Chapter Twenty Four
Peeta
It took hours and saying it over and over to finally convince her that they were still alive. It took me a lot longer to finally convince myself that they were safe. The thing is that when you love someone so much, you don't know what you would without them. The only thing that finally convinced her was the fact that Lilly would have never allowed herself to not protect her brother.
"She takes after you," I tell her. "Both of them take after you."
"How can you be so sure," she says to me.
I pause and listen to her voice. I know the answer and I know that there are things in my past that I have kept. It wasn't because I didn't want her to know, she knows the deepest darkest things that I have felt or done. She even knows the secret thoughts that I wish I had never thought of. The real reason why I haven't shared most of my experience when I was tortured in the Capitol was because I didn't want it to be real in the first place. Hearing her know, I can't see any other way than to finally let her know, how I can be so sure.
"It was probably the third or fourth day," I start. "Honestly till this day I don't know when a day started or ended back then. They had done so many things, they have tried so many different ways for me to crack."
The memory of it, is still so fresh, I can smell it.
"They brought a body," I say stopping. "Looked exactly…down to the smallest details. They kept it in a room and only let me look at it from behind glass. At first I thought it must have been a trick, that you truly wasn't dead. It was enough to break me, I thought that I had lost you. There was something that I couldn't shake, a feeling in the pit of my stomach. At first when they told me that you had died on the failed escape from the arena, that you were shot down from the sky. There was a feeling of guilt, and that is what I thought was the feeling in the pit of my stomach. I must cried for hours for the girl that I loved for so long."
I pause and remember where we are. The cold metal walls feel as if they are coming closer and close. It reminds me of the same hovercraft that took us after the arena exploded. It is surely to break me. Just like that night when they took Johanna with us, I can't see her but I can hear her. At this time I don't hear her, there is only silence, there isn't anything that I can make out but her breathing.
We were taken at gun point off the train to an awaiting hovercraft. The whole time seeing her walking I can see that she was beginning to believe that her children, were gone.
"Something didn't feel right," I say. "It was an exact copy of you, but it just didn't feel right. You know that feeling when you know something is off?"
Only silence.
"Katniss," I say. "You there?"
"Yeah," she says.
"Do you feel it?" I ask. "That feeling?"
It is the only reason why I haven't fallen apart right now. I can feel her, that she and Thomas are still alive. I can still feel them, and I have to trust that feeling, that thought that we will see each other again. There are no windows in the hovercraft, so this time around, I can't see where we are going.
"Just barely," she says. Those words are all I need to know that something inside of her believes my words, that our children are not dead, even if they tell us, even if they show video, there is that small doubt, that I call hope that will never let me stop until I see them again.
"Then hold onto it," I say. "That is all you need."
My hands go to the metal divider that separates us. I can still feel her, but it feels different. I wish I could hold her, and feel her in my arms. The thought of her suffering had always been something that I cannot withstand. To the girl that I feel in love go through more lost, it pained me when we lost her sister. It nearly destroyed her, and kept her prisoner for years, wondering if it was her who killed her. Back then it took everything, to bring her back, but she never gave up, even when it felt the loneliest moment of her life, I could always tell that she never gave up.
"You can't give up," I say. "You told me once to fight, to fight for the family that we have."
"But what if," she starts. The sound of the her voice unsure, and trembling. I can't fall apart, not now, not when she needs me. If I have to, I will be the strong one now, and she can rest on me. It is the last thing that they can never take from us, they can't take our will.
"Then fight for me," I say. "You let me fight for our children."
The hovercraft moves from side to side, and the rough winds gives me a reason to doubt that we are landing anywhere that we have been before, that or the pilot really needs to learn how to fly. The rough landing causes me to slip and slide from one side of the cell to another. I can hear the thump of the rough ground and think of the knife in the back of my pants. I quickly grab it and slide it into my boot, knowing full well that they will search us first, because they haven't yet.
The clicks sound in front of me and I know that we are going to welcomed the same way I was welcomed in the Detention Center. The door opens and I see the guards already pointing the guns at us.
"Hands," one yells at me. I look to the side and see her coming out of the cell. I reach out and she looks at me, grasping my hand. I mouth the words, that we will be okay, that they are alive. She smiles and nods at me, understanding that it is what I believe to be the truth.
"Hands up," the guard yells again. "I will not tell you again. You have five seconds."
We both look at them and with defiance in our faces we do not separate. The grip gets tighter and it reminds me of our defiance of the Capitol.
"Stop, stop stop," I hear Booth call out. "Lower your weapons. We are not barbarians."
The guards look around confused on which orders to follow. He again orders the guards to lower their weapons, which at the end they do, but after looking around to see what the other would do, you can tell that although Booth is the one in charge he is definitely not following any rule book that everyone knows.
He tries to walk over to us. The limp in his leg and I remember where the knife was driven in by Katniss. Someone walks up to Booth and hands him what I believe is a cane. He looks at it, examining it for a little bit. This gives me enough time to look around. The landing pad for the hovercraft is small, and the trees that surround it, is so tall that I think that is why the pilot was having difficulty landing.
I can't see anything else but a house in front of us. It is an odd place to put a military base, but then again, this is probably part of no military, part of no rebellion, probably just this one crazy person's desire to make my family suffer. Two of the more formal attendants come up to us and in the same Capitol fashion actually escorts us through the many many guards. The house is a large estate all glass rooms with large overhang concrete floors. The style is very modern and you can tell that he is very proud of this house.
'Could it be his house?'
We walk inside the house and immediately see the other attendants working hard in preparation of something. Booth in front of us stops and turns around.
"The two attendants will take you upstairs to your rooms to prepare," he says. Coming over and clipping on a gold like bracelet on both of us. He then instructs the attendants to remove the jackets. We both look at them as the walk over and with a special transmitter turn off the red light on the vest. They unclip the vest and slide it off us.
"Upstairs the attendants will assist you in drawing a bath and laying out your clothes for the event," he says turning around and beginning to walk up the nearby stairs. He pauses and without turning around he says in a loud voice. "If you are thinking of declining my offer because of the change in wardrobe, those lovely bracelets has inside a liquid that can easily kill either one of you. And yes it does have a transmitter in them."
He disappears and the attendants which do not speak motion for us to follow them. They are probably Avoxes, unable to speak. The practice was abolished back when then President Paylor first came into office. We follow them up the stairs still hand in hand, until we are moved into a room. Outside the room is stationed a guard and we walk inside we see the view from the second story room. In the distance you can see the Spires of the District One, and realize that we are in the worst possible place imaginable.
One of the Avoxes walks Katniss over to the clothing rack and hands her the dress. The other Avox hands me the suit. It seems that we are going to a party.
Thomas
She shivers in the cold, stubborn as a mule. My mother always told me that my father could be stubborn but no one is more stubborn than my sister. It isn't an hour after I was able to remove the bullet that she wants to move camp. At one point I wanted to knock her out just to get her to stop moving. Of course that wouldn't help me one bit when she wakes up and is geared towards getting me back. She is always trying to protect me, always being the big sister. She doesn't believe that I can take care of myself, that although I am only fourteen, I took the same survival classes she did, and we both passed. I hope I did it right.
Grandmas teaching on how to cauterize a wound was so long ago, that it took me a while to remember just how hot it needed to be in order to make sure that the wound wouldn't get infected. The screams didn't help, not to mention all that swearing. I tell you if mama was here she would have gotten a good talking to about that. It must be painful, to have yourself purposely burned. Touching her on her forehead, there is no fever, which is a good thing, because she isn't going into shock, yet.
"It isn't working, the pressure isn't stopping the bleeding. We have to seal it. I will be quick about it," I say to her. She looks at me wishing that I didn't have to do at all. She grips her hands into fists, her eyes closed and her teeth on the leather belt. I can see her bracing for the pain.
The small first aid kit that I had in my backpack I always carried. It had basic things, like forceps, small bottle of alcohol, a scalpel, a needle and thread. I rip off a piece of my shirt and soaking it in alcohol, I tell her to hold it to the wound. She lets out a yelp of pain as the alcohol stings the bullet wound. After a couple of seconds, she removes it and I see that the wound has been cleaned as best as we can. I give her one of my clean socks.
"I will do it quick," I say. "When I tell you, pull away the sock, okay?"
It took me a couple of tries outside, to calm my nerves enough to use it. Nodding at her, she removed it and when I placed the tip on the wound, I could hear the sizzle of the skin. I live it on, for two seconds and after removing it, I look to see that the bleeding that wouldn't stop, had now become almost non-existent.
"You still with me," I say looking at her with eyes closed. She looks at me and nods. I let out the breath that I had been holding in, since I saw the wound. "Going to clean it one more time with alcohol to make sure that you don't get an infection. Once I am done cleaning it, I will wrap it, and you will have to stay put until tomorrow."
As soon as the word tomorrow left my mouth, I wish I could have stopped it. Her eyes widen so big that it is as if I told her the worst news possible, even worst if I had told her that she was shot. No wait, I did tell her, and this news is worse than that.
"Tomorrow?" She says dropping the belt. "We can't."
She tries to stand up, but of course can't. After a couple of tries, I stand up and look at her. The way she struggles to stand. The things that she says, that people are after us.
"Why are you so stubborn," I say. "Do you think that I am stupid, of course I know that people are after us and no I don't think this is a game. I will stay watch. You need to sleep, you just got shot and I had to put a blazing hot knife to you wound. What the hell, do you think you are some robot? You won't be able to make twenty feet without collapsing."
"You don't understand," she starts.
"I understand plenty," I say angrily. "You may think that I am kid, but I know how to take care of myself. You need to stop treating me like an invalid that can't do anything. I know how to stand watch, and just in case of anything I will wake you up, okay. Please, Lil, I need you to trust me on this."
"Okay," she finally tells me. "You wake me if you get tired."
I nod and finally although she was fighting a losing battle, she closed her eyes and then drifted off into sleep. Every so often I would make sure that she was breathing, making sure that she wasn't running a fever. The night came and went, and nothing, only the sounds of the night crickets. It was only when the sun started to peek out that it started to rain, the small drizzle of the rain started a good distance from us. I looked up and saw that the tree that we camped under should provide us with at least some sort of cover. Her eyes opened before I could ever wake her.
"It is morning?" she says.
"Yep," I say. "You know what? You snore."
She smiles and sticks out her tongue at me. Looking down she sees the coat over her, and grabbing it tosses it to me. I grab it and put it back on. Picking up the contraption I spent hours making last night I hand it to her. She looks at it, and in her hands she thinks that it is a weapon, and probably it is, but when I made it, it was supposed to be a crutch.
"It is a crutch," I say. "You can think it is a weapon all you want, but as you said, we need to get moving, and this should help you be just a little bit more mobile. Although you probably won't be any quieter than Papa."
She lets out a laugh at the thought. Anyone can be quieter than Papa. He is a good hunter, don't get me wrong, but not like Mama, or Lily. Just to make him feel better, I make just a little bit more noise than usual. I hand her a fish that I caught earlier this morning.
"Don't worry, I didn't start a new fire," I say. "I used the hot wood before it started raining."
Helping her to her feet, she places the crutch under her armpit to steady her. The grimace on her face and I know that the bullet wound is still too much to bare. I put her pack on me and grab her bow and arrows.
"Come on," I say hooking my arm around her. "Let's get moving. I think that the District border is about a mile in that direction. I tried to scout ahead but didn't want to leave you alone for more than a couple of minutes."
We walk slowly, through the woods, not caring about the trail that we are leaving. Although Lilly kept on looking back to make sure that we were not being followed. We had to stop a couple of times for her to catch her breath which of course she denied and said that it was to make sure that we were not being followed. I tell you, my family sometimes have so much pride in showing their strength. Well wait, that isn't true, the women in our family is what I meant. My father would just have told them that he was tired and that he needed to take a breather. One of the things that I miss right now, the way he could make us feel all safe, even though we know the truth is far from it.
After a while, and a lot of walking and stopping, we make it to the edge of the forest and looking at the nearby District, I wonder which one it is. The fence just says 'caution electrical fence' like it does for all of them, heck even ours still have it. I wonder if any of the other Districts actually turn on their fences. Nowadays there isn't really any need for it, as game doesn't go into the Districts, and the Capitol is not keeping people from leaving. It is safer though to stay inside the District. I wonder for us though, is it safer here in the woods than to walk into the District.
"You ready?" I say looking at her.
"Not really," she response. "But what choice do we have."
Stopping at the fence, we place our ears near the wire and find it to be dead silent. She reaches first and as the tip of her fingers touch the metal wiring, she looks at me and goes under the wire. I follow her and as we walk, we see that the area that we cross into the District is abandoned buildings. It would work well for hiding out, but we need to get a message out to people back home.
"Lil," I say starting to unstring the bow. "We need to not draw attention."
She nods and hands me the bow, as she is still struggling to even walk properly. It will be a little bit more difficult if they see her with a bullet wound. Will have to get some clothes for her.
"Going to go into the market and get some clothes for us to change in," I say. "We can't have you going around with a ripped pant with a bullet wound."
Leaving her in the nearby abandon warehouse, I hand her my backpack. She tells me that I have to be careful, and of course I tell her that I will be back in a couple of minutes. She is always trying to take care of me, but now from what I can see, she is trying to let me do things on my own.
I walk through the empty streets until for the first time, I find someone walking towards what I can see is the District's Justice Building. I put my head down and follow from a distance, trying to make sure that he doesn't really see that I am following. Once we pass a couple of street, I can see the people start to become more and more visible.
'Great, I am getting closer to a more dense population.'
I slow down and seeing the closet clothing store. I walk towards the door and see a couple of Peace keepers walking down the street, probably on patrol. I duck into the nearby alley and wait for them to pass. The only thing that I know are the stories that my parents told me, and if the Peace keepers were bad back then, then they are not to be trusted.
I wait there for a moment until I see them pass by. After a couple of seconds I walk back into the street and then into the store. Looking around there are a couple of people in the store. I grab the first shirt and jeans that I could find that fit me. Walking over to the smaller sizes I grab another shirt and jeans for Lil. As I make it to the counter, I grab two caps and then place all the items on the counter. The gentleman was folding some clothes and as he looks up, I smile.
"Good morning, sir," I say.
"Good morning young man," he says. "How are we today?"
"It is a beautiful day, don't you think?" I say trying to sound as if I am visiting the District.
"First time in our District," he says. "You don't look like you are from around here."
He starts to ring up the purchases. Behind him I see a television playing a news cast. It is on mute and I can see that the gentleman is waiting for an explanation of who I am.
"Well my family came to for a visit, and…excuse but what happened?" I say pointing towards the television.
He looks back and sees the news cast and shakes his head.
"Shame," he says. "All those people. They are saying it was some sort of train derailment. Everyone on the train died when it caught on fire. From what they can tell, a train from District Four was riding back, and took the curve too fast and derailed. The whole thing burst into flames. Brings back too many bad memories over here."
He places the clothing into the bag. I hand him the money that he asks.
"I am sorry but what memories, where you referring to," I say wondering.
"Oh I am sorry," he says. "You must be too young to remember the Great War. You looked older than what I figured."
"That is okay," I say smiling. It is the first time someone didn't think I was kid. That at the very least I was Lilly age, or probably older.
"There was a dam that the rebels destroyed back in the Great War, flooded the old school district up by Pine," he says. "Lots of people died that day. Death always brings back the memories of the War."
"I am sorry to hear that," I say waving as if I am leaving. As I am walking towards the door, I turn around and ask where the nearest phone would be.
"Hmm," he says thinking. "I think there might be one in the Institute."
A smile creeps up my face as I realize that there are some things that never change. They have an Institute here and I guess that is the next place we have to go.