Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo, meaning it does not belong to me. I am in no way, shape, and/or form claiming to be the owner/creator of these concepts, though I do claim any characters not apart of the original Bleach storyline (such as Anzu) mine. As such, I would appreciate fellow authors and readers to give credit where credit is due and not steal any of my characters and/or concepts. Thank you, and have a pleasant day.

"Anzu, I have a special mission for you."

I looked up from midmorning tea as Sousuke stirred the tiniest pinch of sugar into his cup, "What do you need me to do?"

"Agreeing so easily?" Sousuke smirked slightly, "Don't you even want to hear it?"

I blinked, "…You mean I have a chance to back out?"

"Yes." Sousuke nodded, "You do."

"…" I shifted, taking another sip of my tea.

The only thing that was going in Las Noches lately was the invasion, so if Sousuke wanted me to do a 'special mission' it would more than likely have to deal with that or the winter war…

I could see why he was giving me the option to back out; things that touched close to my past seemed to set me off, and with me being so weak lately I might not want to deal with the emotional strain.

I might not he able to handle the emotional strain.

"What is the mission outline?" I asked softly after a moment, fiddling with my cup.

"You are to go to the human world," Sousuke began carefully, gently, "And sway the vizards into participating in the winter war."

I blinked, barely managing to prevent myself from reacting to a sharp pang in my chest. "You want me… to go talk to the vizards?"

"Not talk." Sousuke shook his head, "'Talk' implies that I am sending you as a messenger. What I need you to do isn't so forthright… I need you to convince them. To plead for their help, all without letting on that participating in the war is exactly what I want them to do."

I stared at him for a moment, then slowly said, "You need me to act both as bait and as the red herring…"

"Very good, Anzu." Sousuke smiled, taking another sip of his tea.

I swallowed hard and stared down at my teacup, watching the dark liquid inside ripple. This was big… Really big… I didn't know if I could do it…

But… Sousuke wouldn't ask if he didn't think I could… right?

"Sousuke…?" When he looked at me, I slouched slightly and curled in on myself as a sort of protective move, "Do you… really think I can do this?"

"Anzu…" Sousuke was beside me a moment later, gently taking my cup and setting it down on the coffee table before taking my shoulders and easing me up and into his arms.

I looked up into his eyes. As always, everything about his face screamed of things soft and welcoming… Save two areas. His smile was one of them.

No matter how gentle that smile seemed, it always held a condescending air and a sharp, threatening edge.

…But even his smile wasn't nearly as bad as his eyes.

While they seemed gentle from a distance, when you were up close you could clearly see what was flickering in their depths; sharpness, calculation, desire (though not of the flesh), and judgment… as if he were weighing out your usefulness. As if there was always some master game of chess going on in his head, and he was trying to decide if you were still a valuable piece.

And, then, finality, as his eyes were showing now.

Finality that only came when he decided just where on the board to move your piece, the piece of a pawn.

"Of course I think you can." Sousuke said with a gentle smile, cupping my jaw and tilting my head up, "I believe in you…"

A cold trickle ran down my spine as he sealed his lips over mine, my body heavy in his arms with dread.

It had taken him a moment to decide if I was still useful… It usually never took him that long.

Though part of me desperately wished to believe that Sousuke would never hurt me, another part instilled doubt.

It insisted that my piece, the pawn, only had so many moves left on the board before Sousuke would gladly sacrifice it to get to the other player's king.

'The white king will sacrifice you soon, pawn…' Something in my mind said, 'And then your pretty, pristine white exterior will topple to the side and become stained with red.'

I closed my eyes and leaned into Sousuke, clinging to him desperately.

I wanted to believe I was more than a pawn.

I wanted to believe that I was a queen; no one wants to sacrifice the queen…

But as the little voice continued to instill doubt, my hazy world cleared at the edges and I realized something.

As Sousuke picked me up and took me to his bed it struck me…

I'm a bit too small to be a queen.

"GET BACK HERE, BITCH!" An angry voice roared from behind me.

I ran faster, my heart pounding in my ears and my breath coming out in short, hot, panicked bursts. I ignored the stabbing pain in my chest, grinding me teeth and fighting tears.

As I fled from the sidewalk and into the forest, I tripped over a root, my hakama tearing from my ankle up to my calf and the sleeves of my jacket and coat rubbing my arms raw as I flung them forward to protect my face.

Hearing footsteps behind me, I scrambled back to my feet and started running again.

"Fuck!! Where in the hell is that skank?!"

"This way, dipshit! Into the forest!"

"Will you two fuckin' quit arguin'?! We've gotta get her before Lord Aizen finds out she escaped!"

I swallowed hard and ran faster, trying my best to ignore the sounds of sonido around me. When they closed in, though, I took a sharp turn and started running downhill, letting the downward incline to speed me up.

Their footsteps fell behind…

And then the ground evened out and I burst out of the tree line, running straight for what seemed to be an area full of old storage facilities. There was a flash of orange to my right as I ran right into them, but I ignored it.

The sounds of sonido and the feel of my pursuers' reiatsus were closing in.

There were shouts from behind me, none of them belonging to my three attackers, but I ignored them as I felt a cero charge behind me.

In this small area there was no way I could dodge it, so I ground my teeth and buried my heel into the ground, spinning around and holding my hands out in front of me.

As the red beam of light shot straight for me, blue flashed and my barrier formed, only instead of being beneath my feet the formation of circles flashed to life before my hands, quite literally like an old-fashioned shield.

I focused my energy on changing the nature of the shield, and it did change. Fast.

Instead of the inner and outer rings spinning either clockwise or counterclockwise in conjunction, the outer span clockwise and the inner span counterclockwise, and they were going too fast for me to be able to tell what the smaller circles were doing.

It took seconds for the cero to get closer and closer, just as it took seconds for my shield to properly take the form it needed, and when the cero finally met the large blue plate the reaction was instantaneous.

The cero bounced right back.

There was a scream as the cero, presumably, tore through the one who had fired it, making a large explosion and a huge plume of dust.

Two forms burst through the upper section of the plume, both male, and both with their zanpakuto drawn.

It was too late to run, so I crouched and spread my feet, holding out my hands in a battle stance and letting the nature of my barrier change again and reform around my feet in the form it used to block physical attacks.

The both raised their blades.

After what they'd seen, neither of them would be stupid enough to attempt energy attacks.

I crouched down as they started to scream.

"EVANESCE, VAPORIZACION!"

"CRUSH, CANTO RODADO!"

I ground my teeth, waiting as the two still growing forms descended on me—

"Blow it away, Tachikaze!"

"Play, Kinshara!"

One of the Arrancar was taken out by a burst of bright blue, energy-like wind, and the other was impaled through the chest by a tipped whip that jerked him back and slammed him down into the ground, making his body explode.

I stayed in my stance, waiting, panting, still trying to ignore the stabbing pain in my chest.

The ground in front of me was soaked red, my barrier was still in full swing, at the dust was still clearing. Even as it did, several figures appeared in the brown air, walking towards me slowly.

I tensed, forcing myself to control my breathing and getting ready to throw up another barrier.

As soon as the first figure emerged from the dust cloud, though, I let my barrier flicker and die, my stance relaxing.

"Sh… Shinji…"

Shinji stared at me, his eyes wide, "Anzu…"

A short, bitter laugh burst from my lips and I smiled as the tears finally spilled over, and I tried to walk over to him. No longer able to ignore the pain in my chest, though, I let out a strangled gasp and pitched forward, falling.

Before I slammed into the ground a pair of arms wrapped around me and cradled me to a chest, and I looked up into Shinji's worried eyes and smiled.

"Hey…"

"Anzu…" He mumbled, his eyes flickering across my body before settling on the wound in my chest, which seemed to throb even as he looked at it, "…Hold on, okay?" His arms around me tightened their hold slightly, "Just… hold on…"

"I'll try…" I mumbled as my vision flickered and my eyes started to slip closed, "I'll… try…"

Shinji shouted something and I passed out.

Dim… dim… dim lighting…

Laying on my back on something dusty, something dilapidated, something old and musty…

But I knew it, and that was a comfort.

Voices… voices flickering in and out of focus around me…

"How do we know… —uence of Kyoka Suige—"

"…—achi?"

"Unfortunately, I can't answer tha—…—zen's spiritual pressure is all around—… Much like a second skin. I can't tell where she ends and he begins."

"—uck. They must have been living real close for a long time… What do you suppo—"

"Hey!" A forceful voice cut through all of the murmurs, making it so even I heard it in my delirium. "Quick question! Why the fuck do you all care about her health?! The bitch betrayed us! I say we kick her out!"

"Hiyori, shut the fuck up. Anzu ain't goin' anywhere."

"Hey, jackass, just because you can't keep yer hormones in check around a fucking human doesn't mean you get to put the rest of us in danger for your own stupid gain!"

"Please, calm down. She's waking up…"

I opened my eyes not long after this was said and found myself staring at a familiar rusty, sheet metal ceiling, some areas eroded away to reveal the sky above.

Some movement to my right made me look, and I smiled slightly when I saw him, "Shinji…"

Shinji smiled back, not his usual shit-eating grin but something softer, something strained, and something even a little weary. Still, there was no hesitance in his movements when he reached out and helped me sit up.

Once I was sitting and had my legs over the side of the couch and on the ground, I looked around, still a little disbelieving. Everything seemed so clear… No fuzziness at the edges. No confusing, convincing rationalizations tricking me into doing anything I wouldn't normally do…

For the first time in a long time I was me, and I was home.

A cold, hollow feeling took over my body and my eyes started to burn as I looked around at everyone. Everyone who was staring at me, even the most placid of them showing some level of mistrust.

"I-Is this real?" I rasped, looking around and barely daring to believe. "A-Am I finally out of Las Noches?"

"Yeah, Anzu…" Shinji said softly, "You're out…"

I shocked even myself when I started giggling. In seconds I was laughing, my arms crossed tightly over my stomach and my body bent forward over my knees. I was still wearing the Las Noches uniform, but even that didn't matter anymore.

I was out…

I WAS FUCKING OUT!!

Without me even realizing it until I felt a tear dropping onto my hand, I had stopped laughing and was reduced to body-wracking sobs, a loud scream rising up in the back of my throat.

FUCK AIZEN'S PLAN!

FUCK THAT SON OF A BITCH!

I was NEVER going back with him!

And then I was screaming, pain ripping through my throat and my lungs burning. I grabbed my head and dug my fingernails into my scalp, relishing the feel of pain that told me I was alive.

My eyes and mind were clear, and I had finally stopped calling that son of a bitch by his first name.

I was free.

I was out.

I struggled when my hands were torn away from my head, and when they were pinned back against the sofa and I was pressed back into the cushions I flailed, no longer wailing in despair but screaming in anger. A knee settled between my legs and a body pressed against mine, pinning me to the sofa and holding me completely still.

Images of what Aizen had done to me… No, what I had let him do to me started flooding back, and I fought.

"—zu!" Someone was barking into my ear, "Anzu! Calm down!"

"Get off of me!" I screamed, flailing harder, "Don't touch me! Don't you dare touch me! NOT AGAIN, GODDAMN IT!"

The person who had been holding me down jumped back immediately.

When I saw it had been Shinji, I blinked, staring at him in confusion. I'd been so wrapped up in the fact that I was out that I'd forgotten where I was and even who I was with.

"Sh-Shinji…?!" I rasped, my breathing speeding up.

"…Anzu…" Shinji began carefully after a moment, kneeling in front of me and meeting my eyes evenly, "Did Aizen… do anythin'… inappropriate to ya?"

I stared at Shinji for a moment. "N… No…" My voice broke and tears welled up again, "I… I let him… He… He… and I… I…" I buried my face into my hands and burst into tears, another scream building up.

Shinji was sitting by me in a second, his arms wrapped around me tightly to prevent me from flying off of the handle and doing something stupid.

"Anzu, it's not yer fault." He said firmly and loudly over my sobs, "Aizen used his zanpakuto on you. Ya didn't know what you were doin'."

"Th-That doesn't change th-the f-fact that I… we…" I curled in on myself, hugging my knees to my chest and sobbing into them.

Shinji sighed, muttered something to the others, then picked me up and started carrying me.

I had to fight the urge to lash out at him, to convince myself that he wasn't an enemy.

I… I felt so confused… Like my eyes had suddenly been opened and I didn't recognize the world around me.

Images and habits that had been forced into me during my time in Las Noches kept flashing back, and it was hard for me to tell if I was there or back in the warehouse.

The feel of the arms around me kept changing, and I couldn't tell if I was being held by Aizen or Shinji…

And then I was in darkness, surrounded by a familiar scent.

Sharp, musky and thick… Minty… like aftershave…

Cool above and warm below… And a warm body next to mine, an arm wrapped around my waist…

"Feelin' calmer now, Anzu?" Shinji mumbled into my ear.

"Shinji…" I rasped, tearing at the pain in my throat, "I… I'm sorry… Dear god, I am so sorry… I—" When I was kissed, I flinched, trying to draw back.

Shinji kept a gentle but firm grip on my waist, though, and held me in place, and slowly I started to respond, thoughts of Aizen completely leaving my mind. I wasn't with Aizen anymore. I was with Shinji now… I was me again…

Shinji pulled back a moment later and I buried my face against his chest, crying silently until I was asleep.

When Shinji walked out of his room about an hour later, the others were still waiting for him.

He stared at Hiyori evenly when she glared at him, "I believe her."

Hiyori snorted, looking away, "Course ya do, dickhead…"

"…That son of a bitch is gonna pay for this." Shinji growled after a moment.

Hiyori tensed, "Course he is."

Shinji sighed heavily and plopped down, his forehead falling into his hands. "…You guys remember how this all started?" He mumbled after a moment.

"I'd say it was about the time Rose was promoted…" Love threw the blonde a smirk, "You're bad luck, man."

"Shut up." Rose snorted, then thought and sighed, "I'd say it was closer to the time Kisuke became captain of twelfth." Ignoring how some of the others unconsciously flinched, he leaned forward on the sofa and braced his elbows on his legs, sighing again, "Yeah, I'd say that's where it really started…"

They couldn't help it.

The eight former captains and lieutenants started to reminisce.

"Was lettin' Anzu go back like that a good idea? She's been breakin' outta yer control for a while… Now she's completely awake. She won't come back willin'ly."

"I am perfectly aware of that, Gin. Did you honestly think her breaking free of my control was an accident?"

"…Hehe, Sousuke, yer one sick bastard."

"Why, thank you. Now, please prepare the retrieval party. I believe we can allow Anzu one evening in the bed of the man she loves before we tear it all away again… Don't you agree, Mika?"

"…"

"Aahh, parting is such sweet sorrow…"