It had been a few weeks since the incident with Cristina happened. Everyone around the hospital had heard about it, but Meredith shrugged it off with an eyeroll. She was 37 and far beyond the drama of her younger years. What's done was done, Cristina had proven that she was unable to change her ways and had only shown up in Seattle to cause drama between the two former best friends. Meredith had simply moved on, becoming more immersed in her job and her family, and the life she had made for herself in Seattle. She had come here over ten years ago, scared and new, and she was proud of herself for the giant hurdles she had overcome to get to the place she was in now.

All day long at work, she'd felt a constantly cramping in her pelvic region, and she'd simply figured she was getting her period. She took a few asprin and kept on working through the cramps. It took her a few hours to realize that her period was late. A month late, to be exact. She had been so stressed with the attack and then Cristina to realize that she had been late. Her eyes widening with horror, she slipped away quietly to grab a pregnancy test from a supply closet, grabbing a few and tucking them into her scrub pockets. For the next few hours, she was called into emergency surgery with Amelia, the two of them working on an aneurism that they were both sure was about to blow. She completely forgot about the increasing pain in her abdomen until she was scrubbing out of the surgery.

All at one the pain overtook her and she doubled over, crouched on the floor of the scrub room. Amelia came in, having finished the surgery, and looked at her with concern.

"Are you okay?" she asked her, kneeling down beside her. Meredith felt like she was going to vomit or pass out, and she begged herself for one or the other to happen.

"I don't know," she admitted. "I kind of have to pee," she lied, forcing herself off the floor and pushing her way out of the scrub room. The nearest public bathroom was right down the hall, but she needed a private bathroom. Derek's office had one, and so did Amelia's, but also so did hers. She headed towards the closest, which was Derek's, and barricaded the door, quickly sitting down on the toilet. The pain had only gotten worse; it was now tearing through her abdomen, and she quickly pulled down her scrub pants and her panties, fearing the worst.

Of course she found the worst.

Derek had been in the other OR doing a crainiotomy, and bumped into Amelia on both of their way out. Amelia looked up at him with concern on her face.

"Der, I was just in there with Meredith and she looked worse for wear. I think she was in pain but she wouldn't admit anything. She mentioned having to pee, but I have no idea where she went. She just…something was off," she said, biting on her lip, pulling her scrubcap off her head. Derek's face was full of concern. What could be wrong? Meredith had been to hell and back in the past year, first with him, then with herself, and then with Zola falling and breaking her arm. She didn't need anymore tragedies to marr her life. Sighing, he grabbed his cell phone and sent her a text.

Meredith felt her phone go off but she was numb. She had laid down on the bathroom floor, staring at the wall, not wanting to move for fear that she'd start crying. She was in so much pain, and there was so much blood. She didn't remember there being so much blood the first time. Suddenly there was a knock on the door, and the jingling of keys; Derek could get in with his keys. The door opened up and she looked up slightly, not feeling well enough to fully move much.

"Mere what's wrong? Tell me," he said, kneeling down beside her. She took a deep breath, not wanting to talk, but she bit on her lip and whimpered.

"It hurts," she cried out, hugging her knees to her chest. All at once he looked down at her, at the sticky stain between her legs, and his mouth dropped open. He didn't have time to grieve, not now.

"Mere, come on, let's get you up to OB," he said quickly, scooping up his wife in his arms and holding him close, moving quickly through the hospital to the OB floor. Once they were there he stood at the desk with Meredith in his arms, her eyes closed as she leaned into his chest.

"I think my wife is having a miscarriage," he said softly to the receptionist. When asked her name he bit his lip and looked down at her exhasusted form, knowing she was in pain. "Dr. Meredith Shepherd," he said, and quickly they were ushered into an exam room and Dr. Ryan was paged. Derek laid her down on the exam table and she opened her eyes a bit, tears spilled out as she pulled at his scrubs and labcoat.

"Der…," she whimpered. Her abdomen was rolling, tied up in knots, waves of pain coming over her. She would feel the stickiness of blood between her legs and she wanted all of it to be over. She hadn't known she was pregnant and here it was, gone before she had even known about it.

"I know Mer, I know," he whispered softly, smoothing her hair back and kissing her forehead. It had all happened so fast; he had only seen her hours before, perky and happy as they parted ways from the carpool this morning, leaving the kids at daycare, and now she was on the OBGYN exam table in searing pain.

It seemed like forever before Connie was rushing into the room, a frown on her face.

"Meredith, I hear we might have a miscarriage on our hands again." Meredith simply replied by bursting into gut-wrenching sobs, curling up into Derek who had managed to climb onto the table with her. Connie bit her lip and watched the woman who had gone to hell and back with two pregnancies and almost losing her husband.

"Meredith..Dr. Shepherd…I need you to remove everything from the waist down so I can get a look," Connie said, knowing how painful this always was for people. Knowing Meredith wouldn't be able to do it from the pain, both physical and mental, Derek got up and took off her shoes, then took off her scrub pants, tossing them in the dirty laundry, then slipped off her stained underwear, before helping move her legs into position. Her sobs had went back to silent crying as Connie performed an exam, her face looking grim as she turned to the pair.

"Well, it looks as if you were about 7 weeks Meredith, it's common for women to not know they're pregnant and to miscarry," she said slowly. Meredith's eyes were shut tight, she wanted the nightmare to end. This was her second miscarriage; it had been years since her first, but it was still her second one, and she had two children she'd given birth to. She knew it was probably the stress from the attack, but it saddened her deeply.

"Just admit me into the hospital and perform the D+C. I'm in so much pain I'm going to throw up. I want to be under anesthesia," she admitted. Connie nodded and left the room, making preparations for the minor procedure. Derek slumped into a chair that he'd pulled to her side, gripping her hands.

"Meredith, we'll get through this," he whispered, as Meredith turned her head towards him, tears staining her cheeks.

"I love you Derek. I'm sorry this happened….again. I know It's not my fault but I'm still sorry. Maybe it's whoevers up there's way of telling us to slow down, that we aren't ready for another one. I mean hell, I didn't know I was pregnant. But it still hurts. Physically and emotionally," she said, turning towards him, making sure the paper was still covering her from the waist down. She hated she was going to be in the hospital again but knowing it was for the best. Amelia and Owen could babysit the kids and Derek could stay with her.

Within a few hours Meredith and in and out of the OR, her uterus scraped clean of the fetus and placenta, and she was resting in a private hospital room, Derek dozing in the reclining chair beside her. She had had morphine for the pain not too long ago and felt woozy, when there was a knock on the door and Amelia slipped in, her face grim.

"Hey," she said softly, taking in the scene of her brother and sister-in-law. Meredith pushed herself up, wincing.

"Hey," she said hoarsely, rubbing at her eyes. "Does the whole hospital know?" she asked, knowing how gossip worked. Amelia shook her head.

"No, just me and Owen. And Bailey and Webber, and Catherine, but that's it. Owen brought the kids home because I just got out of surgery but he texted me and said they're asleep, I just wanted to check in and make sure you were okay before I left." Meredith looked down at her hands before looking up.

"It feels different than the first time. I feel like I shouldn't be upset over something I didn't know I had, right? But…it hurts. It hurts so much. Because there was something, and then suddenly it was gone," she said, her eyes filling with tears. She felt ridiculous crying in front of Amelia, who had carried a baby to term, a baby who had no brain, a baby who had lived for a few minutes and died in her arms. Amelia softened, and offered a small smile.

"It's crazy how these things effect you, how you don't expect them to affect you but they do. And it's always going to be there in the back of your mind, haunting you, but it haunts you less and less every day," she said, walking over to Meredith and giving her a tight hug. "I love you, Meredith, never forget that. Get some sleep and I'll bring the kids by in the morning," she said with a smile, before nodding to Derek. "Let him take care of you as long as he wants. Let him hover. He deserves to hover," she giggled, before she slipped out of the room.

Hastily, Meredith shook Derek awake. She didn't want to sleep alone tonight. Once he was awake he slipped under the covers of the tiny hospital bed with her, the two of them falling asleep in their shared pain.

I wasn't going to write a Meredith miscarriage plot, but it kind of wrote itself into the story all by itself. Don't hate me! I plan on her having two more kids still, but all in good time, and I felt it was a good plot to have her have a miscarriage and then maybe find out she's pregnant at Christmas? Anyway. Read and review please!