Chapter 24
Long Night
In took three hours to find the name of the traitor, Wilson, and start to even uncover any data around him. Thus far the information was completely useless and it wasn't getting any better. Ty enjoyed the thrill of the hunt though, sifting through information and trying to crack the code, or in this case looking for any hint that this guy had something to do with what was happening to Shepard made it better. Breaking codes and finding information had been something that he had taken a liking to ever since he learned how to do it. Granted things were much easier now since his hacking programs made quick work of everything no matter how restricted they were, but stealing information was a fun past time no matter how easy it was.
The Med-Bay was still empty aside from Ty being the lone figure in it. It was a bit odd seeing the Normandy at this time since mostly everyone was asleep except for a few crew members that he didn't know by name. The former mercenary didn't pay mind to them though, at the moment his eyes were filled with the glowing of his omni-tool and all the information it brought up into his sights with a multitude of colors to signify the different files opened ranging from purple to blue to a regular orange. His eyes read each word, every miniscule detail did not get pass him, if his gut was right and this guy had caused this problem then he would not be able to get it past him.
Although he was enjoying the hunt for information, the only problem he encountered was that Wilson's file was an incredibly dull read. It was as if this guy wanted anyone reading it to beat their own heads against a wall while they read his file, and the worse part of it all was that nothing really stood out and said 'this could cause a problem.'
So far all it had been was his upbringing, why he joined Cerberus, or why he hated aliens. The guy had no reason to hate aliens other than just xenophobia. It was a completely ridiculous reason that Ty couldn't believe would make someone qualified for a job, but seeing as it was Cerberus and they were a Pro-Human organization it made sense.
Unfortunately for the warrior, his gut guided him and it was telling him that dismissing it completely would be stupid. With no other avenues to pursue, he forced himself to continue reading despite how extremely boring it was. There was something fishy about what the Illusive Man said though. Well everything that came out of that man's mouth was always twisted and only partial truths or just a small amount of information, it was a wonder how Miranda and Jacob had worked so long for him.
Ty had nothing really against Jacob except for the fact he worked for an egomaniacal psycho who hated aliens. He hadn't taken the time to talk to the man that often or really since he got on board, but he had read enough about him and had seen enough of him in the short amount of time they saw each other. The man didn't seem like a hater of aliens or an at all costs kind of guy.
Miranda was another conundrum of his. He knew a lot more about her than he had let on, in truth he was fully aware of her reasoning for joining Cerberus and how they helped her. Yet, at the same time, he still couldn't figure out how she could not see the messed up things the Illusive Man had ordered and just justify it. She wasn't an idiot, she was a very intelligent person who could succeed anywhere…but here she was working for Cerberus, one of the most messed up ideals in the Galaxy, and that was saying something with the inclusion of the Mad Prophet on Omega and he rated really high on Ty's messed up ideal scale.
Ty shook the thoughts from his mind; he couldn't let these superfluous thoughts distract him right now. If those two wanted to work for Cerberus then that was their own deal, but he wasn't going to sit by and listen to the Illusive Man's half-truths and bullshit on this traitor. Traitors always have more planned than they show or are able to do, that is why they are traitors. They are cunning and deceptive people who should not ever be overlooked and either the Illusive Man was hiding something from Miranda that the purple eyed warrior didn't care about or he was as ignorant as he thought.
It was a hard toss-up.
He would have had backup plans, failsafe's in case his initial plan failed. He would know Miranda would save Shepard no matter what and if he lived to tell the tale without them knowing, he wouldn't risk shooting her since he would be the prime suspect, Ty thought. His mind began looking at every angle of this man's plan. Shepard waking up must have stuck a knife in his initial plan. What could he do to knock her out or kill her without anyone knowing…Could he plant a bomb in her mind? They can't be too hard to come by and that facility had a lot of tech, but would he risk Miranda noticing?
There were so many possibilities that Ty couldn't see that this Wilson guy could be attacking from, like a viper coiling up, getting ready to strike. The warrior shuddered slightly at his own comparison, he hated those slithery creatures. He shut down one of his screens finding no useful information and pulled the blue screen from the side and into his view. A list of all the specialties of those on that facility, wow and they are all deceased except Miranda and Jacob. You really know how to keep your people safe Illusive Man, go you. Let's see Wilson, Wilson, Wilson. Where the hell is this guy? Wilson? Worked with Miranda on Project Lazarus, I think this is the right guy. Specialties aside from being a traitor? Hmm…Oh wow, he was handpicked for the Lazarus project because of his training in memory rebuilding that is pretty interesting but…oh shit…Fucking hell, Illusive Man you are fucking ignorant! You put this guy on the rebuild squad and he also specialized in memory wiping! And you didn't pass credits his way when you knew he was a stingy motherfucker!
Ty had found it and whether or not the Illusive Man knew this side information right this second was beyond him, but if he did he was personally going to whip up that QEC and reach through to rip that dumb bastards head off. "EDI how's the Commander?" Ty asked as he pulled more specifics on Wilson's training.
"She's had seven spikes in the last three minutes and is now pacing in her room." EDI answered.
You have got to be kidding me! Seven in three minutes? Oh this is going to be really bad. "I think I found a lead, forward a message to Miranda and tell her that you found something interesting in Wilson's file but you need her to look into Wilson's training right now. It is the only unrestricted thing she can get into. Oh and be sure to wake the Doc up, I think we're in for one hell of a night."
Of all the gut feelings Ty had, he hated the bad gut feelings that were sending alarms through his entire body, these ones were alerting him to the danger that was just around the corner. He could feel his heartbeat quickening at the possibilities of a memory wipe, who would take charge of saving the colonies from the Collectors and then get the entire Galaxy to unite to fight the Reapers. None of them could, only Shepard could and this Wilson guy was going to get them all killed.
The N7 was in so much danger right now and she didn't really know it, or maybe she had the same gut feeling he had but was trying to figure it out on her own. He was worried, more worried than he ever thought he would be about someone from the Alliance. Ty scowled slightly at himself, yeah she worked with the Alliance but she wasn't the Alliance. She was Shepard and that was a huge difference. She was becoming a good friend, someone worthy of his worry and someone who had taken the time to get to know him despite her ties to the people who outcasted him.
"Message sent. What do you think the problem is?" EDI asked.
"Research memory wiping and how quick it takes once activated. I think Wilson booby trapped the Commander's mind to a specific sight or smell or something that would act as the trigger. How long has she had the flares?" He asked as he continued searching for anything else he might have missed.
"There was one when she returned from Horizon after she found you knocked out down in Engineering."
Horizon? Shit that's where we met Kaiden. Seeing her old flame or something to do with him must have been the trigger. Shit, shit, shit. "EDI how's compiling data on memory wiping going?" He asked as worry worked its way into his tone and began reaching out to his body.
"My data mining takes time, but I have sufficient enough information in case there's an emergency."
In case? No this is for certain now, this is about to be the worst case scenario added with some Thresher Maw for icing and a Reaper as the candle to the cake bomb. Ty heard his stomach growl, yeah shut up stomach, this isn't the time to be hungry. This is about to be a shit storm so you're going wait. Before Ty could voice his next question EDI spoke, "Shepard has collapsed, brain activity is dangerously high. I believe memory wipe has begun."
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Ty yelled inside of his head. He couldn't do anything though, not because he was bed rested, he didn't give a damn about that, he couldn't do anything because he wasn't of a scientific mind or a doctor. All he would do is get in the way and that meant he couldn't help save the person who had ordered bringing him back to life and someone who had done a lot to help him whether she knew or not.
The purple eyed warrior forced himself to calm down. He needed to remain calm, losing his cool under pressure would get someone killed or more specifically Shepard in this case. "Get Miranda and Chakwas up there now. Do you know how to stop it or how long it takes?"
"Yes but I cannot help her myself."
Ty couldn't tell if that was supposed to be a joke or not. He was well aware that she physically couldn't help so maybe it was intended as a joke. It was hard to say so he continued on his orders. "Get Miranda and Chakwas and go to Shepard's quarters EDI. There's nothing I can do from here except get the elevator going down so get those two moving now."
EDI disappeared leaving the former mercenary to open up his hacking program and use it on the elevators circuitry to bring it to the Crew Quarters. Maybe I should add some extra speed to it; he shook his head at his thoughts. This was not the time to screw with the elevator speed since if he did screw it up, Shepard would be joining the Spirits of the fallen. Miranda and Chakwas went running from where they were to the elevator and now all he could do was sit, wait, and hope.
He felt useless, but he held onto the hope that everything would work out and he would see Shepard on her feet again with that stupid grin and her sapphire eyes filled with so much life, a life that shouldn't be cut short. It was unknown to him why he felt so strongly about her, but he didn't allow the thoughts to linger. They were more than likely just his protective thoughts over a friend and he wouldn't allow them to trouble him when he could do nothing.
Ty picked up a piece of the gun and continued where he had left off. The weapon was cleaned and ready for him to start doing more work on it when he got the chance, but he kept cleaning it to pass the time and keep his mind preoccupied. He couldn't let his thoughts drift to Shepard, the thoughts would begin to eat at him and he would begin to dwell on his inability to help. Doing so would only frustrate him without end so he focused all his energies on the weapon, the way it was, the way the pieces felt and the weight they had.
Part of him wondered if the reason he liked his sniper rifle so much was the same reason Zaeed loved Jessie so much. All guns, even guns of the same make, had a certain feel to them, kind of like a different heartbeat. When Ty was behind his scope the way his Viper felt in his hands made him feel invincible, though he knew how wrong that statement was based on his own injuries over the years. The heartbeat in his hands reverberated through the gun making it feel alive and as if nothing was able to touch him. He had the Viper for so many years now that it had become part of him and he would trade all the guns in the world for it to work if it ever broke. Ty smirked slightly to himself as he shook his head, now he really was sounding like Zaeed. "I'd trade all of my guns in for one last mission with that shitty old rifle."
The sound of Zaeed's voice bounced around in his head making him laugh slightly allowing him to forget for a few moments that something bad was going on. Time passed by slowly but eventually an hour passed since Miranda and Chakwas went running to the elevator and since then there hadn't been a peep from EDI or movement outside the Med-Bay except for the occasional miscellaneous crew member getting something to eat or drink.
Ty put the gun back together and set it back down on the bed then laid his head against the wall behind him. Fucking hell, why did this have to happen when I can't do anything to help? I'm not even allowed to leave this room. The thought processed through his brain and then his stomach growled. Fuck I'm hungry…What the fuck is wrong with me? Why am I following orders? I can walk. I should just take this gun and head to my room and sleep or get something to eat. I haven't eaten since…shit, almost two weeks now. Fuck it, I'm out of here I've been sitting on my ass way too long.
Without any other arguments to be had, the purple eyed man grabbed the gun and got off the bed with his stomach growling at him. Starvation was just around the corner but hearing his stomach growl was shocking, he usually ate at least more than a few days before this. He walked out of the room and put the gun on the table then went to the cabinets to find something to eat. There were some dextro snacks and some food that had to be cooked. Ew that sounds gross, probably what they call Rupert's surprise. Hmm, no that doesn't sound good…Ew regular ration paste…Oh my god is that…Holy shit it is ramen! Chicken flavor? Yes! That sounds so good right now!
He pulled out the bag of ramen, found a bowl then prepped and began cooking it. After it finished cooking he grabbed a spoon, brought it to the table and sat down to indulge himself in his guilty pleasure of ramen. It wasn't a big bowl but it was enough to get him by for another two weeks. Either way he was hungry and he was going to enjoy it. His mind drifted back to Shepard and he felt his worry only to shake his head in an attempt to shake the worry from his mind. I'm worrying way too much. It's Commander Shepard; she survived Akuze, defeated Saren, helped defeat a Reaper and survived the destruction of the original Normandy. This is small time compared to all those…but it still doesn't help it's been an hour with no word.
As he was sitting there eating his ramen and failing at not thinking about Shepard he heard an unsteady walk behind him. "Aren't you supposed to be in the Med-Bay?" Joker asked.
Ty looked back and saw Joker limping his way to the kitchen. He nodded at him and said, "Hey Joker, you getting a midnight snack or is your Fornax collection hidden down here."
"Sarcastic ass."
"I try."
The pilot limped over with a plate of food and sat across from him. "So any word on Shepard?" Joker asked.
Ty looked up from the table with a raised eyebrow. "How do you know about that?"
"EDI, apparently it's useful for something."
"You'll like her eventually, but no I haven't heard anything. What about you?"
Joker shook his head. "Not a peep. She'll be fine, she's survived worse."
"True. When you guys were going to take out Saren, why was Shepard getting headaches originally?"
The pilot took a bite of his food than as he finished chewing and swallowing it he answered, "I usually don't talk about Shepard to others, but she seems to trust you like she does me, Garrus and Tali so I guess I can talk to you. You know about her and the Akuze incident right?"
Ty nodded, everyone who knew about Shepard knew about Akuze and the Thresher Maws killing her whole squad. He continued eating his ramen as Joker began to explain, "Well you can only imagine how that affects someone mentally. It took her a while to get over it originally, but when she found Corporal Toombs, who was part of her squad, he killed himself because of what he went through after killing all the doctors that put him through it. That's when her original headaches started, Chakwas told me it was something like a PTSD but not as severe. After Saren and Sovereign were killed she stopped taking the pills Chakwas subscribed and she was fine, well as fine as Shepard can be."
She was one tough woman that was sure. Not many people could go through what she did and come out the other side still ready for more. Joker took a bite of his food then Ty asked, "Do you think that seeing Kaiden again on Horizon is what started her headaches and triggered whatever the hell is going on?"
Joker shrugged. "I haven't got a clue, that's not my field of expertise. Maybe it's something to do with the Collectors taking that colony. I have no idea, but she'll pull through, she always does and if she doesn't then the Reapers are going to kill us all."
Ty swallowed his noodles quickly making himself choke slightly before he began laughing through the choking. "Listen to you, Mr. Positivity." He managed to get through his choking.
"Hey if that happens I've got the Normandy and I plan on getting the hell out of here. You could stay or go."
"And you think you'll be able to hide from the Reapers in this ship? It's not as small as the old Normandy and the Reapers are very thorough." Ty said with his smirk.
The pilot frowned in defeat and said, "Not to mention an A.I. that would probably claim to be the vanguard of my destruction."
"Come on, give EDI a break. She's not all bad. She helped me out and probably saved Shepard's ass right now."
"It seems to think it was your idea." Joker said, looking up from his food.
Ty grabbed his now empty bowl with a satisfied stomach and stood up to go wash it all. As he walked away he said, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Sure you don't. C'mon Ty we both know you hacked Cerberus files to find out about that Wilson guy and his training in memory wiping." Ty sighed as he began washing his bowl and spoon. He didn't want recognition for anything, that's why he told EDI to tell Miranda that she had found it out not him. Not to mention there would more than likely be repercussions for hacking Cerberus files, the Illusive Man probably was triangulating the hack to him as he stood there washing his bowl.
There was no time to cover his tracks; there wasn't much point in his mind anyways since he was doing it for a damn good reason. "Just keep it between us then. I don't need Miranda on my ass about it."
"Don't worry, as long as the A.I. doesn't rat you out she won't know. Besides, Miranda probably wouldn't care. With all the rules you've broken, I'm surprised she hasn't had you report to the Illusive Man."
If she did, she and the Illusive Man would both regret it. He had a few choice words for that "man" if you could call him that. "Don't curse me Joker. Just do me a favor and don't tell anyone, including Shepard, okay? I don't need the attention for it."
Joker nodded and continued eating his food. Ty's hunger subsided but he still felt like he had enough room for a snack so he found a bag of chips and walked back to the table and sat down. As he was about to open the bag his ears caught the sound of two pairs of footsteps plus the dragging of another's feet. He looked up and Joker looked behind him and they saw Miranda and Chakwas both with one of Shepard's arms over their shoulders as they dragged her to the Med-Bay. "Told you she'd be fine." Joker commented.
"Yeah but I'm probably about to be told to go lay down in the Med-Bay again."
"Probably true. Miranda will probably be out here to scold you any second now."
"Here, have these," Ty said as he passed the chips to the pilot. "I'm not that hungry anyway."
"Ty, can I talk to you in here?" Miranda asked.
"See you later, Joker." He said as he grabbed the Avenger and got up.
"Don't hit your head on anything."
The purple eyed warrior flipped him off over his shoulder with a smirk making its way to his face. "Don't break any bones, brittle boy."
"Asshole."
Ty walked in and found Miranda and Chakwas both appearing mentally and physically exhausted from the events of the night. It was a sign to tread carefully with the Cerberus Operative. No I told you so, not too much sarcasm, she looks like she wants to rip someone's head off with her biotic's. Just be nice and stay cool, we can do that right?
"So it looks like she had a hell of a hangover." Ty said as he plopped himself down on his bed.
"Her memory was almost wiped but EDI managed to help us save her." Miranda said with a little of her ice queen edge.
"Okay, so what do you need from me aside from giving you two a break? Seriously you two go catch some sleep, I can watch her if you want. I can go a day without sleep anyway."
Miranda shook her head. "No, I need to make sure her memory is going to be intact. I should've noticed it before when I was still working on her; she wouldn't have had this happen if I would've paid more attention."
Ty rolled his eyes, and I thought I liked to blame myself for things I couldn't control. He looked over to Chakwas and asked, "Is Shepard stable and going to be fine?"
"Yes, but when she wakes she'll need to stay here until we can run some more tests on her."
"Okay, go catch some sleep, I'll watch over Shepard. She'll be fine until morning plus I need to talk to Miranda alone."
Chakwas nodded with a grateful smile. "Thank you Ty."
"No problem you earned a good night's rest." He said as he stood up. The doctor left and Ty walked up to Miranda who was running her hand through her raven black hair as she was hammering away on the terminal in front of her. He rested his hand on her shoulder and said, "Go get some rest Miranda, that's not a request."
Miranda swatted away his hand. "You're not my boss. I'll work if I want to."
Ty shook his head and sighed, he had really hoped she would have listened to him. It would have made things easier and he wasn't sure how well his new plan was going to work, but she was tired, her body was shaking even, she wasn't going to be able to put up much of a fight.
"I really hoped it wouldn't come to this, but you are forcing my hand."
"Wha- Hey!" Miranda shouted as he picked her up out of the chair and threw her over his right shoulder.
A smirk had already made its way to his face. "Shepard will be fine until morning; you need some rest so you can work at your full potential. I can watch over her since I'm supposed to be confined to bed rest, hell I'll even report to the Illusive Man if you want that way I can tell him how much of an ignorant jackass I think he is. You need rest and if I have to tie you down to your bed or knock you unconscious, I will."
Miranda was slamming her hands into the right side of his back which didn't really faze him at all as he walked out the Med-Bay. He had her legs gripped well enough that she couldn't knee him or move all that much except for what she was doing though he wished he had gagged or knocked her out first due to her yelling at him. "Put me down damn it! I will kill you if you don't put me down right now Ty! I swear that you'll be dead by my hands if you continue carrying me!"
Again he could only smirk at the empty threats. She was really too weak to do anything, she also seemed to be tapped out in the biotic department since she had yet to use them. As he walked towards Joker he saw him putting his empty dish in the sink and his empty bag of chips in the trash. His jaw dropped in a shock but he could see the sides of his mouth upturning into a smile. "Oh. My. God Ty. That…that's hilarious. Hold on, let me get a holo of that." Joker said while suppressing his laughs.
"Don't you DARE Joker! I will crush every bone in your body with my biotic's!"
"On second thought maybe I won't. I'd like to, you know, survive so I can still fly my baby."
"Oh come on, just one won't hurt." The purple eyed warrior said as he stopped in front of the kitchen counter.
Joker seemed to consider it but then said, "No. Sorry Ty, but I value my brittle life."
"LET ME GO!" Miranda yelled loudly.
"Oh shush you're going to wake everyone up. EDI mind taking a recording or a holo of me and Miranda so we can show Shepard when she wakes up?"
"EDI if you dar-"
"Don't listen to her EDI I won't let her do anything to you. Joker, do you want in on this?"
"Sure, what the hell. I can't get into too much trouble just by being in it." Joker answered limping over to Ty's left side.
EDI popped up above the kitchen counter. "Would you like a recording or a holo?"
"Take a holo it lasts longer." Joker answered.
"Do both EDI. Alright everyone smile like we actually like each other." Ty said with a big grin while wrapping his arm lightly around Joker's neck.
"Done I will send them to you Ty when you have recovered completely from your injury."
Ty let go of Joker and said, "Thanks EDI. Hey Joker, where did Shepard want you to fly to next?"
"Going to the Citadel to help Garrus out. We'll be there in two days. I figure we might get some shore leave with her injury after she helps Garrus."
The former mercenary shrugged and felt Miranda's weight go up and down with his shoulder, she wasn't very happy about that but he didn't let it stop him. "Beats me, don't know if Miranda would be too fond of that."
"I am still on your shoulder and if you don't put me down right now I will tear you in half with my biotic's!" She raised her voice again.
Ty looked around and asked, "Did you hear that? I swear I just heard Miranda's voice. It's like she's right here."
"God you are so going to get it when you let her go. So where would you like your funeral and what do you want done with your stuff?"
Ty titled his head up so he was looking up sideways at the ceiling acting like he was thinking hard on it. "Cremate me, give me back to my family and run for your lives. Give one tomahawk to them then give the other to Shepard, give Garrus my rifle, my pistols give to Jack and Tali. You can have my hoodie if you want Joker, if not give it to Shepard to decide who to give it to. The picture in my room give to Shepard and the holo in there give to my family."
Joker gave him a curious look. "Are you serious?"
Ty felt a chuckle come on. "Well yeah, if I die on this mission then someone who will survive needs to know what to do with me and my stuff."
"Damn it Ty, PUT ME DOWN!" Miranda yelled starting to slam her hands into his back again.
"There's that noise again, I swear it's like Miranda is standing right here." He said looking around again.
Joker just smirked and shook his head. "I have to get back up to the cockpit, and make sure you send me a copy of that holo and recording."
"I will don't worry. If Shepard is still being held against her will in the Med-Bay, aka bed-rest, bring us into the Citadel and tell the crew to go on shore leave. I'll watch over all the trouble making guys like Grunt, Jack and myself."
"Who is giving you the authority to do this, last time I checked I was-"
"Hung over my shoulder like a damsel in distress. You got all that, Joker?"
"I'll take care of it if Shepard's stuck in here. I'll see you later; unless you're dead then I won't be seeing much of anything from you."
Ty waved him off. "Don't worry, I'll be fine. See you, Joker. I have to put the Princess to bed."
"I'll prepare your funeral." Joker said as he started limping away.
With a roll of his eyes, he started walking over to Miranda's room while she was still thrashing about. He opened the door and walked around her desk to her bed where he put her down gently and onto her back and said in a joking manor, "Now be a good girl and go to sleep, otherwise I'll tie you down."
The Cerberus Operative attempted to stand up fast and punch him but he grabbed her arm and sidestepped her. "Now if you weren't exhausted, you probably would've hit that. Miranda go to sleep, trust me you need it."
"I need to do work and find out if there's anything else that I can do to help Shepard. It was my fault that this happened. I should've been paying attention to sabotage of any sort." Miranda said losing a little of her edge but Ty kept her arm in his hand.
"Do you really believe that?"
Miranda glared at him and said "I'm the project director. I was in charge of bringing her back without any issues, you're damn right I believe it."
The warrior released her hand allowing her to go for another punch that he caught right as it was about to hit his face. "Give yourself a break, Miranda. You may be created to be perfect, but you're still human just like me, Shepard, Jack, Jacob, Kelly, Joker and any other human on this ship." He told her as he brought her hand down but remained holding it at her wrist.
"That's none of your business." Miranda said through gritted teeth than she went for a punch with her other hand.
Ty caught it with ease. He had enough of it so he pulled her in close to him so they were face to face and looked her dead in the eyes. "It wasn't your fault. It was that traitors fault. Now you can think that you're going to sit in here and blame yourself all you want, but don't expect me to stay quiet. I don't give a shit if you were the project director or that you are the XO, those titles mean absolutely nothing to a person like me. You are fucking human Miranda, fuck what your father ever said about you needing to be better, fuck the Illusive Man making you feel that you need to push yourself harder, fuck everyone who ever thought that you should be held to a higher standard because of your genes and fuck your genes. They aren't what make you who you are as a person."
Though Miranda was unaware at the time, well everyone on the ship was actually unaware except for Ty who had just found out himself, but he had been created just like she was just with a few more additions. He held no resentment towards his father or his mother for their wish because that didn't change who they were to him or who he was to them. He was a Rhoddy through and through even if he and his brother were created inside a tube of some sort.
The Cerberus Operative tried to look away but he pulled her in closer so there bodies were touching forcing her to look him in the eyes which held hers with an angry stare. "I was created just like you were but I didn't know until my dad just told me. Do you think I'm going to use that to shape me to be who I am for the rest of my life. Money may have bought you everything, but it didn't make you who you are. Fuck that genetic tailoring bullshit."
Ty stopped and let go of one of her hands than poked her right below her throat and continued, "You decide who you become, not your genes. Your personality and what you do is what makes you the person you are, not some rich fucking asshole who decided to play god. Now you can tell me to go fuck myself, call me an asshole and try to kick me off this mission, but if you think for a goddamn second I'm going to let you stay up all night blaming yourself for something you couldn't control and making yourself believe that you should have seen it coming or whatever because of your genes, then you've mistaken me for some other follow the rules stick up the ass guy who doesn't speak his mind."
The years he had spent blaming himself for everything had been painful and knowing Miranda the way he did now she probably held every mistake she ever made against herself. It was probably the reason she could be such a frigid bitch. Ty let go of her other hand and let her move her body off his as he continued his rant, "I've been blaming myself for the past nine years because I thought I could've done better for everyone I lost, that I should have done better for them because of how much they meant to me and you want to know what all nine years have been like?"
It was a rhetorical question but he paused as the woman nodded slightly for him to continue, "It's been life draining, it's been like being shot and then having someone sticking their finger in it, it's felt like no matter what the fuck I do I can't do a goddamned thing right and I'm never fucking good enough for anything. So in short all nine years have fucking sucked except for the short two years I was with Ka'Reena and all the short good times I had after that and those were few in number and scattered."
Miranda gave him a look that was between surprise and shock and a little bit of understanding; the first two were probably because she never expected to hear anything like this from him. Regardless, he continued. "Every second, every minute, every day, week, month, and year have been a hell that never ends, from the time I wake and all the way into my sleep, all it has been is a constant reminder of what I failed to do. The people I failed and how much pain it caused me, they always find their ways from the memories to come back into my mind no matter how hard I try to lock them away, like having a collapsed lung and every breath you take burns and makes you wish to end your own life."
Her face softened slightly at his words. Ty didn't realize how much emotion he had flowing through him at the time and he wasn't sure how this all ended up coming out on her, but had he been alone thinking of these things or with his family he would have more than likely broke down into tears. It hurt thinking of all the pain of losing his friends and then the self-inflicted hell he put upon himself by believing it was his own fault.
His comparison struck his own heart cord though he kept his unbreakable fortress on the outside, it was true though. He could never describe realistically what the pain felt like except for saying it was like having his heart ripped from his chest and stamped flat right in front of him but no one knew what that felt like unless they to felt it, a collapsed lung and the constant pain it brought with each breath was exactly what his life had felt like day in and day out.
It was different now, the pain wasn't as severe and the scars were scabbing over but they would never truly heal he knew that much. All he could do was find balance once again. "I can see it in your eyes. You blame yourself for every failure, every mistake, every single minute detail that never went according to plan and you continue to force yourself through this hell that you have created all because you think that because of your genes all your failures are what matter and none of your accomplishments, accomplishments that you do on your own that have nothing to do with your genes. I'll be damned if I'm going let you torture yourself for another goddamn minute so sit your big round ass down, get some fucking sleep and stop blaming yourself, got it."
Miranda's face was without the icy structure it usually came with, her usually icy blue orbs had become softer and full of emotion, emotions Ty had not seen in the woman though that was many emotions. She sighed in defeat as she sat down and rested her face into her hands, not fighting back against his rant. Seeing that his work was done he started walking out since someone had to watch Shepard and he needed some time to himself anyway.
As he got to the door he stopped and looked back and saw Miranda still resting her face in her hands. Maybe I went a little overboard. I didn't intend too but despite her icy exterior she is still a person under there, a person with feelings just like everyone else. He decided he'd hit his rant home in a nicer way. "Miranda look at me." Ty said. Miranda looked up and he continued, "You're a good person under all this icy bullshit you put up. I can see it though you hide it with walls and walls of unbreakable stone, but you need to understand you're still human, no less than anyone else. Your real personality is what makes you beautiful along with the looks though you try and hide that by acting like an Ice Queen. I can see the other side of you and I know you hate that I know of it, but that's the real you and personally I like that side of you better. Take the rest of the night off; go to sleep, relax let your mind rest so when you have to work you're one hundred percent."
"How do you know I won't use my terminal or my omni-tool?"
Ty chuckled and waved his right arm at her computer as he activated his omni-tool with a hack that locked it completely with his own code. "Easy, I locked it with my own code and since you didn't notice I have quick hands."
He had grabbed her and pulled her in mostly for the rant, but he had also used it as a chance to remove a certain item. The woman looked down at her right hand then caught on to what he had said. "Damn you. Give me that back; there is sensitive information on there." She was now without her omni-tool though Ty held no intention to go through it, he only removed it so she would sleep.
"Don't worry about it Princess, I'm not going to look through it. I don't want to see your dirty pictures. Get some sleep, I'll see you in the morning and if Shepard has any issues I'll get EDI to get you, okay?"
"Fine." She sighed in defeat.
The doors opened and as he walked out he said, "Remember Miranda, you have the choice to either let your past define you and use it as a crutch or you can use it to make you stronger as a person. Only you can decide what you become, not me or anyone else, including your father." Ty himself was ready to stop letting his past failures be the only thing he remembered, but for now he had to watch over Shepard.