Summer holidays! YAY! Freedom!

And for those people up in the Northern Hemisphere, I live in Australia. We don't have white Christmases. We have bushfire-infested Christmases . Anyway. I'll probably have this story finished by the end of the holidays, and I can move on to a twilight parody!

We would have run, but after a five-second debate we decided against it. We were all in a pretty bad way, and we would have made about as much progress as a pack of wild snails. Besides, I was curious to find out who these people were.

After about ten minutes, we all agreed that we could definitely hear footsteps. The sun was slowly making its way towards the horizon, and I knew that we had about two hours before night fell.

"Why are they taking so long?" ViraTrixten demanded for the five billionth time. "If they're going to bother tracking us, they could at least do it with a bit of style."

"Stop moaning. I'd rather they took their time," Amandor said irritably.

"Mah-REE!" ViraTrixten moaned. That was her way of saying my name every time she wanted something from me.

"Yes, dear ViraTrixten?" I asked, heaping as much sugar as I could into a three-word sentence.

"Can't you just, like, make a magical boat out of salt water and get us AWAY from this place?" she whinged. I resisted the urge to strangle her. My mouth was opening and preparing for a witty retort when the ground suddenly started to rumble ominously.

"Here we go again," Amandor said heavily as he tried to find a handhold in the ground to cling to. I braced myself hastily, and beside me, ViraTrixten grabbed the side of the lifeboat.

The ground beneath shifted, and we were all pitched sideways. A loud clash filled the air, and the rock slid back to its original position.

"AAAAAAAAARGH!" ViraTrixten shrieked. I had fallen on top of her while the rocks had shifted, and now she was doubled over in apparent pain.

"ViraTrixten, I'm so-" my apology was cut off by another blood-curdling shriek.

"What's wrong?" Amandor demanded.

"MY HAIR!" ViraTrixten screamed, frantically feeling her head. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY HAIR?"

I sighed. In hindsight, we probably should have seen this coming. When I had barrelled into ViraTrixten, she must have bumped a hand against her head. From then on, it wouldn't be hard to figure out that a large chunk of her hair was now some kind of boy-cut.

"We may have... used it to start our fire?" Amandor said timidly, before I had a chance to stop him. The term if looks could kill couldn't have been more accurate as ViraTrixten bore down upon him. I half-expected flames to start dancing in her eyes.

"You CUT OFF MY HAIR SO THAT YOU COULD USE IT TO MAKE A FIRE!" she shrieked. Amandor and I shrank away from her as she neared hysterics.

"ViraTrixten, calm down! It doesn't look so bad!" I said, lying through my teeth, of course. In truth, she looked as though her hair had been run over by a lawn mower.

"THEN SHOW ME A BLOODY MIRROR!" ViraTrixten screamed. I instinctively reached for my compact, but then I thought the better of it. However, ViraTrixten zeroed in on my movement.

"That's a compact mirror," she snapped. "GIVE IT TO ME NOW!"

I cautiously handed it to her, and then clenched my eyes shut, bracing myself.

ViraTrixten would've started screaming. She would have thrown a fit, shrieking obscenities at us and threatening us with violent torture. But luckily- or unluckily, something interrupted her.

"Don't worry about it. If you ask me, it's an improvement."

ViraTrixten spun around. I scrambled to my feet, feeling around for a weapon as I registered the heavily cloaked people before me.

I couldn't see their faces, but somehow I knew for certain that these were the same people who had chased us through the Labyrinth. One of them stepped forward, dragging with them a figure with black clothes and awful hair...

"Ebony!" I cried. She looked up, and I met her eyes.

Ebony looked terrible. She had apparently been attempting to put on make-up without a mirror; her black lipstick was smeared across her left cheek in a huge splodge, her mascara was doubling as a lumpy, black eye shadow, and her eyeliner... I wasn't even going to describe it.

"Mary1" she cried. I resisted the urge to facepalm. Leave it to Enoby to ruin any tearful reunions with her illiteracy.

"You're alive!" Amandor said. It was hard to tell whether he was happy or disappointed.

"Unfortunately," one of the cloaked people muttered. I glared at the one holding Ebony, assuming she was the leader.

"What do you want with Ebony?" I demanded. "Let her go!"

"No."

Wow. These guys really knew how to get the message across. I actually didn't have an answer. Thankfully, ViraTrixten had some kind of autopilot function that kicked in whenever somebody said the word 'no'. She hated being refused anything.

"What do you mean, no?" she snarled.

"No, as in we won't let her go," the hooded figure said calmly. I was able to identify her as female by her voice, but apart from that she was a complete stranger to me. However, I didn't have time to focus on her, because ViraTrixten was swelling up as though she were about to explode.

"Okay, look here, little miss I'm-so-hideously-deformed-that-I-need-to-wear-an-ugly-robe-to-cover-up-my-fat-and-ugly-face," she growled, advancing upon the girl. "I am SICK of this Quest. My cruise ship has been CRUSHED. My designer clothes are ruined, I have NO makeup, I have only got ONE BLOODY COMPACT MIRROR TO LOOK AT MYSELF IN, AND MY HAIR HAS BEEN CUT OFF! I'M TIRED, I'M HUNGRY, AND I'M BORED! THE LAST THING I NEED RIGHT NOW IS SOME UGLY LITTLE FREAK SAYING NO TO ME! GIVE ME WHAT I WANT AND GIVE IT TO ME NOW!" she screamed. I slowly backed away from her. She looked deranged as she bore down upon the cloaked girl. Even the creepy evil villains were looking worried as they glanced uneasily at each other.

"You really should work on your temper," one of the hooded figures said. I performed a quick head count. There were six of them facing us, but I wouldn't be surprised if there were more hidden away. I knew from our quick previous encounter that these guys were good with strategy.

"I know that you may not hold the greatest impression of us," another one said, "but we need your help."

There was a second of silence.

"I'm sorry- you need our help?" Amandor asked. I frowned. His voice had a small quaver in it. Then I remembered- Amandor had seen the face of one of these people. When we had been in the Labyrinth, he'd come close enough to see underneath their hoods. I had never gotten the chance to ask him exactly what he'd seen.

"It's rather uncomfortable, but yes." The girl at the front sighed as though she was reluctant to continue. "I'm proposing a truce. I'll explain the situation, and then perhaps you'll help us."

ViraTrixten opened her mouth to refuse, and Amandor was right behind her. Neither of them wanted anything to do with these people. But I wanted to. I wanted answers.

"Okay," I said, ignoring the glares of Amandor and ViraTrixten. It was entirely possible that this was some kind of elaborate trap, but somehow I doubted it. Without a glance back, the cloaked figures turned and walked away from us, dragging Ebony with them. I hurried after them, and after a moment's hesitation, Amandor and ViraTrixten followed.

One nice thing about these evil guys was that they had a really cool campsite. Sure, the black tents were a little ominous, but they had a strong fire and lots of food. I was so busy stuffing my face that I barely had time to feel sorry for Ebony, who had been shoved into a cage made from silver.

"So," the cloaked girl said, striding forward. Amandor, ViraTrixten and I were all sitting around the campfire. The girl sat across from us, her hood throwing her face into a shadow.

"You have to understand who we are and what we do before I can explain everything to you." She paused for a moment before continuing. "We are Slayers."

There was a brief second of silence, and then ViraTrixten broke it with a trademark rude comment.

"What the hell are Slayers? What do you slay?"

"Vampires," the girl said coldly. "We are vampire slayers."

"So Ebony..." I said quietly, but she cut across me.

"I'll get to that. I'm sure you all know about the imbalance in the world. Strange people have been popping up everywhere- for example, Lord Voldemort appeared in the middle of a camp for half-gods. We are essentially in the same position as him- we belong to another world. But somehow, the worlds are all merging together. That is something we have to deal with. We are in another world, and we have managed to accept that."

"So, what do you want with Ebony?" I asked.

"Information. We all have one destiny- one purpose. We need to slay vampires, no matter where they are."

"So... you guys aren't interested in getting home? You just want to kill vampires?" I asked.

"Yes. However... we aren't entirely sure what vampires are in this world. When we suddenly found ourselves in your camp, we discovered that there are some sparkly creatures called vampires who aren't affected by stakes, holy water, crosses, garlic or sunlight. They didn't even have fangs. I'll admit, it was a huge disappointment. But then we heard a prophecy, in which a 'goff who is a vamp' was mentioned. We decided to go for it."

"You heard the prophecy, and decided you'd use it to discover if there are any vampires worth fighting in this world," Amandor guessed.

"That's right. We followed the four of you, watched as you destroyed that man's home and made your way to New York. We didn't know which one of you was the vampire... so we captured all of you. We intended to interrogate all of you in turn until we found the vampire, but by some stroke of ironic luck Ebony was the first person we interrogated. We discovered that she was... sort of a vampire."

"So why did you capture her again?" ViraTrixten asked.

"We needed information on the vampires of this world. What can kill them, what they're attracted to... things like that. Unfortunately, we ran into a few... problems."

I thought over the endless conversations I'd had with Ebony- the impossible spelling mistakes, the awful grammar... and the punctuation. No wonder they'd had problems.

"According to Ebony, there are only two things that can kill a vampire in this world. A steak through the heart is one of them, and the other she spelled out for us, because she didn't want to say it."

"A cross?" I asked.

"That's right. We still don't know how on earth we're supposed to drive a steak through anyone's heart- and should it be raw or cooked?"

I was stunned into silence. These weren't bad guys at all! They were just a little bit creepy. And all they wanted was information!

"We'll make you a deal!" I said eagerly. "You let Ebony go, and we'll tell you all you need to know about the vampires in this world."

The girl hesitated, glancing between me and Ebony.

"Come on," I insisted. "Does she really look dangerous to you? I know she acts like she's capable of violence, but she doesn't even know how to load a gun."

The slayer sighed, and nodded slowly.

"Fine."

"Wait a second," ViraTrixten snapped. "I still have some questions. How come Queen Hera knows about you, huh? Why doesn't she think we should trust you? And how did you lot end up on a clashing rock with us?"

"Those questions are easy," the girl said tonelessly. "Queen Hera knows about us because, for the short time we were at your camp, we used her cabin as a refuge. No-one noticed us. No-one ever goes in there."

"And... she doesn't think you should be trusted because you slept in her cabin?" Amandor asked.

"That probably is a factor. And as for the clashing rocks..." she smiled. "We were on the ship with you the whole time. You just didn't notice us when you were conducting your little search."

"What? Where were-"

"Enough questions," the girl snapped. "You owe me information. I suggest you start talking."