**** Disclaimer: I do NOT own the recognizable events, characters, or places in this story. Characters and events, as well as the Twiverse, belong to Stephanie Meyer. Forks, Port Angeles, and other real places belong to themselves, their own entities. ****
Bella awoke the next morning at and ungodly hour with a resolve she didn't even know she had. Her dreams had been filled with the wolves, as usual since her attack in September, worse since that weird week before the New Year's party… Those dreams, the wolves within them- there was only one answer she could think of when she thought about it.
Sam, Jared, Paul, Embry, all of them- possibly even Jacob now. They all had to be the wolves of legend- the wolves in her dreams. The Great Wolf had spoken to her again in her dreams, reminding her of her choice. Reminding her that she had already chosen, that she needed to prove her choice.
She almost growled at the total bullshit. If she had already chosen then why, or how, did she prove it?!
Then it hit her. Victoria. With Victoria coming hard and fast, and most likely soon for her- she knew what she could do. What she could show them, prove to them, that she had chosen them.
She needed paper, a pen, and envelopes. She had letters to write.
Bella wrote three letters; one for Jacob, one for her father, and one for Sam and his pack. She brought all of them with her to the Res- thanking every deity possible that Tiffany Call had accepted her lame excuse of needing a ride because her truck had died.
Thankfully Tiffany hadn't decided to question why Charlie would be coming later to 'pick her up,' as the lie she had told had said.
As much as she hated lying- right now it was needed.
The Black house looked empty as she walked up to it, the day was dreary and raining, cold but not freezing in intensity. She left the letters for on Billy's porch in the usual 'drop of spot' before turning to leave, running her hand along the bannister of the porch before she walked away. Bella hoped that Jacob would read his, and tell his father, before he hauled off and gave Charlie his letter.
If they ever gave Charlie his letter.
Bella walked through the Res, smiling and greeting those she saw and knew. She wasn't surprised when she didn't see any of Sam's little group in town. If they didn't want her around, which had become obvious, they wouldn't come to see her- would they?
Slipping away onto a trail used mostly by the same boys, or men she supposed, that she was trying to run from. It led up a partially steep incline along the cliffs and shore, she could hear the waves crashing against the face and rocks below her. The smell of the salty air made things much more tense, much more foreboding, it solidified the reality of what she was about to do.
The choice she was making for the wolves.
Bella continued her climb to the top, holding her arms tightly against her sides to hold the thin hoodie she was wearing closer to her already freezing body. The trees brushed against her; the ferns a made a soft 'shushing' noise as they brushed and held her pants as she passed. Bella didn't mind the silence, it made her choice that much more comfortable to live with.
As she climbed she could hear the Great Wolf speaking to her again, his voice ever present in her mind since the day before- a haunting reminder of her latest, and final, rejection.
"You are dooming your Pack, young one." His echoing voice resounding through her ears, drowning out even the water below. "They need you."
"If they needed me," Bella paused her statement to climb over a fallen branch the size of a small tree, grunting lightly with her efforts. "Then they wouldn't have abandoned me. I chose, they didn't."
"How do you know, Daughter?" The chiding voice was stern. "Have you asked them?"
"It should have been obvious- Great One." Bella replied to the air, anyone seeing her would have thought she was crazy. "I've been here. I came back, I tried to become an asset in the only way I knew how- I helped. I loved."
"But did you do it knowingly? Or were you satisfying a hole in your very being you couldn't place?" The Great Wolf almost laughed in her mind, a sort of gasping laugh that would come from the throat of a wolf.
"Does it matter?" Bella snapped as she finally saw the top of the cliff face.
"It does to them."
"Well, then this should truly show them my love for them- for this tribe. For a people that I never knew I needed." Bella's soft voice held so much sadness as tears threatened to spill from her dark brown eyes, she closed them and took a shudderingly deep breath. "I won't let them sacrifice themselves or get hurt for me- I am nothing special. This is their home, their land, their people. The wolves… Jacob, Sam, Paul, Embry, Jared… they deserve their home. They deserve to be safe."
"So do you, Daughter." The Great One suddenly appeared before her as she stood on the precipice of the cliff, his form shadowy and ethereal- but when Bella reached out to touch him- full solid. His tangibly intangibility an impossibility- yet she knew this to be just as real as that place of darkness and the Venom that lies within.
"You said all I had to do was call on the strength of the Pack, of my wolves, right?" Bella asked as she gently pet the nose and the great and ancient wolf in front of her. "To stop the Venom, all I needed was their strength, right?"
"Yes, their strength will keep the Venom at bay- it cannot control something it cannot kill." The Great One's eyes were filled with the same sadness in Bella's eyes- only centuries more of it. He had seen more heartbreak than she, yet he wore the grief well and it fueled his wisdom.
"Even till death?"
"Until death and Beyond- dear Warrior." The Great Wolf gave a whine, bumping his nose against the cold and fragile girl in front of him. "You need not do this, Warrior, you truly can protect them in another way. A greater way."
"What greater way than ensuring that their people are not needlessly slaughtered for the sake of a supposed soul-mate?" Bella replied idly as she walked forward from the trees, the wolf stepping in beside her, waiting. "They, the wolves, have done so much for me already. Whether they know it or not- they have. Ever since that night when I should have died in the forest. They saved my life- it is only right that I give it back to save theirs."
"Your life has so much more meaning to it than this, Daughter!" The wolf had stopped the gentle approach now, his voice rough and grating as it rose in volume to what should have hurt. It tilted its great nose to the sky and gave a long and lamenting howl to the grey sky, a storm quickly approaching. The waves became choppier below, their retreating mass like welcoming tendrils that called to Bella as she watched them reach forward and pull away. "Think of your connection to the Pack- of their ability to come to you in the In Between where your very Spirit lies! That is not achievable without great sacrifice on all sides. You cannot say now that you truly believe they don't want you- they don't need you. Your wolf needs you, would die for you, will die without you."
"My wolf…" Bella's laugh was cynical and harsh, such a rough sound to come from so small a woman. "If he truly wanted me… if he was truly mine… he would have tried. He would have…" Bella began to sob as she knelt on the edge of the cliff, about four inches between her knees and the opening to the great dark water below. "He wouldn't have abandoned me. He wouldn't… He wouldn't…"
Her shaking body was so wracked with pain that the Great One nuzzled her shoulder with his snout in a rare show of affection from the ancient one. She looked at him and clutched his head in a great hug, warmth and the feeling of home spread through her for a moment before she gathered the strength to stand. The wolf followed her with his eyes as she backed up a few steps and removed her hoodie, laying it gently on the grass.
"I wouldn't be alone, if he was my wolf." Was the last thing Bella said before she launched herself forward, the Great One did nothing more than lower his head with a piteous whining cry before he disappeared. "Goodbye, wolves. I love all of you."
With the final step, just as she proclaimed her love to the wolves she was now dying to protect- Bella jumped from the cliff. The last sound she heard above the roaring of the water below and the air rushing past was the sound of multiple tormented howls- a haunting melody to add to the already macabre moment.
And then her body hit the tumultuous surf, and Bella quit fighting.
She had chosen their lives, in place of hers.
And it felt right, even as her air ran out.
A/N: Yes, I know, I am so evil right now. I get it (and will probably get a few not-so-happy PMs about how I left this chapter)! I love all of my readers and I am sorry for how I am choosing to leave this right now- but this is the best place to leave off for many reasons.
Thank you to all of my readers, reviewers, and messengers! You all are amazing and make writing (though I do it for myself, really) so interesting with your views and opinions. I am truly blessed to have you guys!
Love you all of you, from author to reader!