Horace: Sorry for taking this so long folks.
Pantsy: Yeah. We had some techinal difficulties from a certain alien from the planet Vegandon.
Kendall: That doesn't even exist.
?: Are you saying that Vegandon doesn't exist anymore?
The crowd turn around to see Dark Vegan who is very angry.
Dark Vegan: If you think that Vegandon doesn't exist, then Earth doesn't exist as well.
SariSpy56: Calm down Dark Vegan. Vegandon still exists.
Dark Vegan: Good. Oh yeah and sorry about those techincal difficulties earlier.
Horace: We forgive you.
Pantsy: Well that should do it just fine.
Horace: Now be prepared to watch our scary musical story on video!
Pantsy: We call this one 'There's No Business Like Bling-Bling Boy's Business'
Just then, Bling-Bling Boy crashes through the window.
Bling-Bling Boy: Finally. A story about how I won sweet Susan's heart.
Dark Vegan: Watch the video and find out Eugene.
Bling-Bling Boy: It's Bling-Bling Boy!
Dark Vegan: Whatever.
Helga: And we would like to thank Ashurea4, Equinox77, and Vemonsdragon14 for the reviews.
Pantsy: Enjoy the show folks!
There's No Business Like Bling-Bling Boy's Business
Start Video.
(In this video, Selena will mostly speak English rather that Japanese.)
The curtains of the opera rolls up to reveal a tavern called Bling-Bling Tavern and inside the tavern is Bling-Bling Boy watching sadly as his two customers Brad Buttowski and Selena kiss each other on their booth. Dukey the dog, Pantsy and Horace on the other hand were drinking their beers. Then the song plays.
Bling-Bling Boy: *Oh why can't no girl love a guy with this mug
Whose mother declared you're too ugly to hug?*
Just then, the picture of Bling-Bling Boy's mother came to life and spits him on the face. Bling-Bling Boy sadly wipes the spit out of his face and returns to the counter.
Dukey: How about pouring me some more beer Eugene?
Bling-Bling Boy: It's Bling-Bling Boy and how about try some of my new micro brew.
But when Bling-Bling Boy try to pour some beer, nothing happened.
Bling-Bling Boy: Must be another rat in a pipe. Let's see if this cobra solves the problem.
Bling-Bling Boy puts the cobra in the tap and trys again. Nothing happened.
Bling-Bling Boy: Nothing.
Bling-Bling sighed as he opens the door from the floor and gets to work while Selena had to go to the washroom leaving Brad alone for a while.
Bling-Bling Boy: *Just once I wish cupid would draw back his bow
And shoot me a cutie who standards are low*
As Bling-Bling Boy gets fixing, Brad noticed an unattended tap.
Brad: Alright an unattended tap!
Dukey: I wouldn't go there if I were you.
Brad: Whatever talking dog. It's like taking candy from a baby.
Dukey: Actually, I'm a teen with a rare hair disorder.
Brad: Whatever. Yeah Brad!
Bling-Bling Boy: *I'm unlucky in love
I'm unlucky in luck*
But what Bling-Bling Boy didn't know is that Brad wasn't looking where he was standing and accidentally falls onto the machine which caused the broken pipes to go through his body.
Brad: OW! I'm dying!
Bling-Bling Boy: Oh my god! Just try to relax.
Brad: But it hurts.
Bling-Bling Boy: Wait right here. I'll get some help.
When Bling-Bling Boy gets back up to the counter, he saw Selena walking out of the washroom.
Bling-Bling Boy: Selena. The most horrible thing had happened to Brad!
Selena: Well what is it?
Bling-Bling Boy: Um...
But he saw Selena smile.
Bling-Bling Boy (in a low voice): She's so beautiful, it makes my heart take flight!
Bling-Bling Boy suddenly went high up in the air as if he was flying.
Bling-Bling Boy: Look at me! I can fly!
But he accidentally hit the light which causes his head to go on fire but luckly for him, one of the crew members extingushes the fire before it can burn Bling-Bling Boy to death.
Bling-Bling Boy: Selena. Brad ran out on you saying that he doesn't love you anymore.
Selena: He what?
Both people could hear Brad's cry, but Bling-Bling Boy is able to hide it from Selena.
Bling-Bling Boy: Now let Dr. Bling-Bling cure you from your misery.
But what Bling-Bling Boy didn't notice is that a bit of Brad's blood had flown from the pipes to Selena's glass making the beer's color change from creamy white to pinkish red. Selena takes a sip of her glass and went silent for a moment.
Selena: There's something odd about this beer.
Bling-Bling Boy: *gasp*
Selena: *It tastes like cuddling
It tastes like clean clothes
It tastes like hot creamy coco mixed with rainbow.*
Bling-Bling Boy: It does?
Just then, Horace pops up and is holding the red beer and so did Pantsy. Dukey on the other hand makes his appearnce in a Phantom of the Opera style while playing the role of the Phantom.
Horace: *Full bodied*
Pantsy: *Full blooded*
Dukey: *It's such a lovely blend*
Pantsy, Horace and Dukey: *It's jolly, it's loyal, it's like drinking your best friend.*
Selena: *I stopped my crying, why I don't know.
But this cozy, bubbles in my nosey makes me want to have...more.*
The audience applaud as the curtains closed for an intermission. Among the audience were the DiPazzi twins Michael and Antonio.
Michael: This is the best musical we've ever watched in years.
Antonio: Yeah but don't tell Gordon about this. He hates musicals.
Michael: Okay.
But they were interupted by Dark Vegan.
Dark Vegan: Do you mind keep your voices down? I'm trying to enjoy this earthly musical.
Michael: No problem.
Dark Vegan: Thank you.
The curtains rolled up to reveal Selena and Bling-Bling Boy alone in the tavern.
Bling-Bling Boy: So. It's been a week since Brad ran out on you eh.
Selena: But I missed him a lot. I'm worried about him.
Bling-Bling Boy: Well here's the letter that Brad wrote for you before he left.
As Selena reads the letter, Brad makes his appearance (wearing a robe) and doing his musical.
Brad: *While dating other girls the other day,
A thought occurred to me.
I'd like to try most every girl
From here to "Timbuk-tee".
Oh, there's so many girls around the world
Of every shape and size.
I want to nibble on Jamaican babes
And teriyaki thighs.
I want to French-kiss a French girl
And spoon an English lady.
Cause frankly, dear
To not be queer
Just makes me want to puke.
So find yourself a man
Who'll want you in the sack.
I recommend our dear old friend...Eugene Hamilton!*
Brad suddenly disappear as Bling-Bling Boy corrects him.
Bling-Bling Boy (in a singing voice): It's Bling-Bling Boy and letters don't lie. (*in a normal voice*) So what do you say Selena. Wanna give Bling-Bling a throw?
Selena: I don't know.
Bling-Bling Boy: Maybe you need another drink of amnesia.
But when Bling-Bling Boy tries to give Selena the same beer that he had given to her last week, the secret ingredient (Brad's blood) didn't show up to turn the beer into pinkish red.
Bling-Bling Boy: I'll be right back.
When Bling-Bling Boys goes to where Brad is, Brad is missing.
Bling-Bling Boy: Darn it. Brad is late for this part. Gotta keep the audience entertained. So uh I tried to win Susan's heart again but her flame-headed brother Johnaton or as people call him Johnny stopped me yet again.
Bling-Bling Boy saw Brad on the broken machine indicating that he's ready for his part.
Bling-Bling Boy: Oh I see we're moving back to business eh.
Bling-Bling Boy walks to where Brad is and saw him looking pale as ever. Bling-Bling Boy smiles evilly.
Bling-Bling Boy: Once your girlfriend drinks the unusual beer made from your blood, she'll think that you cheated on her and she'll be mine forever! MWA HA HA HA HA HA!
As Brad's blood flows to the tap, someone's cellphone from the audience rang. It belongs to Ms. Chicarelli and the audience look angry and among them is the talking cat Mr. Mittens.
Ms. Chicarelli: I can't talk right now, I'm watching the play.
Mr. Mittens: Be quiet m'am. We're trying to enjoy the play!
Ms. Chicarelli: Hold on a sec.
Then Ms. Chicarelli furiously look at Mr. Mittens.
Ms. Chicarelli: Shut up fat cat! I'm on the phone.
Mr. Mittens: USHER!
Pantsy (as the theatre user) came.
Pantsy: You called your felineness?
Mr. Mittens: That crazy old woman is calling on her phone during the play!
Pantsy: I'll deal with her.
Pantsy snatches the phone out of Ms. Chicarelli's hand.
Pantsy: You're calling during the play m'am. No play for you!
Ms. Chicarelli: Fine. See if I care.
Then she stomps off. The play resumes with Bling-Bling Boy giving Selena the unusual beer. Suddenly, Selena's behavior changes.
Selena: Whoa. I've never knew that you're hot stuff Bling-Bling.
Bling-Bling Boy: So does that mean that you love me?
Selena (crying): Well I guess it's time for me to move on.
A tear from Selena's eye fell through the wooden floor and into Brad's forehead who wakes up and saw Bling-Bling Boy winning Selena's heart while performing a musical. Brad get angry and starts trying to get himself free.
Bling-Bling Boy: But I have to tell ya something first.
*My taste for romance
Is kinda perverse.
I can only make love
In the back of a hearse.
Plus I gotta be dressed
As a Civil War nurse.
And then when I'm finished,
I'll go through your purse.
But you could do worse.*
Selena: *I could do worse.*
Dukey, Pantsy and Horace (at the audience): *We're prove that you...*
Bling-Bling Boy and Selena: *You/I could do worse.*
Brad (jumps out of the cellar with the pump through his back): *She couldn't possibly do worse!*
Bling-Bling Boy gasped in horror as he saw Brad alive again but with the pump stuck to him.
Brad: Leaving me to die for a week and you're stealing my girlfriend eh?
Bling-Bling Boy: Please Brad. Let me explain.
Brad: I have no time for your pathetic excuse. You will die!
So Brad placed a pipe from the helium on Bling-Bling Boy's mouth which caused Bling-Bling Boy to have a squeaky voice and laughed so hard that he died from laughter.
Brad: I'm so sorry for all of this dear Selena. Are you mad at me?
Selena: How can I be mad at you Brad. The only thing that matters now is that you're back.
Brad: True, but I'm half beer now.
Selena: It doesn't matter to me sweetie.
Brad: Well then how about a beer from me eh?
Selena: Okay.
So Brad gives Selena the unusual beer and they both drink it as the entire cast of the play appear (incliding Bling-Bling Boy).
Everyone: *We hope you enjoyed this year's Halloween story: Ramps of Horror Chapter 25!*
Antonio: shh.
Antonio points at Michael who is sleeping like a baby.
Antonio (whispering): He's sleeping.
End video.
Horace and Pantsy: So what do you think?
SariSpy56: It's really cool and funny at the same time.
Chris: I agree.
Dark Vegan: Well this story on a video is really great. I could see myself on video but as an audience.
Antonio and Michael: So can we!
Bling-Bling Boy: Well this video gives me a great idea on how to win Susan's heart now. Well so long suckers!
Then Bling-Bling Boy flew off back to his island.
Dark Vegan: I don't want to know. So who's next?
Kick: It's my turn to tell a story.
Gunther: What story are you going to tell about Kick?
Kick: I call this one 'Zombieland' and no it's not like the 2009 movie we saw at the movies.
Gunther: Oh...uh?
Helga: Splendid but Pantsy and Horace need at least 2 reviews before we start Kick.
Kick: I'm okay with that.
SariSpy56 and Chris: And remember to stay AWESOME!
Dark Vegan: Enjoy for now earthlings cause I'm going to destroy your world soon!
Harold: Would a slice of toast change your mind?
Dark Vegan: Toast? I love toast!
SariSpy56: That'll shut him up for a while. I'll call Johnny and see what he will do to Dark Vegan later on.
Chris: Okay. Let's try this one more time.
SariSpy56 and Chris: And remember to STAY AWESOME!