*A.N. - The scars we have, both inside and outside, are what make us who we are. Here is Sam's past. I will not even answer for my beta how much of this may or may not be my own experiences or may be the experiences of those that are closest to me. This is a work of fiction, not an exclamation of fact so please don't ask. ~ M.M.*
Chapter 25
The next week began and the team noticed a change in the atmosphere. Derek was calm, relaxed, almost Zen-like instead of suave. They noticed him staring at his computer screen with a thoughtful look and they noticed him stealing glances at Sam when she wasn't looking.
The phone on Sam's desk rang. "Ryan" was the brisk answer she gave.
The receptionist at the front desk was on the line. "Agent Ryan, we just issued a visitor's pass to your mother. We thought you would like to know that she is on her way up."
Sam was stunned. "I don't have a mother so that would be impossible. Who did you send up?" was the demanding reply to the poor receptionist.
"I'm sorry Agent. She claimed … I thought…"
"Never mind, we'll go over this later." and with that Sam hung up and stood up unlocking her desk drawer and tucking her Glock into the waistband at the small of her back.
"What's wrong?" asked Morgan sharply, slightly unnerved by the conversation he had overheard as well as the actions his teammate was taking.
"A woman is on her way up here claiming to be my mother. I don't know who or what is about to walk through those elevator doors."
Prentiss, JJ, Reid and Morgan quickly unlocked their sidearms and holstered them on their persons. "Reid, bring Hotch and Rossi up to speed." was the brisk command from Morgan as he moved to stand next to Sam. Prentiss and JJ moved to stand behind and on either side of the pair presenting a united front to whomever was about to walk out. They heard Rossi, Hotch, and Reid move to the railing behind them.
The elevator doors opened and a middle-aged woman walked out, seeming startled by the group of unfriendly agents looking at her. Her gaze settled on the young auburn haired woman and she began to walk towards her.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing here?" was bitten out by a suddenly pale Sam, malice dripping from every word.
"Samantha, I'm your mother. I needed to see you…" the woman began before being cut off.
"You may have been the bitch that gave birth to me but that damn sure doesn't make you my mother." was the agent's retort. The team began to close ranks on Sam, noticing that she had gone from pale to flushed, that her hands were clenched tightly at her sides, and that she was practically vibrating with fury.
"Samantha…"
"Seventeen years! It's been seventeen years since I've seen you. The last day I saw you was at the trial. You were convicted and sent to jail with a ten year sentence. Your parental rights were terminated. You've had plenty of time to say that you were sorry and you haven't even tried. You never tried to take any responsibility for what happened; you never did anything period! You've had time to try and gain my forgiveness, so why bother contacting me now?!"
Morgan placed a hand on Sam's shoulder wondering if he was going to have to physically restrain her from this woman. "Ma'am, if you would state your business with Supervisory Special Agent Ryan we could address it and you could be on your way."
"I came to warn her. Samantha, he's planning on escaping and he's furious with both of us. He sent me this letter." she held out a plain envelope. When Sam made no move to take it, Prentiss strode forward to accept the letter and dropped back to her previous position.
"You've said what you came here to say. Now I think you should leave before I have armed federal agents escort you out." was the toneless reply from Sam.
"Darling, I'm your mother, I'm just trying to protect you." was the woman's plea.
"You are not my mother! A mother would die to protect her child! You threw me to the wolves! You watched and didn't even say a word to stop it and they you just disappeared and let it continue! You are the reason it happened you self-centered bitch! You gave ME to HIM to keep HIM interested in YOU!" By now Morgan had his arms wrapped around the shrieking Sam from behind, holding her back from flying across the bullpen and effectively pinning her gun between her back and his front.
Hotch's voice cut across the bullpen. "Ma'am, I appreciate you bringing my agent your warning. Now I think you should leave."
The woman looked at the people surrounding her daughter. Something broke inside of her. In that instant she lost what little hope she had that she would ever be able to be any part of her daughter's life. Samantha had grown up without her and was making her own family of people who obviously cared about her. She turned and walked briskly back to the elevator, unable to stand the condescension of her daughter or the coldness of the rest of the team.
As the elevator doors closed Hotch was the one to break the tension. "Prentiss, I want to see that letter. Ryan, my office, now."
Prentiss walked the letter to Hotch and retreated. Hotch and Rossi silently entered his office to await Sam. Morgan continued to keep his arms around Sam. He leaned over to rest his chin on her shoulder as he whispered in her ear "You OK for me to let go Princess? You're not gonna pass out on me, are you?"
He felt her body suddenly go slack and her hands came up to grip his forearms lightly.
"It's OK now. She isn't here to hit and I don't have line of sight to shoot her." came the monotone reply.
Morgan was worried. She seemed suddenly exhausted and didn't even dispute him calling her Princess. What had this woman done to cause such hatred in her own child? That Sam was her daughter wasn't in question. She may have her dad's hair color and smile, but the expressive eyes, high cheekbones, and stubborn chin all screamed familial resemblance to the woman who had just caused the uproar in the bullpen.
"Let go Morgan, I have to go face the music." came out in a flat voice.
Morgan reluctantly unwound his arms from around his teammate and stepped back from her. He noticed her shoulders were slumped and her chin was down. With slightly shaking hands she pulled her sidearm out from her back and locked it back in the top drawer of her desk before making her way to Hotch's office. She looked like she was walking to her execution. As the office door was closed behind her, the rest of the team settled in to wait and see what the outcome of the discussion would be.
Sam closed the office door with a heavy heart before moving to take a seat in front of Hotch's desk. Rossi held the letter her mother had delivered in his hands and appeared to be re-reading it. She assumed Hotch had been the first to view the contents.
"Agent Ryan," Hotch paused. "Sam, this letter contains a direct threat against you, a federal agent, by one Travis Muscovy who, if the return address is correct, is currently a guest of the prison system of the Commonwealth of Virginia. He also threatens your mother. What's going on Sam? Why would this man do this?" Hotch was firm with his question but somewhat softer in his delivery than he usually would have been. It wasn't sitting well with him that one of his agents was being threatened.
"Sir, this will go better if I can have an hour for Garcia to pull the case file." Sam replied without raising her eyes from the floor.
"Agent Ryan, what is going on?" was asked in the same tone that ordered her mother from the building.
Raising her eyes to meet her superiors Sam flatly stated. "Travis Muscovy is the man who preyed on me with my mother's permission when I was ten years old. At eleven I testified at his trial and he was sentenced to one hundred and twelve years in prison to be served consecutively. He won't be eligible for parole until he had served at least seventy-five of those years. I am the reason that man essentially got a life sentence."
Rossi jumped in. "Sam, have Garcia pull the files. We will meet back here in an hour and go over the details."
Hotch remained silent as Sam rose and exited the room. Rossi let out a deep breath. "Aaron, we need to contact Wallens Ridge and see just how well Mr. Muscovy is being monitored. Then, we need to review the case, speak to prison workers, and build a profile on this man. That letter contains a lot of rage and if he gets out he will do exactly what he says he will do. He will kill Agent Ryan and her mother and until he does he will vent his rage on any innocent person he can get his hands on."
Sam walked directly to Garcia's office, ignoring the concern on the faces of her co-workers. Morgan stood up and took a step towards her but she just hurried her pace, determined to just put her head down and endure. She walked into Garcia's office and shut the door behind her.
"Sweetness, I heard, I'm sorry. What did the woman want? The nerve of some people, thinking they can walk in here and demand things. Well, let me tell you, she isn't going to mess with a member of this family and get away with it. A few clicks of my keyboard and I can make her wish she never existed! Why I can…"
Sam cut Gracia off. "Penelope, I need you to pull a case file for me. Commonwealth of Virginia vs. Travis Muscovy. The trial would have been in 1995. He was tried and convicted of child abuse and sexual assault of a minor among several other things. Pull everything Penelope. Pull every case note, every picture, every everything. And Garcia," she said with a voice that was beginning to break "I need you not to think any less of me when you see it and I need you to not to treat me any differently."
"Why would I treat you differently?" was the concerned question from Garcia. "Was it you? Did he hurt you?" Penelope asked as she reached out to grasp Sam's hand.
Sam held on like Penelope was a lifeline. "Pen, that man is the reason I am an expert on sex crimes. And now the team is going to find out just how damaged I really am. You have an hour to gather everything and then I have to go explain it to Hotch and Rossi."
Penelope didn't know how to respond. Tears were running down Sam's cheeks. The agent who seemed so strong and brash was cracking before her eyes. Pulling her into a hug Penelope whispered, "Just stay here, I'll get everything and then we'll go see Hotch. And cry. My guess is you put on a stiff upper lip and haven't ever taken the time to cry this out. Don't worry, you will always be our Agent Ryan and nothing that we read or see will ever change that. You're family now."
Sam started to sob. The only thing she could think about was that these people wouldn't want her around after they read what was in that file. Sucking in her breath and quieting her sobs she urged the technical analyst to begin to work. "Work your magic Pen, I've only got an hour."
Penelope's usually sunny demeanor continued to sober as the hour wore on. She dug up and copied case notes, court transcripts and pictures compiling it all into one file for the team. She bit her lip so hard it almost bled while pulling up the pictures of a young Sam taken in the hospital after the attack. She had never been good at seeing the horrors of crime scenes, but now, having the victim sit right next to her, having it be one of her BAU family was somehow worse. 'My poor, poor Sam! You went through so much pain.' was all she could think about. Finally, she had everything compiled. Wrapping an arm around Sam she pulled her up. "Let's go see the Bossman, he'll take it from there."
Sam never raised her eyes from the ground as they walked back to Hotch's office. Despite the rule of no inter-team profiling everyone knew something was terribly wrong. Their spitfire Sam seemed beaten down and shame was rolling off of her in waves. The team knew to be patient, that she would open up in her own time and that Penelope was probably the best person for her to be around right now, but that didn't take away the helpless feeling that was shared by the remaining agents.
*A.N. - Are you still with me? This chapter was one of the original ideas that I had for this story. Some of the strongest people I know are those that have gone through the most and who have survived. With enough support, encouragement, and love people can flourish again. ~ M.M.*