Deceiver: My attempt to make up for the last chapter.

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Where do babies come from?

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"Mama!"

"Hm?"

"Mama mamaaaaaaa!"

"What is it?"

"Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Hands falling onto her lap in defeat, Kido rolled her eyes and got up from folding the laundries and walked towards the playing room. Kano walked passed her just then, whistling a tune while he vacuumed the floor. She didn't pay any attention to him, just wanted to see what their children wanted.

"What is it?" she walked into the room to see Mika and Ayame sitting at the center of the room. The small blond boy was looking up at her quietly as his sister got up to take their mother's hand and make her sit down with them.

"Mama, I was wondering…" Mika began.

"What is it?"

"I was a baby like Ayame too, right?"

"Yes, you two have seen the baby photos last week, remember?"

"Yeah," the small girl blinked, grinning, "and I was such a cute baby."

"Onee-chan, the question," the small boy said. Despite being the youngest, Ayame sometimes acted more mature than his sister and kept her in line. It was either his timid side, or that he was acting like his mum.

"Oh, right right," Mika excused herself and went on. "So you went to the hospital to have me like you did with Ayame too, right, mama?"

"That's correct," Kido nodded.

"And I was in your belly like Ayame did?"

There was a pause. "Yes."

"Babies are always in mummies' bellies, right?"

"Uh huh. You've seen Aunt Mary with a big belly, remember that?"

"Yeah! I remember!" Mika nodded enthusiastically, Ayame following just quietly. After that, she stopped and frowned. "But…that's the thing…how?"

Kido blinked. "How what?"

"How do you get babies into a mummy's belly and out again?"

Kido stared at her daughter, her breathing completely stopped and eyes not blinking. They were waiting patiently, excluding the second when Mika waved her hand in front of her mother's eyes. After holding her breath for a full minute and her brain finally kicked back in, Kido doubled over, gasping and heaving in shock.

"Wh-What made you wonder that!?" she asked loudly, her face bright red as her kids stared obliviously at her.

"Dunno. Just thought it up," Mika answered simply. Before her mum could say anything, she jumped back to the topic. "Anyway, mama, tell us how you put us in your belly!"

This had to be the worst day ever. Kido had prayed that she would give them their sex education when they were ten years old at least or hoped their school would do the job for her. But no, she was bombard with this question from her six years old daughter and three year old son. She was not interested back then, heck she heard about it from Ayaka and twice in school! Why didn't they ask Kano? As much as she hated how he might explain, it was better than her doing it.

"Well," she drummed her fingers on the carpet, thinking fast. "There's…this…peach…" might as well pull up the old bullcrapping her way out of this and hope they would just believe it or drop the question in a few minutes. "This peach can only be found in the river by a mummy and daddy…"

"Oh! Like Momotarou!"

"Yes! But Momotarou was actually born too fast!" she forgot how much Ayame liked those stories she read to him at bed time. "But those peaches are smaller and are veeeeeeery hard to find. So when a mummy and a daddy finds one in a river, mummy has to eat it before a baby is born from it or it won't be theirs!" this seemed to be believable, since Mika now sat back down with Ayame, both listening attentively. "After mummy eats one, the baby stays inside mummy's tummy for a few months…"

"How long was I?" Mika and Ayame asked at the same time.

"More or less than nine months…except you, Ayame, you were born two months too early. Anyway, so with a baby in her belly, mummy has to look after herself with daddy…"

"And you get to hit papa a lot whenever he does anything silly!" Mika pipped up!

"Did that happen?" Ayame asked.

"Yeah, I saw mama hit papa whenever he gets silly when he gets close to her big belly. He always ask these questions…I don't remember, like will you be a boy or a girl…hey mama, how do you know when the baby is a boy or a girl?"

"I'll explain that later," she had no interest on telling the difference between male and female today too. "Anyway, the mummy and daddy then have to get ready for when the baby is born, making nice a nice bedroom and buying new clothes and toys, and after that, they go to the hospital and…and the doctors cut up mummy's belly and take the belly out!"

"Gyah!" the kids screamed, cringing and covering their eyes. Kido thought that was a bad way to finish the story, but how was she supposed to explain to them they came out between her legs, where they think it was for going to the toilet?

"That's not what papa said!"

Kido snapped her head at Ayame. "What?"

"Papa said he and mama has to love each other very very much before papa has to make mama moan a lot in bed!" Mika blurted out. "I don't understand what moaning is and why it has to be on the bed, but…mama? Mama, are you okay?"

Kido was completely silent, staring at her kids with wide eyes and a hard line on her lips. Her right brow was twitching dangerously, especially when they heard a distinct laughing somewhere in the house.

"Kano Shuuya!" and the kids watched their mother chase down their father, hearing the chaotic yelling and shouting, mixed with a bit of cackling, around the house. Huffing, Mika turned to her little brother, who still covered his eyes.

"I think she's lying too."

"Maybe," Ayame sat back up. "I don't think the cutting the belly open is true though…"

"Maybe the eating food part, but I think it's actually candy. Remember mama wouldn't let us east some candies and papa said we have to be older first?"

"How do you think they get the baby out then?"

"Poop them out?"

"Ew," Ayame scooted away from Mika. Shrugging, the girl declared, "I'm never having babies."

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Deceiver: Blame the Hetalia Where Do Babies Come From video with Papa!France explaining how babies are made.

And if anyone asks, my mum told me how they come out and I was not happy with the cutting part...and disturbed about her saying it directly to me about how natural birth works.