Void

by Sereneffect

Adjusting from being dead to suddenly being a live again is jarring, but even more so is seeing someone you mourned return. And yet the hardest is seeing how you both have changed. So, you must find a way to rely on one another for strength. Rated for violence, language, and mature situations. FemShepxGarrus. (New New Summary)

25. Chapter 25

So for those of you who are still with me, I owe you my sincerest apologies and an explanation.

In February, I ended a two and a half year relationship, and it basically destroyed me for almost two months. I had no inspiration and I had no desire to do anything other than sleep.

Since then, I have reevaluated a lot of the things in my life, and now I'm doing a lot better. I've completed all of the fieldwork for my undergraduate thesis and will be doing my analysis this summer. I've also started spending a lot more time with my friends, and doing whatever makes me happy. Including writing!

And so with that, I HUMBLY apologize for the fact that this took over 6 months to write, and thank you for sticking with me through all of this.

And I owe a huge thank you to Greenyoda987 for staying up with me when I would text her in tears, and for giving me the encouragement to keep working on this stuff.

---

Mnemosyne was a glowing orange orb of menace, crouched like a beast ready to pounce in the shadow of a shape Shepard had come to fear inherently. The Reaper hung listlessly on the edge of the planet's pull, its limbs dangling limply where its final throws had left them. It gave Shepard chills. Something had incapacitated it… Shepard wished she knew what... But they had more important things to do, like get its IFF.

Shepard stepped back from the galaxy map and started back for the elevator. "Chambers, please have Tali and Garrus waiting for me in the airlock. I'll be down shortly," she said as she got on. In the silence of the elevator, she sighed, rubbing her eyes tiredly. She didn't trust the Illusive Man—or his intel—after his last stunt, but she had no choice. She had to rely on his resources. Assuming the scientists were even still alive… if no one had heard from them, Shepard shuddered to think of what could have happened to the team. She huffed out a breath and stalked into her cabin, heading straight for her armor locker; as she started snapping on the plates of her armor, she couldn't help but worry. This was a Reaper they were willingly walking into. Saren had become indoctrinated in one and tried to take over the galaxy with an army of geth to bring them back. And they were voluntarily doing the same thing? As she tightened her ammo belt, she scowled. This was the stuff nightmares were made of… Dead Reapers reaching beyond the grave, indoctrination… Every part of her screamed in protest to what she was about to do, but she had no other choice. She sighed and flexed her hands in her gauntlets, starting back for the elevator again. Yet as she pressed her thumb to the button for the CIC, the ship rocked violently and she staggered, catching herself on the wall.

"Joker! Status report!" she barked as the elevator dropped. The ship pitched again and she stumbled backwards, slamming into the opposite wall.

"Mnemosyne's gravitational pull," the pilot ground out, "Reaper's just on the edge of it. I'm trying to keep us out of it but… It's a big planet."

Shepard scowled as the doors opened and ran up the gangway, intent on the cockpit. The Normandy jerked and she stumbled, grabbing Joker's chair for support. "So all this chop?"

"Doing my best. Winds are gusting over 500 kph, so this is the best I can do." The ship rattled and shook as they drew closer and Joker grimaced. "There's a second ship alongside the Reaper; it's not transmitting any IFF, but the ladar paints it as geth."

Shepard's brow furrowed and she tried to catch sight of it through the cockpit windows. "Geth?" What the hell were the geth doing here? Hadn't they caused enough trouble?! And what could they possibly want with a dead Reaper? The geth threat was supposedly over – even she hadn't given much thought to the connection between them and the Reapers since Saren was killed…

"Yeah. Guess we know why the science team stopped reporting…"

Probably accurate, yet something about all of this rubbed Shepard the wrong way… Cerberus science team mysteriously goes missing aboard a Reaper, and the geth are involved? It was too… convenient. Like a crippled Collector ship… All of a sudden, the Normandy went still, gliding smoothly toward the Reaper and Shepard cautiously straightened. "What just happened?"

"The Reaper's mass effect fields are still active. We just passed inside their envelope," Joker murmured, guiding the Normandy in close. "Eye of the hurricane, huh?"

Shepard nodded and turned, walking out of the cockpit. "Unfortunately… That means it can only get worse."

Joker paused, looking back as she started for the airlock. "Hey, Shepard? Don't worry so much. It'll be fine." He smirked and tugged on the brim of his hat. "Besides, you got the best pilot in the galaxy. Combine that with… whatever it is you do, and you're set!"

As he sat there smiling, Shepard couldn't help but return it with her own small one. "Yeah, yeah. Take us in, nice and easy. And Joker… thanks." She could pretend to be cross with him all she liked, but it didn't change the fact that his unsuppressed humor made her feel like nothing had ever changed…. that she'd never died.

"You got it."

Shepard stepped into the airlock and took a deep breath as the doors closed behind her. Tali nodded in greeting, checking something on her omnitool as Garrus fussed with his rifle. "We know why we're here," she finally said, exhaustion creeping into her voice, "But the only thing we really know about this is that we don't know what we're dealing with. Anything could happen in there. We don't even know what happened to the science team."

Garrus's mandibles twitched. "I don't like this Shepard… The Illusive Man didn't give us the whole story on the Collector ship, and I doubt he's given us the whole story now." And he remembered what Cerberus had done before Shepard had died: their brutal experiments and tests… What was to stop them from having done the same thing to their own science team?

"Agreed," Shepard sighed, unholstering her pistol.

"Who knows what could have happened in there…" Tali murmured nervously, "I mean, anything is possible with Reaper tech…"

"Exactly. So we take it slow. No unnecessary risks until we know what we're dealing with." The external doors slid open, revealing the sterile white docking tube and Shepard started forward. "Stay close and watch for anything. Someone from the science team might still be alive."

Garrus fell in beside Tali, following Shepard aboard. The sleep-addled part of his brain didn't know what to make of her new insistence on caution, but he kept the thought to himself, clenching his jaw tight. If she wanted to be careful, he wasn't going to stop her—it was what he'd wanted, after all—but he desperately wanted to ask her about it. After the mission. Finish the mission first. Shepard stopped short and in his preoccupation, he ran into her. They both staggered, but he caught her arm before she fell, grabbing the wall for support. As he helped her regain her footing, he realized that the spot on the wall he had braced his hand on was smeared with blood and he took a startled step back. Tali gasped as Shepard bent to examine the bodies sprawled on the floor below.

"They've been dead a while…" Shepard mumbled, getting back to her feet. "I'd say we know what happened to the science team." Within the Reaper, knowing the geth were lurking somewhere, she was almost glad. The dead can't hurt you.

Garrus gave the wall one last suspect glance before following again. "Exploring an abandoned area, waiting for something mechanical and nasty to jump out at you… Just like old times."

Shepard chuckled in spite of herself and even Tali let out a quiet giggle. "It is, isn't it?" Deep down, she wanted it to be like old times—their friendship, their lives, the ship—but a small part of herself, a vocal part, cried out for the loss of what had happened since. And she had to admit, she liked that voice a lot more than she had any right to admit. Mentally, she shook the thought away and turned her attention outward again. It was like old times, a reminder of who they had been before any of this had happened. It was almost pleasant… If only they weren't, you know, inside a Reaper. She led the way further into the corridors Cerberus had set up, pausing in front of a console that flickered on and off. "Tali, can you recover anything from this? Any clue about what happened here?"

The quarian slipped past her and began tapping anxiously at her omnitool, scanning and rescanning the terminal before finally stepping back. "There's an audio log. Everything else is scrambled and basically useless, but…" She flipped the file open and held out her arm so they could all hear.

"Th-th-the airlock was successfully inst-st-stalled at the far end of the h-holed s-s-s-s-section. We ha-have begun pressuriz-zation for shirtsleeves w-w-work."

Dr. Chandana, it had to be. The recording was messy, cutting and skipping, but it was clear enough as he continued.

"The crew is e-e-edgy. I assured th-them it is mere nerves. A superstitious re-reaction to what—what this hulk represents: the corpse of a—a vast, ancient l-l-life fo-o-orm. Privately, I ca-can't deny the atmosph-phere. The angles of the walls…" Static interrupted and Tali grumbled something before fiddling with the recording. "… f-find myself clench-ch-ching my teeth."

For a second, no one spoke as the recording cut off and faded to white noise. Shepard had to wonder if they had even known what they had been getting into.

"If I can find another console, I might be able to complete the log, Shepard," Tali suggested helpfully, nodding toward the rest of the ship. Garrus had to agree: if they were going to be running around inside the Reaper, he wanted to know what had happened to the people who had been there before them.

"Alright. But we take it slow," Shepard cautioned, casting a wary eye around the ship. Everything about being within the Reaper set her on edge; Saren had been indoctrinated inside a Reaper, who was to say the same wouldn't happen to them… She tried to shake that thought from her head once again, but it wouldn't budge.

Tali trotted ahead, tapping excitedly at a flickering console ahead of them. Shepard debated calling her back—taking it slow meant sticking together—but held her tongue. Tali was still young by comparison—a fact she frequently forgot—and she was merely excited. A video feed crackled to life and Shepard came up alongside the quarian, Garrus two steps behind her.

"—finished cataloging samples…" Static overtook the audio and Tali grumbled something under her breath. "No evidence of active nanotechnology noted." Another burst of static cut through and Shepard could feel the frustration rolling off her young friend.

"Easy, Tali. If it's too damaged—"

"I can make it work, Shepard." Tali bent further over her omnitool and Garrus let out an uneasy chuckle.

"Come on, Shepard, you know it's all about her pride now. Can't have Cerberus files being beyond her capabilities…"

"Hey Garrus. Shut up," Tali retorted. With a triumphant whoop, she activated the console again.

"—believes they would have decayed over the last 37 million years." The scientist on screen—disfigured by dead pixels—scoffed. "There's not enough evidence to support his claim."

Shepard's jaw clenched and her grip on her pistol tightened; she could feel her gauntlets creak in protest. Nanites… Is that how they thought the Reapers did it? Her throat felt gravelly as she swallowed. Would they know if the nanobots had gotten inside of them? Would they feel it? She ground her teeth absently, suddenly all too aware of the thrum of cybernetics beneath her skin. A gentle hand settled on her shoulder and she jumped, half-turning toward the source with one arm raised. Garrus took a half step back, hands up in a placating manner; he blinked at her in mild surprise and she deflated slightly, arms dropping to her sides. Sorry, she mouthed as the recording started up again.

"—asserts that the truth is 'patently obvious'. I am… conc—" the audio cut out in a snap of feedback, but before Tali could begin swearing at it again, it returned with a roar. "—been staring at the samples for hours. He says he's 'listening' to them."

For a moment, they stood in silence as the screen went dark before Shepard sighed, turning away with a sniff of disdain. "Come on," she mumbled, stepping around her squad to jerk open the medigel dispenser on the wall, "we still don't…" She trailed off, staring in confusion at the numerous packets that fell into her hands, and her brow furrowed. The science team had clearly met an unfortunate end—the bodies were enough to tell them that—yet no one had used any of the medigel… Something was extremely wrong.

"Shepard?" Garrus's simple question jerked her out of her own head and she hurriedly shoved the packets into her suit's compartments. "Looks like this door leads into the rest of the Reaper… if you're ready…" Something about her was off, something had her on-edge enough to really rattle her. Before any of this, he would have thought nothing could rattle Shepard, but now… He was worried. Being inside a Reaper made him uncomfortable, sure, but Shepard… Saren had been implanted by Sovereign and lost all control. Shepard already had the implants… What would it take for a Reaper to take control of them? What if it was already happening? He could have mapped the tension running down her neck and shoulders with one look, and it worried him.

She forced a small smile onto her face, but in the reflection of Tali's helmet, she could see that it was closer to a grimace than any reassuring expression. "As I'll ever be…" She lifted her omnitool toward the lock, keying up the bypass module with a few twitches of her fingers.

As soon as the interface touched the lock, the ship pitched violently and the small squad stumbled. Steam hissed from the straining pipes in the ceiling and the whole ship seemed to groan in protest to their exploratory advances. Tali inched closer to Shepard's back, shotgun held close to her chest and Garrus let out a low growl, scanning along the gangway ahead of them.

"Normandy to shore party!" Joker's voice boomed over the comm, making them all start again.

Shepard slowly straightened her stance, reaching up to press the unit in her ear; she could feel her hands shaking as adrenaline pumped and coursed through her body. "What just happened, Joker?" she asked thickly, trying to take a long breath through her nose. Don't panic. It's just a Reaper… Just a Reaper… That train of thought wasn't helping. She could feel her squad looking at her and forced on her cool Commander mask; Garrus, of course, seemed to see through it and flexed a brow ridge at her. A sharp gesture with her hand and she focused back on her pilot's voice in her ear.

"Reaper threw up barriers," he groused, and she could hear the beeping of his controls, "I don't think we can get through from our side."

Garrus scowled at her sharp dismissal, but said nothing, settling his rifle more comfortably into the crook of his arm. She needed him to support her and watch her back, and he would. He would help her however he could until they were safely back on the ship. Then they could talk.

"Then we're trapped!" Tali squeaked. Shepard tried not to stiffen at that thought.

"Not so fast. There's got to be a way out of here," Garrus cut in, looking between them. Yet even as he said it, Shepard could see the anxious twitch of his mandibles, and the way his eyes were far too wide. "Right?"

"Everybody just… calm down…" Shepard forced out, pressing her free palm to her forehead. "Maybe… We can blast our way out, with the Thanix…" She growled something nondescript and clenched her hand into a fist, her pistol shaking in her vice grip. "No, we'd get sucked out the vacuum…"

"If I may make a suggestion?" EDI interjected, her voice a cool antithesis to Shepard's inner conflict.

"Please."

"A kinetic barrier can only be produced by a mass effect generator. That is true for any ship, even a Reaper."

Immediately, the gears began turning and Tali perked up; talk about tech and how to exploit it, and she was all ears. "If we shut it down, then we can get out."

"Precisely," EDI replied, "At the moment of activation, I detected a heat spike in what is likely the wreck's mass effect core."

Shepard nodded slowly, letting out a long breath. More than anything, she wanted her heart to stop pounding, wanted her blood to stop rushing through her skull. She wanted to think clearly, without the weight of Cerberus's meddling and the Reaper's power and the bizarre, barely tangible tension within her squad. "Send the coordinates, EDI. We'll handle it."

"Be advised, Shepard: the mass effect core is also what is maintaining the Reaper's altitude," EDI added hastily.

"So… when we take the barriers down," Garrus mumbled from behind her shoulder, "the wreck falls into the planet core."

"And that means everyone dies, yeah I got it," Joker snapped.

Shepard felt the blood drain from her face and a finger of icy chill slide down her spine. Plummeting into Mnemosyne's core… Would it be the same as her fall to Alchera? Would it hurt? Would she even know if it—She shook her head quickly. "You'll just have to pull off some dashing heroics to pull us out," she replied; her intention had been to aim for levity, yet her voice shook and whatever effect she had been hoping for fell flat. "We'll sweep for survivors and research data on our way to the IFF. If we're lucky, the scientists found something useful."

"Just… be ready to pick us up, Joker," Tali added, "Being sucked into a brown dwarf isn't on the mission agenda."

"And we all know how strictly we adhere to that," Garrus mumbled.

"Aw, cheer up, Garrus," Joker replied as Shepard rolled her eyes, "Maybe this time you'll get lucky!"

"We're going in. Keep the Normandy ready," Shepard cut in, shooting her squad a meaningful look.

"Good hunting!"

The comm went silent and she sighed, looking out over the open gangways ahead of them. It was an uncovered and vulnerable position, with dozens of vantage points that could sight down on them. What was Cerberus thinking, setting it up like this? She took the first steps into the exposed, cavernous space, pistol raised; her squad—her friends—followed close behind, and it was the reassuring presence of their guns at her back that kept her moving forward. Her boot slipped on a sticky splotch of… Her stomach turned at the smear of nearly-black, congealed blood that came from under her foot. Bodies—in worse shape than the ones they'd seen just inside the airlock—looked as though they'd been kicked to the side of the platform, streaks of blood marking where they'd been pushed.

"You'd think Cerberus would have taken better care of their own dead…" Garrus murmured from beside her, kneeling down to check the bodies. They were extensively decayed, almost beyond recognition, and he couldn't make out any fatal wounds. There were patches where skin had been stripped away on the fingers and hands and… He lifted one of the arms, examining the fingertips. Had they been trying to claw their way out?

"We know what they're really like, Garrus," she replied, barely above a whisper, "We shouldn't expect anything less, but… It just seems odd… Who moved the bodies? Why not put them all together?"

"Why does Cerberus do anything?" Tali's voice was laced with bitterness and Shepard gave her shoulder a squeeze. She understood.

"We should keep moving," Shepard finally said, stepping back from the grisly mess and turning toward their goal, "There looks to be another console, if—"

"I got it."

Garrus looked up as they moved on, but didn't immediately join them. There wasn't enough smeared blood for the dearly departed to have been clawing anywhere on the nearby surfaces. So where… He turned the head of the body he was examining and nearly fell backwards. The flesh of the face, even before decomposition, had been stripped away in ribbons, claw marks and punctures cutting into the muscle and tissue beneath. One eye had swollen and clouded as the flesh died, yet the other was gone, the oculus nerve hanging limply from the socket. The lips had been shredded, baring the entirety of the teeth and gums. They hadn't died trying to claw their way free… They'd died trying to remove their own faces by hand. Why in the name of the Spirits…

"Garrus, you coming?" Tali called back to him, jarring him from his stupor.

"Yeah…" Even as he turned away from the scene, he still felt as if there was something… cold, sinister watching him walk away. Garrus felt his shoulder's tense, hunching forward instinctively as he joined them around the console. Shepard arched a brow in a silent question, but said nothing as he snapped his mandibles back to his face.

"Well, what've we got, Tali?" the Commander asked quietly as the quarian stepped back from the terminal.

"Surveillance footage, it looks like. But it was flagged as suspicious in the administrative back-ups." Shepard could hear her frown as she continued, "But there isn't any note as to why."

"Play it."

Two men flickered onto the screen, yet their relaxed stances didn't match the unease in the set of their faces.

"You never said you were married," one said in utter disbelief.

The other man nodded, glancing over his shoulder at something off screen. "Yeah, Katy had anger management issues," he murmured, "When my brother got married, the best man tried to hit on her. She kicked him down the church steps."

The first man frowned, crossing his arms stiffly. "Wait… No… no, that can't be right. Katy's my wife. I… I must have told you that story."

Shepard felt her stomach drop, seeing them turning as if to listen to voices only they could hear. Saren had done the same thing on Virmire…

"No, no… I know my wife," the second man insisted, wringing his hands, "I remember… That day was the only time I saw her wear stockings."

"Yeah… The kind with the seams up the back, I… I remember it too…" He pressed his finger to his forehead, lips pressed in a thin line. "What the hell is this?" He asked, panic creeping into his voice, "How can we remember the same thing?!"

The screen clicked to black and Shepard let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Tali fidgeted awkwardly at her side, and she could hear the uneasy hum coming from Garrus as she took a step back.

"It… sounds like the Reaper was beginning to affect their minds…" he murmured, glancing sidelong at Shepard. Her jaw was tight and the color had drained from her face; at her sides, her fists shook and she could feel the chapped skin of her knuckles threatening to crack open and bleed. When she didn't respond, he reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder; he knew she was still uncertain of the state of her own mind—she'd confessed as much in a brief moment of vulnerability—that she was certain Cerberus had left parts of her out. How could she know that she wasn't destined to the same fate as these scientists? Weren't they one of Cerberus's projects, just like she was? "Shepard?"

She jumped, breathing heavily through her nose, but forced her fingers to open and licked her suddenly-dry lips. "I'm fine… I'm fine. Let's just… keep going." She started down the gangway before either of her friends could question her, trying to outrun the feel of cool fingers on the back of her skull. You're not like that. It's different. They started mixing up their memories, you just… don't have any. She snapped off the safety of her pistol and slowed her strides as she came up on tanks set along the sides of the walkways. "Careful, these canisters don't look stable," she murmured as Tali came up alongside her. Garrus she trusted to hang back. She knew he would have her back. "Anything could—"

Before she could finish the thought, something wheezed beside her ear and she swore, turning and firing in the same motion as she fell, off-balance, into Tali. The husk's head snapped back, but its fingers still grasped blindly for her; the cool metal tips dragged down the side of her neck as she and Tali stumbled away, leaving the lifeless corpse to fall in a heap beside them. The two women quickly regained their footing, but it was too late. More and more husks crawled up onto the walkway, groaning and moaning as they shambled forward. For a split second, the crack of a rifle firing drowned out the sound of the husks' advance and Shepard shoved Tali back behind the nearest tank rig.

"Tali, get me a drone out there," she forced out, trying to hide the tremor in her voice as she stepped back out to face the growing mob of turned scientists. She could see remnants of Cerberus uniforms still clinging to the disfigured bodies, and tufts of hair forming macabre patchworks on their faintly glowing skulls. She fired off three more shots and the nearest husk dropped to its knees, but still tried to drag itself forward on its arms. Its mouth hung agape, tubes and wires forcing its jaws wide. Another crack of rifle fire and it went still, the high caliber bullet leaving a yawning hole in its chest. "Tali!"

"I'm trying! There's… interference. I think it's coming from the—"

Her sentence cut off with a startled yelp and Shepard spun, biotics crackling to life. Tali was holding a husk back by its face with one hand, and was struggling to get her shotgun up. With a yell, Shepard grabbed the husk with one hand and forced her biotically charged fist through its chest. As the body dropped, she let out a long breath and helped Tali to her feet.

"Work through it. We'll hold them off. Right?"

"Right," Garrus replied through the comm, hanging back at the top of the walkway. He fired again, watching as the husk that had been coming up on Shepard's back fell. "I'd recommend finishing this conversation later."

Shepard nodded, giving Tali's shoulder a quick squeeze before turning back. Husks weren't fast, but now there were lots of them, and they were way too close for Shepard's liking. Her mouth set in a thin line, she stalked forward, gun raised. Shot after shot flew from the barrel of her gun, bullets finding homes in chests, stomachs, and necks as she advanced. Rifle fire rounded out the symphony of battle, punctuating the thrum of mass effect fields ripping atoms apart.

When silence finally filled the air, Shepard cautiously snapped her pistol to her hip and started back toward Tali. "What's going on?"

The quarian huffed out a breath and shrugged. "I don't know. Something is blocking any sort of remote command signal. The Reaper…" She forced her hands to still and tried again. "I think the Reaper… might still be active."

Garrus trotted down the walkway to regroup with them as Shepard took a step back. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Shepard snapped quickly, turning away, "Nothing." Not nothing… She couldn't admit it. If she said it out loud, it seemed more true. The Reaper couldn't still be active… The Illusive Man wasn't that cold… Was he? Her skull felt like it was about to split open as she thought about it. How else had it put up barriers? Or converted the scientists? That was one thing they had gotten out of the mission: the technology to make husks definitely came from the Reapers. Fucking nanotechnology…

What if it's happening to us now?

Shepard snapped her mouth shut and shook her head. No, no… No way. She pushed the thought back from her mind and nodded toward the path stretching out in front of them. "Let's get moving," she sighed, letting biotics trickle down to her fingertips. She didn't want to think that she had been stage 1 of the Illusive Man's plan to control the Reapers.

Garrus watched her posture as they moved forward, noting the unease with which she advanced. Was she worried? Did she think she was the same as these scientists, that Cerberus would convert her the same way the Reaper had converted them? Her eyes were too wide, her pupil's barely pinpricks of fear. Tali nudged him with her elbow, then indicated Shepard with a jerk of her head and he shrugged. He had no idea what she was thinking. He could guess, but he would never know until she told him. He wished she would.

"Shepard?" Tali tried, reaching out to grab her elbow, but before she could, another husk lunged from behind a crate, arms raised. Shepard threw her arm out, launching a biotic missile into the advancing enemy. It crumbled with a gurgle and Shepard took a few quick steps back, pulling Tali with her.

"Work on the interference, see if you can't break through. I need to know what we're dealing with," she said quickly, ignoring the question in her team's faces. Tali looked ready to argue, but obediently opened her omnitool and got to work, hunching over behind cover as Shepard stood over her. Garrus took up a position beside her, rifle raised.

"I know you're not telling us everything you're thinking," he murmured as he fired the first shot, "But it's bothering you. Talk to me."

She lifted her assault rifle from its holster and steadied it against her shoulder. "It's nothing," she sighed, firing down on the horde coming at them. Not now. Please, not now. What if the Reaper—or Cerberus—could turn her world upside down in an instant? Bullets. Focus on firing bullets.

And she did. For almost thirty seconds, she thought of nothing other than the hot lead she was dispensing upon her enemies; the steady recoil of her gun grounded her in the present as the bodies fell. It was calming, almost, to do nothing but shoot.

"Got it!" Tali whooped beside them and a moment later, her combat drone blinked into existence ahead of them with a screech. Electricity sparked from it, shorting the forced synthetic additions to what remained of the science team. They crumbled, limbs twitching as their cybernetic elements powered down and Garrus chuckled.

"As glad as I am to see it, Tali," he mused as they cautiously moved forward, "does it have to make that noise?" He shot Shepard an expectant look and she indulged him in a smile, but it was forced and unconvincing.

"Joke all you like, bosh'tet, but no one messes with Chatika vas Paus," Tali informed him haughtily as the drone returned to hover by her side. "Now come on, I think there's one more console. Maybe we'll actually get some answers this time."

Shepard didn't move as they approached the terminal, watching her friends' backs with a mix of consternation and worry. What if they didn't get any answers? So far, they'd gotten nothing but more questions, and for Shepard, there was now a lot more doubt. Did she want to know what else had happened here? What if she was watching her own future? She shook herself and reholstered her gun as she trotted up to watch over Tali's shoulder.

The same two men appeared on screen, standing—it seemed—in the same room as they had been before. One gripped his head, grimacing in pain as the other watched with an almost uncaring expression. No, not uncaring… blank. As if he felt nothing, not even curiosity.

"Third day with this headache… You'd think Chandana would let me have a few hours off," the first man grumbled, massaging his temples. But suddenly, he started, hands flying up defensively; his eyes went wide and he took a quick step back. "Damn!"

"What?" the other man asked, checking casually over his shoulder. The concern that anyone else would have expressed was absent, his eyes glassy as he looked around.

"That thing that just… that gray thing!" the first babbled, wringing his hands and fidgeting between his feet. "It disappeared when I looked straight at it. Came out of that damn wall, where we took the panel off!" He pointed off screen but his coworker just shook his head.

"I didn't see anything," he replied calmly, arms limp at his sides, "Maybe you should just… lie down." Something in the way he said it made Shepard and her squad tense, all three glancing at the others as if searching for confirmation that the simple phrase had sounded as… menacing as they thought.

The man's face contorted in anger and he took an aggressive step forward, pointing accusingly at his friend's face. "I'm telling you, this ship isn't dead! It knows we're inside it!"

"Calm down, you—"

"No, no I won't calm down! I—" The feed cut suddenly, leaving static and white noise behind until Tali shut it down. No one moved until Tali put a hand on Shepard's arm, and she started, noting for the first time the ache in her jaw.

"Shepard, are you alright?" the young quarian asked cautiously, but the human woman stepped back, shaking her head.

"Fine, fine, just… A little on edge," she admitted, trying to roll some of the tension out of her neck. "It looks like they were starting to see things. Maybe the Reaper was affecting their minds."

"What, like indoctrination?" Garrus asked, browplates lowering, "You can't be serious, Shepard. It's dead."

But Shepard shook her head, risking a glance back the way they'd come. "We don't know that for sure. If it is, how did the science team end up as husks? What was happening to those men?" She unhooked her pistol and settled its comforting weight into her hands and nodded toward the path ahead of them. "It doesn't make sense, but we're not getting anywhere standing here. Come on, we still need to get that IFF, and—"

Garrus grabbed her arm as she went to move forward and tugged her back. It wasn't hard, but it was enough to throw off her balance and she fell backwards into his chest; for an instant, she was angry and had every mind to turn and give him a piece of her mind—she knew that he knew she was uncomfortable, and she appreciated the thought, but it could wait until after the mission, even if they were friends—but when she saw the bullet fly by, exactly where she had been intent on walking, the reprimand stilled on her tongue. "Sniper," he murmured, still holding on to her arm as she regained her footing, "I didn't see the shooter… Maybe a survivor from the science team?"

"Unlikely," Tali chimed in, creeping forward. She let out a low hum and gestured for them to follow. "Whoever they were, they took out some of the husks for us. Unless they hit them by mistake when they were aiming for us…"

"Personally, I like the first option better," Shepard replied, crouching to examine one of the bodies, "but at this point, it doesn't seem likely. I'm surprised anyone from the science team is even still… Well, you know." A high caliber bullet had punched straight through the back of the husk's skull, leaving a grisly mess of rotted flesh and cybernetic tubes oozing what had to be motor lubricant. Even though the organic host was clearly dead, its body now rendered useless, some of the wires still twitched and circuits still sparked faintly. How was this even possible… How could nanobots—microscopic synthetics—be capable of almost completely converting a living host? Cerberus tried to find out, and look what happened to them… With a grunt, she lurched back to her feet. "Let's keep moving. The longer we stay here, the easier targets we—" She paused, halfway to standing as something caught her attention from the corner of her eye. Crates of munitions, stockpiles of weaponry… A comparative arsenal within easy reach, yet none of it had been touched. Had the science team not fought back? Did they even have a chance? Shepard forced the thought away and straightened, rolling her shoulders back. "Let's just keep moving."

She had slipped by before he could say anything, and Garrus could only follow as she stubbornly trudged further into the ship that seemed to be slowly unravelling her. He recognized the pensive crease of her brow; he had seen it so many times when she would slip into thought during meals. She wasn't there—not one hundred percent—and it worried him. Shepard may get distracted, but it never showed. Not on a mission.

The first husk nearly ripped Shepard's shoulder guard off as she walked by, and Garrus felt his heart stop. For two endless seconds, nothing moved, and his rifle fired without his say so. The husk crumbled, letting the commander stagger free and she scrambled back to his side as more crawled up from beneath the catwalks.

"Thanks," she huffed breathlessly, leaning back against the requisitions crate of some long-dead scientist.

He could only nod, swallowing the choke of relief that nearly suffocated him. It's the Reaper, he kept telling himself, We're all just on edge because it's a Reaper. But were they? He should have seen that husk long before it had laid a hand on Shepard. Shepard should have seen that husk. It was playing tricks on them. It had to be.

Tali yelped, cringing further back behind her sparse cover, one hand pressed tightly to her thigh as she fired at the husk standing over her with the other. A red stain had begun to spread from under her hand and the pistol was beginning to shake in her grip. And the stupidest thought popped into his head: Red? He'd always expected quarian blood to be blue.

Shepard shoved past him, blowing two husks out of her path with a biotic pulse, and slid onto her knees beside her friend. "Tali, Tali listen to me!" The quarian didn't fight as she batted her hand away to slather medigel over the gash. It wasn't deep—she was lucky it hadn't been closer—but it was the subsequent infection that could kill her. "Hey, tell me about that time you and Wrex got locked in the Mako. Remember, Tali?"

Tali let out a startled laugh and sat up a little, shakily keying up her omnitool. "I was afraid he would—" She coughed, but continued tapping commands. "He was so mad."

"I bet." Shepard peaked out from behind their cover and fired a few haphazard shots. One bullet managed to find its target, but her attention was on her friend. "What do we need to fix your suit?" There was a steady, rhythmic crack of rifle fire and Shepard felt a sliver of tension ease from her spine. There was no one else she wanted at her back during a moment like this.

"I've sealed off the tear," she sighed, digging into one of her pockets, "but I need to repair it to purge the area." Her fingers shook as she tried to hold the needle and thread, and Shepard took them from her without resistance.

"What do you mean 'purge'?" Shepard asked, deftly threading the needle and setting about sewing the tear shut. Not a whole lot different than stitching up a field wound. Adrenaline sharpened her focus and she nearly missed what Tali replied with.

"Sterilization protocol. It will eliminate any foreign microbes and seal off the wound to prevent further infection." Tali let her arm droop, but didn't close her omnitool. "Garrus, how many are there?"

Garrus almost didn't hear her too, attention locked on the steady stream of synthetic abominations shambling toward their position. "You've got more important things to deal with right now, Tali."

"Bosh'tet," she grumbled, tapping stubbornly on her omnitool as Shepard tied off the thread. Her drone blinked back to life and zipped away, screeching and sparking angrily at the husks yawning mouths. "Shepard, I need you to solder that tear closed. I can't keep my hand steady."

"That's going to hurt."

For some reason, Tali laughed. "I could die. Just do it."

Shepard had no argument. What could she say? Instead she snapped her mouth shut and flipped open the repair protocol on her omnitool. "How are we doing, Garrus?" she asked anxiously as the spark ignited and she lowered it to the metallic weave. Tali flinched, but didn't pull away and Shepard kept working.

"Well, the husks aren't a problem, there's just a lot of them. But—" He stopped, mandibles snapping tight to his jaw and a colorful curse dropped unbidden from his mouth. "They've got some heavy hitters bringing up the rear." He was talking too fast, his voice pitched just a hair too high. He was afraid. And Shepard knew she was too.

"Keep them off us just a little bit longer." The metal hissed plaintively as it was fused together, and the scent of burning flesh nearly made her gag. "How're we doing, Tali?" She sat back as the last inch of the tear rebonded and Tali sat forward. Her omnitool beeped ominously and she grabbed Shepard's hand; there was a tiny thump, like a muffled gunshot, and her grip on Shepard's fingers tightened, but she didn't say anything.

"Ow," she finally managed, leaning back against their cover again. Her breath came in shallow pants and Shepard gave her shoulder a squeeze.

"Just sit tight, Tali." She jumped over the crates that had kept them hidden and fired a shot through the nearest husk. "Garrus—"

"Right behind you, Shepard."

Damn straight he was. Fear had become her fuel. Panic would get them killed, but fear made her focused. Now, she was present, her distracting thoughts of the Reaper forgotten as they pressed forward, chipping away at the trundling Scion's thick skin. When it finally fell, moaning and groaning and screeching, Shepard let her posture visibly sag and leaned heavily against the rail of the catwalk, looking back to see Tali lurch back to her feet.

"Tali…"

"I'm fine, Shepard," she insisted tightly, favoring her wounded leg as she came to stand beside her commander, "Besides, I can't stay here. We have to find the IFF and bring down that mass effect field. And you need me."

She was right. But that didn't mean Shepard liked it, and Garrus looked just as skeptical as she did. "Fine, but you take it easy. If anything else attacks us, you stay back and provide covering fire, that's it. No heroics."

Medigel supposedly made people… loopy, and as Tali laughed, Shepard began to wonder if they'd used too much. "Wouldn't want to take your job, Shepard."

Garrus laughed before he meant to and saw a smile pull at the corner of Shepard's lip. That was a good sign, and put some of his concerns to rest. She was in there, just… stretched a little too thin.

"Come on," she finally huffed, steering the quarian further into the ship with a one-sided smirk, "we won't find it standing here. Garrus, you take point and—"

They all stopped as the room opened up in front of them, and Tali muttered a string of colorful curses followed by something that sounded an awful lot like "Keelah". Dread settled over Shepard's shoulders and the hairs began to rise on the back of her neck.

"Shepard, we've seen these before," Garrus murmured, uneasiness plain in his posture, "The geth used them on Eden Prime. Dragonsteeth…"

Tali stepped closer to Shepard's side, and instinctively Shepard took her hand. "The geth impaled colonists on them to turn them into husks," she remembered, slowly taking in the room. But this was different… It was wrong, somehow… It felt wrong. This wasn't the same as on Eden Prime. These spikes weren't to make troops to attack a target. So why? She turned slowly, examining the room, and then studying the dragonsteeth anew. "Look at the way the room is arranged," she finally said, gesturing with her free hand toward the spikes, "They treated this… thing like an altar."

Garrus didn't like the sound of that. That meant that these weren't just mindless hunks of meat and wires… There was still conscious thought happening, decisions being made… "It sure looks like that, but… why? Why would they want this to happen?"

Tali inched closer to Shepard's side, but she said nothing, still staring at the putrefying corpses of the science team. No one would have wanted this to happen. No one in their right mind. That's just it, then, she thought sourly, they weren't. "You heard the logs," she finally murmured, turning away and starting back across the floor. Tali's hand fell limply from her own, and Shepard stepped to one side to scoop a thermal clip from the floor. Where it came from, she had no clue, but she wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. "They were seeing things, hearing things… They were indoctrinated." The word tasted like rot on her tongue, but she ignored it, swallowing thickly as her friends stared after her. When Tali wavered, looking like she might collapse, Garrus hooked an arm around her waist and lead her after Shepard. "We can't do anything for them now, but we can stop these damn machines from using their corpses." That was the least they could do. Tucked back against the wall, there was an airlock that she hadn't seen when they'd first arrived, and Shepard raised her hand to open it. Defiantly, the lock blinked orange back at her in warning, and remained stubbornly closed, making her brow crease. Who was locking all of these doors? They hadn't found anyone alive—not yet, anyway—so who had the presence of mind to seal the Reaper behind them? For a moment, a finger of doubt crept in and Shepard wondered if maybe the Reaper was doing it, protecting itself… Damning them.

"I can open it, Shepard," Tali said as Garrus helped her over, giving his arm a grateful pat before pushing away to approach the door. There was a slight tremble to her hands, and her steps were cautious and measured, but she was upright, and aware. Shepard made a mental note to have Chakwas keep her for observations—not doubt she would need heavy antibiotics when they returned—but voiced no such intention. It could wait until they were safe aboard the Normandy. For now, their priority was their mission.

"Do it."

Tali's omnitool sparked violently as she worked—or perhaps it was the lock—and Shepard stepped back instinctively as the metal groaned in protest. The quarian muttered some muffled curses and Shepard glanced dubiously at Garrus; the turian merely shrugged. The door was painted with the Cerberus emblem, yet there were none of the Cerberus team left to have locked it. Whatever was resisting Tali's bypass wasn't happy to be disturbed.

Yet finally the doors jerked open, creaking and scraping as they opened to a crisp sterilization room. None of the small squad stepped forward, though, and Shepard frowned. If the Reaper was active—and she had enough sense to warrant that it might be—there was nothing keeping it from overriding protocol and frying them while they were inside.

"I don't like it," Garrus finally grumbled, grip tightening on his rifle.

My thoughts exactly. But Shepard kept the thought to herself and squared her shoulders. "We don't exactly have a choice," she muttered back, unhooking her pistol from her hip and checking the thermal clip. "Tali, stay here, and monitor the systems. When we're sure it's clear, I want you to follow us through. Garrus, you'll keep an eye on it while she's coming through. If we're very, very lucky, it'll be for nothing." At least, that's what she hoped. If not… She pushed that thought from her mind and started forward, not waiting to see if Garrus would follow. He did, glancing back as the doors snapped shut, cutting Tali off from them and a hiss of steam started from somewhere in the ceiling above them.

"Please stand by. Equalizing interior pressure with exterior conditions," a synthetic voice intoned mildly, but Shepard didn't want to stand by. She wanted to wrench the doors open and get out. The enclosed, pristine space was too similar to the Cerberus lab she'd woken up in. What if Cerberus already tried to indoctrinate me? The thought made her blood freeze and she had to reach out and grab the wall to ensure the floor hadn't dropped out from under her. What if… Could she ever know? Were her thoughts even her own?

"Shepard?" Garrus glanced nervously at the door before turning to face her completely and laid a hand on her arm. She didn't move, didn't react, and that scared him more than if she'd been frightened. Instead, she stared straight ahead, lips pressed into a thin line. "Jane, talk to me. What are you thinking?"

Shepard blinked and took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second before exhaling slowly. "I have a lot of questions," she finally whispered to her feet, "but no answers. And Cerberus isn't forthcoming." She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and sighed. "What should I do?" She had never asked anyone that question. Always, she was in control, thinking one step ahead, yet now… Now she couldn't even trust her own mind. It could be Cerberus in her ear, or the Reaper making her check over her shoulder. How could she think one step ahead of her own brain?

Garrus trilled a wordless reassurance and let his arm slide around her waist, giving her an encouraging squeeze. "Whatever it takes." When she didn't reply, he tried again. "You can do this, Shepard, I know you can. Just… Imagine it's Eden Prime." She'd fought dozens of husks—and geth—on Eden Prime and come out the victor. Right?

She let out breathy laugh and looked up at him with a sad smile. "I lost two people on Eden Prime," she finally said quietly.

He grimaced and looked away, mandibles snapping tight to his cheeks. The only way he could have said something worse was if he'd said Virmire. "Ok, so… not like Eden Prime." Shepard laughed again, yet now with the fine timbre of sincerity, and shot him a grateful glance and a small, appreciative nod; he couldn't help the instinctive, inquiring twitch of his browplates before he gave her a nod in return.

There was something absurdly comforting to her about his awkward reassurances, that he was so willing to try anything to assuage her worries; and somehow that seemed to work just fine. He was something familiar, that she could always rely on. Yet before she could reply, the pipes above them gave a threatening rattle and her thoughts came crashing back to the present; the Reaper seemed all the more threatening with Eden Prime fresh in her brain.

I could get them killed.

An icy barb of terror snagged in her chest, and she had to stifle an instinct to shudder. No. Focus, she scolded herself, Get out, get Tali through, and find this damn IFF. One step at a time. As the whooshing of air finally came to a stop, she stepped away from the wall as the doors slid open. The two all but bolted out of the airlock and Shepard pressed a finger to the comm in her ear. "We're through, Tali."

"Roger, Shepard. Heading in now."

The doors snapped closed and Shepard watched them as Garrus opened the diagnostic on his omnitool. For a second, neither spoke until Shepard sighed. "Will things ever be as simple as they used to be?"

Would they? Garrus's mandibles clacked nervously against his teeth, but he didn't answer. Not right away… Could they? Did he want them to? That thought gave him pause and he had to work to keep his expression neutral. If things were simple, what happened to them? Or is that it? Does she not want to deal with that? With me?

In his silence, Shepard arched a brow. "Garrus?"

"Wouldn't that be nice?" he forced out thickly. The doors slid open and Tali stepped through cautiously.

"All clear?" she asked and Shepard gave her a half-smile.

"For now," the commander replied, "But—"

"Remember, safety is everyone's concern," the synthetic voice interrupted blankly, "We have gone—" The recording snapped to static and for a second it seemed as if it would remain mute. "F-f-f-five days without a workplace death."

Well that was chilling… Shepard shook her head and regripped her pistol. "Come on," she finally said, waving them forward, "we've still got a mission." She advanced first, gun raised, and her team followed dutifully, their own guns at the ready. The catwalks were eerily empty and the stillness made Shepard's skin crawl. So why did she feel as if she was being watched? Not just watched… Her stomach turned over nervously as she struggled to place the queer sensation, stopping short and waving her friends ahead. It was oddly familiar, and yet… She didn't know it, not right away… The Citadel, maybe… What…

A shot fired and she started, instinctively shoving Tali toward the edge of the catwalk and the safe protection of cover. Another rang out and she looked across the open walkway as Garrus leaned back against the stack of storage crates he'd ducked behind. Her gaze swung back toward the direction they'd come and confusion stole across her face. Where had those husks come from? She stood slowly and took a step toward them, leaning far enough to see that they had been felled by two headshots, just as the others had. The sniper… She turned back the way they'd been heading, brow furrowed as Garrus moved to stand beside her, and nearly choked on her tongue. A single geth unit stood on one of the many pipes running along the ceiling, a rifle in its hand as it stared down at them. Wait, was that—

"Shepard-Commander."

Tali squeaked in surprise and Garrus let out a warble of shock, but Shepard could say nothing, nor make any sound as she and the geth stared at each other. And as quickly as it had appeared, the synthetic turned and disappeared, leaving them alone again. It was Tali who moved first, staggering to her feet and leaning heavily on her cover to break the spell of immobility.

"The geth… it… it was the sniper," she babbled, pointing to where it had been, "It… spoke! Geth don't… They haven't… It spoke!" She turned, and even through her helmet, Shepard could see her eyes were wide and feverish. "It knew who you were."

That alarmed Shepard more than the fact that it had spoken, if she was being honest. Did the geth perceive her as enough of a threat to identify, independent of her species? If it had just threatened them, or even remained silent, she would have written it off as nothing. But a geth that knew her… That wears your armor.She swallowed thickly to stifle that thought. "I'm more interested in why it would help us…" That was a lie. But it wouldn't do to say so. Instead, she started forward, gun gripped tightly in her hands. "Let's keep moving, we—"

"Shepard!"

Instinctively, she dropped to one knee and threw out a pulse of biotics. The husk she hadn't seen shrieked and stumbled until a high caliber bullet sent it tumbling off the edge of the catwalk. Without warning, more began clawing their way onto the walkway from below—how they got there, she didn't have time to consider—and Shepard lurched back to her feet. "Thanks."

She didn't how long they stood there, firing bullet after bullet into a nearly endless parade of moaning, groaning mechanical nasties; it felt like hours, but it could only have been seconds, minutes at most. Bits of grey, decaying flesh and fragments of shattered machinery littered the platform ahead of them, smears of black and eerily-fluorescent blue painting a grisly masterpiece over the smooth metal panels. Shepard shakily lowered her gun—only a few inches—and took a heavy gulp of air in the stillness before holding a hand down to Tali.

"I don't want to wait for more of them," she murmured as she helped the quarian to her feet. "How are you holding up?"

The quarian was clearly shaky, favoring her patched leg and Garrus could see the read-out on his visor blinking a warning. Her blood pressure was dropping, and her fever had risen. They needed to finish up and get back to the ship, or she was going to be in danger. "Shepard…"

The commander threw him a stern, knowing look and nodded toward the catwalks ahead of them. "Tali, I want you to stay back with Garrus: you are not to leave his side, is that clear?"

"Crystal, Shepard," Tali breathed, making no effort to argue; her shotgun was lax in her hands, and every line of her stance betrayed her growing fatigue. Shepard gave her arm a squeeze before starting down the next ramp. Garrus stayed close to Tali, trying to keep one eye on her and one on Shepard, yards ahead of them.

Always the damn hero… He couldn't even fault her for it now. No matter what—even in the belly of a Reaper—Shepard was going to try to keep her people safe. And I'm going to keep her safe. Their mission was to find the IFF, but his was to bring her back safe.

Shepard was nearly to the next ramp up when a heavy, gasping wheeze made her freeze midstride, knuckles going white around her pistol as heavy, plodding footfalls echoed in the empty space. She could hear Garrus push Tali to cover behind her, but didn't turn, pointing her weapon at the top of the ramp ahead of her, and waited. Precious seconds ticked by, but she didn't move, eyes locked on the narrow gap that whatever was coming after them next would have to go through.

An inhuman, almost mechanical shriek cut through the air an instant before the scion lumbered onto the ramp and Shepard swore in every language she could remember and emptied her clip into the stumbling monstrosity. It roared at her, swinging with one arm for her as she took a few steps back, swapping the clip in her pistol. Thick, blue ooze leaked from the bulletholes she'd left, yet the creature didn't seem to slow, lifting the mutated, deformed firearm that replaced its other hand.

"Shepard, get back here!"

But she couldn't move, staring into the monster's face as it lurched forward another step. Shoot it, you idiot, her brain screamed, Run, do something! But if she ran, it would follow, and it would be on them. Tali wasn't in any state to be running and dodging the hulking monster… But you are. She threw a haphazard biotic missile and leapt to the side as the scion fired. Violent, shuddering impacts cascaded down the walkway; one caught Shepard's leg, knocking it out from under her and sending her crashing to the floor, but the rest broke harmlessly over her squad's cover.

Garrus peaked back over the patch of cover he hand pushed Tali into and felt his throat tighten. Shepard scrambled on hands and knees as fast she could, reaching for her pistol just out of reach, and the scion's head swiveled, its attention locked on her. She was a closer target, and on the run. Prey.

"Tali, tell me you have something," he murmured, sighting down his rifle.

Her drone flickered to life yards ahead of them, letting out a tinny screech as it rocketed towards the scion with sparks flying and he had his answer. Without waiting, he fired as fast as he could, sending bullet after high-caliber bullet into the fleshy sacs of the monster's shoulders. Come on, you bastard, come back this way…

It didn't.

Shepard grabbed hold of her gun and rolled onto her back, unloading the clip as fast as she could. One shot—a lucky shot, she knew—caught it in the eye and it shrieked, flailing blindly before swinging its arm to slam the heavy limb on top of her. She rolled, and suddenly the walkway was gone, open air yawning up to meet her. Panic hit her and she reached blindly, pistol falling past her, forgotten, as she scrambled to get a handhold on something, anything.

Her palm made hard contact with part of the catwalk railing and she grabbed it, feeling her heart pounding in her skull as she dangled helplessly. The metal rod quivered in her grip and she knew the scion was getting closer. Not now… Not now… For a second, she could only close her eyes, praying to gods she didn't believe in that she'd get another miracle.

"Shepard!"

Tali was screaming, and there was a steady staccato of rifle fire that almost kept time with her heart. Her arms started to shake, and she could feel her shoulders screaming in protest. She could hear another of the scion's cascading blasts, along with the sharp snap of electricity. Tali's drone. The creature's footfalls seemed to move away and Shepard took a chance, straining to pull herself back over the edge. The top half of her torso made it back over, and for an instant she almost thought she had managed to escape. Until she heard the telltale roar and looked up to see the scion turn back toward her. Son of a—

Its swing made her drop back off the edge, narrowly avoiding the blow, but one of her hands slipped. The grip she had with one hand strained, and the sudden drop jarred her shoulder hard enough that she could feel the joint rip out of its socket. Her vision went white and she had to remind herself to breathe.

Garrus didn't know when he reloaded—he was sure he had, because he hadn't stopped firing since he'd lost sight of Shepard—but it seemed to pass in a blur. He was dimly aware of Tali screaming the commander's name, and of her leaning against his shoulder as she launched one technical assault after another at the hulking monster mere feet from where he prayed Shepard was. She can't be gone.

A sniper round took the scion in the leg, dropping it to one knee, and another snapped its head back. It fell forward slowly, laboriously crashing onto the catwalk, directly where Shepard had stood, waiting for it.

Shepard.

Garrus was running down the ramp before he had even put up his gun, sliding to his knees at the edge of the platform. "Shepard!" Shepard looked up slowly, her expression drawn and pale, and he held a hand down to her. Even under the thick plates of her armor, he knew her shoulder wasn't supposed to look like that… She grabbed his hand he pulled with all his strength.

She was light, he'd forgotten that, and it was easy to get her back on the walkway. But when he released her, she didn't get to her feet right away. Instead, she ripped the guard off her shoulder and shot him a look that nearly floored him: she was scared.

"Garrus…" she panted, "I need you… to do something for me… You're not gonna like it…"

Without the armor hiding it, he could see the way her arm hung wasn't natural. He glanced over his shoulder as Tali started cautiously inching down the ramp, then looked back down at the woman in front of him. She wasn't his CO just then, but his friend. His closest friend. "What do you need?"

"My… shoulder. I need… You're going to have to… put it back in." She turned enough so her dislocated shoulder was closest to him, teeth clenched tightly behind pursed lips. "Just… Lift my arm, and push it back in… Hard. It's… going to hurt."

Garrus felt his mandibles snap tight to his face, but nodded. Carefully, he lifted her arm, and even though he was trying to be gentle, he could still see her wince. "Sorry," he mumbled, adjusting his grip and putting his other hand on her opposite shoulder. "Ready?"

She nodded, face ashen, and he let out a long breath. One quick motion and he felt the joint pop back in. Shepard yelled, slamming her fist onto the floor once before taking a long, slow breath in.

"Thanks," she finally forced out, gingerly picking up the piece of armor.

He could see the cold sweat on her brow, and where her hair stuck to the back of her neck; this wasn't how the mission was supposed to go. Without thinking, he cradled her cheek in his hand, making her look up in surprise, but a tiny, grateful smile showed at the corners of her mouth. "I'd prefer a little less excitement," he finally mumbled, aiming for levity.

Shepard laughed without thinking and gave a small shake of her head. "I think you're in the wrong line of work, then," she replied tiredly, climbing to her feet a bit slower than normal. She winced when her ankle throbbed—damn scion—but carefully reattached her shoulder guard.

Garrus snorted, standing as well as Tali reached them. "Someone has to keep an eye on you." After a second, his brow furrowed. "What happened to—"

"Gone," she answered, knowing full well he was going to ask about her gun. "Fell when I did."

"Shepard, are you—"

"I'm fine, Tali, just… sore. I'll live." She gave the young quarian a reassuring smile and looked back down the walkway. "How much further?"

Tali cast Garrus a dubious glance, but answered, "Not very. The IFF is in an airlock nearby, and the core just beyond."

Shepard nodded, and Garrus could see the tension all the way from her jaw down to her clenched fists. "Good. I've had enough of this damn thing," she finally muttered, rolling her shoulder experimentally. There was a dull ache, but nothing crippling, and she'd have to make do.

"We should stick together," Garrus finally suggested, looking between the two women, "If anything attacks us between here and the IFF, we'll be better off together."

Tali nodded her agreement, but Shepard just looked at him for a second, an unreadable expression on her face.

We should stick together.

We'll be better off together.

Together…

Stop it, she scolded herself, Not now. She swallowed and nodded. "I agree. Tali, I need your pistol." The quarian handed the sidearm over obediently and Shepard snapped the safety off. "Right, let's get this IFF and get out of here."

Their progress along the catwalk was slow, Shepard supporting Tali with one arm, pistol in the other. Garrus advanced a few steps ahead of them, sniper rifle folded on the back of his shoulder, and assault rifle nestled firmly in the crook of his arm. Seconds turned into minutes as they crept along the now eerily silent platform, and Shepard felt a twinge of pain when Tali leaned on her more heavily. The quarian's gun was lax in her grip, not even high enough to blow out an enemy's knees. Shepard pursed her lips and adjusted the young girl's arm over her shoulder, forcing herself to keep her own weapon up.

"Stay with me, Tali," she murmured, giving her a light shake, "We're almost there…"

They needed to hurry. Garrus risked a quick glance over his shoulder, but a flurry of motion made him stop. Shepard pulled up short as well, tightening her grip on her still-raised gun as they waited. Garrus turned slowly, studying every inch of the catwalks ahead of them: a few crates, some volatile looking containers, a short flight of stairs… What had he seen? It was… something, he knew that. Just a flicker, almost a shadow just out of sight… But it was there.

Is it?

He could feel his hands go clammy inside his gloves and forced himself to swallow. Just keep moving, he told himself, trying desperately to push that thought away, it's just through there. He forced his feet to move again, but felt a hand on his shoulder before he could take a step.

"Garrus?"

Shepard. He let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding and looked down at where she stood beside him. Even with Shepard's support, Tali was wilting, her breath coming in heavy pants that fogged her helmet, and Shepard still looked pale, her expression tight.

"I'm fine, just… ready to get off this thing."

Shepard nodded. "I couldn't agree more." She gave Tali another light shake and the quarian lifted her head. "Put your gun up, Tali, and lean on me. We're almost there."

Tali nodded slowly, snapping her shotgun to her back again. "I can… hack the door," she mumbled, pointing, "Just… get me to it."

A shadow, just out of sight, made Garrus turn sharply, finger hovering a hair's breadth over the trigger. Again, there was nothing and he forced himself to look back toward the airlock door, just a few dozen yards ahead of them. "Then let's go."

Shepard watched him start off ahead of them and frowned, but said nothing. They were all on edge, she knew, it was just nerves. The sooner they got back to the Normandy the better. She shuffled forward, towing Tali with her in the direction of Garrus's retreating back.

As soon as his boot touched the first stair, the scratching started, and all three tensed. The horrible, metal-on-metal scraping grew steadily louder, and Shepard turned slowly, searching for the source of the sound.

It's coming from everywhere…

"Shepard, get to cover!"

What?

There was only a second of silence before the first wave of husks scrambled over the edges of the catwalk, flailing as they ran toward the small squad. Shepard's eyes went wide but she couldn't move, gun shaking in her grip. The first two fell to rifle fire, and a third to a shock from Tali's omnitool.

Fire, you idiot! Shoot them! her brain screamed, and the spell was broken. She unloaded the clip of her borrowed pistol—the trigger was too tight and it took far longer than it should have—into the snarling, grotesque, mutilated faces of the science team. These still resembled the men and women they had once been, whole sections of their faces still intact, still human and staring.

One slammed into her side and she fell, off-balance. She could hear Tali screaming, but it sounded miles away as she struggled to keep the husk off of her, to keep its gnashing, yellowed teeth away from her face. It had been a woman, before the Reaper had started to change her, and what remained of her hair blocked Shepard's vision. She drove her fist into the decaying stump of the partially-turned husk's nose as hard and as quickly as she could. Over and over, she punched her assailant until there was a fist-sized dent in the thing's skull. She threw the limp body off with a cry of disgust and rolled onto her knees. Tali was leaning on a stack of crates, firing her shotgun from her hip, with Garrus beside her.

How had they gotten so far away?

Something struck her back and Shepard fell forward again, air rushing out of her lungs.

"Shepard!"

She looked up to see Tali staggering toward her, but shook her head. With a roar, she rolled, and threw her head back hard. Pain blossomed where her skull made contact with metal, but whatever had tackled her didn't try again. She lurched to her feet and waved them away. "Both of you, go!" She snatched Tali's pistol off the ground and started firing again, turning to face the husks that had started coming up from under the walkway behind them. "Get that door open!"

Garrus growled something, but took Tali's arm over his shoulder. They didn't have time to be arguing. "Come on!"

Shepard watched them back down the stairs from the corner of her eye, keeping her gun trained on the growing group of Cerberus husks. One lunged for her, his uniform almost unchanged—though his skin had all but melted off—and Shepard fired. The point-blank shot took off half of its shoulder, and its gait faltered. A second between the eyes made it collapse and Shepard began her own slow retreat toward the airlock. Three more shambled ahead, wheezing and groaning at her as she backed away. Again something slammed into her back and she let out a string of curses. Someday, they would figure out how husks had gotten so agile. She threw back her elbow, catching her assailant in the jaw. She got to one knee and another two bore her to the ground. Something yanked her hair, and she could feel one of them try to bite through the Kevlar of her gauntlet. She let a tendril of biotic energy creep through her body until a metal-clawed hand raked down the side of her face.

Oh, fuck this.

She threw all of her energy outward in a savage yell, the sheer force of it lifting her off the ground. Husks flew across the catwalk, slamming into the crates and railings, or simply sliding off the edge to fall into nothingness. One struck the crates of compressed gas and they burst into an explosion of flames.

Tali was focused exclusively on the lock in front of her, but Garrus couldn't look away as more and more husks had converged on Shepard. He'd fired a few rounds, trying to keep more of them away, but then… A flash of blue, and then bang! Fire… Smoke… He could only stare at the thick, almost black cloud that shrouded the platform in darkness. Shepard…

"I'm through!" Tali turned, intent on telling Shepard, but froze. "Where—"

A hacking cough cut her off, and Shepard stumbled out of the smoke, covering her mouth as another bout of coughs made her double over, hands planted on her knees. Blood ran red from three parallel scratches on her face, from temple to jaw and Garrus instinctively lifted her chin to get a better look.

"I'm fine," she panted, taking gulps of the clean air, "I'm fine. Just open it up."

Garrus frowned, digging a packet of medigel out of his armor as Tali lifted her omnitool to force the lock open. Shepard gave him a dark look when he held up the packet, but he huffed out an exasperated breath at her and she rolled her eyes, obediently turning her head so he could see the scratches again.

"You don't have to do that…"

"Yes I do." They weren't deep, but they sure did bleed a lot… He spread a dab across her cheek, then up toward the tops of the scratches. "Didn't we just decide this wasn't going to happen again?" he murmured, just loud enough for her to hear. Shepard snorted lightly and he frowned, dabbing more of the clear gel along her jaw. "I'm serious."

"So am I," she whispered back, "We have a mission. I appreciate your concern, Garrus, but that doesn't change the fact that we have a dangerous mission."

She was right, he knew she was right, but there was still a small part of his brain that hissed, It should. He pushed it away, wiping the last of the medigel from his gloves. "Yeah, well, I doubt Tali and I would get The Illusive Man's blessing to take over the mission if you died on this thing, so please, just…" He couldn't think how to finish that sentence, and Tali saved him the trouble.

"We're in."

Shepard nodded and slipped past him, shooting him a pointed look as she looped Tali's arm over her shoulders again. Garrus had no choice but to follow as they hobbled forward, sullenly swapping the clip of his gun.

"That's it," Tali murmured, pointing to a bit of unremarkable circuitry sitting on a console. Shepard scooped it up without hesitation and nodded toward the airlock's exit.

"Can you get it open?"

"Who… do you think you're… talking to?" Tali murmured as Shepard helped her to the door.

Shepard just smiled and shook her head as the quarian began working again. She could feel Garrus behind her and tilted her head back to meet his sullen look.

"We don't know what's waiting for us on the other side of these doors, and that geth sniper is still out there," she finally said, taking the chance to reload her pistol, "so we need to blow that mass effect core, and the faster the better."

He could see the deep lines of tension and fatigue around her mouth and across her brow—she looked older than he'd ever seen her—and he finally nodded. "You got it, Shepard."

A small, relieved smile crossed her face, but as soon as it was there, it was gone as soon as the doors slid open. Yet in its stead, a barrier blocked their way; Shepard walked right up to it, peering through as…

Husks staggered down the walkway that stretched ahead of them, a console at the end, at the foot of the mass effect core, bathing the room in a blue glow. It took Shepard a few moments to realize that it wasn't another husk at the console, but something else. Her eyes narrowed as she watched.

"It's… interfacing directly with… the Reaper," Tali murmured, and Shepard frowned.

The geth. What was it—

It turned sharply, firing two shots that felled the husks closest to it. More were advancing, but the geth turned back to the console, its hands moving slowly over the console. Suddenly, the barrier fell and Shepard took a step forward. The geth made as if to flee, but ran right into another throng of husks; it went down with a "thunk" and Shepard fired a few of her own shots into the mob of husks.

"Garrus."

"On it."

She could hear him open fire on the core above their heads and she started forward, all but carrying Tali with her toward the geth's lifeless platform. More husks began crawling up from under the walkway and Shepard grit her teeth.

"Tali, stay with that thing," Shepard murmured as the quarian leaned against the console, "And don't you dare pass out on me."

"Only… 'cause you… asked… so nicely."

Shepard let out a short bark of laughter and turned back toward the growing mass of husks advancing toward their position. She opened fire, hitting any target she could—head, chest, leg, anything—and switching to biotics when she had to reload. And then her thermal clips were gone, leaving her without a gun and with a veritable parade of growling synthetics threatening to overtake them. And Garrus… Oh, dammit, why wasn't he moving?! She risked a glance down at Tali before taking off down the platform to tackle a husk that was about to leap onto his back. The husk shrieked on her, flecks of motor lubricant spraying from its mouth as she threw it off the side of the catwalk and spun, slamming the side of her fist into the skull of another as it came up behind her. It was strange, to be thankful that the husks were coming after her, but as they turned and staggered after her, she was. They weren't trying to get past her, to target Tali, or even Garrus. It was as if they knew… Something grabbed her ankle and she swore, stomping hard on the grey-tinted wrist; the husk's grip relaxed almost immediately and she drove her boot into its skull as soon as its head appeared over the edge of the platform. How many people had been on this science team, anyway?!

There was a sudden pop, like glass cracking, and then a roar like a nuclear explosion and glass rained down on the two women. The whole Reaper began to shake and Shepard looked back toward the empty frame where the core had once sat. Now for the fun part…

"Shepard… the geth… acting… strange. We should…. bring it with… us."

The human commander frowned and lifted Tali from where she had sunk to her knees on the ground and pushed her toward Garrus as he approached. "Think that's your fever talking, Tali, but I agree."

Garrus frowned as he put an arm around the quarian and started toward the exit. "Leave it, we have enough trouble."

But Shepard shook her head. "No one's ever captured a geth intact. We're taking it." Without waiting, she threw the inactive robot over her shoulder, bracing her knees against the dead weight. She had expected it to be heavy, but goddamn… When she looked back up, Garrus looked like there was something else he wanted to say, something itching to get out, but it never came. Instead, he waved a dismissive hand and turned away.

What the hell was she thinking? Didn't they have enough to worry about? Both she and Tali were injured; there were most likely dozens of husks waiting outside these doors for them, and they had minutes to get off this ship before they all burned up in Mnemosyne's atmosphere and that was not how he wanted to go out. It would take a Spirits-damned miracle for them to make it off this wreck in time. But he couldn't tell her that. He couldn't tell her any of that because she seemed to have stopped listening to him at all. All of his advice had fallen on deaf ears and he was stuck just watching as she, once again, put herself at risk—a completely unnecessary and stupid risk—just to finish the mission. Damn this mission. He was tired of this Reaper, he was tired of the mission, and tired of trying to talk to Jane when it was Commander Shepard who answered him. He turned away from her, waving his hand in her direction, before saying, "You know the risk, that's all I'm going to say." He couldn't even bring himself to care if she answered.

Shepard's brow lowered, but she stalked after him, forcing herself not to favor her throbbing ankle. "This isn't a debate," she growled as she caught up with them and the three of them broke into a jog. He didn't even respond. There was no concerned comment, not even a snide remark about her risking her life for a piece of quarian technology. Not a single word. Just a brief sideways glance before he shifted his arm around Tali and continued to run through the cavernous Reaper.

She huffed a breath and pressed on. They could figure this out – whatever this was – once they were off the damned ship. That didn't stop her mind from coming up with every possible way this might turn out. None of them were good.

Maybe you've ruined this friendship. It hasn't been the same since and you both know it. What made you think that was a good idea when you aren't even sure you're completely yourself. You aren't even all there; why did you think it was good idea to go trying to replace what Cerberus lost?

She shook her head, trying to get rid of that line of thinking, but it only made her shoulder twinge. Yet the throb of pain was at least enough to pump a bit more adrenaline through her blood.

The sprint through the last few tubes felt like an eternity, but when she saw the Normandy floating outside the airlock through her helmet, Shepard had let a relieved smile break across her face. "Let's go people! Joker, open the portside airlock!"

And sure enough, the airlock slid open. With a grunt, she threw the geth across the gap, and held a hand out for Tali. The young quarian was barely standing, and Shepard gave her hand a squeeze before shoving her toward the open door.

So they stood there, side by side on the edge of nothing as the Normandy waited and Shepard turned toward her turian friend. "Garrus, go."

"Like hell I am. Get your ass on the ship, Shepard."

She could only stare for a second before her fists clenched instinctively. "I'm in command here, Garrus," she warned quietly.

"And I'm tired of watching you play quasar with death, now get on the damn ship."

"Hey! If you two are quite finished, we gotta get out of here!"

Joker's voice snapped her out of it and Shepard turned away. "Got it Joker, on our way." And without looking back, she leapt across the gap. Anger and adrenaline made it feel as if she were frozen, floating just out of reach of her ship, yet all of a sudden, the feeling was gone and her feet slammed onto the airlock floor. And just seconds later, a second set of boots landed beside her. She still didn't look. "We're clear, go!" The doors snapped closed immediately and she felt the pull of the Normandy's jump to lightspeed. The interior doors whooshed open and she stormed out, ripping her helmet off without waiting to see if her squad followed.

"Shepard—"

"Officer Vakarian, until further notice, you are relieved of duty." The words tasted bitter on her tongue, but she forced them out anyway. He wasn't going to stand there and undermine her on a mission, not now. Nothing has changed. I am still in command. "You will be notified when we have further need of your services." Let me handle it. Let me handle it like I handled Saren.

Don't make me change.

Shepard violently shoved the thought away as she reached the elevator and smacked the button for her quarters, but it wouldn't be ignored. She had handled Saren by being alone. She had stayed sane by keeping a firm hand on the reins. And she knew no other way of completing their mission. It was life or death, again. Another suicide mission…

And as long as I handle it the same way, we'll all make it out again.

Garrus had frozen midstride, halfway between the airlock and the galaxy map as the elevator snapped closed, leaving him in the stunned silence of the CIC.

"Um… what the hell was that?"

Tali snorted from where she was sitting on the floor of the airlock. "Lover's… quarrel, Joker… They'll work… it out."

Garrus couldn't make himself move. It felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room, and his feet felt bolted to the floor. Relieved of… What was she trying to do? Was she that angry?

"Ms. Zorah, do you need assistance?" EDI's placid voice cut in and he forced himself to turn around.

"I'll take care of it, EDI," he finally forced out, lifting Tali to her feet again and helping her limp toward the elevator. "Tell Dr. Chakwas we're on our way."