All characters belong to JKR
Chapter 25: Realizations:
Draco looked over at Hermione as they stood on the boardwalk, at almost midnight, on the night of her thirtieth birthday. He placed his arm around her shoulder and gently pulled her closer. She sagged against him. He tenderly turned her so that she faced him. All evening, she had an air of sadness surrounding her, and he didn't know why, but it bothered him.
"Was it all you wanted it to be?" he asked.
"Of course," she said, not impressively. He kissed her forehead.
"Just you and me now, my birthday girl," he whispered. "Are you ready for your present?"
"You've given me enough," she said. "The wonderful day yesterday, the trip to the cathedral today, and then tonight, with dinner and dancing and the roses up in your suite, well, really, it was all rather nice."
"Nice?" he repeated. He wasn't really prepared for that response. Nice was bland and blasé, two things neither of them were in the least. He thought, 'I'll give her nice.'
He lowered his face to hers, and his mouth began to press upon hers. The hardness of his chest pressed into her body, as his hands caressed up and down her back. She tilted her head upward, to receive him more readily, and though she was an active participant, he continued to feel that she was vacant, and not completely there.
She trembled and he stopped kissing her long enough to walk her over to a blanket he had already set up in the sand. They both sat down, he slipped his hand down her leg, then up to her thigh, moved to his back, with her on top, and he placed one hand on her bum and one on her back. Her breath came out as a ragged burst, and he stopped for a moment to turn them around, so that she was on her back, and he loomed over her.
He could see the fabric of her dress pressed tightly over her breasts, and he wanted her more than he had ever wanted anyone or anything in his entire life. He didn't just want her physically. It was more. It was monumentally more. He wanted to make Hermione Granger his own. That was one reason he kept referring to her as 'my'…my Granger, my birthday girl, my, my, my. In simple terms, he wanted to marry her, but there was plenty of time for that. He would wait until she was ready.
He deepened the kiss when he thought about her becoming his wife, and his hand slipped inside the slit of her dress, and traveled back up her thigh. He finally relented, stopped kissing her and he said, "Do you want to read the note now?"
She looked up at him and shook her head no. He scowled. He sat up and said, "I really think you should read it. It's part of your birthday present." He was already slightly ticked off because she shook her head no. Why wouldn't she want to read the note? She claimed she wanted to read it, she even stole it from his room earlier, but after she arrived for dinner, she handed it back to him and said that she hadn't read it yet, and she would wait to read it when he was ready for her to do so.
Well, he was ready, and now she wasn't. She confused him to no end. He was falling in love with the bloody bint, and she vexed him more than he could imagine. Her birthday was almost over, all she had to do now was to read the note, and it would be complete. He felt it all went rather well, except for one small thing…she seemed sad.
He sat back up and so did she. Neither said another word about the note. He knew it was still safely inside his coat pocket, where he placed it when she handed it to him after she arrived in his room. He took a fleeting glance back toward her, then took his index finger and moved it up and down her upper arm. She turned her gaze from the ocean to him and she sighed.
"Another year older," she mused.
"And yet, you don't look a day over thirty," he joked. She gave him a weak smile. "What's wrong, Hermione? Are you sad that the day's almost over, or are you sad that you're getting older, or has something I've said or done upset you? Did I not show you a nice birthday?" He thought he sounded slightly pitiful and pathetic, asking for affirmations, but he seriously wanted to know if he had been remiss. If he had done something wrong, he wanted to know. He leaned over and kissed her bare shoulder.
He suddenly felt insecure. His entire life he acted cocky and self-assured on the outside, while facing all sorts of demons regarding insecurities on the inside, and he hated that. He thought things would be different now that he was older. He thought things would be different with her, but he realized that he was still just an insecure person wrapped up in the trappings of a world-class prick. Such was his life. Perhaps she was also facing some demons. He would have to find out.
"Really, my Granger, if I did something wrong, or if I forgot something, tell me. If you're worried about something, or upset, I want to know. Your birthday isn't over yet. We can still make it perfect. We have," he looked at his watch, "Fourteen more minutes."
She turned to him and then to his surprise she cupped his cheek and said, "Why don't you want to marry me?"
Earlier in the evening:
Hermione picked up the note from Draco's coffee table, and rushed down to her room, after making a comment about how rude Draco was being. She opened the door to her suite, then slammed the door shut, and threw the note on the couch. She paced back and forth, and was about to announce to the empty room just how rude he was being again, when she stopped.
He wasn't being rude. He was being sweet. He was right! She was the rude one! She was acting out of character and she was ashamed. He was so very right, as much as she hated to admit it. He was even right when he called her a 'harpy'. As much as she abhorred the word, 'harpy', a harpy described her to a T.
Why was she acting like this? Even she didn't have an answer for her actions. She walked to her bedroom, opened her closet to find something to wear tonight, when she realized she didn't have another dress to wear. She had already worn the dress he had bought her for their blind date. The dress she had brought with her was the one she had worn to the cathedral earlier, so she couldn't wear it again. Still, she took it off the hanger and stared at it.
She examined it for a while longer and then she came to such a startling realization that it almost blindsided her. The real reason she wore such a fancy dress on their outing was on the off chance that he might 'force' her to marry him today. She sat on the edge of the bed, with the dress bunched in her hands, and it pained her to admit that fact, but it remained a fact, nonetheless.
She wore this pretty, cream coloured dress earlier, anticipating that he might force the issue of a wedding as a way to solve their problem, which meant one thing and one thing only: she wanted to marry Draco Malfoy! She'd dressed earlier for a wedding that she claimed she didn't want. She dressed for a wedding in which she threw a fit about because it might happen, even though deep inside she wanted it to happen!
Upon closer examination, she saw just how stupid she had been. She threw the dress on the floor, stood up and said aloud, "I want to marry Draco Malfoy!" She rushed to the outer room, ran to the sofa, and picked up the small piece of parchment, still neatly folded in a small triangle.
She wanted to read it, but she wanted to respect his wishes, too. If it was a wedding proposal, she didn't want to spoil anything this time. She picked up her purse and ran down the hall to the lifts. She didn't have much time, and she had so much to do!
She went to the boutique where they had bought her dress for the blind date. She found the perfect dress for tonight. It wasn't overstated, yet it could serve as a 'birthday-slash-wedding dress' just fine.
It was a shimmering silver/grey colour, satin, small straps across the shoulder, tight across the bodice, tight across the hips, with a slit up the side. She bought shoes, a clutch purse, and some long, chandelier earrings. She ran back toward the hotel, chanting in her head, "I want to marry Draco," repeatedly.
What was wrong with her? She wanted to marry a man she had just become reacquainted with a week ago! Forget the fact that they grew up together, because the fact that they hated each other in school negated the other fact that she hardly knew the man. She was still an idiot! She wanted to marry him and she knew it was a rash, impulsive decision, but she hardly cared.
She really was an idiot. She was an idiot to sign a contract without reading it, she was an idiot to throw a fit about a possible wedding today, and she was a rude idiot when she went up to his room earlier. She was an idiot in love, and that was all that mattered. She ran back to the resort with her new dress tucked tightly under her arm.
When she reached the massive resort, she looked up at it and realized it looked magnificent with the backdrop of the setting sun, which threw gold and pink rays of light over the entire structure. She would always have fond memories of this place. This was the place where she fell in love. This would be the place where she would get married. She continued toward the portico with a smile on her face, and finally she really did feel like a new woman. She was misguided in thinking that a new job, a new house, and new clothes could make her a new Hermione. That was a lie. That was the old Hermione wrapped in a façade, with a dollop of pretense on top!
Well, the old Hermione was finally gone, the new one was now center stage, and she liked this new woman very much. She was glad she took the reins and didn't let the old Hermione spoil things for her. She skipped up the stairs of the grand hotel, spied Mr. and Mrs. Johnson, sharing a chaise lounge, sipping after dinner drinks, and she waved at them.
She thought they looked sublimely happy, and she envied them, wondering if she and Draco would come here to celebrate their anniversary every year. She hoped so.
Stepping onto the lifts, she came to yet another realization. This whole act of reinventing and reinvigorating herself was really just her way of waiting for something good to happen, without appearing to wait for whatever it was that was lacking in her life. She was waiting for a companion, a soul mate, a worthy adversary, a lover and a best friend. A husband and a father for her children. Merlin help her, she was waiting for Draco.
He said he would give her anything she wanted for her birthday, and by golly, she wanted him for her birthday.
She went up to her room and quickly changed into her new outfit. She fixed her hair and makeup and then ran to the doors to the penthouse suite. Before knocking, she straightened her dress, smoothed down her hair, opened her clutch to make sure the note was inside, and then smiled. She was about to knock on the door, when instead, she opened her purse again. She pulled out the little triangle piece of parchment, already certain of what it would say, but still she opened it to read it.
She read it twice. She swallowed hard, mouth dry, hands shaking. She was crushed at what she read. This was not what she expected. Was it a solution to their dating dilemma? Certainly. Was it something she would consider accepting? Probably. Was it what she wanted in her heart of hearts? No way. Realization of another form set in as she began to acknowledge that Draco Malfoy wasn't proposing marriage at all.
Because nowhere on the little piece of parchment was a marriage proposal. There wasn't even anything resembling a marriage proposal on the blasted thing. She didn't know what to do, she felt numb. She should have let him trick her into marrying him this afternoon, as he planned. Apparently, this note was plan 'b', to be used only if she wouldn't go along with marriage. That was why he gave it to her, because he thought she didn't want to get married.
As mentioned earlier. Hermione Granger was an idiot.
The smile faded from her face, and she was on the verge of turning away from his room to leave, when the door opened.
"Hey, I was wondering where you were. You're late. I was just going down to your room to check on you," he said with a smile.
She smiled back, and put her hands behind her back. She managed to open the small, clutch purse behind her back, and stuffed the note inside. He stood in front of her in a dark silver suit, with a navy tie, and she realized that the matched again. For some reason, that made her even sadder. He leaned forward and said, "Happy Birthday, my darling Granger," and with that said, he kissed her cheek, held the door open, and she walked into the suite.
A/N 1: I had this chapter ready two days ago, but this site had some troubles, so I couldn't post it until now. Now, I know that it seems this is going in circles, and I know that some people are becoming weary of it, and that always seems to happen with stories, but I don't want to rush it. I have a plan and I want to stick to it. My story arch makes sense, at least to me. I understand when readers get frustrated, and they want a story to move on and sometimes even to end, but I don't want to rush it just because readers are frustrated. I did that with the story, "A Second Chance" and then I ended up not liking how it ended, because I hurried up and finished it because people were becoming frustrated.
So, please, stick with things. Yes, the story might not be a barrel of laughs right now, but it's basically a romantic story, with humour, not the other way around. It's not angst riddled at all, and it will still have some humour. The story will cover her birthday dinner, the night after, and then a few days after they get back to work, before it wraps up. Thanks!