A Longing Feeling
By the end of the week, most of the crew of Voyager had gotten word about the new development in Seven's pregnancy. She was on her way back to her quarters when B'Elanna stopped her.
"How are you feeling, Seven?"
"Annoyed."
"Oh? How come?"
"I am tired of everyone inquiring about how I feel."
"We're just worried about you."
"Then perhaps you should find a different way to express your concern." They passed several of Chakotay's students in the corridor on their way to classes. A few gave Seven a small wave or nod of the head in greeting.
"I don't blame you. When I was pregnant with Miral, I had people asking me the same thing every day. I guess I should have realized how it made me feel."
"How is Miral?"
"She's getting big. She's almost five months old now. I can't believe time has gone by so fast." Seven just nodded.
"Tom has convinced me to let him take her on one of the holodecks. I don't know what I was thinking when I agreed."
"Perhaps he wishes to share an interest with the child."
"You're probably right." They had reached Seven and Chakotay's quarters. Without breaking their conversation, the two women entered and took seats on the couch.
"So how are you and Chakotay handling married life?"
"It is a new experience. At times it can be frustrating. It is hard to find time to be alone." She looked around the room, as if assessing it.
"However, I am grateful for Chakotay's support and kindness."
"I have to admit, I was surprised to hear him propose. But it wasn't hard to tell that he was in love with you."
"You believed the transition came too quickly."
"Sort of…but then again, not everyone needs three years to realize they want to be together."
"I was uncertain at first as well. But, he can be a stubborn individual."
"So can you." Seven cracked a half smile.
"So I have been told." B'Elanna just patted Seven on the shoulder and leaned back against the couch.
"So are you nervous?" She paused for a moment and clarified. "About having two, I mean."
"The thought is unsettling. We do not have the space here for one child."
"I know what you mean. They take up more room than you'd expect. If you need anything just let me know."
"Thank you. I will keep your offer in mind."
"Have you and Chakotay thought about names yet?"
"They will not be fully developed for eight months. Why would we choose names now?"
"Well it's sort of a big part of having a child."
"You found the experience to be frustrating and unnecessary." B'Elanna nodded in agreement.
"Well…it was just that everyone was suggesting names and it was overwhelming. But I don't think that will be the case. That would be too inefficient."
"You are correct."
"Well I should get going. Tom should be back soon and I'm sure the baby will be hungry."
"Thank you for your company."
"Anytime."
Seven watched B'Elanna leave the room and let out a long breath. All of these experiences were beginning to make her miss her parents. They would never see her children. They would never know who she had become. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn't hear Chakotay walk in. He sunk onto the couch next to her and slid his arm around her shoulders. She looked at him and leaned against him.
"What's on your mind?"
"I believe I am feeling…regret."
"What do you mean?"
"My parents will never know of the existence of my…our children. They will never know what I have become."
"I think they would be proud and happy for you."
"It is speculation. It is irrelevant."
"I know…but it's normal to miss your parents."
"Perhaps." He reached a hand up to stroke her hair. They sat on the couch lost in thought for several more minutes before she sat up.
"Where are you going?"
"To prepare dinner."
The evening passed by quickly and soon Seven found herself curled up beneath the sheets, wrapped gently in Chakotay's arms. She closed her eyes, willing her body to surrender to her unconscious. It took ten minutes of tossing and turning before she finally got comfortable.
In her subconscious found herself wandering the corridors back on Voyager. She looked down to see she was very pregnant. Seven walked on until she reached Sickbay. The doors slid open and she saw two people sitting on bio beds. They looked familiar and the Doctor beckoned to her.
"What is going on?"
"Hello sweetheart." Seven scrutinized the man in front of her. Where did she know him from? Then it registered in the back of her mind.
"Papa?" He nodded.
"I do not understand. How is this happening?"
"You severed their link to the Collective last week." Seven looked at the Doctor in confusion. How could she be here? It didn't make sense. They'd been on Earth when she had gotten pregnant.
"This is not real."
"Annika, darling. We're so happy to see you. We've missed you." Her mother reached out her arms, pulling Seven to her in a hug.
Seven sat up abruptly and looked around. Her hands immediately rested on her stomach. She heaved a sigh, grateful to find that she was still only in the first trimester. She began to lay back down when Chakotay woke up. Even in the semi-darkness of the room, he could see the startled and slightly frightened look on her face.
"What is it?"
"I…I was dreaming."
"Must have been some dream."
"I was on Voyager….I was pregnant….it appeared to be the final trimester. And…my parents were in Sickbay." She looked at him through the darkness.
"They were human."
"Human?"
"The Doctor told me I had severed them from the Collective." He let out a breath and wrapped his arms around her.
"It was just a dream. You were thinking about your parents before you fell asleep. Your subconscious probably acted on those thoughts."
"Perhaps you are right. But why would I encounter them aboard Voyager?"
"I don't know. We can analyze it in the morning if you'd like."
"That won't be necessary. As you said, it was just a dream."
"Try and go back to sleep." She took a slow breath and rested her head on the pillow. She would do her best to try and forget the dream. Her parents were Borg. They were in the Delta Quadrant. They would never know what she had made of her life, not even in dreams.