Chapter 24: Do A Little Dance…
A/N: I'm on a roll, let's roll let's roll! Am I dragging the story? XP
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The red Autobot's heels clicked as soon as Starscream and Thundercracker had left the apartment building. Making sure they had not flown back to retrieve any forgotten items, the tape deck revealed himself and leapt out from a pile of refuse in a red and yellow blur, shaking off a stray pipe hooked onto his head appendages. The plan was quite straightforward; Blaster was to slip into the Decepticon jet's room and acquire the unidentified parts in a marked shopping bag. If the seekers outing was short, the saboteur was to distract them by any means possible until Blaster had taken possession of the items, and maybe compensate for its lack of weight with something else. After all, there were too many packages and all of them were tightly sealed, ready to be shipped to Earth.
Despite the questionable neighbourhood, the tenants of the building were given separate key cards to gain enter the complex, but that did not stop Blaster from gaining easy access when he smooth talked his way using a group of young neutrals. After an exchange of niceties with revalatory information about the latest hits, Blaster exited the elevator, counting the doors lined down the hallway. To occupy his time waiting, the tape deck accommodated his half hour by counting and recounting the windows of the apartment, predetermining the room Starscream occupied with her fellow wingmates. But there was a catch, and if Blaster was not on this mission, he would have been humoured by the little pickle he was in.
A black hand opened the door to reveal the a purple and black seeker, spread over the sofa in a deep recharge from his energon escapades.
In front of all the crinkly shopping bags.
If this was Primus' idea of a joke, Blaster was not laughing.
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As aerial commander of the Decepticon army, Starscream demanded for a V.I.P. room in one of Cybertron's most popular nightclubs. A swing of the cape, a proud rasp of authority, and she easily blagged her way in, followed by a blue jet who felt pairless without his purple comrade's obnoxious presence. The red seeker would have it no other way. The ambience was either too noisy, too bright or too suffocating, anywhere and everywhere, but she fell victim to her own social needs.
'At least she's not obsessing about those shopping bags,' Thundercracker pondered. Her meticulous behaviour over her 'gifts' was more than he could bear, but the sudden laxity of keeping an over energised seeker to guard her precious spoils from a victorious shopping spree? A little strange, even for her eccentricity.
'As long as Starscream's happy, our audio processors are spared,' he thought, and proceeded down the stairs to the overpopulated dance floor. His superior considered herself more of an observer and cradled her energon drink in her hand, teasing the pink liquid in its cup. Tonight was all about her, and indulging herself. Forget the formalities, what has been done can worry about itself.
"Waiter, another drink."
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'Primus slaggit, he spoke again!' Blaster jolted in his frog position and slapped his mouth shut with his hands. The red and yellow Autobot had only crept a few inches forward when the seeker, perturbed in his dreams by his dream, swung a rebellious hand out of the boundaries of his sofa and almost clouted Blaster upside the head. Slamming his body to the floor to avoid the hit, Blaster accidentally hit the 'Play' button located on his chest and the vociferous melody of anarchy started blaring gregariously from his legs, wailing of freedom, peace and all that jazz.
'OH PRIMUS OH PRIMUSNONONONO!!!!!' Blaster fists rushed to his chest and quite literally punch himself to silence.
This was by far, the worst tape deck has ever done. Ever.
Maybe it was Skywarp's fault, who was hiding a some obscure ability; with his infinite aura of inanity, the seeker could somehow affect and disable the Transformers of their common sense…Blaster didn't know. What the Autobot did know as soon as his arms pushed himself off the ground, was Skywarp's head careening onto his own, stopping with a slight rap to his helmet. Having bizarre coincidences constantly stalking the seeker, Skywarp managed to hook his mouth onto Blaster's head gear in the process. Precariously dangling over the domed head and the sofa, the Decepticon warrior ran the risk of falling into the space between them, if…
…Skywarp found the tape deck's collar a convenient spot to hang his whole arm.
Blaster didn't want to turn his head. Then again, he had to, or else he wouldn't know what the blasted seeker got themselves into. A warm sensation slithered down the Autobot's helmet, and he carefully lifted a finger to touch the foreign liquid.
Astroseconds fly by. Skywarp's drool reaches the floor.
…'This not real, 'this not real, I'm in the Twilight Zone, it's a reality show, someone's playing a sick prank on me and they're filming it, I know it man, I know it. " 'S easy" he said. "Piece 'a upside down cake n' all," he said. Double Z, if you're fightin' off a whole army of Mega-goons right now, I hate you, I slaggin' hate you…
I wanna trade places.
"Ph-phiew-phiew-fihweeeeeeuuuuwwwwuh…" Skywarp muttered.
"…Kah-bloooohm! Bh-kow! …Uh-huh-huh…"
The WORST.
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Starscream giddily swiped her mouth with her whole arm, satisfied at her latest achievements. Chucking the emptied cup onto the table, the aerial commander grumbled to herself when it bounced off the other cups inhabiting the table and settled for the floor. Wanting to be vigilant about the number of drinks she consumed in fear of reaching Skywarp's quandary, Starscream stated to the waiter that the empty containers were to adamantly remain on the table. A few breems later, the same table grew a twin from the red jet's vision, dancing in-between her confused optics, and she lost count of the empty cups she drank from. This irritated her even more.
…She needed another drink. Thundercracker was not a drink, but the blue seeker approached her anyway.
"Starscream…what-" he side glanced the numerous cups. "…Er, you okay?"
The red seeker groggily looked up at her wing mate with a fixated grin, contentedly half-purring and chuckling at her own joke. Her blue hands ran in small circles on the lounge chair, convincing the aerial commander of her current body position, the surface she was resting on, and the correct directional pull of gravity.
"Of course I'm okay!" she chided at Thundercracker. "Self-medication's the best."
She whipped her head from the blue Decepticon standing dumbly in front of her to change her view. Musing to herself behind tinted windows, Starscream's hazy optics found sight of the other Transformers downstairs, grinding against each other in motion to the pulsations of the vibrant music. A broad arm nudged her own, but she continued to ignore Thundercracker, listening to the beat relentlessly banging from the outside. Only a ghost of the noise outside echoes into the private room, occupied by the two seekers, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder in the placid lighting.
"…Self medication. Huh…(what for)."
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'…All for…this!!!'
Blaster carefully hoisted the dull metal box out of the bag by the tips of his restless fingers. Scanning the contents once more, the tape deck mentally congratulated himself, taking note that the olive Transformer had most likely smuggled a few more items into the bag, leaving Starscream to pack it into an inconspicuous box and not lose any complicated pieces. This was all he needed. The vexing complexity of the mission disappeared once Blaster tucked the smallish box into his chest cavity. It fits perfectly.
"Heya."
Suddenly, all time stopped, commandeered by the voice of a lone seeker. Blaster could hear a few digits lazily scratching a newly repaired aft, the least of his concerns. Maybe Skywarp would not notice him if he stood rigidly still, and go back to recharge.
"Heya-(wuh)…"
And he's still overcharged?!
"Hey," A clumsy black finger tapped Blaster's shoulder. "Hey-"
Tap.
"Hey."
TAP.
"Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Heya. Hey. Hey. Heeeeeey………HEY."
If Skywarp continued prodding his back, Blaster knew that there would be a finger-shaped hole in due time.
Call his bluff.
"…There's no one here."
"…………………………………Really?"
"…Yeah. Jes' a wall, nothing else."
"No way-no-nooooo. I see you, I see you. You're red and yellow and white and yellow. And red. Autoboooooooooooooooot."
Blaster didn't want to be terminated facing a wall.
Ssh ssh…he can't see you, you can't see him-
"Hey, wanna play a drinking game? Y'know. One remph, two remph, poh-poh-poh. Everyone knows that game. Even kids can play it."
The tape deck felt a fist nudge him in a coaxing manner, almost begging. Blaster slowly rotated himself to face the mentally challenged seeker, who was patiently holding his fists out at shoulder length and looking bored.
Blaster raised his own hands in quiet apprehension.
"…Okay."
"…Cool. One remph."
"Two remph."
"Poh-poh-POH!"
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A/N: Will Blaster ever escape the Cybertronian drinking game of Death? Is Starscream as drunk as she seems? And will Thundercracker get his poon? Find out in the next chapter of-…….bleeeeeeeeeeeh XD I think they've stayed on Cybertron for too long 8.
