Nicola unlocked their door and entered the room before Caroline. As soon as Caroline closed the door behind her, Nicola turned and pinned her against the wall and kissed her fervently. Although she was very aroused, Caroline was instantly transported back to when she pinned Kate against the wall on their wedding night. The memory of it made her feel more than a little dizzy.

Nicola sensed her tense up and instinctively and gently released her. "What do we have for a nightcap?"

"I packed a bottle of scotch. If you prefer, I can go down to the bar and bring up something else," she suggested, hoping to buy some time to collect herself.

"Scotch is fine but I'll go down and bring up some ice."

Caroline opened her overnight bag to unpack the bottle of scotch and spied her new lingerie. She decided to head to the en suite to put it on, hoping that by doing so her nerves would calm down. Although she wanted this, she felt guilty about her desires and didn't know what to do.

As Nicola was heading for the ice, she tried to decide how best to cope with Caroline's clearly mixed emotions about moving their relationship to the next level. She fully understood Caroline's tensing up and wanted to make her feel supported. It was then that Nicola started feeling a bout of flop sweat coming on and realized she was nervous as well. She had been with Pat for a long time and felt that on some level she wasn't enough to keep Pat's attention. She decided she should slow things down a bit and talk with Caroline about her concerns and see if she could elicit Caroline's as well.

She returned to the room as Caroline was exiting the en suite.

"I'm sorry I tensed up back there. I'm sure you noticed," Caroline began.

"It's okay. I think we both understand that we each have some emotional baggage that gets a little heavy to carry at times. I think I was tensing up too," Nicola shared.

"You were? I guess I was so wrapped up in not wanting to disappoint you that I was only focused on my issues," Caroline replied. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Yes, but I think I'd like some of that scotch first," she said.

Caroline tightened the belt on her robe and cracked open the bottle. She poured two fingers worth of scotch for each of them as Nicola added the ice. They clinked their glasses together without any words and sat down facing each other on the settee.

"I think I've been so focused on supporting you as you move on from Kate that I forgot that I too am still moving on from Pat."

"Oh," said a shocked Caroline.

"No. That didn't come out right. Let me start again. When Pat cheated on me, it really rocked me. It made me feel very insecure and I blamed myself for her cheating, feeling I wasn't enough for her," she explained. "I guess I am feeling a little insecure and fear that I might not be enough for you. This has nothing to do with me wanting Pat back."

"Oh," Caroline said again. "That's…that's…no."

Nicola took a long sip on her scotch and waited for Caroline to find her words.

"Aren't we a pair? I didn't realize this room was going to be so crowded tonight or I would have tried harder to book us a bigger place," she said with a tender smile in an attempt to lighten the conversation. "I can't believe you are insecure. I am not comparing you to Kate at all. I'm just trying to not feel guilty about how much I care for you so soon after her passing."

"I get it. I really do. How about if we just hold each other tonight? When the time is right for both of us, we'll know and hopefully neither of us will feel any hesitancy."

"Sounds good. Why don't you get ready for bed," Caroline suggested as she drained the remains of her drink.

They turned down the covers and climbed in, meeting in the middle. They exchanged soft kisses and cradled each other until they both fell into a contented sleep.

At some point during the night, a thunder and lightening storm rolled in. They both were startled awake by a crack of thunder that sounded like it was directly overhead. A heavy rain immediately began to fall.

Caroline spoke first. "Wow. That sounded close. Are you okay?"

"Yes, but my heart is racing a bit from that thunder. Are you?"

"Hmmm. I always seem to be okay when I'm with you," Caroline replied and pulled Nicola to her for a kiss. Before either of them had time to think, the kiss deepened and progressed to the point that neither of them felt a bit of hesitancy whatsoever and neither heard the next crack of thunder.