Thank you guys SO MUCH for the reviews and alerts!

Unfortunately I still have not heard from my beta. So, once again I am looking for one, but I don't want someone who just likes my story. I want someone who will actually tell me what I'm doing wrong and when my writing absolutely sucks! If you are interested please let me know.

Short chapter...blame the VMA's & lack of sleep!

Disclaimer: Stephenie owns!

I was sitting in the lobby with Rosalie and Esme and I could tell there was something wrong. When Rosalie came back she whispered something to Emmett and he ran off. Esme gave me a smile, but it didn't reach her eyes and before I could ask any questions Rose began speaking to Esme.

"Esme, are you alright?"

She gave her daughter a warm smile and said, "Yes, dear, I just need some time."

"Are you going back?" Rose asked hesitantly.

Esme looked down at her lap, "I don't know."

"Carlisle will miss you. What will you do with out him?" Rose went to sit next to Esme and put her arm around her.

Esme looked up at her with unshed tears in her eyes, "I love Carlisle very much, Rosalie, but I never thought he would lie to me. Carlisle and Edward keep a secret from us for over eighty years and I still don't understand why. I would have understood Carlisle loving someone else. I too loved someone else, at one time. I believe he hid it because he was ashamed, but I would never judge Carlisle. I trusted him, he just didn't trust me." She said her last sentence in a whisper.

I wanted to make her feel better. I didn't care much for Carlisle, but I never wanted Esme to hurt over what he had done. "Oh, Esme, I don't think that's it. I do think Carlisle was ashamed, but not because he loved her. I think he was ashamed because he didn't love her enough. He left her and never went back to make sure she was okay. Carlisle doesn't know what happened to Abigail and I am sure he still carries a lot of guilt. He is a good man Esme; with many great qualities, but the love for his family has blurred the line between right and wrong. He does what he thinks is best for all of you instead of what is right. I may not care for Carlisle very much, but it's because of those blurred lines. He just needs to be reminded that without honesty and love, your family doesn't exist."

In that moment I knew exactly what I thought Carlisle's punishment should be. I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it before. I would call and discuss it with Aro, but not before I made a decision about the remaining Cullen's.

Esme continued to look down as she spoke, "Thank you both for your concern. I'm not sure if or when I will go back to Carlisle. Right now I just need some time to myself. Bella, you're right about Carlisle, but it's not just him. We have all made bad decisions for the love of our family and it's time we've put an end to that. I don't think our family will ever go back to the way it was, but maybe this is the way it's supposed to be." My heart broke for her. I knew she didn't want to believe her own words.

I sat back in my chair and contemplated what Esme said. It reminded me of what Marcus said about Alice messing with fate.

Maybe, thisis the way it's supposed to be.

Maybe, I had to go through all that shit with Edward.

Maybe, there is such a thing as fate.

I felt a cold hand on my shoulder and immediately knew it was Jasper by the way I calmed under his touch. "Hi."

He smiled a timid smile down at me, "Hey. You're probably tired. Why don't we get you upstairs so you can rest?"

I nodded, "That sounds good. Where'd you go?"

He looked over at Emmett and raised an eyebrow. Emmett turned away and looked at Rose.

What the fuck?

I stood up and put my hands on my hips in frustration. "Would someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?"

Jasper let out a heavy sigh, "After Rose and I checked in, we…" He stopped and ran his hands through his hair while taking an unnecessary breath, "Ah fuck Bella, Alice was here."

I froze. I didn't know what to say and I was more than a little pissed that Jasper didn't come and tell me.

Emmett chuckling broke the silence, "Don't look so angry Bella."

"How the fuck do you expect me to look Emmett? You guys come back all 'you need your rest' and didn't mention Alice at all. Would you have told me if I wouldn't have asked where you were? And, why didn't you say something Rose?" I yelled.

Rosalie didn't say anything; she just stared at me wide eyed.

Jasper chuckled, "Sit down and lower your voice, Bella. I was going to tell you in the room. I am sure Rosalie didn't tell you because she didn't want to cause you any unnecessary worry."

I sat back down in my seat, but didn't take my eyes off Jasper. "Are you going to tell me what she wanted?"

Emmett laughed, "She figured out Eddie doesn't want her and tried to get good ol' Jazzy to come home."

Jasper started to speak, the humor gone from his voice, "Thanks Emmett. That's true, but it's not as bad as Emmett made it seem. I shot her down real quick, we talked a little about Edward, and then she told us where you'll find your information about Abigail."

"What about Edward? How do you know she's telling the truth and this whole thing isn't a trap?" I couldn't believe Jasper would believe anything that came out of Alice's mouth. She had lied about so much already.

Jasper shook his head, "She didn't have much to say about Edward. She said he keeps changing his mind. I don't know if she's telling the truth, but I know they won't try anything with all of us there." He had a point.

"Where is there, exactly?" Rosalie shifted over to Emmett. She seemed uncomfortable and I'm sure it was because of Alice.

Jasper responded, "The library, she said the address was 115 South Avenue."

"Huh, I didn't think of that, public records." The moment the words were out of my mouth I felt the adrenaline start to flow through my body. We were going to find Abigail.

Jasper nodded in agreement, "That's what I figured."

I hopped out of my seat, "Well let's go."

"Now?" Jasper asked in disbelief.

I shrugged, "Sure, why not? The faster we get this over with, the faster we get out of here." It could have been three in the morning and I would have gone.

He warned, "You really should get some sleep." I knew he was right. I was so worried about Alice and Edward I didn't sleep on the plane.

"We'll go for a little while and if we don't find anything we'll try again tomorrow."

I finally got Jasper to agree and everyone was excited at the possibility that we might actually find something. We hadn't unpacked and none of us had our laptops, so I went to ask the desk clerk if she knew where the library was.

"Excuse me."

She looked up from her computer, "Yes, ma'am, how can I help you?"

"I was hoping you could give me directions to the library."

"There are several libraries in Rochester. Were you looking for one in specific?" She tilted her head to the side, in concentration.

"Yes. 115 South Avenue?"

She smiled brightly, "It's only about half a mile from here."

After getting directions to the library, I went back over to where the others were waiting. The weather was perfect to walk, but we didn't want to take any chances, so we all piled back into the rental. It didn't take us long to find our location. We walked into the library and immediately I felt my stomach drop. I wasn't sure I could do it. I suddenly didn't want to know. I didn't know if it was because I felt like I could relate to Abigail or if finding out she lived a happy human life would make me rethink my choice.

I felt the tears streaming down my face and started to panic. "Jasper."

He grabbed my by the waist and pulled me into him, "Bella, what's wrong?"

"I don't think I can do this." I cried into his shirt.

He put his finger under my chin and tilted my head up, "Darlin', it's going to be fine. What ever we find won't be that bad and we will all be there, right beside you."

I looked over at Esme, her face held an expression of panic, similar to my own. I nodded quickly to Jasper, before pulling away and walking over to her. I didn't say anything as I took her by the hand and led her to the information desk. The clerk wasn't very helpful. She pointed us in the direction of where they stored old Rochester papers and said some things were stored on their computer database. I was surprised and disappointed to find the library so unorganized. We decided the best thing to do was split up and go over anything the library had to offer between the dates 1919-1921.

I spent an hour looking through the computer's database and found nothing. There was a lot about the history of Rochester, but I saw nothing about any of the civilians. I got frustrated, gave up, and let Emmett take over. I went over to Rosalie and Esme who were sitting at a long table flipping through page after page of laminated papers. I had only been looking for about fifteen minutes when I came across Abigail's obituary. I didn't get any further then the name. What I was looking for was right in front of my face and I didn't want to know. I don't know how long I sat there before Rosalie and Esme got my attention.

"Bella...Bella!" Rosalie whisper yelled.

I shook my head trying to clear my mind, "Yeah, err, what?"

She laughed, "You spaced out. Is everything okay?"

"I can't read it." I said quietly.

"You can't read what dear?" Esme asked leaning over the table to see what I was holding.

"It's Abigail's."

Rose grabbed the paper out of my hand. She and Esme looked over it together and then I heard something I never expected to hear come from Esme's mouth, "What the fuck is this?" She asked in a panic.

Emmett walked over and asked, "What's what?"

Esme handed the paper to Jasper who was looking over her shoulder and began dry sobbing into Rosalie's chest. "What does it mean?" Jasper said.

"What does it say?" I asked.

Jasper started to read, "It says, Abigail Lillian West died in her home, while giving birth to her only son on January 19, 1921. She is survived by her mother Judith West and son Eli Cullen."

Coming up: Who is Eli Cullen?