NOTE: This is my answer of sorts to the whole "Jess is Luke, Logan is Christopher" nonsense. Rory getting pregnant was Lorelai's life going full circle. Rory's circle is her's and her's alone.

Rant over. With today being Father's Day 2018, an appropriate chapter for the day.

Fathers' Day

April 2017

New York, West Hartford, Stars Hollow

It was a beautiful spring day in New York. Rory was sitting on a bench in Madison Square Park waiting for her lunch companion to arrive. The last two weeks brought an unusual lull at work. With the all the copy written and interviews taped and edited, Rory and her colleagues were waiting for draft results from the design team. While annoying for some, after five months of constant activity, Rory welcomed the short break.

The break meant that Rory could concentrate on other matters, namely her book. It had been a while since she spent any real time on the project. After furiously writing for ten straight chapters, Rory found herself hitting a wall. Not just blocked but a full-scale writer's fortress. Jess tried to help by getting her manuscript to a couple of editor friends, but their notes did not ring true. One editor told her to keep digging, encouraging Rory to "unearth" Lorelai's more sinister side, "No one could go through all that emotional drama and not feel the least bit vengeful, " he wrote in his notes. "Ugh, yes they can." Rory thought to herself as she tore up the note. The other editor thought the story worked better as a work of fiction. "Try working your anecdotes into a story, sort of like Grey Gardens meets Rosanne, meets The Odd Couple." Not quite, Rory thought, as she ripped up that note as well.

It was during dinner with Paris and Doyle that inspiration hit her. "Doyle," she asked, "could you read my manuscript?"

"Me? Really?" Doyle responded with surprise.

"Well, you edited me before, you know me, my work, my style. Why not?"

"Ok, I'll give it a whirl."

Rory e-mailed the manuscript that very evening and now a week later they were meeting to discuss it.

"Hi there," she said as Doyle approached her. After the customary hug and kiss greeting, they got their lunch and dove into the book.

"First off" Doyle opened, "really really good. Boy, that mother of yours is one brave kooky lady. I love a woman with moxie."

"Thanks, that's what I was aiming for."

"And your Grandma? What a hoot!I Looooved the part when she went nuts after your great-grandmother died. Her Tennessee Williams moments had me in stitches." Grabbing an imaginary glass and holding an imaginary cigarette, Dole imitated Emily saying, "Want a drink? I learned to make mojitos!"

Doyle continued, "Lots of great stories, wonderful lessons there about family, strong women making it in the world, just one glaring deficit."

"What's that?"

"There not enough of you in it."

"What do you mean? This story is about my mother and me. I am writing the book for God's sake".

"You talk a great deal about your mom, but you are not an equal player. This book is called Gilmore Girls, not Gilmore Girl. You had the intention of writing a book about the both of you, but in the end, it's uneven. We know nothing about you. How did it feel to be raised by a single mom? How do you feel about your father not being around? How did the fact that you are best friends first and mother and daughter second affect the way you see the world? Those points are important, very important. You paint a perfect picture here. Even the messes you write about are perfect messes. The characters you have are fun but flat. Audiences these days are into authenticity, they don't want beautiful messes anymore, they want the blood, guts, and emotion. This you have here is too well packaged. It would have worked maybe 15-20 years ago, but today times are different."

"So ugly messes, not beautiful messes."

"Ok, maybe not ugly messes. How about honest emotion?"

"And that will bring dimension to my book?"

"Yes, in my honest and humble opinion."

"How am I suppose to do that?"

"I don't know. Go with your gut Gilmore."

"Ha, ha. Thanks.

"You know, this story could also work as a play or even a TV series."

"Really?"

"When I was reading it I could see the scenes playing out clearly. I even had it cast: Maura Tineary as your mom and Mae Whitman as you. Bonnie Bedelia and Craig T Nelson as your grandparents."

"And who, pray tell, would play Luke?"

"Ray Romano or that guy from Six Feet Under!"

"And Paris and you? "

"I don't know, Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds?"

"My mom and I talk pretty fast and have a lot of inside jokes. In a book at least you can read and reread at your own pace, but on TV? I don't think a TV audience could keep up, nor is ready for that kind of madness."

"Suit yourself. But if you want, I can pitch it the next time I am in Tinseltown."

"That's' ok. Thanks, Doyle, you've given me a lot to think about."

The following Saturday evening Rory arrived at Christopher's house for his 49th birthday party. This year he opted for a quiet celebration of "dinner, cake, conversation, and games with my girls." It has been a while since she's been to Christopher's house. After Christopher and Lorelai's divorce, he decided to stay in Connecticut so he could look after his mom and be near Rory.

Rory was looking forward to this evening. Her meeting with Doyle had her thinking about ways to beef up her book, and she realized that one of the holes that she needed to fill was finding clarity with her dad. Late last year, about two or three days after she found out she was pregnant, Rory met with her father to gain some insight on how she was to deal with her pregnancy. The meeting left her with more questions than answers. Tonight was going to be different. Hopefully, she thought, I can finally get those answers.

That was if she could get her father alone. Walking into the kitchen she found not only Gigi but also Francine, Christopher's mother.

"Rory!" Gigi cried as sauntered over to hug her sister. Rory marveled at how grown-up she looked.

"Hello Rory," Francine said pleasantly.

"Hello Mrs, Hay... I mean Francine. It's been a long time." Rory responded.

"Yes, it has. I think the last time we saw each other is right after Straub died."

"That long huh?"

"Way too long. So how are you? You look absolutely glowing."

"Thank you. I'm a week into my third trimester, so I feeling tired again. Not the exhaustion of the first trimester, just tired from the weight."

"Oh yes, I remember well."

"Really? It's been a very long time mom," Chris interjected

. "There are some things one does not forget." Francine shot back with a wry smile.

"Well everybody hungry? Mom and Gigi cooked enough food to feed an army."

"You cooked?" Rory was surprised.

Gigi replied, "Gran and I are taking a cooking class."

"I'm ashamed to say, short of making toast and boiling an egg, I never learned to cook. Gigi bought me classes for my birthday and we've been going together for a couple of weeks now."

"Sounds like fun."

"It is! Just, please don't judge us too much by our cooking."

The evening meal consisted of a baby green salad, vegetarian Lasagna with garlic bread, and cake and ice cream for dessert ("I bought the cake,I didn't want to push it." Francine confessed.)

After dessert came after dinner drinks (Port for the "grown-ups" and sparkling cider for Rory and Gigi) and a strangely competitive game of Cranium. Afterward, more desserts and drinks and more conversation. Topics such as the Trump Administration, the mannequin challenge, and leggings as pants phenomena were discussed. Francine added by telling the girls funny stories of Christopher when he was a kid. At one point Rory mentally stepped back and marveled at how comfortable she was hanging out with her family that she never really knew.

Before they knew it, it was close to midnight.

"Mom, why don't you stay the night? You to Rory. There's no point in driving home." Christopher said.

The four of them started tidying up before going to bed. While putting the dishes in the washer, Francine approached Rory. "Rory, I have an early appointment tomorrow, so if I don't see you I wanted to say goodbye."

"Well, it was great to see you, " Rory said with a hug.

"Rory, and there is no pressure, but I was wondering if you would like to meet for lunch sometime."

"Yes, I'd like that very much. I am in the city Tuesday through Thursday, but am in the area on the weekends."

"How about brunch next week?"

"That will work"

"Ok, I'll get your number from Chris and call you about the details."

"I look forward to it!"

"Me too."

"Good night Rory," Gigi said with a hug before going to bed.

"Good night Rory," Francine said too.

The two went upstairs, leaving Christopher and Rory alone.

"We only have one guest room, but you can take my room if you want," Christopher informed Rory

"No, it's ok. I'll take the couch in the study. It's very comfortable." She replied.

"So, how are you kid? You've expanded quite a bit since last I saw you."

"Yes, I have. This one is active too. Kicks me at the most inopportune moments."

"Well, this is Lorelai Gilmore's grandchild after all."

"And how would this kid be is s/he were Christopher Hayden's?"

"Quiet and passive aggressive."

"Got it."

"So what's been going on besides being kicked around?"

"Well, you know, busy at work. Although I had a bit of a lull so I was able to focus on my book for a bit of time."

"Yes, its been a while since you mentioned it."

"Well, I hit a wall, but a friend of mine helped me scale it."

"And how did that happen?"

"Well that friend Doyle, remember he was my editor when I was at Yale? He read the manuscript and said that there wasn't enough of me in it."

"How can that be? You wrote it."

"That's what I said! He said that I did not put enough of my point of view. That I needed to raise the volume of my voice."

"Well, it is hard when competing with your mother. So do you know how you're going to go about the changes?"

"Well yes, but I am going to need your help doing this."

"Ok, what can I do?"

"Tell me how you really felt about mom raising me alone."

Christopher let out a huge sigh and got up to pour himself a finger of scotch. "I thought we had this conversation?"

"Yes, but that was under a different context. Plus, you didn't really answer my question. You let me know that in the end, you realized it was best, but you didn't tell me how you actually felt about it or feel about it now."

"Why is this so important? Why do my feelings have any bearing on how you should feel about something?"

"Because I realized that I don't know the whole story. I know mom's point of view, but I don't know yours. I need to understand before I can form an opinion."

"Well, I hated it. I still hate it. I will always hate it. Not raising you is the biggest regret of my life."

"So if you hated it so much, why did you let it happen?"

"Because I was weak Rory."

"Oh."

Christopher was quiet for a moment to consider this words. "You know there were many things I envied about your mother when we were young. But, and this is going to surprise you, one of the things I envied the most was her relationship with Richard and Emily."

Rory, laughing in surprise and disbelief. "Whhhaaat?"

"Yes!" Christopher said seemingly surprised that he voiced this thought aloud, "Yes, Richard and Emily. Yes, Lorelai may have had a contentious relationship with them, but compared to the Hayden family, the Gilmores were the Brady Bunch."

"But they fought all the time!"

"Yes, they did. And as messed up as that was, at least they fought, at least they were communicating. In the Hayden house, there was no debate, there was no fighting. It was Straub's way or the highway. Imagine living in that kind of oppression? And it permeated into all facets of our lives, to the point that I was happy to have a uniform for school because if I didn't, I would have had anxiety attacks over what to wear every day. Sure I rebelled, but whenever Straub really got really serious and imposed his will, I always backed down. Lorelai always compared Emily to Idi Ammine? Compared to Straub, she was Martin Luther King Jr."

Christopher continued, "I know now that my dad, despite all his accomplishments, was a very sick and insecure man. He hated being thought of as nothing less than perfect. Mistakes were not an option for him, although when he did make them, we had to understand. You wouldn't know it, but he was a man that was so controlled by outside influences. Whether or not it was him winning a case, being an expert at something, he liked being sought after and envied. This was at the core of his being, and it spread to the family as well. Mom and I became an extension of his perfection, and we had to play the perfect part. When we didn't there was hell to pay."

"He didn't ever...get violent?"

"No, he did throw things every once in a while, but his influence and control were very insidious; he always framed his actions as him being altruistic like he was trying to help you to be better. He was very manipulative. He had a way of turning things around so that problem was always someone else's fault. That gift made him a successful lawyer and businessman, but personally, he was a big mess. The atmosphere in the house was so toxic. What kind of day you had was dependent on what mood he was in. I was so happy when he went off on business trips. It wasn't until years later, after all the failed business ventures, after all the false starts, all those things that I did to get his blessing and approval, that I realized what an asshole he really was and that I didn't need his approval. From then I was able to get my life relatively together. "

"Like getting a Volvo and marrying mom?"

"Hey that was a cool car and your mom and I getting together was a question that needed to be answered for both of us. You know Rory, as terrible as he was to me, I am not mad for me, I am mad for my mom."

"Francine?"

"Yes, she suffered so much while with him. It has only been in the past couple of years that she has been able to emerge from the fog. You know she was an artist? A very talented painter. I think that is why my dad fell for her; because she was so creative. Her ambition was always to be a wife and mother, but she still liked to paint. Anyway, there was one time early in their marriage that she was invited to participate in a joint show. Nothing too fancy, just a small gallery in West Port. Well, this one man, a man whom my father held in great esteem, had a negative reaction to one of mom's painting. It embarrassed dad, and after that, he told her that she had to stop engaging in such frivolity. Never mind that other people thought she was good. It was the opinion of one person that changed her life."

"Wow, I can't believe she let him do that. Why didn't she fight?"

"Because that is what she was trained to do. To support and follow her husband and to make him happy. He probably convinced her that she was not good enough anyway."

"That makes me so sad."

"It is sad. She started painting again. Gigi taking her to cooking lesson? That's big too. Asking you to brunch? That's huge. Straub is rolling in his grave as we speak. "

"What do you mean?"

"When we told my parents about you, he naturally hit the roof. He never wanted anything to do with you, Rory. Oh yes, there was the whole idea of your mother and me getting married, but really that was Emily and Richard's doing. If my father had his way Lorelai would not have gone through the pregnancy at all, or given you up for adoption, basically anything to keep me out of it. While publicly advocating marriage, in private it was all about how to rid ourselves of this "problem". Mom so wanted to be involved in your life, but again Straub put the kibosh on that too. Even on his deathbed. you would have thought that being so sick would have given someone perspective, but no, he was angry up until the last breath. Angry that he got sick, angry at how unfair life was, angry at how rotten life was because he worked so hard and nothing lived up to his expectations. In so many ways, it was a great relief when he finally went."

"So it was your dad that kept you away from us?"

"No, it was me. On the one hand, I had my dad who was adamantly against me being involved in your life, and on the other was Lorelei who was ready for us to bolt. For me, as a sixteen-year-old, it was very confusing. I think your mother sensed my hesitation because in the weeks before you were born, I felt her withdrawing from me. Whenever she discussed plans, they were no longer about "us" but about "her". What really sealed it was what happened when you were born. Lorelai didn't tell me until after the fact when you were all cleaned up and pretty. By the time I got to the hospital, you were already named for Pete's sake. And not just named, but named Gilmore, despite the fact that I was listed as your father on your birth certificate. Other than matching earlobes, there was nothing me or Hayden about you. I told your mother that I thought we should get married, but it was half-hearted because I felt like she already made her decision to go it alone. She knew I was not fully committed, and she didn't need the dead weight. I did try though. Your love for U2? I take credit for that."

"Really now? I think mom would go a couple of rounds with you on that."

"She would lose!" Christopher implored with a wry smile. "She hated U2 when they first came out. I would play records and she would tell me to," imitating Lorelai, " 'turn off that noise!'

When I would come to visit you, I would play them for you when she wasn't in the room. I even put a poster next to your crib."

"Yes, The October Album! I had that poster in my room for a while. I never thought about where I got it. I assumed it was from Mom. "

"No, it was from me." "I'm so, so sorry you had to go through this Dad."

Waving off her sympathy, "It's ok. I have made peace with this aspect of my life. I am lucky Rory, in many ways. I am lucky that I was able to pull myself together for Gigi. I am lucky that despite my absence you continued to welcome me into your life. I am lucky that I am able to hold down a job and function. What I want to do now is move forward. In some ways, it was better that your mom raised you alone. Remember how Straub treated you when we saw each other at your grandparents' house for dinner? He was very rude to you then. Imagine having to grow up with that? I like to think that by not being involved I was protecting you from him, saving you from a lifetime of heartache. Imagine being burdened with the notion that you are the source of all the Hayden family failures? Not a good life indeed."

"Yes, mom made the same observation."

"You are a kind, intelligent, wonderful young woman. It was hard for your mother, but in the end, this was the way life was supposed to happen. I have regrets, but I will take those regrets if it was meant to make you the person you are now. I wasn't there for you Rory, but I am now. I want you to have the parents and your baby to have the grandparents your mother and I did not have when we were in this situation. I want life to be better for this generation and not perpetuate the vicious cycle. So I am here for you kid, day and night, 24/7, 525,600 minutes a year, no matter what. You do know that don't you?

Rory looked at her father, and with a reassuring smile replied, "Yes dad, I know, I really do."

Later the following afternoon Rory was driving home. As she approached her apartment building, she suddenly changed directions, heading back through the main streets and towards Lorelai and Luke's house.

Rory arrived to find Luke's truck parked in the driveway. She went to the front door, ringing the doorbell before walking in, "Luke? Mom? Are you home?"

"I'm back here!' Luke replied. Rory headed towards the kitchen to find Luke folding laundry in her bedroom.

"I'm barely out the door and you turn my room into a laundry room?" she asked with mock offense.

"Well sorry, but it is a logical place seeing that the laundry is out the back door."

"It's ok Luke."

"So what's going on? Lorelai is out with Michele doing stuff for the Annex renovation."

"It's ok, I am just here to find something."

"Can I help?"

"It's a U2 poster." Rory responded while she looking through her desk drawers, "About 1/2 the size of a regular poster. It used to hang on that wall. I can't remember where I put it."

"It's not in your desk?"

"No... Oh yes, now I remember! I tucked it in with some record albums. Those are in the garage."

Luke suddenly became more alert.

"You want to go to the garage?"

"Yea."

"It really dirty there, you shouldn't go in there, not good for the baby."

"I'm not fragile Luke and baby is fine. There are no toxic chemicals in there right?"

"Well stuff is all over the place, I doubt you will find it."

"Luke?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you trying to keep me out of the garage?"

Caught, Luke gave in, "Ok, let's go."

Luke and Rory walked to the garage, where Rory found an unfinished crib like creation, obviously hand built by Luke.

"Luke! What did you do?"

"It's a co-sleeper. I read about it on the internet. You can leave this side open and put it right next to your bed so when the baby needs you at night all you have to do is reach over. When s/he gets older, you can put in another rail and make it into a mini crib. And, get some extension rails, and it becomes a twin bed."

Rory gave Luke a big hug, "I don't know what to say."

"I hope it's not too much. I know I've been going a bit nutty with the presents. I didn't get to be around when April was a baby, so my excitement is spilling over."

"No Luke, it's perfect. 'Thank you' doesn't seem enough."

"It's my pleasure. I'm really happy for you. This is such a great thing and well, now that you know, you can pick the stain so it can match the decor in your apartment."

"It's cool that the baby can say that his/her first and maybe only bed was made by...Luke, what is the baby going to call you?"

"I don't know...Luke?"

"Grandpa Luke?"

Luke smiles. "You know, I used to call my grandfather Grampy. I always thought that if I did become a grandfather, I would be called Grampy too."

"Ok, so Grampy it is. You know Grampy could be mixed up with Grumpy, right?"

"Yes, I know. My Grandfather was also known for that name as well."