A/N: Hi guys! ^^ I'm soooooo sorry for neglecting this story for so many months. What can I say? Life has been crazy! No beyond that! I know it's a lousy excuse, but there you have it. I've been dealing with so much that I just couldn't find the time or the energy to write. And when I tried I always seemed to get stuck or delete the entire chapter because I wasn't satisfied. I'm not sure I'm completely happy with it now, but at least I managed to finish it. It took me a while to get back into it. But I promised you all that I wouldn't abandon this story and I will keep my promise. I love it far too much to leave it unfinished. There are so many great things to come that I just can't wait to write! I want to thank all of my readers for putting up with me and for all the lovely reviews and messages you all send me. I appreciate it soo much! You guys are the best! I hope you all love this chapter! Enjoy and I'll see you on the other side! ^^
Disclaimer: SM owns it all!
POV'S: Alice, Bella, Edward.
Alice's POV.
'' Ohayõ, Tokyo! '' I exclaimed with a big smile and my arms wide open, ready to embrace the entire city. The day was beautifully cloudy just as I had predicted and the air was hot and humid. In short, a perfect day for shopping and sight-seeing. I had missed Japan. It had been years since I had last been here.
I heard the others chuckle behind me and I turned to face them with a smile so big it nearly split my face in two.
'' Beautiful, wonderful, sensational Japan! '' I sang, unable to contain my excitement. '' I have missed you! ''
'' You've been here before? '' Bella asked, surprised.
'' Of course I have, Bella, '' I laughed. '' Culture, beautiful nature and most importantly amazing fashion! What's not to love? '' I meant it as a rhetorical question, but Bella answered it anyway.
'' The weather? '' she suggested. She made a show of wiping her forehead and blowing the air out of her cheeks.
'' You'll get used to that, '' I said dismissively with a wave of my hand. '' We're lucky that it's such a perfect cloudy day. ''
'' Lucky? '' Bella scoffed with a roll of her eyes. '' You planned this trip, fortune cookie. ''
The others laughed and Edward was wearing his I-adore-Bella-more-than-anything-else-in-the-universe face.
'' Ha-ha, '' I said in a voice dripping with sarcasm. '' You'd all be helpless without this fortune cookie. Not to mention walking around in ludicrous and abhorrent clothes. Speaking of clothes – let's get cracking! ''
'' I'm not wearing a kimono! '' Bella called, slouching after me along with the others. '' You can't make me! ''
I looked over my shoulder and grinned at her. '' I'm not going to, '' I said with a smirk. '' I have something different in mind. ''
Bella's eyes widened and the color drained from her face. Honestly!
'' And what is that exactly? '' she asked, hesitantly. You'd think I'd let her walk around in rags!
'' You'll see, '' I sang, linking arms with Jasper. He smiled at me and planted a kiss on my forehead.
'' You boys need to go and find something else to do, '' I ordered. '' We need some girl-time. ''
'' I'm staying with Edward, '' Bella protested immediately. I turned around and narrowed my eyes at her.
'' Last time I checked you're a girl, Bella, '' I growled. '' You're coming with us. ''
'' I wanna hang out with the boys, '' Bella whined, looking up at Edward with big, sad eyes. Oh, no, Missy, that's not going to work this time. This is my shopping trip and I make the rules!
'' Well, you can't, so stop whining, '' I snapped. '' You'll see them in a few hours, don't be such a baby. ''
Edward smiled a sad smile that only fueled Bella's resolve to skip the shopping trip.
'' See, '' she said, pointing at Edward. '' Edward doesn't want me to go either. He's sad. I can't leave him when he's sad. ''
'' Edward put that stupid, sad face away, you're not fooling anyone, '' I snapped at him and I could see the corners of his mouth turn up in a smirk. I narrowed my eyes at him and than turned my glare on Bella.
'' Don't test my patience so early in the day, '' I warned both of them. '' This is my trip and I decide! '' I stamped my foot in aggravation, causing Edward to laugh quietly.
'' You better go with her before she starts breathing fire, '' Edward told Bella with a chuckle. '' I'll see you later, okay? ''
'' Okay, '' Bella mumbled, petulant as ever.
'' Come on, baby, '' Rose muttered, holding her hand out for Bella to take. Bella took it with a pout and glanced over her shoulder back to Edward and the others.
'' I hate shopping, '' she grumbled under her breath, but I could hear it with perfect clarity. I decided to ignore that comment. It was the same every time. Why did I have to get a little sister with an aversion to shopping? It wasn't fair.
I had made a list of all the shops and stores I wanted to visit and fifteen minutes later we entered the first one.
The elderly woman in the shop greeted us in Japanese, but I had no trouble understanding her.
That's what you get when you're immortal – a lot of spare time. And that also meant a lot of time to learn new languages.
Bella stayed close to Rose and Esme while I talked to the elderly shop owner. She nodded excitedly and glanced a few times at Bella whenever I mentioned her name. Bella, who was suddenly not so brave anymore, hid behind Rose with a soft groan that was missed by the shop owner, but perfectly audible to me. I rolled my eyes at her theatrics.
It was a small shop, very exclusive, and the shop owner only had one employee which she introduced as her daughter.
They were both perfectly polite and helpful, pulling several different outfits off the racks as I continued to explain what I was looking for.
'' Bella? '' I called when I was satisfied with the clothes I had found. I looked around and saw Bella eyeing the clothes with obvious horror. I told her to move into the dressing room, instead of releasing the growl that was tickling my throat.
'' Alice, you can't expect me to wear that, '' Bella complained as she pointed to a dark blue and white Lolita style dress. '' What is it anyway? ''
'' It's fashion, '' I answered immediately. Bella pulled a face at the dress, but held her tongue when she noticed my glare. She put the dress on without any further complaints and I almost melted on the sport when she left the dressing room to show it.
'' Oh, yes! '' I exclaimed with and excited clap of my hands. '' Perfect! ''
Bella looked down at herself and groaned softly. She took a handful of the dress and held it up.
'' I'm not sure about this, Alice, '' she muttered under her breath. She looked at Rose and Esme, expecting to find some support there since they were more eager to please her in these situations, but they were both looking at Bella with obvious adoration in their eyes. I tried to hide the smug smile that was tugging at the corners of my mouth.
'' You look beautiful, baby, '' Rose breathed. Bella pulled a face at her and I had no trouble translating her thoughts at the moment. Thanks for the help, mom.
The elderly shop owner chattered away in Japanese and I answered her questions enthusiastically.
She pulled out another dress, black and dark red this time, and I shooed Bella inside the dressing room again. She dragged her feet as she vanished from view.
After a little over an hour I had found eight new dresses for Bella. She hovered behind Rose and Esme while I paid for everything.
'' Are we done now? '' Bella muttered when we were bowed out of the shop by the elderly woman, who looked very pleased. These dresses were hand-made and relatively expensive and I had just bought eight of them. This woman had just earned a fortune, in a way then.
'' Are you kidding me? '' I said with a roll of my eyes. '' That was only the first shop! ''
'' But you bought me eight new dresses! '' Bella pointed out, eyeing the large shopping bags with disdain.
'' Exactly, you can hardly fill a wardrobe with eight dresses, '' I explained. '' Besides, everyone needs new clothes. ''
Bella groaned again, but I decided to ignore her. This was my shopping trip after all, and I wasn't going to let her ruin it.
The next shop on the list was just as exclusive, but with bigger sizes. It was time for the grown-ups.
Rose looked at herself in the mirror with obvious doubt in her eyes when she showed us the first dress I had picked out for her. Bella on the other hand was busy wiping the laughter tears from her eyes.
'' Alice, I'm not sure this is me, '' Rose commented, turning this way and that in front of the large mirror. Her large blood red dress flowing around her as she moved. I pursed my lips and examined her.
'' You're right, '' I agreed. '' Although I do like that color on you. ''
'' The color is fine, '' she nodded. '' But this dress doesn't really compliment my figure. ''
I walked to the shop owner and explained again what I was looking for. She nodded excitedly and left to go to the back of the shop. She emerged a minute later with another blood red dress and held it up with a hopeful expression.
When Rose had put it on she came out of the dressing room again with a smile on her face. This dress hugged her figure in all the right ways and was laced at the back. It was elegant, sexy and unique, just like Rose.
'' That's it! '' I exclaimed. '' I don't care what you say, Rose. This is the dress for you and I won't take no for an answer. ''
Rose laughed and turned in front of the large mirror again. '' No complaints here. I love it! ''
Bella raised her eyebrows at her mother, but decided to hold her tongue.
After that I vanished inside the dressing room, excited to find a few new outfits as well.
When I walked back out Bella snorted, but I merely rolled my eyes and admired myself in the large mirror.
'' I don't want to state the obvious, '' Bella snickered. '' But you look like a vampire straight out of a horror movie. ''
I glared at Bella through the mirror and she pressed her lips together to stop the giggle that was dying to escape.
'' Bella, be nice, '' Esme chastised. '' Alice, you look beautiful. ''
I looked myself over in the mirror with a big smile. Just because I was wearing black, didn't mean I dressed like a vampire out of a horror movie. I had always loved a little gothic and this was elegant. Bella had no knowledge of fashion.
After that I was on a roll. I tried on half the outfits in the shop and forced Rose and Esme to try on the other half. When we were done we each had seven new outfits and the shop owner bowed us out with a large smile, telling us to come back anytime we liked.
'' I think it's time for lunch, '' Esme said with a glance at her watch as we strolled along the sidewalk. '' Bella must be hungry. ''
'' And tired, '' Bella added with a nod.
'' Fine, let's find a nice place, '' I allowed.
It didn't take us long and Bella let out a long sigh when she fell into one of the chairs in the little restaurant we had found.
'' This is pure torture, '' she grumbled as she kicked her shoes off. '' How about you go on without me? ''
'' Sure, '' I muttered sarcastically. '' We'll leave you here and pick you up at the end of the day. Edward would love that. ''
'' You can leave me with them, '' she said with a hopeful expression. '' You must know where they are. ''
'' We're not done shopping, '' I said frostily.
'' You can find clothes for everyone else today, '' Bella grinned. '' And I'll join again tomorrow. A whole day of shopping is exhausting for me. You don't get tired, but I do. My feet are killing me. ''
I merely glared at her, but Esme spoke before I had the chance.
'' Maybe that's not a bad idea, '' she said slowly. '' That way she can spend some time with the boys. We're here for another few days. ''
'' What? '' I gasped. '' That's not fair! This is my trip! ''
'' Oh, come on, Alice, '' Esme soothed. '' It's not the end of the world. You will have plenty of time to shop with Bella. She won't be of any use to you if she can't walk anymore. ''
I growled under my breath, but decided that Esme did have a point.
'' Do you know where they are? '' Rose asked, waving her hand to catch the waitress' attention.
'' They're not far from here, '' I grumbled, reluctant to give in. '' Edward can probably hear our thoughts. ''
Bella sat up a little straighter and smiled. '' Well, tell them to come and get me. ''
I growled again, but decided to give her what she wanted.
Edward, I thought, the bitterness clear, even in my thoughts. I know you're around. I saw you keeping an eye on us earlier. You can come and get Bella now, but she's mine again tomorrow!
Meanwhile, Rose ordered something for Bella, since Bella didn't speak Japanese. But she looked a lot happier now that she knew that Edward was coming to get her.
The boys arrived before Bella's food did and they joined us at our table.
'' Edward! '' Bella exclaimed when he picked her up and sat down in her seat, placing her on his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he laughed. '' I'm so happy to see you. ''
I rolled my eyes again. Drama queen.
'' I'm happy to see you too, '' he laughed softly. '' Did you enjoy this morning? ''
Bella pulled a face and shook her head.
'' Bella, '' Esme warned her and she let out a sigh.
'' It was okay, '' she allowed.
'' Did Alice find you some new clothes? '' he asked with a glance at all the bags that were placed around us. I rolled my eyes again. He had been watching us for the most part, so he already knew.
'' She bought me eight dresses! '' Bella answered with a look of horror. '' And they're really weird. ''
Edward laughed again and kissed the top of her head. '' I'm sure they look lovely on you. ''
Don't make me regret this, Edward, I warned him with my thoughts. He didn't look up, but he didn't have to. I knew he had heard every word of it.
Oh, by the way, I added. We go home in a few days and we still haven't told Bella that we need to move. How about you guys find the time to tell her.
Edward looked at me now. His eyes were narrowed, but I could see the panic in them and I suppressed a sigh. My tone sounded a litter harsher than I had meant, but I was still annoyed Bella was so eager to bail on me and spend time with the boys. What was the point in having a little sister if she didn't even want to go shopping with me? Perhaps that would change once she got older.
My tone became a little kinder.
We can't put it off much longer, Edward, I reasoned. And I think Bella should have the time to get used to the idea and say good-bye to her friends. We all knew this day would come. I'm sure she'll understand.
Edward's eyebrows knitted together, but he didn't say a word. Bella was too busy eating her lunch to notice the change and after a minute he nodded slightly.
Thank you. She'll be fine, Edward. I gave him a small smile and then turned my attention to Jasper. He looked at me in question, sensing my and Edward's emotions, but I shook my head and planted a kiss on his pursed lips.
'' So, squirt, '' Emmett said, leaning over the table in Bella's direction. '' What is it you want to do this afternoon? ''
'' What do you wanna do? '' Bella mumbled around her food. I rolled my eyes and waited for Esme's reprimand.
'' Bella, how many times do I have to tell you, '' Emse said in a stern voice. '' Don't talk with your mouth full. ''
Edward snickered while Bella swallowed her food and apologized.
'' Well, there is this martial arts show a few blocks away, '' Emmett started to say, but Rose smacked him on the head.
'' You can't take Bella to a martial arts show, idiot, '' she growled while he massaged the back of his head.
'' Why not? It's not like they are actually going to kill each other. ''
'' What's a martial arts show? '' Bella asked, curious now.
'' Fighting! '' Emmett grinned, unable to hide his enthusiasm. '' Not real fighting, '' he added hastily when he saw the look in Rosalie's eyes. '' It's just for show. It's really cool. It's more like dancing with weapons. '' He turned his head and grinned at Rose who rolled her eyes at his explanation.
'' Dancing with weapons? '' Bella asked with a raised eyebrow. '' How is that cool? ''
'' Devil, '' Emmett said with a shake of his head. '' You have to trust me on this. You'll love it. ''
Bella gave him a dubious look and then turned to Jasper. He winked at her with a sly grin and she pressed her lips together. She then looked up at Edward who had decided to play dumb. He was admiring the lace curtains that hung in front of a nearby window and Bella rolled her eyes. She turned back to Emmett with a grin and nodded. '' Okay, let's go watch some martial arts. ''
'' That's the spirit, rebel! '' Emmett boomed and he banged his fist on the table, causing it to shake violently. An elderly couple that was seated at a nearby table looked around in shock when the noise echoed around the room. They threw him a scandalized look when Emmett laughed loudly and Rose growled under her breath.
'' Not a chance! '' she glowered at him and his laughter subsided.
'' Aw, come on, baby, '' he pleaded. '' You know it's not that bad. Why, even Edward - '' he started to say with a wave of his hand in Edward's direction, who was still absorbed by the lace curtains.
'' She's too young to see that sort of thing, '' Rose interrupted him, crossing her arms over her chest.
'' Guys, help me out here, '' he begged, looking from Jasper to Carlisle to Edward in turn.
'' Nothing traumatizing there, Rose, '' Jasper nodded. '' I promise. ''
'' If Bella's afraid or things get too far we can always leave, '' Carlisle added with a shrug. I rolled my eyes at that. Men were all the same, no matter what age they were.
Rose turned her glare on Edward who still seemed to admire the same stupid curtain.
'' Edward! '' she growled under her breath. '' Say something! ''
Finally, he looked away from the curtain and rested his eyes on Rose. His expression was calm and collected. '' I agree with Carlisle, '' was all he said.
Rosalie's mouth fell open with an audible pop and Emmett closed it again with the tip of his finger.
It took her a few seconds to recover. '' Thanks for the help, moron, '' she growled at Edward, but he merely shrugged. '' You're always overprotective when it comes to Bella, '' she continued. '' To the extreme, and now you choose to be the cool one? What's the matter with you? ''
'' Protective, yes. Overprotective, no, '' he said in a bored voice. '' I want Bella to be safe and this is just a show. Nothing dangerous about it. If she doesn't like it, we'll leave. Simple as. ''
Bella looked up at Edward with wide eyes, but she couldn't help the smile that nearly split her face in two. I had no idea what had gotten into Edward, and clearly neither did Bella or Rose, but I was happy to see that he seemed to go with the flow for once. I had no idea what had inspired this change in behavior, but I wasn't going to complain about it.
'' You're overruled, baby, '' Emmett said, but Rose threw him one of her infamous death glares and the grin that had started to spread across his face quickly faded away.
'' Shut up, before I tear your arm out of its socket, '' she growled under her breath.
'' Aw, mom, '' Bella laughed. '' I'm not a baby and I don't scare easily. If I don't like it we'll leave. They'll look after me. Please? '' she held her hands in front of her and pouted.
Rose growled again, but gave in with a sigh.
Edward started playing with a lock of Bella's hair while she finished her lunch. He seemed oddly serene and content. When he started humming under his breath the sound was only interrupted by gritting teeth and I didn't need to look up to know who had made the noise. I decided that Rose was in serious need of more spectacular outfits.
Bella's POV.
'' I can't see anything! '' I shouted over the noise of the loud music that was playing. I hopped up and down, trying to catch a glimpse of the show, but it was useless. Why were grown-ups so tall?
I was suddenly hoisted into the air by a pair of strong arms and next thing I knew I was sitting on Emmett's shoulders.
'' Better? '' He laughed when I yelled in surprise and held on to his curly, dark hair.
'' Yes, '' I giggled. '' Thank you. ''
It wasn't strange for Emmett to do these kind of things, even as I grew older. He was so big that people wouldn't find it suspicious that he could lift me up without breaking a sweat. He looked like he could hoist a cow above his head with one arm and pull a truck with the other.
'' Em, check out that guy! '' Jasper said, pointing at a short, muscular man in the middle. He only held a long wooden stick, but he didn't seem to need anything else. He was very fast, for a human, and he was fighting four people at once!
'' He's okay, '' Emmett shrugged, unimpressed. The moment his shoulders lifted I wobbled a little and I clutched his curls a little tighter. I knew he would never let me fall, but my own sense of balance was so underdeveloped that it had become an automatic reaction to grab anything I could hold on to. '' I prefer him, '' he added. He pointed his finger at a huge bearlike man who made a show of lifting people above his head.
I heard Jasper laugh beside us. '' No surprise there. It's not all about muscles though, '' he continued and I turned my head to look at him. '' You can't always rely on strength alone. It's also about skills and strategy. ''
'' You only say that, because you know I can whoop your ass any day, '' Emmett laughed.
Jasper lifted his eyebrow and the right corner of his mouth twisted up into a smirk.
'' This again, tough guy? How many times do I have to beat you before you give up? ''
'' Cheating doesn't count as winning, '' Emmett retorted, fueled by Jasper's words.
'' I guess we'll have to settle this the old fashioned way. Again, '' Jasper laughed and Emmett punched his arm in agreement.
I shook my head at the two of them and turned my attention back to the martial arts show before me. Jasper and Emmett had fought so many times over the years that I had lost count. I had never really understood why they felt the need to fight all the time, but mom had said that it was a boys thing. I wasn't so sure about that, though. Edward didn't feel the need to fight all the time. Emmett said that was because Edward was a boring goody-two-shoes, but I knew better. Edward wasn't boring at all.
I watched as the fast one floored three people at once with one swing of his wooden stick and the audience applauded.
'' Awesome! '' Jazz yelled next to me and I laughed.
He was right though. This was awesome. A part of me began to understand why Emmett and Jasper liked fighting. And they were good at it too. Well, Jasper was. Emmett was just insanely strong. I would never be strong like Emmett.
As I watched the martial arts show a part of my brain traveled back to a particular conversation. To the day I had found out how my parents had died. How they were murdered. By vampires. I looked at my family. Life was strange. My parents were murdered by vampires and, here I was, sitting on the shoulders of a very big one that had become my big brother. I wondered if my parents would be sad if they knew that I had been adopted by a family of vampires. I thought about Edward and I shook my head. No, they wouldn't mind. The Cullens were different. Good. They loved me.
I remembered the promise I had made after that conversation. In order to avenge the deaths of my parents I had to become a vampire. I would become older and stronger and then change into one myself. I hadn't told anyone about that promise. I had no idea how they would react. Edward would go crazy.
Emmett's shoulders suddenly moved again and I clutched his head in involuntarily response. I was vaguely aware of his booming laugh, but I was too absorbed.
'' Jazz? '' I asked. He looked up from the show with a smile.
'' Yes? ''
'' Where did they learn to do this? '' I asked with a nod at the show before me.
'' They took lessons, '' he told me. '' Why? ''
'' Lessons? '' I repeated. '' Did you take lessons too? ''
He laughed and shook his head. '' No, what makes you think that? ''
I shrugged in an attempt to seem nonchalant. '' Because you can fight too. I thought maybe someone had taught you how to do that. ''
He looked at me, but didn't respond. He seemed a little uncomfortable.
'' Where did you learn it then? '' I prompted.
'' I, er... '' he said, looking away for the first time. '' That's a long story. I'll tell you sometime. ''
'' Is it a scary story? ''
'' A little, '' he confessed. '' It's not a nice story, so I'll tell you when you're older. ''
I huffed and rolled my eyes.
'' Why the sudden interest? '' he asked. It was my turn to look away. I didn't know how to tell him without revealing too much.
'' Can you teach me how to fight like them? '' I asked quietly, pointing at the show once more.
Jasper's eyes widened at my question and he seemed at a loss for words.
'' What? '' Emmett interrupted. He looked up at me and I had to clutch his head again. He laughed.
'' What's that, rebel? ''
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. '' I want to learn how to do that. ''
'' Why? '' Jasper asked, his tone suspicious.
'' Because it looks cool, '' I lied with a big smile. Emmett shook with laughter and I wrapped myself around his head like a constricting vine.
'' Emmett! '' I shouted, holding on for dear life. He suddenly grabbed me and held me in his arms. I growled at him, but that only fueled his laughter.
'' Squirt, '' he laughed with a shake of his head. '' Please tell me you're joking. ''
'' No, I'm not, '' I huffed as I crossed my arms over my chest. He laughed again and I narrowed my eyes at him.
'' You're like a tiny, tiny kitten that has convinced herself she's a tiger, '' he laughed. '' Not to mention as clumsy as they come. You could trip over your own shadow! '' His booming laugh filled the air around us.
'' Ha ha, '' I snarled. '' You're hilarious! ''
'' I know! '' He retorted, still laughing. I growled again and turned my attention to Jasper.
'' Please, Jazz, '' I pleaded. '' I want to learn. ''
He frowned and slowly shook his head from side to side. '' Where is this coming from, Bella? ''
I bit my lip, thinking about my response. '' Well, '' I started to say. '' I just want to learn. I'm weak. I want to be strong like you all are. ''
'' You'll never be as strong as we are, squirt, '' Emmett said, serious now. '' You're human. ''
'' So? '' I asked. '' They are human too. And they're strong. They can fight. ''
'' They're still no match for us, '' he said.
'' Yes, thanks captain obvious, '' I snapped. He laughed again. '' But I can be strong for a human. ''
'' Doubtful, '' Emmett laughed with another shake of his head. '' You're way too clumsy to fight, squirt. '' I glared at him again. '' Hey, don't look at me like that, '' he hastily added. '' It's true. You would probably hurt yourself in an attempt to hurt your opponent. ''
'' Maybe it will improve my sense of balance! I could kill two birds with one stone. ''
'' Doubtful, '' Emmett laughed again. '' Your aim is terrible. ''
I rolled my eyes at his stupid joke.
'' What do you mean, Bella? '' Jasper asked, still confused and suspicious. '' Kill two birds with one stone? What reasons do you have? ''
Oh-oh. My mouth had run away with me.
'' Just, '' I hesitated. '' That I could improve my balance and become stronger. ''
'' Why would you want to be stronger? You're perfect the way you are. ''
I rolled my eyes at that. '' No, I'm not. I'm weak and I don't like it. ''
'' Bella, is this about your parents? Are you afraid someone will hurt you? Because you know you don't have to worry about that. We would never let that happen. ''
I turned my head away and stared at Emmett's broad chest.
'' What? '' Emmett said, looking down at me again. His face serious now. '' Is that what this is about? Are you afraid? ''
'' No, it's not about that, '' I mumbled with a shake of my head.
'' Squirt, if someone hurts you I'll kick their ass, '' Emmett said. I could hear the fierce protectiveness in his voice and I tried to suppress a smile.
'' I know that, '' I smiled up at him. '' I'm not worried about anything like that. I just – I want to be strong like you. You're not always around and I – I just want to make sure I can take care of myself, you know? Not because I'm afraid, but because I want to. Just in case. You want me to be safe, right? ''
'' Of course we do, '' Jasper said without hesitation. '' But you are. You don't have to worry about anything. ''
'' I don't worry! '' I said, frustrated now. '' I'm always the weak, little human. I don't want to be weak. I want to be able to take care of myself. I don't want to rely on you every step of the way. Don't you understand that? ''
Jasper didn't answer, so I continued.
'' How would you feel if you were me? How would you feel if you had to ask others to help you, because you couldn't do it yourself? I'm not afraid, I just want to be - ''
'' Independent? '' Emmett offered.
'' Yes! '' I nodded. '' Exactly. I want to be independent. ''
Emmett laughed. '' You're just like your mother, '' he said and he sounded proud. I smiled at him.
'' She doesn't take crap from anyone! I like that. We can teach you. ''
'' Emmett, '' Jasper said with a shake of his head. '' We have to discuss this as a family. ''
I rolled my eyes. '' I'm sure mom wouldn't mind. ''
'' It's not just Rose, '' Jasper said and I suddenly thought about Edward. I sighed. Edward. He and Carlisle had left a while ago, because Carlisle wanted to discuss something with Edward. Edward would never go for this. That's why I had asked Jasper. But Jazz seemed a little reluctant to agree unless everyone was on board. Perhaps he still felt guilty about the other day. It wasn't his fault, but Edward had been mad at him and Emmett.
'' We'll talk about this later, okay? '' he said and I agreed with another sigh.
'' That's out of the question! '' Edward fumed. He ran an agitated hand through is copper, tousled hair. '' Every time I leave Bella with the two of you, something happens! '' He glared at Jasper and Emmett.
I was seated next to Rose and Alice on the large sofa and watched Edward as he paced the living room in furious silence.
'' Edward, I told her we needed to discuss this as a family, '' Jasper reasoned calmly. '' I didn't promise her anything. ''
'' Of course you didn't! '' He growled.
'' Edward, calm down and take a seat, '' Carlisle ordered. '' There are other things we need to discuss as a family. '' Edward locked eyes with Carlisle and seemed to calm down a little. Or at least, that's what it looked like. He turned around with a growl and fell down in one of the armchairs.
'' Right, '' Carlisle said when Edward was fuming silently in his chair. He turned his attention to me.
'' Bella, where is this coming from? '' he asked, curious and confused at the same time.
I sighed. I hadn't thought this through at all. If I slipped up, even a little bit, things could get ugly. Edward would be mad as hell. He already was. I hated to think what his reaction would be if he found out my true motivations. I thanked god again that Edward couldn't read my thoughts.
'' I just, '' I hesitated, thinking about my words. '' I want to be independent. '' I looked at Emmett who grinned back at me.
'' Independent, '' Edward scoffed. '' Bella, come on, you're nine years old! If you want to be more independent you should learn how to cook or wash your own clothes! Not learn how to fight, for god's sake! ''
I growled at him and his eyes widened a little. '' Mom's already teaching me how to cook, '' I pointed out. '' And nobody washes their own clothes in this house, not even you. Indeed, nobody even wears the same clothes twice, so there's no need to wash them! And for your information Edward, '' I added with a glower. '' I'm almost ten! ''
I heard someone snicker beside me and turned my head to see Rose covering her mouth with her right hand. I turned my attention back to Edward who was staring at me, his mouth hanging open.
'' So, '' I continued. '' I want to learn how to fight. I'm sick and tired of being a weak, little human. I want to be strong like you all are. ''
Edward's mouth snapped shut and he narrowed his eyes at me. '' What's this really about? '' he asked and I bit my lip before I could stop it. '' There's more. ''
'' How would you know? '' I retorted as I turned my head away. '' You can't read my mind, so don't pretend like you know everything about me. ''
Edward growled under his breath, but he leaned back in his seat, adopting a calm pose.
'' I may not be able to read your mind, '' he said with a satisfied nod. '' But I can read your face and body language. And Bella, '' he added. '' You're not that difficult to read. You refuse to look at me, which means you're hiding something. You're body language is defensive and let's not forget your choice of words. ''
I looked at him and saw that he was smiling smugly. That only fueled my anger.
'' My choice of words? '' I sneered. '' I only told you how I felt. ''
'' Exactly, '' he nodded. '' You said you want to be strong like us. So, I ask you again. What is this really about? ''
I opened my mouth to say something, but then closed it again. I had to be careful. Edward usually saw right through me and he was simply waiting for me to slip up.
'' I already told you, '' I said after a moment of silence.
'' Tell the truth, Bella, '' he said and his tone held something of a warning. I gritted my teeth and glared at him.
'' You want to know what I think? '' Edward continued. '' I think this has something to do with your parents. Are you afraid now that you know the truth? Because, '' he paused and leaned forward in his seat. His eyes became their usual liquid gold, but with an edge of concern and protectiveness.
'' You don't have to be afraid. No one will ever hurt you again. I'll die before I let that happen. ''
I could hear the truth behind his words and they frightened me. I had no doubt that everyone else felt the same way. They would die to protect me. Is that how this tragic tale was going to end? No, it wouldn't. Because no one would ever die for me ever again. I had no doubt my parents had tried to protect me as well. Perhaps that was why they had died. I couldn't let the same thing happen to my new family. That is why I had to get stronger. So I could protect them!
'' I'm not afraid someone is going to hurt me, '' I whispered. '' I just want to be able to defend myself. Just in case. Don't you want me to be safe? ''
His eyes widened at my words before his eyebrows knitted together in a frown. '' That's all I want, Bella, '' he said, his tone honest and fierce. '' But you are safe. Nothing is going to happen to you. ''
'' You can't know that, '' I shook my head. '' And you're not always around to protect me. And I don't want that either. I want to be able to protect myself. '' And others, I added silently. My family. All the people I loved. But he didn't need to know that. He would get mad if he knew.
'' Bella, '' he sighed and he closed his eyes. '' It's our job to protect you. You're a child. And a human one at that. You can't protect yourself. And learning how to fight won't help with that. ''
'' Yes, it will! '' I said loudly. '' I know I'll never be as strong as you and that I don't stand a chance against vampires, but I could get stronger and defend myself from other humans. ''
'' Nobody is going to hurt you, '' he repeated.
'' Ugh! '' I threw my hands in the air in frustration. '' You really don't get it, do you? How would you feel if you had to rely on others? How would you feel if you were me? I'm always the weak one. I don't want to be weak! ''
'' Even if you learn how to fight, you'd still be weak, '' Edward pointed out. '' You're no match for vampires. ''
'' Hang on, '' Rose interrupted us. '' I think Bella has a point. ''
Edward's eyes snapped from mine to Rose's. I turned to look at her too, but her eyes were focused on Edward. They stayed silent for a few seconds.
'' Rose, '' Edward suddenly said with a shake of his head. '' That will never happen to her. ''
I had no idea what they were talking about.
'' Then I'll kill him! '' Edward suddenly growled. His anger was visible. Rose merely sighed and shook her head. They were clearly having a silent conversation. Grrr...
'' Hello! '' Emmett interrupted them. '' No silent conversations. Tell us what's going on. ''
'' No, '' Edward said hastily. '' It's not suited for everyone, Emmett. '' He locked eyes with Emmett and nodded slowly. Emmett turned his head and looked at Rose. A frown appeared on his round face and he grabbed her hand in comfort.
'' We won't let that happen to her, '' Emmett said quietly. His voice sounded both concerned and soothing. This was beyond irritating. They were purposefully keeping me out of this. Why? This was about me after all.
'' Look, '' I said, annoyed. '' I don't know what this is all about, but since it's about me don't you think I have the right to know? ''
'' You don't need to know this, '' Edward answered without taking his eyes off Rosalie.
I looked at Rose again and her eyes were sad now.
'' Mom? '' I asked and she closed her eyes before she looked at me. Even though she tried to hide it behind the smile she showed me now, the sadness was still visible. And not just that, other emotions were etched on her face. Her eyebrows were knitted together in a way that told me she was worried. Her lips looked thinner in their anger, and her eyes still showed the sadness that her smile tried to hide. She usually tried to put on a good face when she was around me. Except when she got really mad, of course. I saw her anger almost on a daily basis. This was a different kind of anger though. The kind of anger she usually tried to hide from me. I supposed it wasn't anger. It was bitterness. Every single member of my family showed expressions that were simply too old for their physical age. It had taken me a while to notice that, because they had always been like that to me. But when I started meeting other people – human people- I had started to recognize the differences. Not the obvious differences, but the small ones. They carried so much more with them than humans did, because they were so much older than any human I had ever met. It was so easy to forget how old they really were. To me they were ageless. They were simply my family. I couldn't even begin to understand all the things that they had seen. The worlds they had lived in. I tried to picture it every now and then, but most of the time I came up blank.
I was only nine years old and, even though I had experienced loss and pain, I knew that they had seen and felt so much more than I had. Edward was more than ten times my age and Jasper and Carlisle were even older than he was. So it was safe to assume that they had experienced at least ten times more losses and ten times more pain than I had. I became sad whenever I thought about that. It put things in a different perspective.
'' Edward is right, baby, '' my mother smiled sadly. '' You don't need to know this. ''
She looked a little worn out all of a sudden. I tore my eyes away from her and focused on Edward again. He was still staring at Rose and his face looked almost the same as hers. I slowly looked at each member of my family in turn and saw Rose's expression reflected in all of theirs. So much ancient sadness. This was exactly why I had to become stronger. I knew that I couldn't protect them now, and that I could never take away the pain they had felt before they had met me. Just like they couldn't take away the pain I had experienced before I had met them. Try as they might to protect me from everything, they couldn't erase what had already happened. They could only try to protect me from further harm, and that's exactly what I wanted to do for them. If there was even the slightest chance that I could ease their worries and soothe their pain I would do it.
'' You're all sad, '' I whispered after a long silence. I turned to Rose before I spoke again.
'' You don't have to tell me, mom, '' I continued, my voice still a whisper. I sighed and cleared my throat before I resumed. I knew they could hear my whispers, but I wanted to make myself clear. Literally. '' I get it, '' I nodded and she frowned at me now. I saw panic in her eyes, but I continued before she could voice her fears.
'' I usually forget how old all of you really are. '' I smiled and shook my head. '' And sometimes, like now, I realize it and it makes me a little sad too. ''
'' You don't have to be sad about that, baby, '' Rose interrupted. Ready, as always, to shoo away any bad feeling I might have. Hoping, like any mother, that her child would only feel the good. An impossible task, but she never stopped trying.
I shook my head at her and continued. '' It makes me sad, because, I've experienced pain and I'm only nine years old. So I know that you have all experienced even more pain than I have. And you all carry that with you, just like I do. It makes me sad that you all have to carry so much. ''
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before I turned to face the rest of my family. They were all silent for once. Without words perhaps.
'' It makes me sad, because I know that I can never take any of it away. It makes me sad, because I can see how hard you all try to shield me from every bad thing that could possibly happen. Every thing that you have all seen and felt. It makes me sad, because I can't possibly understand what all of you have been through. That I can never understand the times you have lived in. It makes me sad that all of you are always so worried about me. Worried about hurting me, or scaring me or losing sight of me. Worried that something horrible might happen to me. You all worry so much. I'm the weakest person in this room, but all of you are way more scared than I am. I'm not afraid something bad will happen to me. I refuse to be afraid of that. And besides, I know all of you will do everything you can to keep me safe. You all try way too hard to keep me safe. You always have. And I know it's because you all love me so much. I love you too, you know that. But sometimes, it makes me feel helpless. Like I can't do anything at all. And yes, you're right, Edward. '' I turned to look at him now. He was staring at me, his anger had vanished. '' I will never be as strong as any of you, because yes, I am human. So in a way I'll always be weak and helpless compared to you. I just don't want to feel helpless and weak. It's a horrible feeling. I feel powerless and I hate it. That's why I want to learn how to fight. Because I hate this feeling that I have every single day and I don't want to feel that way anymore. So please, let me do this. Let me try to get rid of this horrible feeling I carry with me every day. Please. ''
I was still looking at Edward when I finished my speech, but he remained silent. I knew that he was the one I had to convince more than anyone else in this room, so I kept my eyes on him.
'' Please, Edward, '' I said when he still hadn't spoken after a minute. I could see the emotions in his eyes though. Every single one of them. Worry, panic, anxiety and more worries. I saw them every day. Deep down I knew that they would always be there, but I hoped that, someday, I wouldn't see them as much anymore.
Edward's POV.
I stared at Bella while she pleaded with me. I could see the sadness in her eyes, but, most of all, I could see the fire that burned within her. Her determination. But there was also desperation. She was desperate to convince me, desperate to make us see her side. And perhaps something else. Something I feared.
I knew she wasn't lying right now. I could see that much. But I still suspected that she wasn't being entirely honest either. I couldn't shake the feeling that she had a hidden motive.
'' Please, Edward, '' she said, her tone pleading.
She seemed desperate to make me see her side and I had never been able to resist her once she started begging me to do things. I understood her reasons. Of course I did. I was just too scared to give her what she wanted.
I thought about the dangers that could befall her every single day. Every time she was away from me the fear consumed me. She was just so fragile and human.
But still, I didn't want her to have the same fears I had. It was my job to worry about her safety. She shouldn't have to think about those things.
Deep down I knew that that was unrealistic. Especially now that she knew what had happened to her. To her parents. It was only natural for her to be afraid after hearing the truth.
Edward. Rosalie's thoughts penetrated my chaotic mind. Bella was still looking at me with that same desperate and fiery expression and I was unable to take my eyes off her. But I blinked once to let Rosalie know that I was listening.
Edward, she repeated before she continued on with what she wanted to say. I already knew what she wanted to say, but apparently, she felt the need to voice it properly nevertheless.
I know that you don't like to think about it, and neither do I, but the reality scares me. I want her to be safe. And I know what you're going to say, she added hastily. That you'd die before you let anything like that happen to her. And you know I feel the same way, but that doesn't change the fact that it still frightens me. Humans can be cruel. You know that as well as I do. We have both seen it. You and I more than anyone else in this room. We share the same fears. They consume us on a daily basis. Always afraid that something might happen to Bella. We do worry too much. Bella's right about that. She's not stupid, Edward. She sees it, whether we like it or not. Her words only confirmed what I have known all along. I don't want to turn my fears into her fears. I guess it's already a little late for that, she added. She sounded sad and disappointed in herself. I wanted to tell her that it wasn't her fault. Comfort her in some way, any way, but I wasn't able to speak. Bella's fierce eyes still kept me a prisoner. So I just sighed, inaudible to human ears, and allowed Rose to continue.
What I'm trying to say is, she thought, I think we should consider her request. I understand her feelings and Edward, I don't want her to feel like this. If she needs to do this to feel safe again, than we should let her do it.
'' Edward, please, '' Bella repeated and I gritted my teeth together in anguish. Rose was right, of course. I didn't want Bella to feel like this either. But then again, I didn't want her to feel unsafe at all. And I hated that I couldn't take that feeling away. No matter what I did.
Bella may have said that she wasn't afraid, but I simply didn't believe her. None of us did. I had heard it in all of their thoughts. We all knew that she was scared. I made me feel powerless that I couldn't do anything to change it. I couldn't do or change a damn thing.
Edward. This time it was Emmett's voice that intruded. This is not such a bad thing. If it makes her feel safe again... You can't always take every bad feeling away, you know. Everyone has their own demons to deal with. Their own battles to fight. Bella is no different. We won't let anything happen to her. None of us will. But if she really needs this … then perhaps we should just let her do it.
Besides, he added, his mental tone lighter than before. His usual humor returned. I'd pay a fortune to see Bella fighting. It may come in handy in the future...
His thoughts took a strange turn and he imagined how an older Bella floored a vague boyish figure in one swift move. I merely raised an eyebrow. I heard his mental laugh.
You wouldn't have to fight any guy in the future to win her affections, he laughed. She could do it for you! Oh, hang on...
The mental picture shifted and suddenly Bella was fighting some girl Emmett had just invented. Bella yelled at the girl. Stay away from Edward or I'll kill you! That was what she shouted. Emmett's booming laugh suddenly echoed around the room. He wasn't silent any longer. Everyone's heads turned around in surprise. Bella's head turned to Emmett as well, breaking eye contact with me for the first time.
'' Emmett? '' she said, clearly surprised at his sudden outburst.
'' What the hell? '' Rose blurted out, evidently experiencing the same surprise as Bella.
But Emmett merely shook with laughter, unable to hold it in any longer.
'' Damn, Eddie, '' he boomed, rolling off the couch and banging his fist on the wooden coffee table that stood in front of him, causing it to crack under the pressure.
'' Emmett! '' Esme gasped. '' That's my coffee table! ''
'' What the hell are you doing, you idiot! '' Rose growled, smacking him on the back of his head. She turned her glare on me now. '' What's this all about? '' she demanded.
But I was in no position to answer her. Emmett's lame imagination had stirred something inside me.
I wasn't sure if I found his thoughts disturbing or hilarious. Perhaps a little bit of both.
The thought that Bella could physically hurt anyone seemed laughable. Not only was she a human little girl, but she was a very clumsy one too. Besides, she was too sweet to ever hurt anyone. Or so I liked to think. Or did I?
Emmett had made her sound so possessive of me in his thoughts. I couldn't deny that a part of me had actually enjoyed that. Liked that even.
'' Well, '' Jasper laughed, looking down at a still laughing Emmett. '' That certainly cleared the tension. ''
Everyone continued to look at Emmett.
'' Yo, giggles, '' Jasper said, raising an eyebrow. '' Knock it off. We're in the middle of a discussion here. ''
Emmett looked up and tried to compose himself. '' Sorry, '' he laughed. '' But I just had the most hilarious vision and I couldn't help it. ''
'' Care to share? '' Rosalie asked, rather impatient. She had crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him.
Before he could regale everyone with his messed up fantasies I cleared my throat.
'' Let's not, shall we? '' I said, trying to banish the vision from my mind. '' Jasper's right. We're in the middle of a discussion. ''
Emmett sat back down on the couch with a large grin and held his hands up in surrender.
Totally worth it, Emmett thought, his mental tone still full of humor. Just picture that before you tell her no, Edward. You can't tell me that you wouldn't love to see that someday.
I cleared my throat and shot him an annoyed look before I turned my attention back to Bella. The real Bella. The nine year old girl that stood before me. The little girl that had already cried so many tears that I was surprised she still had some tears left in her. The girl that woke up screaming every now and then because she was plagued with horrible visions of her past. The past that I could never erase.
Before I could say anything Carlisle cleared his throat and took matters into his own hands again.
'' I think Bella has made her point, '' he said, smiling warmly at her. Bella nodded at him and then turned her attention back to me. She clearly wanted my permission. She wanted me to understand her and give her what she wanted. She wouldn't be satisfied until I did that. That much was clear. No matter what the others thought or said.
I sighed.
'' Bella, '' I began, still torn. My suspicions were still there after all. '' Are you sure about this? ''
'' Yes, '' she said, nodding fervently. '' Very sure. I want this, Edward. So, please - ''
'' If this is what you really want, '' I sighed. I couldn't deny her something she really wanted. And in all honesty, I wasn't entirely opposed to the idea. It scared me, but I knew that she needed to do this. She needed to face her fears. It wasn't something I could do for her, even though I wished I could do just that.
Bella's face looked suddenly hopeful. '' Do you mean it, Edward? '' she said, unable to contain her excitement. '' Are you really telling me that I can learn how to fight? ''
'' Yes, '' I sighed. I felt drained, exhausted. If I denied her this I wouldn't hear the end of it.
She let out a high pitched squeal that put Alice to shame. Next thing I knew she had thrown herself at me. She warped her arms around my neck and clung to me as if her life depended on it.
'' Thank you! '' she laughed. I had never seen her so happy about something before. She really wanted this. No, more than that. She needed this. '' Thank you so much, Edward! I love you! ''
I wrapped my arms around her tiny form and laughed, unable to help myself. Her enthusiasm was infectious. Her happiness and her words filled me with a warmth that dispelled the fears that were still a part of me. For now. I knew they would return. But for now, I was simply happy that she was happy. I was happy that I had been the one to make her happy. That was all that mattered to me after all. Bella's happiness.
'' I do have a few conditions, though, '' I said when she had calmed down somewhat. She loosened her grip around my neck so she could look me in the eye. Her eyes became a little wary, but her happiness hadn't subsided.
'' What conditions? '' she asked slowly, taking a step back so she could look at me properly.
'' You can take lessons, '' I said with a nod. '' But I decide where and I want to keep an eye on you, so I'll go with you. Every time. ''
Bella laughed and nodded excitedly, her happiness back in full force.
'' Whatever you want, Edward, '' she laughed. She hugged me again before she turned to the room at large. '' I can't believe it! '' She almost jumped into the air and I shook my head at her in amusement.
'' Yeah, me either, '' Emmett grinned. '' This is going to be hilarious! I'm so going to be there to see this! ''
'' Agreed, '' Jasper laughed. '' Bella's always good for a laugh, but this... '' He blew the air out of his cheeks and smirked at her.
Bella crossed her arms over her chest. '' There's no way you two are tagging along, '' she huffed.
'' Only Edward can come. At least he won't laugh at me. ''
Emmett burst out in laughter. '' I'm not so sure about that, '' he laughed. '' Even a humorless guy like Eddie has a limit. ''
'' He's not humorless, '' Bella growled.
Carlisle cleared his throat again when Emmett was about to respond.
'' Guys, guys, '' he said calmly. '' That's enough. '' He crossed one leg over the other and adopted a calm pose. He looked at Bella and she simply stared back at him.
'' Oh, '' she suddenly mumbled. '' I was so excited that Edward said yes... I didn't even wait to hear if you agreed, dad. Sorry. ''
'' Yes, '' he nodded slowly, as if this displeased him. But I had heard his thoughts on the matter long before I had given my consent.
'' Sorry, '' Bella mumbled again, embarrassed. Her cheeks turned pink and she shuffled her foot, feeling self-conscious. She looked down and bit her lip.
'' I guess it's a good thing I agree then, '' Carlisle said after a few seconds of silence. Bella's head snapped up and she threw him a bright smile.
'' Really? '' she exclaimed. '' Thanks, dad! ''
She flung her arms around his neck the same way she had with me and he laughed at her reaction.
'' You're welcome, sweetheart, '' he chuckled. '' If this is want you need, then I won't stand in your way. As long as Edward keeps an eye on you I have no objections. ''
She then froze in his arms and turned to face Esme.
'' Mom? '' she asked.
'' Whatever you need, sweetheart, '' was all she said. Bella smiled and turned to face Rosalie.
Rose smiled at her and nodded. '' You know my answer, baby, '' she said. '' I just want to add that I'm already proud of you. You are already so much stronger than you give yourself credit for. '' She laughed then. '' Go show 'em what you're made of! ''
Bella laughed and blew her a kiss.
'' There is only one thing left to discuss, '' Alice said, speaking for the first time. She had been silent throughout, thinking that it wasn't up to her to decide if Bella should learn to fight or not. She would have voted yes though, if it had come to that. I had heard her thoughts on the matter.
And right now, I was once again aware of her thoughts. I knew what she was getting at and I sighed again. We still hadn't told Bella that we needed to move. We were running out of time and Bella deserved a chance to say good-bye to her friends and get used to the idea of moving to a different place. This wasn't going to be pleasant, I was sure of that.
Bella, who was still hugging Carlisle, turned her head to Alice and looked at her in question.
'' We have more things to discuss? She asked, bewildered.
'' I'm afraid so, '' Alice said, nodding gravely. '' There is something we need to tell you. ''
I could have sensed Bella's fear even without Jasper's thoughts. Her eyes widened and the color drained from her face.
What was she thinking? Did she think that we had more distressing news about her past? It certainly looked like she expected the worst.
'' No, Bella, '' Jasper said before I could even get a word out. '' You don't have to be scared. It's probably not what you think. ''
Bella placed herself on Carlisle's lap and clasped her hands together in front of her.
'' I don't need to be scared? '' she asked. '' Then why are you all so serious and sad? ''
'' Because we're not sure how you feel about it, '' Jasper explained. '' We're afraid that you'll be sad. ''
'' What is it then? Has something bad happened? '' Bella still sounded worried, but she didn't look as scared as she had done a minute ago.
'' No, nothing like that, '' Jasper assured her. He then turned to look at Alice who was clearly struggling to find the right words.
She had asked me to tell her, but I just hadn't found the time to bring it up. What with everything else that had happened.
'' I don't know an easy way to say this, so here it is, '' Alice said. '' We need to move. ''
Bella's expression turned into a confused one. '' Move? '' she repeated, as if she didn't understand what Alice was talking about. After as few seconds realization dawned on her and she sighed.
'' Oh, I see, '' she mumbled. She looked down at her feet that were dangling above the ground and started chewing on her bottom lip. She always did this when she was stressed out or thinking really hard about something.
'' I see, '' she repeated, nodding to herself.
'' It's been almost four years, Bella, '' Alice explained. '' We have all finished high school and Carlisle... '' She paused for a bit. '' People will start to notice that we aren't getting any older. We have to move to a new place before people are starting to suspect things. ''
'' Where are we going? '' Bella asked, still looking at her bare feet.
'' Alaska, '' Alice informed her. '' It's a little colder than London, but it's nice and cloudy there so we can go outside during the day. It's not far from Tanya and the others actually. You'll be able to see them more often. ''
Bella pulled a face at that and I had no trouble translating her thoughts. Tanya wasn't exactly her favorite person in the world.
'' Kate and Carmen will be there too, '' Alice added hastily when she noticed Bella's expression.
'' What about my friends? '' Bella asked, her tone sounded sad and I wished, like I had many times before, that we could give her the life that she truly deserved. A life where she didn't have to say good-bye to her friends. A life where she didn't have to lie about her family. It wasn't fair.
'' You can say good-bye to them, '' Alice said, trying to sound soothing. '' That's why we're telling you this now. We want to give you a chance to say good-bye and get used to the idea. We're not moving tomorrow. ''
'' When are we moving then? '' Bella asked. Her voice still sounded sad and it felt like my heart would break.
'' September, '' Alice told her. '' So we can start the new school year in Alaska. ''
'' That's only a few weeks away, '' Bella said, finally looking up. '' Will I ever see them again? My friends? ''
'' I don't think so, Bella, '' Alice said with a sad shake of her head. '' Alaska is far away from London and we can't go back once we're gone. Humans can't know about us, you know that. It would raise too many questions. I'm sorry. ''
Bella looked down at her feet again and nodded. '' I understand. ''
'' It's okay to feel sad, baby, '' Rose said, trying to soothe her. Bella nodded absentmindedly, still chewing on her bottom lip. I was momentarily distracted by it. It seemed as if she was about to chew right threw it.
'' Bella, '' I said, unable to stay silent any longer. '' Please stop biting your lip. ''
She looked up at me, her lip still trapped between her teeth. She seemed to notice after a second and released it slowly. She turned her head to the side as if she was trying to understand my words.
'' Does it bother you? '' she asked, confused.
'' I don't want you to hurt yourself, '' I explained.
That would be problematic. I was already feeling lousy that she would have to say good-bye to her friends because of what we were. I didn't want things to get out of control when she accidentally drew blood. I wasn't afraid that I would hurt her, but it would be unpleasant at the very least. No matter how attuned we all were to her scent and presence, she was still a temptation. I hated that part even more than anything else we put her through by simply being in her life. Even after three years I still struggled with it. I probably always would. I would never stop worrying about her safety and happiness.
Bella seemed to understand what I was getting at and smiled apologetically before she turned her attention back to Alice.
'' What about Peach? '' she asked, resuming her questions as if I hadn't interrupted her. '' And Willow? '' She turned to look at Jasper. '' And Midnight, '' she added.
'' They're all coming with us, of course, '' Jasper answered with a smile. '' We won't leave them behind. ''
'' Good, '' Bella sighed in relief. '' I was afraid I would have to say good-bye to them too. ''
'' Of course not, Bella, '' Jasper smiled. '' They are a part of this family too. ''
'' How long will we stay in Alaska? '' Bella asked in general. '' And what about school? ''
'' You'll go to a new school, '' Alice informed her. '' Just like the rest of us. ''
'' Where will you go then? I thought all of you had finished already? ''
'' We will start over again, '' Alice answered. '' We'll go back to High School. ''
Rosalie let out a frustrated sigh and Bella turned around. '' Does that make you sad, mom? ''
'' No, '' Rose answered with a shake of her head. '' I'm annoyed. ''
'' Why? '' Bella seemed confused.
It was clear from her expression that she hadn't realized how many times we have gone to High School. I wasn't exactly looking forward to it either, but what else was there? We couldn't disappear from society for a few years anymore. Bella needed to go to school, so we needed to keep playing the same roles over and over until she was old enough to leave high school herself.
'' Because we've all been to High School many, many times and it gets boring, '' Rosalie explained.
'' But it's a necessary evil, '' she continued. '' Especially now that we have you. We can't just disappear for a few years anymore. You need to go to school. And it would look strange if none of us went to school despite being teenagers. If all of us pretended to be home schooled we would just draw unnecessary attention to ourselves and that's exactly what we don't want. It safer for us to seem as normal as possible. ''
Bella nodded and it looked like she wanted to say something, but Alice cut her off.
'' To answer your questions, '' Alice said. '' We will probably stay there until we have all finished High School again. Four years, give or take. Unless we are forced to move on before that. ''
'' Why would that happen? '' Bella asked. She seemed curious now.
'' Sometimes humans start to suspect that we are different, '' Alice explained. '' Usually it doesn't happen, but sometimes it does. We always move on before they can figure out what we really are.''
She smiled before she continued. '' And to answer your other question. You'll go to another school. We've already found you one. I'm sure you'll love it there. You can make new friends. ''
'' I'm not sure I want to, '' Bella mumbled and I frowned.
'' Why not, Bella? '' I asked, as curious as ever about the inner workings of the only mind in the world that was concealed from me.
'' Because I'll just have to say good-bye again in a few years, '' she explained. '' Maybe it's better if I don't make any friends at all. ''
'' Oh, sweetheart, '' Esme said before I had a chance to respond. '' You shouldn't think like that. ''
'' But it's the truth, '' Bella mumbled, afraid to look at her mother.
'' No, it isn't, Bella, '' Emmett interjected. '' Saying good-bye is a part of life. People come and go, but that doesn't mean you can't have a great time with them. ''
'' Emmett's right, Bella, '' Alice agreed. '' We don't want you to be alone. ''
'' I'm not alone, '' Bella said with a shake of her head. '' I have all of you. ''
'' Bella, '' I sighed. It broke my heart that she felt this way. She was closing herself off, because she didn't want to get hurt again. '' Don't ever think like that, please. It makes me sad. ''
Bella bit her lip again. '' I'm sorry. ''
'' Bella, don't worry so much, '' Alice said, trying to sound cheerful. '' You'll meet a lot of new people and it's going to be great! I'm sure of it. And I'm always right. ''
Bella laughed a little at that.
'' Just think of it as a brand new adventure, '' Alice continued. She seemed to get excited by the idea herself. '' And you should never walk away from a good adventure. ''
'' You're right, '' Bella agreed and she smiled a genuine smile. '' I'm just sad to leave my friends behind. I wished that they could come with me on my new adventure, but I know that that's impossible. I'm also sad to leave our home behind, because it's such a nice home. I'll miss it. ''
'' So will we, angel, '' Carlisle said as he rubbed the tops of her arms gently. '' But I'm sure you're going to love our new home. It's a great house after all. ''
Bella smiled at him and suddenly turned her head back to look at Alice and narrowed her eyes.
'' Is that why you've been gone so much? '' She asked.
'' Yup, '' Alice answered, extremely excited now. '' Esme and I have been working on our new home. It's almost finished! ''
Rose cleared her throat and threw Alice a pointed stare.
'' And Rose has been helping a little too, '' Alice amended with a roll of her eyes. '' This house is even bigger than the one we live in now! '' she continued. '' More land and all that. ''
Bella's eyes almost rolled out of her head. '' What? '' she gasped. '' But our house is huge! Why do we need an even bigger one? That's ridiculous! ''
'' Of course it's not ridiculous, Bella! '' Alice huffed. '' I need more space. ''
'' For what? '' Bella exclaimed, indignant now.
'' Clothes, duh! '' Alice said, as if this was obvious. And I guess it was. For someone who could predict the future herself, Alice was a very predictable person. Even if I weren't able to read her mind I would have been able to predict her every move and answer.
Bella rolled her eyes too and sighed with a shake of her head. '' You're terrible. '' She then turned to look at Emmett and grinned. '' Em, you know what that means, don't you? ''
Emmett looked a little nonplussed. '' Eh, no? ''
'' More Christmas trees, '' Bella laughed. Emmett let out a booming laugh of his own and wrung his hands together.
'' I can feel another bet coming on, '' he announced, his mischievous grin back in place.
'' Don't even think about it! '' Rose growled and at that we all had to laugh.
'' It may sound a little strange, '' Bella said when she had caught her breath again. '' Because I do feel sad about leaving. But I'm actually looking forward to moving now. I guess I can be happy anywhere as long as I'm with all of you. ''
'' Awh, baby! '' Rose said, her previous irritation with Emmett forgotten.
'' Well, good! '' Alice laughed. '' But don't worry. You won't be sad for long, because tomorrow we'll go shopping again! ''
Bella pulled a face at that and I chuckled. Alice was terrible at cheering Bella up, but I was glad that she seemed to take it so well. She was sad, of course, but I had known that all along. That's why I had been so reluctant to tell her. I didn't want to make her sad. I wanted to make her happy. I hated it when I had to take things away from her. But she took it a lot better than I had expected. I remembered Rose's words from earlier and smiled.
You are already so much stronger than you give yourself credit for.
And not just that. She was already so much stronger than I gave her credit for. I always seemed to underestimate her and she never ceased to amaze me.
'' Oh, and Bella, '' Alice added, her usual happy self. '' I've already decided the best way for you to say good-bye to your friends and our home. ''
'' Yes? '' Bella asked warily, as if she was afraid to hear the answer. I couldn't blame her for that one.
'' We'll throw an amazing going-away party! '' Alice exclaimed, throwing her arms out.
Bella groaned at that. '' Just what I was dreading, '' she murmured, but we all heard her with perfect clarity.
'' You'll love it! '' Alice continued, untroubled by Bella's lack of enthusiasm. It wouldn't make a difference anyway. If Alice had decided on something, nothing and no one could dissuade her.
'' Sure I will, '' Bella said, her tone patronizing and exasperated. I shook my head and chuckled. Bella knew better than to start an argument with Alice.
'' I've already sent everyone an invitation, '' Alice added gleefully.
Bella raised an eyebrow at that. '' You mean to say that my friends already know that we're moving away? You told them before you told me? ''
'' Well, yeah, '' Alice said, a little sheepish now. '' I sent the invitations last week. We had planned on telling you sooner, but things... happened. ''
Alice didn't need to explain that one. Bella seemed to understand too.
'' I see, '' she murmured.
'' Not to worry, not to worry, '' Alice said, recovering her good mood at lightning speed. '' The only thing left to do is find you a great party outfit! ''
Bella wrinkled her nose in disgust, but stay silent nevertheless.
'' I'll save you again if she gets carried away, '' I stage whispered with a wink. Bella grinned at me and winked back.
I heard Alice growl, but that only fueled my desire to laugh.
'' It's inevitable, '' Bella laughed. '' I'm glad when this week is over and we can go home. Shopping with you is literally hell on earth. '' She flashed Alice a toothy grin.
'' I haven't given up on you yet, '' Alice grumbled. '' Someday you'll love it. ''
'' I wouldn't count on it, '' Bella laughed.
Alice threw her a satisfied smirk. '' Don't bet against me, little sis, '' she said. '' I'm always right. ''
A crazy shop-aholic Alice, Bella convincing her family that she wants to learn how to fight and the news that they really need to move. Another full chapter, I think. I hope it lived up to your expectations. The next chaper will be the good-bye party that Alice is throwing and their actual move to Alaska. What do you guys think? And what are you looking forward to next? Please let me know your thoughts, good or bad, and leave me a review. I'm back on track and already writing the next chapter. I'm not going to make any promises, because I never seem to be able to keep them, but I won't leave you guys hanging for months again. I hated it. I missed this story too and I'm also curious what's going to happen next. Because- truth be told - I always seem to surprise myself as well. I never know what's going to happen next until I write it. That's why I love this story so much. It's just my imagination running it's course. Well - I promise to update as soon as possible!
TTFN! XXX