The bowling alley was surprisingly dead for a Saturday so there wasn't a wait for two lanes next to each other. They decided that they'd split into four teams. Couples Darlene, David, Mark and Becky and then Jackie, Dan, DJ and the boys. The winners would go against the other winners in the championship. Dan would go with DJ if they ended up winning against Jackie.

David and Mark and never really gone bowling with the Conner's so when Dan rolled a strike in every frame but two they watched in amazement and laughed hard when he danced after each strike.

They all carried on conversations between turns, as the girls were happy to spend time with their family. Jackie bought everyone soda, and Dan found out that he liked Dr. Pepper. Darlene ate like crazy and came close to trying everything on the menu by the end of the night.

"Yabba dabba doo!" Dan yelled as he did a victory leap. His family stared at him and he realized he was mocking Fred Flintstone. As expected Dan and DJ beat Jackie and went against Mark and Becky. It was a surprisingly close game but Dan and DJ won. Darlene and David came dead last. They never counted Andy and Jerry so Jackie came second to last.

The family left the alley happily and everyone went on their merry way.

On Sunday Dan and DJ spent the whole day cleaning the whole house and the garage. Then that night they dropped Jerry off with Becky and Mark and then went to the movies and saw Jurassic Park the Lost World.

A week had passed with little drama or activity. The Conner's got into a groove where Dan would get up in the morning change Jerry, wake up DJ, DJ would feed Jerry while Dan took a shower, then Dan would come out and DJ would leave for school and Dan would make Jerry's diaper bag and drop him off at Jackie's and go to work. When he'd get off work, Dan would usually go to AA then pick up Jerry, come home and make dinner.

On Friday DJ and his friends left for Chicago, so Dan took the opportunity to host a poker night late at night. Luckily Jerry went right to sleep and Dan enjoyed his first poker game in almost a month and a half.

This poker game put Dan a tad bit at unease. He had made it clear that he didn't mind if his friends drank but that didn't mean he didn't feel the urge. He could tell that his friends also felt unease about drinking in front of Dan.

Also his friends were doing everything in their power to limit the conversation to topics that wouldn't cause Dan to miss/remember Roseanne. Considering they usually talked about sexual topics and their wives or girlfriends that only left cars and tools.

When the game was over Dan had collected 32 dollars plus a sense of accomplishment for not giving into his urges. As he was cleaning up the kitchen table the phone rang. Dan wondered who it could be this late at night.

"Hello?" He said, happily.

"Dan, I saw you're kid at a gas station outside of Okawville."

Dan couldn't believe what he heard. "What?"

"Your son and some friends." Dan's friend said in a confirming way.

"Thanks Rocko. Bye." Dan hung up but then dialed Darlene's number.

"Hello?" David said sleepily as he lay next to Darlene in their apartment in Chicago.

"David put my daughter on the phone." David knew the jig was up after Dan referred to Darlene as his daughter. David turned and gently pushed Darlene awake. She woke up and took the phone.

"Hello?" She said also sleepily.

"Hi, Darlene. I was just calling to see if you've talked to DJ today?" Dan's voice was normal like nothing was wrong.

"Yeah he got into Chicago just fine, dad." Darlene said sleepily.

"Really, so what was he doing in Okawville?" Darlene rolled her eyes.

"Going to a film festival in St. Louis." Darlene said before hanging up the phone, leaving Dan mad at two of his four kids.

In the morning, Dan drove his beat up pickup truck to St. Louis, going through every bad thing he did as a kid in his mind to figure out why his bad karma was coming back around to him in the form of DJ. He drove on and on until he hit farmland and eventually he saw the faintest glimpse of the Gateway Arch in the distance. He continued on eventually crossing a bridge over the Mississippi River. By then he needed gas so he pulled into the first gas station he saw.

As he put the nozzle in the gas tank he spoke to the man about his dad's age on the other side of the pump. "Excuse me, sir, can you tell me where the film festival is?"

The man nodded. "Forest Park." The man continued talking and rattled off street directions while pointing. "The Children's Hospital overlooks the field and the zoo."

Dan nodded. "Thank you, sir." Dan finished putting gas in his truck and then crossed the parking lot to go pay.

Later Dan circled Forest Park looking for a parking spot; finally he gave up and parked on the side of the road and walked to the field. As he got closer and closer to the field there were more and more people until eventually the crowd was thick. Dan imagined this was a little like Woodstock.

There was a huge screen at the far end of the field. The film festival was a cheaper one so some people were sprawled out on blankets and others were seated on foldable chairs. Dan scanned the crowds looking for his sons black hair. He stood still for a few minutes just looking, when he was bumped into from behind and knocked down on the ground.

He was on his stomach, as he heard a whole bunch of hollering and profanity being exchanged between three or four drunken men. One of the men, who were surprisingly bigger than Dan, tripped over Dan's leg and ended up on his stomach on the back of Dan's legs. Dan had a quick football dog pile flash back and struggled to get off the ground, he was unable too so he bent his arm and tried to elbow the guy on top of him. He was unable to do this, and was pinned on the ground until two cops came and broke up the fight. One cop pulled the man on Dan off of Dan and Dan remained on the ground fearing the cop's reaction.

"Put your hands behind your back and interlock your fingers." Dan heard one cop say, sternly. "I said put your hands behind your back and interlock your fingers." The same cop said louder. Dan realized the cop was talking to him and did as he told.

As soon as he did Dan felt the familiar metal feeling on his skin and heard the clinging of hand cuffs. The cop grabbed Dan by the collar of his coat.

"You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to an attorney; if you cannot afford one will be provided for you. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law." Dan felt his stomach sink while he was being read his rights.

By now two more cops were on the scene and the biggest one took control of Dan and led him through the crowd.

Dan's leg was sore and he struggled to keep pace with the young cop. People in the crowd were ignorant and didn't get out of the way. One man shoulder checked Dan and Dan tripped unable to catch himself with his hands behind his back. The cop helped Dan get back on his feet and led Dan to a cop car.

The last thing Dan saw as the cop pushed his head down into the car was DJ staring in shock with his friends.

"Hey DJ, isn't that your dad?" Xavier asked.

"Yeah it was and I am screwed." DJ shook his head, as he quickly remembered the day his dad told him her was in jail. "I have to get to a pay phone."

DJ and his friends walked around until they found a pay phone. DJ put the money inside it and dialed. The phone rang three times before David answered.

"Hello?" David answered cheerfully.

"David, is Darlene there?" DJ asked frantically.

David cocked his head, "Uh yeah." David got Darlene's attention and then handed her the phone.

"Hello?" Darlene answered.

"Darlene! Dad found out and came to get me!" DJ was interrupted by his sister.

"So avoid him. Put on a Cardinals hat or something, he'd never think to look for you wearing one of those." Darlene said coolly.

"No you don't understand! I saw a cop put him into a cop car." DJ's voice was cracking with excitement.

Darlene paused for a minute. "Are you sure it was dad?"

DJ shook his head, "Positive."

Darlene looked down at her feet. "Well you're going to have to be the second kid to bail dad out."

"What do you mean the second kid?"

"Didn't dad tell you? I was the one to bail him out the first time."

"You? You, bailed him out? I thought that was mom." DJ found himself sort of laughing, as the image of his Dad behind bars looking at Darlene filled his head.

"Of course you did."

DJ thought for a minute. "How do I do I bail him out?"

Darlene smiled. "Go to the police station. Find a cop behind a desk and tell him your there to bail Daniel Conner out. When he tells you how much his bail is and you don't have enough money call me."

DJ shook his head in annoyance of his sister. "How much was it to bail him out the first time, Darlene?"

"100 Dollars and you're not really bailing him out. You have to give him the money since you're a minor."

The phone commanded DJ to put in more money so the two siblings said bye and hung up.

"What'd your sister say?" Xavier asked.

"I have to bail out my dad." DJ's friends came together. "Where's the police station?"

When Darlene hung up the phone she was giggling. David smiled. "What's so funny, Darlene?"

"Yet again my dad is being bailed out by one of his kids…" Darlene said out loud as David watched Darlene dial Jackie's phone number.

"Hello?" Jackie answered cheerfully.

"Aunt Jackie? DJ just called me and said dad was arrested."

Jackie paused for a minute. "Come again?"

"My dad just got arrested."

Jackie looked quizzically. "In St. Louis?"

"I think so. Let's just hope he wasn't wearing his Cubs hat."

Jackie frowned and looked down at her feet. "St. Louis won't let DJ bail your dad out, not if he's from out of the state. If DJ calls you again tell him to just wait for me to come."

"Jackie, you got the boys. We'll go."

Jackie shook her head even though Darlene couldn't see. "No, no, Darlene. I'll go. Besides I'm more qualified to handle your brother."

Darlene smiled as she imagined the horrible death that was going to come upon DJ when their father gets out of Jail. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah I'm sure."

"Okay bye"

"Bye."

Dan felt very claustrophobic in the back of that cop car with the other man who was bigger than him sitting next to him. They both had their hands handcuffed behind them and seat belts across their chests.

With every foot driven Dan became more and more concerned about the other man's extremely violent stare. Finally the car pulled into a parking lot. Dan watched as each of the cops opened a door. The same cop opened Dan's door and Dan slid out and the man held a firm grip on Dan's coat. Dan was very careful to be as cooperating as possible.

They were led inside the building and through a door marked: BOOKING and were both led to a holding cell. Dan's cop undid the hand cuffs behind his back but then put Dan's right hand in a handcuff connected to a chain that was connected to a hook on the floor. "A duty officer will be with you shortly." He said.

Dan watched his fellow prisoner also be chained to the floor and was relieved to see that neither of their chains would allow them to make contact. The other cop left and the two were left by themselves. Dan wondered where the other two men were and then found himself craving a cigarette really bad.

Within eight minutes an older cop close to his sixties came and unlocked Dan's handcuff. Dan made sure to stay still while the older man took Dan's left hand and cuffed that one. At least Dan's cuffs were in front of him of him, he thought.

The cop sat Dan in a chair and then redid the handcuffs so Dan had one free hand while the other was handcuffed to the armrest.

The cop sat behind the desk, and tapped the mouse of his computer.

"Look, I'll make you a deal. You cooperate with me and I won't waste your time." Dan shook his head. "Okay, what's your name?" The man turned nicer.

"Daniel Stephen Conner."

"How do you spell that O-R?"

"No. E-R."

"Okay," the cop typed on the keyboard.

"Age?"

"45."

"Birthday?"

"June 20, 1952."

"Address?"

Dan rattled off his address effortlessly. "714 Delaware Street, Lanford Illinois, 51062."

"Illinois?"

"Yeah."

"Have you consumed any alcoholic beverages or drugs today?"

"No. I uh gave up drinking."

The cop flashed a weak smile. "Good for you. Are you married?"

Dan had been answering the questions as soon as possible but now Dan went quiet, now. "She uh was killed in a car accident."

The cop seemed sympathetic. "I'm sorry. Do you have any kids?"

"Four."

"Can I have their names?"

Dan named then in the order they were born. "Rebecca, Darlene, David Jacob, and Jerry. Becky she has a different last name. It's Healy."

The cop nodded as he pulled open a drawer and put a piece of paper in front of Dan.

"Do you understand the rights given you?" The cop asked.

"Yes."

"Good sign this to acknowledge that."

Dan did as he was told then the old cop motion for an African American cop to take Dan away.

The new cop led Dan to another room where he took off Dan's handcuffs and allowed Dan to take off his belt, his shoelaces, wedding ring, and watch. He also took off his coat. The cop watched him. "Un-tuck you shirt." Dan nodded and un-tucked his shirt.

The cop led Dan to a podium where he finger printed Dan, and then led him to a wall for his mug shot. Dan looked in the camera and smiled weakly, much as the same way he smiled last time he was getting his mug shot taken.

Finally Dan was given the option of a phone call which he took. He called Jackie, and she was giddy. "Dan, didn't you learn your lesson last time?"

Dan rolled his eyes. "Don't go there Jackie, I'm innocent this time."

"Oh innocent?" Dan was really annoyed now, after all the last time he was in jail it was because he was protecting Jackie and now she was acting like this. She shouldn't be acting like that even if she was kidding.

"Jackie. GET. HERE. QUICK." Dan growled hiding his mouth from the cop guarding him.

Jackie went more serious. "I talked to Darlene. I will drop the kids off with my mom and then come and rescue you."

Dan sighed. "Don't forget to leave my son to me."

"Bye."

"Bye." Dan hung up the phone and then the cop escorted Dan to another cell.

About twenty other guys were in this big open cell. Dan could guess who was in for what. Three guys had bright, risqué skull tattoo's and five others had thick glasses and were hiding in a corner, Dan walked slowly and casually to the other corner of the cell and sat down, careful to not stare at any one or make eye contact. He was really craving a cigarette.

As he sat there in the cell Dan thought over everything. He had a sinking helpless feeling in his stomach, as his situation looked grim. Last time he was arrested the cops stalled processing him and it only took an hour for him to be bailed out. Although that time it was Darlene. Dan felt mad that he was arrested and that DJ ran away to St. Louis. He also found himself thinking about being a grandfather, being sober, Roseanne, Jackie, Jerry, his daughters, Bev, him mom Audrey, his dad Ed, Crystal, Lonnie and his brother and sister.

DJ took twenty minutes to gain the courage needed to go into the police station, Xavier offered to go in with him, but DJ declined wanting to keep this an experience between him and his dad.

He took a breath and opened the door. Inside there were chairs lined up like a waiting room at the doctor's and then there were three cops behind a long counter. DJ made his way to the counter.

"Can I help you?" Asked one of the uniformed officers.

DJ was nervous but spoke any way. "I'm here to see about bailing out my dad."

The officer nodded and typed on her computer. "How old are you son?"

"14." DJ squeaked. The cop shook his head.

"Sorry son, you're too young, you have to be at least 18."

DJ spoke a bit louder and faster. "Can I give him the money?"

The cop nodded softly. "What's you're dads name?"

DJ thought about it for a minute. He knew his dads name but didn't know for sure if it was Daniel.

"Daniel Conner."

The cop scrolled the computer. "Sorry, no. Not if he was arrested out of state."

DJ made a gesture that he agreed and then made a quick getaway before any one asked any questions or comments about him.

Xavier was waiting outside for him. "Any luck?"

DJ shook his head no then made his way back to the pay phone. He dialed Darlene's number.

"You are so dead DJ." Was his sister's response.

DJ cringed. "Is it really that bad?"

"Jackie's coming to bail out dad."

DJ closed his eyes. "Great."

"Jackie wants you to go to your hotel and stay there." Darlene said, liking how that rolled off her tongue.

"All right. Bye." DJ whined and then went back.

An hour passed and Jackie found that she had to wait for her mother to finish with her old ladies bridge club that was taking place in her mother's apartment at the retirement center.

"Mom, I really need to leave. Can't you watch the boys and play cards?" Jackie asked, minding her tone still trying to better her relationship with her mom.

"I'm sorry, Jackie, but you'll just have to wait for me to finish. It'll only be twenty more minutes." Jackie watched her mother's face and saw a devilish grin as Jackie realized what was going on.

Jackie felt furious at her mother but sat down and swallowed her anger. This was not the time to start a fight.

In the jail cell Dan swallowed repeatedly trying to get over this cigarette craving. He was extremely hungry and tired but was afraid to attempt sleeping. He grew restless but remained in his spot which he deemed safe. A uniformed cop came to the cell door.

"CONNER!" Dan looked around and when no one else responded he stood up and went to the door.

The cop unlocked the door and let Dan out. Dan brought his hands together in front of him but the cop shook her head and gently tapped them down. "Nah, you're being released."

Dan looked at the cop curiously. "Witnesses claimed you were not involved in the fight. They said you were just knocked down."

"That's what happened." Dan smiled.

"Okay. Come with me to get your stuff and you're free to go." Dan followed as the cop led him out of the holding room and through a different door. They ended up in a small room packed with bins that were overstocked with stuff. The cop found the one marked: CONNER, D. and brought it down.

Dan rifled through it and found his belt, his shoelaces, his hoodie, his wallet and his watch. There was also a tiny Ziploc bag containing his wedding ring. Dan took a minute and put these items all on including his wedding ring. The cop produced a form.

"This is the inventory receipt for our records." Dan nodded in understanding and signed it. As the cop was leading down out of the room, the cop turned. "Oh yeah, a kid came by looking for you. We told him he was too young to post bail."

Dan rolled his eyes. "Thank you."

DJ and Xavier's hotel room had two beds, a small table, a dresser, and a bathroom. DJ felt the weight of guilt crushing his chest. He left the room and went to a vending machine. As he bent down to take the Coke from the bottom he felt an eerie presence and turned around quickly.

"Oh DJ I hope you still go to church because only God will be able to help you now." Dan said looking down at his son as he slowly forced DJ to back up until his back was touching the vending machine.

"Dad I'm sorry…" DJ was trembling as Dan gently took his son but the hood. Dan was not going to hurt DJ, but he did want to scare DJ. The two walked and DJ was able to get to his hotel room. Xavier appeared. He saw Dan and began to walk away but Dan who saw him back called Xavier into the room.

"Do your parents know where you are?" Dan asked sternly and Xavier and DJ locked eyes.

"No." Xavier finally said.

Dan stood straighter and then pointed to both boys. "Both of you get your crap."

The boys immediately did as they were told and Dan led them to the checkout guests where both boys paid for the room.

It was a long and agonizing walk to Dan's old blue pickup truck. The boys climbed in, DJ prayed that the truck would start and felt relieved when it did.

The drive from St. Louis Missouri to Lanford Illinois was uncomfortable, quiet and depressing. Dan had to stop and get gas again.

Once they reached the Lanford city limits Dan spoke to Xavier. "What street do you live on?"

"Sycamore." Dan nodded and then drove to Sycamore and Xavier navigated Dan to his house. When they reached his house, Dan parked the truck in the driveway and then told DJ to stay in the car.

Dan knocked on the door with Xavier beside him. A man older than Dan answered the door.

"Excuse me sir. I'm Dan Conner. DJ Conner's father. My son and Xavier here ran away to attend a film festival in St. Louis yesterday." Xavier's father nodded grimly and called down Xavier's mother. His dad told his mom what happened, and then his mom spoke to Dan.

"Thank you sir for returning Xavier to us. I appreciate it." Dan and the parents shook hands.

DJ waited in the truck until Dan came out. Dan said nothing and drove home. Dan parked in the backyard like usual and the two went inside. In the kitchen Dan pointed to the chair that was next to the phone.

"That looks like a nice place to sit." DJ looked at the chair quizzically and sat down. Dan watched him and then went into the living room and watched TV. DJ sat there and began to feel like a six year old in time out. DJ watched the hands of the clock do a 360 and started to feel impatient as he had no idea how long he was to be confined to this chair.

Finally Jackie appeared with the boys. DJ's eyes pleaded with her for an intervention but Jackie shook her head. "I'm with your dad on this one." Andy rushed past DJ and ran to Dan and jumped on him.

"Uncle Dan!" Andy said giving Dan a hug.

"Hi little man!" Jackie gave Jerry to Dan.

"I do believe he's ready to take his first steps." Jackie said as she sat in the chair that was in front of the fireplace.

Dan looked at Jerry who had definitely grown a lot, as Jackie turned to look at DJ. "How long is he chained there?" She asked.

Dan looked at DJ too. "Armageddon."

Jackie shook her head and the two people watched TV. (I make them watch TV a lot don't I?)