Disclaimer: I own Naruto. He's actually strapped to a metal chair in my bedroom right now. Yeah, I own him. Sasuke's incredibly jealous of me right now. And I know Masashi Kishimoto is jealous…he should have copyrighted Naruto before I stole him. *lawyer whispers in my ear* Oh. Oh no.
Author's Note: A lot of people are both curious about the contents of the safety deposit box, and excited for the inevitable confrontation with Neji when he finds out about Sasuke and Naruto. Well, you still have a little more time for both of those, but give it a couple of chapters.
Chapter Twenty-Five: Love is in the Air
Gaara was incredibly nervous as he waited for Kiba to show up to take him out. Truth be told, he'd been nervous ever since he got home. If everything went as he hoped, this would be a huge step in their relationship.
Ever since the l-word slipped out of Kiba's mouth (which Gaara still wasn't sure if it was planned or if it slipped out), Gaara had been debating it in his mind. Did he love Kiba? They'd only really known each other for a few months, and they'd only been going out for a few weeks. Was it really possible for him to develop such deep feelings so soon? Wasn't that a bad sign?
But really, it didn't take much thought to come up with an answer. Any time they'd gone on a date, Gaara had been nervous. When they were at the party and they (soberly) consummated their relationship, Gaara had been a nervous wreck. They had seemed to be moving pretty fast, but he assumed that was to be expected when their first romantic encounter was steamy sex in the back of Kiba's car.
But still, he couldn't help but second guess himself. He bit his lip. He was always so analytical about things. Heck, his hobby was to look at total strangers and analyze details of their lives that half of them weren't even aware of themselves! The only thing he'd learned from that was that there were too many adulterers in Konoha. Whenever he got into such an intimate relationship with somebody, he'd never cheat on them.
He briefly pictured his romantic future, and was pleasantly surprised to see that Kiba showed up when he thought of himself at 40 or 50. To think that he was already subconsciously planning so far ahead with someone he'd only been going out with for less than a month. It was ridiculous, especially when you consider they're only 18!
Gaara was broken from his thoughts when there was a knock on the door, which caused him to jump in surprise. Regaining his composure, he opened the door, and his jaw dropped at the sight in front of him.
Kiba was dressed in a tight, black muscle shirt with dark blue skinny jeans with rips at the knees. The jeans were lying low enough on Kiba's hips that he was able to see the black boxer briefs sticking out slightly. He knew he was ogling his boyfriend, but he didn't care.
"You like?" Kiba asked with a cocky grin on his face. Gaara didn't really hear what Kiba had said. Instead, he'd continued to stare at the other male, further inflating his ego exponentially by each second.
Gaara wasn't brought back to reality until he heard someone wolf-whistling behind him. Almost immediately, Suigetsu appeared next to Gaara, and it seemed the third male was just as intrigued by Kiba's appearance.
"You're going all out for this date, huh?" Suigetsu asked, smirking himself as Kiba began to blush slightly. A look out of the corner of his eye showed him that Gaara wasn't enjoying Suigetsu's flirting nearly as much as Suigetsu enjoyed it. "If you ever decide Gaara's not enough of a man to keep you interested, you know where to find me," he said with a wink, earning him a smack from Gaara. "Ow, I'm only kidding!" he defended. "Jeez, Kiba, I hope you put out for him tonight. I don't want him to come back all crabby and whiny."
"Ignore him," Gaara said as he left the room, pulling the door closed behind him. "He's the biggest flirt I've ever met."
"He's a pretty big slut too, from what I hear," Kiba said loudly enough for Suigetsu to hear through the door.
"Hey! I heard that!" Suigetsu yelled from inside the room. Gaara smirked and shook his head in mock exasperation before walking with Kiba down the hallway and down the stairs. Their conversation consisted mostly of small talk, as Gaara hoped to wait to talk about the phone call until they were actually at the restaurant they were going to. But the shallowness of the conversation quickly got to Gaara, and he decided to break the ice while they were in the car.
"I was really happy when you called me," Gaara said, surprising Kiba. "The eighteenth time," he clarified. Kiba smirked as they turned the corner in the car. "I was so sure that you were calling me to tell me that your feelings for Naruto were too strong for you to be with me anymore."
Kiba stopped short, and they both leaned forward before their seatbelts snapped them back. Gaara was about to yell at Kiba for the reckless driving when he saw that the Inuzuka was looking right at him.
"Don't ever think that," Kiba said, not once breaking eye contact. "I care about you too much to leave you for anyone." Gaara smiled at the touching remark and looked around to make sure no other cars got too upset at his boyfriend for stopping in the middle of the street. That was when he realized that they weren't going into the city, where the restaurants were, they were in a suburban neighborhood.
"Kiba, where are you taking me?" Gaara asked.
"It's a surprise," Kiba said with a smile as the car started to accelerate some more. It only took a few minutes to get to their destination, which was a pretty big house. The lights were out, and there were no cars in the driveway.
"Where are we?" Gaara asked as Kiba opened his car door for him. As he stepped out, Kiba made a large sweeping motion with his arm and smiled broadly.
"Welcome to Chez Inuzuka," Kiba said with a smile on his face. "My mom and sister are out seeing the new Twilight movie, so I decided to have our date here." Kiba led Gaara, instead of to the front door, to the gate that led to their back yard. Gaara shrugged and followed him into the back yard, and was surprised at what he saw.
On the open lawn, there was a table for two set up. It had what was obviously a nice tablecloth, with a single candle in the middle. There were two covered trays in front of each of the chairs. Gaara couldn't help but smile at the romantic gesture. And it was a perfect day to eat outside. It had ceased to be warm like the summer, but had yet to become frigid.
There were two trees in the back yard that both had very beautiful leaves. The colors had started to change, and the colors were picturesque. It had the perfect mixture of orange, yellow, red and green leaves that it looked as if it was taken straight from a painting. Next to one of the trees was a small doghouse that had the name Akamaru written on the top in very sloppy handwriting, and Gaara saw a small head poke out of it.
Upon seeing the two, the dog raced out to greet Kiba. He was a pretty small dog – probably a shih-Tzu or a corgi. It had a beautiful, white fur coat, and its tail wagged speedily as he greeted Kiba. The Inuzuka laughed as he knelt down to pet the dog and the dog, in turn, began licking his face.
"Gaara, this is Akamaru," Kiba said, lifting the dog so that Gaara could hold him. "Akamaru, this is Gaara," he said to the dog. Gaara took the dog from Kiba's waiting hands and was surprised by how soft his coat was. As he pet the dog, his tail continued to wag, and at one point, he reached his face up and licked Gaara's cheek. "He likes you," he told Gaara.
"Like master, like pup," Gaara said with a shrug as he placed the dog down. Kiba smirked, and he led Gaara to the table. When they got there, Kiba pulled out a chair, and motioned with his hand for Gaara to sit. "What a gentleman," Gaara said with mock surprise as Kiba pushed him in. Kiba then walked around to the other side, sitting down in his own seat.
Gaara was surprised at the layout on the table. It was as if they were at a fancy restaurant. There were three forks with increasing size on the left, and two spoons, a butter knife, and a fork knife on the right. There was a smaller spoon horizontally above the plate, and two glasses – one for wine, one for water. He saw a water pitcher on the table next to the candle, and on the other side of the candle was a flower in a vase. There was also a cloth napkin, which Gaara unfolded and placed on his lap. He wondered what exactly the Inuzuka had cooked for him that he would need so much silverware.
"Are you ready to see tonight's entre?" Kiba asked with a smile. He and Gaara both pulled off the covers at the same time, and Gaara was shocked by what he saw.
"Kiba?" Gaara asked, not believing if this was real or if Ashton Kutcher was waiting in the bushes with a camera crew.
"Yes?" Kiba asked as he took a fork and began to eat.
"Why did you lay out so much silverware for a plate of Mac N Cheese?" Gaara asked as the brunet wolfed down a forkful.
"I wanted it to look fancy," he said defensively. "What, you don't like it?"
"Of course I like it," Gaara said. "It just looked like it was going to be steak, or lobster or something."
"Well, I can't really cook that well," Kiba admitted. "It was either this or a Grilled Cheese. And I actually tend to burn those, so this was the only good option." Gaara smiled at the Inuzuka, realizing that it didn't have to be lobster or steak. No expensive date could compare to what Kiba had pulled off tonight. He was right – the abundance of silverware and other fancy decorations made the night seem special, even if they were only eating Mac N Cheese.
Gaara began to eat, and he noticed something that made him smile even more. This wasn't even home cooked Mac N Cheese! It was Easy Mac! But it was oddly sweet, knowing that Kiba spent much more time and energy focusing on the ambiance than the food itself. The gesture was definitely appreciated.
"Hey, Kiba?" Gaara asked, trying to get the brunet's attention. "I think we have to talk."
"That's never good," Kiba muttered under his breath. "What about?" he asked, a little louder.
"It's about what you said earlier," Gaara said, ready to gauge Kiba's reaction. One of the most important things was to know whether Kiba had actually known what he said, or if it was said in the heat of the moment and had easily forgotten it. Kiba looked down at the candle on the table with a slight red tinting on his cheeks, and Gaara presumed he had his answer.
"So you heard that?" Kiba asked, sounding almost sad.
"I understand if it's not true," Gaara said, preparing himself for the worst. "I mean, you were rambling, and you could have gotten caught up in the heat of the moment."
"It's not that," Kiba said, the blush spreading over his features. "I just…wanted to tell you in a more special way. That's why I did this whole thing." Gaara's eyebrows rose in pleasant surprise upon hearing the confession, but he still wasn't expecting the next words that came out of the brunet's mouth. "I love you, Gaara."
Gaara's smile widened so that it was threatening to rip his face in half, which he realized was pretty uncharacteristic of him. He didn't smile often, but it seemed he was smiling more and more since Kiba had come into the picture. He lowered his head so he was staring at his lap, enjoying the feeling he had upon hearing those three words. His stomach bubbled, and he felt so giddy, which was something else uncharacteristic of him. He was feeling so giddy, in fact, that he didn't even realize that Kiba was probably on the edge of his seat, waiting with baited breath to see the redhead's response. Gaara looked up and his eyes locked with Kiba's.
"I love you, too, Kiba," he said, taking a mental picture of the way Kiba's smile slowly expanded until it matched the one that was on Gaara's face. Kiba put the index finger and thumb of his right hand to his tongue and wet them up before using them to distinguish the flame on the candle.
"Why don't we go inside?" he asked, the smile not fading. He stood up and held his hand out for Gaara to grab, and they walked into the house holding hands. After turning the lights on in the house, Kiba led the redhead to the living room, where they walked towards the couch.
Gaara lowered his face to meet Kiba's lips, and the redhead felt a surge of heat as they touched. Wasting no time, Gaara opened his mouth to deepen the kiss, and Kiba obliged. He brushed his tongue against the roof of Gaara's mouth, savoring the sweet taste of Mac N Cheese that still lingered. Gaara moved his hands up Kiba's shirt and lightly touched the Inuzuka's chest before pulling the entire shirt over his head. Their lips reconnected, and they kissed feverishly, while still maintaining the same passion fueled lust from before.
Kiba left Gaara's lips and moved his own down towards the younger's collarbone, licking the hallow of his neck while he unbuttoned the buttons on Gaara's shirt. The redhead threw his head back as Kiba sucked on his pulse, and their hips bucked together, hardness meeting hardness. Finally, when Kiba managed to undo all the buttons, he discarded the redhead's shirt before standing up, holding Gaara in place. He turned around and laid Gaara down on the sofa before straddling the lying boy's hips.
With increased fervor, Kiba started to lick down Gaara's torso, relishing the flavor of the other teen. He stopped at Gaara's right nipple and breathed over it, enticing a strangled moan from the excited redhead. He lowered his mouth and began to suck, increasing the pleasure for his lover. He lifted his face and moved to the other nipple, ghosting his breath over it like he did the other. As he lowered his head to suck, he unbuttoned Gaara's pants, lowering them in a single motion and gripping the cock in his hand.
The redhead was a quivering mess as Kiba simultaneously stroked his cock and sucked his nipples. Kiba felt a painful tightness in his pants, but he was too busy taking care of Gaara. There would be time for him to get off later. Gaara, needing to participate in some way, brushed his fingers through Kiba's hair as he came up for air. He licked a circle around the nipple, causing Gaara to lightly pull at the hair, losing himself in pleasure.
After a while, Kiba felt Gaara getting close to orgasm, and he lifted himself off the redhead's chest. Gaara groaned at the lack of contact, but the groan soon turned to moan as Kiba instead attached his lips to the head of Gaara's cock. He barely had time to adjust before Gaara started shooting stream after stream of cum down Kiba's throat. Not wanting to disappoint his lover, Kiba swallowed every last drop, licking his lips when he was done.
After it was done, Gaara sat up and leant over, unbuttoning Kiba's pants and pulling them down in a single motion along with the brunet's underwear. Kiba sat back as Gaara moved between his knees, lightly kissing the Inuzuka's inner thighs. Kiba, already excited from getting Gaara off, moaned when Gaara licked a trail up his right thigh and up the shaft of his throbbing erection.
The redhead circled his tongue around the head of Kiba's manhood before engulfing nearly all of it. He gagged at first and pulled back, but he dove back in again, trying to adjust. Kiba was paralyzed in pleasure as Gaara finally got a steady rhythm going. The redhead was slowly working his way further, taking more and more of his boyfriend's cock with each bob.
Finally, Gaara pulled completely off the cock, eliciting a whine from the Inuzuka. But before Kiba could verbally protest, Gaara impaled his face back on the cock, taking Kiba all the way. The pleasure was too much for Kiba, who shot his load down Gaara's throat. After milking the softening appendage for all it was worth, Gaara stood up and sat down on the sofa, leaning his head on Kiba's shoulder.
"Not that I want to ruin the moment or anything," Kiba began, "but Hana and Mom are gonna be back any minute now, and it'll be pretty awkward for us if they walk in on this." Gaara groaned, and the two reluctantly picked up their clothes and went up to Kiba's room. They both got into the single bed and cuddled up, already tired despite the fact that it was only 9:30.
Shikamaru Nara hated one thing above all others, and that was when he was disturbed while napping. He took pride in his excessive sleeping, and he didn't appreciate it when all his hard work was wasted when he was woken up. That's why when he heard a rapid rapping on his door that evening, he groaned as he slowly faded to consciousness.
"Come in!" he called, too lazy to get up and let whoever it was in. He heard the door open, and whoever had opened it turned on the light. For a second, he expected to see his roommate, but then he realized that his roommate wouldn't have knocked. He looked up towards the door to see Ino, surprise clearly written on his face.
"Did you forget to yell at me about something else?" Shikamaru asked, boredom evident in his voice. Ino glared slightly at the provocation and had to remind herself to calm down. She sighed deeply before speaking up.
"I actually came here to apologize," she said, her voice dripping with forced serenity. "You were right. Kiba and Naruto worked everything out, and I didn't have to involve myself."
"Of course I was right," Shikamaru said, angering Ino.
"You know, you think you're such a genius!" she chided angrily.
"Actually, I am," Shikamaru said. "I have an IQ of 206. I just choose to be lazy."
"Well, you're doing a great job of that," Ino said, trying to hide the surprise she experienced regarding the lazy teen's intelligence. "But you aren't nearly as smart as you think you are."
"Really?" Shikamaru asked. "Why's that?"
"Because you're socially retarded," she said bluntly, causing the lazy brunet to raise an eyebrow. "I mean, seriously! You might be smart, but you can be so dumb sometimes! You have no semblance of social skills!"
Shikamaru closed his eyes, choosing not to participate in the conversation. It's not that he thought that what Ino said was untrue, because he knew it was very true. He'd never been able to really connect with people like people expected him to. He was always too apathetic, always expecting that things will come to him without any effort put in just because of his genius.
He'd realized in high school that a social life wasn't just going to happen to him. He'd have to actually pursue it. But by then, it was too late. He didn't really care to put in the extra effort, and he didn't feel comfortable putting himself in a situation where he wasn't the genius. He would be putting himself in a position that he wasn't familiar with, and that had never happened before.
At the same time, he was somewhat of a narcissist. He knew he was what experts would call "an immeasurable genius", and he developed a large ego. By the time he'd decided that it was important to really make friends, he was too wrapped up in his own being to really think of anyone else as worthy of being his friend.
Then, he met Temari and everything changed.
Temari was somewhat of a loner as well. She was pretty attractive, which was odd considering she only had one true friend. Shikamaru had seen her around, even though she was a grade older than him. She and her friend, Miko, would always be walking together, laughing it up. They were inseparable.
And then Miko moved to Suna, and Temari was suddenly alone. Shikamaru would see her sitting at a table by herself, and realized that that could be his only chance to really become someone's friend. After all, the most uncomfortable part about looking to make friends was the possibility of rejection. But, as the saying goes, beggars can't be choosers. He couldn't imagine someone like Temari would push him away.
He started sitting at her table for lunch, and they got to talking. They didn't really have much in common, since Shikamaru really didn't do much except watch TV or sleep. She decided that she would help Shikamaru get a life, and she started dragging him out to the mall. They'd go shopping, see a movie, and do normal things. To tell the truth, Shikamaru kind of enjoyed feeling normal.
When Shikamaru became a junior and Temari became a senior, they had decided to be more than friends. Shikamaru was slowly being pulled out of his shell, and, even though to the average bystander he seemed like the same lazy guy, he became more normal. He could joke around, and he could easily begin to relate to others. Something had changed in him when he started hanging out with Temari. Soon, he even started hanging out with her twin brother, Kankuro, and they became friends as well.
Shikamaru became just a slightly lazy guy. He wasn't narcissistic, or weird, or alone anymore. Then, when Temari and Kankuro graduated, Kankuro moved to attend Suna University, while Temari decided to stay in Konoha and attend Konoha University.
Shikamaru had befriended a new kid named Shino, not appreciating the fact that he was left alone. Shino was very quiet and reserved, however, and their friendship took a while to really grow. But eventually, they became good enough friends. His relationship with Temari, meanwhile, was just going downhill. At first, she had no time for him because she was too busy studying and doing schoolwork. But then, towards the end of December and through January, she decided to take advantage of the month long holiday to get closer to Shikamaru.
She got very needy, however, and she was suffocating Shikamaru. He didn't have the time to laze about for an hour or so a day anymore, as she always had to be with him. They'd gone on so many dates in that month, it was ridiculous. Almost every night, and Shikamaru was getting tired of it. Then came the insatiable libido caused from not being intimate with him since before school started.
Shikamaru couldn't handle it anymore. That was what had caused him to meet Ino, actually. He had tried to hide from Temari in her car, and Temari found them. She had such a jealous rage, but later that day, she apologized and acted sweet. Ever since then, she got overprotective of Shikamaru, however, and it didn't take much to get her to show her jealousy.
That was why Shikamaru ended things with Temari. And after he had washed his hands clean of her, he graduated. Shino went his way to Iwa to study entomology, and Shikamaru was suddenly alone again. But he had met Ino, and they'd run into each other often enough to make Shikamaru think of her as a possible friend. He'd also met a couple people in his classes who he was friendly enough with.
But still, even though he'd come a long way since he was the antisocial, narcissistic, apathetic kid, that same person would show himself every now and then. He did sometimes act like he was better than others, and he was sometimes a know it all. He was pretty sure that was what really caused Ino to flip out on him yesterday. And without the daily social interaction, Shikamaru felt that he was regressing more and more into that person he used to be, and he didn't like that.
"Fine," Shikamaru said. "You think I lack social skills, then teach me." He made it sound almost like a challenge, and Ino quirked an eyebrow. "I'm tutoring you in history still, so you can tutor me in being social."
"Are you serious?" Ino asked. "I don't think you can just be taught social skills except by practice."
"Then let's hang out more often," Shikamaru said with a lazy shrug. "If you really hate it that much, I'm sure I'll be cured of my 'social retardation' in no time," he said, using air quotes for the two words.
"Fine," Ino said, sounding as if she accepted Shikamaru's challenge. "I guess we'll hang out tomorrow."
"Good," Shikamaru said. "Just not before noon. I'm a late sleeper." Ino agreed and she awkwardly left the room, leaving Shikamaru with one thought.
Wait, did I just ask her to be my friend?
Naruto and Sasuke finally got home at about 9:30 in the evening. After they had finished up at Mr. Akihiko's office, they had gone to Ichiraku for some dinner before returning to their dorm room. They were silent for most of the meal and car rides, but not uncomfortably so. In fact, it was a very pleasant silence.
Naruto was quite pleased with the events that happened today. Well, not the whole 'Sasuke-is-missing' part and not the whole 'Sasuke-falling-apart-during-the-reading-of-Madara's-will' part, but the part afterwards when he was able to comfort the raven. He had been so used to the one needing all the protection and the support. That was in part why he didn't really want to talk to Sasuke about the nightmares he'd been having. He didn't really want to need protection anymore.
But this was new territory. Never before had Sasuke shown true vulnerability to the blond. Well, he had in a sense when he'd admitted to his feelings, but he'd never really let himself fall apart in Naruto's arms. As much as he didn't want Sasuke to hurt, he was glad that he was able to make Sasuke feel better for a change.
"Are you okay?" Naruto asked when they finally reached their room. Sasuke nodded silently, lost in thought about the day. "Maybe sometime after classes this week, we'll go over to the bank and get the things from the safety deposit box, okay?"
"No," Sasuke said, shocking the blond. "I don't want to know what's in there."
"But he wanted you to see it," Naruto said. "There has to be a reason, right?"
"I don't want to talk about this," Sasuke said as he sat down on Naruto's bed next to his boyfriend. "I've thought way too much about Madara today." Naruto nodded in understanding. "There is one thing that I do want to think about," he said.
Before Naruto could question him, Sasuke firmly pressed his lips to the blonde's, letting all his pent up emotion out. Naruto moaned into the kiss, opening his mouth for Sasuke to invade with his tongue. They rearranged themselves so that Sasuke was lying on top of Naruto as they kissed, and Naruto felt a hardness pressing against his own. It didn't register, however, until he felt Sasuke try to lift his shirt off.
"Wait, Sasuke," Naruto said as the Uchiha discarded the shirt and began to lick behind his ear. "We have to…nngh…talk," he said, a moan escaping his lips midsentence.
"You talk," Sasuke said as he planted small kisses on Naruto's jaw line. "I'll kiss." He planted his lips to Naruto's throat, and the blond unconsciously thrust up into the raven's pelvis.
"Sasuke, please stop," Naruto asked, shocking the raven. He sat up and looked into his boyfriend's eyes, seeing the serious expression on his face. He frowned.
"What's wrong?" Sasuke asked, not liking the tone that Naruto was using. He got off of Naruto, choosing instead to sit further back on the bed and look him in the eye.
"I've been having dreams the last couple of nights," Naruto said, causing Sasuke's mood to change dramatically. Sasuke had been aware that his boyfriend had been having nightmares. How could he not when he was the one comforting him every morning? But he saw that Naruto had not wanted to talk about it, so he decided to wait until the blond was comfortable enough to open up. And now that it seemed that moment was upon him, he wanted to be serious.
"What are they about?" Sasuke asked, not wanting to push the blond too far.
"Th-They start off in some sort of sewer," Naruto explained, the memory of the dreams causing him to shake. "There's this big jail cell, and there's an orange fox with nine tails trapped inside it. And he always tells me that as long as…as long as I'm a f-faggot, then I need to get what I deserve." Sasuke, beginning to understand exactly what came next in the dream, repositioned himself so that he was holding his boyfriend. "Then, he turns into Kyuubi, and…" he trailed off, knowing that Sasuke got the picture. He refused to cry this time. He needed to stay strong so that he could tell Sasuke about the rest of what was going on.
"I spoke to Dr. Kishimoto about it," Naruto said. "He told me that it's been happening because of my relationship with you, and that there's still a part of me resisting being intimate with you, even if it's only subconscious." Sasuke nodded, beginning to understand what Naruto was getting to. "He told me that we should have a talk and outline exactly what I'm comfortable with, and agree not to go further until I'm ready. I mean, if that's okay with you, of course," he added as an afterthought.
"Of course," Sasuke said instantly. "I wouldn't want to go further with you if you'll just associate it with what that monster did to you. We don't have to go any further until you're ready." Naruto nodded, his eyes closed, obviously trying not to cry. Then, suddenly, he opened his eyes, a determined expression on his face.
"I want to tell you what happened that night," Naruto finally said. Sasuke couldn't hide the shock on his face at first, but he then squelched the emotion and shook his head.
"You don't have to," he said. "I walked in on it. I saw it."
"But you only saw the end," Naruto said. "He did more than just rape me." Sasuke went silent, realizing that Naruto not only wanted, but needed to get this out. After a few seconds, he nodded, indicating that it was okay for Naruto to go on. "I wasn't even supposed to be home that day. You remember, right?"
Sasuke nodded, his expression somber. "I was being cruel to you. I kissed you, and then accused you of liking it. I drove you away." Naruto nodded in response.
"It's not like I blame you for it or anything," Naruto said. "It's not like you could have known what was going to happen." Sasuke reached up and cupped Naruto's face, moving the blonde's head slightly so that he was looking in his eyes.
"I'm still so, so sorry," Sasuke said. "If I could take it back, I would do it in an instant." Naruto nodded, acknowledging what Sasuke said.
"I know," he said. "When I got home, I was surprised to see Kyuubi there. I hadn't seen him in years. I did expect him to come back one day, but it was so out of the blue for me. It had been so long that I almost convinced myself he'd died, or he'd found a new family far, far away. Ino and I would talk about him, and we'd talk as if he was dead, because to us, he was dead."
"That's why when I first heard about you two living together, she told me your father had died," Sasuke surmised.
"It was partly that and partly that it wasn't really any of your business," Naruto said with a small smile. "I don't like to advertise that my father was abusive and that I was adoptive, so we'd just tell people that my father died and her father was a family friend, so he took me in." Sasuke nodded in understanding. "Anyway, when I first saw him, I was so scared, but I was also hopeful. A part of me had hoped for a second that he was there to mend fences.
"But he seemed so weird," Naruto continued. "He was sitting on the couch as if he did it every day, and he had a coldness to his voice. I told him to leave, but he refused. I tried to stand my ground, even though I heard the anger and violence in his voice. I threatened to call the police, but he just called me ungrateful. He said he'd been watching me for a while, and something happened that day to spark the visit."
Sasuke looked at Naruto with questioning eyes, and Naruto wanted to think of some way to make what he had to say not as hard on Sasuke. After a few seconds, he realized that there was no way to soften this blow, so he just continued.
"He saw you kiss me, and he decided to teach me a lesson about being a faggot," Naruto said, closing his eyes. In the darkness of his mind, he was able to see his dead father as if he was standing in front of him. "I obviously told him that I wasn't gay, but he didn't believe me. Or maybe he just wanted to make sure, I don't know."
"Naruto –" Sasuke began, but Naruto cut him off.
"That's when he locked the door," Naruto said, ignoring Sasuke. "And he pulled out a gun, and told me he was going to 'save me from those faggots'." He took a deep breath and continued. "He told me that after that day, I'd never want to take it up the ass again, and he told me there were two ways that it would go down. He could either make it so that I didn't want it, or…" Naruto trailed off, and he felt Sasuke caressing his thigh, trying to comfort the blond. "Or he could make sure that they couldn't have me."
"I'm so sorry," Sasuke said, tears starting to build in his eyes. Guilt was eating at him at all corners now, not just from Madara anymore. Now, he was reminded that it was his fault that Naruto was in the position he was, even more so than he'd previously thought. Naruto placed his hand over the one Sasuke was using to comfort him and stopped the movements.
"He told me to take off my clothes, and I was confused," Naruto continued. "I guess I sort of knew what he was planning to do, but I didn't actually expect it to happen. He fired a warning shot, and it scared me enough to take my shirt and pants off. And then, he forced me to get completely naked."
Sasuke sat and watched as Naruto told the story, feeling so helpless. Here was the person he loved, who was already put through such an ordeal because of him. And now, he was putting himself through it all over again and experiencing the same pain, and Sasuke could do nothing but listen. He hated feelings so powerless.
"He said, 'Come here'," Naruto continued, his eyes beginning to be glazed over as the memory continued to play itself out in his mind. "His voice was so full of anger and menace. It scared me, and I obeyed. He told me to get on my knees, and he shoved his erection down my throat. He told me that if he felt any teeth, he'd kill me.
"It wasn't a blow job, it was just him fucking my face," Naruto said monotonously. "I could barely breathe, but he eventually gave up on that. I thought I was in the clear, but he had other plans. He flipped me over, and I pleaded with him. I promised him I'd never be gay, but he said he needed to ensure it." Naruto took a deep breath. "That was when he…he raped me," the blond concluded. "I must have passed out from the pain, because the next thing I remember was waking up in the hospital thinking I was a girl."
"I'm so sorry, Naruto," Sasuke said, the story having brought him on the verge of tears. "I never wanted that to happen to you, I swear."
"I know you didn't," Naruto said, the grim look still on his face. "But sometimes, I can still feel the ache in my jaw or a slight pain in my butt. I know it's just psychosomatic, but it still haunts me. And I go through it again every night, or at least I have for the past few nights."
"Since we first got together," Sasuke added, vocalizing the unsaid words from the end of Naruto's sentence. "I keep causing you so much pain. You were only there in the first place because I was an asshole to you, and he was only there in the first place because I kissed you. And now, our relationship is causing you to relive it over and over again."
"I know it wasn't your fault, Sasuke," Naruto said.
"No!" Sasuke said, feeling his own tears making his cheeks wet. He stood up so that he could look at Naruto, his distress clearly evident to the blond. "It was my fault. If I hadn't decided to twist my arm and force you to pretend to be my boyfriend, none of this would have happened."
"I'm glad you did that, Sasuke," Naruto admitted. "If it wasn't for that, I would have continued to sit at my lunch table and you at yours. We would never have interacted, and I never would have started to fall for you. As much as what happened hurts, I can't imagine how much worse it would have been to not have you there."
"But it wouldn't have happened if I wasn't there in the first place," Sasuke insisted. "That's why I…" he trailed off, not wanting to complete his sentence.
"That's why you what?" Naruto asked.
"After the paramedics brought you to the hospital after you were raped, I followed in my car," Sasuke admitted. "But I didn't have the courage to face you. I didn't know he raped you because of me, but I knew that you were in his line of fire because of me. And I killed him. As much as he was a monster, I still took his life. And I guess I just freaked out."
"That's perfectly understandable," Naruto said, but Sasuke shook his head.
"I went to the roof of the hospital," Sasuke told him. "I stood on the edge, and I was seriously contemplating jumping. I had gone through it in my head, and I was coming up blank on reasons not to. I'm sure Inoichi, Kiba, Tsunade and Jiraya wouldn't have minded. My friends all had each other, and Itachi had his friends. There was no reason for me to stay."
"Then why didn't you jump?" Naruto asked after he gulped. He couldn't imagine how much worse life would have been if Sasuke had killed himself that day.
"Because Ino found me," Sasuke said. "She tried to talk me down, but I refused. So instead, she stood next to me and told me that if I jumped, she'd jump too." Naruto's eyes widened in shock, never having known how close he came to a life of loneliness. "I knew that after what I'd caused, I couldn't kill myself if you'd lose her, too. I decided to just wait until I was alone to do it, and then everyone would have been better off."
"What stopped you?" Naruto asked, his eyes brimming with unshed tears.
"Well, when the doctor told me about your condition and that it would be best to play along, I knew that it was the least I could do," Sasuke admitted. "If I stayed around as your boyfriend, then I figured I could somewhat make up for what I did. But no matter what I do for you, I could never truly make up for the pain I caused you."
"But it wasn't your fault," Naruto insisted.
"Stop saying that!" Sasuke yelled. "It was my fault. I know it, and deep down, you know it too. I love you so much, Naruto, and I just keep hurting you over and over again, and I don't know what to do. I guess I'm selfish, because if I really loved you, I'd just leave you alone, but I can't do that. No matter how much hurt I cause you, I need you. And I know it's incredibly selfish, but I just don't want to let you go."
"I'm not going anywhere," Naruto said, standing up to hug Sasuke. "I can't imagine not having you here. If you left me, I'd be much more hurt than anything that could result from our relationship." Sasuke lowered his head to Naruto's shoulders, making the blonde's shirt wet.
"How can you stand to be with me?" Sasuke asked between sobs. "How can you look at me and not feel resentment?"
"Because I don't blame you," Naruto said. "As much as your actions did put me in the situation, I don't blame you. It's not like you knew Kyuubi was going to rape me. For god's sake, you thought I was an orphan! There was no way you could have known that this was going to happen."
Sasuke visibly relaxed into the embrace at Naruto's words, but he continued to cry. Naruto felt himself tear up at the display of emotion from the Uchiha. Never before had he bared his soul so fully for display. When he told Naruto about his parents and Madara, he didn't break down, nor did he break down when he found out about Madara (at least not in front of anyone). He always kept his emotions so safely guarded and masked that to actually see him like this was…it was astounding!
"I'm sorry," Sasuke said, still blaming himself for Naruto had gone through. Naruto, aware of the battle within the Uchiha, sighed and pulled Sasuke's face up. His eyes were red and puffy from crying, and he was sporting a small blush from having shown such emotion and vulnerability. Before the raven had a chance to question Naruto, the blond pulled the other's face towards his own, releasing all his pent up emotion into the kiss.
Sasuke didn't deepen the kiss, but he did respond with equal fervor. The emotionally charged moment was giving way to passion, as they comforted each other through the meeting of their lips. Sasuke pulled the blond closer to him as he devoured the pink lips in front of him. He was desperate for as much contact from Naruto as possible, almost as if he'd lose the blond if he didn't hold on tight.
Realizing that he made this point, Naruto started to slowly pull back, making sure to look in Sasuke's eyes as he did so. "I know," he said with a small smile. "I will always be there for you, on one condition," he said. Sasuke's eyes widened and he wondered what the condition was. As if he was reading his mind, Naruto answered the unasked question. "Please always be there for me."
"Always and forever," Sasuke said as he pulled the blond into a tighter hug. Naruto smiled and closed his eyes, enjoying the closeness with the Uchiha. When he opened them again, he was shocked at what he saw behind Sasuke.
Kyuubi was standing there in the same clothes he'd worn that night. He had a bullet hole in the middle of his forehead where Sasuke had shot him, and a small trickle of blood was flowing down his forehead. Naruto could immediately tell he was seeing things, and he rationally knew that Kyuubi wasn't really standing there.
"You think that's love?" the phantom Kyuubi asked Naruto, and the blond froze up a bit. Based off Sasuke's reaction, he realized he was just hearing things, which was even worse. "Two men could never fall in love. You think you can move past what I did and fall in love with him, but you're dead wrong. You will never be able to give yourself to him completely. You'll never truly become the faggot that, for some strange reason, you want to be."
Naruto closed his eyes and Sasuke pulled back to look at the blond. He was concerned, as Naruto seemed to tense up for no reason at all. He saw the blond squeeze his eyes tight before opening again. Upon seeing that the phantom Kyuubi had disappeared, Naruto let out a sigh of relief that didn't go unnoticed by Sasuke, who quirked a brow.
"Let's go to bed," Naruto suggested, not wanting to tell Sasuke about seeing Kyuubi. They got undressed to their underwear and crept into bed together, embracing each other. As he drifted off into sleep, Naruto silently worried. Between the nightmares and now seeing his dead, rapist father, was he going crazy again? He didn't get much sleep that night.
Author's Note: Well, it looks like Naruto's not completely out of the woods yet. One reviewer, borderlinecrazy, said it best: " And, you're portraying how when things go bad, they go really bad, and have consequences we don't fully understand ourselves, and can't fully deal with very, very accurately." While things aren't as bad as they might have been 15-20 chapters ago, Naruto's not out of the woods yet, and it's going to take some time until he's better.
Anyways, I spent a lot of time focusing on the side stories - Kiba and Gaara, and Ino and Shikamaru. The next few chapters are going to be a lot of plot-advancement, so I decided to put a few scenes of people being normal before things rev up again. Especially because Kiba and Gaara won't be as front-and-center as they have been for a while.
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