Vonne: I realize that I am a little bit behind on updating this; sorry, again! I didn't think that the last chapter would climb past 10 reviews so fast. That being said, I am thrilled that so many of you took the time to leave me a response! Thank you so much! I love hearing from you and blah blah blah blah. Anyways, I made a promise to myself that I would be shorter in these introductions, because I assume a large majority of you do not read them (and why would you, in all honesty, when they are just a composition of my own rambling sentences?). So, I will cut to the chase and get on with the usual business.
Carl: Oh good! Hello again! It's definitely always nice to hear from you. I hope you DO keep coming back, what with my writer's block and all.
LivelyMcBrighten: Thank you so much! I'm so glad that you enjoy this as much as I enjoy writing it. Your reviews definitely motivate me to keep going. Hopefully you didn't consider the gap between chapters to be too long. I don't like keeping people waiting because I definitely know how annoying that can be. I hope you like this chapter, too, and I'm so glad you're going to seeing this to the end.
MCLanna: After I finished writing the last chapter I was a bit weary on even submitting it, mainly because I thought it to be too much of a filler chapter. Not much went on expect for the fact that Hermione was granted permission to pay Malfoy a visit. However, her visit is important so I wanted to set it up properly. In the end, I could have made her visit part of the last chapter, but I really wanted to give that section of the story its own chapter. Still, I'm glad you enjoyed it- that makes me feel a bit better about it for sure.
Le Candeh: Thank you very much and I will!
Psychic City: HA, well, looks like we are both slacking off, seeing as I just got to the chapter right now. I promised I would update after ten reviews and I hadn't even got half of this chapter penned down. Before I knew it, ten reviews had come and gone. Whoops. From now on, I shouldn't make any promises. Nothing seems to ever pan out the way I intend for them to... ever.
Hpcrazyy: I definitely agree with you- eight reviews is amazing and I'm so happy that I even got up to that point with such a short and uneventful chapter that the last one is. Nonetheless, I am so behind. All these reviews mounted up on me like crazy and I didn't even see it coming. Thanks for your support in reviewing anyway. You know, it's so funny because whenever authors I like 'hold their story for ransom' I always made unsigned reviews to fill in the review requirements that they needed in order to update. ;) Hmmm. Either way, thanks so much! One thousand kisses to whomever you are. Or, maybe I'm just assuming? :)
Dramionefiend: Thank you so much! I hope this chapter was something to look forward to!
Pearlrose33: Exactly! So, at least there's some light at the end of this tunnel so far! I hope you enjoy reading this chapter, which will be about Hermione's visit. I needed to add more Hermione and Draco time into this, so I figured this was necessary, hm? :) Oh, and hopefully my writer's block will cure itself. Its not that I'm having trouble with where I want to go in this, its just that I'm having issue on how to begin writing it. I'm in too much of a hurry and I don't want to feel rushed, you know? Anyway, thanks again for your reviews!
TragicSlytherin: Oh good! HA, its just that I'm nearing the end of this and I'm getting all this anxiety built up about the ending. After about 60 long chapters (don't forget 'Radio'), I'm worried that everyone won't be too happy with the ending in some way or another. Like, I'll leave something important out of it, or someone will want to ship two people together, or I've totally gone off the deep end with an issue. Nonetheless, I'm going to keep up with what I have planned. I think that it suits this well and makes the most sense. AH! Well, I'm glad that you're going to stick with me- means a lot! :)
Fogell: Aw, thank you so much for your comment and review. I'm so glad that you like this story, because that really means a lot to me. I love responding back to everyone and I agree with you. People should at least acknowledge that other people have taken the time to submit reviews to whatever it is that they've written. There are SO MANY fanfictions written about Harry Potter that its amazing to me that people even chose mine to read out of the majority of these. Basket Case has so many alerts, hits, and favorites that I am literally blown away. So, responding back to all of you is definitely the least that I can do. :)
Alice Wednesday: Oh definitely. Malfoy will be at Hobb's for the vast remainder of this story, for sure. But maybe there's hope for him yet- let's hope he gets out of there SOON. Or else maybe he'll have no other option to go COMPLETELY out of his mind. Anyway, with Patel I wanted to show that maybe there is hope in Draco's situation yet. Besides, it DOES help when he's associated with the three kids that saved the Wizarding World's ass a couple years ago, doesn't it? Friends in extremely high places, so to speak...
Voldyismyfather: Definitely! Hermione visiting Draco is definitely a good thing in this situation. Maybe they can work something out?
WeatherWatch: Whoop! You were my first review, right away on this chapter! Thank you! Sorry that I put you last on this list- I started from the latest. But still, I definitely appreciate the comments and reviews you've been consistently leaving for me! They make my day- yay! And I definitely was glad to add something about Goyle in this chapter. You're actually the only one who noticed that I slipped that in there. Didn't want to forget about Draco's only remaining friend. :)
Anyway, this is going to be a long chapter- YAY! :)
Chapter Twenty-Four
Spitting out the Demons
Hermione Granger felt consumed by the lengthy hallway that stretched out everlasting before her. A long chill crept up her back, convincing her of the true hollowness of Hobb's asylum in general. She was led by the vision of the dark shadow, a man dressed in white that had barely addressed her since she had walked in to the place with Harry and Ron at her side. Instead he only seemed to just lure her, deeper within the confines of the secure institution. Yet Hermione was certain; Hobb's was a prison. The white paint that had lined the walls so delicately at the place's entrance seemed to chip as they traveled deeper inside of the place. Shouts of the patients rattled her to the very core and she tried to remain collected as she heard the footsteps of the institute's patients behind the closed doors of their bedrooms. She had perhaps not fully prepared herself for the sight of it; knowing that Draco Malfoy was suffering along with them was enough to make her hazy with every continual step forward.
And yet she continued to follow the asylum director. In his white uniform, he looked daunting, even to Hermione who remained only a visitor to the place. Though she had left Ron and Harry back at the entrance to wait for her, she was certain that she had lost all of her confidence without them to support her. Nonetheless, she attempted to swallow her nerves, plunging her quivering hands into the depths of her jacket pocket for protection. She tried to focus on something else- anything that would take her mind away from Hobb's, even if only for a second. As they swept by the remainder of rooms that lined the hallway, Hermione counted the movements of her feet, further readying herself. Yet her mind only seemed to thrust her back into a similar circle. Without intention, she found herself almost hysterical with worry. How had she let this happen? As she had wondered during her sleepless nights alone, she asked herself: how could things have ever sunk so low?
She was supposed to be the cure for Malfoy's obvious unhappiness; she had promised him that she would make it better. And yet the horrifying realization of her failure had hit her harder than a ton of bricks. She had only made the situation worse. The notion that perhaps Draco Malfoy would have been better off without her was one that both frightened and plagued her mercilessly. Desperately, she shook the thought from her mind, feeling the sway of nausea catch her throat. She couldn't loose control- she had to do this, she had to see him... perhaps only to just say how sorry she was.
However, while caught up in her own collection of miserable thoughts, Hermione felt a shift in the atmosphere of the building around her. The man ahead of her was no longer moving. Instead, he had halted himself, pausing in front of a small little door, labeled 'Visitations'. Upon sight of it, her stomach dropped and her mouth ran dry. When her leader proclaimed aloud, "this is it," she had to take a moment to even adjust to her new surroundings. This was it, too; Draco Malfoy, he was right behind those doors. The boy that she had both loved and doomed was there, waiting for her in the very flesh. No longer did she had to imagine him, no longer did she have to wish for him. He was there, so realistically so... trapped there because of no one but her.
"I-I... I can go in?" Hermione asked, staring at the door despite her nerves. Her eyes watched the man nod, though she could hardly make out the voice that carried his answer. Instead, she could only hear the thundering rhythm of her profoundly beating heart. It threatened to pound itself right out of her chest and onto the sterile floor within the moment. Yet the situation was too surreal, too far fetched and unimaginable. She wanted to turn around and run back down the hall, afraid of what Draco might say to her; and yet she could hardly contain her desire to kick the door down, rush inside, and swoop him up in a deep and passionate kiss.
For the first time, the man leaning above her opened his mouth. He spoke with authority and strength, booming a powerful tone that made even Hermione shrink down a little. "We will signal you when we are ready for you to make your leave, Ms. Granger," he stated, looking blank faced and serious. "It is my understanding that Mr. Potter would like a word with Malfoy as well?" Hermione nodded, but her eyes remained focused on the door. She retracted when the big man reached forward, brushing his hand down into the front of his pocket to withdraw his own stick-like wand in response. He gave a minute little tap on the surface of the thing and she heard the wall shift. Ever so slightly the massive door opened, granting her a small space to slip through.
"Listen for our call," instructed the man, watching Hermione carefully. She did not move although her brown eyes scanned the opening wearily. Instead she pressed her eyes shut, stalling before the door, adjusting to her own personal silence before stepping forwards. Yet when she finally did it, she did so in a stumble using the walls to support her havering step. Then he watched her disappear, vanishing behind the facade of darkness as slowly as she had come. Thus, the working man leaned forward, tapping the door once again with the tip of his wand for the final time. And the big door crept shut, enclosing the girl inside as it collided with the heavy frame.
Behind it, Hermione blinked. The room was much smaller than she had expected, and far darker, too. It took her only a moment for her vision to adjust before she even saw him. And yet, there he was, position in his seat across the broad table that lay out before her. She saw him before she even really got a good look at how simple the room was, before she had even noticed the lack of windows. His slumped figure was heart-breaking and he hadn't even looked up from the floorboards. Thus, the only thing that she had been certain of was his head of greasy blond hair. It dangled in front of his hidden face and through the silence she was certain she'd heard him groan.
"D-Draco?" Hermione whispered, and Malfoy's head slipped upward. Yet the way in which he moved made Hermione's heart ache. His head practically lolled upwards, tiredly as if pulled into the air by a hidden string. His eyes flashed, trying to focus onto the shadow in front of him that he could not truly make out. And the expression on his face was vacant, as if he were not truly one within himself, but only a former ghost of whatever it was that he had been before. "...Draco," Hermione tried again, stepping forward. She made her way to the empty chair across from him at the other end of the table. The room was quiet and almost too much so; Hermione could hear his heavy breaths as he struggled to fill his lungs.
"'Mione...?" slurred Malfoy's figure, uneasy as if intoxicated. He looked as if he had trouble even holding up his head.
Hermione's eyes narrowed and her chest dropped. She wanted to lean forward and brush his hand, though she could see that they had been bound together by the wrists, and forced into his lap. Nonetheless, Hermione motioned forward, leaning across the table with her hands outward as if she wanted to touch his cheek. "Draco..." she started, looking uncertain and all the more ill with every passing moment. "... C-Can you hear me?"
Malfoy's eyes flicked upwards. He appeared as if he were having trouble even remaining focused onto her. However, his mouth slipped up into a sad smile, his glassy eyes scanning her face solemnly. She could see past his false expression and her shoulders slumped in response. He moaned, looking overly sloppy, and blinked, trying to remain as if he appeared somewhat okay. "... I missed you," he said back to her, continuing to inch downwards in his seat.
But Hermione shook her head. Something was not okay. Behind Draco's eyes, there was nothing. He looked lost, forlorn, and distant. He appeared as if only sleep-talking, not quite aware of the rest of the world around him. He had lost something in his eyes; behind his weary smile, she felt only heavy sadness. She felt her face drain, completely thrown off by all the expectations that she had before she had seen him. Sure, she had expected him to be mad or angry with her, silent even... however, seeing him in the way she saw him then... she couldn't have even imagined.
He looked as if he couldn't even sit up straight, and she was certain that he couldn't. She felt a sob rise in the middle of her throat; he could hardly even hold the spit in his mouth, and his eyes seemed to pour over with unintentional tears he was not even aware he was shedding. Yet his smile remained persistent and he shifted forward like a rag doll despite Hermione's horror. "I th-think about you all the time," he offered deliriously.
Hermione felt her own set of tears escape her eyes and she couldn't help it when they managed to roll down the front of her face. "Oh, Draco," she whispered, staring at him at a loss. While she had felt helpless so recently, she had never been prepared to feel the way that she'd felt then. Staring at Draco was something brand new. Drugged and completely out of it, Hermione was certain that any normal conversation was far out of any realistic possibility.
Guilt flooded through her and the room grew hot with intensity. She felt surprised that he had even remembered her at the moment, astounded and even impressed that he had managed to keep his eyes opened even slightly. He did not move his head to shift his hair from his eyes, instead he remained in his rugged position; his shoulders were slumped forward and he remained almost unable to position himself upright. It was all her fault... every bit of it. And she could hardly take looking at him anymore; could hardly manage to keep her view focused on his obviously unaware expression. She sniffed, still watching Malfoy's dazed smile as it only tainted his pale and bruised face.
Something about her finally gave way and her eyes flooded over responsively. Yet Malfoy's face dropped, and his smile faded. "... What's the matter?" he asked her, having just noticed her tears for the first time. He seemed greatly upset by them, and his face twisted, greatly pained by her grief. "Don't cry Hermione," he begged, yet she wondered if he even understood the concept behind her visit in the first place.
"What have they done to you, Draco?" she asked morosely, her voice breaking as she broke out every syllable.
But Draco only shook his head, his blond hair falling across his forehead in a messy manner. "'M okay," he lied, and Hermione could tell. It took him a long while to even react to her sentences. Nonetheless, he did the best that his body would allow him. He furrowed his brows, watching Hermione through the haze that seemed to perplex his vision. "Don't... don't cry, okay?"
Although Hermione could hardly keep herself contained. She copied Malfoy's action, shaking her head thickly with harsh enthusiasm. Even as drugged out as he was, he still found a way to lie to her. "No you're not okay, Draco," she insisted, restraining herself from pounding her fist down on the table completely. "They've completely drugged you!" she gestured to his wrists with her palm, "you... you can't even move your hands!" She felt her voice croak again with frustration and she allowed her hair to fall in front of her own face.
But Draco only seemed to ignore her statement. Instead, he blinked and chewed desperately on his bottom lip. A trail of spit crept from his mouth as he said in a low and miserable whine, "d-don't c-cry, o-okay? I-It makes me s-sad when t-to... seeing you cry makes me sad, 'Mione."
Hermione's face crunched up significantly. She pushed the tears from her cheeks and looked up at the ceiling, feeling herself break down completely. With a sob, she murmured to herself, "fuck..."
She watched as Draco's eyes swept sideways, still appearing to fret over Hermione's blatantly miserable state. He did not seem to notice that his wrists were bound and he did not seem to care that he could hardly keep himself seated properly. Rather, he acted childlike, pouting despite the dripping saliva. His reddened face disheartened her and she found that she couldn't even truly look him in the eyes. "'M ok..." he told her, "really."
"STOP LYING TO ME!" Hermione shouted. She couldn't help herself. She was arguing with a man that didn't even know half of the words that were coming out of his mouth. But something about her collective attitude could not remain together. She felt herself slipping, unable to contain sort of collective composure. She hated this Hobb's, hated what they'd done to Draco. Couldn't they see that they had broken him? "Shit!" Hermione swore, burying her face in the palms of her hands, "... shit!"
Feeling a sob rise up in her chest, Hermione slumped her torso forward. She hugged her stomach before slipping her clammy fingers back up to the crown of her head, tugging at the roots of her brown hair. Anxiety tainted her chest and she glanced back upwards as she blinked out the tears from her eyes. Then, she lifted her hand to cover her own mouth. Without moving, Hermione stared back at Draco. His head had not moved, but his eyes had fallen to the center of his lap. She analyzed the red tip of his runny nose and the bruised complexion of his battered face. For a moment, she sat still, covering her mouth, and waiting for a solution to come to her. But she seemed to be all out of ideas, unsurprisingly; such a loss had become quite a trend for her as of lately.
However, the timid sound across from Hermione made her blink back to reality. Sniffing, Draco muttered meekly across the table to her, "... 'M s-sorry..."
And Hermione thought that she couldn't have been more to blame beforehand. However, his misery had only caused her guilt to double. What was she doing getting so frustrated with Draco Malfoy anyway? As drugged and as out of it as he was before he, he truly had not an idea of the words coming out of his mouth; he could barely keep his eyes open for Heaven's sake. Mentally Hermione cursed herself, a bout of her own loathing rising up fitfully in the center of her chest. Yet she managed to break away from her own personal space. Sighing, she slipped away from her seat and crept towards Draco in a tiptoed motion.
Though Draco only flinched as she approached him, glancing downwards with a slightly humiliated expression on his face. She did not yield, however. Instead, she bent down, positioning herself on her knees in front of the metal seat that Draco sat at. He did not avert his eyes. Consequently, he looked up at her with glossy eyes, his face still tormented and twisted. Yet she could clearly see the obvious distress behind his vision, and he looked as if he were about to burst into tears at every passing minute. "Oh, Draco," Hermione said again, considering his solemn visage with certain care. "D-Don't be sorry, okay? T-There's nothing for you to be sorry about, okay? Do you understand that?"
Malfoy did not answer her. Instead he only continued to watch, fascinated by her sad expression. It seemed to torment him, yet Hermione was not certain that he would even remain conscious for much longer. The thought of his assumedly medicated existence made her entire body feel weak and she felt light headed and distraught as she stared in his teary eyes. Standing back analytically, she studied Malfoy's face, before feeling her own visage falter as well. "I'm sorry, okay?" she insisted, unable to keep her distance any longer. And she felt herself so swept up in the moment. With that, she leaned forward and grabbed his face with both of her hands.
Breathing in, it felt so good to touch him. She overlooked his freezing cold skin and the bruises that overlapped it. Nonetheless, she was caught up in simply holding him, and she had waited for it for so, so long. "I'm the one who should be sorry, Draco. I'm not sad," she lied to him, for the first time that she could truly remember in a long time. "I'll be okay if you're okay... I promise."
Draco's body slumped forward and for a moment Hermione thought that it had done so as only a reaction to all the medication. However, at second glance she noticed that he had moved his head by will, nuzzling his head into her palms and pressing his eyes shut as he did so. He said with his eyes pressed lightly shut, "p-please d-don't go." He waited for a second before adding back to her, "I don't want to be alone anymore."
And finally Hermione knew that she could no longer contain herself. She felt her eyes pool over, tears rolling down her face conclusively. She sobbed in front of him, breathing in as if she had been held underwater for a long, long time. Nonetheless, she leaned forward and pressed her lips up against his. And though it took him a moment to respond back, she felt her body warm when she felt his lips working back against hers. He did not move quickly, though. Instead, he took hold of her lower lip with his, lingering there before whispering back against her, "I think I've officially lost it, Hermione..."
"No you haven't, Draco," Hermione insisted, pulling back long enough to run her hands through his hair. He looked so sad, so absolutely miserable and she could hardly take the pain of looking back at him. Yet she moved the stay locks of blond hair from his face and placed it behind his ear, revealing more of his visage to her properly. "You're okay, Draco," she said back to him, wiping the stray tears from his eyes, "you're okay- you're just drugged."
But it was Malfoy's turn to shake his head. "I-I-I... I s-see h-him e-everywhere... h-his v-voice in my h-head..." He took a breath, his lips quivering intensely. "H-He's i-in my dreams a-and s-so are you." He looked at her in disbelief, as if she were about to walk away from him at any moment. "You always die in my dreams." Then, with that, he sunk into Hermione's chest, burying his face into her collar. He fell into her as if by accident and she considered the fact that perhaps his body could not take his physical state any longer.
The sound of him crying into her chest made her heart ache miserably. He seemed to be having a trouble with even his own tired breaths. And still she worried that she was loosing him; he seemed to slacken, as if finally loosing consciousness at last. Hermione shut her eyes. "Shh..." she whispered back to him, wrapping her arms around his hunched over back. "It's okay, Draco, I promise that its okay."
"Y-You always die," Malfoy continued, wanting to hold her back despite his inability to do so, "a-and h-h-he a-always kills you... I-I c-can never s-save you," he mumbled, choking on his own fractured speech. "I a-always chose him."
Vonne: This fiction is nearing its end... can you guess you figure out what's going on before everything comes to a final close? ;)