Note: Wow, 2 months have passed since I last posted for this fic and I am sorry to all at the delay. As many of you know much has happened for me, from sickness, losing a mentor of mine, and just this crazy busy life we all live. Plus, my Muse has not been flowing of late, however, it finally kicked in today and when? When I should have been at a meeting at work (not a very important one) and suddenly the chapter flows! Typical, but I'm happy this chapter is finally complete. Whew!

Note2: Also, thank you to everyone who has been sending me reviews for my other works, especially quite a few for the Alliance AU. For those of you are not logged onto FF net when you review and so I can't reply directly to you – thank you. And yes, I am currently working on the 3rd Alliance story – is Iketani dead? Are John and Teyla going to get together? What is Torren, Teyla's father, going to think of John when he meets him? All these questions and more are flowing. I should be able to start posting that fic once this one is completed. And YES, those who are nudging, or throwing things at me, to add more to 'Wishes' it is on the list, I promise. Maybe I need to miss more meetings! Might get fired though… Anyway, onward with Infection – love to you all, Wedj.

Infection

Chapter Twenty-Five - Elephant

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Mr and Mrs Darcy leant towards each other in their wedding carriage and shared a loving yet very polite kiss before the end titles began to run. With a smile of her own, Teyla leant forward and stopped the DVD. She had enjoyed the gentle romance, especially in that it had distracted her after Torren had gone back to her people with Halling earlier in the day. Halling had sat with her and John before leaving, and Carson had joined them for a short time. The Harvest Festival had gone very well by Halling's account, and the final tally of the harvest meant that there would be plenty of surplus for her people to use as trade. The soil of their new home world had been most generous, the weather predictable, and the lands having been untouched for many months had resulted in a bountiful harvest. Her people would be able to trade freely with other worlds and planned to increase next year's planting to take advantage of the good soil.

There had been no overt drama or tears when Torren left with Halling, pleased to see his honorary Uncle Halling, and it seemed that already he was growing used to parting from her again. Though it hurt inside to think that parting so frequently would become a major part of Torren's life now that she and Kanaan had separated, at the same time, she was pleased that he was growing used to it. Torren clearly felt more secure and contented now, happy to leave with those he loved, and seeming unaffected by her previously longer separation from him. She suspected the separation had affected her far more than her son, and that actually pleased her. He was still very young and the sooner he adapted to his new life with separated parents the better it would be for him. He was a strong boy, yet sensitive, but seemed content in the fact that he was loved by so many.

It also pleased her to know that very soon she would be free to spend more time with her son, for Carson had predicted this morning that she and John could likely be able to leave the isolation room within the next two days. After that, she would have as much time as she chose with her son, and that had lessened some of the sadness she had felt at saying goodbye to Torren when he had left with Halling.

As she removed the Pride and Prejudice DVD and set it in its case, she considered that she would in fact miss the relaxed atmosphere of the isolation room. Despite the situation that had led her and John to be kept in here, this last week in the isolation room had turned into something close to a relaxing holiday. She and John had turned the room into a comfortable place to live, and with a variety of people dropping in to visit them each day providing entertainment by their company or from the books, games and DVDs people had been kind enough to constantly supply them with. She was touched at how many people had taken the time to visit them, even just to poke their heads inside the isolation room to wish her and John well. Despite having been essentially imprisoned in the isolation room, she oddly felt more a part of the city than ever before after such kind attention from everyone. Though, she most certainly looked forward to being able to walk freely around the city again.

She closed up the laptop, set it aside, and considered what to do now. John had left some time ago for his daily workout, which he had missed this morning due to Torren and then Halling's presence. She had missed her own morning workout, so considered perhaps working through some of her katas or perhaps taking the opportunity for some meditation. She sat back in her seat and considered instead starting the new book that Jennifer had leant her this morning, but she was distracted from that thought by the remaining Rillaton that sat on the table in front of her. Halling had brought her the treat this morning.

She reached out towards the sweet treat that her people traditionally made for the Harvest Festival. She had shared most of it with the others this morning, and Torren had been allowed a taste or two. She set her fingers to a piece, lifting the light sticky treat up from the few other remaining pieces left in the traditional harvest baskets, that normally she would have helped to weave before the festival. The red cloth inside represented the bounty of harvest, and the sweetness of the Rillaton the reward for long labour to bring in the harvest, as well as a celebration of the riches the Ancestors had given them. She bit into the piece, savouring the sticky sweetness that was created by boiling the roots of the Rillat trees and mixing it with pounded sweet grain to produce the treat. The taste always took her back to her childhood, when the treat had seemed a luxury that might never be repeated.

She reached for another piece, feeling rather indulgent, but then she had missed the Harvest Festival, which she had never done before. She chewed on the Rillaton as she covered the remaining pieces with the cloth – she would share them with John this evening.

The cloth stuck to her fingers slightly, the Rillaton stickiness clinging to her skin. She licked her fingers, but knew from years of experience that she would need to wash her fingers to be rid of it completely.

She rose from her seat, licking at her fingertips. John would still be in the Physiotherapy room running on the treadmill, so the bathroom would be free for her to visit. She headed out of the isolation room to the small gap in the curtains outside. A young Marine stood on guard just outside the gap, a face she didn't recognise, which meant that he would be one of the new personnel transferred from the Daedalus this week. Rodney had reported that five new military staff had arrived, replacing those lost on the Hive ship and before.

She smiled at the new Marine, who was young and appeared to be taking his guard duty very seriously. Beyond him, Teyla could see Lieutenant McKenzie sat to one side, far more relaxed with his guard duty. She pushed the gap in the curtains open a little further with her non-sticky hand.

"Good afternoon, Ma'am," the Marine said politely.

"Please call me Teyla," she told him. He smiled, a little strained but kind enough. "I just wanted to let you both know that I am heading down to the bathroom briefly," she reported, now used to informing the guards of where she was going when moving around the Infirmary outside of the isolation room. Many times over the last weeks having such attention had annoyed her, and particularly John, but they had grown used to it by now, and besides it wouldn't be for much longer now.

"Walk around freely back there, Teyla," McKenzie said from his relaxed position, sat reading a sports magazine that he had borrowed from John's supply. "We're not as interested in you two anymore; you've both become really boring."

She smiled at his teasing. "And there I was considering climbing through another air vent, but since you look so comfortable there, I will remain boring."

McKenzie grinned as she turned away back into the curtained space outside the isolation room, the new Marine smiling politely to her again as she closed the gap in the curtains again. She headed down the curtained corridor towards Carson's lab.

It was empty inside; Carson was likely to be working in the main Infirmary or perhaps at lunch still. The lab looked different today than it had before. There were far fewer computers and supplies around. Only one computer terminal was on, waiting on standby, computer tablets, the digital camera, and an 'I Love Scotland' mug beside it.

The empty feel to the lab, outside of Carson's desk, was once again another reminder at how close to the end of her and John's treatment they neared. This morning, when she had looked at herself in the mirror, there had been no signs of blue or her former stripes across her skin. Only a small area on her right upper arm still had yet to return to normal, the injection site still standing out in scaly blue. John had assured her that her infection site would return to normal as his had done last time, his forearm showing no scar or discolouration from where Ellia had infected him with the Retrovirus last time. In no time, there would be no sign of her transformation, and she would be free of the isolation room, able to return to her normal life, with the only change being her separation from Kanaan.

Yet, she knew this experience had changed her, in that it had given her an interesting insight into the basic mind, the true feeling of freedom, and the powerful extent of her fighting skills. And of course, she valued how much stronger and deeper her friendship with John had become, despite the unexpected intimacy that had occurred that could have created distance between them rather than renewed closeness. She was very grateful that she had not lost John's friendship, and that it had instead regenerated into something far more open, to the point where he had even felt comfortable enough placing a kiss on her cheek last night. Her cheek felt warm just to recall his kiss.

She had been most fortunate in the outcome of all that had happened to her since the mission to Todd's infected Hive ship. Things could have worked out so much worse in so many ways.

The door to the bathroom set off Carson's lab stood open, as it nearly always did, the entrance leading round out of view into the space beyond that held the small shower, toilets, and sinks. She entered, returning her attention to the lingering sweetness of the Rillaton on her fingers, sucking on one of her fingertips to enjoy the very last of the sweet taste.

She became aware of the light steam in the air as she stepped into the main area of the bathroom, and then a sudden movement to her left drew her attention. John stood before one of the sinks, leant over it, his upper body bare as he splashed water up over his newly shaved chin and cheeks.

"Oh, John, I am sorry," she said at the same time as he noticed her in the reflection of the mirror before him. "I thought you would still be working out," she explained at having interrupted him.

He smiled at her though. "Don't worry about it, I'm pretty much done," he replied as he leant forward over the sink again and splashed more water over his chin before reaching for a hand towel, covering his lower face. "I'd had enough of running," he told her with a smile in his voice.

"Not as much fun?" She asked with a smile of her own, recalling their shared opinion of running now as compared to when they had been under the influence of the Retrovirus.

She found her eyes dropping to the wide expanse of John's back, all returned to his nice natural colour.

John chuckled into his towel as he turned and she lifted her eyes to meet his.

"No, it isn't. I'm sure gonna miss that feeling," he said, his smile appearing as he dried off his chin and then along the attractive straight line of his jaw.

She had seen John bare-chested several times before, but seeing him this way today felt different. She felt far more aware of his attractiveness, the wide male strength of his shoulders and the height of him smiling down at her. He was dressed in faded blue jeans and his hair was wet from his shower, the few tendrils of his fringe lying against his forehead, while the rest of his hair stood practically upright. He looked most appealing and today, for some reason, she felt more justified in her awareness of that fact. She found her eyes drawn to the towel drying along the other side of his jaw.

"Are you sick of shaving again yet?" She asked, since he had been so pleased when his beard had begun to grow again after his face returned to normal from the effects of the Retrovirus. He had confessed to her that he normally found shaving annoying, which explained why he so frequently chose not to have a close shave while on duty, however the changes to his face from the Retrovirus had led to him missing the habit of shaving.

"Not quite," John replied with a smile after thinking about it for a second.

The subject of facial and body hair had become a teasing point between him and Carson, John stating that its return, even if it meant shaving, was manly and a clear sign that he wasn't going to stay a 'bug' forever. The area of his chest below the towel displayed John's usual attractive amount of chest hair of which he had been so proud. She could understand why. She caught herself in that thought, rather embarrassed at thinking such thoughts whilst stood in front of him. The slightly flushed feeling that tickled her skin was not helped by the faint warm moisture in the air from his shower. As she drew in the warm air, it was strong with the scent of his body wash. She worked to maintain her relaxed casual manner and hide the interest she felt bubbling up within her.

Only then did it occur to her that it would be more polite to leave him alone to finish washing and that perhaps it was slightly inappropriate to be stood here so long.

"I will leave…" she began to excuse herself, starting to turn away, and already she could see John about to reply that she did not have to leave. However, in that moment, John had pitched his hand towel back towards the sink, revealing the full expanse of his upper chest.

And the blazingly obvious bite wound just under his left collarbone.

Teyla's eyes fell to it immediately and she froze, shocked at the sight of it. She could actually see her individual tooth marks drawn out in dark blue lines in two semi circles within the lighter blue that outlined it all. The area was small, but the alien colour stood out so sharply against his skin, displaying so clearly what she had done to him. It stole her breath for a moment.

A variety of intense emotions washed over her, all tumbling together and conflicting.

The shame at her behaviour, to have hurt him and infected him, was the loudest and most immediate thought. Such a violent act that she normally would have thought herself incapable, yet she could remember feeling the delight she had taken in biting him. To make him like her. She could even remember the taste of his blood on her tongue.

She snapped her eyes away, shocked at the thought, so wrong, yet at the same time full of a sensuality that she could not deny.

The memories flooded forward again. She had held him down beneath her, feeling both angry and confused at his previous attack and attempt to trap her, yet she had known that he was no true enemy. She had known that he was important, and within that thinking she had come to the conclusion that he should be like her. She had wanted him to be the same as her. Her bite had been born of a desperate instinct not to be alone, and the chance to possess that which she had been denied.

That thought shamed her again. It had been violent act, forcing on him something that he had not wanted, and which she had known, in a basic way, would alter him so completely.

Her eyes returned to the bite, forcing herself to look at what she had done to her friend.

He had forgiven her for the bite, for turning him into a 'bug' again, but seeing the remains of the bite now, she realised that she had not truly felt forgiven. Perhaps it was more that she had to forgive herself, but she did need to make sure that he truly understood how sorry she was for such a cruel act.

She forced herself to look up at John's face, up from the healed yet obvious infection site. He was watching her silently, for how long she had no idea, but she saw the light frown and searching look to his eyes.

"Tell me it does not pain you," she asked him quietly, the words slipping from her lips without thought, though that only made them all the more honest she supposed. She dropped her eyes back to the stark blue wound. Her own infection site was tiny, and though she felt no pain from it, she could not be sure that the same was true of his. Her wound had been a minute injection site; his had been a savage bite.

"It doesn't hurt," he replied immediately, his voice, as hers had been, was quieter than normal. "It's just the last bit to fade." There was understanding in his voice, she felt, but she knew that her question had been about more than physical pain.

She made herself look up at his face again, into his eyes that seemed concerned and somehow careful.

"I am sorry for what I did to you," she told him plainly. Her voice held more emotion than she had intended, but far less than what was circling within her.

She had said these words to him before and his forgiveness had been instant, but now she felt that he could see how weighted this matter was for her. She did not want a casual superficial and immediate apology this time, for she really needed to know that deep down he had truly forgiven her. That he understood she regretted her action greatly. For many years she had heard the discomfort and muttered comments from him about how much he had hated being turned into a 'bug' by Ellia before, so she knew how deep this repeat of that infection would have affected him. She knew it could not be a casually brushed aside event for him really, and she would not allow him, or herself, to make light of it. She would face the regret and pain she had caused, as much as she knew he would always forgive her, for at least then it truly would have been discussed and they could move on. Their discussions about what had happened previously had been light, always falling back on the standard blame the Retrovirus explanation, but in truth they had been dancing around what had happened. Though some aspects she knew would remain forever unaddressed, at least the bite and her actions behind it could be resolved.

She looked up at him now, holding his gaze, making sure that he could see the truth of her feelings of regret. That she knew how dramatic and cruel she had been in her bite and in infecting him. She would not shy from that anymore, or allow him to.

Already she could see that he understood, for he had not immediately given his casual evasive excuse and forgiveness as before. His gaze shifted, looking at her expression fully, looking into her eyes more than he normally would, and the light frown between his eyebrows spoke of some inner conflict of his own. She feared for a moment that perhaps his great distaste for being a 'bug' was more profound than she had realised and that perhaps he was not able to truly forgive her for mutating his body. She had not thought that would happen, and still doubted he would react that way, but she still felt momentarily fearful that her actions really were unforgivable.

So, she waited for his response, looking up at his face, the two of them stood alone together, him half bare, the air around them warm and damp from his shower, and the bite wound shining out for all to see who could enter.

"I'm not," he finally replied quietly.

The response threw her for a moment, and she frowned up at him, trying to understand what he meant.

"I'm not sorry it happened," he added, explaining further.

She had not expected that response, from all she had predicted and worried hearing; she had not even thought that he might say that. A sense of relief eased her, but she still frowned up at him, surprised at his point.

He broke eye contact briefly, making her realise how direct and long held it had been. He took a breath, his bare chest moving with the deep breath. His eyes returned to her and she waited for his response with rapt attention.

"If you hadn't turned me as well, we might not have gotten to you in time," he told her, his voice still quieter and slightly lower than normal.

She blinked, considering his point, and ignoring a tiny part of her felt faintly disappointed, having secretly hoped he had meant he did not regret something else that had happened between them.

"I slowed you down," he continued, "and then kept up with you around the piers, and that was only because I was turning into a bug too. If I hadn't, you would have given the teams the run around all night and we wouldn't have gotten to you in time to save you."

She could understand his point, but she frowned. "You would all have found a way. You and Ronon, and Rodney, you would have saved me," she informed him with certainty.

"You would have slipped into hibernation somewhere and we wouldn't have been able to find you," he replied. It was very unlike him to think of such negative outcomes; John keep fighting to the bitter end and then beyond, but now he seemed convinced that he would have failed.

"You would have found a way," she stated, sure that he would have. Her team had so many times found a way to beat the odds. "We always save each other," she reassured him with a smile.

"Like we did for Aiden and Elizabeth?" He asked, breaking through her argument instantly, and she saw the haunted look in his eyes for a moment, that far too closely echoed her own old pain. She nodded her acknowledgement of his point, for he was right – they did not always beat the odds. So many people had been lost from Atlantis over the years. Her and John's team had remained strong these past years, but the threat was real. There were not happy endings for all.

She let her eyes wander back to his bite wound. Perhaps he was right, that in infecting him she had in fact enabled him to save her. That was how he saw it, or at least that was what he wanted her to believe to save her the regret. She looked back up to his face, assessing him, wondering if his argument had been purely, or partly, to reassure her. Either way, he made a point and if wished to believe that being a bug had allowed him to save her, when simply being his normal human self would not have been enough, then she could not deny him that.

"You may be right," she admitted. "But I still wish that it had not been necessary to…" her eyes drifted back down to the bite.

John dipped his chin, looking down at his own chest, to the bite, and then he lifted his gaze to meet hers again, looking at her from under his brow. "I'm not," he stated plainly, the more usual bright sparkle to his eyes having returned somewhat.

It touched her that he was so insistent that her bite had allowed him to save her, that he seemed not to regret what had happened, and that he was insisting that she forgive herself for what she had done. Again, the weight lifted somewhat with relief.

"Even though I turned you into a bug?" She asked him, actually smiling, though still with some regret.

He grinned at that, surprising her further, since never before had he ever been able to smile about the subject. Before after Ellia, he had all but banned anyone mentioning Iratus or bugs in general. Now, here he was able to smile about it, and that lifted her heart greatly.

He lifted his chin, once again looking down at her as he smiled. "Actually, this time I kind of enjoyed being a 'bug'."

Now it was her time to grin, in surprise. "Really?" He nodded faintly, acknowledging the significance that he would actually say that.

"Because of the super powers?" She asked, which had been something they had joked about, or complained about when it had become clear to them both that their superhuman hearing and agility had been fading over the last two weeks. She liked to think there had been at least a small part of the experience that he had actually enjoyed.

He looked away as he smiled again. "They were cool," he said with feeling, making her smile wider. He looked back at her, his smile altering slightly. "But, that wasn't what I meant."

She lifted her eyebrows, questioning and curious as to what else he was going to share, so surprised she had been by him today, by his honesty and at how differently he had seen the experience than she had predicted and feared.

"I mean the part we don't talk about. The elephant in the room," he replied carefully, his eyes on her.

Yet again he had shocked her, but before she allowed herself to jump to the conclusion that she hoped he was referring to, she paused, wanting to make sure she understood what he had said.

"An elephant is one of those large Earth animals?" She asked, wanting to make sure she understood clearly.

"Yeah, those," he replied. "With the long trunk," he added.

Someone had given Torren a soft toy that depicted one of those animals, though she was sure that the mammals were not purple as was Torren's toy.

"But, they are not normally purple though?" She asked to be sure.

John smiled, knowing that she was referring to Torren's toy. "No, they're not. Though, maybe this one would be blue, like we were."

Despite his humour, the seriousness of the situation hit her. Was he truly referring to what had happened between them under the water tank? Excitement pushed her heart rate up suddenly. She took a breath to calm herself, for she was not sure yet that she had understood him correctly. Though, had he not said that he had enjoyed being turned into a bug because of this issue…

She realised that he seemed closer, though she thought she would have noticed him step forward. Perhaps it was simply that suddenly she was very much aware that they stood close, entirely alone, with no nurse or guards within hearing distance for the first time in weeks. The attractive scent of him filled her senses, as did the wide handsome expanse of his bare chest before her.

She drew another breath as she looked up at him, hoping that she had not misunderstood.

His expression seemed cautious to her, waiting for her response, and she realised that she had not answered him yet, so caught up in the fact that he might actually be speaking about this. She instantly regretted her silence, though had no idea how long it had lasted, for he had been the one, unexpectedly, to tread into this previously avoided area. She did not want him to think that she was about to turn him down, if he truly were offering…or did he simply wish to speak about the 'blue elephant' in the room? She had thought he had wished to leave the subject of what had happened between them alone, that he had been happy with the explanation of blaming the Retrovirus. Yet, this past week particularly, there had been a playful, almost flirtatious mood between them, and looking back on that, added to last night's soft kiss to her cheek, a new theory blossomed in her mind.

She studied his eyes again for a second, wondering if she was simply projecting something she had wanted for a long time onto this situation. However, in John she saw enough tension and held breath that she suspected her instincts were right and that she was over thinking the situation far too much. She should have learnt that from her experience from the Retrovirus – that sometimes one just has to act from basic deep feelings.

John's expression shifted, as if he had seen something in her face that had lessened his tension somewhat, and she saw the sparkle in his eyes grow slightly. The excitement and sudden warmth in her chest made her feel giddy for a moment. Was this truly, finally happening?

The air between her and John seemed somehow stronger, warmer, and she had the impulse to move closer to him. Towards his handsome, normal human skin. She recalled so clearly when they had circled around one another out in an unnamed corridor of a pier. How the circle had tightened, and how he had stepped right into her space, making her see and acknowledge him. Their minds had slid together and she had seen the look of desire in his altered alien eyes. Now, his normal human eyes smiled cautiously down at her, and she knew that he too no longer reacted from pure basic feelings, now there were doubts, worries, and questions for him as well. But, she was sure in that moment that she saw some of that same desire in his unusual green eyes, the dark centres seeming to grow wider as she looked up at him.

She found herself smiling then, delight coursing through her veins, and for a moment she was caught between holding this moment of potential for as long as possible, yet also desperately wanting to break it and find out what was to follow.

This time she definitely saw him shift his weight and step closer. She kept her eyes on his face as he moved closer, knowing that she could no longer hide any of her emotions from him.

He moved forward again, right up into her personal space, just as he had done before out in the pier, but this time it was a natural steady approach, his dark eyes on her and she lifted her hands to touch him. The warm skin of his chest and the tickle of chest hair met her fingertips as she touched her hands to him, as he leant forward and she stretched up slightly to meet his descending mouth. Heat and undeniable desire of her own drove her now, with no question, and she realised a split second before their lips met, that despite what they had shared under the water tank, they had never kissed during that time.

With that sudden knowledge and with all the eager desire she had repressed for so many years, she pressed her lips to his.

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TBC