Note: I apologize in how long this is taking to get posted, because the computer at home with the Internet connection STILL isn't working! ARGH!

So for those of you who wait with bated breath for the next installment, I am not doing this to keep you hanging. It's because we are, as the saying goes, "experiencing technical difficulties."

By the way, nice birthday present for myself - Vol 1 of the novels of TB. I was quite pleased that without knowing what happens in the novels, I seem to have still followed canon. Go me.

Quick update: something else you might enjoy, for those of you who are fans of UR - check out "Through a Glance Darkly" for more on Abel and Johanna.

Unexpected Results, Part XXV

Me: "Okay, I am officially ready to revolt. We've been traipsing all over Antwerp today chasing after Father Hugue, my feet are killing me, I can't walk nearly as fast as I'm used to, and it's because I'm stuck in a dress and high heels! This is ridiculous!"

Abel: "What are you talking about?"

Me: "You guys get robes and shoes that are much easier to move around in. Where can I get clothes like you two wear? This is stupid that I should be stuck wearing this just because I'm a woman!"

Abel: "B-but all the other Sisters wear them!"

Me: "No, no, no, no, NO. That is IT. Once we get back to Our Lady's Cathedral, I want robes like you two wear."

Father Leon: "You won't look nearly as pretty in those."

Me: "You've never seen me wear black. Besides, hiding a holster is impossible in this dress. At least under a traveling cloak, I have a better chance."

Father Leon: "Admit it, Johanna, you just like being different."

Me: "True."

Abel: "Fine, you win. When we get back, we'll see if there's a priest who wears your size. Shoes might be a problem, though-"

Me: "I wear a size 10 men's shoe."

Abel: "-then again, maybe not."

Me: "Thank God... I feel like I'm dressed properly again. AND I don't have to cover my hair anymore!"

Father Leon: "Welllllll... I take it back, Johanna. I had no idea priests' robes looked that good on a woman!"

Abel: "I don't know, I kind of miss being able to see her- um, well, uh, that is..."

Me: "What was that?"

Abel: "Um, nothing."

Me: "Too bad I don't have a pair of bifocals, I could look just like Father Abel!"

Father Leon: "You want to look like that goofball? OW, watch where you step, Four-Eyes!"

Abel: "Sorry, Leon, guess I didn't realize your foot was on the floor, since it'd appeared to be in your mouth."

Me: "Men!"

Abel: "At any rate, Sister, while you were changing clothes, we got another lead on where Hugue might be."

Me: "Fine, at least with decent boots on, I can still walk. Besides, if we're going to be searching by night, at least it'll be harder for someone else to find me!"

Father Leon: "Except that most vampires have excellent night vision."

Me: "You really know how to inspire confidence, Father Leon, you know that?"

Abel: "You've got your weapons?"

Me: "Yep. The semi-auto's in the shoulder holster, and one of the other Fathers was kind enough to provide me with a hip holster for the Peacekeeper. So, who's ready to get this party started?"

Me: "This is what you call a lead?"

Abel: "What a scene... this is almost as bad as when Tres and I found that Fleurs du Mal hideout."

Me: "I think I'm going to throw up."

Father Leon: "Cops outside have ID'd the victims. Seven vampires, eleven humans."

Abel: "On the surface, it looks like the two groups turned on one another and killed each other."

Me: "Correction - I am going to throw up. I'll be outside..."

Father Leon: "On the surface?"

Abel: "According to the coroner's initial report, the actual causes of death were surgical strikes from a bladed weapon designed to take down a vampire, which of course would work just as well on a human."

Father Leon: "Hugue. But why would he be trying to cover his tracks like this? It's not like him."

Abel: "I don't know, but I guess that's just one more reason we're here."

Father Leon: "One other thing - all of the vampires appear to have been part of the vampire mafia that operates in the Four-City Alliance."

Abel: "The police are still in the middle of investigating, of course, so we won't be able to do much. Johanna, you okay?"

Police officer: "Would you care for a glass of water, Sister?"

Me: "Thank you... oh, shi-"

Abel: "I would never have guessed she'd have that weak of a stomach for this sort of thing."

Father Leon: "Either that or we're a lot more inured to it than she is."

Abel: "You're probably right."

Me: "Ugh... my mouth tastes like the bottom of a bird cage... and to top it off, I feel like a prize idiot."

Father Leon: "Don't feel bad... I've known nuns and priests who've fainted at sights like these. Feel better now?"

Me: "A little."

Abel: "Unfortunately, you'd better get used to this. Hugue tends to leave death in his wake."

Me: "Wonderful... you were saying about these vampires all being mafia?"

Father Leon: "That's right. Not like Hugue to kill humans as well, but if they were working with the vampires, he might bend whatever rules he operates under. Wonder what he was doing going after the local criminal population?"

Me: "Hmmmmm... I wonder. Hey, Father Abel, um... just how cooperative do the local police tend to be with us?"

Abel: "We are in a city ruled by a vampire, Sister. Not nearly as cooperative as you might be hoping."

Me: "Can we at least get a copy of the police report?"

Father Leon: "Probably, why?"

Me: "Well, you said that it's not like Father Hugue to cover his tracks. But try this one on... Father Hugue knows that the vampires of Antwerp are going to be more prepared for him. But what happens if he's trying to stir up the human collaborators so that the vampires won't be entirely certain where the next threat might come from?"

Abel: "'Divide and conquer.' An interesting thought."

Me: "Not to mention he's cutting off two heads of the Hydra at the same time. The vampires won't know which humans are trustworthy, and the humans would think twice about doing business with any vampire that might have an assassin after them if the assassin's not just limiting himself to vampires."

Father Leon: "Bit ruthless, even for him."

Me: "But if he creates too much unrest between the humans and the vampires..."

Abel: "Antwerp will become a war zone. We've got to find Hugue, and fast."

To be continued...