saw the ones I'd put up on the wall…"
"Dad…I never knew her. Her face doesn't really stick in my mind. I've forgotten what she looked like. Just…what was she like? What did she look like?"
"Well… She was the funniest person I'd ever met. I didn't laugh for years after she died, and that's not because I was grieving. I just…didn't find anything else funny. I had a different sense of humor than most. She knew exactly what made me laugh and made sure to make me laugh once a day, sometimes even more. She was so…smothering, though. Most of the time I had to leave the house just to escape her. She was just too passionate for me. Eventually…you were born and then she died and I realized I missed having her around. At the time I thought she was a pain in my ass, of course."
"That's…lovely?" Something twisted in his gut, and he started to get something eerily familiar about the entire situation creeping up in his chest.
His father started to laugh over the phone. "You have to understand, Shino, I need my space! I'd go out drinking with the guys to get away from her. When I came back, she'd smother me some more and tell me she loved me, asked me if I was cheating on her. She was very clingy, your mother…but she was also exactly who I needed to keep myself in check. It was hell being at home, but it was heaven at the same time. Do you understand?"
"…No."
His father sighed, struggling for words. "Your mother was really pretty. She had really frizzy red hair. That's where you get your frizzy hair. Thank goodness you didn't get that colour, though…" Shino could hear his father cringing. "It was pretty and all…but she really stuck out with that hair. That's why I liked her, though. She was just a bizarre character! She lit up every room she walked into and even some of the rooms down the hall! See?"
"…You just…changed the topic entirely…"
"Shino, your mother was a clingy, energetic, spastic ginger!"
He groaned, looking up at the sky a little bit. "Dad, that doesn't really…answer my question."
"It does, unless there's something else you want me to tell you that you haven't asked me yet…"
That was actually true, he could admit it. And that wasn't what he'd wanted to ask at first, either. He took a deep breath, letting the question fall out of his mouth like a lead weight. "…How much do you think she would have loved me?"
"…" His father went silent for a long, long time, until Shino had to stand up and open the grill. Once he'd checked to make sure the chicken was done, he deposited all of it onto a plate and stuck in the ribs. By the time he'd closed the grill again, his father finally started to talk.
"…She would've loved you so much…but…she wouldn't have been able to stand being around you. I know your mother. She could barely stand being around me sometimes, especially when I kept saying I needed my space. To be honest, if you were to meet her on the street…you probably wouldn't like her. Even if she was your mother. She was too moody for people like us, Shino. She was always fluctuating her moods, and most of the time when I came home she was in tears, thinking I'd planned on leaving for good. She over-reacted over everything. I don't think she would've been able to stand two of us around. She would've left for sure if she wound up living on into your adolescence."
"That's terrible, Dad. It's…not really comforting to know. Your marriage was so unsteady, and Mom wouldn't have been able to stand two of us around."
"You know, I tell myself the same thing, but at the end of the day I still look up at her pictures and try to remember exactly what it was about her that kept me going back home. I have to tell you, Shino…it was definitely the passion. As much as I wanted to just get out of there when we were still married. It was the fact that she wanted no one else but me."
"…She didn't want anyone else but you?" He smiled. "Sheesh, she could've done a lot better, Dad…"
His father laughed. "Oh, Shino. I miss having you around. You have her sense of humor."
"…Really? I just assume I'm being rude."
"No. That's definitely her sense of humor. Of course, when I pulled a jest like that on her, she'd go ballistic and think I was being serious. Your mother was…difficult. And she threw tantrums like you wouldn't believe. It took her ages to get over even the littlest things. You wouldn't believe the struggle I had when her father died. She was moping around for months! Hell, I still found her crying about it when she was pregnant with you, Shino! Of course, it wasn't like she was moping around, but it still affected her some two years later!"
Shino went silent, staring at the table. Then, he whispered.
"H…How did you get her to move on?"
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He stared up at the sky, wallowing around in his own self-pity. Shino was a complete asshole. Unfeeling, uncaring, mean, insensitive. He'd gotten upset the first time he mentioned his mother…so why not now? Why not now? What made today different than back then? He'd barely known Shino before. Surely that had hurt less than someone he cared about saying something like that…
Nevermind. He didn't care at all.
A bouquet of flowers was shoved in his face. They consisted of various kinds of flowers–daisies and poppies and various other flowers that grew on the side of the road, a few reeds from some random pond, one or two roses scattered in there, and finally, in the very center, a single borage.
He looked past it at the man holding them out to him, and he finally forced a smile on his face. "Thank you." He took them, taking in the scent of that stink bug when he sniffed the borage. Damn it. Had it really– Oh, there it was. He could smell it now. The scent of something that smelled almost exactly like cucumbers. The borage–his mother's smell, without the musk.
His frown returned and he set the flowers down beside him. "Shit. Now I've just gone and remembered her. Thanks a lot, Kidoumaru."
Kidoumaru rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, his cheeks tingeing pink. "Well, shucks, Kiba… I only did it because I knew you'd like it… Sorry. I can make up a new bouquet and bring it around if you like…"
He heard loud barking, and both men turned to see Juugo walking up, looking much calmer than he had before. The triplets looked calmer as well, though as rowdy as ever. Akamaru nudged Kiba real quick before getting dragged toward the gate by Juugo. The brunette touched Akamaru's head on reflex before the dog got pulled away, and he stared at Juugo, slightly surprised to see the orange-haired giant even looked like he'd cleaned himself up, too. He turned his head as the behemoth passed, suddenly shouting.
"Juugo!"
Juugo jumped slightly and turned back toward him, his face a bit puzzled. "Yeah?"
"You look great. Where did you go?"
"Oh…my new friend, Kimimaro. I passed him on the street. He gives great advice, but I'm sure you already know about that…" He stared at Kidoumaru, his eyes darkening. "…Who's that?"
Kidoumaru grinned, walking over and holding up his hand to him. "Kidoumaru! You're a friend of Kimimaro's? That makes me a friend of you, then! It's nice to meet you!"
Juugo stared at him for the longest time before a look of realization passed over his face. "Kidoumaru. Oh, that's right. Kimimaro was talking about you. It took me a while to put the name to your face because he kept calling you Spidernerd. Well, this was a nice chat, Spid–Kidoumaru." He shook the man's hand, opening up the back gate and letting the triplets and Akamaru go dashing into the backyard.
Kidoumaru gave the man a dark look. "…Yes. I'm…Spidernerd. I'm sure he told you all sorts of nasty things about me…"
"No. I mean, it was obvious he wasn't too fond of you, but he didn't really speak ill of you at all… He just kept saying Kiba was in love with you." As Juugo turned around to close the gate and turn the corner, Kidoumaru's face brightened and he turned around, eyeing Kiba.
Kiba forced a smile, suddenly getting cold feet. What the hell. Why had Juugo gone and just said it out loud to him like that?? He thought he was in love with the man at one point…but…now he knew he really loved Shino…
Kidoumaru walked back over, smiling devilishly. "So…you're in love with me, Kiba?"
The brunette smiled a little, nodding his head. Inside, he was practically shaking like a leaf. "Yes…Kidoumaru… Yeah. I'm in love with you. Thanks for the flowers. I really love them. You just sweep me off my feet…" He was so glad he'd had at least a little practice milking the situation for all it was worth. He had his mother to thank for that…and that rather humorous moment with Sasori weeks earlier…
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Juugo walked around the back, and Shino was already waiting for him. He had the barbeque all ready, and Hana was walking out of the house with a bowl of coleslaw and a few egg salad sandwiches on a plate–six in all. A bowl of chips had already been set toward the middle of the table, and what appeared to be some strange green dip took its place next to them. There were four glasses of lemonade at each spot and a pitcher in the very center. The dogs all ran off down to the kennels, and Hana placed the food-filled plates on the table. Shino grabbed the plates of meat and placed them around as best as he could, trying not to knock off any of the paper towels or plates set around the table for everyone.
Juugo walked over, his face softening considerably when he looked over at Hana. "Hana…" When she turned and looked at him, that soft smile on her face, he immediately went to her and grabbed her by the waist. "I'm so sorry for the way I acted. I shouldn't've run off like that… I just…I just…got so…er…" He went slightly pink, but his fiancée stroked his chin lovingly.
She stood up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek, placing a hand on his chest. "It's alright, dear. I understand you're just nervous being a fa–"
"Don't! Don't say that word." He paled considerably, forcing a smile. "N-Not until the baby's born… I mean…I just…I'd hate to get used to hearing that word and then…something…happening…with the baby…"
She chuckled, wrapping her arms around his neck. "That's alright, Juugo. I'm healthy as a horse. And you're healthy, too, so the baby will be healthy. You just have to trust me."
He winced. "Yes, but…but what if the baby…takes after me…"
"Oh, there's no worries there! I'm counting on it taking after you!"
His eyes widened, and he rubbed the back of his head anxiously. "Er…you are aware I broke my mother's tailbone coming out of her womb, right…? I'd…I'd hate for the same thing to happen to you… And…then there's also…this…this problem with my brain…"
She smiled warmly. "I don't see any problem with your brain, Juugo." As she reached up on her tiptoes and kissed his nose, she tapped on his temple with her knuckle lightly. "Nothing wrong in there…" She let go of his shoulder and patted her rear. "And if I broke my tailbone giving birth to the baby, that would be all the better for me, since I'd have such a loving husband to treat me like a queen and wait on me hand-and-foot while I was on bed rest…"
A smile lit up his face, and he bent down a little and kissed her tenderly. "With you around, I don't even need a therapist…"
Shino waved his hand between them, and both of them nearly jumped at how close he'd been to them the entire time. Juugo gave him a strange look and Hana put a hand to her chest. She stared at Shino, stuttering. "Sh-Shino…did…did you used to stand that close to your parents when they were having intimate moments??"
"No. My mother died shortly after I was born. Anyway. Where is Kiba?"
Juugo pointed with his thumb toward the gate around the corner behind him. "Back there. He's with some guy named Kidoumaru. Apparently he's in love with that guy. We should probably give them some time alone." He looked at Hana, his eyes earnest. "Maybe he can get Kiba out of this funk."
Shino stalked toward the corner, his voice a bit angrier than he intended. "Nonsense. Lunch is getting cold. He needs to come back here and eat with us. It'd be rude otherwise."
Both Juugo and Hana just smiled at each other knowingly and sat down at the table. She looked over at him, sighing happily. "Juugo, I made you some egg salad sandwiches because I know you won't eat any of this barbeque."
The man to her left gave a small, almost hidden, smile as he placed a hand on her back lightly. "Shino's going to be very angry at your prank, Hana."
"Good. I'm counting on it."
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Shino turned the corner and stopped at the gate, hugging the wall of the house as he stared at both men looking deeply into the other's eyes. His breathing hitched slightly, and for some reason anger welled up in his chest as the man–Kidoumaru–placed a gentle hand on Kiba's shoulder.
"Kiba, I brought you that bouquet as part of a mating ritual, you know…"
Kiba smiled wryly up at him, placing his hand over the other man's softly. "…You talking about spiders again, eh, Spiderman?"
The man leaned down, his voice in Kiba's ear, though Shino was surprised he could hear every word as clear as day–maybe he'd grown sensitive to this sort of thing? "I love how you call me that…I'm happy to know I finally caught you in my web… Now that I've caught you, I'm going to suck you dry…"
Kiba turned a rather embarrassed shade of red and forced a laugh–hell, Shino could easily tell that comment made him slightly uncomfortable, even if he was in love with that man. Kiba reached up and caressed his cheek with his thumb, practically cooing. "Talk spider to me some more… Or better yet, why don't I try it out for a change…? I'm actually fairly knowledgeable when it comes to the animal kingdom…"
The man obviously didn't believe a word he said, but he humored him anyway. "Alright…try it."
Kiba went silent, searching for words. Shino watched him struggle for something, finally leaning against the wall and standing back for the show. Sure, he was extremely angry over this whole thing with Kidoumaru…but he wanted to see if Kiba was more intelligent than he'd gathered from previous conversations.
"…" Kiba thought for a few moments before he dipped his voice, rubbing his hand along the other man's arm. "I'll bet you could live a week if I bit your head off…"
Shino had to bite his knuckle to keep from laughing, and Kidoumaru just stared at the man as if he were stupid. He took a small step back, finally laughing. He rubbed the back of his head, shifted from foot to foot and glanced at Kiba every once in a while. Finally, he shook his head. "That's…not sexy…especially if you were talking about the head of my penis…"
Kiba snapped his fingers together, looking over at him, eyes narrowing slightly. "And asking if someone would like to meet your friend Dorothy isn't charming at all. We're both in the same boat, dillweed."
Kidoumaru groaned, reaching back over and stroking his hand across Kiba's chest. The man reacted instantly, going rigid and bright red. He looked away at the tree beside him, his breathing quickening slightly. The other man chuckled, leaning over and grazing his lips against the brunette's ear. "It doesn't matter. I can still get a rise out of you…"
Shino swore under his breath, and Kidoumaru stroked Kiba's cheek, looking his catch straight in the eye. "Kiba…I have wanted you since high school. Can you imagine how many years that was? Nearly fourteen years, pup. Juugo says you love me, but I have to be sure…" He moved his head so that both of their foreheads were resting against each other. "Are you in love with me? Do you want to be my lover?"
Kiba smiled easily, reaching up and rubbing his thumb against Kidoumaru's bottom lip. "Yes. I am, and yes. I do." He closed his eyes and leaned over to kiss him, but Kidoumaru pushed him back into the seat a bit angrily.
"And Roach? You two seem awfully close."
Shino's chest twisted when Kiba just stared at Kidoumaru with the straightest face and replied, "That fucker? Sure I'm his best friend, but he's a real pain. Right now I want him to just leave me the fuck alone. Didn't you get that last night? Wasn't it obvious? Sure I ran after him, but you know how much I care about my friends. Even if he was being a jerk-off, I wanted to see if he was alright."
Kidoumaru frowned. "What is he to you, Kiba? Don't lie to me."
For what felt like a minute, Shino just stared at Kiba, his mind going a mile a minute. 'Say more…no, that makes no sense. Say I'm a jackpot. Say…Say something that'll make him lose interest, damn it! Can't you see that despite the fact that he cares about you, he's a total jack-off!? Say I'm your–no, that's absurd. I don't…well…I… What the hell do I feel about you anyway, Kiba? Hell, just say the truth or something! It's obvious I mean a lot!'
Kiba smiled. "He's my best friend, Kidoumaru. Nothing else. If I could feel anything for him, I would, but don't you think he's too weird for anyone's taste…?"
'What…the…hell… K-Kiba…?'
Why did he feel so upset about that?
Why did he feel like he'd just been betrayed?
Questions that had kept themselves hidden for the longest time suddenly rushed to the surface.
Kidoumaru smiled, putting his arms around Kiba's neck and leaning down to kiss him. He closed his mouth over Kiba's, and the brunette's hands wrapped around him to rest on his back in response.
'Oh hell no. No making out with my Kiba, fucker.'
Shino cupped his hands over his mouth, calling out. "Kiba!"
The second that name left his mouth, both of the men instantly tore apart, Kidoumaru nearly stumbling backwards into the wall and Kiba nearly falling over backwards in his chair, his head whipped around so fast. He turned, face slightly red, breathing a bit heavier than usual, his eyes as wide as saucers of milk.
"Sh-Shino!? Wh…uhm…h– H-How long have you been there??"
Shino walked over to the door of the gate, opening it. He didn't feel like answering that question. He nodded his head, pointing toward the backyard. "Didn't you smell the barbeque or do you still smell stinkbug? The food's done. We're all waiting for you." He turned to Kidoumaru, face calm. "There's not enough food for a guest. So…you'll have to leave. Sorry." The tone in his voice clearly said otherwise, and the amount of food they had would last for at least four days.
Kidoumaru grinned, catching that look in his eyes and knowing it well. He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly, grabbing Kiba and pulling him close, planting a kiss in the crook of his neck. All the while, his eyes were locked with Shino's, sparkling with the thrill of the soon-to-be game of who moved fastest. He was absolutely confident he'd come out the victor. He pushed Kiba away, not even prying his eyes from the much taller, paler man's.
"Go on, Kiba. Your friend is calling."
Kiba stared at the two, biting his lip a little. He groaned, walking through the fence and stumbling into the back yard. He rounded the corner, extremely upset. Of course…they hated each other. That was easy to see… How could he make Shino jealous if he couldn't even get Shino around him and Kidoumaru to witness anything? He'd already tried the night before, but Shino had walked away, caring too much about his ulcer.
Both of the men's eyes followed the brunette until he rounded the corner. Then, Kidoumaru walked right up to the fence, leaning against it confidently, arrogantly. "I saw you out of the corner of my eye, Roach. It's obvious he likes me more than you."
Shino ignored his comment, crossing his arms over his chest and simply replying, "You like spiders, right?"
Kidoumaru grinned, nodding his head. "It's a hobby. I collect them, see. I have rows and rows of plastic houses in my living room, and you wouldn't believe the amount of money I have to fork over to feed all of them… For a period of three months I had to collect my own pick for their food."
"…So you're aware the female spider chooses the male with the best gift, right?"
Kidoumaru nodded his head, going over and picking up the bouquet off the ground. He walked back over to Shino, handing it to him over the fence. "You're right. Be sure to give this to Kiba. He must've forgotten to pick it up when he walked back there… Of course, I hand-picked this bouquet knowing full well how much he cares about his mother. I knew how badly it would affect him because I love my mother even more than he loves his. I've known him for quite some time. Longer than you, Roach. It's natural this gift is much more heartfelt."
Shino just stared at the bouquet blankly before he smashed it against the fence with so much force many of the petals fell off of it. He smashed it against the fence until there were no more petals left at all–the only one intact being the borage. He picked it out, tossing the remaining bouquet to the ground. Kidoumaru stared at him in absolute shock, and Shino raised his eyebrows, giving the man a small smile.
"I brought him a dog the size of a small taxi. It's clear which gift is the best."
Kidoumaru, humiliated, barked out the only thing he could think of to make Shino back down. "Y-Yeah, well the female devours the male after she mates with him."
Shino's smile widened, knowing the history between them well. "Pity Kiba's not a female, eh, pest?" He sniffed the borage lightly, shrugging his shoulders. He locked the gate, spinning on his heels and going to the back of the house. As he rounded the corner, he could hear the gate rattling at how fiercely Kidoumaru was gripping it. There was a curse from behind him and he could hear the man stomping off as he made his way to the table.
Hana turned to him, smiling widely. "Shino! Is that a borage!? Those things take weeks to ship here! That's so sweet!"
Shino nodded, going and taking his spot next to Kiba, across from Hana. He handed it to her, giving her a curt nod that seemed to be his attempt at being debonair. She accepted it willingly, taking in the scent and showing it to Juugo happily. "Juugo! Smell it!"
Juugo smelled it, smiling lightly. "Yep. Just like cucumbers… Where'd you manage to find it?"
The man before them looked positively pleased with himself as he intertwined his fingers and propped his chin up in them. He smiled to himself like he had an inside joke none of them were a part of. "A friend of a friend." Kiba just rolled his eyes a little, knowing full well it was most likely from that bouquet Kidoumaru had brought him.
Hana nodded her head, looking at Juugo over the flower a bit more devilish than she would have liked, that grin slowly starting to form on her face. "Let's eat." She picked up a piece of chicken, and everyone did the same—though Juugo grabbed one of the egg salad sandwiches.
She took a bite, thoroughly enjoying the spiciness, and Shino smiled a little. "I hope it tastes good. I was on the phone at the time, so it might not be…well…done all the way…"
She shook her head, wiping some of the sauce off her face. "Oh, no, Shino! It's really great! You really outdid yourself! Your father sure did teach you well… My compliments to the chef. You made it sweet, just how Kiba and Juugo like it." She glanced at Kiba, who was staring at the chicken on his plate anxiously. She could tell he was upset over the all of the memories flooding over him, and for a split second she thought she'd gone out of her way for nothing.
The cook took a bite of his own and promptly spit it out, cursing sorely. "Shit!" He made a grab for his lemonade, downing a good third of the glass. Kiba turned to stare at him, eyes wide, and the two soon-to-be's across the table had to hide their laughter.
Shino stood, sticking his chicken with a fork and thrusting it in her face. "Why is this spicy? I told you I can't handle spicy foods with this ulcer! You have to know how badly this would go down if I ate this! Why would you deliberately get spicy sauce??" He pouted a little, clearly offended by her prank. Juugo started to laugh, and Shino sat back down, turning an embarrassed shade of pink. "See? And Juugo's laughing at me now… You're going to have hell to pay if my stomach starts hurting like crazy." He huffed, grabbing one of the egg salad sandwiches and trying to put this whole ordeal behind him. She leaned over, smearing sauce on his face absentmindedly, causing him to look back up at her with a look of utter horror plastered on his face.
She smiled warmly. "Well, just look at this as joining the family, Shino."
Everyone went silent as they appraised his reaction, and he finally chuckled, his face softening considerably. "…I can't see that as a good thing… Kiba's interested in a man who makes a hobby out of spiders, you conceived before even dating Juugo, and Juugo's considered a hazard in the eyes of the law…"
She and Juugo both started laughing, and they both pointed right at him, saying in unison, "See!? You fit right in!" It was obvious they'd make a wonderful couple–hell, they were already speaking in unison.
He stared at them for a long, long, long moment before he started to laugh. "Y-Yeah. You're right! Heh heh, I guess I do…"
Over to his left, a small sniff sounded in the air, and the three all turned to look at Kiba. He sat at the table, wiping at the tears flowing from his eyes, and laughed. It wasn't so much a laugh as an attempt at one that failed half-way, but it was the first to come from fondly remembering his mother, and that's what made it great. He propped his forehead into his left hand, elbow resting on the table, and coughed out another laugh. They all stared at him, and Hana reached over the table, taking his free hand.
She wiped at her eyes, sniffing a little herself. "I…well, I couldn't prank Mom like I promised you, s…so I pranked Shino, Kiba… I know it's not the same but–"
"It's good enough for me." He smiled, sniffling a little and wiping at his nose with the hand he'd stopped using to prop his forehead up with. He squeezed her hand back, looking over at her.
"Thank you, Hana, sis." He turned his eyes to Shino, wiping at his eyes again. "You…You really are a jackpot, Shino, buddy."
Shino smiled. "It's good to hear you talking like that again, Kiba."
"And it's good to hear something nice come out of your mouth for a change." He went back to his food, and Shino ignored that comment. For now he could let that slide, despite the fact that he thought he had been nice the entire time he was here. Inside, his chest tightened as he thought of what Kiba had told Kidoumaru:
"Yes. I am, and yes. I do."
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Later that night, Shino had left the kitchen where Juugo had his hand pressed to Hana's stomach and was cooing a little at the child forming in her belly. Juugo turned to her, his face a bit anxious. "Hana…what would you have done if I refused to accept the baby?"
She frowned. "…I would have broken the engagement… I mean…I know I love you…but this is still a life, Juugo. If you didn't want it…what were you expecting me to do? Abort it until we were ready for kids? I can't just do that… I wouldn't even think of it."
He smiled, kissing her forehead. "That's why I love you, Hana. I really think you should become a veterinarian…"
She looked at him, sighing. "Yes, but with this baby on the way, I'm going to need my current job to get by…"
"…If you started your own veterinary clinic, you could make your own hours and work around any emergencies that were brought up…"
"Yes, but I can't afford going to a university and relearning the basics and even more than that if I have this baby, dear… Everything will work out for the best… If I want to give this baby all the love my mother failed to give me in the prime years of my life, I'm going to have to ignore my desire for going back to school. That's what happened to my mother. She had so much she wanted to do it, and…she left me behind with Daddy. I can't do that with this baby…"
"Alright. If I could carry the baby for you I would." He stroked her cheek and kissed her, and she giggled.
"If you could carry the baby for me I'd toss it on you in an instant, Juugo…" They both shared a humorous laugh and she kissed him again. "If it's a boy, I'm naming it after Daddy. Is that alright? Nareta? You can choose the name if it's a girl…"
"Nareta? Well…if it's a girl…I guess I'll name it…" He nuzzled her neck, smiling. "I think I'll name her Nozomi."
"Hope? You're so cute, Juugo." She smiled widely, planting a kiss on his cheek.
Shino, meanwhile, had walked off into the hallway. Kiba was on his mother's bed again, and Shino went into the master bedroom. He stared at him for a moment before he walked over and sat down next to where he was lying.
Kiba sighed. "…That baby… It would be better if she miscarried…"
"That's a terrible thing to say."
"…I know…but Mom would agree with me. And I think Dad would, too. Maybe it's just wishful thinking…but…if she miscarried…she could go back to college and get a veterinary education and do what she's best at… Is it wrong for me to want that for her?"
"…No. But…to wish for a miscarriage…"
"I don't wish for the miscarriage. You can't deny it, Shino. Her being a prosecutor is bad for that baby. She sometimes gets home around nine. She may deny it or come up with ways to get around that…but with her current job, she still wouldn't be able to give that baby the amount of love she's saying she wants to give it… What I wish for is a chance for her to do what she loves."
"Isn't that what she's doing, though? Having a baby with Juugo…being able to support it…"
"…Where will she live? That suite barely suited me and her and Akamaru. Juugo's a giant and a baby needs something more stable than a penthouse."
"She said she wants to move to the suburbs."
"She can't afford that, even with all the money Mom gave her… What are they going to do, Shino? I can't see the good in them having this baby. Sure it would help them grow closer…but…it…"
"There's no sense in you worrying, Kiba. You've got enough to worry about."
Kiba looked up at him, frowning. "What do you mean?"
"…What are you going to do when I have to leave? I have two weeks come next Thursday. I can't stay here forever."
Kiba frowned. "You don't have to stay here. You can leave if you want…"
"…I'm not leaving without you. Too many people need you up there."
Kiba sighed. "…They don't. Shikamaru has Chouji; Neji and Sasuke aren't really that close to me. And you've got those roaches."
"…You think those roaches mean more to me than you do? I need you up there, Kiba."
Kiba turned and looked at him again, his cheeks growing hot. "…I know…but…"
"Kiba, before I met you, I didn't know if I was worth anything. …" He fell quiet for a while before he scratched the back of his head. trying to find the right words to express himself. "……I……I often wondered if my life meant anything. I was lonely and bitter and I couldn't see good in anything. I still have that problem…but…just…I know I am worth something, now. I know more people are concerned about me than I thought at first. …I know I had more friends than I realized, and…I know I'm appreciated by all of them. If you're not up there with me, I don't know… I'm afraid it'll come back. I'm afraid I'll start questioning my existence again." He bit his lip, twisting his fingers together anxiously. "…You mean more to me than a huge colony of roaches in my house keeping me company…"
Kiba looked up at him, his cheeks flushing even further. "…Are you serious?"
"…Do I look like I'm joking?"
Kiba bit his lip, looking up at the ceiling. "…I need time… I just… I'm sorry." He stood, walking out the door. A little while later, Shino could hear the back door slamming shut. A little while later, Shino could heard the door to the gate beside the window in the master bedroom open and close. A little while later, Kiba had left, probably to go take a walk or something.
Shino didn't really care where Kiba was going at the moment.
At the moment, he was concerned about was where he was going.
He frowned, standing and going back to the guest bedroom. He stared at the empty bed, slipped into it and looked up at the ceiling. He wasn't completely sure what he was feeling at the moment. He knew he was jealous of Kidoumaru. He knew he needed Kiba back in the city with him. He knew he felt right with Kiba. He…
He sighed, rolling over, and anxiousness started to churn about in his chest.
He had been reduced to questions back when he was a child. Back then he'd had simple questions: 'Why don't I feel like all the other children? Why are they embarrassed when their mothers pick them up for school? Isn't it more embarrassing with my Dad? Why can't I have my mother pick me up like that? Why don't I open up with anyone?'
When he hit high school, the questions had changed: 'What am I worth? Am I needed in this world? Do I even feel anything? Am I really alive inside? Why am I so detached? Why can't I relate with anyone other than my Dad? Why can't I relate with him when it comes to women, and why don't I get turned on my porn?'
Most of the questions stayed the same when he hit adulthood, but others popped up as well: 'Why doesn't it feel right with these girls? Why don't I care about them more? Why do I stay with this job even though I hate it?'
All of that uncertainty…all of that doubt…questions, questions, questions. Poof: Most of them were clear to him now. The questions that had lasted into adulthood were partially answered when he met Kiba.
' I am more open than most–or at least more open than Kimimaro–, I just have to trust someone first. I am worth something, at least, I'm worth being a friend. I do feel; I just don't feel as much as some people do and I don't feel in the same way as them. My father was the only one I trusted enough and he felt the same way I did. I can't relate to him when it comes to women because I don't like women; porn didn't affect me because I wasn't attracted to women, either. That's why it didn't feel right with the women I was with; I do care about them, it's just that I care about them for the sake that they need to be cared for, they need someone to show them concern and care…like TenTen… I care about them only as friends… I was with them because I was lonely, and for no other reason. I hated my job because I was lonely there and never connected with anyone; I started liking it when I knew Kiba would be there in the morning…'
Sure, if he had made any other friend they could've answered those questions inside him. But Kiba was…different than that, wasn't he? Kiba made the work place a source of happiness rather than anxiety and boredom. Kiba had helped grow closer to people. Kiba had even curbed all the anxiousness in him that kept him from sleeping. Kiba was attractive. He'd had that dream about him; he'd jacked off to him twice now. He wanted to be near him, wanted him by his side. He knew he was still reduced to questions even now…but now the questions had changed yet again:
'Does Kiba want me? Do I mean anything to Kiba? What is Ukon or Kimimaro to Kiba? Are they more than friends? And Kidoumaru–why does Kiba like him? Is it because he's good-looking and confident and caring? How much does Kiba love him?'
And all because of one man. …That gay, dog-loving, moody, vulnerable, tantrum-throwing pain in his side… That man that instantly seemed to see he was capable of being social, capable of caring about anything. That man that made him feel appreciated and needed and alive… Kiba Inuzuka: the man with a sister who was going to marry a man she prosecuted at one point, a sister with a big heart in love with a man with a heart just as big but with more difficulty expressing it… Kiba Inuzuka: the man that had a strange relationship with a dog the size of a small taxi that he babied like he would a child, despite the fact he could probably ride it like a horse… Kiba Inuzuka: the man that had answered so many questions and brought about so many more…
Shino closed his eyes, turning and facing the ceiling again. He couldn't sleep, and he didn't think he would all night. After all, he was fairly certain he had an answer to those questions that had been festering deep in his brain, silently hiding away and keeping their mouths shut. Now they were out in the open, floating around ever since that ordeal with Kidoumaru. Crossing his mind every ten seconds it seemed. His emotions were difficult to grasp most of the time, but he could grasp that much. He could grasp enough to answer those questions, finally.
'Is my love for Kiba more than that for a friend? Do I want to be more than his friend?'
Yes.
It was…and yes.
He did.