Ok these next two chapters are like the most angst filled chapters in this verse so just a warning. I doubt it will get any more angsty than this. Just remember this is only temporary and things will get better soon so just bear with me…This Flashback and the next chapter is what I was talking about a few chapters ago when I asked if you would be ok with the angst…so here it is! lol
Flashback
~ 2019 ~
It was a Thursday night, little Sofia was tucked away fast asleep in bed while her two mommies...well they were in bed too but they definitely weren't sleeping.
Brittany was on her back with Santana on top of her and three fingers knuckle deep inside her wife.
Brittany covered her mouth with her hand to muffle out the sound Sofia was a light sleeper they were hoping she would grow out of that and were waiting for the Lopez genes to kick in. The ones that would make her able to sleep through a hurricane and make her want to sleep in all day long. Well not so much that last part.
Santana kept up her fast rhythm as she paid loving attention to Brittany's chest in one specific spot actually. She hadn't left that spot alone for a while now and her thrusts were becoming a little slower and kind of intermediate Brittany was not happy about that.
"San? Why are you stopping?" The blonde complained.
Santana didn't answer she had now stopped all movement and brought her hands up to Brittany's chest feeling around. Brittany was a little confused and then a little concerned when she could hear her wife start mumbling
"No, no, no, no please god no"
"San?" Brittany asked a little louder
Santana looked up with tears in her eyes
"There's a lump" she all but choked out.
Santana and Brittany sat in the hospital waiting room neither of them had said a word since they dropped Sofia off at Quinn and Rachel's they had told them they had an appointment with one of Santana's clients and they wanted to meet her wife.
Brittany moved her hand over to Santana's lap and linked her pinkie with her wife's. A little startled by the movement Santana looked up at the blonde sitting next to her. She tried to give her a comforting smile but she just couldn't.
"A Mrs. Brittany Lopez-Pierce?" The doctor called out
Santana's breath hitched. Brittany stood up and gently tugged on her wife's hand to get her to move. They slowly entered the room and took a seat.
"Hi I'm Doctor Strauss what can I do for you today" she asked
"There's a lump" Was all Brittany said
"A lump? Whereabouts?" the doctor asked
Brittany told her and then showed her all the while Santana kept a tight hold on her pinkie. She tried to listen to what the doctor was telling them but all Santana could focus on were the words she never wanted to hear. Words like biopsy, tests, cancer...it was all too much for her.
That afternoon Brittany had a biopsy and they were told they'd have to wait up to a week for the results.
The ride home was like the ride to the hospital a horrible silence filled the car with both women off in their own heads. They picked Sofia up and headed home. Brittany took Sofia up to her room and didn't come back down. Santana sat in the kitchen completely numb.
Brittany didn't want anyone else to know. Not before they got the results back.
The day after the biopsy neither one of them talked about it. It was as if it didn't happen they just went about their day. Santana went to work and Brittany took Sofia to the park to feed the duckies.
The second day was the same as well as the third.
The fourth day however, Brittany decided to go out so she left Sofia home with Santana. The blonde didn't tell her wife where she was going which just made Santana nervous.
After driving for just under two hours Brittany pulled up to a small house with a stereotypical white picket fence and little rose bushes that lined the footpath that led to the front door.
Before Brittany could knock the door opened to reveal a very worried Judy Fabray. Brittany had called her and told her she needed someone to talk too.
The two blondes sat in the living room with cups of tea as Judy waited for Brittany to start talking.
"I had to have a biopsy" was all she said
Judy was a bit shocked then she looked worried
"What for?"
"They think...they think it might be breast cancer" She whispered.
Judy's heart sank and prayed to god that she had misheard her. But her prayers weren't answered when she saw the few tears beginning to fall. Judy moved quickly and wrapped her arms around the blonde.
"Hey...shhh it's ok, Britt...it'll be ok. Medicine has come a long way in the last few years and anyway I'm sure it's nothing" Judy rambled.
"I'm scared" Brittany whispered
"I know sweetie...does Sanny know?"
"She found the lump when we were having sex. But she doesn't know that I'm scared. We haven't talked about it"
"Why not?"
"Because if I tell her I'm scared she'll lose it. I know she tries to act all tough and strong but she's not. This is killing her. I don't want her to worry anymore then she already is"
"Sweetie that's very noble of you but she's your wife. You need to tell her how you're feeling."
Brittany and Judy spent the rest of the afternoon talking when she came home she was going to have a talk with Santana but when she walked in to the living room and found her wife laughing hysterically as she played with their daughter she just couldn't bring her down.
It was around 11pm that night when Santana snuck out of bed trying not to wake up her wife and grabbed her secret bottle of whiskey and headed outside.
The Latina walked out the back and sat under the big tree that was soon to be home to Sofia's tree house when Santana got the time to build it. She popped open the lid and took a big swig of the alcohol.
She hadn't been out there long when she heard some commotion from next door. It was Quinn, she was grumbling about having to take out the trash and that she could have just done it in the morning but no Rachel wanted it done that night.
Santana tried not to make any noise she didn't want Quinn to know she was there but Whisky always gave her the hiccups.
"San?" Quinn asked through the fence
"No" the Latina mumbled
"Are you drunk?"
"No" she slurred
Quinn hopped the fence and hovered over the brunette.
"What are you doing out here drinking alone? Why wasn't I invited?" She chuckled
Santana didn't bother to reply
"Are you ok?" Quinn asked a little concerned
Once again Santana didn't reply she just looked away distantly.
"What's wrong?" she asked getting worried
Quinn took a seat next to her friend something was definitely wrong when Santana didn't even flinch or snarl when Quinn put her arm around her.
"Ok, you're scaring me now. What's going on? Did something happen?"
"I'm so scared Quinn" she finally said before she burst into tears.
Santana clung onto Quinn's side as her friend did her best to comfort her. She had never seen her like this before not even when her patents disowned her.
"What are you scared of?"
"We found a lump...Britt...Brittany could have breast cancer" Santana finally reviled
Quinn was shocked. She was speechless
"I can't lose her Q, I can't live with her not by my side. I can't be a single mom...Oh god Ducky...she can't lose her mommy Quinn...I can't lose her." Santana cried
Swallowing her own tears Quinn did her best to calm her down
"We don't know if it's cancer...it could be nothing." She tried to comfort her
"But what if it is? I can't...I'm not strong enough to handle that"
"Bull...you are strong San, if it is cancer you will do everything for Brittany to make her better. You know that, I know that, she knows that. Heck even the mailman knows that!"
Santana just shook her head; Quinn grabbed her face in both hands to make her stop.
"Hey! Look at me...you and Brittany will get through this no matter what the test results say. You understand me?"
Santana reluctantly nodded
"Good" Quinn sighed
She lent in and kissed her then kissed her on the forehead.
"She's gonna be fine San...she'll be fine" She told her trying to convince her and also herself.
The day they went back to the hospital to get the results was the day that Santana and Brittany's world crashed around them. The results were positive. Brittany had cancer.