The Normandy emerged from the Omega 4 relay. Joker let out a sigh of relief. "We are officially out of the danger zone. Where to now?"

"The Citadel," replied Shepard. "As soon as we reach the nebula, rendezvous with the Defiant and contact Dr. Bashir." She turned and headed towards the CIC.

"Should be about twenty minutes or so," Joker called after her, "unless traffic suddenly gets a lot worse."

Shepard nodded without stopping. "EDI, I want the Defiant's crew in the CIC at their earliest convenience."

"Understood. Would you like me to gather the Normandy's crew as well?"

Shepard stopped in front of the Normandy schematic. "They don't have to be here, but let them know we're meeting."

As the last of the group filtered in, Shepard folded her arms. "Do we have everyone?"

Sisko nodded. In addition to his crew members, Miranda, Garrus, Tali, Samara, and Legion were also present.

"We need to figure some things out. We could have better prepared for the collector attack if we'd planned ahead. Captain, if it's all right with you, I'd like to ask Nog some questions."

"I agree, Commander. Your crew's abduction was preventable. I don't want to see another disaster."

Nog raised a finger. "Commander, I'll tell you everything I can remember, but I only memorized the Mass Effect 2 stuff. I skimmed the sequel's plot, but I'll need to look at the computer on the Defiant before I can give you anything really useful."

Miranda shook her head. "I'm not sure this is a great idea, Commander. The more they tell you, the more we diverge from the recorded story, and the less useful that information will be."

Shepard replied "Miranda, I'm not going to ignore information that could save lives."

Miranda's eyes narrowed. "If we lose the war, the lives won't matter."

Shepard looked her XO in the eye. "I had this conversation with your former boss right before we went through the relay. The loss of an advantage we were never supposed to have in the first place is not going to cost us the war."

"You can't know that. Any deviation from the established chain of events could convert a certain success into a probable failure."

In a bright flash of light, a tall, Caucasian man wearing a Starfleet captain's uniform appeared between Shepard and Miranda. "It's a bit late to worry about that."

Sisko and Dax exchanged a glance. "What do you want, Q?" asked Sisko.

Q raised an eyebrow. "That's exactly how Picard used to greet me. Did Starfleet release some memo telling everyone to be as rude as possible to their betters?"

Shepard cleared her throat. "I'm sorry, but-" she began, intending to ask for identification.

Q waved her away. "Apology accepted."

One of Legion's eyebrow-plates twitched. "We do not believe Shepard-Commander intended an apology."

Q eyed the geth. "Now this is what a proper robot should look like. None of the uncanny-valley schtick Data had going. Just as annoying as the original, though."

"Do not speak ill of my former crewmates," warned Worf.

"We do not view ourselves as analogous to Lt. Commander Data," added Legion.

"Really? Why not?" asked Q.

"We do not desire humanity."

Q grinned. "And it's smarter than Data, too." His face took on a serious demeanor and he turned to Sisko. "But that's not why I'm here."

"Oh?" asked Sisko.

"Don't tell your mother I said this, but her mumbo jumbo is completely useless, in case you haven't noticed. I'm here to clear a few things up. Well, technically I'm not supposed to be here at all, but I won't say anything if you don't."

Kira frowned. "What do you mean, you're 'not supposed' to be here?"

"We have an agreement. Officially, I'm supervising their multiverse work. The so-called 'Prophets' have been banned by the Continuum from doing anything with parallel universes on their own. Unofficially, watching you people fumble around in the dark was fun for a while, but now it's become tedious."

She glared at him. "How dare you tell the Prophets what to do?"

Q clasped his hands behind his back. "Because last time they tried something like this, they created a pocket universe inside our universe, which you people helpfully carried through the wormhole twice. We eventually had to bud the whole thing off into a child universe. Took a fair chunk of local space-time with it, too. So this time, I'm playing chaperone. Unless you'd like to see another almostcalypse, Major?"

"So you're omnipotent?" asked Shepard. "Can you kill the reapers?"

"This is not my domain," explained Q. He reached for a control panel and his hand phased through. "Even if I could, removing the reapers would defeat the purpose of the exercise."

"Exercise?" repeated Tali. "Is this all some kind of game to you?"

"To him, everything is a game," replied Worf.

"Does that mean none of this is real?" asked Sisko.

"Reality... is relative," offered Q.

"That's a yes," translated Garak, but Q shook his head.

"No, I mean you mortals are too simple-minded to understand, and the word 'real' is entirely too vague anyway."

"Are we all experiencing the same events?" asked Legion.

Q nodded.

"Will that state of affairs end?"

Q smirked. "Definitely smarter than Data. No, the last line of this story will not be 'Computer, end program.'" He gave Sisko a meaningful look. "So don't screw it up."

Silence.

"If you're not physically there, what are you standing on?" asked Miranda.

"Nothing." Q momentarily floated a few centimeters off the floor. "I don't need a ship, or air, or anything. But it's a lot easier to talk to you mortals in habitable environments than elsewhere."

The elevator door opened and Grunt stepped out. His eyes widened. "You!" he shouted, pointing at Q. "I told you he was real, Shepard."

Shepard clenched a fist briefly, and turned to Q. In a cold voice, she asked "Did you-?"

"I'm entirely innocent," lied Q.

"Really." Shepard continued to glare.

"I merely provided him with information. True information, at that."

"Speaking the truth does not absolve one of responsibility for the results," remarked Samara. "We must weigh all the possible consequences of our actions with care. It would have been wiser to contact Wrex."

"Q's not big on thinking ahead," explained Dax.

Q scoffed. "Oh, please. I knew exactly what was going to happen. And, just as I expected, it was hilarious."

Shepard sighed. "For future reference, my crew are not here for your personal entertainment. Got it?"

"Or what, you'll thrash me?" asked Q.

"Hey, it worked when Benjamin tried it," Dax joked.

Q responded by waving his hand through the panel again, then smirked and vanished.

"Hey, Shepard, we need you up here," called Joker. Shepard turned and headed for the cockpit.

Garrus strained to remember some of the details of Star Trek Kaidan had discussed with him. "Don't... doesn't Starfleet have a rule about sharing tech with less developed societies?"

Worf shook his head. "The Prime Directive does not apply to parallel universes."

Miranda frowned. "That's an awfully convenient loophole."

"Parallel universes do not matter. The Prime Directive exists to protect our universe."

"So you don't care about defeating the reapers at all? You just want a ticket home?"

"Yes."

Sisko held up his hands. "Thank you, Mr. Worf, but I'm going to overrule you there. This world is not a simple variation on ours. Its loss would be a tragedy." He inhaled. "On the other hand, I must do what's best for my crew, just as you and Shepard do what's best for yours. Right now, it looks like those two interests align. I can't promise anything if they come into conflict."

"Fair enough," conceded Miranda.

"Joker, what's the hold-up?" asked Shepard, stepping into the cockpit. The violet Serpent Nebula was visible through the windows.

"Citadel Defense wants to arrest us," replied the pilot.

"What?"

"They said they're searching every Cerberus vessel in Council space. Here, I've got them on the comm." He un-muted the channel.

"Commander Shepard, Special Tactics and Recon," she announced.

"Yes, we know who you are," replied a gruff turian voice. "Commander, we're taking you and your vessel into custody."

"On what charges?" she asked.

"You are not being charged with anything, so far as I'm aware. The Council wants to ask you some questions."

"What kind of questions?"

The voice sounded annoyed. "That's above my pay grade. Now, are we doing this the easy way or the hard way?"

Shepard hesitated. "Citadel Defense has no authority to detain spectres."

"You're not a spectre, at least for the moment. The Council suspended you a few hours ago."

Shepard sighed. "Then I'd better go talk to them."

"Good. Dock at C-Sec Academy. I believe your pilot is acquainted with the bay. Forwarding docking clearance now."

Joker received the information in a window on his HUD. He opened another window and typed IES still cooling down. Can do up to 10 min. silent running.

EDI added This would push safety limits, but is feasible if absolutely necessary.

Shepard shook her head. "We've received your docking instructions. Proceeding to bay. Normandy out."

Joker closed the channel. "So, another round of you telling the Council everything and them believing nothing? Why bother?"

Shepard closed her eyes. "Thane. We would never get him adequate care in the Terminus Systems, and there's nowhere else to run."

Joker frowned. "Think they'll let us do anything with the Defiant?"

"No. We'll have to put him somewhere on the Citadel and figure something out. Which reminds me: EDI, tell C-Sec about Thane."

"Acknowledged," replied the AI. "They will have a medical team ready. I've also informed Doctors Solus and Chakwas to prepare for patient transfer."