JP: This is set post-SOJ after Nick's latest courtroom triumph as he pitted his life and wits against Her Malevolence. Now he's trying to convince his former Wright & Co. Office Manager to say yes to the coaxing of "Come Be My Girl" (my alternate song title of choice for this parody) in this new, non-corrupt Japalifornia legal system he's helped set up. Except for this time, he wants Maya back - as more than just his assistant …
This one's going out to requesters and awesome readers, MuhammadGamingS and PurpleHoodedAngel ... and every fellow Phaya lover out there! :)
CT: If you've read any of my co-writer's material, you probably knew that it was only a matter of time before we'd be posting a Phaya parody. Though like with all of her other Phaya stories, JP does a wonderful job in showing us just why Phoenix and Maya are Special Someones and have been aggressively shipped by Pearl since 2002.
"A Whole New Law"
(Sung to the tune of "A Whole New World"
from Walt Disney's Aladdin)
[Intro: Phoenix and Maya]
Maya: Argh! I was losing my mind today, with nothing to do but hope and pray! *puffs out cheeks* However did you do that?!
Phoenix: Do what?
Maya: How'd you manage to pull that log out of the fire?!
Phoenix: *smirks* It's my own brand of courtroom magic!
Maya: I - I'd gotten so used to seeing you defend – but at your side in court, where I could actually help you out! – Instead of so far away in the gallery! I felt so helpless!
Phoenix: You wouldn't...you wouldn't ever consider coming back as my legal assistant again, would you? We could create some serious waves, post-Dark Age of the Law!
Maya: So the system is now … corruption free?
Phoenix: You bet! Do you believe in me?
Maya: What?
Phoenix: Do you believe in me?
Maya: Yes...
[Verse 1: Phoenix]
I'll make justice unfurl
Flawed jurisdictions mended
Tell me, Master, when was the law
Last upon your side?
[Verse 2: Phoenix]
Little room for surprise
Same old courtroom inflections
Hold it's, Take That's, Objections
Cuz the truth can't be denied
[Refrain 1: Phoenix]
A whole new law
Vanquished the darkness you once knew
No further jails to know
More highs than lows
Nor frightened tears or screaming
[Refrain 2: Maya and Phoenix]
A whole new law
Fresh turnabouts begin anew
With you I'll have no fear
It's crystal clear
That I'm meant for a whole new law with you
(I'm meant for a whole new law with you)
[Verse 2: Maya]
Unbelievable bluffs
Magatamas be glowing
Smiling faces be showing
That we're on our client's side!
[Refrain 3: Maya and Phoenix]
A whole new law
(Don't you dare change your mind)
At Wright Anything Agency
(With you back; it'll be better)
Our trials are so bizarre
We raise the bar!
My heart says this is where I need to be
[Refrain 4: Phoenix and Maya]
A whole new law
(The DA's aren't bad guys)
New crimes and cases to pursue
(We're truth-seeking go-getters)
We'll be the justice pair
Make trials be fair
Let me share this whole new law with you
[Refrain 5: Phoenix and Maya]
A whole new law
(I'll be your squaw)
Together we'll be
(We're meant to be)
Eternal bliss
(Give me a kiss)
Forever thee
[Whispers] Maya: Goodnight, my Baron of Bluffing
[*Phaya kiss*]
Dual (because you know, we're a duet!) shout out of thanks and replies to the following awesomesauce readers/reviewers including PM's! Everyone else…thanks so much for reading!
IamMelapples
CT: When it comes to songs, if we can make decent parodies, we don't really care where they come from. So with that in mind, we're willing to give those songs a look and see what we can do with them.
JP: If you are a fan of my fave funny man's works you would know that he has a particular affinity for writing Manfred and his very unique penchant for Santa Claus and all things Christmas so this is actually a little bit less out there a request than one might think!
P.S. don't think we have heard a review from you until now so thank you very much for reading and dropping a line! :)
chloemcg
CT: In regards to "My Lullaby", I think that song is more befitting for the likes of Morgan or Ga'ran since it involves raising a child in order to strike down a hated enemy. But when I think about it, none of the characters in the series feel quite right when paired with that song. However, that's not to say that I don't plan on parodying it in the future…
JP: I need to look up, as I don't know "My Lullaby" but it sounds like it'd be sung to Satan Spawn Dahlia as a child…and as, for the creepsicle dildo that is Bitchtoff, the only person I could ever ship him with is Dolly herself... They are both poisonously evil! Hail Dahlstoph!
As for there being a Gavin sister, it has come up in a couple of Fanfictions so the idea really isn't too outrageous at least not compared to some of the stuff that's out there!
TheFreelancerSeal
CT: Don't worry about it. We're always up for a challenge. As for why villains tend to get better songs than heroes, I feel that their position allows for them to be written in an over-the-top, larger-than-life manner. For in order for a villain's defeat to be truly satisfying, their character had to be built up to make them appear formidable. So this is often done in a wide variety of ways- whether in the form of having the villain plot in the shadows and/or constantly throwing obstacles at the protagonist, having them destroy everything and/or everything that the protagonist loves, and/or giving them a musical number that allows them to strut their evil stuff.
JP: Well you presented a challenge to my co-pilot and I'm happy that he delivered...an evil Yank it doth not make...but certainly makes you one hell of a reader! :p
JusticeforNoOne
CT: I agree with you that the combination of those snazzy instruments and Tim Curry's wonderfully evil voice is what makes that song so great.
You can take Franziska out of the 'perfect' world of the von Karma family, but you can't take the von Karma out of her. For Franziska, arrogance, as well as the desire to verbally and physically abuse anyone who dares to stand in her way, is as hardwired into her genes as the ability to swim is in a fish's.
I don't know about you, but if JP writes a prequel for "Double DILF Doodles", I'd want to see a story going into detail describing everything that transpired on that trip to Vegas that the guys took for Edgeworth's 40th birthday which included Phoenix's encounter with a drag queen stripper and Edgeworth having an emotional breakdown during his karaoke performance of "Copacabana".
JP: Tim Curry is incredible both as a musical performer and as an actor and I was giggling maniacally at Franny's overuse of the so-called f-word now having a different meaning... While she has undergone fantastic character development I will agree with you a hundred percent that she will never lose the Von Karma arrogance but then again being beautiful and brilliant enough to be a prosecutor at the age of 13 it's certainly more cause for self-confidence than a lot of other characters we've seen (cough *Red White/Richard Wellington*) both in this game and real life!
Also, I absolutely love the headcanon about Detective Badd and I want to find some way at least give the very much loved Raymond Shields and honorable mention that he did defend my favorite detective badass and keep him out of prison in my story. (I can't believe you're already up to chapter 165 it seems like just a few weeks ago you were still in double-digit chapters I know it's a lengthy read so your dedication to this dear project a mind means a lot to me!) It's very hard to give all these wonderful characters enough "on-screen" time, what with so many characters in the mix, but I have at least managed to marry him off happily to his in-game crush Katherine Hall! Thanks for that idea thanks for that idea! :)
P.S. Double DILF Doodies prologue/epilogue will probably have a scene with the men very similar to the one you mentioned in your last review…and am now wracking brain trying to think of a worthy hilarious tale of the boys' Vegas antics like CT mentioned! XD
MuhammadGamingS
CT: In regards to Regina, while I find her irritating, I don't outright hate her for it. I think that it has to do with the fact that in both "Justice for All" and "Investigations 2", she's the lesser of two evils when compared to games' respective clowns, whether in terms of irritation for the former or having any real presence period in the latter. Sure, Regina may make Sebastian before the events of "The Grand Turnabout" look like a Nobel laureate by comparison, but considering where she was raised, and that Moe played a big part in her upbringing, she turned out alright… aside from almost marrying a puppet, that is.
Considering how the anime's been turning Phoenix into an Airbender with all of the windstorms his objections have been creating, I wouldn't be surprised to see a tidal wave of coffee sloshing out of his mug. Though for me, I'm more excited to see what they have planned for "Recipe for Turnabout" in regards to Armstrong and Tigre. For the former, my life will be complete if they give him a more flamboyant version of Maximillion Pegasus' voice (if that's even possible), and for Tigre… Well, if he's capable of causing a power outage with his roar in the game, then I can only imagine what the anime has in store for his breakdown.
While I have no objections about Edgeworth and Franziska's relationship becoming romantic, I personally can't see it being anything more than 'little' brother/'big' sister. Sure, if Edgeworth and Franziska met at around the same time as Phoenix and Maya, I could see them getting together. However Edgeworth and Franziska met when they were nine and two, respectively; and in my personal opinion, nothing puts the kibosh on romance more than your potential girlfriend calling you 'little brother' for almost 20 years. That's taking the classic friend zone tactic of thinking of someone as your sibling to a whole new level.
JP: THERE IS GOING TO BE A LIVE ACTION ALADDIN MOVIE COME 2019 WITH WILL SMITH AS THE GENIE! Whoooop!
I agree with you that Regina is a complete bubblehead, although she was made somewhat more bearable in the anime. What can you say about somebody that's almost a grown woman and believes that there are castles made of cake and talking rabbits in Zimbabwe?! Also, I think the reason all the guys at the circus had a thing for her is that she was the only girl around I don't think anybody is hot enough to be that dumb! XD
I'm happy to bring such happy news about the second season of the anime to one of my favorite readers... I think I am most excited about seeing Godot and Dahlia live! Ask for Phoenix's money situation obviously it was good enough for him to just take off to Asia willy-nilly in SOJ which is not a cheap flight... I think he's just been able to hold his head above the water and she's no longer feeding Maya's bottomless pit stomach but it is nowhere near Miles Edgeworth, red Alfa Romeo sports car level wealth! One thing is for sure and that is that the legendary Phoenix Wright is more than likely more famous than he is rich but I think he wouldn't have it any other way!
Also it's great that you keep an open mind about Franny and Miles they can literally go either way either as rivalry siblings or romantically although you might be selling your writing skills too short by thinking that you couldn't do a good job writing them as a couple... Being a good writer man's challenging yourself which is why funny man CT and I swapped roles with hero and villain songs a few chapters back! :)
Now, respectfully being on a different page regarding Miles and Franny than my co-pilot (it's all good, he likes Junipollo, I like JusticeCykes and we're still friends who still support each other's works because we're awesome like that!) I'd like to share my thoughts of Fredgeworth as a romantic rather than sibs pair, the following states my thoughts as mirrored by this writer. The following is extracted from the subsequent blog links below by a fellow Mitsumei lover (because I couldn't have said it better myself):
"Fredgeworth can be actually a very precious and beautiful relationship with mutual healing and understanding, despite the angsty history of their lives thanks to Manfred von Douchebag. The reason why I support Edgeworth and Franziska is because I want my babies to be happy. Because I believe Edgeworth would be the world's best husband for Franziska. Because Edgeworth is one of few men who truly respects Franziska as a strong and gifted prosecutor and not as a "hot girl." Both of them went through so much, and they are the only ones in the world who can understand each other with their problems. Edgeworth would teach Franziska about the value of truth, and that she doesn't have to be perfect to be loved. They can share their feelings about Manfred, their losses, their jobs, their loneliness. They can talk to each other. They can listen to each other.
They can love. They can be loved.
They can be happy."
Further case in point from that blog:
Bit . ly / 2JI6aVg
Full spiel on Everybody Loves Edgeworth Tumblr:
Bit .ly/ 2lelcU7
*Steps away from defense bench and rubs back of neck, Phoenix style*
Thank you for hearing my closing argument, Your Honor – er, dear reader(s!)