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Chapter Twenty Five
"What do you want me to tell you Kate?" Castle had asked after a long silence. They had been on the couch, after a dinner together, just them.
Alexis had left, like she said she would. To a friend's house up state, and Martha.. well.. Kate knew the older woman was ashamed of herself, and had slipped out unnoticed. But now as his sharp blue eyes looked down at her, fingers in her hair, Martha walked in, freezing in the middle of the kitchen.
Castle's hand stopped briefly as he looked over at his mother, eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth, as if to prove an even greater point. "They met one night, they had sex, she got pregnant," His voice was harsh, and Kate heard Martha gasp and then the sound of the older woman's heels clicking across the floor as she tried to flee the scene.
"Rick." Kate scolded, pulling away from him and sitting up on the couch, "Martha, wait." She called to the redhead, whose retreating back paused on the steps. But she didn't turn around.
Castle sighed, his fists clenching at his sides and he went to get up from the couch. But Kate grabbed his hand, lacing her fingers through his as she looked up at him, "Go get some air... clear your head." She told him softly, squeezing his hand.
He said nothing, looking into the deep green eyes of Kate, before narrowing them and throwing a look to his mother who had come back down the stairs, and was pouring herself a glass of wine.
Kate squeezed his hand again, and he finally nodded, bending down and kissing her on the forehead before grabbing his jacket and leaving without another word.
"I don't blame him... the way he's acting." Martha said when Kate adjusted herself on the couch, arm over the back as she watched his mother make her way to her. "It's no more than I deserve."
Kate shook her head, "You don't deserve it... we can't help who we fall in love with." She said softly, truthfully as she thought to the man who was walking sullenly down the streets of New York.
And just like she knew Martha didn't deep down, Kate did not regret the choice her heart made.
Martha nodded her head, lips pursing for a moment as she clapped a hand over one of Kate's and looked into her eyes with the wisdom Kate always knew she possessed. "I loved a lifetime the night I met him."
It sounded like a tragic love story, Kate thought, as she entered her apartment after a long day at work. She had decided, that maybe it wasn't safe to keep showing up at his place.. that tonight, they would just have to bare it apart.
They would meet up tomorrow at the aquarium. Both agreeing as they stole just a little more time together, Kate hugging him tightly to her, and trying to convince him to not be so upset with his mother. He seemed a bit better as she kissed him goodbye outside the elevator before it took her to the ground floor.
And he held onto her until the very last minute, arms stretched through the elevator doors before they closed, and he was forced to let her go.
Kate flexed her hand, still feeling his palm flat against hers.
But now, as she turned on all her lights, walking into her room and flicking on the one in her bedroom, Kate thought of a younger Martha. An aspiring actress who met Alexander at the plaza.
And it didn't really matter about the details. Only that, they were two strangers who connected, and fell in love in one night.
And he couldn't stay.
A naive nineteen year old Martha had been swept from her feet by a man who could not give her a reason. She had no idea who he was... never learned his last name and never saw him again after that night.
Nine months later...Richard Alexander Rogers was born.
And the only thing she regretted, for she would never regret the gift that one night brought her, was that her recklessness had caused her son so much pain.
Kate set her tea on the sink, turning and taking in the mess she had made the day before. It seemed more of a disaster zone now than it did yesterday. Water stains shone on the wall behind the mirror, which was splattered with dried droplets. And the floor, along with the sink, was littered with various orange medication bottles, and pills.
It made her feel like a mental patient, a science experiment, and she wanted to scream, shaking fingers locking around a capsule, while her other hand pushed into her hair, nails nearly scratching at the incisions she now knew was made to further confuse her mind. It made her skin crawl. Like they were still inside her head, waiting, and that any moment, something more than this pill in her hand could blow it all away.
She couldn't stand the sight of them... let alone feel them in her fingers as she started to collect them. Each one was deadly, each tiny pill, not sure which ones, were laced with a killer.
And she collected them as quickly as she could, popping them back into the bottles, and then throwing them into the kitchen trash. And Kate stood there, hand on her hip while her teeth clamped down on a fingernail, staring... just staring at the trash that held the end of her world.
It wasn't enough.
She didn't want them in her home...and she swept the trash bag right out of the bin, tying it up with attentive fingers until not even she herself could untie it.
New York City was cold that evening, the approaching winter tugging at her coat as she stood out on the sidewalk, pushing the trash bag into the dumpster. She could barely hear the static of the flimsy bag over the rushing wind and the cars that sped by her.
She felt as though every single one of them was watching her... and she wondered, as she looked off down the sidewalk, the wind gathering up her hair and biting at her cheeks, if he had eyes all over the city.
Wouldn't be much of a surprise...
But was she being watched now?
Did Alexander have reason to doubt her?
As far as he was concerned, Kate still didn't remember. And despite her lack of understanding of the behavior of her fellow detectives, somehow she knew they would not... what?
Report her?
Hand her over?
No... they wouldn't... and she could see that today, the look of horror cross both their faces when they realized where she was going.
Thinking about it now, as she turned back to her building, the look on their faces the utter despair and apology in their eyes was enough to tell her, that they were as trapped as she was.
Kate re-entered her apartment with new sentiment. They may not have a choice, but she did know, that with little encouragement, they would help her take back what was hers.
It was just before closing, and the tunnels seemed murkier than in the daytime, the florescence's of the lights cast more of a dark blue reflection on the floors. Illuminating and flickering off the aquatic life, and casting shadows amongst the ocean plants.
And it was quiet.
Silent over the hum of the filters and the flowing sea water within the tanks. It would be calming any other day, but she felt uneasy, her feet moving without sound, careful steps leading her down the tunnel.
But then something made her go for her gun, hand moving slowly to wrap around the handle at her hip. There was a disturbance in the tank to her right, and she pulled her piece from her hip holster, the weapon hugged tightly and protectively out in front of her as she continued to step cautiously.
Every now and then her eyes would dart to the glass on all sides of her, a school of fish speeding by giving her intel.
"Kate!" The sound of her name shattered through the air, reverberating in the tunnels and scattering the fish.
Her feet started running, legs propelling her down the long stretch of tunnels, her momentum echoing all around her as a scream gripped at her chest. And another followed right after, blood curdling despair for Kate.
Picking up her pace she rounded a corner until she found the source of such terror. But it was too late.
She was grabbed from behind, strong arms of her attacker wrapping around her middle and lifting her off the ground, trying to carry her out of the tunnels as she screamed and thrashed in their arms. Kicking and twisting in his grasp as Castle tried to break free from his own threat.
"Put. The Detective. Down!" Jordan Shaw's voice rang out, above everyone else, and the tunnels finally hushed into silence.
The attackers let Kate on her feet, but didn't let go, as Castle flung his arms out of the other man's grasp, both looking to Jordan with deflating relief, sagging where they stood.
"FBI! Let them go, you're surrounded." One of Jordan's men yelled, pointing his gun at Kate's assailant.
The tunnels filled with agents, encompassing them in a cocoon of protection, and they released Kate, who ran to Castle, flying into his waiting arms, as they crumbled to the floor.
"Sorry, I couldn't get here sooner." Jordan said, pushing her gun into the holster as her team handcuffed the men and led them out.
"Better late than never." Castle replied as he held Kate to his chest, refusing to let her go.