Chapter twenty-three: You really are jealous

I knew it! I knew she would recognise me!

I ignored the voice in my head and tried to buy myself some time by giving her reflection the most confused look I could muster at the moment.

"What?", I asked in her weak voice.

Hawkeye obviously didn't buy it; she folded her arms in front of her chest and frowned.

"You can drop the act, Envy. I know it's you. Turn back, except for the two people outside, no one knows we're here and I didn't tell Roy. I didn't want another flame fest at a party."

Well, shit. I should have made my last will before I came here.

Realising that it made no sense to keep it up any longer, I sighed and morphed back into myself. I still looked like shit. But then again, I had just thrown up my red stones. I felt so weak...

Slowly I turned the wheelchair around and faced the woman.

"What gave me away this time?", I asked tiredly. Last time I had fallen for her trick. Surprisingly, she wasn't pointing her gun at me yet.

"The fact that Edward would never have brought Winry with him in that state and your reaction earlier, even though you covered it up well."

Oh. Figures. She knows them too well. I can't fool her, no matter how hard I try, huh?

Hawkeye continued: "I only know one person who could impersonate Winry that convincingly and that's you. Why are you alive, when I saw you die?! How did you get your hands on all the information? You mentioned things about me and Winry that not even Edward knows about."

I only said this: "I asked her and she told me."

Hawkeye deduced: "In order for you to be able to talk to her, Edward must know..."

No shit, genius!, I thought drily.

"...so why did he turn to you, how did he know that you're alive and how did he convince you to do this? Convincing as your act was, even you can't fake the physical reactions you had. When you started shivering at Roy's words, I knew it was you and that having to hear him talk about you was a torture for you. Surely you must have known this would happen."

I tried to calm myself down and met her eyes. "I won't answer the first two questions."

"Then answer the last one", she compromised.

"I'm impersonating her, because he asked me to." That was the truth. I did it for him.

"I see. What do you feel towards Winry?"

"I don't hate her." Surprisingly, that was no lie either. She was tolerable, considering...

"Good." Hawkeye was silent for a minute before she changed the topic: "What Roy said really got to you, didn't it? First I thought you were bluffing when you said you weren't feeling well, but then Edward said you were coughing up blood – not even a homunculus can fake that."

"It wasn't blood, it was my stones...", I corrected her weakly. Charity's bowl was still in my lap, filled with the red liquid and the remainders of the juice from earlier. I looked at it scornfully.

"I apologise."

Okay, what?! Surely I didn't hear right! "Huh? Say what?!"

"You heard me."

Yup, I did hear right. Damn, could this get any crazier?! "What for", I asked cautiously.

"For Roy being such a jerk. That slandering was uncalled for and it was downright cruel. He's usually better than that."

Better my ass. I would have made a snide remark, but I wasn't in the mood for mockery.

"Why are you being so nice to me?", I asked, just as tiredly as before. "You're supposed to hate me. And you haven't even pulled out your gun yet."

"Well, not everyone holds grudges like Roy does. And I'm not angry at you, not any-more."

Forgiveness...that's what Patience talks about, isn't it?

"Why did you hook up with him?", I asked out of the blue.

Where had that even come from? Oh, never mind.

She chuckled: "Well, someone needs to knock some sense into him once in a while. And with Edward gone, who will do it, if not me?"

I chuckled drily. Suddenly I felt the urge to say something important to her. It was embarrassing, but I guess she deserved it. "Good point. Hey...uh, I'm sorry I tried to kill you back then."

"No hard feelings. But can I ask you one more question?"

Sure, but whether I will answer it, is an entirely different matter.

"Why did you kill Maes Hughes?"

I knew it. But I answered anyway. "Because I was ordered to. Hughes knew too much, so Father sent Lust and me to kill him. She failed, so I shot him. And you know what?"

I laughed hysterically and the shivers and nausea returned full force, as I continued talking without even knowing what I was saying. "It was so damn satisfying! That man, always prancing around and bragging about his family! He was so happy! It made me fucking sick! How can anyone be so happy, when I don't even know what happiness is?!"

Tears...was I crying? In front of her? Again? How humiliating...

Turning back to her, I didn't see anger, disgust or hatred. I saw sadness. Pure sadness and a hint of sympathy. Not pity. Sympathy. Just like when Edward...

"I see", she said quietly. "So Edward was right back then. You really are jealous of humans."

That stung. It stung so much. The memory of how Edward had realised what was going on inside me. The sympathy in these golden eyes, when he had understood me. The reminder was too much for me to bear. Not only did I start to bawl my eyes out, I also threw up again. Could I possibly sink any lower? Didn't think so. Right now, I just wanted to curl up and die.

Hawkeye tore the bathroom door open and called for help. Charity and Edward immediately bust into the room with a first aid kit. For a second Ed was startled, probably because I was in my own shape in front of Hawkeye. Charity didn't bother, she was at my side at once and patted my back, while holding the bowl. After I had calmed down a little, she pulled out a Thermos bottle and poured some hot liquid into a cup.

"Drink this", she encouraged me and handed me the cup. "It does wonders in cases like this one."

Greedily I drank the hot liquid. It ran down my sore throat like honey and made me feel better almost instantly.

Edward looked over to Hawkeye. "So you saw through it, huh? You wanted to confront him?"

Hawkeye nodded: "We ended up having a fairly decent conversation actually. You know, Envy", she told me, "You're not so bad when you're not boasting about evil deeds or trying to kill people."

I grinned lopsidedly: "You're not so bad either, when you're not riddling me with bullets."

She chuckled. Then she turned to Charity: "Well, now that I know what's going on, I would like to know your real identity, Miss Angel. What's your real name?"

Charity sighed: "I'm Charity, one of the Seven Heavenly Virtues. And yes, I'm a homunculus", she added, revealing the blue ouroboros on her forehead. "The Sins are our little siblings. But we left Father, because he was a piece of shit."

"How could I disagree with that!", Hawkeye muttered. "So, are you going home now?"

"Yeah. We just have to find my little sister, Al and Mei and then we're off. I think that this was more than enough excitement for one evening. Envy, do you think you can shapeshift right now?"

Seriously?! Of course I can, you stupid blondie!

I bit back my vicious remarks and left it as a nasty glare, before I turned back into her. Charity smiled in relief. "Good, I was worried you were too out of it. Happened to your Virtue once, that's why I asked. Now, where is my sister, that ginger-haired little beast..."

Suddenly the door was kicked open and said ginger-haired little beast bust in.

"DILIGENCE TO THE RESCUE!", the ginger yelled, "I got the supplies you wanted, Charity, and – who the fuck is that?", she asked, noticing Hawkeye.

Everyone facepalmed.

Envy has a nervous breakdown. Again. And Diligence is here to be comic relief.